Joe Rogan Experience #1450 - Brian Redban

Brian Redban is a comedian and the founder of the Deathsquad podcast network. Also look for him on “Kill Tony” available on Apple Podcasts & YouTube: @KillTony @redban

Joe RoganhostBrian RedbanguestJamie VernonguestGuest (unidentified, friend/associate on mic)guest

Mar 31, 20203h 22mWatch on YouTube ↗

EVERY SPOKEN WORD

150 min read · 30,435 words

0:01 – 1:34
Foil suits and survival blankets: turning the studio into a “spacesuit” bit
1. JRJoe Rogan
  Yee-haw! How you hanging in there, fella?
2. BRBrian Redban
  Great, man.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  I think these things are gonna annoy a lot of people.
4. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs)
5. JRJoe Rogan
  If you're listening, we're wearing aluminum foil. (laughs)
6. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs)
7. JRJoe Rogan
  We're let- we're wearing spacesuits.
8. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  God, they're so crunchy.
10. BRBrian Redban
  There's not many left for me to get. This is the-
11. JRJoe Rogan
  This is dope.
12. BRBrian Redban
  Now I'm getting into the- Yeah, the real-
13. JRJoe Rogan
  This is my favorite one.
14. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs)
15. JRJoe Rogan
  I like the orange one for some strange reason.
16. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  The white one just seems like I'm a cleanup person.
18. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs) Yeah.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  You know? Like you're doing some NASA cleanup, like there's alien bodies you're trying to get rid of. But this feels like we're about to do something special.
20. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  About ... We're protected.
22. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah. I just hope it doesn't start making us sweat and we lose like 100 pounds. Well, I mean-
23. JRJoe Rogan
  This is the same shit that's on the outside of the lunar module that, that land... You know what I mean? That cheap-looking aluminum foil.
24. BRBrian Redban
  Oh, yeah. (laughs)
25. JRJoe Rogan
  It looks like it was stuck on there with gum.
26. JVJamie Vernon
  Heat shield?
27. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, the heat shield.
28. JVJamie Vernon
  Is that what they call it, heat shield?
29. BRBrian Redban
  Mm-hmm.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  Whatever it is.
1:34 – 4:38
Who’s hurting most: hospitals, hospitality, restaurants, and layoffs
1. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. You know, um ... Look, there's people that got it rough. The people that got it rough are, number one, medical workers. Anybody, you know ... Much love to anybody that's working in hospitals right now. Doctors, nurses, everybody. Interns, everybody. Everybody. People working the desk, goddamn, you guys have it rough. You know, those are the people number one. Number two, ho- any- anybody in the hospitality industry. People serving food, uh, restaurants, bars-
2. BRBrian Redban
  Grocery store workers.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Fuck.
4. BRBrian Redban
  Jesus.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, they have it rough, but they have jobs. You know, it's rough, but they- their jobs are still open. The, the thing that drives me crazy is there's so many restaurants where these people, you know, employed 50, 60 people, and, you know, restaurants are hard. It's hard to stay open when things are great. You know, restaurants are a fucking ... Th- but the ... What is the- it's one of the number one businesses that fails. Like, the ... What is the ... See if you can find the statistic, but it's something crazy like 70% of all restaurants fail within the first year.
6. BRBrian Redban
  Mm-hmm.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  'Cause it's fu- ho- Imagine running a restaurant?
8. BRBrian Redban
  Especially, what ki- like a chicken restaurant? Like, everyone's has chicken restaurants.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  Do you remember that great restaurant that was right next to the Icehouse? We used to go there all the time.
10. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah, it's gone now.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  God, it was good.
12. BRBrian Redban
  They got foie gras there.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, it was good.
14. BRBrian Redban
  And the place that just replaced it just closed down.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  Look at this. "They have a high failure rate, but knowing why can help the prospective owners f- uh ... Around 60% of new restaurants fail within the first year, and nearly 80% shutter before their fifth anniversary." Wow, 80% in five years.
16. BRBrian Redban
  Hmm.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  So, if you get a restaurant like Dan Tana's that's been open since like the '60s or something. Like, when was ... Did you ever eat at Dan Tana's, Jamie?
18. JVJamie Vernon
  No, I've never-
19. BRBrian Redban
  Where is that?
20. JRJoe Rogan
  Have you ever eaten there? You don't know where Dan Tana's is?
21. BRBrian Redban
  No.
22. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh my God, dude. We need to do a dinner at Dan Tana's.
23. JVJamie Vernon
  Man.
24. BRBrian Redban
  Anytime.
25. JRJoe Rogan
  A post-store dinner at Dan Tana's because Dan Tana's is open, the kitchen's open till like midnight. It's phenomenal. Some of the best Italian food in all of LA.
26. BRBrian Redban
  Wow.
27. JRJoe Rogan
  And it's on Santa Monica Boulevard, like on the border of Boystown.
28. BRBrian Redban
  Wow.
29. JVJamie Vernon
  It's next to the Troubadour, right?
30. JRJoe Rogan
  Hey. Yeah, the Troubadour where I saw, uh, I saw Everlast recently and Sturgill.
4:38 – 7:52
Lockdowns, travel fear, and everyday exposure (Postmates, apartments, grocery stores)
1. JRJoe Rogan
  She got holed up in North Carolina.
2. BRBrian Redban
  Oh, gosh.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, you know, her fo- her folks are down there, so she went down there and ... She's holed up. I know so many people are holed u- um, Nick Swardson, he's holed up in, uh, Michigan, you know, or Minnesota for- rather, where he's from. You know, one of them m- words.
4. BRBrian Redban
  Right.
5. JVJamie Vernon
  South side, I think.
6. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah, my friend David, uh, from-
7. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, he's from Minnesota.
8. BRBrian Redban
  ... Kill Tony. He was stuck in, in New York-
9. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
10. BRBrian Redban
  ... and he got out like the day before they just banned like all travel out of New York.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  (sighs)
12. BRBrian Redban
  But now, no hanging out with David. (laughs)
13. JRJoe Rogan
  For a little bit.
14. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah, right?
15. JRJoe Rogan
  Give him 14 days. "Hey, man, can I take your temperature?"
16. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs)
17. JVJamie Vernon
  (laughs)
18. JRJoe Rogan
  Jamie's got somebody in his building.
19. JVJamie Vernon
  Mm-hmm. Yep, got an email yesterday. I was gonna say-
20. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
21. JVJamie Vernon
  ... they just have a ... Checkpoints, they're showing videos of in Florida blockin' people coming in from like New York.
22. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
23. JVJamie Vernon
  So many people flew down there to bail, and they brought that shit down there.
24. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, there was ... I reading an article, I think it was in the Atlantic, about people who are on the cape, like Cape Cod and Boston, and they're mad that, uh, people who own summer houses out there are going to stay in their summer house. Like, "Hey, you fuck-
25. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs)
26. JRJoe Rogan
  ... this is where we live. Don't bring your cooties over here."
27. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  But they live there too, man. They just ... They own two houses. They still own the house. You know, just if you own two hou- Like, how does that work? You know, like people want their isolation, right, 'cause they live in their town, but if somebody bought that house, this is still America. That's their fucking house.
29. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  I get it, you don't want a bunch of people coughing around you, but they don't want a bunch of people coughing around them either, which is why they went to the cape in the first place.
7:52 – 11:03
Origin debates to ecology: bats, unintended consequences, and invasive species
1. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm. Yeah, and it's also, um, like, whose fault is it? Is it anybody's fault? It seems like no one has any idea what's going on. And to blame anybody... Definitely bad decisions were made.
2. BRBrian Redban
  Whoever ate that first bat, Ozzie, uh, who- whoever did it.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  I think they've eaten bats for a long time, man.
4. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs)
5. JRJoe Rogan
  They're just like the bee gees down there, trying to stay alive.
6. JVJamie Vernon
  I was reading an article about, they said the lady who was patient zero, that got it first, sh- she thinks she got it from being in a, uh, stall next to it, somehow. She didn't say she ate, like, a bat. But like-
7. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh.
8. JVJamie Vernon
  ... that she was in that market, and like, she was selling something else in there, and like, being near it.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, man. She was breathing bat air all day.
10. JVJamie Vernon
  Like, 20 other people got it too, around her or something.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  Ugh.
12. JVJamie Vernon
  That's what, their explanation I read yesterday was.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  Gross.
14. JVJamie Vernon
  Don't know how true that was, but that's what I was...
15. BRBrian Redban
  Should we ex- like, is there any reason for a bat to be ali- a, a species still?
16. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
17. BRBrian Redban
  Like, can't we just wipe out bats?
18. JRJoe Rogan
  Well, they were talking about doing that with mosquitoes. But when you play God with an ecosystem, you don't know what the unintended consequences are. There's some good examples of that. Like, you can't just do that. Like, (coughs) even bringing a new species to a place where there's, you know, it seems like the, the species is gonna be fine, has disastrous results most of the time. If it does, if it's not a part of the system, like, s- it's weird, man. Like, systems, they, they're, they exist in nature, and there's like, all these strengths and weaknesses that balance each other out. These animals that eat other animals, and those animals, animals eat certain plants, and those certain plants, and they shit those plants out, it helps fertilize other plants, and they got it down. They know what they're doing. And you throw a buffalo into that, and everybody's like, " (imitates buffalo noises) "
19. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs)
20. JRJoe Rogan
  And e- everything gets fucked up. I mean, that's, that's what happened to Australia. You know, Australia and New Zealand are both crazy examples of that. Aus- Australia in particular, 'cause so many people live there. I mean, uh, as many, almost as many people as live in LA, live in Australia, which doesn't seem like a lot. You know?
21. BRBrian Redban
  Isn't Australia like, they're not letting anyone leave?
22. JRJoe Rogan
  Da- yeah, I think they got it locked down.
23. BRBrian Redban
  I don't know.
24. JRJoe Rogan
  Is that true?
25. BRBrian Redban
  I thought I read that they were locked down.
26. JRJoe Rogan
  They probably should.
27. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  But anyway, Australia has wild cats, like house cats, that they put out to kill some other thing, that they put out to, to, to like, to live over there. They did a bunch of stupid shit like that. Like, they have all these animals just roaming around they have to kill im. They have to chase 'em down and kill 'em, all these deer, and all these different, uh, stags, and these different animals. They say they, sometimes they have to do it with helicopters. They fly over and just gun 'em down 'cause they don't have any predators. So these things just g- get to these preposterous proportions. You know?
29. BRBrian Redban
  Look at Japanese beetles. You know, they came from Japan and they s- they fuck up our country, wh- every seven years, they come in town and just... Do you guys ever have beetles in LA? I don't know, like, where you have to get those beetle bags.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, you get the bark beetles? Well, they get those bark beetles that fucked up Big Bear.
11:03 – 14:57
Kudzu as a metaphor: how invasive growth mirrors viral spread
1. JRJoe Rogan
  Some plants got in someone's boot. The seeds were in the cracks of someone's boot and wound up in the forest, and this new invasive species crops up and chokes out all the native plants. It happens all the time. What's that stuff that's in the South we talked about one time? It covers everything. Some crazy growth that, uh, I believe it's from Asia originally, and it made it down... Someone was explaining it to me, and I remember I was blown away 'cause I'd never, never heard about it.
2. BRBrian Redban
  It's like a mold, like an, uh...
3. JRJoe Rogan
  No, it's like a v- like a vine that covers everything. It's like trees that cover other trees. They choke out all the life. They take away all the oxygen and sun.
4. BRBrian Redban
  I don't know. Not ivory.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  O- oxygen. Trees don't even breathe oxygen. What am I talking about?
6. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs) Kud- kudzu.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, that's the stuff. Pull up a picture of that shit. Takes over a whole forest.
8. BRBrian Redban
  Jesus.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, it's weird. I'd never even heard about it until like three or four years ago. Someone on the podcast brought it up and I was like, "What?"
10. BRBrian Redban
  I wonder if I've seen it before.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  What is this? Look at that. Dude. That's just, that stuff just takes over.
12. BRBrian Redban
  Oh, so it's growing over trees.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  Grows over everything.
14. BRBrian Redban
  Wow. That's like, looks like ghosts.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  It, yeah, it's like, it's like an alien thing that decides it's gonna like, overcome everything in its environment and completely take over other trees.
16. BRBrian Redban
  At least it looks okay.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  It looks dope.
18. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs)
19. JRJoe Rogan
  It looks dope. But it's cr- it's weird, dude. It's w-... Things like that are weird. 'Cause if that was an animal doing that to other animals, we'd be freaked out. If we, like, let these rats loose and the rats were, like, chasing down, you know, people's cows and killing all these people's cows, we'd be like, "What the fuck is going on?" "Oh, these rats just live around cows and consume them." But w- we, we see trees getting consumed. Like, l-... If you've never seen these photos, the stuff's sp- spelled K-U-D-Z-U. Um, and it's... That was pi-... Was that in the Mississippi? Was that... The photo was from? That last photo?
20. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah. Yeah, I think so. Yeah.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Somewhere in the South. And I don't know when this shit... See, for s-... See if you could find the history, when it was introduced. Oh, it's in Portland, Oregon too.
22. BRBrian Redban
  That name sounds like it's... It came from Asia-
23. JVJamie Vernon
  Yes.
24. BRBrian Redban
  ... like ka-duh-zoo.
25. JVJamie Vernon
  Japanese.
26. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
27. JVJamie Vernon
  Japanese. Yeah.
28. BRBrian Redban
  Goddamn you and your beetles.
29. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. When was this brought over here? With i-... That stuff is just dominating wherever it is. It's weird. It's... Uh, when... Especially when something like this is going on, like we're dealing with coronavirus and you stop and think about things that get... 1876, senten-... Centennial Exposition in Philadelphia.
30. BRBrian Redban
  Wow.
14:57 – 18:24
Contamination paranoia and DIY sanitation tech (phones, UV, water purifiers)
1. BRBrian Redban
  And it's so easy to pass, I guess. Like, uh, people were talking about how, like, if you let somebody pet your dog, like, if you're walking your dog and somebody goes, "Oh, no," and pets your dog.
2. JRJoe Rogan
  And stays on the dog.
3. BRBrian Redban
  And then it's on your dog.
4. JRJoe Rogan
  Jesus Christ.
5. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs) Or, like, these Juuls. You put your Juul down on a table. You don't even think about it.
6. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, yeah.
7. BRBrian Redban
  Then you put it in... Right in your mouth. You're looking at a table.
8. JRJoe Rogan
  You called it a dirty straw the other day. Exactly. You're just holding a dirty straw. (laughs)
9. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah. Dirty straw.
10. JRJoe Rogan
  You have that, you have that dirty straw in your pocket all the time. It's always rubbing up against your lint and-
11. BRBrian Redban
  Right.
12. JRJoe Rogan
  ... your gum, and...
13. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah. Luckily, these things are... The, the ends are replaceable, so you're kind of-
14. JRJoe Rogan
  Just throw it away every five minutes.
15. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah. (laughs)
16. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs) Just have a giant gym bag of them. (laughs)
17. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs) My girlfriend just got one of those phone cleaners where you put your phone in-
18. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, I've seen those.
19. BRBrian Redban
  ... and it has the UV light.
20. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
21. BRBrian Redban
  So now I'm putting everything in it. I'm putting Juuls, car keys.
22. JRJoe Rogan
  It's a good move. It's a good move. I had heard about those before. Um, I, I didn't know there was a... There was a thing that I found about called a SteriStick, and, uh, they use it when they, uh, go b- back country hiking and stuff, and camping, and it, it purifies water with a stick. Like, it's an electrolyte band and you stick it in-
23. BRBrian Redban
  Right.
24. JRJoe Rogan
  ... into this, uh, U-... It's UV light, and you stick it into this, uh, elec-... The... It's like a straw-looking thing.
25. BRBrian Redban
  Uh, the LifeStraw.
26. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, like a lightsaber.
27. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  Remember those kids' lightsabers? (light saber noises)
29. BRBrian Redban
  Right.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  That's what it looks like, with the clear on the outside.
18:24 – 24:18
Cures, misinformation, and media framing: chloroquine and Trump coverage
1. BRBrian Redban
  Did you see the guy that they just arrested for selling the coronavirus, uh, pill that supposedly kills the coronavirus? He reminds me of that old bodybuilding guy. What's that... Dan or whatever, that used to sell fake, uh...
2. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh.
3. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs)
4. JRJoe Rogan
  One of them back of the book guys?
5. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah. (laughs)
6. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
7. BRBrian Redban
  Uh, but if you look at this guy, he looks like he's insane.
8. JRJoe Rogan
  He's selling... Well, there was some preachers that were selling it, like Jim Baker was selling a coronavirus-
9. BRBrian Redban
  Right.
10. JRJoe Rogan
  ... virus cure.
11. BRBrian Redban
  They straight up arrested this guy, though.
12. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
13. BRBrian Redban
  He looks like a meathead.
14. JRJoe Rogan
  What... They say there's nothing... With, with the, the chloroquine there's no studies, right? There's no definitive tests, but they're still letting people try it. Is that what's going on with that?
15. BRBrian Redban
  I think so. Like, the, the couple that died took the wrong shit. They took-
16. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, they took-
17. BRBrian Redban
  ... like-
18. JRJoe Rogan
  ... poison.
19. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah, cleaner.
20. JRJoe Rogan
  They took algae c- or, um, uh, bacteria killer. It's, it's for fucking koi ponds.
21. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
22. JRJoe Rogan
  It's poison. They took poison.
23. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah, they just-
24. JRJoe Rogan
  They died from taking poison.
25. BRBrian Redban
  They misread or misunderstood or something. (laughs)
26. JRJoe Rogan
  Dude, the media today is, is kinda spooky with their hatred of Trump is getting in the way of the accuracy of some people's reporting of the news, and that's a perfect example. By resorting to clickbait and saying that they heard it from Trump, but he... That's not what he said. What he, what he's talking about is a different kind of chloroquine.
27. BRBrian Redban
  Mm-hmm.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  There's more than one different kind of it, right?
29. BRBrian Redban
  Right.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  But if they just said, real simply, that, "These people died. Please be careful. There is more than one different kind of chloroquine."
24:18 – 33:50
New York density, cost of living, and why cities amplify outbreaks
1. JRJoe Rogan
  And New York people are a unique breed.Bro, who got hit harder than them? They've already lost more than 1,000 people as of this morning.
2. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  It's, that place has got it bad, 'cause they're all stacked on top of each other. You know? It's one of the things, unfortunately, that makes New York awesome. New York, you're just immersed, you know, you're immersed in people. You know, you walk down the street in New York and there's just fucking, people are everywhere, man. They're coming at you, you're coming at them. Ah! It's wild. It's a different kind of way of living. I get it. All the people that love it, you know. My friend Jeff, he's lived there forever, since I met him. He's my manager. And, uh, he fucking loves it, loves New York, just loves it, loves knowing all the good spots.
4. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs)
5. JRJoe Rogan
  You know, loves knowing how to get around on the subway. He doesn't even need a ma- he loves it. He loves it. I go there, I'm like, "Jesus Christ." I just, I- I just go, and I go, "Wah! Woo! Now let me jump off that ride."
6. BRBrian Redban
  Yep.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  That's how I feel about New York.
8. BRBrian Redban
  Me too.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  Ah! Boof. But it's great. It's great. And I get it that you would wanna live there. I get it. If you're especially, like, creative types. But Judah Friedlander was telling us there's, it's like all bankers now. He says, he goes, he goes, "It's so fucking expensive to live in Manhattan." It's not like this, you know, this giant artist community anymore. He goes, "Everybody's sort of been pushed out to Brooklyn and, and pushed out to the other boroughs."
10. BRBrian Redban
  It's so expensive. I looked up somebody, like a celebrity accidentally put out his address the other day, and I was like, "Oh, I wanna know where he lives." You know? He lives in like a little two bedroom, uh, apartment, $3.7 million.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
12. BRBrian Redban
  And I was just like, "What?"
13. JRJoe Rogan
  That's so crazy. (laughs)
14. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs) Because like, 'cause he-
15. JRJoe Rogan
  Bro.
16. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah, he's been blogging from it, and it just looks like a basic apartment.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  40 minutes out of Nashville, 2.7, 3.7? Is that what you said? How much?
18. BRBrian Redban
  3.7.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  $3.7 million will buy you a goddamn farm.
20. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  You could have a giant ass farm with like 400 acres of land and a beautiful house with a view, maybe have a creek in your backyard. That's what you get for $3.7 million.
22. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  You're not supposed to get a fucking apartment.
24. BRBrian Redban
  No. (laughs) And a basic apartment. It's in that Chelsea district, so I- I think that's-
25. JRJoe Rogan
  Is that a good spot?
26. BRBrian Redban
  I- I guess. I don't know anything about New York.
27. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, I know, um, that one spot that was really good that everybody was trying to convince me I should move to flooded.
28. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs)
29. JRJoe Rogan
  What's that one spot down in the- in the- the base of New York? What's that one place where they all love it?
30. JVJamie Vernon
  The Financial District down there?
33:50 – 36:35
Community kindness, fear as a “reset,” and prepping for bigger disasters
1. JVJamie Vernon
  You think their business is picking up right now?
2. JRJoe Rogan
  No.
3. JVJamie Vernon
  Protecting people?
4. JRJoe Rogan
  No, people need money. People need money. They- they're not gonna spend their fucking money on some nonsense. They're... In the back of their head, they know it was nonsense. You're hearing way, way, way, way, way less people complain about nonsense right now. You know, you don't, you don't hear the, the standard outrage at stupid shit. What you're hearing now is people really concerned about people's lives. You know, and I'm, I'm hoping that this is gonna last, that this feeling of understanding that we are really vulnerable, we're all, we- we're in this together. We really are, you know? And sometimes it takes something like this to happen where you go, "Oh shit." But no, we really are. We're in this together. We just didn't realize it 'cause it was easy. It was easy to get by.
5. BRBrian Redban
  It's really cool seeing the, the neighborhood aspect of it. Like I've been... I, I don't know if you're on Nextdoor. I'd tell you're on Nextdoor. (laughs) That'd be hilarious. But, uh, Nextdoor is like, you know, like it's a Reddit thread for your neighborhood.
6. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
7. BRBrian Redban
  And just hearing people like, "Hey, does anyone have toilet paper?" And somebody's like, "Oh, I'll drop off lemons, my lemon tree." You know, and just like helping each other out. It's like... It's-
8. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
9. BRBrian Redban
  ... pretty, pretty beautiful.
10. JRJoe Rogan
  It is.
11. BRBrian Redban
  It didn't happen before this, you know.
12. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, it's very cool. It's funny you say lemons. My next door neighbor, she was handing out lemons yesterday. She had a bucket, "Free lemons."
13. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
14. JRJoe Rogan
  "Come take some lemons." Just set it out in front of the house.
15. BRBrian Redban
  Kinda like a lemon tree.
16. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, it's um... There's good parts to being scared, you realize. You know, people get cocky, man. It's one of the reasons why I like weed. One of the like... I've talked about this and people think I'm kidding, but one of the reasons why I like weed is it makes me paranoid. I like it.
17. BRBrian Redban
  Mm-hmm.
18. JRJoe Rogan
  I- I- I can get cocky. People get cocky. You get confused, you know. You can, you can start believing some pretty stupid things about just life in general if you're not humbled by a little fear sometimes. Just a little nervousness, just a little anxiety, just a little look up at sk- the sky. What would we do if an asteroid shower just came down unannounced and just completely wiped out the power grid? You wanna talk about death and disease? What we're experiencing now is... This is a fucking dry run for a real apocalyptic event. This is nothing. This is nothing in comparison to stuff that could happen. We got cocky. We didn't think it could happen 'cause nothing had happened in so long and we'd find these craters and be like, "Huh?" "Hmm." "Look, we found that spot where everybody died and, uh, you know, 200,000 years ago." "Oh look, here's a spot where the dinosaurs were killed 65 million years ago." There's all these spots where they keep finding these gigantic fucking craters.
19. JVJamie Vernon
  (laughs)
20. BRBrian Redban
  Here's where Noah's ark crashed.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, exactly.
22. JVJamie Vernon
  (laughs)
23. JRJoe Rogan
  But you have that guy.
24. BRBrian Redban
  People that are, people that are really just looking for Noah's ark, you miss the point.
36:35 – 43:07
Myths and monsters: Noah’s Ark reinterpretation and the ‘sky monster’ tornado bit
1. GMGuest (unidentified, friend/associate on mic)
  ... remember that guy from a long time ago that made the video, Noah's Ark?
2. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's right.
3. GMGuest (unidentified, friend/associate on mic)
  Uh, I wonder what happened to that guy? (laughs)
4. JRJoe Rogan
  Didn't that guy want us to go look at it?
5. GMGuest (unidentified, friend/associate on mic)
  Yeah.
6. JRJoe Rogan
  You know.
7. GMGuest (unidentified, friend/associate on mic)
  You were like, "What are you gonna show me? A big boat?" (laughs) Like... (laughs)
8. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs) I'm like, "Bro, but if you're coming to me, you already fucked up." You know, you're coming to me to, to release your Noah's Ark information? (laughs)
9. GMGuest (unidentified, friend/associate on mic)
  (laughs)
10. JRJoe Rogan
  This is... I don't think this is real, sir. But what I think the Noah's Ark story is, it... Look, you just have to th- put it through the filter of time, right? We're talking about thousands and thousands of years ago, and we're talking about people likely telling a story for hundreds, if not thousands of years before it ever gets written down. And all these different versions of it get tossed around, but the heart of the Noah's Ark story is a cataclysmic event happens, and this one guy collects a bunch of animals and he restarts civilization. That is... You could easily put that through the filter of interpretation and say, "I bet what happened was there was a small group of people that survived some sort of massive cataclysmic event, and one guy convinced someone, or they made it up, that he knew it was coming and that God had been talking to him, so that's why he was able to, to lead everybody." And then after they tell the story 3,000 different times, it gets all whacked out and, you know, God comes down and tells him, "No, you gotta build a boat." So he builds this boat and everybody laughs at him and he brings on two of each animal, you know. It's the dumbest story ever. It's a... But it's a story that clearly it's not a real story, right? 'Cause I, you know, I had that bit about if you told that to a five-year-old kid with a mental handicap, he would be like, "There's a lot of holes in that story."
11. GMGuest (unidentified, friend/associate on mic)
  (laughs)
12. JRJoe Rogan
  You ever had that bit?
13. GMGuest (unidentified, friend/associate on mic)
  Yeah, I love that bit.
14. JRJoe Rogan
  That bit was... But the, the accuracy of it's like, animals eat other animals. You can't just have two of each animal on a boat. That's ridiculous. That doesn't make any sense. That makes zero sense. Like, what are you doing? Why are you lying to me? Something else happened. But what they're trying to say is some animal survived and r- civilization restarted. They didn't know how big the world was back then. People 4,000 years ago or whatever it was when they first wrote these stories down or even had these ideas, those people had no idea how big the world was. They were in their spot. If some shit went down in your spot, you thought the world was ending. You know, could you imagine if you're living near Pompeii when that Mount Vesuvius blows and the whole fucking town gets covered in ash and everybody dies? Imagine if you're living anywhere near there. You would think that hell just broke out in, in the world. You wouldn't think, oh, in, you know, Thailand right now, they're just chilling on the beach. You wouldn't think that. You would think it's over like this for everyone everywhere. Meanwhile, on the other side of the world, in fucking New Zealand, they didn't even know it happened. They had no idea. They're just hanging out. Meanwhile, these people are dead as fuck, covered in ash. Over in New Zealand, they're just hanging out. You know? Like, that's how the world is. The world's huge and if, if some shit goes down in one part, back then you didn't know. So if you were one of the people that survived when some shit went down, you would write about it, and then people would talk and they'd tell that story and they'd pass it on to other people and they'd pass it on to other people and somewhere through these stories they figured out there's like a framework in here for telling people that shit could go down and that we have to work together and that we have to believe in a higher power and that if you believe in a higher power and you believe there's something else that's bigger and better than you, you'll do better things while you're here. You know? That's... It's so obvious. Obviously I could be wrong too, but my... That's, that's my take on it and I think we've just had this giant stretch where none of those things happened. You know? We, we've had a couple of hundred years of pretty easy life in terms of natural disasters. You know, you got your occasional hurricane. A- again, if you were there, you would think it's hell. If you were... Or the tornado hits. When we're chilling here in LA and a tornado hits Louisiana, we feel bad. You see, oh, 36 people died in a tornado, we feel bad, but you don't feel it, you know. You don't know the sky monster's coming to take your loved ones. But if you're there, that sky monster is a real thing. It's a sky monster. Just 'cause it doesn't have fangs, just 'cause it doesn't laugh at you while it's ripping your family apart and throwing fucking ba- bathtubs in the air and... You ever seen... There's one video of a, a semi, like a semi-truck spinning in the sky.
15. GMGuest (unidentified, friend/associate on mic)
  Was it Twister (laughs) in the movie Twister?
16. JRJoe Rogan
  Spinning in the sky. No!
17. GMGuest (unidentified, friend/associate on mic)
  (laughs)
18. JRJoe Rogan
  No, no, no. It was real.
19. GMGuest (unidentified, friend/associate on mic)
  (laughs)
20. JRJoe Rogan
  It was real you son of a bitch.
21. GMGuest (unidentified, friend/associate on mic)
  Really? That was real? (laughs)
22. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes. Yeah, it hit, it hit... (laughs) That's hilarious. It hit a, uh, a parking area for semi-trucks and these, uh, semi-trucks were literally getting flown around in the air.
23. GMGuest (unidentified, friend/associate on mic)
  Ah, shit.
24. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. I think-
25. GMGuest (unidentified, friend/associate on mic)
  I, um-
26. JRJoe Rogan
  ... we found this before. Dude, it might be Twister.
27. GMGuest (unidentified, friend/associate on mic)
  (laughs)
28. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
29. GMGuest (unidentified, friend/associate on mic)
  With Helen Hunt in it.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  No, no, no. There it is.
43:07 – 50:54
Flu vs COVID numbers, testing limits, and why this virus hits differently
1. JRJoe Rogan
  But if you think about it, man, this virus ... I've been saying this about all viruses, that diseases are like demons, you know? And we, we just ... If we were losing ... Like, have you seen the numbers too? This is something that, uh, my friend, Steve, who's a doctor, sent me, and this is a fucking cr- a, a series of crazy statistics. But, um, the crazy statistics about how many people die. Like, it puts it into perspective. I mean, and all life lost is valuable, all life lost is a tragedy. I'm not saying anything other than that. But what I'm just ... I'm not diminishing anyone's loss of life, but what I am saying is I was stunned when I saw the actual numbers. So, 2017 to two thu- uh, to 2018, uh, H2N3 pandemic killed 61,000 Americans. Did you know that?
2. BRBrian Redban
  Mm-hmm.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  I didn't know that.
4. BRBrian Redban
  I didn't know that. Did you know that, James?
5. JVJamie Vernon
  I've heard numbers like that recently, yeah, but not before-
6. JRJoe Rogan
  2017 to 2018, hospitalized 30,453 and estimated affected was 894,700 people by that flu. That's crazy. Overall death rate was 7.5 with a peak in January 2018 of 10.8. Again, I'm a moron, not a doctor, reading you a text message. Maybe I shouldn't be doing that.
7. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs)
8. JRJoe Rogan
  Maybe someone should look into this. 2009 pandemic. Now, this is the one that Bert said he had. He said the H1N1.
9. JVJamie Vernon
  Mm-hmm.
10. JRJoe Rogan
  Uh, it killed 83,300 Americans.
11. BRBrian Redban
  Jeez.
12. JRJoe Rogan
  Death rates ranged from 4% to 33% for pediatric, zero to 22%, uh, for 18 to 64, for zero to 4% for those over 65. Man, this is crazy. US cases, 60.8 million, 274,000 hospitalized, 12,469 deaths in the US. Like, th- I'm just going over all these different ones that happened. Flu of the year of 2020, cases reported, 45 million, hospitas- hospitalizations, 415,000; deaths, 48,000. That's for the 2020 flu, this flu season. There's so many people that died of the flu. But obviously this ha- w- when you see healthcare workers freaking out, you know this is different. So, what is different about it? That's-
13. BRBrian Redban
  It's all at the same time.
14. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. It's all at the same time-
15. JVJamie Vernon
  Yeah, it's all at the-
16. JRJoe Rogan
  ... it's new.
17. JVJamie Vernon
  Yeah, yeah.
18. JRJoe Rogan
  It's a new virus. People don't, uh, they don't have immunity for it, they don't really know how to cure it and it attacks the respiratory system. And it seems to have a real quick turnaround from, "I'm not feeling so good," to, "I'm dead." You know, it's, uh, it happens very quickly for some people, shockingly so with some of these r- in ... And it seems to affect different people in different ways. Like, there's a lot going on with this one that has smart people going, "We need to fucking stay home for a bit. Just, uh, everybody chill. No large gatherings."
19. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
20. JRJoe Rogan
  "Just chill."
21. BRBrian Redban
  Do you ever get the flu shot every year? I mean, uh, like, I, I feel like I get the flu almost every year, but I-
22. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
23. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs) ... I never do the flu shot. Like it's-
24. JRJoe Rogan
  Well, maybe you should do the other thing.
25. BRBrian Redban
  Uh, I don't know. Like, I didn't get it last year.
26. JRJoe Rogan
  I don't get the flu shot.
27. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
29. BRBrian Redban
  Is it-
30. JRJoe Rogan
  But I, I would.
50:54 – 1:06:39
Guns, fear, and social stability: ‘essential’ gun stores and preparedness logic
1. JRJoe Rogan
  'Cause there's a bunch of other cigar dorks in there and you guys can all get together. And apparently, is this true? Are cigar bars essential? Is that one of those essential businesses that are open?
2. BRBrian Redban
  I mean, if pot shops are, I can imagine.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. 'Cause here's the thing, people do get addicted to tobacco.
4. BRBrian Redban
  Right.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  So, what do you do about that? Do you say, "Hey, now isn't the time to quit"?
6. BRBrian Redban
  Right.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  "Sorry, you can't, you can't go anywhere"? Or, do you let them, if that's how they get their tobacco fix, do you let them? What do you think?
8. BRBrian Redban
  I would say they're nonessential. But, I mean, pot shops surprise me.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  But liquor stores-
10. BRBrian Redban
  But look at gun shops, man. I, my studio in Burbank is by three gun shops. I did, had no idea. But there's three right next door to me, and there's lines going down the street, like, a mile long-
11. JRJoe Rogan
  Yep.
12. BRBrian Redban
  ... just to get a gun.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. Well-
14. BRBrian Redban
  We have a 10-day waiting great.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. But still, 10 days later you got a gun.
16. BRBrian Redban
  Right.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  A lot of liberals changed their fucking tune.
18. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs)
19. JRJoe Rogan
  I have quite a few friends-
20. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs) Yeah.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  ... who would never consider having a gun. I had a conversation with one of them yesterday. He's like, "I've never had a gun in my life, never considered a gun. I have a gun now." I'm like, "Yeah, that's probably smart."
22. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  You know, better to have it and not to need it than to need it and not to have it.
24. BRBrian Redban
  Right.
25. JRJoe Rogan
  And, you know, I'm hoping people come together. I'm not hoping this turns into some crazy shootout in the streets. But, uh, I am, I'm happy that people understand why people wanted guns in the first place. You know? 'Cause these things can happen. And right now, nothing, nothing has happened, nothing really bad. But we're in a state of chaos. And states of chaos deteriorate or they go away. They don't, you know, it's not like this is the new normal, I don't think. If it's just like this, then great, we don't need any more guns basically, you know? It's like, you, you got a good amount of guns. It's not like everybody needs to go out and get a gun who never considered it before. But if it gets crazy, then you should have a gun.
26. BRBrian Redban
  Right.
27. JRJoe Rogan
  Right? Like, if you don't wanna have a gun, I don't think you should have to have a gun. But what are you gonna do if the whole thing completely falls apart? Imagine this scenario. How would you feel if there was only a few people in your neighborhood with guns and there was people that were coming in and robbing and killing people because we had gone all Walking Dead because the power had been off from the asteroid shower for six months, and there's no way to even tell these people are coming? But there's only two people on your block with guns. But there's 30 houses. Well, what the fuck are you gonna do? You only have two guns and there's 30 houses. That's not good.
28. BRBrian Redban
  Right.
29. JRJoe Rogan
  See, that's what people are scared of. What people are scared of, and maybe they're wrong, but the preppers right now are the ones laughing their asses off. The people with, you know, fucking jarred peaches and shit. Those people that you see on TV with their own well. They're laughing right now. They're laughing. They're, they're hoping it deteriorates even further 'cause they could take over. They could be the king.
30. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah. I, I, uh, wish I had a gun right now.
1:06:39 – 1:23:50
Entertainment rabbit holes: Tiger King, Mike Tyson authenticity, and odd ethics of animals
1. JRJoe Rogan
  Support your immune system, you know? I mean, if this makes a big... Just a little shift in the number of people that get healthy, a little shift in the numb- number of people that start taking vitamins and exercising and, you know... Just do something, man. Something. Put a heavy backpack on, go for a walk. Do something. Listen to a podcast. Oh, I'm listening to this, uh, Aaron Hernandez podcast.
2. BRBrian Redban
  Oh.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Wondery has this podcast called Gladiator about Aaron Hernandez. Holy shit. First of all, it's a great podcast. You ever listen to Wondery?
4. BRBrian Redban
  Mm-mm.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  They know what they're doing, man. They, they... It's, like, really good editing and sound editing. And they, they put depth to it with all these different sound effects and stuff, and different, just different people's, uh, interviews and discussions of people that knew Aaron Hernandez. Holy fuck, what a crazy story.
6. BRBrian Redban
  Hmm.... did you wa- you watched the tiger thing, obviously.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  I've only watched one part of one episode.
8. BRBrian Redban
  Oh, okay.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  I'm saving it.
10. BRBrian Redban
  I'm surprised.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  I know.
12. BRBrian Redban
  I went through all episodes-
13. JRJoe Rogan
  But-
14. BRBrian Redban
  ... in one sitting last night.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  You gotta understand, I have gone down so many tiger rabbit holes, I'm terrified-
16. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs)
17. JRJoe Rogan
  ... to start another one. You remember I... that whole bit that I had about Texas-
18. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  ... and tigers from Triggered?
20. BRBrian Redban
  Mm-hmm.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Dude, I went on a rabbit hole of tiger owners and, and people that own tigers in their backyard because of that.
22. BRBrian Redban
  That's why I think you're gonna love it, like you loved-
23. JRJoe Rogan
  I can't.
24. BRBrian Redban
  ... the Wild West, it's-
25. JRJoe Rogan
  I wrote that bit already.
26. BRBrian Redban
  ... like that time Billy. Yeah, I know. (laughs)
27. JRJoe Rogan
  That bit's done. (laughs)
28. BRBrian Redban
  I know, but you've gotta see this. It's every person's... and, and there's so many twists and turns that you're like, "This is not real life. This is not-"
29. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, yeah.
30. BRBrian Redban
  "... this didn't happen." Like...

Episode duration: 3:22:52

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Foil suits and survival blankets: turning the studio into a “spacesuit” bit

Who’s hurting most: hospitals, hospitality, restaurants, and layoffs

Lockdowns, travel fear, and everyday exposure (Postmates, apartments, grocery stores)

Origin debates to ecology: bats, unintended consequences, and invasive species

Kudzu as a metaphor: how invasive growth mirrors viral spread

Contamination paranoia and DIY sanitation tech (phones, UV, water purifiers)

Cures, misinformation, and media framing: chloroquine and Trump coverage

New York density, cost of living, and why cities amplify outbreaks

Community kindness, fear as a “reset,” and prepping for bigger disasters

Myths and monsters: Noah’s Ark reinterpretation and the ‘sky monster’ tornado bit

Flu vs COVID numbers, testing limits, and why this virus hits differently

Guns, fear, and social stability: ‘essential’ gun stores and preparedness logic

Entertainment rabbit holes: Tiger King, Mike Tyson authenticity, and odd ethics of animals

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