Jay Shetty PodcastThe Real Reason Your Habits Keep Failing and the 7 TINY Fixes That Actually Work!
EVERY SPOKEN WORD
20 min read · 3,601 words- 0:00 – 1:02
Introduction
- JSJay Shetty
If you're watching right now, it means to me that you're ready for a reset. You're ready for a clean out, you're ready for a refocus. Maybe you're like, "Jay, I just need to press that reset button so that I can restart and focus in the direction I wanna go." I have used each of these habits to reset when I've been tired, low on energy, feeling no momentum, and feeling no motivation, and I have no idea how anyone functions without them. In seven days, you'll notice that these habits don't fight your life, they fit inside it. Each one meets you in the exact moment your mind starts to spiral. They don't demand more time, they reclaim the time your stress is already stealing. Small habits don't just change your days, they change the way your days feel. The number one health and wellness podcast. Jay Shetty. Jay Shetty. The one, the only Jay Shetty.
- 1:02 – 7:05
The 3-Breath Reset
- JSJay Shetty
I have no idea how people get through their day without these habits. We all experience so much stress every day, whether you're running late for work, or a family member is creating drama, or you just had a falling out with a friend. These habits help you emotionally regulate no matter where you are. You can do these in bed, at home, in the car, on a bus or train, even in the bathroom. Number one, breathwork, specifically the 3-Breath Reset. We've all heard about breathing. We've all talked about breathing. But we don't realize the value it actually offers. I remember my first day at monk school when I saw a young monk teaching younger monks, and I was observing from afar. I then spoke to him afterwards, and I asked him what he was teaching. He said it was their first day of school. And I said, "Well, what did you teach them on your first day of school?" He said, "Well, what did you learn on your first day of school?" I said, "I think we learned like one, two, three or ABC. I can't even remember." He said, "Well, I was teaching them how to breathe." And I said, "Wow, that, that's incredible." And he said to me, this 10-year-old, 11-year-old monk, he said to me, "When you're happy, what changes? Your breath. When you're sad, what changes? Your breath. When you're stressed, what changes? Your breath." He said, "Your breath is connected to every emotion you experience in life. Your breath is the only thing that stays with you from the moment you're born to the moment you die. Your country you live in change, your family changes, your friend will change, but your breath is always there with you." He said to me, "If you learn to master your breath, you'll master your life." We undervalue how useful our breath is in managing emotion, in regulating stress. Here's when to use this trick. When your phone buzzes with a message that makes your stomach drop, when you're stuck in traffic and you're already late, when you're about to say something you will regret. Here's what I want you to do. Take three deliberate breaths, in for four seconds and out for six. The long exhales stimulate the vagus nerve, lowering heart rate and cortisol. It's the biological equivalent of hitting save before your emotions crash the file. And I know what you're thinking. "Jay, I've heard it before. Three deep breaths, it didn't solve the problem. I still had an argument with my partner." Here's the reality. It doesn't fix the problem. It fixes the state you're in while facing the problem. Running late for work? Take a deep breath. Stuck in traffic? Take a deep breath. Disagreement with your partner? Take a deep breath. An email you can't stop rereading? Take a deep breath. When you're blamed for something small or ignored for something big, take a deep breath. When the phone doesn't buzz, when the message doesn't come, when the plans fall apart, take a deep breath. When you're halfway through explaining yourself and realize you don't need to, take a deep breath. When you feel like you're falling behind, falling short, or just falling apart, take a deep breath. Because that breath is a border between reaction and response, between who you were a second ago and who you still have time to be. You don't need to fix the moment. You just need to pause inside it. Think about all the times you've said something you didn't mean. Think about all the times you've looked back on a moment and thought to yourself, "I could have done that better." That breath allows you the ability to make something out of a bad situation. It is bad. The breath doesn't make it better. You are late. The breath doesn't make it better. It just allows you to not make more mistakes. It stops you from taking things down the wrong angle. Breathwork to me has been my companion, whether I'm about to go on stage and I'm nervous, or when I'm running late, I'm in the back of an Uber, and I know I'm gonna be late for this meeting that's really important, all the way through to when I feel like I'm having an argument with someone I care about or even someone that's new to my life. It's really powerful. Even if you think about working out, what allows you to lift more? Your breath, right? What allows you to function when you're running? Your breath. If you think about athletes, they can run for the amount of time they can and exert the energy they can because they monitor their breath.If you think about singers who hit incredible notes, musicians who play wind instruments, they can hit those because of the control of their breath. So much beauty in life exists because of the control of our breath. Even if you look at boxers, they can hit with more energy, more precision when they master their breath. Breath is the single most underestimated tool and asset that each and every one was gifted with since the moment we were born. It can manage stress, give you energy, refocus you, make you present. If you invest in one habit this month, this year, focus on breathing. It'll change the way you sleep, change the way you work out, change the way you eat. It's such an undervalued part of human life, and you don't have to pay for it, and it's easy to learn. Breathe in for four and out for six to start.
- 7:05 – 9:53
Start Your Morning With Natural Light, Not Screens!
- JSJay Shetty
Number two, morning light, no scroll. When you're already scrolling before you've even left bed. Here's how it works. Go outside, outside of your doorway, outside onto the lawn, outside onto your back, tiny balcony, whatever it is, even just a window. For two to five minutes, expose yourself to natural light. Morning sunlight aligns your circadian rhythm. This is chronobiology in practice. Your body clock resets through your eyes. Why does this matter? You stop starting the day in comparison and chaos. Light before screens tells your brain it's morning, not a crisis. Think about this. Most of us don't wake up to light, we wake up to sound, and that sound is usually an alert or an alarm. Now, let's talk about those two words. You need an alert when you need to be jolted. You need an alarm when there's an emergency. Every day, we wake up in a state of emergency because we wake up to an alarm. The alarm triggers you to wake up with stress, with pressure, maybe even feeling tight-chested. And all of a sudden, you grab your phone in that moment, and now you have everyone telling you what you didn't do yesterday, what you've got to do today, and what you forgot to do last week. We start our days at zero if you slept well, and now when you pick up your phone, you've added news, negativity, and notifications. You're at a minus three, and then you add noise to it, minus four. For the rest of your day, you're simply trying to climb up back to zero. And you may be saying, "Jay, I don't live in a sunny climate." Outdoors, being in the light, right? Just being exposed to it. Remember the sun and the moon and the darkness and the light were the way we knew whether it was night and day, and that's how we functioned. Today, we work in the night and sleep in the day. But before, we followed that natural rhythm. The alignment you create when you don't look at your phone first thing in the morning just for five minutes, just for five minutes, your brain actually has the time to warm up. What's incredible is the ancient traditions of India talk about the practice of Surya Namaskar, which translates to sun salutations, to salute the sun. This is how people started their day. It was a ritual, a practice. Today, science has proved that starting your day off with sunlight is great for your circadian rhythm. Don't underestimate this free opportunity to start your day better than stress. We all want to feel better, to have more energy and more focus throughout
- 9:53 – 13:09
The 2-Minute Tidy
- JSJay Shetty
the day. That's why I co-founded Juni, a sparkling adaptogenic drink made with powerful ingredients like ashwagandha and lion's mane. It's designed to boost your mood, support your focus, and give you natural energy, all without the crash. A new classic reimagined. We're so excited to officially launch our new lemonade iced tea flavor. When we created Juni, my goal was simple. I wanted to make drinks that help you feel balanced and energized without compromise. Our upgraded take on the classic Arnold Palmer is crisp, refreshing, and crafted with adaptogens to support energy, focus, and mood, all with zero sugar. Be among the first to try it. Available exclusively at drinkjuni.com, where you can use the code ONPURPOSE20 for twenty percent off your first order. Cheers to your daily mood boost. Number three, I call this the two-minute tidy. Maybe after a long Zoom call when your desk looks like a crime scene. Maybe when you feel emotionally cluttered but don't know why. Here's how it works. Pick one small zone, your counter, your bag, your inbox, and give it two clean minutes. Visible order creates internal order. Small actions restore a sense of control and dopamine flow. And here's why it matters. When life feels messy, your environment becomes your mirror. Straighten the mirror, the reflection follows. Right, if you looked into a mirror and it was slightly tilted, or you have one of those ones that kind of move back and forth, you're not getting an accurate reflection. That's what your space can feel like. Have you ever noticed how clearing your space empties your mind? How when you can't focus on your work, if you clear your space, your thoughts kind of get clearer in order. If you can't focus on your work, clear your space. If you can't hear your own thoughts, clear your space. When everything feels heavy for no clear reason, clear your space. When your mood dips but nothing's wrong-Clear your space. When the day feels stale, when your mind feels stuck, when your energy won't move, clear your space. When you don't know what you need, start by creating room to find out. Wipe the counter, fold the blanket, open the window, let light in. Let air in. Let you back in. Because your space is an echo of your mind. Cluttered rooms equal cluttered thoughts. You can't always control what's happening inside you, but you can shape what's around you. Every time you clear your space, you tell your brain, "We're safe now." Every surface you clear gives your mind permission to breathe. When I was in the monastery, I learned this statement that I wanna share with you that changed my life. Location has energy. Time has memory. When you do something in the space every day, it carries the energy, and when you do something at the same time every day, it carries
- 13:09 – 16:16
The Gratitude Text
- JSJay Shetty
the memory. But sometimes our spaces where we spend a lot of time get cluttered. We eat where we're meant to sleep, we sleep where we're meant to work, and we work where we're meant to eat. The energy is disorganized, and so is the space. No wonder you can't focus on that table. No wonder you can't sleep in bed, because the things that are around it, the space that's created, the energy that it holds, doesn't allow for that rest or that focus. 2-Minute Tidy. We always say to ourself, "Oh, I'll do it on the weekend. Oh, I need to find that one day to fix that space. Oh, I'll clean the whole house on the weekend." 2-Minute Tidy. Just sort your desk out. You'll feel focused. You'll be ready. 2-Minute Tidy. Just put the duvet right. You'll be ready. 2-Minute Tidy will solve so many challenges in your life. Give it a go. Number four, the Gratitude Text. Here's when to use it. When you're lonely scrolling on social media, send a text instead. When you feel unseen, undervalued, or quietly angry at everyone, send a gratitude text instead. Here's how it works. Send one genuine message. No long essay, just a few honest words. "Hey, I just wanted to say I appreciate you." Studies show that gratitude boosts serotonin and strengthens emotional bonds. Here's how gratitude works. It shifts attention from what's missing to what's present. In a world of constant comparison, gratitude is rebellion. Did someone hold the door open for you? Say thank you. Did your coffee taste exactly right this morning? Say thank you. Did a friend text you just to check in? Say thank you. Did you wake up next to someone you love or simply wake up at all? Say thank you. When the sky looks ordinary, but the air feels kind, say thank you. When plans fall through, but peace shows up instead, say thank you. When the lesson hurt, but it taught you something true, say thank you. When nothing special happened, but nothing terrible did either, say thank you. Say thank you when it's easy. Say thank you when it's hard. Say thank you when you have enough and especially when you think you don't, because gratitude doesn't change what you have. It changes how you see what you have. Every time you say thank you, you remind your mind that not everything is missing. And every time you forget, life waits patiently to show you something else to be grateful for. I know gratitude sounds soft. I know it sounds weak, but studies show that when you're present in gratitude, you can't be anywhere else. If you're having an anxious thought, replace it with a grateful one. If you're having a worry-filled thought, have it replaced with a thankful one. You can't live in both places at once. It's an incredible, incredible trick of the mind. Write
- 16:16 – 17:48
The 20-Second Cold Rinse
- JSJay Shetty
a two-minute message to one person personally, one person professionally, and if you can, be expressive, be specific, and be personal. If you get a message that just says thank you, that's nice. But if you get a message that says, "Thank you so much for taking care of my friend when they were visiting, and I just want you to know that they felt really loved and cared for," you're allowing that opportunity for that person to repeat that behavior. When you reward something, that person will repeat it. We reward drama by paying it too much attention. We reward stress by paying it too much attention. Let's reward good behavior, even if it's small. When you notice it, you'll notice it more. Number five, the 20-Second Cold Rinse. I know what you're thinking. "Jay, I don't wanna get in the cold. It's gonna hurt. It's terrible." Here's when to try it. When you finish your shower, just right at the end of your shower, the r- last 30 seconds is a great place to do it, whatever time you shower. When you're hitting an energy slump, it's a great time to give it a go. When you're anxious before a big meeting or a call. And by the way, it can't just be cold water on your face. You don't need to get in the shower if you're at work. When you need a reset, but you can't take a break, it's a great reset. Here's how it works. In the morning or the evening, end your shower with 20 seconds of cold water. That shock floods the body
- 17:48 – 20:02
The 1-Sentence Journal to End the Day with Peace
- JSJay Shetty
with norepinephrine, sharpening focus and mood for hours. Cold exposure activates resilience circuits, a microdose of discomfort that trains your brain for bigger stress. Here's why it matters. You start teaching yourself discomfort isn't dangerI can do uncomfortable things. This one belief, this affirmation, I can do uncomfortable things. When you prove that to yourself in the morning with 20 seconds of cold, you come out of there with so much confidence, so much clarity, ready to hit the day. It doesn't make the day better. It gives you the inner confidence of dealing with the stresses that your day will throw at you better, and it's just 20 seconds. Number six, the one-sentence journal. You might have heard about journaling before, but I feel a lot of us struggle with it. You struggle with, "Well, what do I write about every day?" You struggle with like, "How much do I write? Oh my God, there's three pages here. I've only got three paragraphs," maybe even less, three lines. I want you to try the one-sentence journal. Here's when to use it. When you're lying in bed, replaying conversations, or worrying about tomorrow, when your thoughts feel heavier than your day really was. Here's how it works. Write one line, "Today I noticed..." That's it. This simple cognitive reappraisal helps your brain file away experience instead of looping it. Here's why it matters. Your brain doesn't need a perfect ending to rest. It just needs closure. Today, I noticed that gratitude isn't a grand gesture. It's a glance you decide to linger on. Tomorrow, I'll notice something else, the way someone laughs, the shape of the moon, the way life keeps offering tiny miracles disguised as ordinary moments. Today, I noticed how quiet the morning is before I look at my phone. Today, I noticed how good the first sip of tea was when I'm not multitasking through it. Today, I noticed the barista knew my name, and that it made me smile more than I expected. Today, I noticed my friend's laugh on a
- 20:02 – 23:03
The “Future You” Check-In
- JSJay Shetty
voice note they sent to me. Today, I noticed a song I've played 100 times and still makes me feel something. Today, I noticed I complain about the weather no matter what it's doing. Today, I noticed how nice it felt when someone asked how I was and really waited for the answer. Today, I noticed how much of life happens while I'm staring at a screen. It's not profound, just practice, the practice of looking up instead of scrolling down, of paying attention before life becomes background noise, of realizing that small moments don't stay small unless you ignore them. The truth is noticing won't fix your life, but it will remind you that it's already happening right now in the middle of your ordinary day. Number seven, the 30-second Future You Check-In. Here's when to use it. When you're about to say yes to something you don't wanna do, when you're debating one more drink, one more scroll, or one more online order. Here's how it works. Pause and ask, "Will future me thank me for this?" That question activates the prefrontal cortex, the rational part of the brain interrupting impulse circuits. Here's why it matters. It reminds you that discipline isn't self-denial. It's self-respect delayed by 24 hours. Will future me thank me for hitting snooze again or getting up and taking care of the day before I get behind? Will future me thank me for saying yes to everything or for finally saying no and sticking to it? Will future me thank me for spending money to feel better or for saving it so I can actually be better later? Will future me thank me for sending that message in anger or for breathing before replying? Will future me thank me for scrolling through other people's lives or for living my own for a few quiet minutes? So before you decide, before you speak, before you spend, before you scroll, ask once softly, "Will future me thank me for this?" In seven days, you'll notice these habits don't fight your life. They fit inside it. Each one meets you in the exact moment your mind starts to spiral. They don't demand more time. They reclaim the time your stress is already stealing. Small habits don't just change your days. They change the way your days feel. If you loved this episode, you will also love my interview with Charles Duhigg on how to hack your brain, change any habit effortlessly, and the secret to making better decisions.
- SPSpeaker
Look, am I hesitating on this because I'm scared of making the choice, 'cause I'm scared of doing the work, or am I sitting with this because it just doesn't feel right yet
Episode duration: 23:03
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