The Diary of a CEOAnn Summers CEO: The Heartbreaking Story Of One Of Britain's Richest Women! Jacqueline Gold CBE
CHAPTERS
- 0:00 – 4:40
Introduction: An Unbelievable Life Story
Steven Bartlett frames Jacqueline Gold as one of the most successful and inspiring businesswomen in Europe, whose life has been marked by extreme misfortune and resilience. He introduces her role in transforming Ann Summers and normalizing conversations about sex, hinting that her story is dramatic enough to be a film.
- •Steven describes Jacqueline as one of the wealthiest and most remarkable women in the UK.
- •Ann Summers is introduced as a brand that popularized sex toys and challenged sexual stigma.
- •Steven signals that the conversation will cover devastating, movie‑like twists in her life.
- •The focus will be on courage, resilience, heartbreak, and culture change.
- 4:40 – 12:40
Childhood: Abuse, Control, and the Birth of Independence
Jacqueline recounts an unconventional, traumatic childhood: her parents’ separation, her mother’s extreme fearfulness and control, and years of sexual abuse by her mother’s boyfriend. She explains how repeated betrayals and lack of protection pushed her toward financial independence as a route to escape.
- •Parents split when she was 12; younger sister was 7 years younger and less affected.
- •Mother’s boyfriend sexually abused her from 12–15; mother appears to have known but minimized or denied it.
- •Mother was irrationally overprotective (no sleepovers, parties, front‑garden play) yet left her in vulnerable situations with the abuser.
- •Jacqueline’s aunt later confirmed she had warned the mother after seeing something concerning.
- •Jacqueline forgives her mother but views her as deeply insecure and “scared of life.”
- •Trauma led Jacqueline to see earning her own money as her only real escape.
- 12:40 – 19:40
Sisters, Different Childhoods, and Rejecting the Victim Label
Jacqueline contrasts her own experience with her younger sister Vanessa’s, noting how a few years’ age difference changed everything about their exposure to adversity. She emphasizes that everyone processes trauma differently and explains why she personally refuses to see herself as a victim, despite multiple serious life events.
- •Vanessa is seven years younger, more outspoken and confident, and now a successful businesswoman and Jacqueline’s best friend.
- •They have spoken about abuse but Vanessa chooses not to detail her own experience.
- •Jacqueline felt lonely and shy as a child, confined to literal circles drawn in the sand.
- •She underlines that privilege or success doesn’t erase life challenges; they just manifest differently.
- •She has endured multiple later adversities: losing her six‑year‑old son, being poisoned by a nanny, receiving a bullet in the post.
- •Her coping strategy is to refuse a victim identity and seek meaning and positive outcomes in each negative event.
- 19:40 – 26:20
Confronting Her Abuser and Finding Personal Power
Jacqueline describes the moment at 15 when she finally confronted her abuser, carefully framing the conversation to avoid his anger. Only as an adult does she fully recognize how brave she was and how much more power she had than she realized, despite being conditioned to people‑please.
- •She planned the confrontation for a long time but lacked courage as a very young 15‑year‑old.
- •To minimize conflict, she told him the abuse “wasn’t fair on Mum” rather than on herself.
- •He barely responded—just shrugged—and the abuse stopped immediately.
- •She now sees that she unconsciously protected his feelings, reflecting gendered socialization to please and be “well‑behaved.”
- •Looking back, she feels both disappointed with that framing and proud of her bravery as a child who ended the abuse herself.
- •This experience reinforces her belief in extracting positives from even the worst traumas.
- 26:20 – 34:00
From Shy, Overprotected Girl to Courageous Leader
Steven probes how such a shy, tightly controlled child became a bold CEO and cultural crusader. Jacqueline explains that shyness is situational, not innate, and that a deep inner fire and passion for her mission forced her to step into public roles despite fear.
- •She argues we’re not born shy; environment and upbringing create it.
- •You can be shy yet still have intense ambition and “fire in your belly.”
- •She recounts organizing her first conference for ~500 sales ambassadors at the Grand Hotel, Brighton, in her early 20s.
- •She was terrified but found that speaking about something you deeply care about transforms the experience.
- •Her philosophy: courage precedes confidence; repeated steps outside your comfort zone expand it.
- •Steven connects this to how successful people accumulate “evidence” that they can handle discomfort, which enlarges their scope for action.
- 34:00 – 45:40
Work as Escape and Early Physical Consequences of Trauma
Work becomes Jacqueline’s only sanctioned escape from a controlling, task‑master household. The conversation then turns to psychosomatic effects of trauma, where she links experiences like constipation and tinnitus to acute stress from abuse and stalking.
- •Her mother refused normal teenage freedoms but allowed traditional ‘work’ like Saturday jobs.
- •Jacqueline eagerly took bar, waitress, and salon jobs from age 14, valuing freedom over school performance.
- •Her academic focus suffered as she prioritized earning and being out of the house.
- •She recalls severe constipation during abuse, later understanding it as a manifestation of trying to maintain control.
- •During a stalking incident years later, she developed debilitating tinnitus—constant marching sounds in her ears—which resolved after several months.
- •She describes a doctor encounter where, as a child, she disclosed abuse and concern for her sister; the doctor asked if she wanted social services and accepted her ‘no’, illustrating past systemic failures.
- 45:40 – 52:40
Consent, Sexual Violence, and Ongoing Educational Gaps
Using her own experiences and recent work, Jacqueline highlights how far society has come in believing victims and talking about sexual abuse—but also how far is left to go, especially around consent education for both women and men.
- •Steven is struck by how unimaginable previous adult responses to child abuse would be today.
- •Jacqueline notes some female university students expect to be assaulted at uni, which shocked her.
- •She recently ran workshops on consent and found widespread confusion and lack of understanding.
- •She argues for much more structured consent education in schools.
- •A trans man she met described experiencing sexism as a woman, then hearing male viewpoints after transitioning, underscoring gendered blind spots.
- •Steven acknowledges many men are naïve about consent and need better education to understand women’s lived experiences.
- 52:40 – 1:01:00
Resilience, Cancer, and the Power of Optimism Bias
Asked what resilience means to her, Jacqueline details her breast cancer journey—from stage 2 to stage 4—and how an almost stubborn optimism bias shaped her reactions and decisions. She treats serious illness like a strategic problem to be solved, not a passive fate.
- •Diagnosed with breast cancer in 2016; husband and sister were distraught, but she immediately focused on a “strategy and plan.”
- •Her first treatment appeared highly successful; she was told there was a 0.1% chance of recurrence.
- •She fell into that 0.1%, with cancer returning as stage 4 and deemed incurable but treatable.
- •She insisted to her consultant that she could be the rare case of cure, reframing odds in her favor.
- •Her mantra: if she can be the 0.1% where things go wrong, she can also be the 0.1% where they go brilliantly.
- •She now lives in “excellent remission,” credits mindset for how she copes, and notes that illness prompted healthier habits and a sharper focus on purpose and empowerment work.
- 1:01:00 – 1:10:40
Optimism in Parenting and Leading Through the Pandemic
Jacqueline shows how her optimism extends from parenting to crisis leadership. She instills a daily ‘I can’ affirmation in her daughter and recounts steering Ann Summers through the Covid‑19 retail shutdown, leveraging communication and creative pivots to survive and grow.
- •She trained her daughter to respond to “I can” with “I know I can” every school morning, to counter shyness and build confidence.
- •Boris Johnson’s announcement to close all non‑essential retail was one of her hardest business days.
- •Initially there was no clarity on furlough, rent relief, or landlord negotiations; many businesses had barely three months’ cash.
- •Ann Summers had 146 stores at peak; closures felt like watching her “baby” being shut down.
- •They rapidly expanded their sales ambassador network from 4,000 to 20,000 in three months via strong social engagement.
- •Novel products like ‘penis pasta’ unexpectedly sold out during lockdown, showcasing necessity‑driven creativity.
- 1:10:40 – 1:26:40
Discovering the Ann Summers Party Model and Reinventing the Brand
Jacqueline recounts how a casual invitation to a clothes party in a Thamesmead council flat sparked the idea of women‑only Ann Summers parties. Listening to women’s discomfort with sex shops and leveraging her own naivety, she built a new, female‑focused business model that would transform both the company and UK sexual culture.
- •She left Royal Doulton seeking a buzzier, more creative environment and joined Ann Summers, then her father’s male‑oriented sex‑shop business.
- •At a Pippa Dee–style clothes party she saw bored housewives candidly discussing relationships and sex, yet too embarrassed to enter sex shops.
- •Women at the party directly asked her to host Ann Summers parties so they could “spice up” their sex lives privately.
- •She piloted parties herself with toys and lingerie from the Tottenham Court Road store; attendees were nervous but excited, talking openly about relationships.
- •She decided parties must be women‑only to preserve a safe, relaxed atmosphere and avoid discomfort from male partners’ presence.
- •She pitched the idea to an all‑male board in grey suits and met outright dismissal, including the infamous line that “women aren’t interested in sex.”
- •Despite skepticism, the board funded small ads; she recruited hosts region by region and used seminars at the Strand Palace Hotel to expand, creating a self‑propagating network.
- •She credits her lack of formal business training with forcing her to listen obsessively to customer feedback instead of copying conventions.
- 1:26:40 – 1:37:40
Sexism, Brand Bias, and the Bullet in the Post
The discussion shifts to institutional resistance and personal danger Jacqueline faced while mainstreaming a sex‑positive, women‑centric brand. Landlords, councils, and officials tried to block her stores; in Dublin, the conflict escalated to public television debates, a court case, and a threatening bullet sent to her.
- •Landlords and shopping centers often refused Ann Summers outright or demanded a name change and back‑street locations.
- •Bromley’s Glades Centre initially pushed for rebranding; many managers said “over our dead body” before eventually accepting the store.
- •Jacqueline pursued a flagship Dublin store on O’Connell Street due to strong party sales; Dublin Corporation pressured her to choose a side street instead.
- •She hosted officials in UK stores to show the brand’s tasteful positioning and empowerment mission, but they remained hostile.
- •On Ireland’s Late Late Show, she was ambushed by a council rep in a good‑cop/bad‑cop setup but won the audience over when a woman rebuked him for dictating where women could shop.
- •Ann Summers was served a writ on opening day; they won damages in court, and the Dublin shop became a top‑three performer and a tourist bus stop.
- •A bullet arrived in the mail a week before she was due in Dublin; she hired security but refused to be bullied into pulling out.
- 1:37:40 – 1:47:00
Being a Young Woman CEO in a Sexist Business World
Jacqueline reflects on becoming CEO in her 20s and the overt and subtle sexism she faced. From being ignored in meetings to being challenged in first‑class train carriages, she illustrates how bias works in the everyday micro‑moments as well as in boardrooms.
- •As a petite, youthful‑looking woman, she was frequently mistaken for a junior and overshadowed by taller colleagues, even female ones.
- •At meetings, people often addressed male colleagues by default, assuming they were the decision‑makers.
- •On a train, a man demanded she prove she had a first‑class ticket, something he hadn’t done to any of the surrounding “city boys.”
- •Other passengers minimized the incident, asking her to “just show” the ticket, illustrating how women are often told to de‑escalate rather than confront sexism.
- •She emphasizes that such obvious incidents are the tip of the iceberg; most discrimination is invisible in compound decisions and opportunities denied.
- •Within her wider group’s early culture, bullying by senior men was normalized as entertainment. She moved quickly to eradicate it and now operates a zero‑tolerance culture.
- 1:47:00 – 1:54:40
Money, Legacy, and Expanding the Definition of ‘Every Woman’
Asked about money’s role in her life, Jacqueline acknowledges financial success as a societal marker but argues her true fulfillment comes from building female financial and sexual empowerment. She describes evolving Ann Summers from serving ‘women’ to consciously representing “every woman” in all her diversity.
- •Early in her career, success was primarily measured by sales and profit; now, she values impact more.
- •The party model and ambassador network have provided financial independence to hundreds of thousands of women, some earning £30,000 per month during lockdown.
- •She sees sexual empowerment—helping women feel safe, informed, and confident in the bedroom—as central to her legacy.
- •Recent campaigns intentionally feature trans women, amputees, slim and curvy bodies, professional models, and customers to represent “every woman.”
- •She feels privileged by her own wealth but more driven by the legacy of empowerment and culture change than by material comforts.
- 1:54:40 – 2:00:40
The Hardest Business Day: Covid and Cash Flow Cliff Edges
Steven presses for the single hardest day in business, and Jacqueline returns to Boris Johnson’s sudden retail closure announcement. She details the fear of running out of cash, the inadequacy of initial government support, and the emotional strain of seeing decades of work suddenly frozen.
- •The closure announcement came without immediate mention of furlough, rates holidays, or structured landlord support.
- •Industry calls revealed many retailers had less than three months’ cash runway.
- •Government CBILS loans initially had only an 80% guarantee, making banks reluctant to lend; many companies were refused credit.
- •She describes months of navigating half‑measures and lifelines that often didn’t apply in practice.
- •Emotionally, it felt like watching her life’s work put in limbo overnight.
- 2:00:40 – 2:06:20
Marriage, Illness, and Emotional Support Gaps
The conversation turns intimate as Steven asks how she maintained her marriage through such crises. Jacqueline distinguishes between her husband’s strong business support and the more uneven emotional support during her illness, shedding light on how partners can struggle with vulnerability and role reversals.
- •She openly says her husband is a wonderful partner but found aspects of her cancer journey hard to handle.
- •He was used to her being strong and resilient; seeing her debilitated and vulnerable challenged him.
- •At points, she lost her hair, had numb feet, nausea, severe fatigue, and even temporary sight issues.
- •She believes many men in similar positions struggle to provide the emotional support seriously ill partners need.
- •In business contexts, however, her husband is “remarkably supportive,” highlighting different comfort zones in emotional vs. practical support.
- 2:06:20 – 2:15:20
IVF, San Francisco, and the Birth of Twins
Jacqueline walks through a harrowing IVF journey, including multiple failed attempts and the culture shock between UK and US clinics. Her eventual successful cycle produced twins, one of whom—Alfie—was diagnosed in utero with a catastrophic brain abnormality.
- •She underwent three unsuccessful IVF attempts in the UK, where everything was framed as “if” and felt negative and conditional.
- •Mandatory counselling sessions culminated in a counsellor criticizing her as “intense,” making the process emotionally tougher.
- •After a two‑year break, she tried again in San Francisco, where the language flipped to “when” and staff were accessible and positive.
- •She and her husband were shocked to learn she was pregnant with twins and chose not to know their sex initially.
- •At an early scan, staff focused on one fetus; later she was told he had alobar holoprosencephaly, meaning only enough brain to live and a “morbid outcome.”
- •Doctors predicted he wouldn’t reach 19 weeks, but he survived to birth, complicating her emotional journey.
- 2:15:20 – 2:26:00
Living and Losing Alfie: Grief, Care, and Family Bonding
Jacqueline describes the complex grief of bonding with a severely disabled son she’d been told would not survive. She details his early life in hospital and at The Children’s Trust, the impact on her marriage, and how Alfie remains part of their family story even after his death at six.
- •She pre‑grieved for Alfie during pregnancy, assuming he would die before birth; his survival shocked her and made initial bonding difficult.
- •The two‑hour trips to hospital with newborn Scarlet were physically and emotionally draining.
- •Moving Alfie to The Children’s Trust in Tadworth allowed more meaningful relationship‑building and high‑quality sensory care.
- •She recalls him being effectively “born in pain,” his first cries not from normal newborn distress but from his condition.
- •The IVF process created tension in her marriage, but caring for Alfie drew them closer and showcased her husband’s strength.
- •She keeps a memory “Pirates box” for Alfie, and he remains central in Scarlet’s life through stories and videos.
- 2:26:00 – 2:37:20
Poisoned by a Nanny: Betrayal Inside the Home
In another almost unbelievable episode, Jacqueline recounts discovering that her trusted nanny had tried to poison her—culminating in screenwash being poured into her soup. The incident shattered her trust and led to a criminal conviction and later an injunction.
- •During the period when Alfie was in care, she hired a live‑in nanny she liked and trusted with her daughter, plus a separate woman to help with cooking.
- •The nanny apparently disliked the cook and attempted to get her sacked by secretly loading meals with sugar, then salt, so food tasted wrong.
- •Jacqueline noticed but initially assumed accidental mistakes; suspicion grew with repeated incidents.
- •One day the nanny delivered her pre‑prepared soup to the office after stopping roadside to pour screenwash into it.
- •Jacqueline took a large sip, tasted chemicals, and spat it out—likely saving her life—and panicked because her daughter was still with the nanny.
- •When confronted with witnesses present, the nanny initially denied it, then confessed, claiming she only wanted the cook fired.
- •The case went to court; the nanny appeared on morning TV seeking sympathy, was sentenced to a year and served three months.
- •After prison she tried to write a book about the events, leading Jacqueline to obtain an injunction; the incident left her questioning if she could ever fully trust again.
- 2:37:20 – 2:48:00
Life Lessons: Courage, Networking, and the Power of People
In closing, Jacqueline distills her life and business lessons for her daughter and listeners. She champions daring, embracing difference, investing in relationships, and recognizing people as the true engine of any business.
- •She tries to live with few regrets but would still choose more courage in certain moments—there is “never enough” of it.
- •She wants her daughter to know she doesn’t have to follow the norm and that being different is positive.
- •She regrets not taking networking seriously earlier; in the UK it was under‑valued when she started, but in the US she saw its power.
- •She notes that every room of strangers represents potential life‑changing opportunities, as illustrated by Steven’s story of meeting an investor in a TV casting queue.
- •She wishes she had fully recognized earlier that people and culture—not just her own ability—are the core drivers of business success.
- •Steven affirms that same realization, saying he once wrongly believed his company’s success was about him rather than the team and culture.
- 2:48:00
Farewell: Silver Linings and a Legacy of Empowerment
The episode ends with a mutual expression of admiration. Steven underscores how Jacqueline always finds a silver lining after recounting extreme misfortunes, and she reiterates her commitment to female empowerment and culture change as her enduring legacy.
- •Steven asks Jacqueline to write a secret question in his guest book for the next guest, creating a through‑line between episodes.
- •He summarizes her story as one of unimaginable adversity met with extraordinary optimism, resilience, and impact.
- •He highlights her role in dismantling sexual stigma and challenging male‑dominated social narratives.
- •Jacqueline says she has genuinely enjoyed the conversation and looks forward to hearing and seeing it.
- •The episode closes on the note that this podcast exists precisely to surface such untold, complex journeys behind public success.
