ADHD Chatter Podcast23 AuDHD Accommodations You Don't Know About (But REALLY Need)
Alex Partridge on practical AuDHD accommodations to reduce overwhelm, shame, and burnout fast.
In this episode of ADHD Chatter Podcast, featuring Alex Partridge, 23 AuDHD Accommodations You Don't Know About (But REALLY Need) explores practical AuDHD accommodations to reduce overwhelm, shame, and burnout fast The episode reframes common AuDHD struggles as nervous-system and sensory issues, encouraging self-compassion over shame.
At a glance
WHAT IT’S REALLY ABOUT
Practical AuDHD accommodations to reduce overwhelm, shame, and burnout fast
- The episode reframes common AuDHD struggles as nervous-system and sensory issues, encouraging self-compassion over shame.
- It offers workplace accommodations that improve performance, such as flexible start times, written instructions, and a post-meeting “grace period” for ideas.
- It highlights daily-life simplifications—repeating outfits/foods, paying for convenience, and revisiting familiar places—to reduce decision fatigue and overwhelm.
- It proposes relationship and communication strategies like giving “non answers,” asking for context, and having difficult conversations while walking to lower anxiety.
- It emphasizes regulation tools (noise-canceling, music transitions, animals, bathroom breaks) to prevent dysregulation from escalating into burnout.
IDEAS WORTH REMEMBERING
5 ideasNormalize “less-than-daily” showering when sensory load is high.
They describe showering as a multi-step sensory ordeal (temperature, towel texture, cold floor, damp clothes), and argue that reducing frequency (when hygiene needs allow) can remove unnecessary stress and shame.
Use a “non answer” to stop automatic people-pleasing commitments.
Instead of reflexively saying yes, respond with “Can I let you know tomorrow?” to buy time, decide what’s truly urgent, and avoid the hard task of converting a yes into a no later.
Take a proactive mental health day to prevent longer burnout crashes.
They frame dysregulated mornings (brain fog, irritability, overwhelm) as an early warning sign; resting and regulating for 24 hours can avert needing multiple days off after pushing through.
Simplify clothing to preserve executive function for what matters.
Outfit repetition reduces daily decision load, freeing cognitive capacity for creative or demanding work—presented as a low-effort, high-impact routine.
Request flexible start times to avoid rush-hour overstimulation.
A 10-minute shift can reduce exposure to crowded trains/buses and even minimize forced small talk, helping you arrive regulated rather than frazzled.
WORDS WORTH SAVING
5 quotesAuDHD… that complex push and pull… that internal tug of war.
— Alex Partridge
Don’t let their impatience dictate your life decisions.
— Host
If you just plow through it… you’re only gonna crash into burnout.
— Alex Partridge
I am allergic to verbal instructions.
— Alex Partridge
It makes sense that I feel this way.
— Alex Partridge
QUESTIONS ANSWERED IN THIS EPISODE
5 questionsFor someone newly realizing they’re AuDHD, which 3 accommodations should they try first and how would they measure if they’re working?
The episode reframes common AuDHD struggles as nervous-system and sensory issues, encouraging self-compassion over shame.
What are specific “non answer” scripts that feel polite but firm in high-pressure work settings (boss, clients, family)?
It offers workplace accommodations that improve performance, such as flexible start times, written instructions, and a post-meeting “grace period” for ideas.
How would you pitch a “grace period after meetings” to a manager who values fast decisions and extroverted participation?
It highlights daily-life simplifications—repeating outfits/foods, paying for convenience, and revisiting familiar places—to reduce decision fatigue and overwhelm.
When does repeating the same foods/places become restrictive rather than supportive, and how can someone gently expand without overwhelm?
It proposes relationship and communication strategies like giving “non answers,” asking for context, and having difficult conversations while walking to lower anxiety.
Can you clarify the difference between anxiety and overstimulation in-the-moment—what body signals help you tell them apart?
It emphasizes regulation tools (noise-canceling, music transitions, animals, bathroom breaks) to prevent dysregulation from escalating into burnout.
Chapter Breakdown
What “AuDHD accommodations” are and why they’re different
Alex explains AuDHD as the push–pull of autism and ADHD traits (seeking stimulation but getting overwhelmed, wanting order but struggling to maintain it). They frame the episode as a practical menu of accommodations you can request or self-implement—especially when you’re newly realizing you’re AuDHD and unsure how to advocate for yourself.
Rethinking hygiene routines: showering isn’t a moral requirement
They normalize not showering daily when it’s sensory-heavy or energy-draining. The point isn’t “never shower,” but removing shame and choosing routines that fit your body, schedule, and sensory profile.
Stop auto-committing: use “non-answers” to buy thinking time
Alex recommends responding to requests with a delay rather than reflexively saying yes. A non-answer protects energy, reduces people-pleasing, and helps you make decisions without pressure.
Prevent burnout with a planned mental health day (top accommodation)
They argue mental health days should be normalized as an early intervention when dysregulation is high. Taking one day to regulate can prevent a longer burnout crash later.
Lower decision fatigue: outfit repeating + flexible start times
Two practical workplace/self-management strategies: simplify clothing choices by repeating outfits, and request small shifts in start times. Both reduce morning load and avoid overstimulating rush-hour conditions (and sometimes small talk).
Meetings that include anxious minds: ask for a grace period after discussions
Alex describes how fast, loud meeting dynamics can suppress quieter AuDHD contributors. A built-in delay plus written submissions can unlock better ideas and reduce resentment and injustice sensitivity.
Food predictability: eating the “same safe meals” (and meal-kit shortcuts)
They validate repetitive eating as a legitimate accommodation, especially when the alternative is skipping meals. The conversation also touches on texture/order preferences and reducing planning friction with meal boxes.
Regulation support: animals + brief sponsor break (Tiimo)
Alex shares how spending time with animals—especially his dog—helps him downshift from overwhelm through nonverbal connection and comfort. A short Tiimo ad follows, positioning the app as a neurodivergent-friendly planning tool.
Control sensory input: noise-canceling headphones + written instructions
They emphasize reducing background noise to improve focus and wellbeing, including a story of dramatic productivity gains in a quieter workspace. They also stress requesting tasks in writing to avoid the cognitive drain of verbal instructions (and masking during eye contact).
Reduce uncertainty spirals: demand context, then practice self-validation
Alex recommends asking for agendas/context to prevent catastrophizing when someone says “we need to talk.” They follow with a self-compassion tool—“it makes sense that I feel this way”—to counter shame around dysregulation and RSD.
Spend money to save spoons: “pay the convenience fee”
They argue that convenience purchases can be a valid accommodation, not a character flaw. Paying more upfront can reduce burnout risk and the hidden emotional/physical costs of doing everything the hard way.
Make hard talks easier (top accommodation): walk-and-talk + friendlier seating
Alex highlights movement-based conversations as less confrontational and more regulating. They also recommend sitting side-by-side rather than face-to-face to reduce eye-contact pressure, sharing simple eye-contact hacks and reframes.
Externalize memory and simplify routines: racks, photos, and repeating places
A cluster of practical environmental supports: keep socks/underwear accessible, take photos of car/locker locations, and allow yourself to revisit the same cafés/restaurants. The theme is reducing friction, search time, and novelty stress.
Smooth task switching + sensory boundaries: music, no jewelry, and body doubling (top accommodation)
They suggest using music as a dopamine bridge between tasks, opting out of irritating accessories, and leveraging body doubling for accountability and activation. Together, these reduce sensory distraction and increase task initiation.
Unmasking and public overstimulation resets (most impactful accommodation)
Alex encourages noticing what you do when alone as a clue to your authentic preferences after years of masking. They close with a key strategy: reframing “public anxiety” as overstimulation and taking short private resets (bathroom breaks, movement, breathing, even crying) to re-regulate and return.
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