ADHD Chatter PodcastAuDHD Explained đ§
Alex Partridge on understanding AuDHD: shame, suppression, and late diagnosis processing support.
In this episode of ADHD Chatter Podcast, featuring Alex Partridge and Alex Partridge, AuDHD Explained đ§ explores understanding AuDHD: shame, suppression, and late diagnosis processing support AuDHD can create internal suppression where a person pushes down needs and words due to fear of being judged or misunderstood.
At a glance
WHAT ITâS REALLY ABOUT
Understanding AuDHD: shame, suppression, and late diagnosis processing support
- AuDHD can create internal suppression where a person pushes down needs and words due to fear of being judged or misunderstood.
- Shame and repeated invalidation (e.g., being told youâre âtoo muchâ or âshould figure it outâ) can make asking for help feel unsafe and expose vulnerability.
- An AuDHD presentation is not static across the day, with energy, regulation, and functioning shifting from morning through nighttime.
- Clinicians often need to introduce an autism component to an existing ADHD understanding cautiously because reactions can be sensitive and complex.
- The episode positions Dr. Mark Rackleyâs long experience as a framework for supporting people processing a late AuDHD diagnosis.
IDEAS WORTH REMEMBERING
5 ideasAuDHD often amplifies self-censorship around needs.
Fear of being misunderstood or judged can lead people to âpush the words down,â avoiding disclosure even when support is needed.
Shame can be a central driver of suppression.
Messages like âyouâre too muchâ or âwhatâs wrong with you?â can condition someone to expect criticism, making help-seeking feel pointless or risky.
Avoiding communication can increase vulnerability over time.
When needs arenât expressed, the person is left managing alone, which can heighten stress and reduce opportunities for accommodation or understanding.
Daily functioning in AuDHD fluctuates throughout the day.
The transcript highlights that what someone can manage in the morning may differ markedly from afternoon or evening, suggesting supports should be time-sensitive.
How autism is introduced in an ADHD narrative matters.
The clinician describes treading carefully when adding autism to an ADHD formulation, implying that pacing and framing can strongly affect acceptance and emotional impact.
WORDS WORTH SAVING
5 quotesWhen you have an ADHD brain and an, a brain that has autism, there's internal suppression.
â Dr. Mark Rackley
There's no point in me asking for help because I'm not going to be understood. I'm going to be judged.
â Dr. Mark Rackley
All of that fear of communicating your needs... creates that internal suppression, where the person then pushes the words down.
â Dr. Mark Rackley
Like ADHD and autism, it's never static.
â Dr. Mark Rackley
I tread very carefully with this. Very, very carefully...
â Dr. Mark Rackley
QUESTIONS ANSWERED IN THIS EPISODE
5 questionsWhat does âinternal suppressionâ look like in day-to-day AuDHD lifeâthoughts, speech, body signals, or behavior?
AuDHD can create internal suppression where a person pushes down needs and words due to fear of being judged or misunderstood.
Which experiences most commonly create the shame loop in AuDHD (school, work, relationships), and how do you begin to unwind it?
Shame and repeated invalidation (e.g., being told youâre âtoo muchâ or âshould figure it outâ) can make asking for help feel unsafe and expose vulnerability.
What are practical scripts or strategies for communicating needs when you expect judgment or misunderstanding?
An AuDHD presentation is not static across the day, with energy, regulation, and functioning shifting from morning through nighttime.
You mention AuDHD isnât staticâwhat patterns do you see across the day, and how can people plan tasks and rest around those shifts?
Clinicians often need to introduce an autism component to an existing ADHD understanding cautiously because reactions can be sensitive and complex.
When telling someone they may be autistic in addition to ADHD, what wording or framing reduces defensiveness or distress?
The episode positions Dr. Mark Rackleyâs long experience as a framework for supporting people processing a late AuDHD diagnosis.
Chapter Breakdown
AuDHD âinternal suppressionâ: the push-pull of two neurotypes
The episode opens by describing how having both ADHD and autism can create a felt sense of internal suppression. The speaker frames it as a conflict where needs and words get pushed down rather than expressed.
Shame as a driver: anticipating judgment and misunderstanding
Shame is presented as a major influence on why people with AuDHD may not ask for help. The fear isnât only about the need itself, but about how others might respond.
âWhatâs wrong with you?â: the impact of invalidating reactions
The transcript highlights common dismissive or critical reactions people fear hearing. These anticipated comments reinforce masking and deepen reluctance to share needs.
Fear of communicating needs and the cost of vulnerability
The speaker connects the fear of explaining oneâs experience to a pattern of pushing words down. This avoidance is framed as leaving the person feeling exposed and vulnerable in a different wayâalone with the struggle.
Guest setup: Dr. Mark Rackley, AuDHD specialist
Host Alex Partridge introduces Dr. Mark Rackley and positions him as an AuDHD specialist. His experience working with ADHD and autism is emphasized to build context for the conversation.
Why this conversation: processing a late AuDHD diagnosis
The host states the goal of the episode: helping listeners process a late AuDHD diagnosis. This sets the expectation that the discussion will be practical and emotionally validating.
AuDHD isnât static: changes across the day
Dr. Rackley notes that, like ADHD and autism individually, AuDHD presentations shift depending on time of day and context. He lists day segments to show how needs and functioning can vary.
Introducing autism after ADHD: typical reactions and clinical caution
Alex asks what happens when someone is told there may be autism in addition to ADHD. Dr. Rackley responds that he proceeds very carefully, implying the topic can be sensitive and emotionally loaded.
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