Joe Rogan Experience #1271 - Billy Corben

Joe Rogan 0:01 5, 4, 3, 2... Hello, Billy. We're live.

Billy Corben 0:11 Yo, Joe.

Joe Rogan 0:12 What's going on buddy?

Billy Corben 0:12 How you doing?

Joe Rogan 0:13 I watched your new documentary this morning in the gym. Loved it. It was fucking great.

Billy Corben 0:18 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 0:18 It's crazy. I love your use of little kids. I, I don't wanna give away too much of it, uh, but it's about the steroid scandal involving baseball and Alex Rodriguez, but what, what was the choice to use little kids to play Arod and all the other key principles involved in the scandal, like to, to play, use little actors?

Billy Corben 0:39 What kids?

Joe Rogan 0:40 Oh, come on, fella.

Billy Corben 0:41 You're just, (laughs) you're just high, dude.

Joe Rogan 0:42 Oh.

Billy Corben 0:43 No. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 0:43 I was pretty sober.

Billy Corben 0:44 (laughs) It's the gym, yeah. Um, so you, you now know the story because you've seen the doc, and if people remember the Biogenesis steroid scandal. If not, the movie, I think, recaps it pretty, pretty well. But the thing that struck me is that, like, all these guys acted like children.

Joe Rogan 1:00 (laughs)

Billy Corben 1:00 They really did.

Joe Rogan 1:01 Yeah.

Billy Corben 1:02 And, and to boot, so, you know, we've done some, some sports docs in the past. We did, you know, some of the ESPN 30 for 30s, like the U, and, um, when you do a sports doc, I mean, uh, I don't wanna say it's, it's easy 'cause it's, you know, making documentaries i- is a challenge, but sports docs are pretty, like, paint by numbers. It's like you interview some players, you interview some coaches, some journalists. They mention a bunch of games, and you show a bunch of game footage. You know? Like, it's a pretty straightforward process. Uh-

Joe Rogan 1:31 Yeah.

Billy Corben 1:32 ... with this one, it's not about baseball. It's, it's baseball adjacent, I guess-

Joe Rogan 1:36 Right.

Billy Corben 1:36 ... but, like, it's about shit that went down in nightclubs, in shady clinics with fake doctors, hotel rooms, bars, locker rooms. So you got a bunch of guy- talking heads in your documentary, but then you got, you got nothing to cut to. You got no B-roll. So I'm like, "We're gonna need to shoot recrees, you know, recreations here."

Joe Rogan 1:55 Right.

Billy Corben 1:55 Which is, which is, to me, I, (sighs) I don't know. It's like when you're doing nonfiction filmmaking, it's fake shit when y- when you film recreations. So it's like, I'm like, "How do we do this in a creative way that, that's consistent with the tone of the movie?" Which was always called Screwball, meaning it was always like a farce, you know, like a Carl Hiaasen or Elmore Leonard, Cohen brothers-esque-

Joe Rogan 2:17 Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Billy Corben 2:17 ... sort of Florida fuckery farce.

Joe Rogan 2:19 Yeah.

Billy Corben 2:19 And so we just wanted to keep in that, in that mode, so I'm watching the characters. So we got Tony Bosch, uh, who was the fake doctor, and Porter Fisher, who was the whistleblower who stole the medical records and, and started this whole thing. They were then stolen from him and then sold to, not the highest bidder, but any bidder and every bidder, they were sold to. And they're talking, and I'm noticing that they had, like, a very similar storytelling style. Like, for example, guy will be like, "So I walk into his office, and I say, 'I want my money.'" And he says, "I don't have your money." And I said, "Well, you better get my money." And he said, "What are you gonna do about it?" And I said, "I'm gonna break your neck." And I'm like, "Oh, shit." They, they're so vivid and in the moment and, and, and talking dialogue, so we could Drunk History this, right? We could-

Joe Rogan 3:09 (laughs)

Billy Corben 3:09 ... we could edit together the doc and then have the actors lip syncing the actual interview dialogue, and all the actors will be eight years old.

Joe Rogan 3:17 (laughs)

Billy Corben 3:17 And, and I, I don't know. Like I- I've always wanted to do it. Like, way back, uh, Spike Jonze, 1997, Biggie video, Sky's the Limit. Biggie had just been murdered. He was faced with this challenge of producing a posthumous video, and so Spike Jonze was like, "Okay, we'll just do a straight up classic Bad Boy Records circa '97 music video, cars, Versace wardrobe, girls, mansion, hot tub, but they'll all be eight years old." You got baby Biggie-

Joe Rogan 3:53 Right.

Billy Corben 3:53 ... Baby Puffy, baby Bus-

Joe Rogan 3:53 Yeah.

Billy Corben 3:54 ... Baby Busta Rhymes, baby Lil' Kim.

Joe Rogan 3:56 I've seen it, yeah.

Billy Corben 3:56 Yeah, it's brilliant.

Joe Rogan 3:57 Yeah.

Billy Corben 3:57 And so I was like, "What a great div-..." That was always kicking around since, since '97, and then I saw this off-Broadway musical about 10, 10-ish years ago called A Very Merry Unarau- (laughs) Let me try that one more time. A Very Merry Unauthorized Children's Scientology Pageant.

Joe Rogan 4:14 (laughs)

Billy Corben 4:15 (laughs) I- don't ask me to say it again. I can't say it again.

Joe Rogan 4:17 Jesus.

Billy Corben 4:17 Um, so it's this, it's this wild musical, like, very Bowie-esque score written by a couple of Yalees. Li- it's like, it's a, it's a Christmas pageant performed by elementary school kids, but instead of the story of Jesus, it's the story of L. Ron Hubbard.

Joe Rogan 4:33 (laughs)

Billy Corben 4:34 All with like, in like, a school play with like, you know, papier-mache, like, sets and, and, and construction paper costumes and props. And I wanted to... I got together with one of the composers. I said, "Listen, I'd like to get the rights to your musical and make a Scientology documentary using the kids in the musical as a framing device." 'Cause in those days, no one was making... Now everybody makes Scientology documentaries. In those days, nobody was doing it, particularly because, like, the church is so litigious. And so they had kinda left this musical alone, so I thought, like, "That might be a cool buffer." Like, "Maybe if I make a documentary that's a little light, you know, and it's, like, this children's musical, but we intercut it with real, uh, real documentary investigation, interviews, and, um, that maybe we'll kinda get away with it." Nobody (laughs) wanted to make that movie, dude.

Joe Rogan 5:22 (laughs)

Billy Corben 5:22 I mean, nobody. I mean, doors were closing before I even knocked out, like, got to them, um, and I kind of filed, again, filed that idea away in the back of my head. And then, um, a couple years ago, there was that funny viral video of like, it was like a Scarface school play. I don't know if it was, like, a bunch of little kids doing Scarface as, like, an elementary school play.

Joe Rogan 5:43 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 5:43 And I was like...This is such a, it's such a great device and, and the problem is you need to find something that it works for. Like, like Cocaine Cowbabies would not have been appropriate.

Joe Rogan 5:52 Right. (laughs)

Billy Corben 5:52 For example, a bunch of eight-year-old kids running around. Um, it's not Bugsy Malone, you know. So, um, it just, like, it just, like, kinda the stars aligned. We just, like, I was, like, "This is, this is gonna work here, I think, with this."

Joe Rogan 6:03 It works.

Billy Corben 6:03 "Thank you."

Joe Rogan 6:03 It works great, and it's such a crazy story. And the fact ... Well, I don't wanna give too much of it away because I really want people to watch it because, I mean, I've, I've talked about Cocaine Cowboys probably 100 times on this podcast. It's one of my all-time favorite podcasts.

Billy Corben 6:15 Thank you.

Joe Rogan 6:15 Oh, excuse me, all-time favorite documentaries. But this is, this is a story that almost writes itself. It's so bonkers.

Billy Corben 6:22 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 6:23 The, and the fact that it all could've been avoided if one guy just paid another guy, or just didn't try to rip him off. Like-

Billy Corben 6:31 For, like, four grand.

Joe Rogan 6:32 Yeah. Like, nothing.

Billy Corben 6:33 Doesn't make any sense.

Joe Rogan 6:34 It's fucking crazy.

Billy Corben 6:35 Yeah. I-

Joe Rogan 6:36 And the guy, what a bizarro personality-

Billy Corben 6:39 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 6:40 ... he was, who would just tan every day and hang out at this doctor's office-

Billy Corben 6:46 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 6:46 ... in the waiting room, telling everybody how great it was. Like, the whole thing is so strange.

Billy Corben 6:51 Well, like, that's, everybody remembers it as, like, the A-Rod or A-Roid scandal, you know.

Joe Rogan 6:54 Yes.

Billy Corben 6:54 And, and the truth of the matter is that Alex Rodriguez was collateral damage-

Joe Rogan 6:59 Yes.

Billy Corben 6:59 ... in this whole thing.

Joe Rogan 7:00 Yeah.

Billy Corben 7:00 It was not about him. Don't tell Alex that, but it's not about him, you know. It's, it, it was really the highest, the career of the highest-paid baseball player of all time effectively ended over a $4,000 debt-

Joe Rogan 7:15 (laughs)

Billy Corben 7:15 ... between this cocaine-addicted fake doctor and his fake-tan-addicted steroid patient.

Joe Rogan 7:22 Yeah.

Billy Corben 7:22 And it's like, that's why I said, it's like a Florida Fuckery story, straight up. It's just like this-

Joe Rogan 7:25 Yeah.

Billy Corben 7:26 ... classic, only-in-Miami absurd farce. And if that's-

Joe Rogan 7:30 Well, that's what you specialize in.

Billy Corben 7:31 (laughs) That's sort of our style.

Joe Rogan 7:31 You really do specialize-

Billy Corben 7:32 (laughs) Yeah.

Joe Rogan 7:33 You specialize in Florida fuckery. I go to your Twitter feed all the time-

Billy Corben 7:36 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 7:36 ... for current Florida fuckery.

Billy Corben 7:38 It's just, it's, yeah, it's distilled. It's just, like, it's pure. It's 100% pure.

Joe Rogan 7:41 There's so much good stuff.

Billy Corben 7:42 Uncut Florida fuckery.

Joe Rogan 7:43 Yeah.

Billy Corben 7:44 It's just, it's ... And that's what this story is to me 'cause, like, Miami is just ... Well, they say the great thing about Miami is it's so close to the United States, but, like-

Joe Rogan 7:52 (laughs)

Billy Corben 7:53 It's, it's also, like, it's America's Casablanca.

Joe Rogan 7:56 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 7:57 Like, just people kinda flee to Miami from, like, all over the country and all over the world, usually leaving some kind of criminality in their wake.

Joe Rogan 8:06 Yeah.

Billy Corben 8:07 And, you know, come here and kind of there and reinvent themselves, you know. Like, it's just, and then you have all of these criminals there who are then kind of baking in the sun, you know, in this kind of multicultural fucking paella, you know, that we have.

Joe Rogan 8:20 (laughs)

Billy Corben 8:20 And then they just, like, and then they start putting their, their minds together and brainstorming, and they hatch just the most inane schemes and scams. Like, that's our primary export from Miami, is just schemes and scams.

Joe Rogan 8:33 Well, it's just so amazing that it's still a cocaine culture too. After all these years, it still has a giant cocaine engine pumping out all this chaos.

Billy Corben 8:42 W- we don't have any indigenous industry.

Joe Rogan 8:46 (laughs)

Billy Corben 8:46 I mean, there's no factory where everybody goes to work and then, 30 years later, gets a watch.

Joe Rogan 8:50 Right.

Billy Corben 8:50 There's no, there's no business there. It's ... Carl Hiaasen says, "All we produce in Florida is oranges and machine guns."

Joe Rogan 8:56 (laughs)

Billy Corben 8:56 We don't, we don't make anything there. We sell the dream. We sell the sunshine, you know.

Joe Rogan 9:00 Right.

Billy Corben 9:00 It's lies that came true.

Joe Rogan 9:02 Yeah.

Billy Corben 9:02 You know, and so, and even more frightening is the Miami of today is the America of tomorrow. So, it's like there's a lot of lessons to be gleaned from down there. But it's basically, at this point, a money, a real estate hustle and a money-laundering capital. So, it's really no different than it ever was. Everybody likes to tell me, "Oh, it's changed. It's grown." I'm like, "Just 'cause you've built a bunch of shit doesn't mean we've grown."

Joe Rogan 9:22 Right.

Billy Corben 9:22 And Miami is just, like, Miami is one of the youngest cities in the country. In, in your parlance, it would about one person old, or one and a half people ago.

Joe Rogan 9:31 Wow.

Billy Corben 9:31 Like, one and a half people ago, you know. Like (laughs) -

Joe Rogan 9:34 (laughs)

Billy Corben 9:34 It's just, it, we're the y- we're one of the youngest cities.

Joe Rogan 9:37 Right.

Billy Corben 9:37 Um, barely 100, just over 100, you know.

Joe Rogan 9:40 And correct me if I'm wrong 'cause I've said this before, but isn't there more banks per capita in Miami than anywhere else?

Billy Corben 9:46 Well, there certainly, there certainly was, um, before the, you know, the, the, uh, the Great Recession when a lot of them started shutting down, but most of them have rebounded. Uh, one of the clever things some of the real estate developers did was they opened their own bank, literally their own bank. They had a bank where the entire board of the bank were all real estate developers, and over 90% of the loans the bank made was insider loans-

Joe Rogan 10:10 Oh, God.

Billy Corben 10:11 ... just to the board. And then, of course, they went belly up in the Great Recession, and what happened? We bailed them out.

Joe Rogan 10:16 Oh, Jesus.

Billy Corben 10:16 So, it was all their own shit. It's crazy.

Joe Rogan 10:19 So, we bailed out real estate salesmen.

Billy Corben 10:20 Real estate sale- ... who loaned themselves money that is, wound up being backed ultimately by us, by the taxpayers.

Joe Rogan 10:29 Fuck.

Billy Corben 10:29 Yeah, I mean, that's the old ... Remember the, uh, I mean, you hear that line all the time now that, like, you know, um, the, we, people used to rob the bank from the outside in. Now it's-

Joe Rogan 10:37 Yeah.

Billy Corben 10:37 Now it's from the inside out, but no- none could be truer than, than, than that story, and that's a Miami story. And when the Great Recession happened, the FDIC had to open an office in Florida because we had more bank closures than any other state, uh, in the union.

Joe Rogan 10:51 (laughs)

Billy Corben 10:51 'Cause we were like ... You could go down there, I mean, you could buy a fucking mortgage for your dog at a drive-through in Miami in the, in, like, the, the late '90s, early aughts. And, um, I remember interviewing a guy, um, u- we were doing, working on a project called Ponzi State, uh, about the state of Florida as, like, a, a case study in the Great Recession years ago. We never finished it, unfortunately. But we're interviewing this guy and he says, um, you know, "We were ..." And this is pre, like, Big Short. Like, this is before anybody sort of knew a lot about this, and he said, "We were down here in Miami setting fires, and Wall Street was trying to read our smoke signals." That's why I say, like, the Miami of today is the America of tomorrow.

Joe Rogan 11:31 (sighs) It is such a ... It, every time I go there, I always go, "I forgot how fucking crazy this place is."

Billy Corben 11:37 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 11:37 It, you really should have to have a passport.... it, it's-

Billy Corben 11:41 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 11:41 But I love it. I really do love it. It's a crazy place to do standup. You know, I, I, I, I did this joke, because I was doing a Netflix special. And I was doing it a couple months after I did this gig in Miami, and so I was using those Yondr bags. You know what those are? Where people have to put their cellphone-

Billy Corben 11:55 Yes.

Joe Rogan 11:55 ... into this magnetic bag.

Billy Corben 11:56 Right.

Joe Rogan 11:56 You keep the phone, but you hold the b- phone in the ... If you want to use it, you just have to step outside, they open up the bag, and they give you your phone. In every other city, it made for a better show, because people just sat down and watched the show. In Miami, it made for ... Literally 40% of the crowd, at any given time, was getting up and going to the back and y- using their phone and coming back in.

Billy Corben 12:18 Wow.

Joe Rogan 12:18 They were just constantly moving around and-

Billy Corben 12:20 You presume it was to use their phone. They might have been powdering their noses.

Joe Rogan 12:23 They might have been.

Billy Corben 12:24 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 12:24 But it was ... They, you know, th- there was ... Because I had done gigs before that, where they didn't have the Yondr bags and this wasn't the problem. But in Miami, just everybody needed to use their phones, so they just kept getting up and coming back and it was just chaos.

Billy Corben 12:36 Well, it's also a selfish town. Like, it's, it's basically-

Joe Rogan 12:39 Coke town.

Billy Corben 12:39 ... a town of assholes.

Joe Rogan 12:40 Yeah.

Billy Corben 12:40 I mean, really. And s- and so like I, I always say that ... I mean, it, it reflects in everything that we do, in the way that we behave, certainly in the way that we drive. Like, believe it or not, like, people are so much more chill and calm here-

Joe Rogan 12:52 (laughs)

Billy Corben 12:52 ... in traffic in LA. I swear to God. And LA was famous for, like, road rage, like-

Joe Rogan 12:56 Yeah.

Billy Corben 12:57 LA, like, m- uh, created, invented road rage. But, like, Miami, it's such a crazy, angry, weird place, 'cause it's like w- when push comes to shove, we're in Miami. Chill the fuck out. Like-

Joe Rogan 13:08 Yeah.

Billy Corben 13:08 ... it's, it's all good. It's a beautiful place. Like ... And it's a shared experience. Traffic sucks for all of us. Just chill out and use your turn signal, for crying out loud, and just ... But that's why they ... I say that's why they call it Miami. It's not-

Joe Rogan 13:21 Oh, right.

Billy Corben 13:21 ... our ammy or your ammy. It's my fucking ammy.

Joe Rogan 13:24 (laughs)

Billy Corben 13:24 And stay out of my fucking ammy. It's just, I don't know.

Joe Rogan 13:26 But you seem to love it. You seem to thrive.

Billy Corben 13:29 Yeah, I can't really function anywhere else. Uh-

Joe Rogan 13:32 (laughs)

Billy Corben 13:33 It doesn't make any sense.

Joe Rogan 13:34 That doesn't make any sense.

Billy Corben 13:35 It's ... And it's so frustrating, too. I, I was ... You know, I'm a native Floridian and a lifelong Miamian, and I ... For a while I was, I was pretty determined, um, to, like, leave behind a better Florida than the one I was-

Joe Rogan 13:47 Good luck. (laughs)

Billy Corben 13:47 ... I was born in. Fail. Big fail, dude.

Joe Rogan 13:51 You gotta give up, man.

Billy Corben 13:52 Like, what am I gonna do?

Joe Rogan 13:53 That culture is, like, so inexorably connected to cocaine. Um, one of my best friends, Steve Graham, was an ophthalmologist. He did his residency in Miami, so he did his residency in emergency rooms in Miami. And he was there in the '80s during, like, the height, b- basically during when Cocaine Cowboys takes place. And he saw everything, just ... He ... I mean, he had all these pictures of bullet holes and skull fragments and people with, uh, lightbulbs stuffed up their asses and just- (laughs)

Billy Corben 14:24 He said e- every day was just fucking chaos.

Joe Rogan 14:27 Yeah.

Billy Corben 14:27 So we called him- No Miami idea. Everywhere else a lightbulb goes off over your head. In Miami, we shove it right up our asses.

Joe Rogan 14:33 (laughs) He said they had to pull a lightbulb out of a guy's ass. In one of those, uh-

Billy Corben 14:37 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 14:37 ... ones that look like a Christmas tree. Those curly ones. This guy stuck a lightbulb up his ass-

Billy Corben 14:41 Well.

Joe Rogan 14:42 ... and it broke in his ass.

Billy Corben 14:43 At least he was concerned about the environment. That's, like, one of those environmentally, like, sound, like, good, like-

Joe Rogan 14:47 I don't think it is.

Billy Corben 14:47 Right? Is that-

Joe Rogan 14:47 There was no environmentally sound-

Billy Corben 14:49 At the time.

Joe Rogan 14:49 ... lightbulbs in the '80s.

Billy Corben 14:50 At the time, yeah.

Joe Rogan 14:50 They were just thicker glass, like-

Billy Corben 14:52 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 14:52 He felt like he could get it in his ass better.

Billy Corben 14:55 (laughs) Well, we ... Like, tho- that was the era to cut your teeth. If you were a cop or a lawyer-

Joe Rogan 15:00 Yeah.

Billy Corben 15:00 ... or a journalist or an ER doctor ... I remember talking to an E- ER doctor once. He tells me a story. 1980, shortly after the Mariel boatlift started, which I think everybody's kind of pop culture frame of reference for the Mariel boatlift is Scarface. Tony Montana was a Marielito. That's the beginning of the movie, when, you know, Castro is ranting and raving that he's flushing the toilets of Cuba onto the United States, specifically to Miami. And, um, so he was working at the, uh, the, uh, trauma center at Jackson Memorial, our emergency room, a- in Miami. And he said he got a Mariel refugee. These guys would stand on the beach. They would ... Um, it looked like Havana in South Beach. You know, like, there's that, like, coral seawall, and it's just like ... It had a really Havana vibe. So they would go, they would chill mostly at these flophouses south of 5th Street in Miami Beach, where, like, the cops would literally just ... They would be leaving after a stabbing at one of these places, and they'd be three blocks away, they'd get a call to go back, 'cause now there was a shooting or something else. They would be going there, like, a- all- around the clock. And so ... M- and they would just get in gunfights. Like, literally would just be like they'd ... Someone would cheat at dominoes and they would just pull out a gun and one guy would shoot the other guy. And so he has a Mariel refugee who comes in to the emergency room with a gunshot wound. And he knew Spanish, he was bilingual. He said to the guy, he said, "You're really lucky, 'cause if this bullet had hit, you know, a few centimeters or whatever this way, you would've died immediately. You would've bled out right there on the scene, died instantly." And guy splits. A few days later, another Mariel refugee comes in with a gunshot wound in exactly the same spot where he had told the other guy that if he got hit there, he would've died. Could never prove it, never was able to trace it back, but he was pretty well convinced that it was a revenge shooting-

Joe Rogan 16:48 Oh, wow.

Billy Corben 16:48 ... for the other shooting, and the guy knew exactly where to shoot him and kill him, because the doctor had told him-

Joe Rogan 16:54 Oh.

Billy Corben 16:54 ... where to do that. But that was like every day in Miami. Th- the lady who cuts my hair, for Christ's sake. She said, "Billy, I was so naive in those days." You know, you, you ... She's ... I cut people's hair, you know. They come over, kiss her goodbye and put a tip in her, in her pocket, you know. And she'd go home, turn her pockets inside out, have our little crumbled bills and everything. And one day, she finds a little baggy of white powder that someone, one of her clients had slipped into her pocket as a tip. And she said to her girlfriend, she goes, "What? What the hell is this?" And her friend said, "Oh shit, that's worth more than gold. That's the best tip you got (laughs) you got all day." (laughs) That little baggy. But that was just, like, the culture, and it's, and it's ... I mean, it's not that-

Joe Rogan 17:31 Imagine that anywhere else. Like, ima- imagine that in, like, Nebraska, someone tipping you in cocaine. People would be like, "What?"

Billy Corben 17:38 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 17:39 "Uh, what the f- What are you ... What the fuck are you doing?"

Billy Corben 17:43 ... listen, it's just like, like I said, it's like America's Casablanca. It's just like-

Joe Rogan 17:47 There's no place like it.

Billy Corben 17:48 No.

Joe Rogan 17:48 It's such a strange place.

Billy Corben 17:49 Yeah. Everybody is-

Joe Rogan 17:50 It's so strange.

Billy Corben 17:50 ... everything is for sale, still.

Joe Rogan 17:53 Yeah.

Billy Corben 17:53 Nothing, you know, and, and like I said, we are about a person old. That's how-

Joe Rogan 17:57 Mm.

Billy Corben 17:57 ... far back Miami goes.

Joe Rogan 17:59 I was watching a video about, um, the culture of renting super cars to people so that they can pretend that it's their car.

Billy Corben 18:07 Huge in Miami.

Joe Rogan 18:08 Yeah.

Billy Corben 18:08 Yeah. We got all these Brickell, Brickelleast 1000aires, you know, driving their rented fucking Lambos.

Joe Rogan 18:13 Yeah.

Billy Corben 18:14 You know, and blowing the engines out on South Beach because they don't know how to drive them. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 18:17 (laughs)

Billy Corben 18:18 So they're just getting towed down the street. It's just... (laughs) Listen, it's a fake until you make it kind of town. And there's nothing really to make there. You can't really, other than a real estate hustle, money laundering, drugs, politics, being a corrupt politician, there's really no other way to make it-

Joe Rogan 18:34 There's not a real industry.

Billy Corben 18:36 ... in Miami. No, not at all.

Joe Rogan 18:37 There's a lot of professional fighters come out of, uh, Miami. Out of that whole area, Coconut Grove and-

Billy Corben 18:43 A lot of aggression, a lot of poverty.

Joe Rogan 18:44 Yeah.

Billy Corben 18:44 It's a th- it's a third world economy down there. The disparity between the haves and the have-nots, the income gap is widest and getting wider in Miami-Dade County than just about any city in the country or any, any metropolitan area in the country.

Joe Rogan 19:00 Wow.

Billy Corben 19:00 So, and that's why I said, the Miami of today is the America of tomorrow. If you wanna know what challenges we'll face as a nation or calamities will befall us in the years to come, you need only look at, at Miami. TD Altman called it the canary in the coal mine, the bellwether. And so, you know, when, when, when the election was playing out, the cycle in 2016, I was like, you know, all my friends are just like, "This can't, this Trump thing can't happen." And I was like, "Hang on." I was like-

Joe Rogan 19:27 (sighs)

Billy Corben 19:27 ... Florida elected, and in fact reelected, Rick Scott to be governor. He is the biggest Medicare fraudster in the history of the United States. Everybody knows it. Everybody's aware of it. It's very well publicized. We've, we reelected him. Okay? We've, we, we elected him twice-

Joe Rogan 19:43 (laughs)

Billy Corben 19:43 ... as the top fucking executive in our state. Like, what makes you think-

Joe Rogan 19:48 (laughs)

Billy Corben 19:48 ... that the United States of America wouldn't do that? And I know it's fair to say, like, you know, if you're gonna be the governor of a state, you should know a little something about the largest industry in the state. Like, if you're gonna be the governor of Michigan, you should have some familiarity with the automobile industry and manufacturing. And in Florida, if you're gonna be the governor, arguably you should know something about our biggest industry, which is Medicare fraud basically. (laughs) I mean, you could argue that-

Joe Rogan 20:13 Really?

Billy Corben 20:13 ... he's the most qualified man for the job. Oh, yeah, we got like... Medicare fraud is, has, is one of the largest industries, has been for decades. I mean, we have billions and billions of dollars in fraud that just comes out.

Joe Rogan 20:25 How do they run it?

Billy Corben 20:25 So they run it... So you'll go into like Little Havana or Hialeah, for example, in a municipality in, in Miami-Dade, and there'll be a little abuelita sitting behind a desk half asleep. And she'll be surrounded in this tiny little one room office by little mailboxes. You know, like PO boxes.

Joe Rogan 20:43 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 20:44 And a mailman comes in every day and just puts checks in the boxes. And they're like... In some cases they've stolen, um, uh, social security numbers and, and cre- you know, uh, uh, stolen identities basically. And some cases they're just old people who aren't aware that their mail is being forwarded to this location. And they've just got... They... I think Miami for a while, we had more Medicare, uh, payments for HIV and AIDS medication than every other part of the country combined. And it's all just old people. So it's like you would have to assume that 100% of our elderly population suffered from HIV.

Joe Rogan 21:27 (laughs)

Billy Corben 21:27 Had HIV or were HIV positive. I mean, it's fucking impossible. You had female patients getting penis pumps that were paid for by-

Joe Rogan 21:33 What? (laughs)

Billy Corben 21:33 I didn't even know that Medicare covered that. I gotta look into that. But, uh... (laughs)

Joe Rogan 21:37 (laughs)

Billy Corben 21:38 But I didn't know that was a thing.

Joe Rogan 21:39 Well, they had a-

Billy Corben 21:39 Thanks, Obama. But... (laughs)

Joe Rogan 21:41 Did you watch the OxyContin Express? Did you see that documentary?

Billy Corben 21:43 I haven't seen it, no.

Joe Rogan 21:44 Where that's all about how they would have the pain c- management centers and they were connected to the pharmacies. You'd go to the doctor, "Hey, my back hurts." He'd go, "Well, you need this. Go right next door." And you just go right... All they would prescribe was oxys and they-

Billy Corben 21:56 So sometimes it wasn't even next door. Sometimes it was like, "Go to that window."

Joe Rogan 21:59 Yeah, right next door.

Billy Corben 22:00 And they'd say, "Show, show the doctor your X-ray."

Joe Rogan 22:04 Yeah.

Billy Corben 22:04 You'd have to get your X-ray done somewhere else 'cause they weren't doing it. So-

Joe Rogan 22:06 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 22:06 ... you'd hand the doctor your X-ray. He'd look at it and go, "Oh shit." If it was upside down he wouldn't-

Joe Rogan 22:10 (laughs)

Billy Corben 22:10 ... he wouldn't even care. He'd be like, "Oh yeah, oh shit, you, you know what you need? Go to that window over there-"

Joe Rogan 22:15 Yeah.

Billy Corben 22:15 "... and fill this prescription." And we had more pill mills, they called them, in Broward County, which is a county just north of Miami-Dade, than we had McDonald's locations. And there was literally like the Appalachian Trail. They were coming down-

Joe Rogan 22:31 Yeah.

Billy Corben 22:31 ... they were stocking up on Oxy, and we were fueling a death epidemic, like (laughs) in, in Kentucky. And they were pulling-

Joe Rogan 22:39 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 22:39 ... over more cars with Florida plates than in-state plates up there because Floridians were like, "Well shit, we can't let them have all the action. We'll drive up and we'll export the shit." And at the peak of the pill mill epidemic, the Oxy epidemic in Florida, seven people a day were dying, men, women and children. And f- and we subsist from hustle to hustle. You wonder why didn't the government crack down on that shit? Why didn't they regulate it? Well first, our governor, and we d- we deal with this in Screwball, is the biggest Medicare fraudster in the history of the country so he wasn't exactly, shall we say, vigilant or interested in cracking down on medical related fraud.

Joe Rogan 23:15 How does he get away with it?

Billy Corben 23:17 Magic. Mo- MAGA magic, I guess.

Joe Rogan 23:20 (laughs)

Billy Corben 23:20 I mean he... Listen, he, he, he got... He pled the Fifth Amendment like 75 times in a videotaped deposition. That was used in a campaign ad against him and Florida was like, "We're good. We're good with that." Uh, and he just... Listen, white rich men kind of walk between the raindrops in this country.

Joe Rogan 23:38 Mm.

Billy Corben 23:38 You know, it's just a...

Joe Rogan 23:40 Well sort of, they got Kraft for getting a hand job. That was Florida too.

Billy Corben 23:44 So stupid.

Joe Rogan 23:45 It's crazy.

Billy Corben 23:46 It's so stupid.

Joe Rogan 23:46 It's cool. Well, we were talking-

Billy Corben 23:47 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 23:47 ... about it, like, how does he not have a guy who can get him jerked off? Like, there's probably a lot of gals out there that would like to make some money. You don't, you don't have to go to a massage parlor.

Billy Corben 23:56 The biggest bummer of it is now my massage parlor's closed down.

Joe Rogan 23:59 (laughs)

Billy Corben 23:59 That's the problem. I, where do I go now-

Joe Rogan 24:01 That's a good question.

Billy Corben 24:01 ... is the problem? Where do broke guys go? (laughs)

Joe Rogan 24:04 Yeah. Well, the fact that they were filming you too, like, it's so... The whole thing is so strange.

Billy Corben 24:09 And, and if there was human trafficking going on there-

Joe Rogan 24:12 Right.

Billy Corben 24:12 ... what were the, what were the cops chilling there for, like, six months in some-

Joe Rogan 24:15 Right, right, right.

Billy Corben 24:15 ... ongoing investigations. Like, can you save these poor victims-

Joe Rogan 24:18 Yeah.

Billy Corben 24:18 ... if you... But human trafficking has become, like, this keyword.

Joe Rogan 24:21 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 24:21 It's like this new sort of, like, fearmongering kind of a term to get everybody all up in arms. And now, they're kind of backtracking on that. They're like, "Well, maybe it wasn't exactly-"

Joe Rogan 24:31 Oh, really?

Billy Corben 24:31 "... human trafficking." Maybe it was just more of-

Joe Rogan 24:33 That was the whole reason-

Billy Corben 24:34 ... a prostitution operation.

Joe Rogan 24:34 ... why he was a horrible person, because he was contributing to these people that were essentially being sold for sex slavery.

Billy Corben 24:40 Turns out that might've been a bit overblown. No-

Joe Rogan 24:42 Well-

Billy Corben 24:42 ... pun intended.

Joe Rogan 24:42 ... of c- blah.

Billy Corben 24:43 Overblown.

Joe Rogan 24:44 But, of course, that's kinda how they have to sell it, right? Otherwise, people are like, "Why are you wasting all this money on hand jobs?"

Billy Corben 24:50 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 24:50 "No one cares."

Billy Corben 24:50 You know why? Because solving real crime is hard.

Joe Rogan 24:53 Oh, and dangerous.

Billy Corben 24:54 And dangerous.

Joe Rogan 24:56 Yeah.

Billy Corben 24:56 Okay. So you can go and pick somebody up for marijuana or getting a hand job or whatever it is-

Joe Rogan 25:00 Yeah.

Billy Corben 25:00 ... and you can look like you're, you're being proactive.

Joe Rogan 25:03 Yeah.

Billy Corben 25:03 But solving a murder, s- that's hard, man. That's hard work.

Joe Rogan 25:07 Yeah. Hard, dangerous, and, you know, you, if you go to a weird little Asian massage place and guys are coming out smiling, you're like, "Hmm." It's, uh, you can start there.

Billy Corben 25:18 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 25:18 Yeah.

Billy Corben 25:18 You know? One-

Joe Rogan 25:18 Talk about low-hanging fruit.

Billy Corben 25:20 Really.

Joe Rogan 25:20 No offense to Kraft.

Billy Corben 25:21 Wah!

Joe Rogan 25:21 I mean, you know.

Billy Corben 25:22 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 25:22 That's probably, it's an older fellow.

Billy Corben 25:24 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 25:24 Starts hanging. Um, there was a, a weird law in Hawaii where they were letting cops actually have sex with prostitutes, like, to prove that they were prostitutes.

Billy Corben 25:33 I think-

Joe Rogan 25:34 (laughs)

Billy Corben 25:34 ... nearly half the states in the union have a law that allow police officers to have sex with people in custody.

Joe Rogan 25:42 What?

Billy Corben 25:42 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 25:43 Really?

Billy Corben 25:44 I- I can't make th- how did he make this shit up?

Joe Rogan 25:46 That's hilarious.

Billy Corben 25:46 Yeah. And they're saying, "Oh, well, it was consensual," bec-... I was like, "Consensual? They're in fucking handcuffs."

Joe Rogan 25:50 (laughs)

Billy Corben 25:50 "What do you mean it's consensual?" Like, what... That's human trafficking, if you ask me.

Joe Rogan 25:53 (gasps)

Billy Corben 25:53 I mean, not-

Joe Rogan 25:54 Well, yeah. And obviously, they're gonna try to make deals. "Hey, I'll suck your dick if you get me out of here," you know.

Billy Corben 26:00 Of course. And how is that, how is that consensual? How is that legal?

Joe Rogan 26:02 That's crazy.

Billy Corben 26:03 It's crazy.

Joe Rogan 26:03 Yeah, because the ultimate ho-... I mean, you talk about people holding power over people. That's the ultimate-

Billy Corben 26:08 It's kidnapping.

Joe Rogan 26:08 Yeah.

Billy Corben 26:08 Coerced consent, absolutely.

Joe Rogan 26:10 Yeah. I mean, that is, uh, that is more than an employer doing that to an employee.

Billy Corben 26:15 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 26:15 I mean, you're re- literally dangling their freedom.

Billy Corben 26:17 Talk about an abuse of power, seriously.

Joe Rogan 26:19 I just... Uh, look, I, I have all daughters. I'm n- I'm not... I don't want anybody's daughter to be a prostitute, but I'm also-

Billy Corben 26:27 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 26:27 ... 100% in favor of people being able to do whatever the fuck they want. And if someone's in a weird stage in their life where they'd rather jerk guys off than work at Denny's, like, who is anybody to stop them from doing that? The only problem is the social stigma that's attached to it. The actual act itself is it's beneficial. The, the person gets something out of it, you know? I mean, there, there's, it's p- some people have a really hard time getting someone to have sex with them, you know? It's... I don't see it that... It's just a crazy thing that we regulate something that... I mean, George Carlin had a great bit about it that it's the only thing where it's illegal to, to make someone pay for it, but it's fine if it's free. Like, it literally doesn't make sense. There's nothing wrong with sex, but there's something wrong with people paying for it.

Billy Corben 27:13 And it's fine if you pay for it and then videotape it-

Joe Rogan 27:15 Right.

Billy Corben 27:15 ... for distribution 'cause then-

Joe Rogan 27:17 Sure.

Billy Corben 27:18 ... that's porn.

Joe Rogan 27:18 Yeah.

Billy Corben 27:19 I- I don't really under- first of all, it's a contract between two consenting adults. If we, if we're talking about small government deregulation, let's allow two consenting adults to engage in a contractual relationship.

Joe Rogan 27:31 Yes.

Billy Corben 27:32 Offer, acceptance, consideration. As with anything else, the stigma, as you mentioned, a lot of that is part and parcel of the prohibition.

Joe Rogan 27:41 Yeah.

Billy Corben 27:41 The legality of it is what brings the seediness. It's what brings-

Joe Rogan 27:46 Yes.

Billy Corben 27:46 ... the danger.

Joe Rogan 27:46 Right.

Billy Corben 27:47 The- the... Because it's forced underground, uh, you, you introduce all of these elements that don't have to be there.

Joe Rogan 27:53 Exactly.

Billy Corben 27:53 They could take place in clean environments. They could take-

Joe Rogan 27:56 Yes.

Billy Corben 27:57 ... place... Instead of in the black market and underground, it could take place in a, uh, where you can protect all the participants-

Joe Rogan 28:03 Yes.

Billy Corben 28:03 ... involved. And it- it- it's... But it's been true of liquor. It's been true of marijuana. It's been true of, uh, prostitution, which they call, for a reason, the oldest profession.

Joe Rogan 28:15 Yeah.

Billy Corben 28:15 Um, uh, th- the second we introduce the prohibition, it creates a level of, of danger and a threat to society that wouldn't exist if you're like, "Well, wait. What if you just let me smoke this?"

Joe Rogan 28:28 Yeah.

Billy Corben 28:29 "What if you just let me drink this because I'm an adult making a responsible decision for myself? What if you just let me engage in sexual activity with this person who is perfectly willing to do it in exchange for some remuneration?"

Joe Rogan 28:40 Yeah.

Billy Corben 28:41 What the f-... Why should anybody give a shit about that?

Joe Rogan 28:43 It's so puritanical, and it's so archaic. It's such a dumb, proven bad idea.

Billy Corben 28:49 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 28:50 It's... I mean, it's been proven for decade upon decade. Uh, you go all the way back to the alcohol prohibition to what's going on right now with the cartels. I mean, what... How much would it fix if they made all drugs legal? How much would it fix? I mean, we'd, we'd have a real problem i- in the beginning with access where people... There would be so much more access. You'd probably, you know... We, you would lose people. People would die in high-profile overdose cases, and then-

Billy Corben 29:18 No, I don't think so.

Joe Rogan 29:18 ... people would try to make a deal out of it. You don't think-

Billy Corben 29:20 I-

Joe Rogan 29:21 ... that if cocaine was legal everywhere, that-

Billy Corben 29:23 No.

Joe Rogan 29:23 ... or meth?

Billy Corben 29:24 People can get...... the drugs.

Joe Rogan 29:27 Right. But it's not that easy for a person. Like, if you don't know anybody who's a criminal, like s- say if you wanna buy meth now.

Billy Corben 29:34 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 29:34 I don't know where to buy meth.

Billy Corben 29:35 I just, I know a few Walmarts in Florida that make it in the bathroom.

Joe Rogan 29:37 (laughs) I bet you do.

Billy Corben 29:39 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 29:39 But that, again, that is Florida.

Billy Corben 29:41 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 29:41 It's, it's a, it's a different animal.

Billy Corben 29:44 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 29:44 But, like, right now in America, uh, I mean, I maybe could f- s- drum up some meth in a few days if I started asking. But, uh, you know, I would not have any idea who's an informant and who's gonna rat me out.

Billy Corben 29:54 But I think the stats show in states where marijuana has become legal, you don't see significant spikes in usage. Uh, it's minimal.

Joe Rogan 30:01 Apparently there's, there's a, there's some significant spikes in usage, but the problem is it correlates to a significant spike in population of the state.

Billy Corben 30:10 Right.

Joe Rogan 30:10 Like, a lot of people moved to Colorado just because of marijuana.

Billy Corben 30:13 Right.

Joe Rogan 30:13 They moved to become a part of the business and because they just wanted to be free, you know. And then California, we've had medical weed forever, and now we have legal, legal weed. And, you know, it's, I don't think it's changed much here. But you do have, there's, there's some, there's some issues.

Billy Corben 30:28 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 30:28 There's, there's definitely ... I mean, I don't think it's beneficial in any way to sugarcoat the fact that having legal drugs makes people have more access to those drugs. Mean- means maybe there's gonna be a few people, whatever the number is, who do those drugs, who wouldn't have had access to them without it.

Billy Corben 30:44 I, but I agree, but I think it's de minimis.

Joe Rogan 30:47 Yes.

Billy Corben 30:47 I think it's like, I think ... A- and the number of people who could ... Who's gonna turn around and go like, "You know what I wanna try that's legal now?" Meth.

Joe Rogan 30:53 Meth. Yeah.

Billy Corben 30:54 My dentist doesn't recommend it, but I feel like it. Who the fuck's gonna do that, really?

Joe Rogan 30:57 You say that, but how many fucking people are on Adderall? And the only difference is-

Billy Corben 31:03 Yeah, that's good shit.

Joe Rogan 31:03 ... the doctor is prescribing it to you.

Billy Corben 31:05 That's really good shit.

Joe Rogan 31:06 Yeah.

Billy Corben 31:06 That's why the president pumps it.

Joe Rogan 31:07 Yeah. That's what I hear.

Billy Corben 31:07 Just saying.

Joe Rogan 31:08 The, do you think he does?

Billy Corben 31:09 (sniffs) He's always sniffing, and he always ... Well, here's the ... I don't think he's on cocaine, so-

Joe Rogan 31:13 No.

Billy Corben 31:13 And, and I always ascribe to people who don't, (laughs) who don't know what this is like, people on cocaine start one sentence and then finish another.

Joe Rogan 31:22 Right. (laughs)

Billy Corben 31:22 That's what it's like talking to some, someone on cocaine, or the president.

Joe Rogan 31:25 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 31:25 They just, but I don't think he's on bl- And, but he's always, you always hear him with the-

Joe Rogan 31:29 Yeah.

Billy Corben 31:29 ... with the sn- I think he's, like, bumping Addy. I don't know what else the-

Joe Rogan 31:31 I don't think he's bumping it, but I think he's definitely pr- Well, he might be.

Billy Corben 31:35 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 31:35 Why am I saying that he's not? I mean, he's a-

Billy Corben 31:37 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 31:37 ... he's a wild man. But he's definitely got, uh, accusations from his past about use of amphetamines.

Billy Corben 31:44 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 31:44 There was, uh, there was a journalist that actually detailed the very Duane Reade pharmacy where he used to get this prescription diet medication there. Air quotes, "diet" medication-

Billy Corben 31:56 Diet medication.

Joe Rogan 31:56 ... which is fucking speed.

Billy Corben 31:57 Right.

Joe Rogan 31:58 And look, the guy has an exorbitant amount of energy. I mean, it's quite impressive-

Billy Corben 32:03 It is.

Joe Rogan 32:03 ... for a man in his 70s who eats shit-

Billy Corben 32:06 Yeah. His diet, man. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 32:06 ... and doesn't exercise. And he's always ready to go. I mean, when he was campaigning, he didn't seem to ever get tired. He would go and do these campaign events, and he would always be talking, and he'd be full of enthusiasm, "We're gonna make America great again. We're gonna build that wall higher. We're gonna tell those Chinese, 'Listen, motherfucker.'"

Billy Corben 32:22 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 32:22 Like, he was, I mean, it's an incredible amount of energy.

Billy Corben 32:26 God bless him. He's what, 70 some odd years old?

Joe Rogan 32:28 I, uh, it's amazing that you don't have to drug test him. It's amazing. You could drug test the-

Billy Corben 32:33 But baseball players-

Joe Rogan 32:33 Right.

Billy Corben 32:34 But baseball players.

Joe Rogan 32:35 Yes. Exactly.

Billy Corben 32:35 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 32:35 That's what I was gonna say.

Billy Corben 32:36 They're, they're the guys we need to ... And w- what, I mean, what is Adderall-

Joe Rogan 32:40 I would not-

Billy Corben 32:40 ... if not a performance enhancing drug? Totally.

Joe Rogan 32:42 100%. Talk to journalists. How many journalists will be totally honest about it? They are fucking hooked on Adderall, and they're very productive with it.

Billy Corben 32:51 Very productive.

Joe Rogan 32:51 Yeah.

Billy Corben 32:52 I, I tried it once. It's wild.

Joe Rogan 32:54 Somebody gave me some, I didn't try it. I just sat there and looked at it, and I go, "I don't need that in my life."

Billy Corben 32:58 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 32:58 I've been scared of coke. I've never done coke, and-

Billy Corben 33:00 Neither have I.

Joe Rogan 33:00 ... I've never done Adderall. I don't fuck with speed because I can't shut the fuck up already.

Billy Corben 33:03 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 33:04 I'm like, "That is not for me." I need something that calms me down and makes me w- feel weird.

Billy Corben 33:08 I feel like I'd be that guy who, like, does it the first time and my heart explodes out of my chest. You'd be, like, scraping me off the roof with a shovel-

Joe Rogan 33:14 Jesus.

Billy Corben 33:14 ... you know, if I did cocaine.

Joe Rogan 33:15 Right, right. 'Cause it's so high energy.

Billy Corben 33:16 Yeah. I was like, "Jesus, I can't do that."

Joe Rogan 33:18 I'm worried that I would love it.

Billy Corben 33:19 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 33:20 That's what I'm worried.

Billy Corben 33:21 That's a good concern.

Joe Rogan 33:21 I'm worried I would love it, and I'd be like, "Okay, from here on out, it's all about me." You know? (laughs)

Billy Corben 33:27 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 33:28 Which, which marijuana does the opposite to me.

Billy Corben 33:30 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 33:30 Marijuana is like, "Yeah, we, we could all be cool together." You know?

Billy Corben 33:34 I finally tried pot.

Joe Rogan 33:35 Yeah?

Billy Corben 33:35 I finally tried it.

Joe Rogan 33:36 Finally? When happened?

Billy Corben 33:37 Yeah. I never, I never tr- I never tried it before. But no, I was, I was actually, um ... Years ago, I was in Colorado, 4/20, backstage at a Snoop concert.

Joe Rogan 33:46 Oh, jeez, you have to try it.

Billy Corben 33:48 I didn't have to because I was secondhand stoned, dude.

Joe Rogan 33:50 Oh.

Billy Corben 33:51 It's like, it's like fucking-

Joe Rogan 33:52 So that's how you tried it.

Billy Corben 33:53 It's like, it's like when I, (laughs) when I go to church with Coco. I mean, I-

Joe Rogan 33:56 (laughs)

Billy Corben 33:56 You just get, you're just hot boxed, you know?

Joe Rogan 33:58 Right, right, right.

Billy Corben 33:58 Like, I literally was in the-

Joe Rogan 33:59 People's ... Church with Coco, for people who don't understand what we're saying, Church of What's Happening Now! podcast with Joey Diaz.

Billy Corben 34:05 Yeah. That's right. I didn't, I didn't-

Joe Rogan 34:05 You're abbreviating.

Billy Corben 34:06 Right. I di- I didn't mean that I actually went-

Joe Rogan 34:08 Yeah.

Billy Corben 34:08 ... to, like, a Santeria church.

Joe Rogan 34:09 Right, right, right. (laughs)

Billy Corben 34:09 And sacrificed a chicken. Although, we have done that in Miami. When he's out in Miami, all bets are off-

Joe Rogan 34:13 Right.

Billy Corben 34:14 ... when Joey's down. But, like, uh, like, I'm in the middle of a story on his podcast (laughs) , and I fucking forgot the, to set the end-

Joe Rogan 34:21 (laughs)

Billy Corben 34:22 ... of the story. I literally, like, I told it, and I, like, ended it. And then only the next day (laughs) did I go, "I never told them the end of that story."

Joe Rogan 34:29 Yeah.

Billy Corben 34:29 "I fucking forgot it." But, so someone says, "Uh, Snoop, Snoop wants to meet you. He's in his dressing room," backstage at this concert. So, I go, "Fuck yeah, I'm gonna go meet Snoop. Are you kidding?" So, I open the door to this backstage area. Dude, I can't see my hand in front of me.

Joe Rogan 34:45 Ugh. (laughs)

Billy Corben 34:46 I can't see my hand in front ... It is foggy f- I, like-

Joe Rogan 34:49 Ooh.

Billy Corben 34:49 I was like eeh, eeh, eeh, eeh. Like I had to get like-

Joe Rogan 34:52 (laughs)

Billy Corben 34:52 ... windshield wipers on my fucking glass. Like, I can't see shit. And I'm, I'm wondering ... And I got maybe halfway down the hall.

Joe Rogan 34:58 Oh.

Billy Corben 34:58 And I was like, "I can't, I can't, I can't."

Joe Rogan 35:00 (laughs)

Billy Corben 35:00 I turn around, and was ... And I bolted out the door. I was like, "Ha, ha." You know, just panting on my hands and knees. I was like, "I can't do it." And so I couldn't go back. So, the, the next year, like, two years later, I'm back in, in Colorado. And everybody, 'cause everybody was making fun of me. 'Cause they're like, "You went to Colorado and didn't smoke?" They're like, "That's like going to Italy and not eating pasta." You know? I was like, "Okay, next time. Next time." So I go out, and I try it. And I was like ... All I kept saying was, "I wish I was drunk. I wish I was drunk."I wish I was jo- (laughs) I just, I don't know. It was like a bad... I just, it was so antisocial. I felt so weird. I felt so sort of introverted. And I was unfortunately in like a, they have this pot smoking church in Denver.

Joe Rogan 35:41 Whoa.

Billy Corben 35:41 Yeah. It's like you go and you can just smoke pot, and it's literally in this old church. They got beautiful paintings on the wall. It's crazy. It's trippy. And so I was there, and I tried it and I was like-

Joe Rogan 35:52 How much did you smoke?

Billy Corben 35:53 Not a lot.

Joe Rogan 35:54 Two hits?

Billy Corben 35:55 Two, three.

Joe Rogan 35:56 Yeah. That's too much.

Billy Corben 35:57 Is that too much?

Joe Rogan 35:57 Yeah.

Billy Corben 35:58 For a, for a lightweight?

Joe Rogan 35:59 You want a... I would, if I was your, your friend and I wa- Well, I am your friend, but if I was right next to you at the time, I'd say, "Little baby hit, Billy. Just a little baby hit. Don't get crazy."

Billy Corben 36:06 Come on, B.

Joe Rogan 36:06 "Just like this. (inhales) That's all I want. Just (inhales and exhales deeply) and then let's just relax. Don't get cra- Don't take it when it comes back around again."

Billy Corben 36:12 Right.

Joe Rogan 36:12 "It's too mu- It's too goddamn strong today."

Billy Corben 36:15 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 36:15 "It's not what it used to be." I was in, uh, very recently in Austin, Texas. And Texas still has regular weed.

Billy Corben 36:23 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 36:23 It's very good weed, but it's regular weed.

Billy Corben 36:25 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 36:25 Like you could smoke it and you're like, "I'm here. Everything's fine."

Billy Corben 36:28 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 36:28 California, no longer. These motherfuckers right here, these little backwoods. (weed ball shaking) That, Jesus, that is not regular weed. That's got a glass tip and that will put you on the fucking moon. Brian Callen had one hit of it last week, he couldn't drive himself home.

Billy Corben 36:41 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 36:41 Hours later, hours later, he was still here, hanging out.

Billy Corben 36:45 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 36:46 Yeah. He's like, "I can't go."

Billy Corben 36:46 He's still here now. It w- right? (laughs)

Joe Rogan 36:47 (laughs)

Narrator 36:47 Brian, another Callen on the wax.

Joe Rogan 36:48 "I'm awake, I'm awake."

Billy Corben 36:50 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 36:50 Yeah. (laughs) H- he had to get, uh, my friend Brendan to come and get him. Yeah.

Billy Corben 36:54 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 36:54 He just couldn't drive. (laughs)

Billy Corben 36:56 That's awesome. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 36:56 It's fucking strong, man.

Billy Corben 36:58 But, but there's also different shit. So next time I did it, I did something... Someone said, "You know what? Maybe you should try something else."

Joe Rogan 37:03 Yeah. Sativa versus indica.

Billy Corben 37:05 Yeah. I tried it. Second time, laughed my ass off. I was with funny friends.

Joe Rogan 37:08 Oh, okay.

Billy Corben 37:09 And I had a fucking blast.

Joe Rogan 37:11 Yeah.

Billy Corben 37:11 So I don't know what I did or shouldn't have done or should do or shouldn't do, but it was, I had a lot of fun.

Joe Rogan 37:16 Yeah. Sativa is more, um, you're thinking more, it's a little bit-

Billy Corben 37:21 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 37:21 You have a little bit more energy. Indica crushes you.

Billy Corben 37:24 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 37:24 You're just like, "Oh my God, I gotta go somewhere and lie down. I can't handle this." Uh, it's, it's, but it's different for different people as well.

Billy Corben 37:32 But I'll tell you, that Chick-fil-A tasted damn good that night.

Joe Rogan 37:35 Oh, it tasted way better, right?

Billy Corben 37:36 Hate, hate tastes great, I gotta tell you.

Joe Rogan 37:38 Hate?

Billy Corben 37:38 Hate tastes great. I mean... (laughs)

Joe Rogan 37:40 It's more ignorance than hate-

Billy Corben 37:41 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 37:41 ... but I see what you're saying. Yeah.

Billy Corben 37:43 Thank you.

Joe Rogan 37:43 I had to explain to my kids why it's closed on Sunday.

Billy Corben 37:46 (sighs)

Joe Rogan 37:46 They w- were driving by, "How come no one's there?" I go, "Because it's the baby Jesus's day."

Billy Corben 37:51 Okay. If you really wanna celebrate the baby Jesus, though-

Joe Rogan 37:54 Right.

Billy Corben 37:55 ... just hear me out. I watch a lot of TBN because I'm a lunatic and I like, I, I always wondered like if the Jews were on television all the time, if we were on television going like, "Send us money," what would they say about us?

Joe Rogan 38:08 Right.

Billy Corben 38:08 But for some reason, I don't know why, Jesus needs a lot of money because they're always on TV telling you to send your money to Jesus, right? So I'm thinking, if you really want to do something for Jesus, Chick-fil-A, open on Sunday and donate all of your revenue to Jesus-

Joe Rogan 38:24 Mm.

Billy Corben 38:25 ... to churches.

Joe Rogan 38:25 Yeah.

Billy Corben 38:26 And all the af- Think of the money, just the after church crowd alone.

Joe Rogan 38:29 Mm.

Billy Corben 38:29 Everybody would flock, no pun intended, right to the Chick-fil-A and stock up and they'd have all their m- They could even have people volunteer to work those days and donate all your money to Jesus because he apparently needs... I don't know what he needs with it, but he needs a lot of money.

Joe Rogan 38:45 Well, I don't know if the Chick-fil-A guys, the people who own it, are of the same ilk as the Trinity Broadcast Network folks.

Billy Corben 38:52 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 38:52 Because those TBN folks, (stutters) I don't think you're being mean by saying they're shysters. You know, they're-

Billy Corben 39:00 No, straight up.

Joe Rogan 39:00 Yeah. They're just-

Billy Corben 39:01 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 39:01 They're just stealing money from people. I think that Chick-fil-A guy is like a legitimately religious person who really truly believes that he's saving the world from gay folk marrying each other. Yeah, it's not-

Billy Corben 39:12 MAGA, bro. MAGA.

Joe Rogan 39:13 It's... MAGA. Well, it's- MAGA, bro. It's not logical, but they make a goddamn good chicken sandwich.

Billy Corben 39:19 They make a goddamn good... Hate tastes great.

Joe Rogan 39:20 It's quite, quite tasty.

Billy Corben 39:21 Man, I'm telling you.

Joe Rogan 39:22 Again, I think it's-

Billy Corben 39:23 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 39:23 ... more ignorance than hate, but I feel you.

Billy Corben 39:25 Does it rhyme?

Joe Rogan 39:25 Yeah.

Billy Corben 39:25 Just does ignorance taste great?

Joe Rogan 39:27 Hate tastes great. Right.

Billy Corben 39:27 It doesn't, uh, it doesn't, it doesn't rhyme-

Joe Rogan 39:28 Yeah.

Billy Corben 39:28 ... but I, but like, I don't know. And they, they had this lunatic on, he's on all the time. They're, they're paid half-hour shows, but this Peter Popoff guy-

Joe Rogan 39:37 Oh, yeah.

Billy Corben 39:38 ... with the fucking miracle spring water.

Joe Rogan 39:39 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 39:40 The prosperity-

Joe Rogan 39:41 Yeah.

Billy Corben 39:41 ... the prosperity preachers.

Joe Rogan 39:43 Yep. Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 39:43 Talk about a fucking bill of goods man.

Joe Rogan 39:45 Sad.

Billy Corben 39:46 You know that k- th- th- th- that guy Creflo Dollar. His name is fucking Creflo.

Joe Rogan 39:50 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 39:50 I'm guessing-

Joe Rogan 39:50 Yeah.

Billy Corben 39:51 ... that's not his Christian name, but it's his, but it's his evangelical name is Creflo Dollar.

Joe Rogan 39:54 I gotta think he made that name up, right?

Billy Corben 39:56 I would, I would hope so.

Joe Rogan 39:57 That's-

Billy Corben 39:57 That was, that was the dude, you tweeted about him years ago, that was the dude who was out in the world getting donations because he needed to update or upgrade his G4-

Joe Rogan 40:07 Yeah.

Billy Corben 40:07 ... to a G6.

Joe Rogan 40:08 (laughs)

Billy Corben 40:09 And I was like, "G6 Christ." This fucking-

Joe Rogan 40:12 (laughs)

Billy Corben 40:12 This guy. He was going, he's saying, "I need donate because I need to spread the gospel."

Joe Rogan 40:16 Yeah.

Billy Corben 40:16 "And so you need to give me money so that, because my G4 just ain't cutting it anymore, I need to upgrade."

Joe Rogan 40:22 Oh. Amazing.

Billy Corben 40:22 I was, I wish, I wish he had gotten a 737 Max 8, but that's just me.

Joe Rogan 40:26 It's just, it's just so amazing that that hustle still works. But the, the, the prosperity ones are so gross because they go after people that are so poor and destitute that they can't pay their bills and they tell them, "If you just send me money, God will pay you back tenfold. And I know what you're saying, you don't have any money, but you do. You do. You take that money, you send it to Jesus, and Jesus will bring prope- prosperity in your life." And then they have all these folks that are giving testimonials about how, "I was down on my luck. I didn't have money for rent. I didn't have money for food. But I knew that Jesus needed this money. So I sent Jesus the money-"

Billy Corben 41:00 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 41:00 "... and Jesus paid me back tenfold and now my life is filled with joy and prosperity."

Billy Corben 41:06 Am I being hateful when I say that that is what religion preys on? The, the, the-

Joe Rogan 41:12 Well, not all religion.

Billy Corben 41:13 ... weak, the poor, the-

Joe Rogan 41:14 No. I don't think-

Billy Corben 41:14 ... people searching for answers.

Joe Rogan 41:16 Yeah. But I think for some people there's like, I mean this is older, wiser me, right? When I was younger, I would agree with you 100%, but I think at this point, I think there's some benefit to like having...... community, and having this environment where everybody goes to be humbled. And every- everybody goes to agree that they're gonna be good people that follow the ethics of Jesus. And you put a little money in the dish and, you know, they have to keep the operation running. And there's a lo- I think there's a lot of churches that do a lot of good. But, I think for every one or two that do a lot of good, there's these motherfuckers that are just stealing money and driving Rolls-Royces-

Billy Corben 41:55 Hypocrites, just hypocrites.

Joe Rogan 41:56 ... and living in giant fucking castles, you know. Like, that Joel, whatever his name is, what's that guy's name?

Billy Corben 42:02 Osteen.

Joe Rogan 42:02 Yeah, that guy.

Billy Corben 42:03 In Houston.

Joe Rogan 42:04 That motherfucker, he owns a huge arena. He, they, they do this show in the... And, and he caught a rash of shit when he didn't let all the hurricane victims stay in his place.

Billy Corben 42:13 (laughs) Yeah. He, he was holed up in his $10 million, uh, mansion at the time, yeah.

Joe Rogan 42:17 I'd be amazed if it was only 10 million.

Billy Corben 42:19 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 42:19 You know?

Billy Corben 42:19 Well, it's not his only property.

Joe Rogan 42:21 Yeah.

Billy Corben 42:21 You know? I mean, it's just-

Joe Rogan 42:22 Well, sure. It's just-

Billy Corben 42:22 He has several houses.

Joe Rogan 42:23 It's just so-

Billy Corben 42:24 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 42:24 ... distorted. The, the, the whole idea of it all is so distorted. But, I think, I think there's a lot of community churches that do a lot of good, where they, they provide people with comfort. And, uh, you know, it doesn't ne- necessarily have to make any sense. And it doesn't-

Billy Corben 42:38 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 42:38 ... make any sense. But it provides them with comfort.

Billy Corben 42:41 I appreciate... Like, I, I respect people of faith. I think it must feel wonderful.

Joe Rogan 42:45 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 42:45 I don't know how it feels, but I th- it must be wonderful to believe in something-

Joe Rogan 42:49 Yeah.

Billy Corben 42:50 ... like that, so devoutly, without any evidence, without any i- indication or proof whatsoever that what you so firmly believe in is true. But, it's the hypocrisy of it that I just can't abide by.

Joe Rogan 43:02 Right, like these prosperity guys, yeah.

Billy Corben 43:04 And, like the-

Joe Rogan 43:04 Yeah.

Billy Corben 43:04 ... prosperity guys. Like people who used to have a, or claimed to have some kind of holier-than-thou moral code.

Joe Rogan 43:13 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 43:14 That now think, like, the pimp president's cool.

Joe Rogan 43:16 Right. (laughs)

Billy Corben 43:16 It's like, I get it, but like, but your whole thing was like, that Bill Clinton was the biggest scumbag in the world.

Joe Rogan 43:22 Right, right.

Billy Corben 43:22 And he needed to be impeached and-

Joe Rogan 43:23 Yeah.

Billy Corben 43:23 ... castrated and-

Joe Rogan 43:24 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 43:25 But like, let's have some consistency. It's the hypocrisy that I can't abide by.

Joe Rogan 43:28 Well-

Billy Corben 43:28 Let's have some consistency is all.

Joe Rogan 43:30 Well, particularly with Trump, because Trump was a, uh, not in this is not a knock on him, but he was a lifelong Democrat. I mean, he only-

Billy Corben 43:37 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 43:37 ... really became a Republican when he thought about running for president.

Billy Corben 43:41 Yeah, and he was an Independent for a minute-

Joe Rogan 43:43 Yeah.

Billy Corben 43:43 ... then he was a Democrat again, then he was a Republican, yeah.

Joe Rogan 43:45 It's a pure hustle. I mean, the, the-

Billy Corben 43:47 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 43:47 ... glass has been cleaned and squeegeed, and you could see right through it.

Billy Corben 43:51 That's why it works on the evangelicals, that's what I'm saying.

Joe Rogan 43:53 Yes, right.

Billy Corben 43:54 That's their whole-

Joe Rogan 43:54 Yes.

Billy Corben 43:55 He's, he's, he's like the pimp Joel O- Osteen.

Joe Rogan 43:57 Yeah.

Billy Corben 43:57 Like, he's like... That's what it is.

Joe Rogan 43:59 Well, this-

Billy Corben 44:00 He found his hustle.

Joe Rogan 44:01 Yeah, and I don't wanna be mean about this, but I think it's accurate, that there's, there's a level of intellect that just subscribes to that kind of stuff that... Like, I had a friend, she was in the Mormon church for a long time. And she left the church, but she was really honest about it. She said, "I have a problem that I'm susceptible to bullshit." Like, she's suscep- Because she grew up a fundamentalist. And so, she's susceptible to, you know, to, like, yoga type people, like, "Oh-

Billy Corben 44:33 Gurus, yeah.

Joe Rogan 44:33 ... the crystals and the, the light."

Billy Corben 44:36 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 44:36 "Feel the light." She's susceptible to all that shit. And she would recognize-

Billy Corben 44:40 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 44:40 ... her susceptibility, but she was re- being really honest about it, you know. That she's like, "I have a real problem. I grew up believing something that doesn't make any sense, and I believed it wholeheartedly." And she goes, "And that sort of formulated a big part of how I ascertain what is accurate in the world." So, she's left with these, like, ch- l- uh, childlike skills of, of being able to discern what's bullshit and what's a hustle. She's like a little kid.

Billy Corben 45:08 I have a great amount of respect for people who grow up in a cult and-

Joe Rogan 45:11 (laughs)

Billy Corben 45:13 ... who can m- make their way out of it.

Joe Rogan 45:14 Mm.

Billy Corben 45:14 I mean, can you imagine when you're a child-

Joe Rogan 45:16 Yeah.

Billy Corben 45:17 ... that you're most impressionable and, and you're steeped in that.

Joe Rogan 45:20 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 45:20 That's all you know.

Joe Rogan 45:21 Yeah.

Billy Corben 45:21 Like, you don't know that there is an alternate perspective and, uh, and you're able to grow up and say, "Oh, wait, there's a whole big-

Joe Rogan 45:30 Yeah.

Billy Corben 45:31 ... world out there, maybe I'm not being told the truth." Uh, that's incredibly powerful.

Joe Rogan 45:34 It is.

Billy Corben 45:35 It's really hard, I think-

Joe Rogan 45:36 Oh, yeah.

Billy Corben 45:36 ... for, to break with the only thinking that you've ever known in your life. I think it's amazing.

Joe Rogan 45:41 It's one of the ha- Probably one of the hardest things that a grown adult has to do, is to recognize that the paradigm, this, this, this framework they've been living their life under is utt- utter horseshit. And it's like... I mean, the Mormon one is so crazy too, 'cause it's like, the f- the results are great, the people are so nice.

Billy Corben 45:59 Yeah. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 46:00 Like, they're the nicest cult members of all time.

Billy Corben 46:02 That's true. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 46:02 But then you go back and look at the actual framework of the religion itself, you're like, "Wait a minute, wait a minute, he was 14?" You're like, "Hold on, Joseph Smith was 14 in 1820 when he found golden tablets that contained the lost work of Jesus, and only he could read 'em, 'cause he had a magic rock?"

Billy Corben 46:20 But like, that's Judaism and Catholicism. It's all, they're all-

Joe Rogan 46:24 Yeah, but the guy-

Billy Corben 46:24 ... crazy mythological horseshit.

Joe Rogan 46:26 But they know who the guy was. Like, I mean, he's so recent.

Billy Corben 46:29 Too re- It's too... Well, that's the thing, is that-

Joe Rogan 46:31 Yeah.

Billy Corben 46:31 ... you know it's a l- It's like Scientology, it's like-

Joe Rogan 46:32 Yes.

Billy Corben 46:33 ... "Well, we know it's a lie." As-

Joe Rogan 46:34 Scientology's even crazier.

Billy Corben 46:35 Well, a science fiction writer-

Joe Rogan 46:36 Yeah.

Billy Corben 46:37 ... literally s- was-

Joe Rogan 46:38 Yeah.

Billy Corben 46:38 ... a failed, a failed science fiction writer.

Joe Rogan 46:40 A terrible writer.

Billy Corben 46:41 Terrible, failed science fiction writer.

Joe Rogan 46:43 That motherfucker never made a second draft in his life.

Billy Corben 46:46 No. And one day said, "The r- If you wanna make real money, start a religion."

Joe Rogan 46:50 Yeah.

Billy Corben 46:50 That is his greatest quote.

Joe Rogan 46:51 Yeah. And then he did.

Billy Corben 46:53 And he t- and did it.

Joe Rogan 46:53 And then he did it.

Billy Corben 46:54 God bless him. Can't knock his hustle.

Joe Rogan 46:56 (laughs)

Billy Corben 46:56 People wanna buy into that.

Joe Rogan 46:57 But what's amazing, that-

Billy Corben 46:58 How are your thetans?

Joe Rogan 46:59 ... in 2019, it's still rocking.

Billy Corben 47:02 I-

Joe Rogan 47:02 In some way.

Billy Corben 47:02 God bless him.

Joe Rogan 47:03 I mean-

Billy Corben 47:03 It, it is.

Joe Rogan 47:04 Even after all those documentaries, even after-

Billy Corben 47:06 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 47:06 ... the Leah Remini show-

Billy Corben 47:07 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 47:07 ... all these things just-

Billy Corben 47:09 They go out in the world, they tell everybody it's horseshit, and then a brand new Scientology center opens in Miami. I'm like, "Seriously?"

Joe Rogan 47:14 Really?

Billy Corben 47:15 We know, we already know.

Joe Rogan 47:15 A brand new one opened?

Billy Corben 47:17 We already know.

Joe Rogan 47:17 Some people don't know.

Billy Corben 47:18 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 47:18 The people who don't know are never gonna know, that's what it is.

Billy Corben 47:22 Right.

Joe Rogan 47:22 It's like you're going... If, if, you know, if, if you wanna put in a money t- Like, some people have $100, some people have $5. And this is like, f- intellectually. Some people have a lot of room to work with, some people don't. They just d- Their brain doesn't work as good. Just like some people have poor genetics when it comes to their ability to run fast, some people have really shitty brain development genetics.

Billy Corben 47:47 Let me ask you this, 'cause obviously y- you would have sympathy for someone who was taken advantage of or swindled-

Joe Rogan 47:53 Mm. Sure.

Billy Corben 47:53 ... or the victim of a con, con person.And, how much sympathy do you have for the gleefully ignorant, or the willfully ignorant? Meaning like-

Joe Rogan 48:03 Right.

Billy Corben 48:03 ... the information is there, it's available. Before I give Scientology my money, I could just, I don't know, Google it.

Joe Rogan 48:10 Right.

Billy Corben 48:11 How, how much sympathy do you have for, like, the willfully ignorant, people who, who sort of ... Uh, uh, it's, it's like the fucking dude from, uh, Airplane. They bought their tickets.

Joe Rogan 48:19 Yeah.

Billy Corben 48:19 They knew what they were getting into.

Joe Rogan 48:20 Yeah.

Billy Corben 48:20 I say let them crash, you know? Like-

Joe Rogan 48:23 Well, I'm a big fan of Willie D from the Getto Boys, and he has a quote that I always like to use. "You gotta let a hoe be a hoe." And I think in that sense, like, you gotta let dummies get fleeced. It's just part of ... And part of it is there for us to see. Part of it is there for you to go, "What? They gave away all their money?"

Billy Corben 48:42 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 48:42 "Aw, shit."

Billy Corben 48:44 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 48:44 Like, there's something to that. It's, it, it benefits us. Like, I'm not a fan of these videos where kids try to skateboard off the side of a building and they slip and fall and land on their head, and everybody's like, "Oh, shit."

Billy Corben 48:56 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 48:56 But, but those videos serve a purpose. And that purpose is not everybody gets to do the handstand on the side of the building and survive.

Billy Corben 49:04 Right.

Joe Rogan 49:04 Some people fall and they land on their fucking head and they're never the same again.

Billy Corben 49:07 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 49:08 And then they, they're left with, like, a third grader's IQ for the rest of their life. That's real, man.

Billy Corben 49:13 (laughs) So it's George Carlin's bit about, you know, the kid who swallows the most marbles doesn't get to grow up and have kids of his own. That's how it's supposed to work.

Joe Rogan 49:20 Yeah.

Billy Corben 49:21 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 49:21 Unfortunately, it sucks if it's your kid.

Billy Corben 49:24 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 49:25 But it's all of us are experiencing this life together. And there's some folks that are just, they're gonna do a shitty job of it. And part of me thinks that because there is no utopia, right? There is no, uh, enlightened people. There's no one civilization that's got it all nailed and everybody gets along together and everyone's totally fine with every single choice everybody makes, 'cause everybody's-

Billy Corben 49:49 Have you ever been to Waffle House?

Joe Rogan 49:50 I have.

Billy Corben 49:50 That's, that's, that's a utopia.

Joe Rogan 49:51 It's close.

Billy Corben 49:53 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 49:53 Depending on how drunk you are.

Billy Corben 49:54 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 49:55 Because of that, I think we operate under this, uh, this weird system where you've got to see the failures in order to recognize that failure is possible. I think there's a ... There's actual community benefit to people fucking up. And there's some community benefit to people getting fleeced.

Billy Corben 50:12 Listen, I, I always say that I ... First of all, I don't believe anybody that says, any artist or anybody out, out in the world creating something and putting it out there for people to react to it, I don't believe anyone who says they don't read their reviews, so their own reviews. I read all of the reviews, and I, I read the bad ones twice.

Joe Rogan 50:32 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 50:32 'Cause that's where you learn the most. They could be right, they could be wrong, but-

Joe Rogan 50:36 Right.

Billy Corben 50:36 ... I, I feel like, uh, you just ... It's where you fuck up that, like, you, you learn the most-

Joe Rogan 50:43 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 50:43 ... from it. And, and I think, I feel like as a white man in America, all the time I have to keep myself in check, the way you were describing earlier about how, like, you know, what if you just come to realize that maybe the world isn't exactly the way you perceive it.

Joe Rogan 50:55 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 50:56 And that maybe there's a lot of other people who have very different experiences from the ones that you have. And so maybe the reality of the world is, is different for those people.

Joe Rogan 51:03 Sure.

Billy Corben 51:03 And you can be a more enlightened person by being more empathetic and trying to understand those perspectives, trying to walk, you know, a mile in their shoes. And I just feel like, uh, I've learned so much more from the mistakes that I've made and the failures that I've had, certainly than any of the successes. I, I have, in my home, I have no ... I have movie posters, but they're, like, art. They're other people's movies. You know, I have none of my own movie posters at home. That's, that's, that's at the office. That's not what home is for, you know?

Joe Rogan 51:29 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 51:29 Except I had one for a while. I had one poster of one of my movies that I hung in the bathroom over the toilet-

Joe Rogan 51:36 (laughs)

Billy Corben 51:36 ... 'cause it was the l- my least favorite, and I just wanted to be reminded every, like, that that was the time I took a shit, you know? Like, for, for-

Joe Rogan 51:43 (laughs)

Billy Corben 51:43 ... the whole world to see. And I hung it over ... It stayed there for a number of years. It's not there anymore, but, like, I just, I just, I wanted to remind myself of it, you know?

Joe Rogan 51:52 Well, you're a smart guy. You take motivation in failures. I mean, that's what failures are really good for. When you fail at something, there's, there is a benefit to that in that you, you go, "God, that sucked. I don't ever wanna suck again."

Billy Corben 52:05 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 52:05 Like, "Let me figure out a way to not suck."

Billy Corben 52:06 Exactly. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 52:07 Look, I always say that with about comics. Like, when, when we bomb, that is, it's a terrible feeling, but it's the best opportunity for growth. Because you realize like, "Hey, I, I obviously didn't do a good job. I need to figure out what the fuck I did wrong and batten down the hatches and get this ship right, 'cause I can't experience that again."

Billy Corben 52:25 I became a comedy fan in no small part 'cause I have been to shows where I've seen some of the biggest, funniest guys bomb. And I'm like, "Jesus, short of being a soldier or a cop or, like, a stuntman, this is one of the most dangerous (laughs) , self-destructive-

Joe Rogan 52:44 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 52:45 ... jobs. Like, it's, it requires such bravery and such, uh, str- uh, strength of soul and thickness of skin that, like, I went to fucking Vegas. This is, like, 2000, um, and saw Carlin.

Joe Rogan 53:00 Oh, wow.

Billy Corben 53:00 Big, beautiful room. Sat ph- like, front row. It was weird 'cause, like, the stage was like a wall. Like, I was sitting against, like, the fucking stage. And I had to look up and, like, Carlin's shoe would, like, pass, like, right in front of my eyeball.

Joe Rogan 53:12 Wow.

Billy Corben 53:12 Like, just above my, my eye line. And he was doing material for one of his last specials, and it was the one ... I think it might, might have been the second-to-last. He had that whole bit about, like, he doesn't believe in God, but, like, he believes in, like, shit that he can see and he's afraid of, like the sun or Joe Pesci.

Joe Rogan 53:28 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 53:28 Like, you know, i- uh, that whole bit. And he was in this big old God-fearing crowd there in La- in, in Las Vegas, and they, they were not about this. They were not about it.

Joe Rogan 53:37 Wow.

Billy Corben 53:37 Not one i-oter, not one little bit. And he's trucking back and forth doing it. Fucking crickets. Fucking crickets. Packed house, sold out. I'm the only one laughing in the room. Just me in this giant room.

Joe Rogan 53:53 (laughs)

Billy Corben 53:53 And I'm laughing, uh, my ass off.

Joe Rogan 53:55 (laughs)

Billy Corben 53:55 And I'm all by myself. And I'm, I, at some point, I turned. I, I, I stopped laughing long enough or took a breath to take a drink, right?And I look down and then I look back up at the stage and Carlin is right there. He's like hunched over with his head, like, dangling off the stage, like, practi- And I look up and I'm practically nose to nose with Carlin and he goes, "Thank you, sir." And just-

Joe Rogan 54:18 (laughs)

Billy Corben 54:18 ... (laughs) and just walks away.

Joe Rogan 54:20 (laughs)

Billy Corben 54:20 And keeps stalking the set, the stage.

Joe Rogan 54:22 Oh.

Billy Corben 54:22 And I was like, "Oh my God." And I saw, I was at the improv, um, uh, in Miami, when they, when they had the one at the, remember the, the Hard Rock?

Joe Rogan 54:32 Oh, yeah.

Billy Corben 54:33 The Hard Rock. Uh, I guess they're redoing it or whatever, or-

Joe Rogan 54:35 That fucking place is death. (laughs)

Billy Corben 54:37 It's (laughs) it's just ... It's... I was like, I was like, "Man." Uh, you know they say ... What do they say?

Joe Rogan 54:41 The Hard Rock's the Flo- The- That's the Hollywood one, though.

Billy Corben 54:44 Yeah, Hollywood. The Hollywood Seminole.

Joe Rogan 54:45 That one's actually pretty good.

Billy Corben 54:46 Oh, yeah. It was, but-

Joe Rogan 54:47 That one's good.

Billy Corben 54:47 They've-

Joe Rogan 54:47 The bad one was Miami. The Mi- Miami-

Billy Corben 54:50 Oh, in the Grove.

Joe Rogan 54:50 ... Coconut Grove.

Billy Corben 54:51 That was ... That was rough.

Joe Rogan 54:52 Yeah. That was death.

Billy Corben 54:52 Yeah. But, but the, but th- No, it was cool, but then now it's go- Like, they've bulldozed-

Joe Rogan 54:57 It's gone.

Billy Corben 54:57 ... the whole fucking place. They're supposed to be remodeling and rebuilding at the Seminole Hard Rock. Like, (laughs) it's like, I always s- You know. What's the saying? That like, um, uh, in a casino, the house always wins. I'm like, these Indian casinos are the only place where, like, the house never wins 'cause it doesn't matter how much money you lose there, we still, like, raped their women and stole their country. So, like, the least you could do is, like, drop a little coin at the Indian casino. And that's what I would do. I'd go play. They ... That was the only place ... That is the only place they have blackjack, uh, in South Florida. So, you can go there and play blackjack. But they bulldozed the improv. And I was there one night, Gilbert Gottfried was there. And I was literally the only person laughing.

Joe Rogan 55:34 Oof.

Billy Corben 55:34 But, like, in pain. Like, I was in pain laughing. And it was just brutal. And, like-

Joe Rogan 55:40 Ugh.

Billy Corben 55:40 And I've been in these rooms where, like, these gu- And, and I was just like, "These are the funniest people that I know." And it, it's happened time and time again. And I've been in sh- shows where they killed and I've been to shows where they died. And I was like, "This is amazing. This is so amazing." And it's like the f- If y- The fact that anybody gets back on stage after that, after a night like that, is just a s- Uh, it's remarkable to me. I have nothing ... I've ... The ... Such respect (laughs) for that.

Joe Rogan 56:07 (laughs) I always say that bombing is like sucking 1,000 dicks in front of your mother.

Billy Corben 56:10 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 56:10 But not really, because somewhere out there, there's a guy who loves sucking a dick in front of his mother.

Billy Corben 56:16 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 56:16 And if you put another 999, he wouldn't be that sad. (laughs)

Billy Corben 56:21 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 56:22 But no one wants a bomb in front of their mother. No one wants a bomb, period. It's just terrible.

Billy Corben 56:27 (sighs)

Joe Rogan 56:27 It's a ruthless experience. It's, um, it's, it just, uh, rips you down and, and shreds all your self-worth. Makes you feel terrible. But again, some of my best growth periods in my career have come after eating shit. Uh, m-

Billy Corben 56:44 It just, you spike. You hit that-

Joe Rogan 56:45 Yeah. You realize, like, "Okay, now I gotta-"

Billy Corben 56:46 ... rock bottom and then-

Joe Rogan 56:47 You go to g- Gotta go to work. You can't be complacent. And that's one of the things that f- uh, fuels and motivates me to this day. I'm terrified of bombing, so I, I'll just, I k- keep ... Uh, it's a- anything I can use to make me work harder, I use.

Billy Corben 57:00 The six years since I did my shittiest work have been, like, uh, for me, artistically, creatively, uh, the most productive. And, like, I, I, I feel finally, um, after 20 years of making (laughs) documentaries that I, that I might be doing, like, my best work. Like, but it took that fucking long. And it took basically almost six years from totally bombing-

Joe Rogan 57:24 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 57:24 ... you know, to, for me to feel like I, I hit rock bottom and then have spiked, you know, better than, better than before.

Joe Rogan 57:30 You've done some documentaries with some dangerous people in them. You know, obviously Griselda Blanco's probably one of the most dangerous people on Earth while she was alive. Um, and in this, there, you also touch on that. I mean, there's, you're, uh, a lot of these people are fucking sketchy folks, and you're exposing how stupid their activity were.

Billy Corben 57:52 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 57:52 Does that, does that ever creep you out? You ever get nervous? Like, 'cause you're making these documentaries mocking these people and, you know, rightly so, but it's ... Uh, not Cocaine Cowboys wasn't really mocking.

Billy Corben 58:04 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 58:04 It's more exposing. But this one is, like, openly mocking.

Billy Corben 58:07 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 58:07 This one's really good, man. It's really funny. And it comes out March 29th?

Billy Corben 58:10 Yes, sir. Friday.

Joe Rogan 58:11 Yeah.

Billy Corben 58:11 Yeah. And, uh, uh, April 5th on VOD.

Joe Rogan 58:14 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 58:14 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 58:14 Yeah.

Billy Corben 58:14 And ... Well, this one's, this one's tough because this is like a fresh wound for a lot of people.

Joe Rogan 58:19 Comes on Netflix March 29th? Is that what it is?

Billy Corben 58:20 No, VOD.

Joe Rogan 58:20 VOD.

Billy Corben 58:21 No, I'm sorry. Theaters March 29th-

Joe Rogan 58:22 Oh, okay.

Billy Corben 58:23 ... and VOD April 5th. So like, iTunes, Amazon-

Joe Rogan 58:25 Right.

Billy Corben 58:25 ... pay-per-view on your cable box and everything.

Joe Rogan 58:27 What, uh, kind of release are you gonna get in the theaters?

Billy Corben 58:30 Um, starting off with 12 cities on Friday the 29th. And then, I mean-

Joe Rogan 58:34 Is it L.A.?

Billy Corben 58:35 ... you know, knock wood. Oh, yeah. For sure. At the Laemmle, um, Music Hall.

Joe Rogan 58:37 Oh. Great.

Billy Corben 58:38 Three. And, um, and then, uh, where else? I think San Francisco.

Joe Rogan 58:42 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 58:43 Um, Boston, Miami, Orlando. Um. I think there's, like, 12 cities. And then, I guess depending on how well it does, uh, it's being put out by Greenwich Entertainment who just won the Oscar for Free Solo.

Joe Rogan 58:56 Oh, great.

Billy Corben 58:56 For best documentary.

Joe Rogan 58:57 Oh, awesome.

Billy Corben 58:57 Um, so they know what they're doing. And, and, uh, like I said, hopefully people will go see it. And listen, it ... I hope it's a comedy. I think it's a comedy.

Joe Rogan 59:04 It's a comedy.

Billy Corben 59:05 We tried to make it a comedy. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 59:06 I was laughing my ass off.

Billy Corben 59:07 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 59:07 I was doing chin-ups and laughing.

Billy Corben 59:09 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 59:09 I was like, "What the fuck, man?"

Billy Corben 59:11 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 59:11 That fucking guy. The, the, the tanner. What's his name again? The p- Porter.

Billy Corben 59:15 Porter Fisher.

Joe Rogan 59:15 Porter. The, that guy. Like, what? I just imagine if you got one of those guys in your life and he's just stuck in your life. Like, "Shit, how do I get this fucking guy out of my life?" And the fact that he borrowed money from this guy and then didn't pay-

Billy Corben 59:28 Loaned money. Well, loaned money to this guy. Yeah. Porter loaned it to Tony.

Joe Rogan 59:31 Yeah. Oh, that's what I'm saying.

Billy Corben 59:32 Oh, that's what I'm saying. Oh, I'm sorry.

Joe Rogan 59:33 Tony borrowed money from-

Billy Corben 59:34 Yes, sir.

Joe Rogan 59:34 ... Porter and then didn't pay him, and that's what caused this whole thing. It is ... Alex Rodriguez has gotta be pulling his fucking hair out going, "What in the fuck?"

Billy Corben 59:42 And, and Alex was paying everybody. So was MLB. I mean, everyone was running amok in Miami-

Joe Rogan 59:47 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 59:47 ... like, just b- hiring private investigators, running people down. Alex Rodriguez actually ... This isn't in the documentary, but, um, when these convicted felons stole the stolen (laughs) documents from Porter Fisher, who had stolen the documents from Tony Bosh, they set him up in this whole-... it's so-

Joe Rogan 1:00:08 Ugh.

Billy Corben 1:00:08 It's so absurd. It's a fucking tanning salon heist-

Joe Rogan 1:00:11 Yeah.

Billy Corben 1:00:11 ... where they're like, "Hey, why don't you go in and try this new spray tan color?"

Joe Rogan 1:00:15 (laughs)

Billy Corben 1:00:15 "It's Trumpian Orange."

Joe Rogan 1:00:16 (laughs)

Billy Corben 1:00:17 "Go s- go try it on." And while he's in the fucking spray tan machine-

Joe Rogan 1:00:21 Ugh.

Billy Corben 1:00:21 ... they w- open his car and steal these documents, which ha- have these client lists of all these famous-

Joe Rogan 1:00:26 Yeah.

Billy Corben 1:00:27 ... baseball players, including the highest paid baseball player in the world, A-Rod. And so, they steal it and then they turn around and sell these stolen documents to Major League Baseball for cash. So MLB has this ragtag band of misfits, these, this internal FBI, like their own internal investigations division that they created after the BALCO, uh, steroid scandal. They're running amok. They are seducing nurses, former nurses from Tony Bosch's clinics. They are literally in diners with convicted felons, handing over bags of cash from some MLB slush fund. I don't imagine they were gonna 1099 the guy. And I don't know where this cash came from, 125 grand. And what they did was is that the felon who was doing it had a buddy at a neighboring table at this diner with his cellphone recording, video recording this transaction. And then he turned around and went to A-Rod's camp and said, "I'll sell you a video of me selling known stolen documents." Everybody knew these documents were stolen. So MLB is buying these stolen records, stolen evidence in the State of Florida Department of Health investigation, for cash from a felon. At some point, he gets like freaked out and nervous and he deletes this video off the hard drive. He winds up selling A-Rod a blank hard drive for six figures, okay? And A-Rod sends this hard drive, A-Rod's people send this hard drive around the world to like data recovery services-

Joe Rogan 1:02:01 Oh, geez.

Billy Corben 1:02:01 ... to try to get this video back. So n- unfortunately, the felon didn't get his second six-figure payment because that was s- that was, the first six figures were against-

Joe Rogan 1:02:10 Right.

Billy Corben 1:02:10 ... the recovery of the da- but he got like two, 300 grand-

Joe Rogan 1:02:13 Oh.

Billy Corben 1:02:13 ... to sell A-Rod a blank-

Joe Rogan 1:02:15 Oh.

Billy Corben 1:02:15 ... hard drive.

Joe Rogan 1:02:16 (laughs)

Billy Corben 1:02:16 And A-Rod's dropping money on private investigators who are like having car chases through South Miami, um, it was just totally crazy. And, and (laughs) it's like, I always say like, you come down to the swamp and roll around, you're gonna get some mud on you.

Joe Rogan 1:02:30 Mm.

Billy Corben 1:02:30 So when MLB came down to, to Miami, one of the guy, Jerome Hill, the, the former Baltimore cop turned, uh, Florida Department of Health investigator, he, he says unequivocally that Major League Baseball's investigators broke the law in the State of Florida and should have been prosecuted for it and held accountable for it and never-

Joe Rogan 1:02:50 (exhales)

Billy Corben 1:02:50 ... and never were. I mean, it's good to be a multi-billion dollar monopoly, yes.

Joe Rogan 1:02:54 Well, how old was A-Rod when the scandal broke?

Billy Corben 1:02:57 A-Rod was definitely towards the end of his career.

Joe Rogan 1:02:59 Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Billy Corben 1:02:59 And so that's the interesting thing about... 'Cause like let's be real, I don't give a shit about steroids in baseball. And this era of steroids in baseball was not the same as the other, you know, the Barry Bonds-

Joe Rogan 1:03:10 Right.

Billy Corben 1:03:10 ... you know, kind of era of steroids in baseball. Um, these were not guys, you know, with necks the size of my waist or anything like that.

Joe Rogan 1:03:16 They were microdosing.

Billy Corben 1:03:17 They were microdosing and it was HGH and testosterone. And a lot of these guys, I mean, listen, their, their, their livelihoods are contingent upon-

Joe Rogan 1:03:27 Yes.

Billy Corben 1:03:27 ... their physical performance.

Joe Rogan 1:03:28 Yes.

Billy Corben 1:03:29 And so you gotta play like, what is it? 162 games in 180 days. It's the most physically grueling schedule of any of the, uh, of the professional sports. And guys have always been looking for an edge. In the 1950s, the Yankees were going out to Copacabana all fucking night.

Joe Rogan 1:03:44 Apparently-

Billy Corben 1:03:44 Okay.

Joe Rogan 1:03:44 ... there's an Adderall issue with baseball as well.

Billy Corben 1:03:46 Absolutely.

Joe Rogan 1:03:47 Yeah.

Billy Corben 1:03:47 A disproportionate number of baseball players compared to the general population are on Adderall.

Joe Rogan 1:03:51 Yeah.

Billy Corben 1:03:51 That's a perfo- that's why I said it's a performance-

Joe Rogan 1:03:53 Of course.

Billy Corben 1:03:53 ... enhancing drug. But you had guys like M- Mickey Mantle and Whitey Ford and Billy Martin partying all night at the Copacabana. They have to make a 1:00 PM game, maybe even a doubleheader. They're doing greenies, they're doing amphetamines.

Joe Rogan 1:04:04 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 1:04:04 It's always been a part of, of, of baseball is finding that edge.

Joe Rogan 1:04:07 Right.

Billy Corben 1:04:07 Now, you got guys who are just looking to maybe recover a little faster-

Joe Rogan 1:04:12 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 1:04:12 ... you know, who are from, from injuries or fatigue. You're looking for guys who, um, are, are, are looking to maintain peak performance for a l- a longer period than, than their bodies might have otherwise allowed. Um, is it that big of a deal? I don't know.

Joe Rogan 1:04:28 It's not. And it's, it's, it's a weird deal. It's a weird thing that we have an issue with. Like y- you've... Look, if they did the same sort of stringent testing with NFL players, you'd find out that everyone's on steroids.

Billy Corben 1:04:40 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 1:04:40 That's just a fact. You don't get people that big. And they do catch them every now and then. But I feel like it's like one of those things where like, you know how the drug tar- cartels, they'll let some drug, drug shipments get busted so that the other ones will get through? I almost feel like that's what they do with, with NFL players who get caught. Like, "Oh, look we c- wha- we're, we're testing. We caught somebody."

Billy Corben 1:05:00 Dude, that's what, that's what this was with A-Rod. You know, Bud Selig-

Joe Rogan 1:05:03 Mm.

Billy Corben 1:05:03 ... is the steroid commissioner full stop. That's the bottom line. His tenure was marked by the famous, you know-

Joe Rogan 1:05:10 Barry Bonds.

Billy Corben 1:05:11 ... home run derby. Yeah.

Joe Rogan 1:05:12 Or, yeah, well, uh, Mark McGwire-

Billy Corben 1:05:14 Mark McGwire.

Joe Rogan 1:05:14 ... and Sammy Sosa.

Billy Corben 1:05:14 Absolutely. So-

Joe Rogan 1:05:16 Yeah.

Billy Corben 1:05:18 ... he knowingly, I believe, um, exploited and profited from that era of baseball that really saved them after '94 players strike. I mean, baseball said-

Joe Rogan 1:05:26 Well, because look at the size of those guys.

Billy Corben 1:05:28 (laughs) Where they started.

Joe Rogan 1:05:29 Like... Yeah.

Billy Corben 1:05:30 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 1:05:30 Yeah. I mean, w- so many of them. They just, they got so big.

Billy Corben 1:05:33 We literally morphed them in the documentary. We morphed them from like a before and after.

Joe Rogan 1:05:37 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 1:05:37 Because they're... It was i- they turn into fucking baseball monsters-

Joe Rogan 1:05:41 Yeah.

Billy Corben 1:05:41 ... smacking balls to Guantanamo for Christ's sake.

Joe Rogan 1:05:43 You know what's interesting to me is that some people recovered from that stuff and some people did not. Jose Canseco never recovered. He never recovered in the public eye.

Billy Corben 1:05:53 Does a- and that's why he's so pissed. Like that's why-

Joe Rogan 1:05:55 Yeah.

Billy Corben 1:05:55 ... the... And it, it's fucked up. When you- when you're the pioneer in something-

Joe Rogan 1:05:58 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 1:05:58 ... people really... And dude, they, they had a street named after him in, in Miami-

Joe Rogan 1:06:02 Yeah.

Billy Corben 1:06:02 ... and they quietly took that shit down in the middle of the night after decades of naming that street from... He was just totally humiliated and, and-

Joe Rogan 1:06:08 I think it's also because he ratted out a lot of guys, I think.

Billy Corben 1:06:11 But so did A-Rod.

Joe Rogan 1:06:12 Yeah.

Billy Corben 1:06:12 A-Rod leaked names-

Joe Rogan 1:06:14 Mm-hmm.

Billy Corben 1:06:14 ... to try to distract or defuse detection.

Joe Rogan 1:06:16 But he did put out a book.

Billy Corben 1:06:18 Yeah, but like-

Joe Rogan 1:06:18 It's the public nature of Canseco's book.

Billy Corben 1:06:21 Hmm.

Joe Rogan 1:06:22 It's like, uh, I don't know. I'm just guessing.

Billy Corben 1:06:24 But his- his book was like-

Joe Rogan 1:06:25 (coughs)

Billy Corben 1:06:25 His book turned out to be like, the-

Joe Rogan 1:06:28 (laughs)

Billy Corben 1:06:28 Jose Canseco's book about steroids turned out to be like, the Steele dossier of baseball. It's like, everybody thinks it's pissed and thinks it's a bunch of bullshit, and then over time it's slowly proven true.

Joe Rogan 1:06:37 Right.

Billy Corben 1:06:37 And at the end, there's a pee tape.

Joe Rogan 1:06:38 Yes.

Billy Corben 1:06:39 I think that metaphor holds.

Joe Rogan 1:06:40 Yes. Yeah. Well, that's, that is a good way of looking at it too, right? Because like, think about the outrage when Clinton got his dick sucked by Monica Lewinsky and compare it to Donald Trump having at least two women that we know about where he paid off, that he fucked, and people are like, "Eh."

Billy Corben 1:06:54 Ask the evangelicals where they stand on it.

Joe Rogan 1:06:56 Eh.

Billy Corben 1:06:57 On all that. Eh. Yeah.

Joe Rogan 1:06:58 The man, it was before the man found Christ.

Billy Corben 1:07:00 (laughs) Right.

Joe Rogan 1:07:01 That's what a lot of them say.

Billy Corben 1:07:02 When did he find Christ?

Joe Rogan 1:07:03 Dude, I was watching a documentary where there was a guy who was, uh, some, some Christian guy who was saying, "This, all of these accusations are before he was born, because he was born in the eyes of Christ when he accepted Christ into his life."

Billy Corben 1:07:18 When?

Joe Rogan 1:07:19 Well, I guess when he was running for president. Decided to-

Billy Corben 1:07:21 But that's when he paid off Stormy.

Joe Rogan 1:07:23 Yeah, but-

Billy Corben 1:07:23 Like, the night before the-

Joe Rogan 1:07:24 Yeah, but after that. Then he became Jesus.

Billy Corben 1:07:27 After the ... So after he like-

Joe Rogan 1:07:28 After that.

Billy Corben 1:07:28 Oh.

Joe Rogan 1:07:29 Well, yeah. He paid off Stormy like when? When did he pay her off?

Billy Corben 1:07:31 Like the day before the election.

Joe Rogan 1:07:32 Huh.

Billy Corben 1:07:34 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 1:07:34 I feel bad for her too, because I feel like she thought like this, she's gonna go all in on this and then she lost the court case against him, so she owes his legal fees.

Billy Corben 1:07:42 300 grand.

Joe Rogan 1:07:43 It was just crazy. Like, where the fuck is she gonna get that? And now she's trying to do standup. Yeah, I mean, she gotta s- (stutters) that's a lot. A lot of hand jobs. Um. She's, you know, now she's trying to-

Billy Corben 1:07:54 But enough about Robert Kraft.

Joe Rogan 1:07:54 She was trying to do standup, I think, but-

Billy Corben 1:07:56 No, she's not.

Joe Rogan 1:07:56 Yes, she is, in Houston, Texas. They were calling her the Queen of Clapback. I, that is the-

Billy Corben 1:08:02 The Queen of the Clap?

Joe Rogan 1:08:03 No, no, no. Clapback.

Billy Corben 1:08:04 Oh, okay.

Joe Rogan 1:08:05 You know, like clapback, like she's-

Billy Corben 1:08:06 Yeah, but how-

Joe Rogan 1:08:07 If you say something bad about her, she's gonna come after you even worse. Like there's-

Billy Corben 1:08:10 Really?

Joe Rogan 1:08:10 That clapback expression, like someone, Kim Kardashian claps back at the critics, like, like that is the dumbest ... I cannot wait for that one to fucking dry up and go away. Not Kim Kardashian, that, that expression.

Billy Corben 1:08:23 Like Twitter insult comic kind of shtick, but how do you-

Joe Rogan 1:08:25 Well, it's just clapback, they're calling it when someone has something to say about someone saying something about them. That's clapping back.

Billy Corben 1:08:31 Right, but how does that translate to Stormy Daniels doing standup? How can you do standup out of clapbacks?

Joe Rogan 1:08:35 I don't know. Well, they were calling her the Queen of Clapback, that she's gonna do standup again. I mean, who knows? Maybe she's hilarious.

Billy Corben 1:08:42 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 1:08:42 Maybe she's gonna take it seriously. I mean, you never fucking know. I mean, as a comic, I, I, I leave the door open for all possibilities. But, I mean, it just means to me that she got this situation where she thought, she probably was told by everybody, "Look, hey, you're gonna win this. He's gonna pay you off. You're gonna ... Everyone's gonna know that you told the truth and people are gonna pay for your interviews." And