Big Sean Exclusive: ‘’Anyone Can Become a Star, As Long as You Understand This..’’

Big Sean 0:00 You know how many people told me it was impossible? I remember one of my teachers told me I was throwing my life away when I told her that I was thinking about turning down my full scholarship to rap.

Speaker 0:10 He's a chart-topper.

Jay Shetty 0:11 A cultural icon.

Speaker 0:12 And a Grammy-nominated artist.

Speaker 0:14 Please give it up for Big Sean.

Big Sean 0:16 Thank you so much.

Jay Shetty 0:18 What's the difference between wishing for something and manifesting something?

Big Sean 0:21 Wishing is one thing, but when you put your attention on the intention and add strategy to it, that is how you get to manifesting.

Jay Shetty 0:31 If someone in the audience is feeling a low sense of confidence, what's the first step to building that confidence?

Big Sean 0:38 Everyone comes from different walks of life. There is no real right or wrong in this life. There's only a perspective. Things can hurt you. When you understand yourself more and you appreciate everything you have, you start to understand and you don't take things personally.

Jay Shetty 0:53 You've always been so open about depression and anxiety-

Big Sean 0:57 Mm-hmm

Jay Shetty 0:57 ... in a culture and in an art form that may not always allow for it. How did you find a safe space in doing the career you had and being Big Sean the rapper?

Big Sean 1:08 The commitment I made to myself to being authentic and sharing. And when I started to go to therapy as a Black man, I didn't know it was such a taboo thing.

Jay Shetty 1:17 What do you define success as?

Big Sean 1:19 Whatever you're doing on purpose is your purpose, as long as it's with a purpose.

Speaker 1:26 The number one health and wellness podcast.

Speaker 1:28 Jay Shetty.

Speaker 1:29 Jay Shetty.

Jay Shetty 1:30 The one, the only Jay Shetty. [laughs] I am so pumped to finally share the live interviews from my very first podcast tour presented by Chase Sapphire Reserve. This next one features a powerful conversation with Big Sean at The Met in Philadelphia, one of the most thoughtful and inspiring voices in music. I am so excited to be here tonight live at The Met in Philadelphia with the one and only Big Sean.

Big Sean 1:59 [laughs]

Jay Shetty 1:59 Uh, Sean and I have been friends for quite a while now.

Big Sean 2:03 Yeah.

Jay Shetty 2:03 And I'm so grateful that he's here today to be part of my first-ever On Purpose Tour, and I was so grateful that he let me write the foreword to his beautiful book-

Big Sean 2:13 Yes. Yes

Jay Shetty 2:13 ... Go Higher.

Speaker 2:14 [cheering]

Jay Shetty 2:15 Uh, I saw some in the, in the audience. If you haven't got a copy-

Big Sean 2:18 Yeah. Man

Jay Shetty 2:18 ... I'd love to see it. Love to see it.

Big Sean 2:20 No, thank you. Yeah.

Jay Shetty 2:21 If you haven't got a copy, make sure you go and grab one. Uh, it's, it's truly a beautiful book, and, you know, when I first met Sean, I was shocked as to how much self-work, healing he'd done from the beginning of his journey. This wasn't something he'd come into. It was something he'd inherited and started so much earlier, and it touched me so deeply. But Sean, before we get into that, I wanted to start with what we've been talking about tonight.

Big Sean 2:47 Okay.

Jay Shetty 2:47 And I know you were watching backstage, but we've been talking about this idea about how we're all limited by what we think people think of us.

Big Sean 2:55 Hmm.

Jay Shetty 2:55 And, and I wanted to sh- I wanted you to share if there was a time in your life where you used to be worried about what you thought people thought about you-

Big Sean 3:03 Yeah

Jay Shetty 3:03 ... and how that blocked your creativity and your spirit.

Big Sean 3:06 You know, I used to let the things I can't control, control me. You know what I mean? And it was very conditional. It was something that it's impossible to be successful in the business of pleasing everybody. Like, to something that you might as well let go of now, and if you do please everybody, you're probably not gonna be pleasing yourself. You know what I mean? So I do feel that especially in entertainment and when you get an opportunity to be... You, you gotta understand, like, since I was 10, 11 years old, all I wanted to do was, like, be a rapper. That was, like, the only thing that I, like, wanted. Um, and I did super good in school. I come from, like, a family of scholars. My mom is an English and social studies teacher. My grandma... First of all, my grandma was, like, one of the first female Black captains in World War II, so she was, um...

Speaker 3:57 [cheering]

Big Sean 3:59 Yeah. RIP. And, um, she was, like, in that, uh, the Six Triple Eight, what- that Tyler Perry made a movie about. She was, like, in- a part of the Six Triple Eight.

Speaker 4:07 [cheering]

Big Sean 4:07 So it was quite a... You know, I had quite a grandmother, but she, she, to her, education was the way to a better life. You know what I mean? And my granddad was also in World War II. And so I was somebody who I always did good in school. You know what I mean? Like, just out of respect. And but I always knew that music was what I wanted to do, and I had an opportunity to, like, go to school or to pursue music. I'd go to school on a full scholarship as well, and I chose the music thing. And the, the beautiful thing, though, about my grandmother and my family is that even though I did the opposite, they still supported me. And as a dad now, I see how it- important it is to not control your kids or in that case grandkids, but to support them and to, you know, give them the fuel to, to say, "Hey, you could do anything you wanna do." Like, you know how many people told me it was impossible? I remember one of my teachers told me I was throwing my life away. When I told her that I was thinking about turning down my full scholarship to rap, she was like, "No."

Jay Shetty 5:12 [laughs]

Big Sean 5:12 She was like, "Do not blow it." Like...

Jay Shetty 5:15 [laughs]

Big Sean 5:15 You know? And it took so much faith and so much trust and, you know, that trust, it's like you, the letter U is right in the middle of trust, and you have to trust yourself. It's like you are the one that is, like, right in the middle of that trust. And-

Speaker 5:32 [applause]

Big Sean 5:34 It was just... I can go on and on about the story, but to

Big Sean 5:38 fast-forward a little bit, and that's what this book is. Like, honestly, I'm not trying to sell my book to you guys there. Like, it's not to be a shameless plug, but this book is, like, the wisdom of, like, my whole family, the whole... I was lucky enough to have, like, family members like my mom who introduced me to meditation, introduced me to strategizing, told me, like, "Look, if you really wanna make this happen, visualize it, meditate, close your eyes. Like, write it down, journal it out," you know? And it really-I mean, it really made the world of difference. I would not be s- sitting here talking to Jay Shetty if it wasn't for that, and that's the whole point of writing the book. And when I did my first interview with him, he was like, "Yo, you gotta write a book." [laughs]

Jay Shetty 6:19 [laughs]

Big Sean 6:19 And I was like, "I mean, that's something I wanna do later on," and you realize how fleeting and how not promised life is, and that when you have the wanting of something, when you have the desire ... I don't even like w- using want that much because it acknowledges that I don't have it. I like to think that I already have it. When you have a desire, when you have a passion for something, just do it as

Big Sean 6:44 soon as you can because nothing is promised. We think we have this concept of time like, "Oh, I got till, like, I'm old." Like, that's not al- all the way true, and that's not a bad thing. It's really not a bad thing. It's just, it's as- there's actually beauty in that. So for me, that's what this book is, is just kinda like for people who may not be clear enough to how to get to the next part of their lives, people who may feel stuck, people who ... You know, we all go through the ups and downs of life, and I feel like this book is a great book of strategy to just, you know, something that I can't wait for my son to read or pass on to people, you know? So I'm really thankful for you for helping me do that, man. It means a lot.

Jay Shetty 7:21 Of course, man. [audience cheering]

Big Sean 7:23 Yeah.

Jay Shetty 7:23 I, I felt it, I felt it immediately when we first spoke, and I wanted to ask you the difference because I think-

Big Sean 7:30 Oh, sorry, but I didn't answer your question about controlling, so.

Jay Shetty 7:32 [laughs]

Big Sean 7:33 My bad. I went off a little bit, but let me answer that real quick, quickly too. I won't take, like, too much time. Yes, there are times where I did feel very controlled and trying to do, you know, the idea of what people wanted me to do, and it was very depressing sometimes. And sometimes it worked out. Sometimes it was like, "Oh, thank God I listened to you." But at the same time, it doesn't feel the same as when you just listen to yourself. You gotta let go of the idea of succeeding and not succeeding. You gotta understand that it's all just a part of the, the same journey. It's all like, you know, you may learn more about winning by losing. You know what I mean? It's like if the sun was sunny every day, you wouldn't even appreciate it. It's the storms that make the sun shine so much more. [audience applauding] It's the yin and yang of it. But, uh, it's something that you should definitely keep in mind, you know?

Jay Shetty 8:28 Yeah. I was thinking about it as you were talking. You know, we were talking about dreams earlier and, you know, everyone in this audience has got dreams, got ideas-

Big Sean 8:35 Yeah

Jay Shetty 8:35 ... got visions of what their better life looks like.

Big Sean 8:37 Mm-hmm.

Jay Shetty 8:38 And I wanted to ask you the difference between wishing-

Big Sean 8:42 Mm

Jay Shetty 8:42 ... and manifesting.

Big Sean 8:43 Yeah.

Jay Shetty 8:43 What's the difference? Because I think a lot of people are trying to manifest, but then they're not seeing it.

Big Sean 8:48 Mm-hmm.

Jay Shetty 8:49 And a lot of people might be wishing. So what's the difference between wishing for something, wanting for something, and manifesting something?

Big Sean 8:55 Wow, that's a very good question. I think the difference between wishing something and manifesting something is one is an idea, one is a dream, one is a concept. The other one is everything

Big Sean 9:11 that you've accumulated in action. When you manifest something, you are in the middle of it. You may not even realize it's happening, but I always like to think of, um, the energy of already having it. It's like to me that's the v- that's already manifesting. It's like, it's the difference between being like, you know, "I really want that car," that's like wishing it, to being like, "Man, want ... " Like, the steer ... Like, you, you can, like, smell it. You know what I mean? [audience laughs] When you, when you psych yourself out, because your subconscious mind doesn't know the difference between what's real and what you are feeding it or what's real to you. So that meaning, that being said, when you meditate and you visualize yourself on a beach with your feet in the sand, your subconscious mind, which to me is the relationship between you and God or the universe or whatever you believe in, of manifesting. I ... There's one of these books I read a long time ago, and it was talking about how when you speak, there's these, like, crystals in water, and when you speak to it positively, the crystals become these beautiful looking, like, snowflakes. And when you speak to it negatively, when you say all these, like, "You suck," you know, all these things like that, it like, the crystals, like, look like damaged rocks. So you gotta understand if it has that effect on water, what are we 70% made of? Water, right? So it's really the power. You know, when you manifest something, it's like the power of your subconscious is so important to really focus and feed that. Even if you don't,

Big Sean 10:46 even if you technically, your logical mind doesn't believe it, if you just keep feeding it, you'll see that you're a walking magnet and it's gonna show up in your life one way or another, I promise you. Yeah.

Jay Shetty 10:56 I love that. I love that. I love that insight, and I was thinking about it as well. I feel like manifesting is being in love with the process-

Big Sean 11:05 Mm-hmm

Jay Shetty 11:05 ... and wishing is being in love with the result.

Big Sean 11:08 Ooh, I love that. [audience cheering]

Jay Shetty 11:09 And so when you're manifesting, right, like, when, when you're manifesting, it's what you said. You can smell the car.

Big Sean 11:16 Mm-hmm.

Jay Shetty 11:16 You're thinking about the work you're gonna have to do to get it.

Big Sean 11:19 Yeah.

Jay Shetty 11:19 You're dreaming about waking up every day and putting in the time because you know where it's going, but you're obsessed with the process.

Big Sean 11:25 The process.

Jay Shetty 11:26 And, and wishing is just like, "I can't wait till I have it. I wish I had it. Why did they have it? I don't have it. They don't deserve it," and it becomes all about the end. And the problem with that is it just feels further and further and further away-

Big Sean 11:40 Yeah

Jay Shetty 11:41 ... and out of reach, right?

Big Sean 11:42 Yeah, especially when you don't put a strategy to the wishing. And I think once you put the strategy to the wishing and the attention on your intention, that's what turns it from wishing to manifesting.

Jay Shetty 11:52 Mm.

Big Sean 11:53 Yeah.

Jay Shetty 11:53 Say that again. That was good.

Big Sean 11:54 [laughs]

Jay Shetty 11:55 That was good. That was ... You said it too fast. Like a rapper.

Big Sean 11:57 I don't know. I forgot what I said, honestly.

Jay Shetty 11:58 You were rapping. You were rapping it.

Big Sean 11:59 Yeah. No, I w-

Jay Shetty 11:59 It was the attention and the in-

Big Sean 12:01 I was ... No, I wa- Yeah, I was saying that, you know, wishing is one thing, but when you put your attention on the intention and add strategy to it-That is how you get to manifesting. That's the process. [audience cheering]

Jay Shetty 12:14 I love that, yeah.

Big Sean 12:15 Yeah.

Jay Shetty 12:16 That's... Everyone write that down. Intention-

Big Sean 12:18 [laughs]

Jay Shetty 12:19 ... attention-

Big Sean 12:20 [laughs]

Jay Shetty 12:20 ... and strategy or action. Like, adding those three things together, that's manifesting.

Big Sean 12:25 Yeah.

Jay Shetty 12:25 Intention, attention, and strategy and action, that's manifesting if you're trying to build something in your life.

Big Sean 12:31 Sometimes when you're in a relationship, you lose parts of yourself, and you guys kinda become this one thing together. You shut off certain parts of yourself, and, like, this gets shut down, and that gets shut down. And you're kinda just a fraction maybe of, like, the person you were. When you recognize that and you split from someone and you turn on all these other parts of yourself and you're, like, the full version of you, I think that is the best version to bring to a relationship. You know, it shouldn't be one half make a whole. It should be two wholes make something greater.

Jay Shetty 13:04 Sean, what I love about you is that you've always been so open about depression and anxiety-

Big Sean 13:10 Mm-hmm

Jay Shetty 13:10 ... in a culture and in a art form that may not always allow for it.

Big Sean 13:16 Right.

Jay Shetty 13:16 Like, generally, you think of hip-hop and rap and music in general to be, like, on your side, to be

Jay Shetty 13:21 tough, to be strong.

Big Sean 13:23 Right.

Jay Shetty 13:23 You know, you're battle rapping.

Big Sean 13:24 Mm-hmm.

Jay Shetty 13:25 It's, it's bravado. It's... You know, and I love hip-hop, you know that.

Big Sean 13:28 Yeah, of course.

Jay Shetty 13:29 But there's that energy to it because a lot of people here are also looking for their voice to have a space to feel vulnerable.

Big Sean 13:36 Mm-hmm.

Jay Shetty 13:37 Like a lot of people earlier were saying, "We're so grateful that this is a space we can be vulnerable." Sometimes when you go to work, sometimes when you go to your family, you don't have a space-

Big Sean 13:45 Right

Jay Shetty 13:46 ... to be vulnerable. So what was-

Big Sean 13:47 Mm.

Jay Shetty 13:48 How did you find a safe space when it wasn't easy in doing the career you had and being Big Sean the rapper? How did you do that? Where did you find that space? How did you-

Big Sean 13:58 Well, I don't think it was a safe space. I just looked at it as, like... It was like, for me, it was just the commitment I made to myself to being real, to just, like, being authentic and sharing. You know, when someone asked me about it and, you know, when I was going through those ups and downs, like, expressing that on a song, you know, especially the song I Have Deep Reverence with me and Nipsey Hussle, to the late, great Nipsey Hussle, RIP. Um. [audience applauds] Just being open about it, and I didn't know it was such a taboo thing as a Black man, as, like, any of that. Like, ta- even talking about, like, therapy, um, my dad... So my dad, he's from Monroe, Louisiana, and he used-

Jay Shetty 14:40 Whoo

Big Sean 14:40 ... to get caught on the wro- Yeah, shout out to Louisiana. Okay, yeah. [laughs] He would get caught on the wrong side of the train tracks and get beat bad for it sometimes. You know, it was i- in a, around the civil rights time, like, real bad times down there for him sometimes. And he even had a speech impediment. Like, he had a stutter when he was growing up that he was able to overcome. But my point being is that when I started to go to therapy, it inspired him to go to therapy, and he was like, "I didn't know... No one told me." You know, one of the things he said, and I didn't really... It means so much. He was like, "Man, I love learning from... It's awesome when I can learn from my son." And now that I have a son, he teaches me. s- he's only two years old, but I learn so much from him. I just, I just feel like that that's how the natural progression of it goes. You know what I mean? But when I've initially shared, like, how I was feeling, I don't know if it was what s- a quote, unquote, "a safe space." It just, it's just the, the route I chose to go, you know?

Jay Shetty 15:37 Yeah, it just needs to come out.

Big Sean 15:38 Yeah, it just needs to come out.

Jay Shetty 15:39 So sometimes, sometimes what you're saying is don't wait for a safe space-

Big Sean 15:44 Mm-hmm

Jay Shetty 15:44 ... because it may never come.

Big Sean 15:46 It may never come.

Jay Shetty 15:46 And so you just gotta kinda create a space where you can start talking about it. Who was the first person you opened up to deeply-

Big Sean 15:56 Mm

Jay Shetty 15:56 ... about it? Do you remember that? Was it a therapist, or was it someone else? You know-

Big Sean 15:59 It was my mom. It was my mom, um, 'cause we... As close as I am to her, like, me and her s- relationship, like, started taking a real terrible dive when I was, um, just of some... Like, overdoing it with my career, meaning that, like, I gave up all my hobbies. I was just, like, strictly working because the concept when you come from a city like Philadelphia or, like, or a city like Detroit, it's like, "Oh, you gotta stay on they necks. You gotta stay hot. You can't let the opportunity slip away. You can't be one of those people that almost..." You know, and even though it was like, "Oh, you have a number one album, another number one album," this, that, like, it just never felt like it was all the way locked in, and I think that's because I was looking at it the wrong way, and I'll come back to that. But I remember just burning myself out, and I was on tour in Europe. And I'm not gonna say who, but somebody came up to me-

Jay Shetty 16:56 [laughs]

Big Sean 16:57 ... and was like, "Man, you should try Adderall," right? And I was like, "Okay." I never wasn't really familiar with Adderall like that. He's like, "Oh, you know, college students do it." Like, he was li- I'm a very smart person, too, and he was like, "It's just some, like, salts and thing." I'm like... I wanted to believe him, and I took it. And, you know, I'm not prescribed it. Like, I don't need it, uh, per se. And I was able to get more work done, though. I was, like, able to get more, and I was pushing myself more. And I noticed that it was, like, really tearing my insides up. Like, I looked like I was on drugs. You know what I'm saying? Like, hardcore. Like, I looked like s- just not myself. And anyway, I kept doing it because it was working. I was seeing results. I was getting the work done. I had another number one album. I was able to finish it and do another project with, you know, with Jhené, and we did a side project and then another album. And I was just like... And then I did another album that same year with Metro Boomin, and it was just, like, all of these things. But I really paid the price when I hit, like, rock bottom. And I went to the studio, and I realized when I didn't have Adderall, I felt like I couldn't do it. I couldn't make music without it, and that's when I realized I have a problem. I was like, "I have a huge problem," and I stopped it immediatelyAnd I couldn't think of anything, and the depression, you know, I didn't realize that the synthetic dopamine that was being created in my brain from that, when you shut it off, when you have a synthetic version of it, your bo- your brain start, stops making natural dopamine. So you're totally screwed. I'm talking about you are like ... I, like, had a gun to my head. I was, like, ready to blow ... You know, I had, like, my dream house in Beverly Hills. I had all these things, like beautiful, a beautiful life, um, unimaginable, and I wanted to take it away because my mind was really playing tricks on me and had me thinking that I was someone that I wasn't. And that's when I opened up to my mom, and I had not been talking to her because I felt like I didn't deserve, I felt like I didn't deserve to talk to my family. It was the weirdest psychological twisted games I was playing with myself. And I remember she suggested all these things, like, you know, a good mom does, and she ended up coming out and spending time with me, and, like, helped building me back up, and that's when I really started s- realizing how connected the body is with the spirit and with the mind. And, you know, I started working out. I started seeing a therapist. I started slowly getting back into music. I had to, I had to literally let go of everything I was doing because just taking a phone call, just taking a meeting was just too much for

Big Sean 19:38 me, and I, I crashed out. That was when I realized how bad I needed to change my life. And I think we all kinda come to a point in our lives where we go through that in o- in our own ways. It's, like, late 20s, early 30s, maybe late 30s, and you probably, probably a few times in your life where this happens to where it feels like you're gonna ... a wall is gonna fall on you, and you either have to climb over it or you're gonna get crushed by it, you know? Um, and it really feels that life or death. And, um, therapy helped me so much. Being able to talk through with someone and unload that amount of emotion and that amount of reality helped because sometimes when you do it with your friend or your family member, it stays between y'all. And then it's like, well, shit, they're going through their own stuff, you know what I'm saying? And it's kinda awkward, you know-

Jay Shetty 20:31 [laughs]

Big Sean 20:31 ... when you get to, like, spilling your deepest secrets or, like, "Mom, I had a gun to my head," you know, I don't wanna, like, talk to her about that. And, um, it took me some time, but you know what? I believed. I had faith in myself. I trusted myself, and that was, that was one of the deepest time where I had to connect with my s- my spiritual self, my faith. And I have a great relationship with Jesus Christ and with the, with God, and [audience cheering] [audience clapping] and a great relationship with myself. You know, I rediscovered myself. I tried new hobbies. I was, like, jumping out of airplanes and, like, going to the gun range and just trying all new things that I hadn't tried before and really watching anime. Like, I'm a huge, like, anime lover. [audience cheering] And I just connected back with myself, you know?

Jay Shetty 21:20 Thank you for going there with the depths of ... Yeah, go for it. Absolutely.

Big Sean 21:23 Yeah. Thank you. [audience cheering]

Jay Shetty 21:24 Go for it. You don't gotta be silent. I love doing this with you. I feel like I should do every podcast with a live audience. This is-

Big Sean 21:31 Yeah.

Jay Shetty 21:31 This i- I just wanna take a moment to say how much this means to me because usually I spend my time with a camera or when we're in the studio, and we've recorded-

Big Sean 21:40 Right

Jay Shetty 21:40 ... multiple times in our studio together. But sharing this with all of you and having all of your energy here is giving me energy, so I just wanna say thank you to you all for-

Big Sean 21:49 Yeah. For sure

Jay Shetty 21:50 ... for, so laugh, clap, cry, whatever you want. Like, that's what this is for.

Big Sean 21:54 Yeah.

Jay Shetty 21:54 Uh, uh, you're, you're a part of this, and-

Big Sean 21:56 You know, one thing I do wanna say, not to cut you off, Jay, is that, you know, I, I was just looking at your mic, and it's on purpose, and one of the things people always ask me, and I wanna ask you this question, too: How do I find my purpose?

Speaker 22:10 I love you, Jay.

Big Sean 22:12 I love you too, Jay.

Jay Shetty 22:13 [laughs] I love you too.

Big Sean 22:14 How do I find my purpose? How would you answer that?

Jay Shetty 22:17 I'm gonna share a meditation later that I believe will do that.

Big Sean 22:20 Mm.

Jay Shetty 22:20 But in order to give a, a s- a spoken answer that doesn't come through within, I would say that your passion is for you and service is for others. And so when you use your passion in the service of others, it becomes a purpose.

Big Sean 22:40 Mm.

Jay Shetty 22:40 So when you have something that you're passionate about- [audience cheering]

Big Sean 22:43 Mm-hmm

Jay Shetty 22:44 ... right? When you have something you're passionate about, could be anything, when you have something that you're deeply passionate about and then you use it to improve other people's lives-

Big Sean 22:54 Mm-hmm

Jay Shetty 22:54 ... that's what a purpose is. But a purpose doesn't have to be your job.

Big Sean 22:58 Mm.

Jay Shetty 22:58 It doesn't have to be what you do every day. It doesn't have to make you money. It doesn't have to make you famous. It doesn't have to get you followers.

Big Sean 23:06 Say that.

Jay Shetty 23:06 Your purpose can be something you do on the evenings and weekends.

Big Sean 23:10 Mm-hmm.

Jay Shetty 23:10 Your purpose can be something to do that you do, take care of your children. [audience cheering] Your, your purpose can be so many things.

Big Sean 23:15 Yeah.

Jay Shetty 23:16 And I think we limit ourselves because the world today ... You think about this for a second. Maybe, like, 50 to 100 years ago, no one would have asked the question, "What do you do?" as the main question-

Big Sean 23:29 [laughs]

Jay Shetty 23:29 ... of conversation.

Big Sean 23:30 Right.

Jay Shetty 23:30 Today, that's the number one question because who we are defines our worth. We live at a time where you say your career, and it defines who you are and what your worth is in society, but that's not how God designed us.

Big Sean 23:44 Mm-mm.

Jay Shetty 23:44 That's not how the community designed us.

Big Sean 23:46 Mm-mm.

Jay Shetty 23:47 In the past, you'd be a farmer and a storyteller.

Big Sean 23:49 Yeah. That's right.

Jay Shetty 23:50 Right?

Big Sean 23:50 Right.

Jay Shetty 23:50 You'd be a mom and a, and a doctor. You'd be a carer, and you'd be a whatever else it is. And so I think we need to look at our purposes, and this and that, and stop thinking of our purpose as a job title. Stop thinking of our purpose as a promotion. Stop thinking of our purpose as, you know, what does our biography say on Instagram? Like, because I, I really don't like it when everyone's like, "So what do you do?" And I'm like, I don't wanna say podcaster. There's a million podcasters doing different things.

Big Sean 24:19 Mm. Mm-hmm.

Jay Shetty 24:20 I'm an author, but that's not who I am. That's not my purpose.

Big Sean 24:23 Right.

Jay Shetty 24:23 Same as you. You're an author.

Big Sean 24:25 Yeah.

Jay Shetty 24:25 You're a rapper. You're an entrepreneur. You're a father.

Big Sean 24:27 Yeah. Some-

Jay Shetty 24:28 Right?

Big Sean 24:28 ... people ask me, like, "What's y- how do you find your purpose?"It took me a while to answer it. That was an amazing answer by the way, man. [audience cheering] That's like right on. And I think a lot of people

Big Sean 24:43 tie their purpose in with their career, right? They'll be like, "Well, I gotta find my purpose 'cause I gotta find my way. I gotta find out how to..." You know what I mean? And I realize that your purpose is what you're doing on purpose, with purpose. It doesn't have to be, yeah, like you say, your job. That's a... It can be. There's no outlines to it. It can be. Your job can be your purpose. Your hobby can be your purpose. In fact, I feel like one of my purposes is to be an, a son. One of my purposes is to be a father, whatever it is, because it's whatever I'm doing on purpose is my purpose. You feel what I'm saying? Like, it doesn't have to be so defined. [audience applauding] And that's, that's one thing that-

Jay Shetty 25:27 Absolutely. Absolutely. I'm so glad you brought that up-

Big Sean 25:30 Mm-hmm

Jay Shetty 25:30 ... because I feel like there's a lot of pressure around that word as well now-

Big Sean 25:34 It is

Jay Shetty 25:34 ... because it's got linked to our careers, it's got linked to our jobs.

Big Sean 25:37 A lot of pressure around purpose, huh? [laughs]

Jay Shetty 25:39 There's a lot of pressure around purpose and, and it shouldn't be that way because you're absolutely right that your purpose today could just be to be present.

Big Sean 25:49 It could be-

Jay Shetty 25:49 That could be your purpose-

Big Sean 25:50 ... to be present

Jay Shetty 25:50 ... for today.

Big Sean 25:51 Whatever makes you happy, whatever you're doing that you feel in your heart, whatever makes you smile, whether, you know, going to the movies could be your pur- Who knows? Like, whatever it is that, that does it for you, that... Whatever you're doing on purpose is your purpose, as long as it's with a purpose.

Jay Shetty 26:09 Sean, I was thinking about as we were talking about that you've been talking about being a father-

Big Sean 26:12 Mm-hmm

Jay Shetty 26:13 ... and I wanted to ask you, it feels like it's had a big healing impact on you.

Big Sean 26:17 Mm-hmm.

Jay Shetty 26:17 And I feel like it's got you to up level.

Big Sean 26:20 It's had a lot of impacts on me.

Jay Shetty 26:21 [laughs]

Big Sean 26:21 Yeah, for sure. You know. I have a two-and-a-half-year-old, so I don't know if anyone knows what that's like. [audience cheering] He's the sweetest, ame- most amazing kid. He's like a enlightened being, you know what I mean? So he teaches me all these things without trying. Uh, so I'm just... I'm appreciative of him. I'm embracing the unknown because as he keeps growing, he keeps surprising me, so I don't know what it's gonna be like. He's only two... I can't believe we're only two and a half years in. It seems like he's... I, I can't even hardly remember what it was like without him at this point, so-

Jay Shetty 26:55 Yeah

Big Sean 26:56 ... you know, that's how b- much of a presence he is in all our lives, for sure.

Jay Shetty 27:00 I wanna shift the question that people usually ask, especially young kids, going back to our previous conversation about purpose. People are always like, "Oh, what do you want him to be when he grows up? What do you want him to do?"

Big Sean 27:10 [laughs]

Jay Shetty 27:10 And I wanna shift it. I wanna ask you the question: What quality, if you could choose one quality that you really want Noah to have when he grows up, what would you want that quality to be?

Big Sean 27:19 His confidence. He has so much confidence. That's something that I had to gain along the way. You know, my parents came from two families that they didn't really have the confidence growing up. They didn't give me the confidence 'cause they didn't have it. They would al- Like, I'm confident that I will always have whatever it is I need to be the person that I strive to be. I will always have enough. It's abund- There's enough for all of us, and that was a concept where growing up, my mom and my dad both were like, "Oh, you gotta work real hard. F- You know, money, oh, money doesn't grow on trees, you know. It's, uh, it's not fair out here," you know. These are the type of things that they would tell me, and that's not true. That is an experience, and they have also learned that that is actually not true. I know all these sayings sometimes, like, stick with us, right? Like, money doesn't grow on trees, this and that, and you know.

Big Sean 28:18 I saw my mom crying over these bills and, you know, me crying and, you know, growing up and it motivated me, but one of the things they would always tell me, like even when I got my license, my mom was like, "Make sure, like, you take your hat off. Make sure you wear your hat to the, um, front, you know. When the police officer... If you get pulled over, make sure you have both hands on the wheel," you know. And these are things that a mother should tell a Black man in America, especially in a city like Detroit, you know? And so I understood it, and there's a lot that comes with that, but I think that I had to gain my confidence. And one thing that he has is his confidence, and I'm just so proud of him for that. And, like, he is literally the evolution. That's why it's important for you to work on yourselves for your family members. Even whether you have kids or not, your energy is contagious. It's gonna spread to your group of friends, your work group, your family, your kids. And especially when you have a family, it's like your DNA is like a computer chip. It, like, has all this information in it, right? So it's like, it's important to heal your trauma 'cause you passing it on. It's important to heal your gut and your liver and all these things because you're passing, you're genetically passing everything on. They're the, they're parts of you and your partner combined, right? So I always looked at that and it taught... That's one of the things my son taught me is that, okay, he'll smile like my grandmother or he'll smile like Janae's grand... You know, it's like little things like that, and I realized that my grandparents... I always... One of the things with having a kid, I was like, "Man, I wish I could talk to my granddad and, like, ask him for advice. I wish I could talk to my grand..." You know, all these people that aren't here anymore, and I realize I can because the information is in my DNA. I just have to go within-

Jay Shetty 30:13 Mm

Big Sean 30:14 ... and really lock in, and the answer is there, you know. And that's something to always remember, that we always think that the answers are out there, but really the answers most of the time are right where you are. That's what-

Jay Shetty 30:28 That's true.

Big Sean 30:28 That's actually the concept of "The Alchemist," one of my favorite books as well. [audience cheering]

Jay Shetty 30:31 Yeah, that's true.

Big Sean 30:32 I love that. Yeah.

Jay Shetty 30:33 That's real.

Big Sean 30:34 Yeah.

Jay Shetty 30:34 That's so powerful.

Big Sean 30:35 Mm-hmm.

Jay Shetty 30:35 You just gave me chills when you said that, that idea that-We always wish we could talk to this person or that person, but their history lives within us

Big Sean 30:44 Yeah

Jay Shetty 30:44 That's a really, really powerful idea because-

Big Sean 30:46 That's why when you- when people say, "Well, I'm living through you," you know, that's something my dad always says, he really... That's for real ta- that's real talk

Jay Shetty 30:54 People are living with us and living through us at all times

Big Sean 30:56 Mm-hmm. Yeah

Jay Shetty 30:57 And that's why we gotta be so mindful as to what we pass on. If someone in the audience is feeling a low sense of confidence, low sense of self-esteem, a, a low sense of even self-worth, maybe they've been told they're not worth anything, maybe they've been made to feel like they're not enough, what's the first step to building that confidence as an adult? Like you said with your child, he, he already has it. Noah already has it.

Big Sean 31:22 Mm-hmm.

Jay Shetty 31:22 You had to build it over time. I had to build it over time, too.

Big Sean 31:25 Mm-hmm.

Jay Shetty 31:25 What was that first step in building real, true, deep confidence?

Big Sean 31:30 The first step was to understand that everyone is going through something. Everyone has a story. Everyone has a condition. So I remember when I was, uh, 19 years old, and it was a transitional time where I decided to do music and turn down my scholarship, right? And a year had gone by, and I was a depressed person. It was my first battle of depression because things weren't going my way yet. It was God's timing, but, you know, you try and control the timing of life, and it's like, good luck with that. So anyway, I remember I stopped to pump some gas at a place my mom told me never to stop, and I was visiting my girlfriend at the time that went to Michigan State. And on the way from Detroit to Michigan State, there's a place called Howell, Michigan, and it's, like, one of the KKK, like, it's, like, one of their headquarters. Like, not too far from Detroit, which is the, one of the Blackest cities in Am- it's, like, crazy, right? Juxtaposition. I saw the, the exit, and I had to get gas, and it was like, you know when you see the gas station right off the freeway, and it's like, "I could... I'll be straight if I just go right here and pump gas." And I got... Immediately, I got off, and I pulled up to the gas station, and, like, this pickup truck pulls up, and they're like, "You nigga, you nigga." I was like, "What?" Like, I, I was like... It, it had me, like, super... Just like, damn. Like, for real? Like, that, that's where we at? Like, this is 2000 and whatever, you know. So I'm like, "For real?" Like, I, I thought it was, like, a joke almost. And later on, as I was learning more about myself, I'm like, I don't know what type, what type of stuff they had going on, like, what their upbringing was like, what their parents are like, what... They could've been abused. They could've just not understood the concept and understood who I am as a person, right? So

Big Sean 33:25 it takes a lot of growth, but my point is to say, how do you build confidence in yourself? Because that's a moment where my confidence got beat to the ground. I felt, like, crazy, inferior almost, you know? How you build your confidence up is you start to understand, and you don't take things personal. Don't take things personal. You don't let things... Things can hurt you. You can s-see, obviously, I'm, like, still emotional about that time because it was such a pivotal moment for me. It's not because it's hurtful to me. It's because it was a pivotal moment in my development as a man that nothing like that could ever affect me anymore because I understand that everyone comes from different walks of life. You feel me? They don't think they're wrong. They think they're right. As wrong as it is to me, I had to realize that there is no real right or wrong in this life. There's only a perspective. You know what I'm saying? So- [audience applauding] From my perspective, I think it's wrong, right? But not from theirs. But point is, when you understand yourself more, and you appreciate everything you have, and you start building up yourself mentally, when you start to understand that, okay, some people will just talk smack about you for retweets or for whatever or for... to be funny, you don't take things as personal, and that builds up your confidence when you get to know yourself more and more and when you know that you are unstoppable. We have the power of a whole universe in us. I say that because when you look at it, you think of all the stars in the sky. That's exactly how all our atoms are in our cells, in our bodies. They make up this, like, magical type of miracle that's going on in us, right? That we have, like, completely taken for granted, but it's like we have what it takes to create anything. We're, like, products of God. God is in all of us, right? So just remember that, that you do, you can, you will, you know? If that's what you believe, you will make it happen, whatever it is, whatever. [audience applauding] Nothing is off limits. If it, if it was off limits, you wouldn't even think it. You wouldn't even... It wouldn't even be a thought to you. Just wanna get that out there.

Jay Shetty 35:42 Yeah, I love that. I love that take on confidence because I believe confidence comes from noticing how many hard things you've done and how many hard things you've been through. Like that moment you just spoke about, that's not an easy moment to live through.

Big Sean 35:57 Mm-mm.

Jay Shetty 35:58 And, and like you said, I can see the emotion in your eyes, and I think everyone can feel it, but it's like, when you notice that... See, since we were young, we were only taught in school to notice what you did well, what you got right. You weren't taught to notice how you did hard things. And I promise you, in this room, each and every one of you has already done ridiculously hard things. Maybe you lived through the death of a loved one. Maybe you lived through a divorce. Maybe you found yourself after a breakup. Maybe you were broke and found yourself out of that, or maybe you're in it right now, in one of those transition moments. And I've found that those moments of painUnlock your greatest potential Mm-hmm ... because when you can see yourself at that moment and you can see that you've lived through it, so start collecting, start noticing how many difficult, hard things you've done. I remember, uh, I don't think I've talked about this before. I remember my mom saying something crazy to me. I was going through a really hard time in my early 30s, and a really, really tough time, and I was on the phone to her, and my mom does not say motivational things to me. [laughs] My mom doesn't say demotivational things to me, but she doesn't say motivational things to me. Mm-hmm. And my mom doesn't give me advice. I don't go to my mom for advice. I, I love my mom, and I tell her I love

Jay Shetty 37:20 her, and she tells me she loves me and just wants to know what I ate for dinner, right? Like, that, that's my relationship with my mom. And she- Well, that's the way of her saying she loves you, right? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And she loves me to bits. Like- There you go ... she, she loves me. Her love has been a shield in my life. Mm. But I'm on the phone to her and she's like, "How's things going?" And I'm like, m- you know, barely vulnerable with my mom, and I was like, "Mom, you know what? It's just a tough time, you know? But I've got my head down, I'm working hard." And she said to me, "Well, you, well, you're used to dealing with stress." And I said, "What do you mean? Like, you never said this to me before. Like, when did you become a motivational speaker? Like, what do you mean?" [laughs] And, and, and she goes, she goes, "You've been used to dealing with stress." And I was like, "What do you mean? Like, you've never said that to me before." And I never share my stresses with my mom, like you said. Like- Right ... she's not the person I'm talking to. Mm-hmm. And she goes, "Well, y- you dealt with so much stress even when you were in my womb," like, 'cause of what I was living through at the time. She said that to me, and I was like, I was half in tears- Mm. .. the other half was, like, full of, like, confidence. It was, like, one of these moments of just, like, as if, like, my whole self had just, like, locked back in together. And obviously I don't have any memory of that. No. I was a fetus. Of course, yeah. Yeah, right? Yeah. And it's like, but what's really fascinating is you've done hard things even when you don't remember them and you don't know that. Mm-hmm. And it's so important to remind yourself, and it's so im- important to remind the people you love that they've done hard things. Because when you realize you've done hard things, you can do harder things in the future. You find confidence within them. So please, today, look back at the things you've broken through, things you've worked on, the hardships you've been through, and s- and celebrate your resilience as a human. You don't need to wait to become strong. You already are. Yeah. Embrace it. Right? Embrace it, yeah. You already are. Yeah. Embrace it. Mm-hmm. Embrace it. Mm-hmm. I wanna... Oh, thank you. [audience applauding] I wanna pivot slightly. This is something we've been trialing, and it's been beautiful. And this is a real opportunity, so only say yes, only raise your hand if, if you really wanna honor this opportunity. We've been talking about stop caring what people think. We've been talking about doing hard things. We've been talking about becoming more confident. We've been talking about taking your moment. Seeing as we have one of the greatest of all time, one of the best- [laughs] ... Big Sean on the stage, I wanted to ask you all, if there's, and I mean this for real, if you truly, truly mean it, if there's a spoken word artist, a poet, a rapper in the audience who wants to come on stage for 60 seconds and spit some bars for us-

Speaker 39:49 [cheering]

Jay Shetty 39:49 ... so that we can experience their greatness. If you really want this opportunity to be your moment, I want you to raise your hand. If there's truly a poet or a spoken word artist, I'm looking at the back. Is there anyone at the back? Stand up if you're at the back. Yes, he's saying hi. I'm just looking around.

Speaker 40:04 [cheering]

Jay Shetty 40:04 Stand up at the back. Anyone at the back?

Speaker 40:07 [cheering]

Jay Shetty 40:09 There's one there. Anyone else? I just wanna make sure. Yeah, I see someone up there who's standing up. I wanna get someone from the top who has... Is there someone back there? At the top, yeah. Only if you're gonna honor the opportunity. Don't, don't steal the opportunity from anyone. You're pointing at him? Come on down. Come on down. Yeah.

Speaker 40:27 [cheering]

Jay Shetty 40:28 You know, Philly has, like, some of the best musicians. That's what I thought.

Speaker 40:32 [cheering]

Jay Shetty 40:33 That's what I thought. Of all time. Of all time. I wanted to- You know?

Speaker 40:37 Okay. Um, this is about being in a bad relationship.

Speaker 40:43 [cheering]

Speaker 40:44 So, a real bad one. Okay, here we go.

Speaker 40:46 Whoo.

Speaker 40:46 All right. Why do I still love you when you throw beer in my face?

Jay Shetty 40:50 Mm.

Speaker 40:50 When I feel like you don't listen or care what I have to say. Why do I still want you even though you blame it all on me? When you send me brutal messages and constantly threaten to leave.

Speaker 41:03 Whoo.

Speaker 41:03 Why is it I miss you when all we seem to do is fight? Why is it still you I want laying next to me at night? Why do you come to me with your issues when I can't come to you with mine? It's because you listen to idiots all day with their preoccupations and whining. This was a therapist. Um, [laughs] why is it always my fault when I know you play a role, too? Why am I always begging, and why can't, for once, it just be you? Oftentimes I wanna give up and just throw the towel in, but I don't, and I love you, but not enough to wish I didn't.

Jay Shetty 41:36 Ah.

Speaker 41:39 [cheering]

Jay Shetty 41:41 All right. Thank you, everyone.

Speaker 41:42 Thank you.

Jay Shetty 41:42 Give it up for Monica, everyone.

Speaker 41:44 [cheering]

Jay Shetty 41:49 Someone's asking for one more, so let's go. How you feeling, Justin?

Speaker 41:53 I'm feeling good.

Jay Shetty 41:54 Yeah?

Speaker 41:55 Just very nervous.

Jay Shetty 41:56 Of course. That's understandable. That's okay.

Speaker 41:59 I listen to your podcast, so I also, I like to motivate people.

Speaker 42:04 Whoo. [clapping]

Jay Shetty 42:04 Okay. Thank you so much.

Speaker 42:07 'Cause in life we're supposed to inspire those that need to be inspired, and everybody needs to be inspired. You know, we all go through life having problems and trauma and issue, but deep down inside, God is there.

Speaker 42:20 Whoo. [clapping]

Speaker 42:20 And I'm nervous on stage, but every time I used to get on stage, there was always nervousness. And someone that deals with ADHD and bipolar and, you know, that's a survivor of many things, every single one of y'all out there are special, and y'all have something inside of you.

Speaker 42:40 [cheering]

Speaker 42:41 And I also rap.

Big Sean 42:45 I got a little bit something. Stay focused, I'm never hopeless. Everything I do, I move with motion. Should've bought a ocean, pills and potions. What's all the commotion? Thought we were moving, let's go. This is past tense. This is my manuscript in Vesto, like Michelangelo. I said hello. Picture

Big Sean 43:08 me, I said sit down by the lake. Plant me by the sea, deeply loving the rain from above. So my mom and dad, I love you. We had some fallouts, but I had no doubts that this is the light that God has called me to. I'm making new revenue with the old and the new.

Jay Shetty 43:29 Yeah. Give it up for Justin, everyone. [audience cheering]

Big Sean 43:34 Way up, I feel blessed. Yes.

Jay Shetty 43:39 Uh, amazing courage to come up here and, and go through that. It's, it's nerve-wracking when you actually get up here and you see everyone, and-

Big Sean 43:48 Yeah

Jay Shetty 43:49 ... you look around and, you know, you can't find it in your phone and that's, that's the reality.

Big Sean 43:56 Yeah, it is.

Jay Shetty 43:56 You know, that's the reason why I wanted to do that, and we've done it at a couple of shows this week, is it's the reality because the first time you do it, it's never gonna be perfect.

Big Sean 44:05 Mm-hmm.

Jay Shetty 44:05 You know? Like, you're gonna be shaking. You're gonna have your phone where you can't find it. You're gonna be scared of the mic. You're gonna be worried. Like, that's the reality, and the beauty is people just feel your spirit.

Big Sean 44:17 Mm-hmm.

Jay Shetty 44:18 Right? People just feel your energy. I think you felt that when you heard Morgan. You could relate to what she was doing. It was beautiful.

Big Sean 44:24 Mm-hmm.

Jay Shetty 44:25 And, and even with Justin-

Big Sean 44:26 I really lo- I really love this concept she was saying too. Like, first of all, you wrote a whole book on, you know, relationships and love and pertaining to that, and I wanted to ask you, when you are per se in a relationship with someone, right, that isn't beneficial for you, right? And it could be abusive in some ways de- depending on how you look at it. Like, you know, how Morgan was describing her poem, like what advice would you give to anyone who is dealing with a relationship of that, that they just can't seem to shake? And you know, the funny thing about that is like, she even said it in her poem that as bad as it is and you separate, it's like you keep craving it back, and I wonder why that is. Like, why do you keep craving it? Why do you only remember the good things? Why do you kinda like put all the red flags to the side? And you know, I feel like that's a great question to ask you.

Jay Shetty 45:16 [laughing]

Big Sean 45:17 Yeah. [laughing]

Jay Shetty 45:19 Thanks for that, Sean.

Big Sean 45:20 What, what advice-

Jay Shetty 45:20 I appreciate it.

Big Sean 45:22 [laughing] Not in that-

Jay Shetty 45:24 No, I-

Big Sean 45:24 I didn't mean it like that, you know? [laughs]

Jay Shetty 45:25 No, no, no. You know, when I think it comes to love, the hard part is we all wanna be seen. Sometimes the tough part is... This is the truth, actually. I'm gonna, I'm gonna go a bit deep on this 'cause I, I feel you deserve it, and I feel you all crave it and want it from me, and so I'm gonna, I'm gonna say it how I really see it. The moment you recognize that no human can truly see you the way God and you can see yourself, you're free. [audience applauding] Because that was never their job. It was God's job. Like, when you recognize that you're the only person, you and God are the only people that really know everything you've been through-

Big Sean 46:15 Mm-hmm

Jay Shetty 46:16 ... everything you've lived through, every emotion, every breath, every moment you spoke, every moment in silence, every single moment, the only person who's documented that is you and God.

Big Sean 46:27 Mm.

Jay Shetty 46:27 And so when you

Jay Shetty 46:29 free people of the expectation to understand you, fully see you, fully comprehend you, you free yourself of having to do that for everyone as well because you know you don't have the capacity either. So what it does is it creates greater trust and faith in the divine in yourself, and it creates greater compassion for others, and I think that's what we're all really looking for. We just all want a bit of grace-

Big Sean 46:55 Mm

Jay Shetty 46:56 ... from the people that we love, that we can't understand perfectly. We all want a bit of compassion for not always showing up as our best selves, even when we try-

Big Sean 47:05 Mm-hmm

Jay Shetty 47:06 ... 'cause we know we're all trying, but we don't always meet that mark. And so if we can offer more grace and compassion to others, and we can offer more trust and surrender to ourselves and God-

Big Sean 47:17 Mm-hmm

Jay Shetty 47:18 ... I think that's where real love starts.

Big Sean 47:20 Yeah.

Jay Shetty 47:20 That's where real love comes from.

Big Sean 47:21 And honoring yourself too, right? You gotta really honor yourself and that, like, the strength it takes sometimes to drastically change your life. There's nothing more drastic than when you have to change someone you spend so much time with by choice, not because they passed away, not because of anything else, but because you need to better yourself. And the strength that that takes is nothing to, like, downplay or anything. So I think that comes from... It all comes back from working on yourself, right? And, like, really being confident enough in yourself and all these things we've been talking about to be strong enough to be you because sometimes when you're in a relationship, you lose parts of yourself, and you guys kinda become this one thing together. Um, it's kinda like a factory when all the lights are on, and sometimes you shut off certain parts of yourself and, like, this gets shut down and that gets shut down, and you're kinda just a fraction maybe of, like, the person you were. So the beautiful thing is, is when you recognize that and you split from someone and you turn on all these other parts of yourself and you're, like, the full version of you, I think that is the best version to bring to a relationship, and that is how... You know, it shouldn't be one half make a whole. It should be two wholes make something greater.

Jay Shetty 48:42 [laughing]

Big Sean 48:42 You know what I mean? So-

Jay Shetty 48:43 Yeah. Absolutely.

Big Sean 48:44 Yeah.

Jay Shetty 48:44 Well said.

Big Sean 48:45 Thank you.

Jay Shetty 48:45 Sean, you've done-The final five before on the podcast, I wanna end with one last segment with you.

Big Sean 48:52 Mm-hmm.

Jay Shetty 48:52 We call it past, present, future. And behind you, you're gonna see a picture pop up in a second. Can we get the first, please?

Big Sean 49:01 That's back... Oh, that's, that's young Sean right there. That's little Sean. Yeah, I was, I was a point guard on the, uh, for my school, and we, we actually won a championship in the eighth grade in our league. [audience cheering] And, you know, everyone thought, like, all the parents would be like, "He doesn't look like he's in eighth grade," but I, I look like I'm in eighth grade to me. Um-

Jay Shetty 49:21 [laughs]

Big Sean 49:22 Yeah, that was... Man, that was some good times right there.

Jay Shetty 49:25 What advice would you give to that younger past self of yours in eighth grade?

Big Sean 49:30 Just have fun. Quit-- Get out your head so much. Just have fun and, like, you don't realize how young you are when you that young. You know what I'm saying? Of just being carefree, no bills, no like... I would just say have more fun. Have more fun, man.

Jay Shetty 49:46 I love that.

Big Sean 49:47 Yeah. Quit being so hard on yourself.

Jay Shetty 49:49 All right, let's get the second picture. This is you today.

Big Sean 49:53 Oh, yeah. [laughs]

Jay Shetty 49:54 [laughs] I wanna ask you, what, what do you need to hear right now? What are the words you need to hear right now in your heart and mind?

Big Sean 50:02 The thing that popped in my head, which I like to go with naturally, as simple as it is, is that it's gonna be fine. As a, as a man, we always... I don't wanna characterize all men, and we're not all-- and I don't wanna say this doesn't apply to women as well, it does. Um, I can only speak from a man's perspective, though, that we try and be the head of the household and, like, provide and all these things, and it puts a level of, um, responsibility, which is something that I, um, embrace. It in turn always has to have me do the self-work I know to, like, not let it turn into anxiety and to not let that turn into depression, 'cause I can't afford that, you know? I don't... That's something that I'm keeping far away from my good energy and vibes. But the thing that starts is the worry, and it's kinda what I would tell my younger self is what I would tell myself now as to it's gonna be fine. No matter what happens, it's gonna be fine.

Jay Shetty 51:03 This one I've been doing for all my friends this week. [laughs]

Big Sean 51:06 [laughs] Whoa.

Jay Shetty 51:07 With the help of AI.

Big Sean 51:08 Damn. [laughs]

Jay Shetty 51:09 With the help of AI, I've been, uh, surprising all my, surprising all my friends this week.

Big Sean 51:14 Wow.

Jay Shetty 51:14 Uh, so-

Big Sean 51:16 Jeez

Jay Shetty 51:17 ... how old do you think you are there, Sean?

Big Sean 51:21 Wow. I would say, like, s- my dad's age, like seventy-two, three. My dad looks good for his age.

Jay Shetty 51:29 Yeah, yeah.

Big Sean 51:29 So I would say, like, around there.

Jay Shetty 51:30 He does. Your dad looks great.

Big Sean 51:31 Yeah.

Jay Shetty 51:31 Uh, when you're that age-

Big Sean 51:33 Mm-hmm

Jay Shetty 51:34 ... what do you hope you define success as?

Big Sean 51:38 Fun.

Jay Shetty 51:38 [laughs]

Big Sean 51:39 Fun. Having fun. You gotta have fun with it, and that's one of the biggest of pieces of advice I could give to anyone is whatever you're doing, just, you can make it fun. You got a job you hate, you got things that are the worst part of your day, quote-unquote, "the worst part," you can make it... How you approach something literally changes the whole experience of it. And that is one of the things, like, when you are, like we were talking about going through hard times, like, embrace that. Like, not only embrace it, celebrate it, because that is just proof that you are experiencing parts that are growing pains, that you're growing into something, right? And that you're not in alignment with whatever it is you're going through. So just appreciate that because that, like I said, I said this before, like, that's just an indication that you're meant for something greater. You're something different, something more, and that's exciting. You know? Life isn't all figured out for you. I mean, how boring would that be? You know what I'm saying? If everything was just right in front of you and you knew exactly how to, how it was gonna go. Like, embrace that unknowing. Don't let it tear you down. Don't let it be a fear-based way of thinking. You know, remember, fear is just false evidence appearing real. Don't feed into it. You know what I'm saying? Like, have fun, make it fun, and know that anywhere you are on Earth, that's where you meant to be at, and you can, you can have a good time. With all the money, with no money, with all the... with whatever. With all the friends, no friends. Like, there are, there's always a way to have a good time. So that's what... I feel like that's what older me, that's probably what would be on my heart and, and, you know, if I'm lucky enough to make it to that. Mm.

Jay Shetty 53:24 Give it up for Big Sean, everyone. [audience cheering]

Big Sean 53:28 Yeah. Yeah.

Jay Shetty 53:29 If this is the year that you're trying to get creative, you're trying to build more, I need you to listen to this episode with Rick Rubin on how to break into your most creative self, how to use unconventional methods that lead to success, and the secret to genuinely loving what you do. If you're trying to find your passion and your lane, Rick Rubin's episode is the one for you.

Speaker 53:52 Just because I like it, that doesn't give it any value. Like, as an artist, if you like it, that's all of the value. That's... The success comes when you say, "I like this enough for other people to see it."