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Joe Rogan Experience #1090 - Andrew Santino

Andrew Santino is a stand up comedian and actor. You can also see him the show "I'm Dying Up Here" on SHOWTIME.

Joe RoganhostAndrew SantinoguestGuestguest
Mar 14, 20183h 8mWatch on YouTube ↗

EVERY SPOKEN WORD

  1. 0:0015:00

    That was ... You…

    1. JR

      That was ... You looked at that and went, "This is the move."

    2. AS

      Point break.

    3. (laughs)

    4. JR

      Cupcake shirt.

    5. AS

      Point bake.

    6. Point break.

    7. JR

      Are we working?

    8. AS

      Yeah.

    9. JR

      Is it working?

    10. AS

      Yeah. What's up? Sorry.

    11. JR

      Are we live?

    12. AS

      Yeah, yeah.

    13. (laughs)

    14. JR

      Okay. (laughs)

    15. AS

      I was like ... We were talking here because I go ... Yeah.

    16. (laughs)

    17. JR

      I was like, "What's he doing?" You're like, "Yep, yeah, yeah."

    18. AS

      So, we're there. We're there, we're there, we're there.

    19. JR

      We, I wish we could start this show off with Flavor In Your Ear. Would we get kicked off of YouTube? Craig Mack died.

    20. AS

      Oh, man.

    21. Yeah, that's a, that's just a shout-out.

    22. JR

      I know. I, I feel like we should be able to just as a-

    23. AS

      << I'm kicking new <<Shout-out>> Flavor In Your Ear >>...

    24. JR

      ... as a shout-out. That was a great fucking song, man.

    25. AS

      Man, it was such a good song.

    26. JR

      Dude was only 46.

    27. AS

      What was that? I didn't even see what he died of.

    28. JR

      Heart attack.

    29. AS

      Was it?

    30. JR

      Yeah, heart failure, 46. Fuck, man.

  2. 15:0030:00

    (laughs) …

    1. AS

      square foot, two bed, two bath-

    2. JR

      (laughs)

    3. AS

      (laughs)

    4. JR

      My friend's daughter just moved to, uh, New York City. She got a job in New York City and she moved to this place where she pays $1200 for a room that doesn't even have a sink.

    5. AS

      In Manhattan?

    6. JR

      In Manhattan.

    7. AS

      Yeah.

    8. JR

      They have a community bathroom down the hall. She has a-

    9. AS

      Dude, that is so gross.

    10. JR

      ... she has a hot plate. She has a hot plate in her room, and there's no room for anything.

    11. AS

      No refrigerator, no none of that shit?

    12. JR

      No.

    13. AS

      It's a room.

    14. JR

      No.

    15. AS

      You bought a room.

    16. JR

      It's so little.

    17. AS

      1200.

    18. JR

      She has a, a bed, there's a bed that sits there, and then there's like, she has this little tiny area where has a shelf, and then she has a hot plate that sits on the shelf.

    19. GU

      Mm.

    20. JR

      That's it. That's it. If you have clothes, you gotta stack 'em up in boxes on the ground.

    21. AS

      The best city in the world, baby!

    22. JR

      $1200.

    23. AS

      For a room.

    24. JR

      Now think, if you're a kid, like 'cause she's only 21, um, think if you're a kid and you move to, uh, New York. How much are you making? What are you ma- Are you even making $1200 a month? (laughs)

    25. GU

      Maybe.

    26. JR

      I mean, you might make-

    27. AS

      You're probably clearing-

    28. JR

      ... $400, $500 a week-

    29. AS

      Right.

    30. JR

      ... before taxes, right? And then the taxes come, you might be down to four, right? So you, you, what are you doing? You're paying $1200 and you're making 16?

  3. 30:0045:00

    Well, you should say…

    1. AS

      me it's this. If you said, if a guy said, "Fuck the Jews," I disagree with what he says.

    2. JR

      Well, you should say how do you fuck them? Do you fuck them generally?

    3. AS

      In the ass? Do you fuck them in front, in the back?

    4. JR

      You know, mouth fuck them?

    5. AS

      (laughs)

    6. JR

      Do you go, go around the world? What are you doing?

    7. AS

      Do you Kvetch after?

    8. JR

      (laughs)

    9. AS

      No, but I think it's like, what, what, what-

    10. JR

      (laughs)

    11. AS

      Listen, that person, that person, what, what ... But hate speech to me is like a, it's just a big, huge term that can encompass so many things. I don't really know what it is.

    12. JR

      Right.

    13. AS

      Does it incite violence?

    14. JR

      That's a good question.

    15. AS

      If I said, "Fuck the Jews," does that incite violence?

    16. JR

      It shouldn't.

    17. AS

      No, that's just that, if I said, "Fuck your shirt."

    18. JR

      It, it only incites violence-

    19. AS

      That didn't incite you to tear his shirt off.

    20. JR

      That was pretty close. As soon as you, you, the way you said shirt, I was like, "Yeah."

    21. AS

      (laughs)

    22. JR

      (laughs)

    23. AS

      Leading a shirt revolution?

    24. JR

      Yeah, fuck shirts.

    25. AS

      Take your fucking shirt off, Jimmy.

    26. JR

      Shirt, you wearing a fucking shirt, bro?Seriously, bro? The only way "fuck the Jews" works is if someone also thinks "fuck the Jews," and then you, like, find like-minded shitheads.

    27. AS

      But that's gonna happen no matter what.

    28. JR

      But it's, uh, not gonna happen if you don't say it. Then you... So, the idea is like, can you suppress it? Here's the problem with stopping hate speech, is like, who's to decide? Because they're pushing the boundary with hate speech so far now.

    29. AS

      Right.

    30. JR

      Like, if you call a trans woman a man, that's hate speech. Like that, there, there's, it's getting-

  4. 45:0058:02

    The trial was in…

    1. JR

      with a, like, a destroyed hard drive and, uh, I think they never found his body. I think he, I think he fucking vanished.

    2. AS

      The trial was in 2012.

    3. '12.

    4. JR

      2012, okay.

    5. AS

      Right.

    6. JR

      So that was the trial. So he's ar- ar- arrested in 2011.

    7. AS

      Yeah.

    8. Right.

    9. JR

      Find the guy who was the original investigator who, uh, turned up missing. Either turned up missing or murdered and his laptop, uh, was found with a destroyed hard drive. Like, someone clearly got ahold of this guy and, and-

    10. AS

      That im-

    11. JR

      ... fucking iced him because he was gonna destroy Penn State. I mean, he was gonna take down this-

    12. AS

      And he disappeared.

    13. JR

      ... multi-billion dollar industry. What happened to Ray Gricar?

    14. AS

      To, to Ray. Wow.

    15. JR

      Um, see if you can get this story. Sc- scroll, make it larger there so I could read it with my old eyes. "10 years ago, a prosecutor in Centre County, Pennsylvania took the day off work and vanished. Since then, the case of Ray Gricar has been one of the most intriguing and..." I don't know if I'm saying his name right, G-R-I-C-A-R.

    16. AS

      Gricar sounds like-

    17. JR

      Gricar, Gricar.

    18. AS

      Gricar Noir.

    19. JR

      Yeah. "Is one of the most intriguing and talked about missing persons stories in the country. Investigators have taken dives at the bottom of lakes, dug up a grave, chased more than 300 reported sightings from Arizona to North Carolina."

    20. AS

      Shit.

    21. JR

      "Dropped flyers all over Slovenia, consulted a psychic, interviewed a member of Hells Angels, and enlisted NASA technology, but no one's been able to find the veteran distri- dit- district attorney who was 59 when he disappeared. He went missing that Friday morning, April 15th, 2005, left behind a live-in girlfriend, beautiful and successful daughter, and a bank account that was supposed to fund a fast-approaching retirement."

    22. AS

      Oh, here's where the problem was.

    23. JR

      Yeah.

    24. AS

      He drove a red Mini Cooper.

    25. JR

      Oh, well-

    26. AS

      That was one... Yeah.

    27. JR

      A lot of those things just make people kill themselves.

    28. AS

      (laughs)

    29. (laughs)

    30. JR

      As, as far hard evidence goes, that's about all the police have. The best lead they got was a sighting of a woman who has not been identified, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But let's listen, find out the, the, the conspiracy, 'cause the conspiracy was that he was a part of the Sandusky investigation.

Episode duration: 3:08:08

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