EVERY SPOKEN WORD
150 min read · 30,028 words- 0:00 – 4:19
Apple ecosystem traps: upgrades, Final Cut vs Premiere, and iMessage lock-in
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs) We good?
- NANarrator
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
Roy Wood-
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yo.
- JRJoe Rogan
... Junior. How are you, sir?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
How you doing, man?
- JRJoe Rogan
Pleasure. A pleasure to have you on here, man. You're one of-
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Man, appreciate it.
- JRJoe Rogan
... the funniest guys alive. Absolutely.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
I don't know about that, man.
- JRJoe Rogan
You are. You're-
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Just trying to pay bills, bro.
- JRJoe Rogan
You're one of the funniest guys out there, man. I'm, uh, very excited to have you in here. Fuck's going... And we were talking shit about Apple and electronics.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Uh-
- JRJoe Rogan
Apple's fucking you, I hear.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
So-
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs)
- NANarrator
(laughs)
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... I got the new MacBook, right? And the new MacBook with the new OS or whatever it is, it doesn't fuck with the old versions of Final Cut. The, the old video editing software I used to use, new MacBook goes, "You gotta buy that shit again." I'm like, "My nigga, I just paid for that shit, hundreds of dollars with my last computer. And now I gotta get ... My ... You're telling me my old software ain't no good with the new..." And you could make the software work with the new OS if you wanted to, but they don't. They get you to buy it again and all that shit.
- JRJoe Rogan
So dirty.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
So now I'm having to learn Adobe Premiere. I was pretty good with Final Cut, but I'm having to relearn-
- JRJoe Rogan
You're swapping out.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah, I gotta relearn-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah. Good for you.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... a whole new thing. And if I'm gonna do that, then I may as well relearn a whole new piece of electronics. But to do that means I have to gut everything.
- JRJoe Rogan
Cool.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
That means you have to gut the Apple TV, you have to let go of the iPhone, you have to let go of the iPads.
- JRJoe Rogan
Ooh.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
My girlfriend ... And like, the, uh, the whole house-
- JRJoe Rogan
The ecosystem.
- 4:19 – 6:45
90s/early internet nostalgia: AOL email, modems, and first computers
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
The irony of all of this is that I still have an AOL email address, as much as I bitch about it.
- JRJoe Rogan
Bzzz. Do you really?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
Wow.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
I do. And, and you know what? It don't ... Like I don't understand email slander.
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs)
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
It's like, motherfucker, it's ... I'm sending you words electronically. Does it matter-
- JRJoe Rogan
It's AOL.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... what company? What is it n- Is my email more ghetto? Does it come with chicken grease stains-
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs)
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... when you open it in your laptop? No. It's the same words that if I sent it from Gmail ... Now I have a Gmail account so that people will take me seriously when I email them about business ideas. But I still have an old school AOL email that I've had since college. And I'm like, "It's fine."
- JRJoe Rogan
It's a one ... It's one of those things, though, when-
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
You just don't let it go. I'm just-
- JRJoe Rogan
When you think about, "You've got mail." You remember when you first heard that? You've got mail.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
And you were happy.
- JRJoe Rogan
No.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
You're, "Oh, oh, oh. Someone wants to talk to me."
- JRJoe Rogan
It was very exciting.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
"Oh, to talk to me." And then you get older and you realize, "Well, please leave me alone. Who the fuck is this mail?"
- JRJoe Rogan
You've got mail. Yeah, it was exciting.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
It was like a new thing.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
That was '96, like '95.
- JRJoe Rogan
That's when you got online?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah, yeah. '95, '96. We had an old CompuServe, um, account at the house.
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
And that was how we got online. And then we started getting the AOL disk and all of that shit. We had a Compaq Presario computer.
- JRJoe Rogan
Ooh, I had one of those. I had one of those. I started out with one of those old Macs that was like a beige box. Remember when they used to be beige?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Oh yeah, the Apple IIe.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, I don't remember what number it was, but it was '95, '94, somewhere around there.
- 6:45 – 9:46
Flight simulators to VR: immersion, workouts, and haptic feedback
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... a MacBook, man. It, he had a, um, a old school Macintosh in the '90s, and he had Microsoft Flight Simulator, and you couldn't tell me shit. I-
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs)
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... would go to his house, and for five hours we'd just fly Cessnas-
- JRJoe Rogan
S- s- s- (hisses) .
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... in real time. Like, I get it now. I get why people will sit down with a flight simulator and fly in real time from LA to San Francisco.
- JRJoe Rogan
Have you seen the new ones they have?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Oh, it's unreal, but I would need-
- JRJoe Rogan
Incredible.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... I would need to buy a PC, and then I know I wouldn't get shit done.
- JRJoe Rogan
Have you ever used the HTC VIVE?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
No.
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh, boy, we have one here.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Wait, what's that? What is that?
- JRJoe Rogan
V- virtual reality. We have one here.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Oh, the whole helmet, sit-down joint.
- JRJoe Rogan
Dude, my kids come here, and they battle to the death to see who gets the VR. They fight each other-
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
(laughs)
- JRJoe Rogan
... punching, kicking shit. It's amazing, man. You put this thing on, and like, you're in another world. You're, you're fighting zombies, you're in the ocean with, with, with whales and shit.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
I went to a Samsung event, and they had some AR-type experience where you put the phone on, and, and it's fun, but then I just-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... I don't know. In the back of my head I can't get, I can't get out of my head how goofy I look to someone else.
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
So it's almost like something I gotta do alone.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yes, you look goofy. You look really goofy when you put ... There's a boxing game now that you can get a great workout in, like a legitimate great workout, because this dude comes at you, you see him, he's throwing punches-
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
(laughs)
- JRJoe Rogan
... and every time he hits you, you see a bright white spark.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
(laughs)
- JRJoe Rogan
And, it's like you feel like you're getting hit. It's wild, man. You're moving around and bobbing and ducking punches and throwing combinations, and your feet start hurting- But- ... your hands get tired.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Is that gonna catch on for real, Joe? Or is this like the Nintendo Wii when it first came out-
- JRJoe Rogan
Nah, it's gonna catch on.
- 9:46 – 12:11
Isolation tanks, overactive minds, and Roy’s “puzzle therapy”
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Now that, that I would be, I would be all in for. I, and you know, when I was listening to you coming up, like, you started talking about the sensory deprivation chambers, and I'm like, that's always been something that's in the back of my head of like-
- JRJoe Rogan
You wanna do it?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
It's like-
- JRJoe Rogan
Do you have any time today? You could do it.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Um, I don't know how much time I have after. Let- let's see.
- JRJoe Rogan
Okay.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
It's, it ... I know, 'cause I know it's a mind fuck.
- JRJoe Rogan
It's a little bit of a mind fuck.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah, but it's, it's, it's one of those things where I go, "When I get a house, I'm getting a grill and I'm getting one of those goddamn Joe Rogan boxes."
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs)
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
That's what I call them. (laughs)
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs)
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Getting one of them Joe Rogan boxes, and I'm putting that shit in my fucking man cave.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah. Everybody should have an isolation tank. It's a, it's a fucking beautiful thing to have, man. It just, it, it settles your mind like nothing else.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah, that's, that's the thing that I always struggle with is just too many ... I got too many tabs open.
- JRJoe Rogan
Of course. Yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
At all times. And so-
- JRJoe Rogan
Most comics do.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah, and the only thing that slows me down is video games and puzzles.
- JRJoe Rogan
Puzzles?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
What kind of puzzles? Those are ... Like- What, putting pictures to puzzles?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Jigsaw-
- JRJoe Rogan
Really?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... and Sudoku.
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Those are ... Like, those are the three things that I can do that I know immediately, the moment I start the activity, everything closes-
- JRJoe Rogan
Interesting.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... and I'm focused on that one thing. It's the only thing that I can do when I need to get my mind off of stuff. I was dating this girl one time, and you know, you know you're in the middle of an argument, and so you're trying not to, you're trying not to be a dick in the moment, so I just start doing the puzzle and just trying to stay calm, and then she walks over-
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs)
- 12:11 – 15:10
Living in New York for The Daily Show: hustle culture, parenting, and where to settle
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
I'm in New York right now. There's nowhere to put a fucking thing.
- JRJoe Rogan
You live in the city?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah. There's nowhere to fucking do that.
- JRJoe Rogan
Do you like living in the city?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
No.
- JRJoe Rogan
Do ... Why are you there?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Uh, 'cause The Daily Show.
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh, right.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
It's ... I gotta work.
- JRJoe Rogan
You have to be, yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
So that's where the fucking job is, so-
- JRJoe Rogan
Did you think about like commuting?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... I take a train from Brooklyn. Yeah, I thought about it at first, but then I had a kid the same year I got the show-So, I needed to be closer, so we got to Harlem. So, Harlem is at least a shorter commute to the studio.
- JRJoe Rogan
How far? Where's the studio at?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
The studio's on West Side, Hill's Kitchen, on the water.
- JRJoe Rogan
Okay.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
So, it's like 53rd, 54th Street. And we're, like, in the 130s. So-
- JRJoe Rogan
So it's not too bad-
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
No. It's-
- JRJoe Rogan
... to find a subway.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah. It's closer than Brooklyn.
- JRJoe Rogan
Right.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Which was where I was originally when I first got to New York. But-
- JRJoe Rogan
Did you take the subway from Brooklyn? Like, how-
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah. I tried to be a city boy. Uh, y- th- the problem is that I've gotten more done career-wise in New York in four years than I did the eight years I was in LA. ƒ (?) that.
- JRJoe Rogan
How so? Because of the show?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah, it's just New York. It's just more... I just f- there's more of a hustle mentality.
- JRJoe Rogan
Really?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah. I think so. I think that I'm more prone to run into comics that are going, going, going, going, going. And so when you're around that, it makes you wanna go, it makes you wanna write. 'Cause you see so-and-so working on a new bit and doing all of that.
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm.
- 15:10 – 20:59
Starting stand-up on the Southern road: Greyhound mics, mentorship, and cautionary tales
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Oh, yeah. My first nine years were all Southern.
- JRJoe Rogan
Where were you at?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
I was a road guy outta Alabama.
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
I started in Tallahassee and Birmingham, uh, where, like... In those days, like in '98, open mic was once a month per city.
- JRJoe Rogan
Wow.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
So every week, if you wanted to get on, you had to get on the Greyhound.
- JRJoe Rogan
Wow.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
And go to another fucking city.
- JRJoe Rogan
Dude, that's commitment.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
So that's the only way. And then we started creating stages, like, in the Panhandle, like from Fort Walton over to Jacksonville. You start meeting... Uh, yeah. You form a little, fucking network.
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
And this guy's got a Monday night at a shithole, this guy's got a Tuesday night at another shithole. And looking back on it, it was all trash stage time. That's the best you could do until you move.
- JRJoe Rogan
It is amazing though how many guys have crafted careers just doing that. Like, the will, the will to do, do time and to find spots and to find a place to work out.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
I would make the argument that I'm better off now as a comic, 20 years in, having started on the road instead of starting in a major market. Just because I feel like when you're a road guy, you meet every version of what your career could end up being when you're young. Because if you're, if you're San Fran, if you're a big city comic, you're only hanging with your peers. You run into the bigwigs every now and then, but it's some hi and bye bullshit at the comedy club, and then they go on their way. But when you do a weekend with Ron White and you get to watch him properly night after night after night, that's a fucking tutorial.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
And that's a fucking gift. And then you can do a weekend the very next weekend with a guy who's been doing it 30 years, hadn't written a new joke in 15, burnout, alcoholic, hates his kids, hates his wife.
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs)
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
And once I got to LA, you start seeing w- well, no. I know to avoid that because I'll end up like that dude.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yes.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
I know not to do that because I'll end up like that... There was a comic... Goddamn, I can't name names. There was a comic that used to w-... (laughs) He won custody (laughs) of his child. And the one thing in the court order was that she could not be around the comedy club. So you know what he did? He fucking brought her around the comedy club.
- JRJoe Rogan
Ugh.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
So as his feature, I watched his seven-year-old while he would go out and do his set.
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh, Jesus.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah. But that, that's the life.
- JRJoe Rogan
Did he lose custody of his kid because of that?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
I don't know. I haven't seen him since.
- JRJoe Rogan
Fuck. You can't bring your kid, a seven-year-old. I, I brought my kids when they were, like, uh, nine and seven outside a comedy club. And I, I let 'em peek-
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
(laughs)
- JRJoe Rogan
I let 'em peek in. It was at The Improv in Irvine. And I said c- th- 'cause we were all down there having dinner together and I did my show. And, uh, they, they were, like, right around the corner. I said, "Come on. Let me take you backstage. I'll show you what it's like." And I... And the show was about to start-
- 20:59 – 26:13
How comics write and avoid burnout: listening to sets, stimulus, and high-risk topics
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
But when do you eval sets? 'Cause that's where I start running into overlap in time, is figuring out the execution of comedy versus the preparation to do comedy.
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
So reviewing the sets, watching tapes.
- JRJoe Rogan
W- well, a big one-
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Do you block that out?
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah. A big one for me is t- the drive there and home. So it's 35 minutes, uh, to the store, 35 minutes home. So that's when I'm reviewing material. I listen to recordings so they have it Bluetooth'd on my phone.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Correct.
- JRJoe Rogan
So I, I do that through the speakers of the f- of the car.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Mm-hmm.
- JRJoe Rogan
And, um, that helps a lot. That helps a lot. That's gigantic. You know, like, uh, it also puts me in the mi-... I feel like the more sets you do, right, the tighter your standup is, but the more focus you put on your set, like, it's almost as good as, like, a half a set. Like, listening to a full set is like, uh, doing a half a set. That's how I think about it.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Agreed.
- JRJoe Rogan
Feel like the same way?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
You found all the extra, you, you found all the fat to trim.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah. You find the fat to trim and you also find, like, a spark. Like, "Oh, why did I say that? Ooh, there might be something there." And then-
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
... and then you gotta write that down. And then, and then I spend time just going over scribbles, like right here. You know, like, "straight pride parade." Like, little, okay, little scribbles.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
(laughs)
- JRJoe Rogan
You know what I mean? Like, "Okay, what was I thinking there? Oh, that's right, that's right, that's right, that..." And then I'll start adding stuff together. And then I spend time just straight out writing. The straight out writing time's almost always when everyone's asleep. So, like, when I come home from the store and it's, like, midnight or something like that, everyone is-
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
That's the best time.
- JRJoe Rogan
... it's the best time. Spark up a joint, fire up the old fucking laptop and... And that's when I write.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
There's, there's a time... The thing that I struggle with the most in writing is consumption. Um, Chappelle said something years ago in a magazine about how every comedian needs to understand how their joke machine works. And identifying the stimuli that you were encountering during the time when you were having a creative high in your, in the writing cycle.
- JRJoe Rogan
Hmm.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
When ideas are just popping and coming to you, document what was happening, what was going on during that time, and do your best to recreate those situations and scenarios to inspire writing when you have writer's block.
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
So I know for me, it's stuff that bores me or stuff that annoys me.
- JRJoe Rogan
Hmm.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Be it reading, magazines, TV, whatever. So I have to f- find time to watch shit that I don't like or can't stand, because I know my mind will wander into a place where I can write some stuff. But, like, to physically just sit and consume television... And that's what I have to start doing on the go. Like, I get it now. Like, I used to think these people were stupid, and now I'm one of those people who walks around staring at the fucking phone, watching my DVR on the train or something.
- JRJoe Rogan
Hmm.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Because I have to constantly take in so that when it is time to write, that there's something, that there's something worth writing there.
- JRJoe Rogan
I had a conversation with Theo Von about this last night, uh, where he, uh, he's burnt out and he had to cancel some shows. And I said, "What's going on?" And he said, "Man," he goes, "I just been going too hard, too hard, too much, too many weekends, you know, nine shows a week over and over and over again, seven, eight, nine, 10 weeks in a row." He goes, "I just, I need to stop." He goes, "I'm not taking anything in."
- 26:13 – 41:41
Dangerous innovation: extreme sports, MMA leg locks, and fighting stories
- JRJoe Rogan
Maybe they're worried about, like, those BMX dudes.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
(laughs)
- JRJoe Rogan
You know? Like, those BMX dudes, they started doing double flips and then they started doing flips, triple flips.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
And then a bunch of them started crashing and breaking their necks.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Oh, that fucking snowboard shit.
- JRJoe Rogan
(exhales)
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
That's insane-o.
- JRJoe Rogan
Snowboarding's crazy. Yeah. Those guys are crazy.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Snowboard freestyle?
- JRJoe Rogan
You're stuck on that thing, too. It's not like skis where your legs move.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
That one in the snowmobile.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Where they're coming over the handlebars of the snowmobile-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... and coming back down.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
I'm like, "No, man."
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
No.
- JRJoe Rogan
Anything with BMX bikes or motocross or any of those crazy white dudes that are doing flips.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
(laughs)
- JRJoe Rogan
It's all just, "Dude, how many flips can you do? Landing on your front tire." Like, "Ugh." And the, the wrecks, man. I, I spent an hour one night just watching wrecks, just watching guys try to do flips and land wrong. It's like, "Dude."
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Ah.
- JRJoe Rogan
You're just picturing nerves getting ruined for life and spinal cord injuries.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Oh, it's all compound fractures.
- JRJoe Rogan
Ugh.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
There's a, a Birth of Big Air 30 for 30 where they talk about when they started that shit in the '80s in Oklahoma.
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs)
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
And they were just doing it for the love. Like, it was just a dude-
- 41:41 – 46:14
Comedy clubs in the social-media era: IG/Vine/YouTube comics, gatekeepers, and new lines
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
You ever get scared that the young people don't really go to clubs, don't really fuck with clubs?
- JRJoe Rogan
Yes. Yes, I do. Yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
It's gonna change the business model like in the next decade.
- JRJoe Rogan
Well, i- one of the beautiful things about comedy clubs though is that we all use them. Like, even if you're doing arenas, like you use comedy clubs. You use comedy clubs to exercise. Like Chappelle comes in all the time and does the Belly Room. That's a 70 seat room.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
(laughs)
- JRJoe Rogan
That dude just strolls on in, it'll be half full.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Intimate.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yep, and he'll do 40 fucking minutes. And that is so critical, man. It's so, it's so important to get that work in.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
That's why I don't like when a lot of the vets attack the, as they call them, Instagram comedians.
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Or the Vine or not Vine anymore.
- JRJoe Rogan
YouTube comedians, yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
But you know what the fuck I'm saying. Yeah, they get mad at them because the club will book them and they'll go, "Well, the live show is trash and it's terrible." And it's true for most of them, it's not the greatest performance 'cause they haven't had the chops yet.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
But they sold 300 paid tickets and everybody ate and drank. What do you think is keeping the lights on for your 30% selling capacity ass?
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs)
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... to come back in next year-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... and the next year, to go from 30% sold to 40% sold, to s- they're not making no money off of you.
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
But if these IG comedians can come in and at least help keep the lights on, I think in the greater, in the greater scheme of comedy, there's more good than bad-
- JRJoe Rogan
I agree.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... that comes from that. And I also feel like there's, there's a, there's a level of ignoring the tools that they've been able to use to get an audience, in lieu of the fact that they don't put new standup on TV anymore, unless it's contest shit. Comedy Central just started with the, I mean, with the Live at the Cellar shit, but other than that, I mean, there hasn't been a lot.
- JRJoe Rogan
Well, no one's even watching TV anymore. I mean, the numbers on regular TV programs are so low now. Like, if you're doing a set on Conan, like what is, w- did... We went over this, right? Like, the numbers are like, less than 400,000 people watch it a night.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah, that's li- that might be live plus three-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... on top of that. That might not even be just live, that might be live plus DVR over the-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... next three days.
- JRJoe Rogan
It's crazy. So no one's watching anything anymore. If you can get onto a stage... The way I feel about Instagram comedians or YouTube comedians is, if you're doing standup, you're a comic. You might be a shitty comic, and you might be a famous shitty comic because you're famous from Vine, or whatever the fuck it is. But who c- You're a comic. Like, it's whether or not you decide to become a real comic, and actually do the work and put in the time, and then one day be... Look, I hope that w- we see these YouTube comics and they're fucking terrible, and then you go to see them seven, eight years later and they're murdering, they're crushing, with great timing-
- 46:14 – 57:12
DIY media mindset: guerrilla filmmaking, editing skills, and how podcasts/industries get disrupted
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yo, I read a book, um, Rebel Without a Crew. I think it's, um, I think Rich Rodriguez, I think is, I think is his name. And he was a filmmaker, and he made the... I can't remember the name of the movie, but it was the prequel to what became Desperado. And-
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh, Robert tar- Rodriguez?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yes.
- JRJoe Rogan
Is it that guy? Yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
And he talked about just shooting that shit guerrilla and for, essentially pennies, less than $10,000, shot a whole ass film, and walks through how he cut the corners. And then you think of how they shot Paranormal Activity for, what, like $55,000? 50 or $60,000? The first Paranormal Activity was dirt cheap. They shot the first Saw for a million dollars in 30 days in one building.
- JRJoe Rogan
Whoa.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Every, in every scene in a car, they're just shaking the fucking camera and jump cutting.
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs)
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Billion dollar franchise getting rebooted now. Like, that, like when I see shit like that, I don't get jealous. I go, "Well, fuck, I need to go and fucking guerrilla some shit together and learn."
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
So that's why I started trying to learn, like, fucking video editing, audio editing, all that shit, man, so I can-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, no, it's inspiring. I love when, when I walked in the greenroom and I saw you fucking with that software. I love when people are hustling, when they're doing things like that, learning new things. And you're like, "You know what? Fuck this Final Cut Pro shit, I'm gonna learn a- Adobe Premier. They keep fucking with me, making me buy a new version every year."
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yep. Now, to be fair, Adobe makes you rent the shit, but-
- JRJoe Rogan
They do?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... I think there's a way to, yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
Microsoft does that too now, with like, O- Office.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah, a whole office suite-
- JRJoe Rogan
You rent it.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... you pay like $80 a year-
- JRJoe Rogan
There's so many crooks out there.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... for the access to it.
- JRJoe Rogan
Just crooks, crooks.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
And then you can't use the old version of Office-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... with the new... And if I send you a file that's like Office '03, you can't open it with the new Off- like it opens-
- JRJoe Rogan
Really?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... as a TXT file with no form- Like, they do it to fuck you.
- JRJoe Rogan
Exhales ] I barely use Office. I use it, I have it, but I, I write with WriteRoom for the most part. Do you know what that is?
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
No.
- JRJoe Rogan
It turns-
- 57:12 – 1:07:51
Porn industry realities: free content, cam sites, strip-club touring, and the weird economics of sex
- JRJoe Rogan
Boy, they just gutted that record business, didn't they? That is crazy what happened with the internet. The internet took out porn and-
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Mm-hmm.
- NANarrator
(laughs)
- JRJoe Rogan
... (laughs) and took out music by the knees.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
(laughs)
- JRJoe Rogan
I used to have a fucking neighbor, he lived right down the street, like two houses down from me, this crazy porn dude. I used to do jujitsu with him too, he was all steroided up and maniac and wild eyes. Dude was just crazy, just-
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Like coke?
- JRJoe Rogan
Yes. It was coke and steroids and he was just fucking up a storm constantly. I'd pull in his, like past his house and he's a- always had this fat Mercedes parked in his driveway and all hot girls in their underwear walking around. It was hilarious. This dude was a maniac, but then they, the internet came around. The internet just gutted his business, just gutted. And they repossessed his house. I'll never forget, man.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Damn, huh?
- JRJoe Rogan
His, his fucking house got repossessed. And I remember, uh, seeing it in the, um, like the real estate section. I was like, "Fuck, man, that dude lost his house."
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah, I'd say-
- JRJoe Rogan
He was rich. He had a fat fucking Rolex with diamonds all over it.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Porn got really fucked over. But you, you wanna talk about the people selecting what they wanna see, that's... W- What's, what's a bigger focus group than people who wanna fucking jack off?
- JRJoe Rogan
Right.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
And they've decided, "I would rather see somebody in the hood in their house with no lighting and just terrible fucking camera work."
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs)
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
And that's not as interesting.
- JRJoe Rogan
That's not it. What it was it, is that porn became free and they just used ad clicks and they would just pirate everyone's porn.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
Say if you were a porn producer and you were making a bunch of porn, they would just take your porn and put it on like whatever website, and then you would have to like get a lawyer to try to take it down.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
Yeah. It was like some LimeWire to the 80th power.
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
It was like-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yes.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
... way worse than LimeWire.
- JRJoe Rogan
Gutted the entire business.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
But you don't think the free side and like the amateur porn is part of it too?
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh yeah, that's big too.
- RJRoy Wood Jr.
I mean, that's bigger now but in the beginning yes, it was just porn clips getting chopped up and nobody paying $40 for a five hour DVD-
- JRJoe Rogan
You know what I noticed lately?
Episode duration: 2:50:19
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Transcript of episode Iaf5g9oT0mA
