Modern WisdomWhy Nobody Seems To Care About Incels - Dr Andrew Thomas
At a glance
WHAT IT’S REALLY ABOUT
Inside Incels: Mental Health, Misogyny, and Misunderstood Male Suffering
- Dr. Andrew Thomas discusses his large-scale research on incels, arguing that mental health and ideology are stronger predictors of harm than online networking alone, and that these two factors reinforce each other in a damaging feedback loop.
- He challenges popular stereotypes of incels as uniformly right‑wing, white, violent extremists, showing instead a diverse, often left‑leaning community with high rates of autism, rejection sensitivity, and perceived victimhood.
- Thomas criticizes academic and media framings that dismiss mental‑health approaches as ‘excusing’ incels, and warns that labeling them as violent monsters entrenches their alienation and online radicalization.
- The conversation broadens into wider issues of online misogyny, male mental health, therapy failures (especially for men with female therapists), shifting mating markets, body‑count norms, and demographic trends in fertility.
IDEAS WORTH REMEMBERING
5 ideasTarget mental health to indirectly reduce harmful incel ideology.
Thomas’ study found mental health problems and incel ideology are both stronger predictors of harm than networking, and each worsens the other. Because changing ideology directly is very hard, improving mental health may be a more tractable way to reduce both suffering and extremist beliefs.
Abandon one-dimensional stereotypes about incels; the community is heterogeneous.
Data show roughly a third of incels are non‑white, many are politically centrist or left‑leaning, and most are not violent. Within the label are at least two distinct risk clusters—autistic, bullied, low‑status men versus dark‑triad, right‑wing men—who likely require very different interventions.
Stop framing empathy and support for ‘bad’ men as zero-sum.
Critiques that mental‑health approaches ‘validate incel victimhood’ assume empathy and resources are limited and that male suffering matters less than other groups’ suffering. Thomas argues this logic is both ethically flawed and practically counterproductive if the goal is to reduce misogyny and harm.
Recognize how online forum culture can function as ‘reverse CBT.’
Concepts like ‘cope’ and the ‘crabs in a bucket’ dynamic harden all‑or‑nothing thinking and punish hopeful narratives, reinforcing hopelessness and disengagement. Any intervention needs to disrupt these cognitive patterns and offer alternative communities or narratives.
Be precise with terms like ‘violence’ and ‘misogyny’ to design effective policy.
Lumping together mass shootings, doxxing, and offensive posts under ‘incel violence’ obscures very different behaviors and risk profiles. Thomas stresses that sloppy, umbrella labels make it harder to build targeted, evidence‑based prevention and de‑radicalization strategies.
WORDS WORTH SAVING
5 quotesThe worse an incel’s mental health was, the more into the ideology they were—and the more they got into the ideology, the worse their mental health became.
— Dr. Andrew Thomas
I want to stop misogyny full stop, and I want to stop suffering full stop. I don’t care so much about how you get there as long as you get there.
— Dr. Andrew Thomas
If you label incels as violent monsters, you’re just feeding into the problem and validating their belief that society already hates them.
— Dr. Andrew Thomas
Men come to have a conversation with me that they can’t have with anyone.
— Dr. Andrew Thomas
People think there is a sexual double standard, but when you ask them about their own choices, they don’t actually apply it.
— Dr. Andrew Thomas
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