Joe Rogan Experience #1354 - The Black Keys

1. 0:00 – 15:00

   Boom, and we're, we're…

   1. JRJoe Rogan0:01

      Boom, and we're, we're moving. We're moving, gentlemen.

   2. DADan Auerbach0:04

      All right. Well, we're moving.

   3. PCPatrick Carney0:05

      Good to see you.

   4. JRJoe Rogan0:06

      Thanks for being here.

   5. DADan Auerbach0:07

      Thanks for having us.

   6. JRJoe Rogan0:07

      I'm a gigantic fan.

   7. DADan Auerbach0:09

      We're fans of yours.

   8. JRJoe Rogan0:09

      You already know that, but, uh, now I get to tell you in person.

   9. DADan Auerbach0:12

      Uh, I'm a big fan of yours, man.

   10. JRJoe Rogan0:13

       Well, thanks.

   11. DADan Auerbach0:14

       You've become my... We were just saying on the way here, you've become my, uh, my late night television. I don't watch... I don't watch, like, uh, you know, Jimmy Fallon or anything. I put on your podcast on YouTube and just watch it.

   12. PCPatrick Carney0:29

       Just blew his fucking mind. Look at him. (laughs)

   13. JRJoe Rogan0:30

       Thank you.

   14. DADan Auerbach0:31

       But you're also like my Op-

   15. PCPatrick Carney0:32

       Glad, glad you like it.

   16. DADan Auerbach0:32

       You're also like my Oprah.

   17. PCPatrick Carney0:33

       (laughs)

   18. DADan Auerbach0:33

       And I was thinking, like, you need a whole cast. You need, like, a Gayle King and a-

   19. JRJoe Rogan0:38

       I do.

   20. DADan Auerbach0:38

       I'm willing to be your Dr. Phil.

   21. JRJoe Rogan0:40

       Ooh.

   22. DADan Auerbach0:40

       Yeah.

   23. JRJoe Rogan0:41

       I need a science advisor.

   24. DADan Auerbach0:42

       (laughs)

   25. JRJoe Rogan0:42

       I definitely need a real on, on-staff scientist to check things.

   26. DADan Auerbach0:46

       Like Dr., uh, Oz?

   27. JRJoe Rogan0:48

       No, he's not real.

   28. DADan Auerbach0:49

       And that's what I'm saying, you n- you need the-

   29. JRJoe Rogan0:51

       No, I need a real one.

   30. DADan Auerbach0:52

       (laughs) Okay.
2. 15:00 – 30:00

   It makes you speedy,…

   1. JRJoe Rogan15:00

      speedy, right?

   2. DADan Auerbach15:01

      It makes you speedy, it makes you, it just, it s- satiates your appetite completely.

   3. JRJoe Rogan15:06

      Yeah.

   4. DADan Auerbach15:06

      You don't, like I w- I eat, I eat like normal meals now and I've gained weight. But before, I was realizing I was just like barely eating food.

   5. JRJoe Rogan15:13

      My friend Tony smokes, and he, he went down to the Juul, then he quit that to- uh, totally. Tony Hinchcliffe. And, um, he would smoke cigarettes before a show. I go, "Gimme one of those things." I go, "What does that do for you?" I go, "Gimme one of those things." And I, I lit it, and I, I hadn't smoked a cigarette in, you know, more than a decade. And I had, the last time I did, I did it for like a play. Uh, I couldn't believe how high I got. I'm like, "Oh my God, this gets you so high."

   6. DADan Auerbach15:40

      Yeah.

   7. JRJoe Rogan15:40

      Like, it's crazy how-

   8. DADan Auerbach15:41

      Well yeah, but it does the first couple and then-

   9. JRJoe Rogan15:43

      You chase the dragon.

   10. DADan Auerbach15:44

       ... once you're back in there-

   11. JRJoe Rogan15:46

       Yeah.

   12. DADan Auerbach15:46

       ... then you're not getting that effect.

   13. JRJoe Rogan15:47

       But it's, it is amazing.

   14. DADan Auerbach15:49

       Yeah.

   15. JRJoe Rogan15:49

       Like on its own, like what the, the hit that you get from a cigarette.

   16. DADan Auerbach15:52

       Yeah.

   17. JRJoe Rogan15:52

       I'm like, "Holy shit, I feel great."

   18. DADan Auerbach15:54

       Well, I do.

   19. PCPatrick Carney15:55

       (laughs)

   20. DADan Auerbach15:55

       Like I don't, I feel like, uh-

   21. PCPatrick Carney15:57

       (coughs)

   22. DADan Auerbach15:57

       ... every once in a while I'll, I'll, it'll be in a situation where I'll be like, "Oh man, I actually really do want a cigarette." But instantly I'm like, that will mean (taps fingers) for me, buying a whole pack-

   23. JRJoe Rogan16:09

       Mm-hmm.

   24. DADan Auerbach16:10

       ... being right back on it. Although I was like, I was like, "Well maybe, maybe I'll go th- do, give myself one weekend a year and I'll just torture myself, and allow myself to look forward to that one weekend a year, smoke some cigarettes." And it, and it, and it-

   25. JRJoe Rogan16:22

       If you can make that kind of deal with yourself, I think that's possible.

   26. DADan Auerbach16:24

       I think I'm capable of it, 'cause I do have pretty good willpower. I mean, I was able to quit just like cold turkey.

   27. JRJoe Rogan16:29

       They, the people that would be like addiction specialists would tell you that you're fooling yourself.

   28. DADan Auerbach16:33

       You're fooling yourself, buddy.

   29. JRJoe Rogan16:34

       If I try to pretend, uh, I'm an addictions, let's say-

   30. DADan Auerbach16:36

       Yeah.
3. 30:00 – 45:00

   (exhales) …

   1. DADan Auerbach30:00

      everything. Just s- you know, just, uh, sit tight." It was- it was like, "Fuck."

   2. (exhales)

   3. JRJoe Rogan30:07

      (laughs)

   4. DADan Auerbach30:07

      Yeah, it was like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

   5. JRJoe Rogan30:09

      Do you think they have PTSD? Do you think, like, emergency room doctors have PTSD?

   6. DADan Auerbach30:13

      Well-

   7. JRJoe Rogan30:13

      They have to, right?

   8. DADan Auerbach30:14

      Yeah. Oh, yeah.

   9. JRJoe Rogan30:15

      Don't you think?

   10. DADan Auerbach30:16

       Well, the- well, the idea that this one person had to sit me down and tell me what was going on, and like, the look in this dude's eyes, it was like-He looked freaked out. But he wa- he, he wasn't calming me at all. You know what I mean? It was like-

   11. JRJoe Rogan30:29

       Right.

   12. DADan Auerbach30:29

       Yeah, but he also didn't wanna leave ... You know, he couldn't pretend it was gonna be okay. But yeah, I, I can't-

   13. JRJoe Rogan30:34

       Can you imagine having to have those conversations with someone?

   14. DADan Auerbach30:36

       I can't imagine it.

   15. Yeah, every day, multiple times.

   16. I can't imagine it.

   17. JRJoe Rogan30:39

       Yeah. People get mad at you sometimes.

   18. DADan Auerbach30:42

       No, man. I can't imagine it. It's the, it's, I th- I could never do that job.

   19. JRJoe Rogan30:47

       I think we don't think of them as experiencing it traumatically because they're doctors. We think they should be able to handle it.

   20. DADan Auerbach30:54

       Right.

   21. JRJoe Rogan30:55

       But I mean, they're just, they're also humans, who are seeing dead humans.

   22. DADan Auerbach30:58

       Yeah, yeah.

   23. JRJoe Rogan30:58

       Like, those consequences affect every one of us. With, y- when you look at that all the time, I don't buy that you don't experience some form of like, intense stress.

   24. DADan Auerbach31:08

       I mean, I've experienced ex- intense stress from doing the thing I love the most, which is playing, playing concerts. You know what I mean? I've experienced it firsthand, where it's like ... And it f- that's way different.

   25. JRJoe Rogan31:19

       When does it hit you? Like when-

   26. DADan Auerbach31:21

       (laughs)

   27. Obviously I'm not like-

   28. JRJoe Rogan31:22

       Yeah.

   29. DADan Auerbach31:22

       ... telling someone their fucking loved one's like, about to fucking die. But uh-

   30. JRJoe Rogan31:28

       Do you still feel e- periods of stress?
4. 45:00 – 1:00:00

   (laughs) …

   1. DADan Auerbach45:00

      like, k- that's my response to the question. I'm thinking about something else, and then we get in the car and we leave. And then the next morning, I wake up to a tweet. This is right at the height of the anti-bullying shit too, which is like, you know, Justin Bieber, like, "Don't bully motherfucker..." he's like, "The drummer from The Black Keys should get slapped."

   2. JRJoe Rogan45:17

      (laughs)

   3. DADan Auerbach45:18

      And I, at the time, I was like, thought it was the funniest fucking thing that's ever happened. But I was like, "You know what? I can't deal with any of that shit." Like, I don't want any of that shit. Um. (laughs) Uh, and so I realized like, that's, that was my experience about the, my apprehension about playing the Grammies all came back to that. It was like, "What is the fucking Grammy?"

   4. JRJoe Rogan45:40

      Yeah.

   5. DADan Auerbach45:40

      "What is this shit?" And it was like, we're just jerking ourselves off, like congratulating ourselves. Does anybody watch this shit that really cares about us? I, I don't think so.

   6. JRJoe Rogan45:49

      But also, what if there's like 12 great bands? Does only one of them win the Grammy of the Year, right? Is there second place, third place, or is there anything like that? Like, the idea of judging art is always weird. But to judge like one? You got one? You pick one?

   7. DADan Auerbach46:06

      And y- it's-

   8. JRJoe Rogan46:06

      Out of all these that are awesome?

   9. DADan Auerbach46:08

      It's also like, it's, it's, uh, you know, ultimately, it's no different than any other election. It, it, it-

   10. JRJoe Rogan46:16

       Yeah.

   11. DADan Auerbach46:16

       Like, uh, the year that we were nominated for Album of the Year, so was, so was Jack White. So our, we split our votes, you know what I mean? Like someone-

   12. JRJoe Rogan46:24

       Right.

   13. DADan Auerbach46:24

       ... had, someone had to either vote for us or Jack, or like Mumford & Sons. It's ultimately complete nonsense, you know what I mean?

   14. JRJoe Rogan46:30

       It s- it seems like it perverts the love th- of the thing. 'Cause it's like, what you guys do is awesome. I love your music. But I, I feel you're m- like, I just want you to do it. You know? Just when there's little contests, and this is number one, and this one wins-

   15. DADan Auerbach46:48

       Mm-hmm.

   16. JRJoe Rogan46:48

       ... this, and this is the Band of the Year, and the Album of the Year, like says who and why is it a contest? Can't it just be this is awesome shit? Here's some different awesome shit. Well, that, that's why we didn't...

   17. DADan Auerbach46:57

       Yeah.

   18. JRJoe Rogan46:57

       That's why we didn't bundle.

   19. DADan Auerbach46:58

       That was the whole motivation behind this record, was like, it was to not, um, not partake in the current bullshit in the music industry, which is, so check this out. Do you mind if I explain it?

   20. JRJoe Rogan47:13

       Please do.

   21. DADan Auerbach47:13

       Okay. We had a conversation with our manager, um, about this record, right, you know, release. We, and it like, it went from everything like, "We have f- family, we don't really wanna be on the road for 100 days this year. We don't necessarily wanna do anything we don't, we don't wanna do anything we're not excited about." You know, so it came down to the promotion and stuff, and it was basically it was like, "We wanna get in front of people and play our songs and have fun. You know?" And uh, and the conversation came up with about the actual album, like, um, Warner Brothers was interested if we wanted to bundle it. Which is when you include the record like, with a ticket. Right? And a lot of people have been doing it, whether you buy a T-shirt and you get a record, and it's a digital download link. Um, and I was like, "Well, how does that work?" And they're like, "Well, um, you, uh, you would give $5 from each ticket back to Warner Brothers. And then you would get a record sale." And I was like, "That doesn't make, that doesn't make any sense to, to me, and to Dan." And they're like, "Yeah, I know, well, you would, you, it's the only way you're gonna get a number one record. So if you want a number one record, you gotta do that." And I was like, "Well," I was like, "Well, um, so it's one-to-one, like we give five bucks back and then we get a royalty and we get a ticket sale?" They're like, "No, you don't get a royalty. And you only get a ti- you only get a album count- sale count if they click the link." And they have like, we have a 50% click-through. So, in other words, we would pay $10 per sale on Nielsen SoundScan...... by giving the money back that we've sold on tickets, uh, to Warner Brothers, to our record label." I was like, "Fuck that. Fuck that shit."

   22. JRJoe Rogan48:58

       Wow.

   23. DADan Auerbach48:59

       At this point-

   24. JRJoe Rogan49:00

       That is a crazy deal.

   25. DADan Auerbach49:01

       Check it out, we've sold 250,000 tickets on this tour. So we would give back 1.25 million. Our record advance for this record was less than that. So that, so it, I was like, if Dan and I were just doing our own record label, we could give ourselves $5 per ticket and count, and we just keep the, we just take the money from the right hand to the left hand, give you a link, if you counted it, we get the sale, we keep the money. That's basically what the fuck was going on. You know what I mean? And it's a, it's all based on fear, like all of this shit. It's like, do you wanna be relevant, you know? That's basically the conversation that, that is basically being had, not that direct, but it's like, as an artist, you better try to get a, get good numbers, get that sh- first week up there. And Dan and I are basically like, "Fuck that. Fuck it. It doesn't even fucking matter." People are gonna come to the shows or they're not gonna come to the shows. We're gonna make records, people are gonna buy them or they're not gonna buy them. Um, and I think that it's really, it's detrimental to the music industry, like to, (sighs) to pay too close attention to certain metrics, man. It's like, the, the whole system right now with these majors is like signing shit that has the most social media interaction, the most streaming. And I was like, you know what? When I was nine years old, I bought Vanilla Ice's Ice Ice Baby.

   26. JRJoe Rogan50:18

       (laughs)

   27. DADan Auerbach50:18

       And I listened to that shit, like-

   28. JRJoe Rogan50:20

       (laughs)

   29. DADan Auerbach50:20

       ... I'm not joking, like 250 times in a week.

   30. JRJoe Rogan50:22

       (laughs)
5. 1:00:00 – 1:06:52

   (laughs) …

   1. DADan Auerbach1:00:00

      the back of the van also. All the windows had this-

   2. JRJoe Rogan1:00:02

      (laughs)

   3. DADan Auerbach1:00:02

      ... really dark, dark tint, black tint.

   4. JRJoe Rogan1:00:04

      Oh.

   5. DADan Auerbach1:00:05

      So we were just in this panic van. You know?

   6. JRJoe Rogan1:00:07

      Yeah, you needed to get outside.

   7. DADan Auerbach1:00:09

      You know, it's dark. Yeah. I remember when the sliding door went open, it was like when they went into Willy Wonka's place.

   8. JRJoe Rogan1:00:14

      Yeah.

   9. DADan Auerbach1:00:14

      Yeah. All the light came in, and ...

   10. Yeah.

   11. And then it seemed like ... It was crazy, 'cause when we got back in the van three fucking hours later, like, our driver's like, "Dude, we gotta go." I was like, "We've been here for 20 minutes." He's like, "It's been three hours-"

   12. (laughs)

   13. JRJoe Rogan1:00:27

       Oh my God.

   14. DADan Auerbach1:00:27

       "... of you guys look- la- talking about this dumpster."

   15. JRJoe Rogan1:00:30

       (laughs)

   16. DADan Auerbach1:00:30

       (laughs)

   17. And I was like, "No way."

   18. JRJoe Rogan1:00:33

       (clapping)

   19. DADan Auerbach1:00:33

       (laughs)

   20. So we, we get back in, and Dan's ... Dan, like, outta nowhere, his girlfriend I guess maybe had the, at the time, he was like, "Do you want some bubble gum?" And it, uh, for ... Uh, we'd been on tour for a month, and I'd never seen this bag. It was, like, a trash bag full of gumballs.

   21. (laughs)

   22. JRJoe Rogan1:00:46

       (laughs)

   23. DADan Auerbach1:00:46

       And I was like, "Oh my God, what the fuck's happening?"

   24. (laughs)

   25. He's like, "Let's listen to some music, man." And so he put on NWA, and I was like ... We both started laughing. I was like, 'cause it sounded like-... Fisher-Price music.

   26. JRJoe Rogan1:00:59

       (laughs)

   27. DADan Auerbach1:01:00

       Like, so plastic and brittle, and like (singing) . I was like, "This is so bad. This is so awful." And then, he put on Captain Beefheart: Safe As Milk, and it was, like, the most incredible sounding record I'd ever heard. It was fucking insane. But it was that experience that first opened up me ever experiencing that, like, "What the fuck's happening?" Like, kind of fight or flight, but for no reason, panic attack thing. (breathes deeply) And I think, yeah, I- I- I- I deal with it mostly, but I just, uh, when I'm on stage I still get them occasionally. If I come in too fast or something.

   28. JRJoe Rogan1:01:36

       Are you saying that it was started from that trip?

   29. DADan Auerbach1:01:38

       It's the first time I've ever felt it, man.

   30. JRJoe Rogan1:01:40

       Wow. Do you think you broke something in there?

Episode duration: 3:13:47