Joe Rogan Experience #1528 - Nikki Glaser

1. 0:00 – 3:20

   Pandemic stand-up withdrawal: drive-ins, spaced crowds, and clubs at risk

   1. JRJoe Rogan0:00

      Three, two, one. Hello, Nikki.

   2. NGNikki Glaser0:02

      (laughs) Hello, Joe Rogan.

   3. JRJoe Rogan0:04

      So, I saw your tweet. This is how this all came about.

   4. NGNikki Glaser0:06

      (laughs)

   5. JRJoe Rogan0:06

      And you said, uh, y- you were gonna shave your head in solidarity for a friend who has cancer.

   6. NGNikki Glaser0:11

      Yeah.

   7. JRJoe Rogan0:11

      And then you were like, "Actually, there was no friend."

   8. NGNikki Glaser0:13

      Yeah. (laughs)

   9. JRJoe Rogan0:13

      And I was like, "Oh, no."

   10. NGNikki Glaser0:14

       Yeah.

   11. JRJoe Rogan0:15

       Nikki's going crazy.

   12. NGNikki Glaser0:16

       (laughs) Yeah, I'm going off the fucking deep end-

   13. JRJoe Rogan0:18

       Well-

   14. NGNikki Glaser0:18

       ... is what I was, said, yes.

   15. JRJoe Rogan0:20

       ... the pro- I think we all are, and I try, I've been trying to, like, check in on everybody because all of us comedians have not had our medicine. You know?

   16. NGNikki Glaser0:29

       That's a good point.

   17. JRJoe Rogan0:30

       This is, like, we're junkies.

   18. NGNikki Glaser0:32

       Yeah.

   19. JRJoe Rogan0:32

       We're laugh junkies, we really are.

   20. NGNikki Glaser0:35

       Mm-hmm.

   21. JRJoe Rogan0:35

       You know? And I didn't realize how much, I mean, I knew I missed it, but I did one weekend in Houston, like a month or s- month or so ago.

   22. NGNikki Glaser0:42

       Mm-hmm.

   23. JRJoe Rogan0:43

       And then right, right away I was like, "Oh my God, I got my fix." Like, I'm-

   24. NGNikki Glaser0:46

       I know.

   25. JRJoe Rogan0:46

       ... and then, uh, you know, talking to all these people that are doing, like, Mark Norm's doing shows in a park.

   26. NGNikki Glaser0:52

       Yep.

   27. JRJoe Rogan0:52

       You know, Bert Kreischer's doing drive-ins, like-

   28. NGNikki Glaser0:54

       I'm doing them too.

   29. JRJoe Rogan0:55

       Are you?

   30. NGNikki Glaser0:56

       Yeah, I'm going out next weekend.
2. 3:20 – 6:09

   New York’s downturn: empty apartments, collapsing rents, and rising crime

   1. NGNikki Glaser3:20

      New York City, I think it's something like 4,000 businesses are done.

   2. JRJoe Rogan3:25

      That is so-

   3. NGNikki Glaser3:26

      In Manhattan.

   4. JRJoe Rogan3:26

      ... crazy.

   5. NGNikki Glaser3:27

      F- some of them, I think that was the number, and I read that, uh, a month and a half ago. It's gotta be more by now.

   6. JRJoe Rogan3:32

      Oh, for sure.

   7. NGNikki Glaser3:32

      4,000, I mean, that, it's... I haven't been there since before COVID even though I have an apartment there and I just hear it's, it's just, I don't wanna be there.

   8. JRJoe Rogan3:40

      Yeah, I have a good buddy of mine who lives there still, he's been there the whole time and he says it's a fucking war zone.

   9. NGNikki Glaser3:45

      Ugh.

   10. JRJoe Rogan3:45

       He said it's terrifying. He said, first of all, there's so much violence. There's so much crime. You, you just can't... He has a friend that's a cop as well.

   11. NGNikki Glaser3:51

       Yeah.

   12. JRJoe Rogan3:51

       And, you know, he sent me the, the sheet of all the things that happened that night and it's just nuts, like, so many shootings.

   13. NGNikki Glaser3:57

       Oh, no.

   14. JRJoe Rogan3:57

       And the shootings were off the charts, they're like back to, like, the 1970s times, like, when Times Square was a, a, a junkie war zone.

   15. NGNikki Glaser4:04

       (sighs) They had it figured out for a couple years there.

   16. JRJoe Rogan4:06

       Yeah. Well, I don't know what y- uh, we were talking about James Altucher wrote a, uh, piece about New York City's dead-

   17. NGNikki Glaser4:14

       Yeah.

   18. JRJoe Rogan4:14

       ... it's not coming back. It's a sobering read.

   19. NGNikki Glaser4:17

       (sighs)

   20. JRJoe Rogan4:17

       It's in The Post today, or yesterday.

   21. NGNikki Glaser4:19

       Mm-hmm.

   22. JRJoe Rogan4:19

       But it's a fucking sobering read. 'Cause you read it and, like, it's not hyperbole, everything he's saying makes sense.

   23. NGNikki Glaser4:27

       Yeah. There's no reason for m- me to go back there. I've, I've been considering going back just bec- just 'cause you don't wanna abandon this city that you like so much and people that are staying there saying, like, "Everyone left."

   24. JRJoe Rogan4:39

       Do you own the apartment?

   25. NGNikki Glaser4:40

       No, thank God.

   26. JRJoe Rogan4:41

       Phew. Dodged that bullet.

   27. NGNikki Glaser4:42

       But I signed on for a-

   28. JRJoe Rogan4:43

       How long?

   29. NGNikki Glaser4:43

       ... I signed up for a lea- a year lease that started March 1st.

   30. JRJoe Rogan4:47

       Oh, yikes. (laughs)
3. 6:09 – 11:26

   Civilization fragility and UFO talk: why “they” might be watching us

   1. JRJoe Rogan6:09

      (laughs) ... there was, uh, e- a bunch of podcasts that I've done about, uh, apocalyptic disasters and downfall of civilizations and, like, the Mayans and the Egyptians and, you know, asteroid impacts that destroyed-

   2. NGNikki Glaser6:23

      And we're right on course?

   3. JRJoe Rogan6:24

      But no, but I was, uh, I was always looking at those going, "Wow, it's fascinating. That's fascinating." But I never thought in my life that I would see something relatively minor-

   4. NGNikki Glaser6:34

      Mm-hmm.

   5. JRJoe Rogan6:34

      ... in terms of, like, the amount of destruction it's done, but in, to, to human life in terms of, you know, like, it's m- worse than a flu, but it's not like the pandemic of 1918 or any of these other horrific disasters that have, that have happened. But to see such an effect that it has on our civilization, you go, "Well, what if there was, like, an asteroid impact? Or what if there was a solar fl- how much worse would it be?"

   6. NGNikki Glaser6:59

      (laughs)

   7. JRJoe Rogan7:00

      It could get a lot worse.

   8. NGNikki Glaser7:02

      Yeah. I think it's... I'm so scared. I've always thought that we were gonna live to see the end.

   9. JRJoe Rogan7:08

      Did you really?

   10. NGNikki Glaser7:09

       I do think that.

   11. JRJoe Rogan7:10

       Why?

   12. NGNikki Glaser7:10

       People always go, "Why... Nikki, every generation thinks they're gonna live to see the end and it never happens." You know? And I go, "Well, someone's gonna be around for it." There will be people here when that h- when the asteroid hits, when the super volcano erupts, when there's-

   13. JRJoe Rogan7:26

       The aliens land.

   14. NGNikki Glaser7:27

       When the aliens land.

   15. JRJoe Rogan7:29

       Yeah.

   16. NGNikki Glaser7:29

       Or when they tell us that they've been here a while, when they finally reveal that they've been here.

   17. JRJoe Rogan7:34

       Is that what you think?

   18. NGNikki Glaser7:35

       I don't know. What do you think?

   19. JRJoe Rogan7:36

       I think so. I think they-

   20. NGNikki Glaser7:37

       They're here.

   21. JRJoe Rogan7:38

       Yeah. I think if there was an island that had chimps that were figuring out dynamite, we'd keep a close eye on 'em.

   22. NGNikki Glaser7:46

       Yeah.

   23. JRJoe Rogan7:47

       If there's a bunch of, like, advanced ch- like right, right now, we have primates, like lower primates. We have monkeys, we have chimps, we have gorillas, and then we have humans.

   24. NGNikki Glaser7:57

       Mm-hmm.

   25. JRJoe Rogan7:57

       There's nothing in between that used to be there, right? But what if we found an island and it did have, like, Australopithecus, and, uh, you know, they had l- you know, maybe they had spears or maybe they had some, some primitive weapons. And, you know, we were keeping an eye on them and someone had figured out dynamite. And... Well, y- they would be studying them so closely, right?

   26. NGNikki Glaser8:17

       But they wouldn't stop them in their tracks?

   27. JRJoe Rogan8:19

       Why would they stop dynamite? Like let 'em wa... Let's see what happens.

   28. NGNikki Glaser8:23

       (laughs)

   29. JRJoe Rogan8:23

       I think they wouldn't.

   30. NGNikki Glaser8:24

       They're just gonna watch us destroy ourselves before they even...
4. 11:26 – 18:53

   Human evolution mysteries: big brains, selective breeding, and alien manipulation theories

   1. JRJoe Rogan11:26

      This is the question. Why are we so different from all the other animals on the planet? Why? If you talk to evolutionary biologists, there's a clear path between lower hominids and human beings, but it's not a path that you could detail every single step of the way and there's some giant holes. And one of the big holes is the size of the human brain. The human brain doubled over a period of two million years, which is apparently, if you talk to biologists, the biggest mystery in the entire fossil record. They have no idea why 'cause not only is it a crazy thing that an organ doubles in size over a period of two million years, but it's the very organ that came up with the idea of evolution in the first place.

   2. NGNikki Glaser12:07

      Ah.

   3. JRJoe Rogan12:07

      It's the, it's the organ that thinks. It's the organ that recognizes consciousness. It's the organ that recognizes creativity and allows people to invent things and, and, you know, and innovation and all, all of the different things that are responsible for all the crazy-... the, the crazy technology that separates human beings from all the other animals all comes from this one thing, the human mind. And this human brain is the one organ that baffles scientists. They have no idea what happened. There's all these theories about, well, maybe it was, uh, psychedelic drugs, like those Terence McKenna's theory-

   4. NGNikki Glaser12:40

      Oh.

   5. JRJoe Rogan12:40

      ... that it was, uh, the, the consumption of psychedelic mushrooms. And then it's other people's theory that it was, well, we figured out fire, we started cooking our food so we had more access to nutrients. And then hunting made people more clever, and so the, the, s- the, the more clever ones survived, and the ones that, that had the larger brain size, that mutation was favored, and natural selection favored larger brains, and then we started-

   6. NGNikki Glaser13:05

      Okay.

   7. JRJoe Rogan13:05

      Another theory is that we're manipulated. Another theory is that these aliens came here eons ago, and they found these primitive primates, and they started genetically manipulating them, and they created human beings. Now what makes it interesting to me is that human beings are so different everywhere, so different. We're, we're like dogs, in that all dogs can fuck each other and make baby dogs.

   8. NGNikki Glaser13:38

      Right.

   9. JRJoe Rogan13:39

      And all people can fuck each other and make baby people. But we look so different. Like, Shaquille O'Neal can have sex with a 4'10" Chinese lady and make a baby.

   10. NGNikki Glaser13:51

       Yeah, he can. Yeah.

   11. JRJoe Rogan13:52

       If you looked at animals, a Great Dane can have sex with a Chihuahua, if it's possible-

   12. NGNikki Glaser13:58

       Mm-hmm.

   13. JRJoe Rogan13:58

       ... or a bulldog, and make this ... Like, if you looked at a wolf and you looked at a poodle, you'd go, "There's no way that's the same thing."

   14. NGNikki Glaser14:07

       Right.

   15. JRJoe Rogan14:07

       But it is the same thing.

   16. NGNikki Glaser14:09

       But it is.

   17. JRJoe Rogan14:09

       It is the same thing.

   18. NGNikki Glaser14:10

       So why are we different as dogs?

   19. JRJoe Rogan14:11

       So, but why ... It's ... But why is it the same thing? It's the same thing 'cause we manipulated them.

   20. NGNikki Glaser14:15

       Oh, yeah.

   21. JRJoe Rogan14:16

       That's the only reason why there are German Shepherds and-

   22. NGNikki Glaser14:19

       We force them to fuck each other.

   23. JRJoe Rogan14:20

       ... Golden Retrievers. Yeah, we made them that way. We made them through manipulation. We, we slowly but surely turned them, and we don't even know how.

   24. NGNikki Glaser14:28

       So someone breeded us.

   25. JRJoe Rogan14:30

       Someone very possibly could have done something to human beings which changed us from these lower hominids and turned us into a bunch of different versions of what we call human beings.

   26. NGNikki Glaser14:43

       Right.

   27. JRJoe Rogan14:43

       I mean, that's my m- moreonic-

   28. NGNikki Glaser14:45

       I kinda like that.

   29. JRJoe Rogan14:46

       ... theory.

   30. NGNikki Glaser14:46

       No, that's not-
5. 18:53 – 29:11

   COVID health talk: vitamin D, supplements, testing, and reopening frustration

   1. NGNikki Glaser18:53

      Now, how do you get your D?

   2. JRJoe Rogan18:54

      I take it.

   3. NGNikki Glaser18:54

      You're going out, you take it again, you stay out.

   4. JRJoe Rogan18:56

      I, I go outside.

   5. NGNikki Glaser18:56

      Yeah, you do.

   6. JRJoe Rogan18:57

      Yeah, yeah. I go outside too, but I take it. I take vitamin D every day.

   7. NGNikki Glaser19:00

      Like a pill?

   8. JRJoe Rogan19:01

      Yeah, I take 5,000... Yeah, I take a gel cap.

   9. NGNikki Glaser19:03

      Okay.

   10. JRJoe Rogan19:03

       It's 5,000 IUs, I take it twice a day.

   11. NGNikki Glaser19:06

       Mm-hmm.

   12. JRJoe Rogan19:06

       It's very... Vitamin D is very important with COVID.

   13. NGNikki Glaser19:08

       Mm-hmm. But isn't the absorption of D dependent on how much iron you ha-... Like, I just feel like it just goes through you unless you have all the other stuff.

   14. JRJoe Rogan19:16

       You do need the other stuff. You-

   15. NGNikki Glaser19:18

       Yeah.

   16. JRJoe Rogan19:18

       Well, you need fat, like most of these muscle, most of these, um, uh, vitamins rather, they're fat soluble. Some of them are water soluble, but they d- digest better with food because that's really normally where you're getting them, other than D, which is where you get from the sun.

   17. NGNikki Glaser19:33

       Yeah.

   18. JRJoe Rogan19:33

       But, uh, Dr. Rhonda Patrick, she explained it to me in a really interesting way. She said, "It really is a hormone." Vitamin D is, we call it a vitamin and you can take it as a supplement-

   19. NGNikki Glaser19:42

       Mm-hmm.

   20. JRJoe Rogan19:42

       ... but it is a hormone, and it's responsible for so many different things in the body, and particularly for the immune system. And when you don't have vitamin D in your system, your immune system is very vulnerable.

   21. NGNikki Glaser19:52

       Yeah.

   22. JRJoe Rogan19:52

       So, they were saying that there's all these studies that correlated with this. They're saying that out of people that were in the ICU for COVID, more than 80% of them in multiple studies had insufficient levels of vitamin D.

   23. NGNikki Glaser20:04

       Mm-hmm.

   24. JRJoe Rogan20:04

       And only 4% had sufficient levels.

   25. NGNikki Glaser20:08

       Okay.

   26. JRJoe Rogan20:08

       Which is really crazy.

   27. NGNikki Glaser20:09

       Well, then, there we go.

   28. JRJoe Rogan20:10

       Yeah, vitamin D-

   29. NGNikki Glaser20:10

       Take your D.

   30. JRJoe Rogan20:11

       ... zinc, and vitamin C, they, they're saying are the three most, uh, significant vitamins for, uh, dealing with, uh, COVID.
6. 29:11 – 37:31

   Masks, sunlight, protests, and evolving guidance: what people get wrong

   1. NGNikki Glaser29:11

      I'm so annoyed. I f- I flew here from St. Louis the other day, and just sitting at my gate, and it's mandatory to wear a mask on the plane now. But people, before, before they get on that plane, they're just sitting there without their mask on at the gate, just like-

   2. JRJoe Rogan29:25

      Really?

   3. NGNikki Glaser29:25

      ... just t- trying to stir up shit, just trying to get away... 'Cause they kn- everyone around you is wearing a mask. How could you not wear one? You know del-

   4. JRJoe Rogan29:34

      You think that's what they're doing?

   5. NGNikki Glaser29:35

      Yeah. They just, they d- they wanna sh- prove that they're not falling for it and they're better than you, and they're ... It's so deliberate and it makes me sick. And it's, it's hard because I want to shoot them a dirty look, but they can't really see how much I hate them on my face-

   6. JRJoe Rogan29:49

      (laughs)

   7. NGNikki Glaser29:49

      ... 'cause it's covered by a mask. So I really try to squint my eyes just like, "You motherfucker." I was so furious the other day. Just people with the loose mask down by their nose. I had a driver the other day that had his nose exposed and I just am like, "Hey, can you... You pull it up over your nose. It's the only way it works." Like, do I really have to ... You haven't seen that meme yet?

   8. JRJoe Rogan30:07

      Yeah.

   9. NGNikki Glaser30:07

      With the guy with his dick out? Like, how has that not gotten to you that that's how-

   10. JRJoe Rogan30:10

       Yeah.

   11. NGNikki Glaser30:10

       ... you wear a mask?

   12. JRJoe Rogan30:11

       Yeah.

   13. NGNikki Glaser30:11

       People just ... It's, it's ... I don't know. I, I ... E- everyone I'm, I'm staying, uh, in Marina Del Rey, everyone walking outside is wearing a mask, which I think is a little much, just, like, walking down the sidewalk. We're-

   14. JRJoe Rogan30:23

       You don't need it when it's sunny out. They, they w-

   15. NGNikki Glaser30:25

       What?

   16. JRJoe Rogan30:26

       Yeah. The s- the disease, the virus dies instantly in, when it's exposed to sunlight.

   17. NGNikki Glaser30:32

       Okay. What? Why-

   18. JRJoe Rogan30:33

       Yeah.

   19. NGNikki Glaser30:33

       ... are ... Why don't we know that, Joe?

   20. JRJoe Rogan30:35

       I don't know, but, uh, Bret Weinstein, who's a biologist, sent me this paper where they showed that it dies instantly in ... when it's in ... or almost instantly when it's in contact with, uh, fake sunlight, like, uh, ultraviolet light-

   21. NGNikki Glaser30:50

       Okay.

   22. JRJoe Rogan30:50

       ... and also, also actual sunlight, so when you're in sunlight. Like, you're ... If you're outside, like, you're ... That's why the closing the beach is so fucking stupid. Like, it's sunny. Like, you're not at risk. As long as you're not, like-

   23. NGNikki Glaser31:01

       Right.

   24. JRJoe Rogan31:01

       ... in someone's face, you're not gonna get it.

   25. NGNikki Glaser31:03

       And did they see a spike after the protests?

   26. JRJoe Rogan31:06

       Yes.

   27. NGNikki Glaser31:06

       Uh, after all the-

   28. JRJoe Rogan31:07

       For sure.

   29. NGNikki Glaser31:07

       That was ... There was a spike-

   30. JRJoe Rogan31:08

       100%.
7. 37:31 – 42:14

   Writing books and learning comedy: transcription, copying influences, and finding your voice

   1. NGNikki Glaser37:31

      Yeah. Well, I'm, I mean, I'm, thank, yeah, thank God for podcasting. Thank God, you know, I'm trying to write a goddamn book. Have you-

   2. JRJoe Rogan37:41

      (laughs)

   3. NGNikki Glaser37:41

      Have you, have you written a book?

   4. JRJoe Rogan37:42

      No. No.

   5. NGNikki Glaser37:43

      Why haven't you written a book?

   6. JRJoe Rogan37:44

      Well, I got a deal to write a book once.

   7. NGNikki Glaser37:45

      Of course you have.

   8. JRJoe Rogan37:46

      And the, the editors were so annoying-

   9. NGNikki Glaser37:48

      (laughs)

   10. JRJoe Rogan37:48

       ... I gave them their money back.

   11. NGNikki Glaser37:50

       Really? (laughs)

   12. JRJoe Rogan37:50

       Yeah.

   13. NGNikki Glaser37:51

       Just like, "Hey, do you have these pages yet?"

   14. JRJoe Rogan37:53

       Yeah.

   15. NGNikki Glaser37:53

       "Hey, we, uh, like, like, just-"

   16. JRJoe Rogan37:54

       Well, they base it on some stuff that I wrote on my blog-

   17. NGNikki Glaser37:57

       Mm-hmm.

   18. JRJoe Rogan37:57

       ... that was, you know, sometimes funny, just bu- but weird, just th- thoughts that I had.

   19. NGNikki Glaser38:01

       Yeah.

   20. JRJoe Rogan38:02

       And, uh, but then once I started turning in stuff, they're like, "We wanna transcribe your standup."

   21. NGNikki Glaser38:09

       Mm-hmm.

   22. JRJoe Rogan38:09

       'Cause Jerry Seinfeld did that, and, and, uh, uh, and, uh, fucking, who else did it?

   23. NGNikki Glaser38:14

       Ellen.

   24. JRJoe Rogan38:15

       George Carlin.

   25. NGNikki Glaser38:15

       Mm-hmm.

   26. JRJoe Rogan38:16

       And I'm like, "Look, George Carlin did it 'cause he needed money." Right?

   27. NGNikki Glaser38:18

       Right.

   28. JRJoe Rogan38:18

       He was broke, taxes-

   29. NGNikki Glaser38:20

       Oh.

   30. JRJoe Rogan38:20

       And I don't know why Seinfeld did it. They probably just paid him and he said okay. But I'm like, "I'm not doing that." Like, if I'm writing, if I wanna write a book-
8. 42:14 – 52:42

   Dating with fame: suspicion, being ‘used,’ and the painful fan-on-a-plane story

   1. NGNikki Glaser42:14

      See, I have young guys-

   2. JRJoe Rogan42:15

      ... savage.

   3. NGNikki Glaser42:15

      ... coming after me, and I feel like they're using me so that they can just, like, somehow have a story about, like, fucking an older woman. And I don't wanna be that, like...

   4. JRJoe Rogan42:25

      Hm, that's interesting.

   5. NGNikki Glaser42:26

      I, I don't wanna be used.

   6. JRJoe Rogan42:27

      Why wouldn't you just think they're attracted to you 'cause you're confident and intelligent?

   7. NGNikki Glaser42:30

      Um, because I think it's some weird fetish they have, or they, like, they are, they had a speech therapist that they-... like, got boners for-

   8. JRJoe Rogan42:40

      (laughs)

   9. NGNikki Glaser42:40

      ... and I remind them of her. I, like, there's something-

   10. JRJoe Rogan42:43

       Why wouldn't you just not think that you're sexy? Why, why wouldn't you just assume that?

   11. NGNikki Glaser42:46

       I don't know, because I just don't look at myself that way.

   12. JRJoe Rogan42:50

       Hmm.

   13. NGNikki Glaser42:50

       I cannot... There are certain times where I do feel really sexy and I, um, and I ca- I can feel that way, but generally when someone's into me, I go, "What's going on here?"

   14. JRJoe Rogan42:59

       (laughs)

   15. NGNikki Glaser42:59

       "What do you want?" 'Cause it can't be that you wanna have sex with me. Even though I know I'm an attractive girl and, like, I, I work on being attractive. It's not like I'm... I don't think I'm a dog, but-

   16. JRJoe Rogan43:08

       You're suspicious.

   17. NGNikki Glaser43:10

       Yeah, I'm suspicious.

   18. JRJoe Rogan43:11

       (laughs)

   19. NGNikki Glaser43:11

       And you wanna know why? Because sometimes I'm fucking right.

   20. JRJoe Rogan43:14

       (gasps)

   21. NGNikki Glaser43:14

       And especially since I've gotten a little bit more famous-

   22. JRJoe Rogan43:17

       Oh.

   23. NGNikki Glaser43:17

       ... it, that happens. And I, uh, and because of, as I've gotten a little, slightly more famous, I, my self-esteem has, um, risen a bit in terms of just I like myself and I'm like, "Oh, maybe this guy does like me for me." And then it happens that they just want an autograph from you, or they want-

   24. JRJoe Rogan43:38

       (laughs)

   25. NGNikki Glaser43:38

       Honestly, someone wrote me that today, a, a, a guy that has been in- interested in me and asking me out a ton. And he just wrote me today, like, "Hey, I heard you're gonna be on Rogan, um, if there's any chance you could get an autograph from him, that would be so cool. Thank you so..." And I just wrote back, "No." Like, just "No."

   26. JRJoe Rogan43:55

       (laughs)

   27. NGNikki Glaser43:55

       With nothing else, and it felt so good.

   28. JRJoe Rogan43:58

       No, and you don't even bother putting a period.

   29. NGNikki Glaser44:00

       No, I didn't say, "No, I'm sorry."

   30. JRJoe Rogan44:02

       No.
9. 52:42 – 59:58

   Nikki’s on-and-off relationship, sexual drought, and why ‘just sex’ is rarely just sex

   1. NGNikki Glaser52:42

      I know. I feel like, uh, you know, I've been, I've been circling the same guy for a really long time.

   2. JRJoe Rogan52:48

      How long?

   3. NGNikki Glaser52:48

      I've only had-

   4. JRJoe Rogan52:48

      Like a shark?

   5. NGNikki Glaser52:49

      Oh, yeah.

   6. JRJoe Rogan52:50

      Or like a cat?

   7. NGNikki Glaser52:52

      C- like a, like that s- extinct mouse.

   8. JRJoe Rogan52:55

      (laughs)

   9. NGNikki Glaser52:56

      Scampering about. People haven't seen me since the '60s. Like, I just-

   10. JRJoe Rogan53:01

       (laughs)

   11. NGNikki Glaser53:02

       It's not, uh ... Yeah, it's, uh, I've- I've only really had one, um, actual relationship and we have just ... We've gotten, we've got back together, back and forth for, like, five or six years. Broke up and got back together, broke up and got back together and then f- ... We haven't been together for over, like, three years now, but we slept together for a while even after that. But we haven't slept together for, like, a year and s- some change and, um ... And he t- and oddly enough, he just moved back to St. Louis, too.

   12. JRJoe Rogan53:30

       Oh, shit.

   13. NGNikki Glaser53:30

       We both met in New York City, but he just ... And he's living with his parents, too-

   14. JRJoe Rogan53:33

       Oh, perfect.

   15. NGNikki Glaser53:34

       ... in St. Louis as we're both looking to f- what we're gonna do next.

   16. JRJoe Rogan53:37

       Mm.

   17. NGNikki Glaser53:37

       Yeah, you'd think it was perfect, but he won't have sex with me.

   18. JRJoe Rogan53:40

       What?

   19. NGNikki Glaser53:41

       I know.

   20. JRJoe Rogan53:41

       He won't?

   21. NGNikki Glaser53:41

       Because I think he, like-

   22. JRJoe Rogan53:43

       Is gay?

   23. NGNikki Glaser53:44

       ... cares about me.

   24. JRJoe Rogan53:45

       Oh.

   25. NGNikki Glaser53:46

       And, like, doesn't wanna-

   26. JRJoe Rogan53:47

       Right.

   27. NGNikki Glaser53:48

       ... upset me because I tend to have sex with someone and then I get-

   28. JRJoe Rogan53:51

       Attached.

   29. NGNikki Glaser53:51

       ... my hopes up a little bit. I mean, I got my hopes up on a plane with a g- in a conversation with a guy. I was, like, planning our future together.

   30. JRJoe Rogan53:57

       What were you thinking? What was, like, the ultimate goal? Like, you were seeing the babies, you're seeing the whole thing?
10. 59:58 – 1:12:12

    Raya, A-lister sexting, and the ‘Irresistible’ lens: dating apps as addiction loops

    1. NGNikki Glaser59:58

       I don't know what I'm gonna do. I'm on Raya.

    2. JRJoe Rogan1:00:00

       That is the thing.

    3. NGNikki Glaser1:00:00

       I'm on, um ...

    4. JRJoe Rogan1:00:02

       Raya's a, an, a dating app-

    5. NGNikki Glaser1:00:03

       The celebrity dating app.

    6. JRJoe Rogan1:00:04

       ... for celebrities, right?

    7. NGNikki Glaser1:00:04

       Mm-hmm. I like a blue check mark, and it's not because I like guys that are famous because they're famous and I wanna be famous. It has nothing to d- maybe it has, like, a little bit to do with that. I'm not gonna say it has nothing to do with that. Yeah, the, there's something hot about a guy being extremely successful and other people thinking that he's cool. Okay, yes, I'll give you that. I think it's because I get, I can, I can know them before I go into the date.

    8. JRJoe Rogan1:00:28

       Right.

    9. NGNikki Glaser1:00:28

       I can watch their stuff. I, I feel like I'm already acquainted with them. That's why I like a blue check mark. It validate, it, like I can get to know you before I go on a date. I don't like going into these things blind. So that's-

    10. JRJoe Rogan1:00:40

        I get it.

    11. NGNikki Glaser1:00:40

        ... that's why I like a blue check. But there's no one in St. Louis that's on the goddamn app, and um-

    12. JRJoe Rogan1:00:45

        No one?

    13. NGNikki Glaser1:00:46

        No.

    14. JRJoe Rogan1:00:46

        Not one person?

    15. NGNikki Glaser1:00:48

        Um, n- really, honestly, no.

    16. JRJoe Rogan1:00:50

        Wow.

    17. NGNikki Glaser1:00:50

        There's no one in St. Louis on them.

    18. JRJoe Rogan1:00:52

        Where are they all, New York and LA?

    19. NGNikki Glaser1:00:53

        Yeah.... or, like, Stockholm. I mean, it's all over the globe. They, they, they're-

    20. JRJoe Rogan1:00:57

        Oh.

    21. NGNikki Glaser1:00:57

        ... uh, it's, it's global.

    22. JRJoe Rogan1:00:58

        Oh.

    23. NGNikki Glaser1:00:58

        And so I'm connecting with some guys on that. And, and when I come to t- ... And then I just always get so busy when I come here, I don't wanna go on a first date with someone. I just wanna hang out with my friends that I haven't seen in forever.

    24. JRJoe Rogan1:01:07

        Yeah, I've been, I've been into this book lately. It's called, uh, Irresistible. It's about, uh, addictions.

    25. NGNikki Glaser1:01:11

        I just downloaded it-

    26. JRJoe Rogan1:01:12

        Did you?

    27. NGNikki Glaser1:01:12

        ... because I saw you recommend it. And, oh my God.

    28. JRJoe Rogan1:01:15

        That's heavy, right?

    29. NGNikki Glaser1:01:16

        Y- yeah.

    30. JRJoe Rogan1:01:17

        Go-

Episode duration: 2:32:52