Joe Rogan Experience #1431 - Owen Smith

Owen Smith is a comedian, writer, actor and television producer. https://textowen.com/

Joe RoganhostOwen SmithguestGuestguest

Feb 25, 20202h 33mWatch on YouTube ↗

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150 min read · 30,016 words

0:00 – 0:55
Yoga with Russell Simmons: celebrity classes, breathing, and “voluntary difficulty”
1. JRJoe Rogan
  It is?
2. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Three, two-
4. OSOwen Smith
  D-
5. JRJoe Rogan
  ... one, boom. And we're live.
6. OSOwen Smith
  Oh.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  We're talking about yoga and-
8. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  ... Russell Simmons?
10. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  Russell Simmons, he moved to Bali because he's worried about them extraditing him?
12. OSOwen Smith
  I don't know if he's worried, but I, I, and this is all-
13. JRJoe Rogan
  Really?
14. OSOwen Smith
  ... this is, I'm, this is all conjecture. This is what I've heard.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  Right.
16. OSOwen Smith
  But I, I, I just brought him up because, um, we, we had a yoga studio here.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  Did he?
18. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah, and he gave me a month free. A month free, high-end yoga thing, like you just show up in your clothes. They give you the mat, towels-
19. JRJoe Rogan
  Really?
20. OSOwen Smith
  ... blocks, everything, and everybody was awesome. And I went every day for a month and did yoga next to Russell Simmons.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Wow.
22. OSOwen Smith
  And he was, like, amazing. And, uh, and I was, like, really feeling it. I felt great. And then, uh, all the stuff happened. (laughs)
23. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs) It's so easy to slide.
24. OSOwen Smith
  Oh, man. Oh, man.
25. JRJoe Rogan
  It's so easy to slide away.
0:55 – 7:05
Raw vs. polished comedy—and Owen’s Def Jam baptism by fire
1. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah, man, I, I, I love that guy dearly. I have a funny story. What do you think is more important in standup, uh, to be polished or to be raw?
2. JRJoe Rogan
  There's no more important thing. They're-
3. OSOwen Smith
  Mm-hmm.
4. JRJoe Rogan
  They're both very important, but Joey Diaz is not polished at all-
5. OSOwen Smith
  Mm-hmm.
6. JRJoe Rogan
  ... and he's the funniest guy that I've ever seen.
7. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah.
8. JRJoe Rogan
  No one's ever made me laugh harder.
9. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah.
10. JRJoe Rogan
  He's not polished. He's raw as fuck.
11. OSOwen Smith
  He's just, but it's, but it's real.
12. JRJoe Rogan
  But raw alone is not good because some guys, like Jeselnik is very polished-
13. OSOwen Smith
  Right.
14. JRJoe Rogan
  ... and he's very funny.
15. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah.
16. JRJoe Rogan
  You're very polished.
17. OSOwen Smith
  Thank you.
18. JRJoe Rogan
  You're very funny.
19. OSOwen Smith
  Yes.
20. JRJoe Rogan
  It's, there's no, there's no one thing, you know? It's like comedy is a, it's a art, you know?
21. OSOwen Smith
  It's a art, right?
22. JRJoe Rogan
  It's an expression of who you are. If you're a polished person and you try to come off raw, it's gonna look corny.
23. OSOwen Smith
  So, so I, I brought that up because I am tw- I don't know, young 20s. Def Jam is having auditions. It just moved from New York to LA, and Beverly Hills was where they're taping, which was ironic in itself. And, uh, but I was raw. You, you remember those, when you go, "Hit it, DJ," and you have music cue, like, beats?
24. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
25. OSOwen Smith
  (laughs) So I auditioned and, uh, Bushwick Bill, uh, was one of the judges. It was like a... I auditioned at All Jokes Aside in Chicago and I got picked, I was one of the people to get picked to tape Def Jam. First time I was ever flown out anywhere, first time I ever came to, was flown to Los Angeles. I had been here before, stayed at the Hotel Sofitel.
26. JRJoe Rogan
  Whoa.
27. OSOwen Smith
  But what happened is I got picked, I was raw, about three months went by. I went on a tour of North Dakota, South Dakota, Minneapolis, where none of those Def Jam jokes worked.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
29. OSOwen Smith
  So I started, like, getting polished a little bit, right?
30. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
7:05 – 10:01
Celebrities in yoga class: Usher’s work ethic and the stigma of stretching
1. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
2. OSOwen Smith
  "... You th- (laughs) You used to come here?" And he just gave me a month free, and I was like, "Imma take it." And so every morning, I would wake up and drive, and I didn't know I was gonna be in his class. Like, Usher Raymond would be in there. He was flexible as hell, like-
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Really?
4. OSOwen Smith
  ... incredible. Yeah, like, all these people would be in there, and I was-
5. JRJoe Rogan
  Usher can fight.
6. OSOwen Smith
  I really started getting into it. Really?
7. JRJoe Rogan
  Have you ever seen him train?
8. OSOwen Smith
  No.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  Usher has videos online of him training at Black House, and he's legit.
10. OSOwen Smith
  Wow.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  Like, he's a legit, skilled fighter.
12. OSOwen Smith
  I believe it.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  Like, he's got, like, real good hands. He can throw kicks, everything.
14. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah. He is probably the Kobe of R&B.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  Really?
16. OSOwen Smith
  I feel like he outworks everybody. You know, when I saw him in yoga class, I was like, "Who else is doing this?" Like-
17. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
18. OSOwen Smith
  In your field, you know what I mean? (laughs)
19. JRJoe Rogan
  Right.
20. OSOwen Smith
  Like, uh, I don't know.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Yoga is something you don't get any credit for doing.
22. OSOwen Smith
  No.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  'Cause it's, it's fucking hard as shit, but it seems like no big deal. Like if you say, "Oh, I ran seven miles today," people are like, "Whoa."
24. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah, that's impressive.
25. JRJoe Rogan
  If you say, "I did yoga today," they're like, "Pfft."
26. OSOwen Smith
  Bitch ass was just-
27. JRJoe Rogan
  "Bitch ass stretching-
28. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
29. JRJoe Rogan
  ... with some old ladies." (laughs)
30. OSOwen Smith
  Dude, I ... That's ... But it's real, man. I, I, it ... I felt so good when I was doing it. And I, I, I don't think I, I didn't tell anybody I was doing it.
10:01 – 11:56
Hot Bikram humiliation, ego bruises, and why people actually pass out
1. OSOwen Smith
  So, before the Russell thing, I went to a hot Bikram class.
2. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, that's what I do.
3. OSOwen Smith
  And so I went to a hot Bikram, and this was when I was single, so I was basically just following the asses. Like-
4. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
5. OSOwen Smith
  ... "Yo, where y'all going?" (laughs)
6. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
7. OSOwen Smith
  "Y'all going? Hey," and I would go into there and, yeah, I remember it was a big room and everything was chill and, you know, I- I- I literally had never done this at all. I was literally pro- I just, you know, I don't know why, I don't know why. And I just remember they closed all the windows and they stopped the fans, and it started getting really hot. And I was doing the poses and I was shaking, and like you said, sweating profusely. And the only thing I knew was it was supposed to be a place of no judgment, they kept going, "It's, it's your journey, it's yoga practice, no judgment." The lady had the little mic thing, and she came over to me and she covered it and she whispered to me, "Are you all right?"
8. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
9. OSOwen Smith
  I was like, "I'm feeling judged." I was like, "I'm really feeling judged right now." (laughs)
10. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
11. OSOwen Smith
  That's how awful I must've looked. I was just, I, like, I couldn't ... And so I didn't really go back after that. My ego was bruised a little bit. And so I would do it at home sometimes.
12. JRJoe Rogan
  Preparing to go back?
13. OSOwen Smith
  (laughs) I was trying to practice yoga, son, so I could, so I could not get judged.
14. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
15. OSOwen Smith
  And when I left, like, she was like, the teacher was, like, on the cover of the magazine in front. I was like-
16. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
17. OSOwen Smith
  ... "Damn." Like, "She-"
18. JRJoe Rogan
  Legit.
19. OSOwen Smith
  Like, yeah, and so, but why she did it, it was so funny. She was like, "Are you all right?" (laughs)
20. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
21. OSOwen Smith
  I was, like, trying to, like, trying to show off for these girls, man, and it was terrible.
22. JRJoe Rogan
  It's fucking hard, man.
23. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah.
24. JRJoe Rogan
  And, and the reason why they ask you if- if you alright is because sometimes people are not all right.
25. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah.
26. JRJoe Rogan
  Like, I've seen people almost black out where they have to lay down and-
27. OSOwen Smith
  Oh, yeah.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  ... 'cause it's n- 105 degrees in there. And if you're not used to that kind of exercise in that kind of temperature, if you have, you know, a per- if you're one of those people that just, that stuff gets to you and y- you can't hand-
29. OSOwen Smith
  You could pass out.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  ... can't handle it, yeah, you can-
11:56 – 13:50
Gym culture stories: dead body at Bally’s and the ‘membership trap’ business model
1. OSOwen Smith
  They don't need that. I remember, do you remember Bally's Gym?
2. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
3. OSOwen Smith
  I remember-
4. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
5. OSOwen Smith
  I used to live on, on, uh, so Bally's at the bottom of the hill, and I belonged to Bally's, you know. And, uh, I would go, you know, I went through a period-... so I'm going when it opens, and so I went, I think it opened at 6:00, maybe.
6. JRJoe Rogan
  Damn, you were a 6:00 in the morning guy.
7. OSOwen Smith
  I, I did that for a minute.
8. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
9. OSOwen Smith
  Get there, there's a line outside, I'm like, "How come we can't go in?" And this lady, (laughs) this lady was like, "Somebody's dead in the pool."
10. JRJoe Rogan
  Whoa.
11. OSOwen Smith
  It was a dead body, like, floating in, in the Bally's.
12. JRJoe Rogan
  Whoa.
13. OSOwen Smith
  And then I never forget, this other lady goes, "At least he got out his contract." (laughs)
14. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
15. OSOwen Smith
  Like, not even, not even gave a second to like-
16. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
17. OSOwen Smith
  ... no moment of silence.
18. JRJoe Rogan
  Uh-huh.
19. OSOwen Smith
  'Cause Bally's was notorious for not letting you out.
20. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
21. OSOwen Smith
  "At least he got out his contract." And then, uh, everybody still waited, and-
22. JRJoe Rogan
  Well, 24 Hour Fitness is the weirdest one. They'll-
23. OSOwen Smith
  Oh, yeah.
24. JRJoe Rogan
  ... let you sign up for like 10 years for like a dollar a week.
25. OSOwen Smith
  Hilarious.
26. JRJoe Rogan
  They don't give a fuck.
27. OSOwen Smith
  Nah.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  They, they know you're not coming.
29. OSOwen Smith
  Right.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  They're like, "Oh yeah, yeah, yeah-
13:50 – 19:29
Basketball proximity: rebounding for Magic and getting cooked by Grant Hill
1. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah. I did Equinox for a second, I got to play basketball, uh, with Magic.
2. JRJoe Rogan
  Really?
3. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah, he was in there working out every morning.
4. JRJoe Rogan
  Wow.
5. OSOwen Smith
  This when I was on Arsenio too, so he had like-
6. JRJoe Rogan
  So he'd just play a pickup game with people?
7. OSOwen Smith
  No, I didn't get... He would, he would shoot around and I just kinda like made myself, like, available on the court. I'm just there when the ball went through the, through the rim, I went and got the rebound and I, I gave it to him and he shot another one, I got the rebound, I go...
8. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
9. OSOwen Smith
  "I always wanted to rebound for you."
10. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
11. OSOwen Smith
  And then I gave him a pass and he did the classic hook and he goes, "And now you got an assist." (laughs)
12. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs) That's hilarious.
13. OSOwen Smith
  And so... And th- and then, uh... 'Cause a lot of basketball players would come up there and I would look at them like, "Man, I'm glad I couldn't..." Like, Magic is huge, man. Like-
14. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
15. OSOwen Smith
  Have you seen him in person?
16. JRJoe Rogan
  No.
17. OSOwen Smith
  He's, he's huge.
18. JRJoe Rogan
  Huge.
19. OSOwen Smith
  And I'm 6'5". So-
20. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
21. OSOwen Smith
  But his back is, is like... I, I... Like I had hoop dreams until I, I played against Grant Hill in high school. Grant Hill is 6'9" and it was a Christmas tournament and my mom was there and my girlfriend at the time. Uh, shout out to, uh... Well, I'm married now, only.
22. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
23. OSOwen Smith
  But anyway, my girlfriend at the time (laughs) was there and, uh, I had a rah-rah section, you know? We were the home team and Grant Hill, uh, comes in and my coach had me check him. And I, I never, um... And I, I guarantee you he won't remember this, but, um, it's this thing called a crossover, right? And most people, if you cross over, I'm, I'm still in front of you. Grant was so long when he did... Put the ball from this hand to this hand, I (laughs) I had to literally slide two steps and then when he'd move back, I had to slide back two steps. And when he went up here, there was no way I could get up there.
24. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
25. OSOwen Smith
  And so I told my girlfriend, "Yo, go home."
26. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
27. OSOwen Smith
  Like, "Y'all don't need to see this." He scored like 60 points. (laughs)
28. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
29. OSOwen Smith
  He was shooting from half court, like he just looked at us like... I was like, "I, I'ma, uh, do well in school."
30. JRJoe Rogan
  That's a fascinating thing when you see someone who's a world-class athlete-
19:29 – 23:21
Greatness, obsession, and the Jordan vs. LeBron framing (family, motivation, variables)
1. OSOwen Smith
  I have a theory, I have a theory about that, I have a theory about that. So here's my thing. I feel like that's the wrong narrative. I feel like... M- so here's the... My, my, my friend and I, we w- we were talking about what is, um, greatness, right? Greatness is y- it's g- clearly the numbers and the accolades and the wins, but greatness is also being able to overcome great difficulty and still perform, right?
2. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
3. OSOwen Smith
  And so adding that into the formula, I feel like, out of everyone that's a part of the conversation, LeBron is the only one who never met his dad.
4. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
5. OSOwen Smith
  Like, Jordan knew his dad. Kobe, rest in peace, his dad played in the NBA. Magic knew his dad. Kareem knew his dad. It's a thing, you know? LeBron, tallest dude in Akron, walking around every day, y- y- he see another tall dude, he had to be like, "Dad, is that..." (laughs) You know what I mean?
6. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
7. OSOwen Smith
  Like, just mentally...
8. JRJoe Rogan
  Right.
9. OSOwen Smith
  And, like, who taught him the game? Like, Jordan had these great teachers and all that.
10. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
11. OSOwen Smith
  So I feel like the question should be... Michael Jordan is clearly the greatest of all time with two parents, but with one parent, LeBron is the greatest and Kevin Durant is, like, a s- uh, uh, coming up-
12. JRJoe Rogan
  That's an interesting way of looking at it.
13. OSOwen Smith
  Just because you, it'd be, it's different starting lines, you know?
14. JRJoe Rogan
  But there's so many different variables that take place-
15. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah.
16. JRJoe Rogan
  ... in your life from birth to death. To just isolate one factor, like not having a father.
17. OSOwen Smith
  Well, I'm, but I mean, it's like, all of m- Jordan talked about when he got cut from his team, his dad was the one who pushed him.
18. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm.
19. OSOwen Smith
  Like, he was his greatest-
20. JRJoe Rogan
  Right.
21. OSOwen Smith
  ... motivator. Like, he had that. Like, who was doing that for LeBron?
22. JRJoe Rogan
  LeBron.
23. OSOwen Smith
  Who taught him the game like-
24. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
25. OSOwen Smith
  ... Jordan went to NC State where Dean Smith was one of the greatest, you know? Jor- everyone talks about Jordan's fundamentals. Where did LeBron learn this from?
26. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm.
27. OSOwen Smith
  Who was teaching him this stuff? And if, and so it's, it's just a different space. And, and, and, and-
28. JRJoe Rogan
  So it's almost like saying-
29. OSOwen Smith
  ... and I relate to LeBron because I, I was raised by a single mom, so I recognize myself more in him than in Jordan.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm.
23:21 – 27:44
Heavyweight chess: Tyson Fury vs. Deontay Wilder tactical breakdown
1. JRJoe Rogan
  Did you see the Tyson Fury, Deontay Wilder fight?
2. OSOwen Smith
  I saw clips.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Holy shit.
4. OSOwen Smith
  Oh my gosh. Were you there?
5. JRJoe Rogan
  No.
6. OSOwen Smith
  Oh my gosh.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  No, I watched it at home. Holy shit.
8. OSOwen Smith
  How big is Fury though?
9. JRJoe Rogan
  Holy shit.
10. OSOwen Smith
  Fury's six...
11. JRJoe Rogan
  6'7".
12. OSOwen Smith
  Almost 300 pounds?
13. JRJoe Rogan
  No 6'9".
14. OSOwen Smith
  6'9".
15. JRJoe Rogan
  Deontay's 6'7", Fury's 6'9".
16. OSOwen Smith
  Whew.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  6'9", 270 pounds.
18. OSOwen Smith
  (exhales)
19. JRJoe Rogan
  And he just fig- he said he figured out in the first fight that Deontay... In the 12th round, he started backing Deontay up. Deontay can't fight backing up 'cause Deontay is a guy who pushes forward-
20. OSOwen Smith
  Mm-hmm.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  ... and he's got this ridiculous power.
22. OSOwen Smith
  Right.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  And everybody's scared of his power, so everybody's moving all the time. And Fury realized in the 12th round after Deontay knocked him down, almost knocked him out.
24. OSOwen Smith
  Mm-hmm.
25. JRJoe Rogan
  He got up and started chasing Deontay, and Deontay fought sloppy. He d- he said he looked awkward. He said his footwork didn't look so good. His-
26. OSOwen Smith
  Technique.
27. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, well it's... Deontay is known as being this guy who's got an eraser. His right hand's like an eraser.
28. OSOwen Smith
  (laughs)
29. JRJoe Rogan
  All the mistakes... Teddy Atlas put it this way, "All the mistakes of the previous rounds all get erased with one punch." Blah.
30. OSOwen Smith
  (laughs)
27:44 – 35:40
Owen’s audience-building pitch: textowen.com, specials, and TV’s collapse for comics
1. OSOwen Smith
  No. (laughs) I wanted to talk to you about... First, I wanna thank you, 'cause you've been very kind, uh, about just promoting my standup on this platform.
2. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, you're welcome. Dude, I'm, I'm-
3. OSOwen Smith
  And, uh...
4. JRJoe Rogan
  ... a huge fan.
5. OSOwen Smith
  Thank you, man. And, uh-
6. JRJoe Rogan
  You don't make any sense to me.
7. OSOwen Smith
  I know.
8. JRJoe Rogan
  You are one of the best comics in the world.
9. OSOwen Smith
  Thank you.
10. JRJoe Rogan
  And the fact that people don't know who you are, you should be filling arenas.
11. OSOwen Smith
  So I- so this is what I'm doing. Uh, I made something and I wanna give it to your viewers so they can watch it and judge for themselves if they just go to textowen.com.
12. JRJoe Rogan
  Textowen.com (claps)
13. OSOwen Smith
  Textowen.com. I'll send you some never before seen standup of mine. If you, if you, if you fuck with it, then we see what happens. And I'll check back with you a little bit later. (laughs)
14. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, there we go.
15. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah, you go to that? You do that?
16. JRJoe Rogan
  (clears throat) You're doing, uh, the improv with me Wednesday, right?
17. OSOwen Smith
  I am.
18. JRJoe Rogan
  The late show.
19. OSOwen Smith
  I am.
20. JRJoe Rogan
  This Wednesday.
21. OSOwen Smith
  The late show.
22. JRJoe Rogan
  Beautiful.
23. OSOwen Smith
  But, uh, yeah, come hit me with that. I'll text you back.
24. JRJoe Rogan
  Beautiful.
25. OSOwen Smith
  And then after this podcast, see how many people, whatever, and I'm gonna send you some never before seen standup. If you haven't seen me, you're not familiar with me, if... And, um...
26. JRJoe Rogan
  Dude, it's gonna break your phone.
27. OSOwen Smith
  Hey, man.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
29. OSOwen Smith
  I- I- that's, that's my prayer.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
35:40 – 41:08
‘Notebooks’: a show idea to reveal the craft—and why YouTube beats executives
1. OSOwen Smith
  Like, "Why is he..." You don't understand, man. I'm so afraid of, uh... I'm not afraid of no, I just gotta get the first gut punch and then I'll keep going. You understand what I'm saying?
2. JRJoe Rogan
  What do you mean?
3. OSOwen Smith
  Like, something weird happened, man. W- I mean, my younger self, everything people are doing on Instagram, I did when I was 18, 19, 20, 21.
4. JRJoe Rogan
  Right.
5. OSOwen Smith
  Then you get a little bit older, you're like, "I don't w- wanna... What's this take? What's going on?" But when I, when I... When this idea-
6. JRJoe Rogan
  That's how I feel about TikTok.
7. OSOwen Smith
  Yes. See, there you go.
8. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
9. OSOwen Smith
  So when this idea came to me, I thought... I can't think of the... I think his name is Chase Jarvis. I was looking at Chase Jarvis. I, I had never heard of this guy, but I used to watch his, his interviews, and he was always sponsored by, you know, something very cool. He's a photographer. And, uh, he had his own show. He shot it, like, in, in his home, and he would only average, like, 50,000 views. I'm like, "How is this guy doing this?" But I thought Notebooks could be something like that, that would speak to comedy fans. But my whole intention was to... 'Cause I felt like stand-up was being, like, homogenized.
10. JRJoe Rogan
  Mmm.
11. OSOwen Smith
  Like... Because when you would just do some of these shows, the set was built and you would just stand there and perform, but it was no way of an audience member to go, "I wanna follow this guy."
12. JRJoe Rogan
  Right.
13. OSOwen Smith
  "I wanna come see, see this woman or this guy live."
14. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
15. OSOwen Smith
  So I thought Notebooks... Uh, the show we're talking about is called Notebooks, and it's basically-... every comic, the one thing comics never throw away is their old notebooks. So I would sit, I sat down with Joe, I sat down with some other comics, they were writing-
16. JRJoe Rogan
  I couldn't believe I found those.
17. OSOwen Smith
  Wasn't it fun, man? And you start going through it.
18. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, my God.
19. OSOwen Smith
  And you, I was wa- You gotta see it. You watch Joe go back to where he was when he was, like, performing it. I could see it on your face. I could see you've, like, remembered, like, where you wrote this stuff, where you came up with it. And it's just, I don't know, it just shows that this isn't... Like, we make it look easy, but it's, like, y- it shows the journey. It's also, like, a way of, like, appreciating. Like, 'cause sometimes we're hard on ourselves. It's like, "Damn, man, I..." You know what I mean? Like, and it's funny stories where you're like, "I thought this bit was gonna make me." (laughs)
20. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
21. OSOwen Smith
  "This was gonna shut it down. This was my bring the pain," you know?
22. JRJoe Rogan
  Right.
23. OSOwen Smith
  And then we had to-
24. JRJoe Rogan
  "This is my break in day." (laughs)
25. OSOwen Smith
  Right, right, right. I mean, i- it's just... An- and because-
26. JRJoe Rogan
  Right.
27. OSOwen Smith
  'Cause I can listen to a comedian and tell how long they've been doing it.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
29. OSOwen Smith
  You know? And I wanted to... I got to this place where I don't believe anybody sucks, I just believe they haven't found it yet.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
41:08 – 45:47
Comedy Central half-hour mirage: the Carlin night, a broken promise, and self-funding
1. OSOwen Smith
  No, you know, no shade on that, but it's like n- very few people were popping off that. And so much so, people thought I had one of those. Like... Did I tell you, did I ever tell you my, uh, my, my Comedy Central story?
2. JRJoe Rogan
  No.
3. OSOwen Smith
  Um, so, okay. (laughs) So I'm gonna name-check some people on here, but I literally, I, I, a- but I'm not doing it for, uh... I- i- it's all good. Like, I learned a lot from this experience. So, George Carlin was performing at Hermosa Beach Comedy and Magic Club. I go down to watch George Carlin perform, and this was, this would be his last special. At the time, uh, Kimber Rickenbaugh, who did, was Rick Mill Productions, she comes over to me and she goes, "Why don't we have a half hour on you?" And I go, "I don't know." She gives me her card and she says, "Give me 21 minutes and, uh, we'll, we'll, we'll, you know, we'll make it happen." Or, or, or she alluded to that it would happen. And so I'm standing next to the guy who books, uh, Hermosa Beach and I go, "Yo, can I get 21 minutes?" He's like, "No way." (laughs)
4. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
5. OSOwen Smith
  I can, I can just give you seven, eight minutes. So I, so I'd had to do, like, three seven minutes and piece it together. I went to the Improv. "Can I get 21 minutes?" I went to The Laugh Factory. "Can I get 21 minutes? I got g- I got this card..." No one would give me 21 minutes. And so I had to go out of town. I think I went to Chicago or somewhere, taped it, got it back. At the time, I'm writing on Everybody Hates Chris. Um, um, uh, um, Dave Becky and Michael Rotenberg ma- well, managed Chris Rock at the time. And they would c- and they were also producers on the show, so they would come down once a month and sit in the video village and just, you know, y- you know. And so I was politicking. I go, "Man, if I can get Dave Becky to contact Kimber Rickenbaugh, maybe I can get with 3 Arts," 'cause I had no manager and 3 Arts-
6. JRJoe Rogan
  Right.
7. OSOwen Smith
  ... sexy, you know, management, uh, name. And so, um...... Ali, Leroy, the showrunner, was also managed by 3 Arts, so he was kind enough to, he was just like, he just said, like, just to David, "Yo, man. Listen to this motherfucker." And then just kept, like-
8. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
9. OSOwen Smith
  (laughs) ... shooting. So I was like, "Uh, Dave, Mr. Becky? Uh, what's up, man? Uh, uh, uh, Kimbera Rickonbaugh gave me the card, said if I can give her 21 minutes, you know, it's, it's probable I'll get a half-hour special. I was wondering if I could do that through you?" And, uh, he goes, "Say no more. I rep Kimber Rickonbaugh. Done."
10. JRJoe Rogan
  Wow.
11. OSOwen Smith
  So, uh, at that time, I was, I booked a lot of colleges. So I'm, I am on cloud nine, I go, "Yo, I'm about to get a half-hour special. Woo-hoo!" Uh, I had a, I did a c- I had a gig for a college that night. So I catch the red eye to Iowa, right? Ames, Iowa. I'm performing in Ames, Iowa.
12. JRJoe Rogan
  Yikes.
13. OSOwen Smith
  Get to the hotel room the next morning, phone call on my cell phone, it's Dave Becky. I'm corny, I go, "Yep, this, this is gonna be the start of us doing this a lot." You know, I'm all students-
14. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
15. OSOwen Smith
  (laughs) He go ... He just cut that shit off. "Yeah, Owen, uh, talked to Kimber and, uh, she says she'd never heard of you." It was just it. And I was like, "What? I thought," I was like, "You hazing me, right?" Just, just d- you know. "Nope. Sorry, man. Good luck, man. All right. Talk to you." Boop, hung up. And I was like, "What?" And it never dawned on me to call Kimber (laughs) and be like, "Hey." Like, I was so floored by that.
16. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, no.
17. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah, it was like a gut punch. And then check this out. I show up at the college, I wa- I, I didn't have a college gig. The, the contract wasn't finalized. So I flew to Iowa-
18. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh.
19. OSOwen Smith
  ... for nothing, lost money for rental car, hotel, da, da, da. Had to drag my dumb self back to LA.
20. JRJoe Rogan
  (sighs)
21. OSOwen Smith
  No special on the ri- ... And again, I didn't even-
22. JRJoe Rogan
  You never contacted her?
23. OSOwen Smith
  I didn't even know, like ... And that, and that, and that's why I said I couldn't say her name because I never did that part, right? So, like, maybe I could've called them and, "Hey, da, da, da." She'd been like, "Oh my God, so sorry." I didn't even think that. I went into ... I was having, like, a pity party on the set of Everybody Hates Chris. Ernest Thomas tells me, "Man, don't wait on Hollywood to give you permission to be great." And that's why I shot my first special. I took all my college money, shot, did all that instead (laughs) of just calling this woman like, "Hey, uh, something, eh, weird." And so that's how I ended up, like, shooting the, the first special anonymous.
24. JRJoe Rogan
  That is so crazy-
25. OSOwen Smith
  Ain't that crazy?
26. JRJoe Rogan
  ... that she said she didn't even know you.
27. OSOwen Smith
  She says she never, never heard of him.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  But meanwhile, you had her card.
29. OSOwen Smith
  Had it and didn't use it. That's why it's like-
30. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh.
45:47 – 49:26
Comics helping comics: Ian Edwards stories and the economics of being ‘vegan tired’
1. JRJoe Rogan
  And Ian Edwards and I, we started out together, man.
2. OSOwen Smith
  Oh, wow.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  I've known Ian for 20, 27, 28 years. I've known him forever.
4. OSOwen Smith
  Wow.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  Dude, forever. Ian and I used to do Boston Comedy in New York City in the Village.
6. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah. Yeah. I remember that dreadlock Ian.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  Back in the day. Dreadlock Ian.
8. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah, I remember when I-
9. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
10. OSOwen Smith
  I remember I'd seen him on Def Jam.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  Before he went vegan.
12. OSOwen Smith
  When he used to yell. Yeah, before he went vegan, he used to yell.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  He calmed down when he went vegan.
14. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah. "AT&T." (laughs)
15. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs) Angry Ian.
16. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  Angry Ian.
18. OSOwen Smith
  Bum-ba-sud, bum-ba-clut, bum.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
20. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah. He get ... And, um, I remember I saw him and he was the coolest to me. Uh, I was like, "Yo, man, you, you a comedian? I'm a comedian." He was like, "Oh, c- uh, c- what you doing now?" "Nothing." "Come, come with me." And he took me to, like, a general meeting that he had (laughs) and then we-
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
22. OSOwen Smith
  ... and then we went to two sets. And I never forget, I never forget, he per- we performed, he performed in, like, a white room and it was crushing. And I said to him, "Hey, man. That was amazing. Hey, yeah, that was great." He goes, "I didn't trust them." They were-
23. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
24. OSOwen Smith
  ... laughing way too ... I don't trust that." You know? But-
25. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs) Laughing too hard.
26. OSOwen Smith
  (laughs) Like, I never ... Yo, I never heard that before.
27. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
28. OSOwen Smith
  I never heard that, but I was like, "What?"
29. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
30. OSOwen Smith
  But that was the goal.
49:26 – 56:21
Learning standup in real time: Chappelle booed, Tony Woods’ mastery, Donnell’s command
1. OSOwen Smith
  He's so funny, man. And so, yeah. So I- I- well, I, I grew up in, in, in Prince George's County, Maryland, right? And a lot of comedians come from there. Um, Chappelle. I have a Chappelle- I have a great Chappelle story 'cause we're the same age. And so when I was 19 and I just started, Greenbelt Comedy Connection. What I loved about Chappelle, I'm, I'm bringing this up because it's Mark Twain, uh, Awards, he gave a shout-out to a guy named Tony Woods.
2. GUGuest
  Tony Woods.
3. OSOwen Smith
  So Tony Woods is also from the DC area. And so at 19, I'm in this comedy club, Greenbelt Comedy, it's a Black room. Chappelle is on stage and he's getting booed. And his dismount off getting booed is something I've never seen before in my life. It was fantastic. He's like, "Fuck y'all, I'ma be famous."
4. GUGuest
  (laughs)
5. OSOwen Smith
  "I'ma be famous." Like he just kept saying that and then just walked off. And when he walked off, I was like, I was like, "Oh my God, they booed him?" Like, in my head, I'm like, "If they booed him, I don't stand a chance in comedy because w- like what just happened?" But when he walked by, nobody wanted to touch them 'cause he had that s- that, that, that-
6. GUGuest
  (laughs)
7. OSOwen Smith
  ... bomb on him. So even I, I was like, "Goddamn."
8. GUGuest
  (laughs)
9. OSOwen Smith
  "Hey, hey, man." And he, and he's (laughs) , he, he, he had, he had-
10. GUGuest
  That's so true.
11. OSOwen Smith
  ... that sweet bomb on him.
12. GUGuest
  That bomb.
13. OSOwen Smith
  Yes.
14. GUGuest
  Ugh.
15. OSOwen Smith
  And he sits down in, in the, in the booth right here and I, I just can't stop looking at him 'cause I'm watching... You know how they say the stages of grief? Like, I'm watching the stages of... Um, and I keep thinking, "Why doesn't he leave?" And he's sitting there and Tony Woods goes on stage next. And Tony Woods is like, "Wow, man. Goddamn." Like, just kind of a similar cadence. And Tony just destroys, got a standing ovation, like night and day. And I'm just 19, just new, like absorbing this.
16. GUGuest
  Mmm.
17. OSOwen Smith
  And I go, "What the fuck just happened?" Tony walks off stage and as a comic, I'm just kind of like eavesdropping. Like, I think I'm 5'7", but I'm fucking 6'5", but I'm just trying to, like, look at what they gonna do next. And they get up together and they walk out. I kind of just follow them out thinking, "I don't know what's gonna happen or anything, but hey, kid, you wanna hang with us? I don't know."
18. GUGuest
  (laughs)
19. OSOwen Smith
  They get in the same car and, and it's like, I think it was a hatchback, I'm not sure. And Tony drives off. I'm like, "Whoa, they came together." And I... That's, that was all I knew of that-
20. GUGuest
  Mmm.
21. OSOwen Smith
  ... of that relationship. And so, and I, and I, I knew that Tony had been doing it a lot longer and I knew that Dave... It's kind of like how when Kobe came into the league and was talking like Mike, and then Kobe f- leaned into who Kobe was.
22. GUGuest
  Became who he is, yeah.
23. OSOwen Smith
  Yes. Speak- you know, I speak Italian.
24. GUGuest
  Mm-hmm.
25. OSOwen Smith
  I'm speaking Italian. I speak like this. These are the things that are important to me. And so you watched Dave do that separate from Tony. But what I love about what Dave did, and this is why he's great, is he had... He recognized Tony in his greatest, like, comedic moment. Like, it's the most honest thing you can do, you know what I mean?
26. GUGuest
  Right.
27. OSOwen Smith
  Like, most people would be like, "I did this all me." But he was like, "You..." A- a- and what he said about Tony could not have been truer. You know what I mean? And so it just, like, touched my heart 'cause I was, I was there at the epicenter-
28. GUGuest
  Right.
29. OSOwen Smith
  ... when I was watching Dave s- figure it out. And it, it was probably like... And it, and it, and it was like... And, and the material he was doing, it just didn't connect with... It was a blue collar, um, black crowd and he- I think he was doing, like, the superhero stuff, like, "Man, uh, you know, Wonder Woman's magic lasso? Nah, I don't wanna hear that magic lasso shit."
30. GUGuest
  (laughs)
56:21 – 1:12:26
How Owen writes: newspapers, ‘reader’s block,’ playing on stage, and risky race bits
1. JRJoe Rogan
  How do you write? Do you sit in front of a computer and write? Do you write in front of a notebook?
2. OSOwen Smith
  That's a great question. Um-
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Or do you just have good ideas, and you just...
4. OSOwen Smith
  Good idea... So what I do... You know what I started doing? And I'm, I'ma do a podcast, too. It's gonna be called In Context With Owen Smith. 'Cause what I started doing is I started reading the newspaper more. And if I, whenever I read the newspaper, my brain fucking explodes with a whole bunch of just ideas.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  Newspaper?
6. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah. A fucking newspaper.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  Why, why newspaper?
8. OSOwen Smith
  I like, I like hold-
9. JRJoe Rogan
  The physical? Mm-hmm.
10. OSOwen Smith
  I like holding it. But now, uh, but now I just, I'm getting myself to doing online stuff, just because it's, it's just more practical. 'Cause every time I go to get the paper, like, it's not... It, it won't-
11. JRJoe Rogan
  I always feel so funny when I'm holding a newspaper now.
12. OSOwen Smith
  I know. (laughs)
13. JRJoe Rogan
  Like, "What is this?"
14. OSOwen Smith
  I know. What are you, Captain America or som-
15. JRJoe Rogan
  Do you still do this shit? (laughs)
16. OSOwen Smith
  (laughs) Right? What, are you frozen in the '50s?
17. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
18. OSOwen Smith
  What are you doing? Yeah, it's... But I, I, I like... Because y- you can see the words, and you can see, like, i- they use s- specific word choice, and my brain just starts going, "Damn, that's fun." But my act isn't that, right? My act is more personal. But just... Chris Rock told me something a long time ago. He said, "I don't suffer from..." Um, what is it when you, when you can't think of anything? Um...
19. JRJoe Rogan
  Writer's block?
20. OSOwen Smith
  Yeah. "I don't suffer from writer's block. I suffer from reader's block."
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh.
22. OSOwen Smith
  I was like, "Oh, shit." And he re- he... And, and D.L. Hughley told me a long time ago, "If you read the newspaper every day, that's equivalent to having a master's." You know? And I was like-
23. JRJoe Rogan
  Uh, no, it's not.
24. OSOwen Smith
  Well, that's GED logic, man. He-
25. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs) No, you c-
26. OSOwen Smith
  But I, but I was like, but I was like, "Yo."
27. JRJoe Rogan
  You have to write papers. (laughs)
28. OSOwen Smith
  You have to... (laughs)
29. JRJoe Rogan
  You have to, like, do serious research and take exams.
30. OSOwen Smith
  Listen, when he said it to me, that, I was like-

Episode duration: 2:33:57

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Yoga with Russell Simmons: celebrity classes, breathing, and “voluntary difficulty”

Raw vs. polished comedy—and Owen’s Def Jam baptism by fire

Celebrities in yoga class: Usher’s work ethic and the stigma of stretching

Hot Bikram humiliation, ego bruises, and why people actually pass out

Gym culture stories: dead body at Bally’s and the ‘membership trap’ business model

Basketball proximity: rebounding for Magic and getting cooked by Grant Hill

Greatness, obsession, and the Jordan vs. LeBron framing (family, motivation, variables)

Heavyweight chess: Tyson Fury vs. Deontay Wilder tactical breakdown

Owen’s audience-building pitch: textowen.com, specials, and TV’s collapse for comics

‘Notebooks’: a show idea to reveal the craft—and why YouTube beats executives

Comedy Central half-hour mirage: the Carlin night, a broken promise, and self-funding

Comics helping comics: Ian Edwards stories and the economics of being ‘vegan tired’

Learning standup in real time: Chappelle booed, Tony Woods’ mastery, Donnell’s command

How Owen writes: newspapers, ‘reader’s block,’ playing on stage, and risky race bits

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