The Mel Robbins Podcast8 Simple, Research-Backed Changes That Will Change Your Life | The Mel Robbins Podcast
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80 min read · 15,662 words- 0:00 – 0:35
Intro
- MRMel Robbins
(ticking sound) Get ready. It is Science Hour. We've got brand new research, everybody.
- TRTracy
So, this study, when I first read it, I was a little bit floored by it. So, this is a-
- MRMel Robbins
Floored in the, this is stupid or floored? 'Cause there's some-
- TRTracy
A mix. It- it felt-
- MRMel Robbins
... there's some research we find.
- TRTracy
... stupid and I cannot believe how big of an impact and how big this study is for one second each day.
- MRMel Robbins
Wait, one second?
- TRTracy
One second.
- MRMel Robbins
Well, you know, I think five seconds can change somebody.
- TRTracy
Five seconds.
- MRMel Robbins
You are taking it down, Tracy.
- TRTracy
This one thing. (upbeat music)
- MRMel Robbins
Hey,
- 0:35 – 3:35
Introduction and Meeting Tracey from Team Mel (Head of Research)
- MRMel Robbins
it's your friend Mel, and get ready. It is Science Hour on The Mel Robbins Podcast. I am so fired up for today's conversation 'cause I am going to introduce you to one of my favorite people on the planet.
- TRTracy
Oh, thank you.
- MRMel Robbins
That is Tracy. Tracy and I have worked together for years. She is, no joke, the smartest person I know. I have a huge brain crush on her. She heads up the research that we do here on all projects that we do. Uh, Tracy has done the research on six audio productions for Audible-
- TRTracy
Mm-hmm.
- MRMel Robbins
... two self-published audio books and hard cover books, all of the courses that we have taught for folks like Starbucks, LinkedIn-
- TRTracy
Mm-hmm.
- MRMel Robbins
... CreativeLive. The list goes on and on and on. And Tracy and I geek out on research.
- TRTracy
Mm-hmm.
- MRMel Robbins
We absolutely love it, right Trace?
- TRTracy
Yes, definitely.
- MRMel Robbins
And everything that we talk about here on The Mel Robbins Podcast, we have meticulously researched. In fact, Tracy and I get in fights all the time.
- TRTracy
(laughs)
- MRMel Robbins
Like, mental fights.
- TRTracy
Yes, yeah. (laughs)
- MRMel Robbins
She's like, "Technically, you can't say that," or, "That science, that- that research study that everybody's talking about technically does not say that, so you can..." And so we are meticulous and super interested in this. And so, I am so excited for today's show because we are about to talk about eight things. What are we talking about? What are we-
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
There's eight things we're talking about.
- TRTracy
Yeah, definitely. So, the first thing is that every single thing you always hear about in your work and Mel's podcast is always true, it's always real, and you can always trust it. And so, Mel wanted to talk about some of the absolute newest, most amazing habits and new studies of things that you can apply right now. And so, we've been diving in all day to all the newest, most awesome research, and we wanted to share it with you guys today.
- MRMel Robbins
So, this is also like a behind the scenes, because this is how we produce the show. We look at your DMs, your questions.
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
We look at what's trending, we consider what's going on in-
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
... my life, your life, people's lives on the team, in our extended families and friend groups, and then we dig into research.
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
So, today, we've got brand new research, everybody.
- TRTracy
Yes. (laughs)
- MRMel Robbins
And we are to introduce you to very simple behavior changes that you can institute immediately that will improve your life.
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
All grounded by research.
- TRTracy
Mm-hmm.
- 3:35 – 8:40
Research Study #1 -The simple action that has a massive impact
- TRTracy
Texas at Austin and UChicago, all about the power of random acts of kindness. And this study is called A Little Good Goes an Unexpectedly Long Way, Underestimating the Positive Impact of Kindness on Recipients.
- MRMel Robbins
Okay, but we all know that acts of kindness are things that make us feel good, but why is this brand new research something we have to pay attention to? So like, in the year ahead, acts of kindness, people, all day long. How come we have to pay attention to this?
- TRTracy
Definitely. So, what the researchers really looked into is, why do we not do random acts of kindness? Because what they found is they're actually pretty uncommon. We think that, oh, we just do this, we all know what to do. We don't. Most people do not do random acts of kindness. And it's because we actually don't think it's gonna matter to other people.
- MRMel Robbins
Oh.
- TRTracy
Yeah, and what the researchers found is it does. No matter how tiny, a random act of kindness makes a massive difference for someone else, and you are happier as a result of doing it.
- MRMel Robbins
So, that's interesting.
- TRTracy
Mm-hmm.
- MRMel Robbins
So, we know that we should be doing this, but what you're saying is that we don't do this, and this is where the insight comes in.
- TRTracy
Yes.
- MRMel Robbins
Is that we assume it's not gonna matter.
- TRTracy
Exactly.
- MRMel Robbins
And a random act of kindness, it's like the littlest thing.
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
Smiling at somebody.
- TRTracy
Mm-hmm.
- MRMel Robbins
Putting your arm around somebody.
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
Waving somebody into traffic.
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
Um, you know, even tipping-
- TRTracy
Yes, huge one.
- MRMel Robbins
... somebody that's making your coffee and looking at them and saying thank you.
- TRTracy
Mm-hmm.
- MRMel Robbins
These are all small things that make a difference, and we think it doesn't make a difference. And so, I think that's where the learning is, at least for me-
- TRTracy
Yeah, definitely.
- MRMel Robbins
... is that you're not doing it not because you don't think it- it's an important thing to do. You're not doing it because you don't think it matters.
- TRTracy
Yes, exactly. And The New York Times picked up this brand new study, ran a huge article on it, and there were thousands of comments of people sharing their stories of random acts of kindness, and it's a reminder that these do matter to people.
- MRMel Robbins
And here's the interesting twist about this story, and it's why Tracy was so excited to talk about this particular piece of research. The stories were not from people who were like, "Oh, I started a pay if forward- forward chain."
- TRTracy
No.
- MRMel Robbins
Which, by the way...You know how everybody starts doing the pay it forward chains-
- 8:40 – 13:26
Research Study #2 - How to build strength in just 3 seconds a day
- MRMel Robbins
- TRTracy
Okay, great. So this second piece of research is very exciting as we think about the new year is coming, a lot of us want new fitness routines. But it always seems to be easier to talk about creating that new routine-
- MRMel Robbins
Mm-hmm.
- TRTracy
... than actually implementing it.
- MRMel Robbins
Okay.
- TRTracy
Especially when you're busy like you and I both are. This is a brand new study that is called Less Gym Time, Same Results.
- MRMel Robbins
I'm down. Less gym time, same results. Let's go people. What do we do?
- TRTracy
Brand new big study from researchers at Edith Cowan University in Australia, along with whole research teams in Japan and Brazil. Listen to this. All you need to do to build your strength is do what's called the eccentric muscle contraction, AKA, the second half of any exercise.
- MRMel Robbins
Okay. I don't know what-
- TRTracy
So-
- MRMel Robbins
... you're talking about.
- TRTracy
... imagine that you were standing up-
- MRMel Robbins
Uh-huh.
- TRTracy
... to sit down in your chair or to squat.
- MRMel Robbins
Okay.
- TRTracy
It's simply the motion of the sitting down part, not the standing up.
- MRMel Robbins
Okay. So let me see if I'm getting this straight. So are you basically saying that so many of us are losing the benefit of certain things we do all day long, like for me plopping into a chair?
- TRTracy
Yes.
- MRMel Robbins
I let gravity do the work.
- TRTracy
If-
- MRMel Robbins
I do not consider sitting in a chair exercise. Are you telling me that this study says that I can consciously sit in a chair differently and I will be exercising?
- TRTracy
Yes. It says that one muscle contraction in this downward movement for just three seconds a day can increase muscle strength if you do it each day.
- MRMel Robbins
(laughs) What? Well, okay. So you're not even necessarily talking about how, like, if you're doing bicep curls, you know how people are like, "You gotta slow down and not just flump the- the weight down"?
- TRTracy
And that is true. And that, in the research they did use bicep curls to say people who just did the downward and then put their weights down and then maybe they just got them back up but it wasn't part of the motion.
- MRMel Robbins
Yep.
- TRTracy
Yes. In exercise they're saying you can cut your routine in half by just doing the second half of each exercise, but you can apply this in your life-
- MRMel Robbins
Wow.
- TRTracy
... for passive exercise.
- MRMel Robbins
Okay. I'm down with passive exercise. I remember when my mom found this revolutionary way of exercising where you literally lay on a table and they strap your feet into things and they lift your legs for you. (laughs)
- TRTracy
(laughs)
- 13:26 – 17:03
Research #3 - The sound that boosts your mood for 8 hours
- TRTracy
when I first read it, I was a little bit floored by it. So, this is a-
- MRMel Robbins
Floored in the, this is stupid or floored? 'Cause there's some-
- TRTracy
A mix. It felt-
- MRMel Robbins
... there's some research we find.
- TRTracy
... stupid and I cannot believe how big of an impact and how big this study is for what it is, but I think this is a very simple thing that anyone can do for one second each day.
- MRMel Robbins
Wait! One second?
- TRTracy
One second.
- MRMel Robbins
Well, you know I think five seconds can change somebody.
- TRTracy
Five seconds.
- MRMel Robbins
You are taking it down, Tracy.
- TRTracy
This one thing is going to give you an improvement in mental well-being for eight hours and it works in healthy people, it works in those with depression, it works in those with all different kinds of mental health challenges. Here is the study. This was a huge study in the UK at King's College London, huge reputable research university, that was published in Scientific Reports.
- MRMel Robbins
Can I just stop you?
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
Because I'm trying to think of what this is.
- TRTracy
Okay. (laughs)
- MRMel Robbins
One second-
- TRTracy
I don't think you're gonna get it right. (laughs)
- MRMel Robbins
... eight hour orgasm?
- TRTracy
No. (laughs)
- MRMel Robbins
No? (laughs) Okay.
- TRTracy
No.
- MRMel Robbins
I can't think of anything else.
- TRTracy
So, this study took place across a four-year span. They collected data of 20,000 assessments and they had global participants in this study. And do you know what they found, Mel?
- MRMel Robbins
That would improve my life for eight hours after just doing this for one second? No.
- TRTracy
The study is called Feeling Chirpy. So, in the study, what's really interesting, too, is you might think, okay, you're out in nature. That's the benefit.
- MRMel Robbins
Yeah.
- TRTracy
But no. They isolated... It is not about trees, it is not about plants, it is not about being by the water. It works if you listen on an app.
- MRMel Robbins
Really?
- TRTracy
There is something about the sound of birds. You can go on YouTube, you can listen to a bird song app, you could get outside, but that deeply resonates with us even at a subconscious level for eight hours of improved mental well-being, up to. Up to eight hours.
- MRMel Robbins
That's incredible. You know what? It reminds me, um, up here in, uh, Vermont when my in-laws owned this house, there was a clock that used to hang in the kitchen and every single hour was the photo of a different bird-
- 17:03 – 21:25
Research Study #4 - A powerful tool for anxiety
- TRTracy
now that we're so grounded after our bird sound, there is a huge brand new, like, just published study from Georgetown Medical Center published in the JAMA Psychiatry Journal, which is a really big prestigious journal, so this research is legit.
- MRMel Robbins
My dad used to get that. The Journal, I think it was of American Medical Association?
- TRTracy
Probably.
- MRMel Robbins
I can't believe-
- TRTracy
So, this is legit. They compared, in people who have anxiety, taking Lexapro versus doing mindfulness-based stress reduction, which often looks like a body scan or gratitude journaling.
- MRMel Robbins
Now, by body scan, you don't mean climbing into an MRI?
- TRTracy
No. I mean, how is my body feeling right now?
- MRMel Robbins
So, a lot of times in yoga, um, they'll use this relaxation technique-
- TRTracy
Mm-hmm.
- MRMel Robbins
... in a class where you're like-
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
... you know, scrunch up your feet, relax them. Scrunch your ankles, relax them.
- TRTracy
Yes.
- MRMel Robbins
You know, like, uh, uh, flex your quads, relax them. That's sort of a way to kind of body scan.
- TRTracy
Yes.
- MRMel Robbins
So, that's one example. What's another example they use?
- TRTracy
Gratitude journaling.
- MRMel Robbins
Really?
- TRTracy
Yes. That's a powerful example of mindfulness-based stress reduction.
- MRMel Robbins
Okay. So, they studied Lexapro.
- TRTracy
Yes.
- MRMel Robbins
And then, they also studied these mindfulness techniques that bring you into your body and into the moment.
- TRTracy
Yes. And there are a number of them, but those are just two to highlight, is the-
- MRMel Robbins
Okay.
- TRTracy
... gratitude journaling, and what they found is the drop......in anxiety was equal between Lexapro and just doing these deliberate, mindfulness-based stress reduction practices, like a gratitude journal.
- MRMel Robbins
Wow.
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
I think I have a hunch for why that-
- TRTracy
Why?
- MRMel Robbins
... might be. Well, because as somebody who has dealt with and felt anxiety-
- 21:25 – 25:12
Research Study #5 - A surprising truth about willpower and how to be more successful
- TRTracy
interesting, and it is about willpower.
- MRMel Robbins
Hmm.
- TRTracy
So, a big study from UPenn and Michigan looked at 20,000 high schoolers as they studied for and took the SAT exam.
- MRMel Robbins
Okay.
- TRTracy
What they found, taking into account socioeconomic status, all of their prior achievements throughout high school even, what matters the most for their study plan and their scores is if they didn't rely on willpower and set themselves up with strategies to better be able to study.
- MRMel Robbins
So, you're saying if the students didn't do what I did or didn't do what I see my kids doing, which is basically you got the laptop open, you got the phone on-
- TRTracy
Yes.
- MRMel Robbins
... you got piles of books all around you, and you're just gonna try to plow through it?
- TRTracy
Yes.
- MRMel Robbins
If instead, you get deliberate about chunking it out, putting the phone to the side-
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
... having deliberate blocks of time to study, that you're-
- TRTracy
Mm-hmm.
- MRMel Robbins
... gonna do better on the test?
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
Why?
- TRTracy
And in particular, the ones they mentioned was disabling your cellphone.
- MRMel Robbins
Okay. So, turn the phone off. If you're serious about performing better-
- TRTracy
Yes.
- MRMel Robbins
... you gotta turn the phone off when you're preparing. Okay? That's number one.
- TRTracy
Setting up a distraction-free place to get your work done.
- MRMel Robbins
Setting up a distraction-free place. I'm, I'm starting to smile, Trace, because yesterday Tracy and I-
- TRTracy
(laughs)
- MRMel Robbins
... were going over the final draft to our newsletter that goes out twice a week. It's amazing.
- TRTracy
Mm-hmm.
- MRMel Robbins
Just go to MelRobbins.com to sign up for it. (laughs) And Tracy was trying to get me to focus.
- TRTracy
Mel was doing some online shopping-
- MRMel Robbins
That's right. (laughs)
- TRTracy
... while writing the newsletter to you guys, two tabs open.
- MRMel Robbins
And so Tracy was so awesome. She, without skipping a beat, you didn't even look at me. You just reached your hand over and shut the, the laptop, and then shoved it away from me.
- 25:12 – 31:33
Research Study #6 - One thing you can do today to create lifelong positive memories
- TRTracy
a really interesting study that once you hear it, you're gonna resonate with this in your own life, and it's about smell and food recalling a memory instantly when you smell something that brings you back to a old time and place.
- MRMel Robbins
Okay.
- TRTracy
So, this is a study out of Lancaster University in the UK, brand new study, where they actually asked older people who, at this point in their life, you know, maybe they're not having as many exciting new experiences for a really amazing memory of their past. And they created something for them to smell and taste that took them back to a big moment.
- MRMel Robbins
Hmm.
- TRTracy
They actually 3D printed these tastes and smells on like a little Listerine strip type thing, so crazy research.
- MRMel Robbins
What? Like, like, the taste of your favorite ice cream treat from a vendor. You know, like, I'm thinking about like-
- TRTracy
Yes, at your wedding, that one couple, it was the food at their wedding. They were able to taste it, and, or someone who had a curry tasting one, they took them back to that memory. Strawberries from a day when they were young, and instantly people were vividly transported back to this memory instantly.
- MRMel Robbins
Wow.
- TRTracy
And the researchers say this is a very powerful implication for creating happiness hacks. If you knew that in the past you had the best vacation, the best memory, you can instantly access that deep memory by smelling that smell, having that food.
- MRMel Robbins
That makes a lot of sense.
- TRTracy
Mm-hmm.
- MRMel Robbins
Uh, uh, uh, my, my wheels are spinning 'cause I'm thinking about my friend Pete Sheehan who made me a cup of tea once.
- TRTracy
Mm-hmm.
- MRMel Robbins
And he was very particular about how he made it because-
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
... he said only his mother has ever been able to make tea-
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
... that tastes as good as this certain way.
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
And what I bet is, I bet it brings him back to his childhood.
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
Now, what's interesting about this, because this research that you're talking about in terms of how taste and smell cues memory-
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
... this is specifically applied to very positive memories.
- TRTracy
Very positive, yes.
- MRMel Robbins
And it's, it's, it's really kind of cool when you stop and think about the fact that you can, as you said, hack happiness by bringing very positive memories. I remember a really interesting story that has always stuck with me because we know that this is true-
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
... based on trauma research.
- TRTracy
Mm-hmm.
- MRMel Robbins
That, that smell in particular can trigger a trauma response.
- 31:33 – 40:00
Research Study #7 - How tiny guilty pleasures can strengthen your relationship with your partner
- TRTracy
near the end of these new studies. This one I thought was so much fun. It's a study from Indiana University, the University of Connecticut, and Duke, and here's what it's about. It's about those mundane secrets that we hide from the closest people in our life. And that means, well, here's what the researchers define mundane secrets as: hiding small online purchases, foods that you don't want your partner or friends to know that you eat, or things like watching a TV show ahead of your partner-
- MRMel Robbins
(laughs)
- TRTracy
... when you guys are doing it together, and they don't know that you're sneaking ahead.
- MRMel Robbins
And then you sit there and pretend that you haven't when you watch the episode.
- TRTracy
This- the research is-
- MRMel Robbins
I can't do that. I- I can sneak ahead, but when the episode comes on, I- I can no longer sit there and pretend that I haven't seen it.
- TRTracy
(laughs)
- MRMel Robbins
That's the part where the gig is up for me.
- TRTracy
So the researchers found that 90% of people have recently kept one of these everyday consumer behaviors a secret from a very close person in their life, a friend or their partner. And they report, "You know what? My partner probably wouldn't care if they knew I watched ahead or I snuck a piece of cake," but they keep it a secret. 90% of us have these tiny little guilty secrets.
- MRMel Robbins
Now, is this something we should do? Because everything that you've-
- TRTracy
This is interesting.
- MRMel Robbins
... recommended so far is additive.
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
So, yes, I am guilty of watching a show ahead and not telling Chris, but I always confess when we're sitting there. But they also did... Go ahead.
- TRTracy
Well, what's interesting is they actually found this is not a bad thing. It is okay to have your little guilty pleasures. You can hide little things from your partner. This is not about being dishonest. Listen to this. Tiny feelings of guilt, which don't hurt anybody, actually drives you to wanna be better to your partner.
- MRMel Robbins
Well, that makes sense because guilt has two forms. Destructive, which is the-
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
... guilt that you use against yourself where you just beat yourself up and make yourself-
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
... feel bad, and then the guilt that is, um, really productive-
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
... because it motivates you to wanna do better. And so are you saying that if, let's say, I'm trying to think of an example.
- TRTracy
Well, I can give you an example that the study researchers found very common.
- MRMel Robbins
Okay.
- TRTracy
What they found common is usually both partners do the same secret behavior and they hide it from the other.
- MRMel Robbins
(laughs)
- TRTracy
And a very common one is around diet.
- MRMel Robbins
Okay.
- TRTracy
Like, both partners are vegetarians when they're together, and they secretly eat meat not together.
- MRMel Robbins
What?
- 40:00 – 44:10
Research Study #8 - The habit that will the largest impact on your quality of life
- MRMel Robbins
- TRTracy
Yeah. So, this piece of research is something that researchers actually show is the easiest habit to make the largest impact in your life.
- MRMel Robbins
And what is it? You can tell them what it is.
- TRTracy
It's being kind to yourself.
- MRMel Robbins
This is so profound that I want to dedicate the next episode-
- TRTracy
Oh.
- MRMel Robbins
... to just the research-
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
... on how to be kinder to yourself, because this recent study, I know. And the irony is, of all the things that you could change in the coming year, the research is conclusive that learning how to be kind to yourself as a daily practice-
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
... has the single biggest impact on your happiness, on your meaning-
- TRTracy
Mm-hmm.
- MRMel Robbins
... on your sense of purpose, and the sad thing is, it is the one we practice the least.
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
And this is so important that the very next episode that we drop in the Mel Robbins Podcast is gonna go deep on the topic of being kinder to yourself, how to make it a habit, why it matters, and we are also going to do a bonus episode with it-
- TRTracy
Great.
- MRMel Robbins
... where we're gonna take people's questions about it, because yes, let's squat down on the chair, let's listen to the birds-
- TRTracy
(laughs)
- MRMel Robbins
... let's structure our study time. Let's get the smells going, people. Let's be mindful. Let's, uh, what were the other one... What was the first one we did? See, I've already forgotten.
- TRTracy
(laughs) The first one we did is around the random act of kindness.
- MRMel Robbins
Oh, kindness. Amp up the kindness. Let's go. And kindness towards self-
- TRTracy
Yeah.
- MRMel Robbins
... is the biggest thing you should do, which is why we're gonna talk about it in the next episode. Tracy, you are amaze-balls.
- TRTracy
Thank you for having me on, Mel.
- MRMel Robbins
Having you on? You are the brains behind this operation. We are gonna have you on more. We, of course, are gonna put together copious show notes. We're gonna link to every single study. What's the one you're most excited to do?
- TRTracy
I think the study I'm most excited about is the bird chirping because I never listen to the birds, honestly. And if I'd known it was that important, I would.
- MRMel Robbins
Well, now I'm going to.
- TRTracy
So now I'm going to. Yeah. (laughs)
- MRMel Robbins
Now I'm going to. I think I need to chain my ringer. Then I'll be happy every time the phone rings.
- TRTracy
I, I think that I should change my morning alarm to be a bird chirping sound-
Episode duration: 44:10
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