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Jay Shetty Podcast

Aryna Sabalenka: “If You Heard My Self-Talk, You’d Think Something’s Wrong With Me”

How do you usually handle self-doubt? How do you find your confidence again? Today, Jay welcomes two-time U.S. Open Champion Aryna Sabalenka just days after her incredible victory.

Jay Shettyhost

Sep 10, 20251h 12mWatch on YouTube

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CHAPTERS

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Chapter summaries

U.S. Open triumph, trophy in-studio, and the emotion of winning
The episode opens with Aryna Sabalenka’s U.S. Open victory highlights and Jay Shetty welcoming her just 48 hours after winning. They set the tone for a candid conversation about what the trophy represents and the human side of elite performance.
- •Sabalenka arrives fresh off a Grand Slam win and brings the trophy
- •Jay reflects on watching her live and her sportsmanship
- •Sabalenka shares excitement about being on the podcast
- •The conversation frames the win as both achievement and emotional release
Winning again—but this time it feels like the first
Jay asks how it feels to win another U.S. Open, and Sabalenka explains why this title hits differently. She describes a difficult season and how the win feels like relief after earlier disappointments.
- •Every Grand Slam win feels huge, but context changes the meaning
- •Early-season struggles made this victory feel like a “first” again
- •Losing as a favorite created emotional weight and pressure
- •The trophy symbolizes growth in emotional control and resilience
Processing defeat: pain, avoidance, and learning without rewatching
Sabalenka breaks down what losing—especially in finals—does to her emotionally and how she recovers. She explains why she avoids watching lost finals and delegates technical review to her team to protect her mental health.
- •Final losses hurt more because the dream feels inches away
- •Her instinct is to leave quickly, then process later
- •She does not watch finals she lost; the team reviews and reports back
- •Rewatching can retrigger pain and reinforce unwanted behavior patterns
Pressure before and during a Slam: the unseen workload and nonstop mental prep
They explore how Grand Slam preparation is more than training—it includes sponsor events, interviews, and constant obligations. Sabalenka describes the intense internal dialogue required to stay composed across multiple weeks.
- •Pre-Slam week includes meetings, dinners, and media on top of practice
- •Physical prep (tennis, gym, fitness) is only part of readiness
- •Mental prep means expecting unpredictability—form can change daily
- •Her inner self-talk is continuous and intense throughout the tournament cycle
Inside a champion’s self-talk: accepting nerves instead of fighting them
Jay zooms in on the “conversation inside the head,” and Sabalenka explains how she works with doubt and anxiety. Her key shift is accepting nervous thoughts as normal rather than trying to eliminate them.
- •Nerves and self-doubt are universal for athletes before big events
- •Trying to suppress thoughts makes them grow (“what you resist persists”)
- •Acceptance normalizes pressure and reduces isolation (“everyone feels this”)
- •Early in her career she thought she was the only one—later reframed it as a shared battle
Why celebrating matters: joy, gratitude, and inner validation
Sabalenka and Jay discuss celebration as part of performance, not a distraction. She shares how she celebrates with her team and also privately acknowledges her own pride and effort.
- •Celebration is a deliberate way to honor hard work and uncertainty
- •She celebrates with the team because the trophy feels shared
- •Private celebration is internal: telling herself she’s proud
- •Inner validation lasts longer than external applause and reflects unseen sacrifice
Childhood foundations: her father’s humor and her early self-belief
Jay invites Sabalenka to share memories that shaped her identity. She credits her father’s positive, playful personality—and a childhood moment of declaring she’d be “future Sabalenka”—as early signals of her mindset.
- •Her dad modeled humor, positivity, and lifting others’ moods
- •She connects her “playfulness” and expressions to him
- •As a kid she rejected comparisons (“future Sabalenka”)
- •These stories illustrate early confidence and identity formation
How tennis began: an active kid, a случайная stop at the courts, and slow-build ambition
Sabalenka explains how her father introduced her to tennis while looking for an outlet for her energy. She describes winning locally, then realizing around 16–17 that she could compete internationally and climb the circuit.
- •Tennis started as a way to keep an active child busy
- •Her father wasn’t a tennis player; he came from hockey and survived a major injury
- •He emphasized effort and fighting over winning or losing
- •She grew through ITF levels and gradually believed in international potential
Morning routine + mindset development: from sports psychologist dependence to self-leadership
Sabalenka outlines her match-day and non-match-day routines, emphasizing sleep and recovery. She also shares her experience working with a sports psychologist, then stepping away to take responsibility for emotional control.
- •Match-day routine varies by start time; she prioritizes sleep and mobility
- •Non-match days emphasize lighter hitting, treatment, and recovery
- •Worked with a sports psychologist for 4–5 years and tried meditation-like practices
- •She stopped when she felt dependent, leading to deeper self-understanding and balance
On-court intensity vs off-court joy: balancing performance with personal life
Jay asks how her personal life impacts tennis, and Sabalenka describes the need for balance. She explains that her aggressive on-court persona isn’t who she is off-court, and that joy and fun fuel better focus.
- •She differentiates competitive aggression from her off-court personality
- •Balance prevents burnout and helps her show up fully on match days
- •Enjoyment off-court improves mental steadiness and performance
- •She aims to be seen as fun and kind beyond the athlete persona
Equality in tennis and fashion as performance confidence
The conversation shifts to women’s sports, pay equity, and representation. Sabalenka also shares how fashion helps her feel confident, have fun, and bring cultural energy into tennis.
- •She tries not to be distracted by gender comparisons and focuses on representing well
- •Acknowledges ongoing fight for equality and credits Billie Jean King
- •Notes differences in physicality but insists the work and dedication are equal
- •Fashion is a confidence tool: experimenting with looks, styling, and self-expression
Turning grief into strength: losing her father and redefining love
Sabalenka opens up about the unexpected loss of her father and how deeply it affected her. She describes training as a refuge during grief and explains how his presence remains a motivation and a source of protection in her mind.
- •Her father was a key emotional anchor who understood her and knew what to say
- •She stayed strong publicly for her mother while grieving privately
- •Practice became the only place her mind could rest from grief
- •She frames life as birth, love, and death—accepting what can’t be controlled
- •Love is felt as comfort, wholeness, and acceptance of both good and bad sides
Discipline defines success: pushing through slumps, near-quitting, and building confidence
Sabalenka defines success as discipline—showing up even when you don’t want to. She recounts a career low point when her serve collapsed, how she nearly quit, and how overcoming challenges built durable confidence.
- •Success equals consistent discipline, not just trophies
- •Loving something doesn’t mean liking it every day—breakthroughs come in resistance
- •She nearly quit during a severe serving/double-fault crisis
- •Hiring a biomechanics expert helped resolve technical issues
- •Confidence is built through small daily actions: waking early, showing up, repeating habits
Rituals, opponents, and the power of the right people
Jay asks about rituals and toughest opponents, and Sabalenka shares practical routines—especially her consistent breakfast. She also explains why “yourself” is the hardest mental opponent, names tough physical matchups, and gives advice on building a trustworthy team.
- •Tournament ritual: consistent breakfast (avocado toast, perfectly cooked eggs, salmon)
- •On-court habits include repeatedly taking balls from the same ball kid after a good point
- •Mentally toughest opponent is herself; physically challenging rivals include Coco and Iga
- •Her advice to young athletes: surround yourself with the right people
- •Finding the right coach/agent/team takes time and sometimes betrayal, but it’s foundational
Rest, recovery, and what comes next: celebrating, Battle of the Sexes, and Final Five
Sabalenka explains why rest and joyful downtime are essential for performance and mental health—especially during tournaments. They preview her upcoming “Battle of the Sexes” match concept with Nick, then close with Jay’s Final Five rapid questions and Sabalenka’s personal principles.
- •She’s giving herself a few days to celebrate before returning to training
- •Recovery is a priority: sleep, dinners, and joy are part of the process—not distractions
- •Battle of the Sexes details: modified court dynamics and playful trash talk
- •Final Five highlights: father’s advice to focus on yourself; she clarifies her off-court personality; her wish for a ‘conversation-first’ world without war

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