Joe Rogan Experience #1440 - Fortune Feimster

1. 0:00 – 15:00

   Three, two, one. Fortune.…

   1. JRJoe Rogan0:00

      Three, two, one. Fortune. What's up?

   2. FFFortune Feimster0:03

      Jo.

   3. JRJoe Rogan0:04

      Good to see you. What's happening?

   4. FFFortune Feimster0:05

      You too. This is exciting.

   5. JRJoe Rogan0:06

      It's exciting for me too.

   6. FFFortune Feimster0:08

      Aww.

   7. JRJoe Rogan0:08

      Aww.

   8. FFFortune Feimster0:08

      Our first date.

   9. JRJoe Rogan0:10

      Do you have a special coming out or something going on?

   10. FFFortune Feimster0:12

       I- it just came out.

   11. JRJoe Rogan0:13

       (gasps)

   12. FFFortune Feimster0:13

       Like, a month ago.

   13. JRJoe Rogan0:15

       Oh, it's out already?

   14. FFFortune Feimster0:15

       Yeah.

   15. JRJoe Rogan0:16

       I didn't even know.

   16. FFFortune Feimster0:16

       Well, there's a lot of specials coming out right now.

   17. JRJoe Rogan0:18

       Goddamn, is this the craziest time ever for specials?

   18. FFFortune Feimster0:20

       Yeah. It's like one after another after another.

   19. JRJoe Rogan0:23

       It really is. Like, I can't remember ever in the history of comedy there's been this many specials released.

   20. FFFortune Feimster0:28

       No. And like, just killers every week.

   21. JRJoe Rogan0:31

       Yeah. Speaking of special, pull up the, um, the video of Tom Segura's-

   22. FFFortune Feimster0:35

       (laughs)

   23. JRJoe Rogan0:36

       ... new special. There's a... Uh, it's on... "Netflix is a joke," on, uh, Instagram. Has a copy of it.

   24. FFFortune Feimster0:43

       Oh, 'cause he's doing English and Spanish, right?

   25. JRJoe Rogan0:45

       Yeah. Uh, this one's just English.

   26. FFFortune Feimster0:47

       Oh, okay.

   27. JRJoe Rogan0:47

       And he's gonna do one in Spanish. You gotta... Yeah, people don't know that Tom Segura is fluent in Espanol.

   28. FFFortune Feimster0:53

       Yeah. He had his mom on his podcast.

   29. JRJoe Rogan0:55

       Yeah.

   30. FFFortune Feimster0:55

       And that was cool.
2. 15:00 – 30:00

   And, uh, I went…

   1. JRJoe Rogan15:00

   2. FFFortune Feimster15:00

      And, uh, I went to, uh, randomly Luke Bryan's house and shot guns for the first time. It was-

   3. JRJoe Rogan15:07

      He's buddies with my f- my buddy Cam Hanes.

   4. FFFortune Feimster15:09

      Yeah.

   5. JRJoe Rogan15:10

      They're bud- they're real close. I've never met him, though.

   6. FFFortune Feimster15:11

      He's a cool dude. I went-

   7. JRJoe Rogan15:12

      I heard he's the best.

   8. FFFortune Feimster15:13

      ... I went to, like, a charity event they had at their house, and it's so nice. But he had skeet shooting. I didn't get to do that, uh, but then they had some, like, rifle shooting, and-

   9. JRJoe Rogan15:23

      That's the way to live.

   10. FFFortune Feimster15:24

       ... and then the long, um...

   11. JRJoe Rogan15:26

       Rifle?

   12. FFFortune Feimster15:27

       Yeah. (laughs)

   13. JRJoe Rogan15:28

       (laughs) The long thing, the-

   14. FFFortune Feimster15:31

       You know, the long thingy.

   15. JRJoe Rogan15:32

       ... the, the, the barrel part.

   16. FFFortune Feimster15:33

       Here's what's crazy, though. My partner, uh, she acted like, "Oh, what's this? It's a rifle? Hmm. How do you use one of these?" And then, there's a, a five target. She goes, pow, pow, pow, pow.

   17. JRJoe Rogan15:46

       Whoa.

   18. FFFortune Feimster15:46

       Hits every single one of them, and I was like, "What?"

   19. JRJoe Rogan15:50

       She's sandbagging. She's lying to you.

   20. FFFortune Feimster15:51

       She's, she's lying to me.

   21. JRJoe Rogan15:52

       Yeah, that bitch has been practicing. While you're at work, she's out there shooting.

   22. FFFortune Feimster15:56

       So if you, (laughs) if you see me on Dateline-

   23. JRJoe Rogan15:57

       Uh-oh.

   24. FFFortune Feimster15:58

       ... you- (laughs)

   25. JRJoe Rogan15:59

       I'll know.

   26. FFFortune Feimster15:59

       ... you heard it here first. (laughs)

   27. JRJoe Rogan16:01

       I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll let everybody know.

   28. FFFortune Feimster16:02

       Yeah, thank you.

   29. JRJoe Rogan16:03

       That, that bitch is sandbagging.

   30. FFFortune Feimster16:04

       Man.
3. 30:00 – 45:00

   Dang. …

   1. JRJoe Rogan30:00

      was underway, he was telling me that he was working 16 hours a day.

   2. FFFortune Feimster30:02

      Dang.

   3. JRJoe Rogan30:03

      Yeah, he was in, in the, the factory 16 hours a day. Maybe he gives himself a little bit of a break-

   4. FFFortune Feimster30:08

      Yeah.

   5. JRJoe Rogan30:08

      ... and then he goes on tweet storms. (laughs)

   6. FFFortune Feimster30:09

      Yeah. (laughs) He's like, "I'm gonna go to the bathroom." (laughs) Tweet tweet.

   7. JRJoe Rogan30:12

      But that guy's ... His tweets have cost him millions of dollars.

   8. FFFortune Feimster30:15

      I know.

   9. JRJoe Rogan30:15

      And he's still tweeting.

   10. FFFortune Feimster30:15

       He doesn't care.

   11. JRJoe Rogan30:16

       He doesn't give a fuck.

   12. FFFortune Feimster30:17

       But that's how much money ... When s- when you have a lot of money, you're just like, "Whatever." (laughs)

   13. JRJoe Rogan30:21

       Yeah, "I'm just tweeting, bitch."

   14. FFFortune Feimster30:22

       Yeah.

   15. JRJoe Rogan30:22

       "What you gonna do?"

   16. FFFortune Feimster30:24

       (laughs)

   17. JRJoe Rogan30:24

       Yeah, when the, uh, um ... When he wrote, "Tesla stock selling private at 4/20," or "secured at 4/20"-

   18. JVJamie Vernon30:30

       Mm-hmm.

   19. JRJoe Rogan30:30

       ... like, as a joke.

   20. FFFortune Feimster30:32

       Uh-huh.

   21. JRJoe Rogan30:32

       He's got, like, weird 4/20 jokes, but he doesn't even smoke weed. Like, when he smoked weed-

   22. FFFortune Feimster30:36

       He smoked one here.

   23. JRJoe Rogan30:36

       ... on my podcast-

   24. FFFortune Feimster30:37

       Yeah.

   25. JRJoe Rogan30:37

       ... he barely inhaled.

   26. FFFortune Feimster30:38

       Oh, really?

   27. JRJoe Rogan30:39

       Yeah, I don't think he ... I don't think he really smokes weed, but he does-

   28. FFFortune Feimster30:41

       Yeah.

   29. JRJoe Rogan30:41

       He makes a lot of 4/20 jokes.

   30. FFFortune Feimster30:42

       (laughs)
4. 45:00 – 1:00:00

   Well, why don't they…

   1. FFFortune Feimster45:00

      need to r- need to embrace that people are saying "fucking".

   2. JRJoe Rogan45:02

      Well, why don't they have like a way you can click on it and say, "Learn"?

   3. FFFortune Feimster45:06

      Yeah.

   4. JRJoe Rogan45:06

      Like, maybe old people don't want you suggesting "fucking".

   5. FFFortune Feimster45:10

      Right.

   6. JRJoe Rogan45:10

      But, or, you know, hardcore Christians or something like that.

   7. FFFortune Feimster45:13

      (laughs)

   8. JRJoe Rogan45:13

      But if you're a person who says "fuck" all the time-

   9. FFFortune Feimster45:15

      You can do the, the preference. (laughs)

   10. JRJoe Rogan45:16

       ... it sh- y- you should be able to autocorrect to "fuck".

   11. FFFortune Feimster45:18

       Yeah.

   12. JRJoe Rogan45:18

       Like, it says that.

   13. FFFortune Feimster45:19

       Once you've used it enough-

   14. JRJoe Rogan45:20

       Yeah.

   15. FFFortune Feimster45:20

       ... it should be like, "All right, this is a standard word for their..."

   16. JRJoe Rogan45:23

       I wonder if Android does it the same way?

   17. FFFortune Feimster45:25

       I don't know.

   18. JRJoe Rogan45:26

       I wonder if Android corrects like that too?

   19. FFFortune Feimster45:29

       My partner has a Android.

   20. JRJoe Rogan45:30

       Yeah?

   21. FFFortune Feimster45:30

       But I've never asked. (laughs)

   22. JRJoe Rogan45:32

       Lesbians are so funny with "partner". Why don't you just say, "My girl"?

   23. FFFortune Feimster45:35

       "My girl."

   24. JRJoe Rogan45:36

       "My woman."

   25. FFFortune Feimster45:36

       I don't know.

   26. JRJoe Rogan45:37

       Why, why is it part- partner's always just like-

   27. FFFortune Feimster45:38

       Partner seems-

   28. JRJoe Rogan45:39

       ... "Are you guys in business? Like, what are you doing?"

   29. FFFortune Feimster45:40

       ... it seems respectful.

   30. JRJoe Rogan45:41

       Is that what it is?
5. 1:00:00 – 1:02:27

   Mm-hmm. …

   1. JRJoe Rogan1:00:00

      food.

   2. FFFortune Feimster1:00:00

      Mm-hmm.

   3. JRJoe Rogan1:00:00

      There's ... One of my favorite restaurants ever is in Montreal. It's called Joe Bife.

   4. FFFortune Feimster1:00:03

      I've heard. I've never, I've, I've never been, but-

   5. JRJoe Rogan1:00:06

      Oh, it's amazing.

   6. FFFortune Feimster1:00:06

      ... all the comics love that place.

   7. JRJoe Rogan1:00:07

      Goddam, it's good, and the guys, uh, Fred and David, have been in here before.

   8. FFFortune Feimster1:00:11

      Mm-hmm.

   9. JRJoe Rogan1:00:11

      They've been on the podcast before. They're great. I was introduced to them by Bourdain.

   10. FFFortune Feimster1:00:16

       It's a good steakhouse, right?

   11. JRJoe Rogan1:00:17

       They have everything.

   12. FFFortune Feimster1:00:18

       Okay.

   13. JRJoe Rogan1:00:18

       It's a French restaurant.

   14. FFFortune Feimster1:00:20

       Oh, gotcha.

   15. JRJoe Rogan1:00:20

       And it's spectacular food.

   16. FFFortune Feimster1:00:21

       Yeah.

   17. JRJoe Rogan1:00:22

       Yeah. It's the first time I ever ate horse.

   18. FFFortune Feimster1:00:23

       Oof. I had horse in Switzerland by accident.

   19. JRJoe Rogan1:00:27

       By accident?

   20. FFFortune Feimster1:00:27

       It was-

   21. JRJoe Rogan1:00:28

       It was bovine.

   22. FFFortune Feimster1:00:28

       ... gnarly. (laughs) I didn't-

   23. JRJoe Rogan1:00:30

       What'd you think it was?

   24. FFFortune Feimster1:00:30

       Again, that texture, man. It tasted-

   25. JRJoe Rogan1:00:32

       Oh.

   26. FFFortune Feimster1:00:32

       ... like a raw hamburger patty.

   27. JRJoe Rogan1:00:34

       Oh, well, it was probably tartare. It was probably horse tartare.

   28. FFFortune Feimster1:00:36

       Yeah, but I didn't order that. I ordered a hamburger.

   29. JRJoe Rogan1:00:39

       Oh.

   30. FFFortune Feimster1:00:41

       (laughs)

Episode duration: 2:50:25