Joe Rogan Experience #1334 - Fahim Anwar

Fahim Anwar is an actor and stand up comedian. Check out his special on Amazon called "Fahim Anwar: There's No Business Like Show Business". **Recording Note: The recording/encoding of this file was corrupted and slight sync/speed issues exist. (Audio Fixed - Reupload)**

Joe RoganhostFahim AnwarguestJamie Vernonguest

Aug 14, 20192h 43mWatch on YouTube ↗

EVERY SPOKEN WORD

150 min read · 30,017 words

0:00 – 0:45
Running into comics outside the Comedy Store (and forgetting names)
1. JRJoe Rogan
  (instrumental music plays) What's up, bro?
2. FAFahim Anwar
  What's up, man? How are you?
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Good.
4. FAFahim Anwar
  Good to see you, outside the store.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  I know.
6. FAFahim Anwar
  Isn't it weird when you run into a comedian that you don't normally hang out with outside the store? Like, "Oh." I mean, I would recognize you, but sometimes you'll meet someone that you met at a meeting, and then it's like at a Ralph's.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  Ooh.
8. FAFahim Anwar
  And you can't place the context.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  That's bad, especially if it's like an executive and they really like you to remember them.
10. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah. Are you good at faking it?
11. JRJoe Rogan
  Nope.
12. FAFahim Anwar
  (laughs)
13. JRJoe Rogan
  Terrible.
14. FAFahim Anwar
  What's your tell?
15. JRJoe Rogan
  I just say, " I don't know. I'm sorry."
16. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm-hmm.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  I say, "I'm sorry."
18. FAFahim Anwar
  Do you do this thing where you go, "It's good seeing you," instead of-
19. JRJoe Rogan
  Nope.
20. FAFahim Anwar
  ... "Nice meeting you"?
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Nope. I've done, "Nice meeting you," and they've go... We've met five times.
22. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm-hmm.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  And I go, "Oh, shit."
24. FAFahim Anwar
  I don't think people understand the volume of people that comedians, especially at your level, like, come across every day.
25. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
26. FAFahim Anwar
  Like, how many shows we do. People coming, coming up to you afterwards and being like, "Oh, great set. Blah, blah, blah." And how many meetings in general.
0:45 – 1:51
Dunbar’s number and why comedians can’t remember everyone
1. JRJoe Rogan
  Are you aware of, uh, Dunbar's number?
2. FAFahim Anwar
  Oh, is that like how many number of people you-
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
4. FAFahim Anwar
  It's like 100 or something you can keep in your head?
5. JRJoe Rogan
  So they think it's some... Well, I don't think it's an exact science, but I think they think it's somewhere around 150.
6. FAFahim Anwar
  I believe it.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  You got about 150 people in your head.
8. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm-hmm.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  And after that, you're fucked.
10. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
12. FAFahim Anwar
  It's tough.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  It makes sense, right?
14. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  There's no way you can keep them all in there.
16. FAFahim Anwar
  No.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  That doesn't make any sense. Yeah.
18. FAFahim Anwar
  I mean, it's cool outside of the store, you know, having a chat.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes.
20. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  It's like it... You, you feel the most comradery with other comedians outside the store when you run into them at an airport.
22. FAFahim Anwar
  I was just thinking-
23. JRJoe Rogan
  Like, ah.
24. FAFahim Anwar
  ... about that. Every time I go to LAX, I'll bump into, like, someone. Jo Koy, or last time it was Bert Kreischer-
25. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
26. FAFahim Anwar
  And like Jesus Trejo were going to do, I think Utah. It's just like a hub for all of us.
27. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes.
28. FAFahim Anwar
  So-
29. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
30. FAFahim Anwar
  You'll see so many 'cause we're all just transients.
1:51 – 2:35
Stand-up as an art you can’t practice alone
1. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. It's the... One of the weird art forms that you can't pra-... You can't practice alone. You have to use an audience.
2. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Don't you think?
4. FAFahim Anwar
  Oh, for sure.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
6. FAFahim Anwar
  And even like I'll be telling the same joke, and I won't really change the words, but it'll be like an inflection. It's almost like... I don't know, when a jazz musician or something, like, plays a note just a little differently.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
8. FAFahim Anwar
  You know, you ever notice that? Like a joke won't work, maybe because I'm, I'm like making a meal out of this word.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm.
10. FAFahim Anwar
  But if I kind of just, like, throw it away-
11. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
12. FAFahim Anwar
  ... it... Oh, now that fixes it. It's interesting to do it long enough where you realize it's like... It's not the words sometimes. You... There's like a performance nuance to it to fix-
13. JRJoe Rogan
  Right.
14. FAFahim Anwar
  ... the joke.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
16. FAFahim Anwar
  Like it's... On paper, it's the same joke.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  You know what's really weird, is that none of this shit is written anywhere.
18. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm-hmm.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  Like what we're talking about.
2:35 – 4:18
Being asked to write your act: transcripts, bureaucracy, and dodging requests
1. FAFahim Anwar
  You know what the worst is? Like, I did, um... Like JFL, they're doing a taping out there for TV, and they're like, "Send us your transcript."
2. JRJoe Rogan
  Ugh.
3. FAFahim Anwar
  So you... That means you have to sit at a computer and, like, it takes-
4. JRJoe Rogan
  Write out your act?
5. FAFahim Anwar
  It takes the magic... Like, whatever your seven minutes you wanna do for the taping, they want you to sit on, like, on a Mac and open up Word and be like, "How you guys doing?" (laughs) Or whatever, just like type it all out.
6. JRJoe Rogan
  You need a better manager.
7. FAFahim Anwar
  No, but the thing... Like, I refu-... I didn't do it.
8. JRJoe Rogan
  Good for you.
9. FAFahim Anwar
  I just dodged it.
10. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes.
11. FAFahim Anwar
  I asked Alia, 'cause I used to do it in the past, and I was like, "Yo, they're asking me to write this out. It's taking all the fun and organic." Like, I feel it would really hurt my performance-
12. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
13. FAFahim Anwar
  ... if I literally wrote a transcript and I'm like a robot up there. And he was like, "Just don't do it." And I go, "What happens?" He's like, "Nothing. Nothing happens." (laughs)
14. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs) Well, it's-
15. FAFahim Anwar
  (laughs) He's like, he's like, "I've done it a million times." And said, "Just keep... Just be dodgy."
16. JRJoe Rogan
  It's some pencil pusher. That doesn't make any sense.
17. FAFahim Anwar
  I think they get, you know-
18. JRJoe Rogan
  Well, they have power over people that don't have a name yet.
19. FAFahim Anwar
  I think they have people above them-
20. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
21. FAFahim Anwar
  ... breathing down their neck, and then, you know, shit rolls downhill, so then they keep on asking like, "Where is it? Where is it?"
22. JRJoe Rogan
  Just change your number.
23. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah, yeah. Well, that's why I had, like, the reps kinda be a buffer-
24. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes.
25. FAFahim Anwar
  And I was just very aloof and like, "He's very busy." Blah, blah, blah.
26. JRJoe Rogan
  Do they contact you at all? Was it direct to you?
27. FAFahim Anwar
  The thing is I would, I would see them throughout the fest.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh.
29. FAFahim Anwar
  And they're lovely people. I love these people, but like-
30. JRJoe Rogan
  And they would say, "Where's the transcript?"
4:18 – 7:41
Just For Laughs then vs. now: the deal-making gold rush and its downsides
1. JRJoe Rogan
  Well, it's also like Just For Laughs is a weird situation. It's-
2. FAFahim Anwar
  It's evolved, right?
3. JRJoe Rogan
  It used... Well, yes. It's a weird way of looking at it. It used to be very valuable for comedians.
4. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  Now, it's very valuable for Just For Laughs.
6. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm-hmm.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  Because they have this enormous platform, and you go there and everybody knows that all these great comedians are gonna be there, and they make an enormous amount of money off the comedians. It used to be the comedians would go there because the in-... Because the industry would go there, and the whole key to the whole thing was development deals for sitcoms. And they tossed out so much money.
8. FAFahim Anwar
  I always hear about the gold rush-
9. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh.
10. FAFahim Anwar
  ... and the heyday of JFL.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes.
12. FAFahim Anwar
  And how deals were getting thrown out left and right.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm.
14. FAFahim Anwar
  And like lives were made.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, lives were made.
16. FAFahim Anwar
  I don't know that JFL.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  But fake lives were made too. Like, they, they ruined it, like, 'cause... (sighs) I have a theory about people who aren't comedians. Like, they thi-... They see people laughing at stuff, and they see something's fun. They think it's funny. But a comedian can go, "This is just tricks."
18. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
20. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah. Well, 'cause, uh, the amount... The volume of comedy th- that we watch on a regular basis-
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
22. FAFahim Anwar
  ... is so much.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
24. FAFahim Anwar
  So we can discern. Like, Ian Edwards and I will talk about this all the time. We watch... We're students of comedy. We watch a lot of comedy. People can get like a huge pop out of the room, but, like, Ian can cut through the bullshit-
25. JRJoe Rogan
  Right.
26. FAFahim Anwar
  ... and know that like, "Oh, that's a parlor trick." Or...
27. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
28. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
29. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
30. FAFahim Anwar
  So it's a different type of thing. But I think a lot of times, you know, suits and everything, they just hear decibels-
7:41 – 10:36
The ‘Chicken’ cautionary tale and the pressure to act (sitcom pipeline)
1. JRJoe Rogan
  Well, some people are just not... They're great comics, but they're not really into acting. They're not the best at acting and they get kind of forced into acting.
2. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah. I love Mitch Hedberg's joke where he's like-
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
4. FAFahim Anwar
  He's a great standup, you know? And it's like, you know, they'll come up to me and they'll be like, "Can you act?" It's like, that's like going up to a chef and being like, "Can you farm?" (laughs)
5. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. (laughs) It's true.
6. FAFahim Anwar
  I mean, I'm butchering it, but yeah-
7. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, but, uh-
8. FAFahim Anwar
  ... they're such different things.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. But it's a, uh, ev- You have an agent, right? And the agent wants to make money, so it's, it's an avenue for cash.
10. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  And, you know, you look at Seinfeld and Tim Allen and Roseanne and Brett Butler, and there was all these comedians in the '90s that made a ass load of money-
12. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  ... doing sitcoms.
14. FAFahim Anwar
  Well, that's the quicker payoff too. I, I even noticed it with my own career, like when I was a younger comedian out here in my, like, early 20s when I moved from Seattle, like, when I first got reps and stuff. I was going out on these auditions for, like, CW shows or-
15. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
16. FAFahim Anwar
  ... just whatever. They just throw you against the wall.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, right.
18. FAFahim Anwar
  You're an actor. Comedy is this thing you do at night.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  Right. They don't give a fuck if you-
20. FAFahim Anwar
  They don't really give a shit that you do standup.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
22. FAFahim Anwar
  They probably don't even think you're funny.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
24. FAFahim Anwar
  (laughs) You know?
25. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
26. FAFahim Anwar
  It's just a cute thing you do. It's like a-
27. JRJoe Rogan
  Right.
28. FAFahim Anwar
  ... kid, like a dance recital or something. Like, they don't care as long as you're going to these auditions in the daytime. So, they just hope that you hit on what, like a series regular.
29. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
30. FAFahim Anwar
  And then that's some cash flow for the biz.
10:36 – 12:45
Specials every two years, purging old bits, and the grind of staying sharp
1. JRJoe Rogan
  And the good thing is, uh, nowadays, the cycle of, uh, comedy, we all do a special basically every two years.
2. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm-hmm.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Pretty much all of us. Burr, Kreischer, Segura, Ari kind of everybody kinda does a special or tries to do a special somewhere around every two years.
4. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm-hmm.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  So, every two years, you throw it all out and you're a beginner again.
6. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  You have no fucking acts. (laughs)
8. FAFahim Anwar
  (laughs)
9. JRJoe Rogan
  You're terrified. You have to come up with new premises and scramble, and that requires a lot of performing.
10. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah. I like how Burr-
11. JRJoe Rogan
  Just going around-
12. FAFahim Anwar
  ... was on here talking about... It was cool to hear a guy like him even talk about just the dilution of specials where he's like, "They're not special anymore."
13. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
14. FAFahim Anwar
  It's just like a flyer or like a brochure-
15. JRJoe Rogan
  It's a weird name, right?
16. FAFahim Anwar
  ... a brochure that I'm still around.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes.
18. FAFahim Anwar
  That's all it is.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  Little bit, yeah.
20. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah. I mean, the, obviously there's different degrees of polish with some of the specials and how great some of them are. But there's so many now.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  It's a weird name.
22. FAFahim Anwar
  Special.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
24. FAFahim Anwar
  Well, it's just leftover from yesteryear. It's like, why are albums a certain length?
25. JRJoe Rogan
  But-
26. FAFahim Anwar
  'Cause of the...
27. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, but at least an album is, like, a collection of music that is all in one thing that you get that's kind of been consistent forever. A special, it's like, what is it anymore?
28. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm-hmm.
29. JRJoe Rogan
  What is it?
30. FAFahim Anwar
  I guess 45 minutes to an hour of jokes strung together.
12:45 – 15:25
Not smoking weed at the Store: CBD, cooking oils, and Joe’s voices
1. JRJoe Rogan
  So, you are one of the rare comedians that doesn't smoke pot.
2. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah. I guess so.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  We talked about that.
4. FAFahim Anwar
  And it's kind of interesting, especially being in this industry, not taking advantage of that because it's (laughs) all-
5. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
6. FAFahim Anwar
  Especially at the store. Like, you'll do a show, and they're like, "Hey, do you want these three bags, these three pillowcases of weed-"
7. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
8. FAFahim Anwar
  "... and CBD oil?" And you're like, "Nah."
9. JRJoe Rogan
  You don't take the CBD oil either?
10. FAFahim Anwar
  I haven't done, like... Is it good? What should I-
11. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, it's great for you.
12. FAFahim Anwar
  What would I use it for?
13. JRJoe Rogan
  It's great for anxiety. It's great for... It rel- reduces inflammation. It's great for, uh... A lot of people use it for, uh, sleep. It's, uh, it's just good for you.
14. FAFahim Anwar
  Hmm.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  It's like it's a he- it's a nutrient, you know? It's like, it's healthy for you.
16. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah. It's hot right now.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  It's very hot.
18. FAFahim Anwar
  Oh.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  Really love this.
20. FAFahim Anwar
  If I was in the biz, I'd be like, "Get CBD on the phone."
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Love CBD.
22. FAFahim Anwar
  (laughs) I love what CBD is doing.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  Love it.
24. FAFahim Anwar
  "BD, how you doing?"
25. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
26. FAFahim Anwar
  "Cannola's out. CBD is in." (laughs)
27. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. Cannola is bullshit. That stuff's bad for you.
28. FAFahim Anwar
  Can you cook with CBD?
29. JRJoe Rogan
  Uh, that's a good question. I bet you can't. I would imagine it has a low flash point, like it would burn quickly.
30. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
15:25 – 17:13
Alex Jones, Epstein, and being mischaracterized in public life
1. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah, 'cause you're Alex Jones and, like, you got it built.
2. JRJoe Rogan
  But I know Alex so well.
3. FAFahim Anwar
  Uh-huh.
4. JRJoe Rogan
  I've known Alex for, like, more than 20 years, so it's like-
5. FAFahim Anwar
  So that's just easy.
6. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. I've d- I've hung out with that guy. We've been hammered together so many times. It's like it's... That is the most misunderstood guy on the planet. He just needs somebody next to him.
7. FAFahim Anwar
  (laughs)
8. JRJoe Rogan
  That's what he... He needs someone to go, "Alex, let's slow down. Like, you, you're m- you were, you had a real good point there, but..." (laughs)
9. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah. Or he's, he's need a manager who's always with him.
10. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. He even agreed with me. We talked about it. I said, "You just need, like, a rational journalist who's next to you to, like, st-..." He goes, "You're right. You're right. You're right. I do need that." And I, I go, "Just, you need someone who just balances it out."
11. FAFahim Anwar
  Even Keith.
12. JRJoe Rogan
  Look, he was right about all this Jeffrey Epstein shit. That is a fucking fact. Alex Jones called this years ago. Years ago. He was saying that they take a lot of famous people to this island, and they have all these young girls that this guy hooks them up with. He was talking about this years ago. Now it is mainstream news.
13. JVJamie Vernon
  And those human hybrid-
14. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes.
15. JVJamie Vernon
  ... experiments going on?
16. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes. Yes.
17. JVJamie Vernon
  (laughs) Which sounds like a complete joke when he said it.
18. JRJoe Rogan
  When he brought it up, we were like, "What?"
19. FAFahim Anwar
  (laughs)
20. JVJamie Vernon
  (laughs)
21. JRJoe Rogan
  We were like, "What?" Now it's fucking mainstream news. This is a fact, man. Like, people want to write that guy off 'cause he'll tell you he's crazy. He'll let you know he's crazy. I mean, I... On my show, there was one of the, one of the famo- the funniest things he ever said. He's like, "Look, I'm going to be honest with you. I'm kind of retarded."
22. FAFahim Anwar
  Oh, yeah. Yeah.
23. JVJamie Vernon
  (laughs)
24. JRJoe Rogan
  And I fell to the ground laughing. But that, but that's who he really is, man. People just have him lumped in, uh, you know. It's like some people, they don't represent the best aspects of themselves right to people, and then other people try to define them. Like, people try to define you.
25. FAFahim Anwar
  Uh-huh.
26. JRJoe Rogan
  It's really... One of the things that, uh, that's really kind of weird about the more famous you get, the more people try to define you in a way that's detrimental or a way that's dismissive and limiting.
27. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
17:13 – 23:54
Bernie on the podcast, Trump’s disruption, and politics as nickname warfare
1. JRJoe Rogan
  Like, I've noticed that after this Bernie Sanders thing that I did. So, any- anybody listening to this, you, if you're, you're saying this, I am not right wing at all, so stop saying that. It's silly. It's foolish. I've interviewed right-wing people. I am 100% leftwing. The only thing that stops me from... The only things that I disagree with about leftwing people is support for the military, support for police, and the Second Amendment. That's probably it. Everything else across the board, I lean way left, in terms of, like... Bernie Sanders made a ton of sense to me, and I would 100% vote for him. Tulsi Gabbard is my favorite.
2. FAFahim Anwar
  Hmm.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  I mean, I'm not, I'm not a rightwing person. So, this nonsense... Like, so many people were saying-
4. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  ... that, you know, that Bernie Sanders spent this time on a rightwing podcast. I'm like, "What? What are you saying?"
6. FAFahim Anwar
  Sure. And don't you think he weighed the pros and cons of... Like, it was an opportunity for him, and I think-
7. JRJoe Rogan
  I think it was-
8. FAFahim Anwar
  ... everyone thought it was a win as well.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  I don't think he had any idea who I was.
10. FAFahim Anwar
  Really?
11. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. I think it was one of his young staff members who's friends with Kyle Kulinski, who is, uh, a really good leftwing progressive talk show guy on YouTube.
12. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm-hmm.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  And Kyle hooked it all up. And, um, this, uh, this idea that...... you know, it's bad for someone to talk to people. It's just, it's foolish.
14. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  There's, there's a weird thing that's going on right now.
16. FAFahim Anwar
  I thought it was a great platform for him to, like, get his ideas out there and to be heard in something other than just sound bites-
17. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes.
18. FAFahim Anwar
  ... that could be taken out of context.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  It's a great platform, I think, for anyone who's running for anything to have a long-form conversation w- and it's good for us, too, because we get to find out who they really are. You really can't hide in a long conversation.
20. FAFahim Anwar
  Oh, yeah. Three hours?
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
22. FAFahim Anwar
  You can't, like, talk and point-
23. JRJoe Rogan
  I only did an hour and 10 with Bernie. That's all he had, 'cause, you know, the guy's running for... He's legit running for pre- Like, he could be president.
24. FAFahim Anwar
  Right.
25. JRJoe Rogan
  He's not like... (sighs) You know, like, there's some people that are running for president that are like, "All right, bro." You know? Like-
26. FAFahim Anwar
  (laughs) Uh-huh.
27. JRJoe Rogan
  Who was that guy? Zoltan... What is his name? He, he was the guy who was running, uh, the transhumanist platform. Istvan... How do you say his last name? Very nice guy. Sorry, I forget his name.
28. FAFahim Anwar
  Is that, is that this? For this coming year?
29. JRJoe Rogan
  No, it was the last one.
30. FAFahim Anwar
  Oh.
23:54 – 31:23
Pop culture whiplash: Aladdin, Sonic, Batman casting, and TV tastes across America
1. JRJoe Rogan
  Did you see the most recent one?
2. FAFahim Anwar
  I did.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  It was pretty good.
4. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  Got bad reviews. I didn't understand it.
6. FAFahim Anwar
  Really?
7. JRJoe Rogan
  People didn't like how-
8. FAFahim Anwar
  I mean, what were they expecting?
9. JRJoe Rogan
  Well, they did- they felt... I, what I read was that Will Smith modernized it too much.
10. FAFahim Anwar
  (laughs) What does that mean?
11. JRJoe Rogan
  I don't know.
12. FAFahim Anwar
  Like, I prefer a classic Genie.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh. They used modern urban vernacular.
14. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  And they just weren't uncomfortable with that.
16. FAFahim Anwar
  You remember how, um...... you know, when the first photos came out of Will Smith as a genie. I love how little it takes to whip this nation into a frenzy. Like, (laughs) I'll wake up and open up Twitter and then the Will Smith genie, everyone is freaking out over that.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
18. FAFahim Anwar
  And it's crazy how, how we put them on the same pedestal. Like, some sorta Trump scandal or, like, Pedophile Island and then the Blue Genie-
19. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes.
20. FAFahim Anwar
  ... or Sonic looks weird.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Right.
22. FAFahim Anwar
  Sonic the Hedgehog looked weird.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  Right, the chainsaw.
24. FAFahim Anwar
  And both, both take on the same amount of fervor online.
25. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, same amount of psychic energy.
26. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
27. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, one of my... I think one of the biggest gaffes, biggest mistakes ever was Ben Affleck thinking he could be Batman. If Ben Affleck never ran for Batman, he would have 50% less hate.
28. FAFahim Anwar
  You think?
29. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes.
30. FAFahim Anwar
  Aren't there some people who liked or no? Was it, uh...
31:23 – 37:17
The ‘Fredo’ incident: Cuomo, red-flag laws, and media spin
1. FAFahim Anwar
  ... it's like the Fredo thing. "No, I thought your name was Fredo."
2. JRJoe Rogan
  Dude, that Fredo thing-
3. FAFahim Anwar
  "Dude, you're not Fredo? Dude, I was talking to my buddy. I thought that you were Fredo."
4. JVJamie Vernon
  (laughs)
5. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm.
6. JRJoe Rogan
  D- did you see that?
7. JVJamie Vernon
  Yeah, why?
8. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah, of course.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  D- did you see it, Jim? That Chris Cuomo guy s- r- Donald Trump had the best line today. Donald Trump won the internet today with this. He said, "Should we red-flag Chris Cuomo 'cause he seemed unhinged, he looked ... He was using terrible language, should not have a gun?" (laughs)
10. FAFahim Anwar
  (laughs)
11. JRJoe Rogan
  He basically exposed those red-flag laws. He goes like, "You see a guy like that, he's irrational. That guy's irrational." He goes, "I'll wreck your shit. I'll throw you down a flight of stairs."
12. FAFahim Anwar
  I like, I liked the stairs comment. That was ... I enjoyed that.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  Like, what is he talking about? 'Cause the guy called you Fredo, and he's saying that Fredo-
14. FAFahim Anwar
  I didn't know-
15. JRJoe Rogan
  ... is the same thing as the N-word?
16. FAFahim Anwar
  I didn't know Fredo was derogatory. Or, maybe I'm new to it. I just ... And not that I would ever try to call someone Fredo. Sometimes, you know?
17. JRJoe Rogan
  It's not!
18. FAFahim Anwar
  I don't know.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  It's a fucking character in a movie. It's like Aladdin.
20. FAFahim Anwar
  Is it like, uh, there's no, like ... I don't know. Nothing-
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Cultural context?
22. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  I'm Italian.
24. FAFahim Anwar
  Oh.
25. JRJoe Rogan
  There's no cultural context for Fredo where people are like, "What the fuck did you say?"
26. JVJamie Vernon
  (laughs)
27. JRJoe Rogan
  That doesn't exist.
28. FAFahim Anwar
  Sure.
29. JRJoe Rogan
  It does not exist.
30. FAFahim Anwar
  Right.
37:17 – 41:07
Airport autograph hustlers and refusing to ‘work for’ resellers
1. JRJoe Rogan
  It's like some people get weir-... You know who gets weird?
2. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm-hmm.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  The fucking autograph people at the airport. They just sell you autographs.
4. FAFahim Anwar
  How do they know, man? How do they, like... Would you be surprised sometimes?
5. JRJoe Rogan
  They just... Somebody tell somebody off.
6. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm-hmm.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  Somebody, somebody pays somebody off or something.
8. FAFahim Anwar
  What do you do? Do you sign or do you just keep walking?
9. JRJoe Rogan
  I tell them, "I'll sign one. I'll sign one." They get mad at me. "I got a stack of these." I go, "No, no, no. I'm not working for you."
10. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  "Not working for you." Like, there's people that charge people that go to those conventions.
12. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm-hmm.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  And they'll sit at a booth, and they'll charge someone X amount of dollars. Like, it's like 20 bucks or more (clears throat) for an autographed photo. I don't do that. I'm not going to do that ever. So I'm not, I'm not... I don't w-... I don't even want you selling my picture. I don't want it to be sold.
14. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  I don't want my autograph to be valuable. But if, if I fel-... If I thought someone-
16. FAFahim Anwar
  But-
17. JRJoe Rogan
  ... was really a fan and they wanted me to sign something, 'cause-
18. FAFahim Anwar
  That's different.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes. I would sign something for them.
20. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah. Yeah.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  I'd be happy to. But that's-
22. FAFahim Anwar
  Instead of, like, a 40-year-old guy with a ponytail and a stack of-
23. JRJoe Rogan
  If you had a stack of fucking photos of me-
24. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm-hmm.
25. JRJoe Rogan
  ... in various... You're selling those.
26. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
27. JRJoe Rogan
  I know you're selling those. So some guy... One guy got mad at me, and he was like following me around LAX. I was like, "Dude, I'm not signing any more." He's like, "Next time I see you, okay?" I'm like, "I'm not signing anymore. I'm going."
28. FAFahim Anwar
  But, you know, by signing one of them, you're making it very valuable. (laughs)
29. JRJoe Rogan
  I don't care.
30. FAFahim Anwar
  If you sign the whole stack-
41:07 – 50:34
Comedy Store community, humility, and the end of ‘bumping’ culture
1. FAFahim Anwar
  Yes and no, 'cause you are a rarity, I think, of the comedians at the store who have gotten to a certain point where you kind of have a relationship with everyone at The Comedy Store, from the door guy to the waitresses to like, you know, stand-ups like me or like Santino or Ian. Like, you know, you have a relationship with everyone. You come through. You spend time at the store. You have... You're being pulled by a lot of things, like UFC and the family and all this stuff, the podcast. But you will hang at the store.
2. JRJoe Rogan
  Well, that's a community. It's very important to me.
3. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm-hmm.
4. JRJoe Rogan
  Tha- that community means... It means a lot. It means a lot. Um, and I like, I like supporting the up-and-coming people. I think it's very important. I think, um, all the door people, the guys who work the lot, those guys are all... They're... We're all gonna work together someday, you know?
5. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
6. JRJoe Rogan
  It's very possible. They'll, they'll be... You know, I'll be at one theater. They'll be at another theater, you know?
7. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm-hmm.
8. JRJoe Rogan
  I'll be at a club over here. They'll be at a club over there. We're all the same.
9. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
10. JRJoe Rogan
  It's just an illusion. It's just time. And I think it comes from martial arts, because in martial arts everybody trains together. You know, I'm a black belt in jujitsu, but I'm as friendly to the white belts as I am to other black belts. We, we shake hands. We hug. If I roll, I'll roll with a guy who's new, just starting out. I'll give him tips. I'll help him out.You know, we're all in it together. And I feel like that's the approach that I take with comedy, the same approach. I don't believe in this elitist shit. I think it's stupid. I think it's- it's bad for everybody.
11. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
12. JRJoe Rogan
  It's bad for the person who becomes elite, even more so than it's bad for the- the up-and-comer. Because the up-and-comers, if you don't, if you dismiss up-and-comers and you treat them like shit, like you treat them like you're better than them, you're above them, you don't need to, like, talk to them, you don't make eye contact with them, you ignore them when they're trying to talk to you... And I've seen that from comics. And, um, I think it's bad for you. It- it... For them, it just makes them angry at you.
13. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm-hmm.
14. JRJoe Rogan
  They can't wait till... And I have been in that position before where someone's dismissed me and been shitty to me, and then I surpassed them fame-wise, and then-
15. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah.
16. JRJoe Rogan
  ... passed by. And then they become friendly and weird with you.
17. FAFahim Anwar
  And you never forget.
18. JRJoe Rogan
  And you kind of remember. Yeah, man. Yes.
19. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah. It's very strange when you see the 180.
20. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes.
21. FAFahim Anwar
  And some... You'll be in comedy long enough to see plenty of 180s.
22. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
23. FAFahim Anwar
  And it's not... I mean, you'll-
24. JRJoe Rogan
  I'll give you some names after the show.
25. FAFahim Anwar
  (laughs) Oh, really?
26. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes.
27. FAFahim Anwar
  Oh, I would love that. Yeah, yeah.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, got some names, some good names, some juicy names.
29. FAFahim Anwar
  And then you- you act however the relationship is now at this point in time.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
50:34 – 1:00:19
Rooms vs. theaters vs. arenas: timing, acoustics, and scaling comedy
1. JRJoe Rogan
  What's the largest crowd you've ever done?
2. FAFahim Anwar
  I've been watching your stories and stuff, and that's fucking insane.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
4. FAFahim Anwar
  Like even when you're in the green room and you just hear these murmurs-
5. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
6. FAFahim Anwar
  ... it sounds like s- l- y- you know, like an angry mob is going to kill you or something. You just hear (mimics crowd) .
7. JRJoe Rogan
  It's crazy.
8. FAFahim Anwar
  But they're all just like filtering into this giant theater. Maybe 3,000 or 4,000.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  3,000? That's big.
10. FAFahim Anwar
  And that was, that was a trip for me.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  That's big. But you notice when you do 3,000 or 4,000 that there's like ... You have to give them more pause.
12. FAFahim Anwar
  Oh, yeah. Yeah.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  More time to- for the set, the, the, the joke, the punchline to settle, the laughs to settle before you move on to another, another word.
14. FAFahim Anwar
  But what's great about doing it so long is standup is this conversation with the audience, so you know to wait.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
16. FAFahim Anwar
  Like you have inherent timing.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes.
18. FAFahim Anwar
  Another comic would just kinda know the timing of the club and just like plow into the next joke-
19. JRJoe Rogan
  (inhales deeply)
20. FAFahim Anwar
  ... while they're still getting laughs from a theater.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, you can't do that at a th- But I took a ... I was talking about this yesterday with Tom Papa, that one of the reasons, uh, uh, one of, one of the best lessons that I ever had was actually sitting in the audience at one of Richard, uh, uh, not Richard, Lewis Black's.
22. FAFahim Anwar
  Uh-huh.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  Not Richard Lewis. I don't know why I confuse the guys.
24. FAFahim Anwar
  I mean, I, I would confuse it, yeah, for sure. Lewis-
25. JRJoe Rogan
  Lew- The word Lewis.
26. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm-hmm.
27. JRJoe Rogan
  A Lewis Black show in New Jersey. He was there the night before me, and Joey Diaz and I sat in the audience. And he would hit a punchline and people would laugh, and then he hi- he would hit the tag and I couldn't hear the tag, 'cause all the other-
28. FAFahim Anwar
  Mm...
29. JRJoe Rogan
  ... people were laughing around us. And I was like, "Oh." Like you gotta be like a little more selective.
30. FAFahim Anwar
  Sit in it.
1:00:19 – 1:06:34
LA logistics and thrill stories: club choices, helicopters, and flying fears
1. FAFahim Anwar
  I know what you mean though. It's like I, I'm in Tarzana now and like someone will be like, "Hey, do you wanna do this show?"... in Irvine, and that's just like saying my show's on Mars. Can you come-
2. JRJoe Rogan
  Irvine at eight o'clock? You might as well leave your house yesterday.
3. FAFahim Anwar
  (laughs)
4. JVJamie Vernon
  Yeah. Like, "Burr, can you chopper me to-" (laughs)
5. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
6. FAFahim Anwar
  ... to- to Irvine?"
7. JRJoe Rogan
  Have you been in a chopper with Burr?
8. FAFahim Anwar
  No.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  You gotta go.
10. FAFahim Anwar
  But when I was working at Boeing, I had a coworker who was learning, uh... No. Well, he- he had his hours up and everything, so he fly- he flew choppers, and during our lunch break, he's like, "Do you wanna go in the chopper?"
11. JRJoe Rogan
  Jesus.
12. FAFahim Anwar
  I was like, "Sure." So then, he's like, "Let's take the doors off."
13. JRJoe Rogan
  What?
14. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah. Took-
15. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, this guy's trying to kill you.
16. FAFahim Anwar
  Took- No, but like, it was fine.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  He didn't like you.
18. FAFahim Anwar
  It was crazy. I figured, when else am I gonna go in a chopper?
19. JRJoe Rogan
  That's true.
20. FAFahim Anwar
  So from my lunch break, I went in a chopper with this guy. I recorded it.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Wow.
22. FAFahim Anwar
  And then his- and then my mom saw it and she just, like, flipped out. She's like, "Fucking-"
23. JRJoe Rogan
  "What are you doing, Fahim?"
24. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
25. JVJamie Vernon
  Yeah, yeah.
26. JRJoe Rogan
  "I love you. Don't die."
27. FAFahim Anwar
  Yeah, yeah. She thought I was gonna die. Yeah. But it was fun.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, if I had a- a son and- and I was a woman and my little boy was in a plane-

Episode duration: 2:43:13

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Running into comics outside the Comedy Store (and forgetting names)

Dunbar’s number and why comedians can’t remember everyone

Stand-up as an art you can’t practice alone

Being asked to write your act: transcripts, bureaucracy, and dodging requests

Just For Laughs then vs. now: the deal-making gold rush and its downsides

The ‘Chicken’ cautionary tale and the pressure to act (sitcom pipeline)

Specials every two years, purging old bits, and the grind of staying sharp

Not smoking weed at the Store: CBD, cooking oils, and Joe’s voices

Alex Jones, Epstein, and being mischaracterized in public life

Bernie on the podcast, Trump’s disruption, and politics as nickname warfare

Pop culture whiplash: Aladdin, Sonic, Batman casting, and TV tastes across America

The ‘Fredo’ incident: Cuomo, red-flag laws, and media spin

Airport autograph hustlers and refusing to ‘work for’ resellers

Comedy Store community, humility, and the end of ‘bumping’ culture

Rooms vs. theaters vs. arenas: timing, acoustics, and scaling comedy

LA logistics and thrill stories: club choices, helicopters, and flying fears

Get more out of YouTube videos.