Joe Rogan Experience #1529 - Whitney Cummings & Annie Lederman

1. 0:00 – 1:36

   Reuniting at the Comedy Store: why comics miss the “back bar” vibe

   1. JRJoe Rogan0:00

      Doo, doo. First of all, how do you two not have a show together?

   2. ALAnnie Lederman0:03

      (laughs)

   3. WCWhitney Cummings0:03

      I don't know.

   4. JRJoe Rogan0:04

      'Cause hanging, hanging with you guys the other night-

   5. ALAnnie Lederman0:05

      (laughs)

   6. JRJoe Rogan0:05

      ... at the store, first of all, how much fun was that?

   7. WCWhitney Cummings0:08

      The best.

   8. ALAnnie Lederman0:09

      It was so much fun.

   9. WCWhitney Cummings0:09

      It was so fun. But is that what it... I can't remember 'cause it's been so long. It's been like six months now. Was that what every night was like?

   10. JRJoe Rogan0:15

       A lot of nights were like that.

   11. ALAnnie Lederman0:16

       We just had the craziest... Like a circus freak night.

   12. WCWhitney Cummings0:19

       (laughs)

   13. JRJoe Rogan0:19

       Just fun, just laughing constantly.

   14. WCWhitney Cummings0:21

       The best.

   15. ALAnnie Lederman0:21

       Oh my God.

   16. JRJoe Rogan0:21

       We used to go to the back bar and crack each other up.

   17. WCWhitney Cummings0:24

       Yep.

   18. JRJoe Rogan0:24

       That was the constant thing.

   19. ALAnnie Lederman0:25

       Mm-hmm.

   20. WCWhitney Cummings0:25

       For hours.

   21. JRJoe Rogan0:26

       It was either in the back bar or the back smoking area, and everybody was laughing.

   22. ALAnnie Lederman0:29

       Yep.

   23. JRJoe Rogan0:29

       And y- you get like a low-grade depression when you're not around it-

   24. ALAnnie Lederman0:33

       (laughs)

   25. WCWhitney Cummings0:33

       Yeah, it's so true.

   26. JRJoe Rogan0:34

       ... and you forget. You forget for months and months and months. And then we had one night where we were all like, ah!

   27. ALAnnie Lederman0:39

       (laughs)

   28. WCWhitney Cummings0:39

       (laughs) That's so true.

   29. JRJoe Rogan0:39

       Just shooting up and saying ridiculous shit.

   30. ALAnnie Lederman0:41

       I do feel like I had like a crush on the night. Like I kept thinking about it-
2. 1:36 – 3:30

   Malaria, mosquitoes, and fear of the unknown in public health

   1. JRJoe Rogan1:36

      Yeah, we don't know, right? What if it's an annual thing, it keeps coming back? I have a friend who got malaria, and then he got malaria again when he got sick. So it had been dormant inside of his system. My friend, Justin Wren, he runs Fight for the Forgotten. He does charities in, uh, the Congo where he builds wells for the pygmies. And he's there all... He got malaria three fucking times.

   2. ALAnnie Lederman1:54

      Jesus.

   3. JRJoe Rogan1:54

      And so he goes over there, he gets malaria, like deathly ill, comes back, and then he beats it, does all the medication. And then a long time later, he gets really sick. And when he gets sick, the malaria kicks back in again, and he wasn't even in the Congo.

   4. ALAnnie Lederman2:07

      The mara- malaria's like-

   5. WCWhitney Cummings2:08

      Whoa.

   6. ALAnnie Lederman2:08

      ... not to be forgotten.

   7. WCWhitney Cummings2:09

      (laughs)

   8. JRJoe Rogan2:09

      No.

   9. ALAnnie Lederman2:10

      He's like, "This is a charity for me."

   10. JRJoe Rogan2:11

       Malaria has killed more people than anything.

   11. WCWhitney Cummings2:14

       That's right.

   12. JRJoe Rogan2:15

       Like anything ever.

   13. WCWhitney Cummings2:15

       More than wars, I think, right?

   14. JRJoe Rogan2:16

       Yeah. Mm-hmm.

   15. ALAnnie Lederman2:16

       My dad had malaria. He was born in... His da-... He was born in Panama 'cause his dad was stationed there, and he got malaria when he was a baby, but it never came up again.

   16. JRJoe Rogan2:24

       I think-

   17. ALAnnie Lederman2:24

       He never had any problems with it.

   18. WCWhitney Cummings2:25

       Mm-mm.

   19. JRJoe Rogan2:25

       Jamie, didn't we look this up? Didn't it, didn't they say that... Oh no, I fucked this up. That malaria has killed half the people who've ever died, ever? Yeah, yeah, well-

   20. WCWhitney Cummings2:32

       Whoa.

   21. JRJoe Rogan2:33

       Something that like that-

   22. WCWhitney Cummings2:34

       That's wild.

   23. JRJoe Rogan2:35

       That, that's, uh, that... When we looked it up, it's been ex-aggerated a little bit, but it's definitely killed a lot of people, but it's hard to say. Let's say a quarter. If we say a quarter, it's probably pretty- Something like that. Imagine that. Just let's say a qu- 25% of all the people-

   24. ALAnnie Lederman2:45

       Damn.

   25. JRJoe Rogan2:45

       ... who've ever died ever-

   26. WCWhitney Cummings2:46

       That's wild. From bugs.

   27. JRJoe Rogan2:46

       ... been killed by malaria.

   28. WCWhitney Cummings2:47

       Mosquitoes, right?

   29. JRJoe Rogan2:48

       Yeah. So they just, I just put this on my Twitter, or my, uh, Instagram, that they've released or they're about to release some fucking untold hundreds of millions of genetically modified mosquitoes in the Everglades.

   30. WCWhitney Cummings2:59

       I saw that.
3. 3:30 – 5:44

   Pee-tape politics and the ‘nothing matters anymore’ election mood

   1. JRJoe Rogan3:30

      Do you think the pee tape is real and is it gonna come out like right before the election? But if it does come out right before the election-

   2. ALAnnie Lederman3:35

      Nobody's gonna care.

   3. JRJoe Rogan3:35

      ... but does it work now because of the mail-in thing? Like people are-

   4. WCWhitney Cummings3:39

      Mm-hmm.

   5. JRJoe Rogan3:39

      They're voting already, right?

   6. WCWhitney Cummings3:41

      Right. Right. I, I think we are sort of at a point where nothing fucking matters. We're in this-

   7. JRJoe Rogan3:46

      Mm-hmm.

   8. WCWhitney Cummings3:46

      ... sort of like nihilistic thing where it's like if a pee tape came out right now of Trump like peeing on someone, we'd just be like-

   9. ALAnnie Lederman3:51

      They don't care. Nobody ca-

   10. WCWhitney Cummings3:53

       Like as long as it's-

   11. ALAnnie Lederman3:53

       People that like Trump do... Aren't like, "I like him 'cause of how he treats women."

   12. WCWhitney Cummings3:56

       As long as, as long as he-

   13. ALAnnie Lederman3:57

       They don't... "I like how he doesn't pee on women. I love how women leave the room with him dry from urine."

   14. WCWhitney Cummings4:01

       As long as he didn't apologize, he'd be fine. (laughs)

   15. ALAnnie Lederman4:04

       Yeah, exactly.

   16. JRJoe Rogan4:05

       Right.

   17. WCWhitney Cummings4:05

       As soon as you apologize, you're fucked.

   18. ALAnnie Lederman4:07

       You can't cancel Trump.

   19. WCWhitney Cummings4:07

       It's like it's, it's, it's like in a car accident, the first person to apologize, it's their fault, so you gotta just get out in the car accident-

   20. JRJoe Rogan4:12

       Yeah.

   21. WCWhitney Cummings4:12

       ... and just be like, "What the fuck, man? What the fuck was that?"

   22. JRJoe Rogan4:14

       But it is a gross thing when someone hits you and then they say that was your fault, and you're like, "Oh, this is the grossest-"

   23. ALAnnie Lederman4:18

       No, never apologize. You told me that your dad taught you that, right?

   24. WCWhitney Cummings4:20

       Never apologize. Yep.

   25. JRJoe Rogan4:22

       In a car accident.

   26. ALAnnie Lederman4:22

       Which you told me-

   27. WCWhitney Cummings4:22

       Never.

   28. ALAnnie Lederman4:23

       ... after I got in a car accident. You were like, "The one advice my dad gave me that was-

   29. WCWhitney Cummings4:26

       (laughs)

   30. ALAnnie Lederman4:26

       ... the best advice was when you're in a car accident, never say sorry 'cause you'll get blamed for it."
4. 5:44 – 9:19

   Roast culture, mock anger, and why edgy jokes still work in real rooms

   1. WCWhitney Cummings5:44

      Something that was so important at the Comedy Store the other night is that these last six months have sort of hoodwinked me into believing that like jokes are dead, that we're not allowed to make jokes anymore.

   2. JRJoe Rogan5:53

      Right.

   3. WCWhitney Cummings5:53

      And c- because Twitter-

   4. ALAnnie Lederman5:55

      Right.

   5. WCWhitney Cummings5:55

      ... has sort of, you know... We're hallucinating with all the shit we're seeing on Twitter and, and blowing it up to be bigger than, uh, it should be. But like as soon as I saw Tony Hinchcliffe, I through-

   6. ALAnnie Lederman6:03

      (laughs)

   7. WCWhitney Cummings6:03

      I said the most-

   8. ALAnnie Lederman6:04

      Oh my God.

   9. WCWhitney Cummings6:04

      ... offensive shit possible, and everyone exploded in laughter. And I was like, "Ah."

   10. JRJoe Rogan6:08

       Yeah.

   11. WCWhitney Cummings6:08

       "The fuck is back."

   12. JRJoe Rogan6:09

       Oh, he's the best for that. That little motherfucker will say the most evil shit.

   13. WCWhitney Cummings6:13

       (laughs)

   14. ALAnnie Lederman6:13

       No, the moment something happens. There's no too soon for... I mean, Tony's like-

   15. JRJoe Rogan6:17

       No, no, no, no, no. Not Tony.

   16. WCWhitney Cummings6:18

       But I don't, I don't think we're designed to just be on the internet. If you're just on the internet and not seeing human beings and making jokes-

   17. JRJoe Rogan6:23

       Right.

   18. WCWhitney Cummings6:23

       ... around actual people, you can be tricked into thinking that that shit's real.

   19. JRJoe Rogan6:27

       Well, Stanhope really said it best once. He said, "I could quit comedy, but I couldn't quit comics."

   20. ALAnnie Lederman6:31

       Mm-hmm.

   21. WCWhitney Cummings6:31

       Mm.

   22. JRJoe Rogan6:31

       And that's what the other night was like. Like I've, I've had my little fix where I did a weekend in Houston, uh, a couple, like a month or so ago, but it wasn't as fun as last, that night.

   23. ALAnnie Lederman6:40

       Ugh, it was so fun.

   24. JRJoe Rogan6:40

       That night was the most fun because it was just a bunch of comics-

   25. WCWhitney Cummings6:43

       (laughs)

   26. JRJoe Rogan6:43

       ... just laughing at each other.

   27. ALAnnie Lederman6:45

       Stop.

   28. WCWhitney Cummings6:46

       Saying a bunch of shit that will get us canceled.

   29. ALAnnie Lederman6:48

       Screaming, laughing, talking over each other. It was just like amazing.

   30. JRJoe Rogan6:51

       But it's the art form of saying shit you don't really mean-
5. 9:19 – 11:19

   Meet-cute chaos: Roast Battle origin story and “smile more” backlash

   1. WCWhitney Cummings9:19

      That's where Andy and I met the first time.

   2. ALAnnie Lederman9:20

      Mm-hmm. Oh, should we talk about it? (laughs) Yeah.

   3. WCWhitney Cummings9:23

      Our meet cute story?

   4. ALAnnie Lederman9:25

      We, yeah-

   5. WCWhitney Cummings9:25

      We didn't start off on great terms.

   6. JRJoe Rogan9:27

      Uh-oh.

   7. ALAnnie Lederman9:27

      It was, it was okay, though. It wasn't that bad. You, you texted me so fast after it, though. I was like, "It's so weird Whitney Cummings just texted me." But, um-

   8. WCWhitney Cummings9:34

      You are intimidating. I am gonna say that. There's something very intimidating about you. It's 'cause you're showing your midriff at all times. (laughs)

   9. ALAnnie Lederman9:41

      It doesn't matter, all, all different shapes of muffins, it doesn't matter what genre.

   10. WCWhitney Cummings9:45

       I'm afraid I'm gonna get tetanus from your poops.

   11. JRJoe Rogan9:46

       Well, you're, you're confident, that's one thing.

   12. ALAnnie Lederman9:48

       It's Asperger's, honestly. (laughs)

   13. JRJoe Rogan9:49

       But there's a, there's a fear that you could be mean.

   14. ALAnnie Lederman9:51

       (laughs) Yeah.

   15. JRJoe Rogan9:52

       So that's what people are scared of, that you're confident but you might be mean. It's like, "Ooh, I gotta tread lightly."

   16. WCWhitney Cummings9:56

       She's a beast.

   17. ALAnnie Lederman9:56

       I always think the funniest thing is, like, the truth.

   18. WCWhitney Cummings9:58

       You also dress, you wear military garb, you dress like a Navy SEAL. (laughs)

   19. ALAnnie Lederman10:01

       I do look, like, anti-Semitic, I'm gonna be honest, with these boots.

   20. JRJoe Rogan10:04

       What happened to those boots?

   21. ALAnnie Lederman10:05

       You know, I just was like, "Should I wear-"

   22. JRJoe Rogan10:06

       Those are a choice?

   23. ALAnnie Lederman10:06

       "... sneakers or boots?"

   24. WCWhitney Cummings10:07

       Annie's dad didn't love her.

   25. JRJoe Rogan10:09

       But you bought those.

   26. ALAnnie Lederman10:09

       No, my dad loved me a lot. He just was-

   27. WCWhitney Cummings10:10

       Too much?

   28. ALAnnie Lederman10:11

       Very mean. No, not that much. (laughs)

   29. WCWhitney Cummings10:14

       (laughs)

   30. JRJoe Rogan10:14

       (laughs)
6. 11:19 – 21:59

   Fame logistics: assistants, boundaries, and the David Spade horror story

   1. ALAnnie Lederman11:19

      Well, you said to me, I was saying, I was like, "I'm, when I'm rich, I'm gonna get a chef." And you were like, "Keep your circle small, Annie." You were like, "You don't want a fucking chef."

   2. JRJoe Rogan11:27

      You don't even want an assistant.

   3. ALAnnie Lederman11:28

      Yeah.

   4. WCWhitney Cummings11:28

      Mm-hmm.

   5. JRJoe Rogan11:29

      Yeah, when you, when you have an assistant, that means you do too much shit.

   6. ALAnnie Lederman11:32

      Yeah.

   7. JRJoe Rogan11:32

      Do less shit.

   8. WCWhitney Cummings11:32

      That's a good point. And by the time you tell someone to do something, you could've just done it yourself.

   9. ALAnnie Lederman11:36

      Yeah.

   10. JRJoe Rogan11:36

       Look, you could get lucky. I have friends that have, have had assistants that wind up being their best friends, and it's great. They're just a cool person that they met-

   11. WCWhitney Cummings11:43

       Yeah, yeah. I kinda have that, yeah.

   12. JRJoe Rogan11:43

       ... that needed a job. But I also have friends that got sued by their assistant, and David Spade got tasered and tied up.

   13. ALAnnie Lederman11:48

       (laughs) He got tied.

   14. WCWhitney Cummings11:49

       Almost murdered.

   15. JRJoe Rogan11:50

       Almost murdered by his assistant.

   16. ALAnnie Lederman11:51

       I'm sorry to see.

   17. JRJoe Rogan11:51

       His assistant was trying to kill him.

   18. WCWhitney Cummings11:52

       See, David Spade-

   19. ALAnnie Lederman11:53

       Not a funny bite.

   20. WCWhitney Cummings11:53

       David Spade has on his bedroom door a fucking, a latch, like a, like a Medieval wooden latch that-

   21. ALAnnie Lederman11:59

       And the fucked up part is it's from the, it's from the outside, so when you go in-

   22. WCWhitney Cummings12:02

       (laughs)

   23. JRJoe Rogan12:02

       (laughs)

   24. ALAnnie Lederman12:02

       ... you can't leave.

   25. WCWhitney Cummings12:03

       Imagine being a girl going in to hook up with David Spade and he's like...

   26. ALAnnie Lederman12:06

       He's like...

   27. WCWhitney Cummings12:06

       Ka-chunk.

   28. JRJoe Rogan12:07

       "Hey, can I get you something to drink?"

   29. ALAnnie Lederman12:09

       (laughs)

   30. WCWhitney Cummings12:10

       (laughs) It's like, damn.
7. 21:59 – 54:34

   Magic, pain tolerance, and David Blaine mind games

   1. WCWhitney Cummings21:59

      Let's do a bunch of ketamine and stab ourselves, like David Blaine. (laughs)

   2. ALAnnie Lederman22:02

      (laughs)

   3. JRJoe Rogan22:02

      That's got his cooties on it. It went through his arm. I don't even think we cleaned it.

   4. WCWhitney Cummings22:05

      Good.

   5. ALAnnie Lederman22:06

      Did it really go through his arm?

   6. JRJoe Rogan22:07

      Oh, it f- I pushed it through. I pushed it through his arm.

   7. WCWhitney Cummings22:09

      And then you made you stop for a second?

   8. JRJoe Rogan22:11

      Yeah. We, I hit a nerve the first time, then I had to back out and do it again. I didn't wanna do it. He wanted-

   9. ALAnnie Lederman22:14

      Did the frog live?

   10. JRJoe Rogan22:16

       Yeah, yeah. The frog was fine.

   11. ALAnnie Lederman22:17

       He shit the frog out?

   12. JRJoe Rogan22:18

       He o- threw it up in my hand.

   13. ALAnnie Lederman22:20

       Do you know that there's a book called Eat That Frog! that's like about getting your work done in the morning? (laughs)

   14. WCWhitney Cummings22:24

       (laughs)

   15. ALAnnie Lederman22:24

       It's just funny, he literally eat the, ate the frog.

   16. JRJoe Rogan22:26

       Oh, like eat it and just like get it over with. Just get it done.

   17. ALAnnie Lederman22:27

       Like get the worst part done.

   18. JRJoe Rogan22:29

       Mm-hmm.

   19. WCWhitney Cummings22:29

       Huh. Annie and I have swallowed way weirder things, to be honest.

   20. ALAnnie Lederman22:32

       I know. It's really weird.

   21. JRJoe Rogan22:32

       It's a...

   22. ALAnnie Lederman22:32

       We've swallowed a lot, honestly.

   23. JRJoe Rogan22:33

       That's, that's not even a sharp ice pick.

   24. WCWhitney Cummings22:35

       This is cr- did it make a sound at all?

   25. JRJoe Rogan22:37

       No. It just was like puncturing a steak.

   26. WCWhitney Cummings22:40

       And it wasn't... You picked the spot that you stabbed.

   27. JRJoe Rogan22:42

       Well, he kind of pointed me towards his arm, like what area's a better place to go through. But it was bleeding. I mean, I-

   28. ALAnnie Lederman22:48

       Do you think it would taste like elk?

   29. JRJoe Rogan22:50

       I don't think so. I think people taste like pigs.

   30. ALAnnie Lederman22:52

       Mm.
8. 42:51 – 49:24

   Sex extremes to obscenity law: fisting videos and Florida prosecutions

   1. JRJoe Rogan42:51

      You should see the shit Segura sends me. Jesus Christ.

   2. WCWhitney Cummings42:53

      Okay, good. So he'll get-

   3. JRJoe Rogan42:55

      I played it yesterday for Nikki Glaser. It's this girl fisting herself.

   4. ALAnnie Lederman42:58

      (laughs)

   5. JRJoe Rogan42:58

      But in the most preposterous way, where you're like, "What?"

   6. ALAnnie Lederman43:02

      Well, is there a way that's not preposterous?

   7. WCWhitney Cummings43:03

      (laughs) Yeah.

   8. JRJoe Rogan43:04

      No, no, no, this, this is, this is a different thing.

   9. WCWhitney Cummings43:06

      Uh, is fisting real?

   10. JRJoe Rogan43:08

       Oh, I'll show you.

   11. WCWhitney Cummings43:08

       You can put your entire-

   12. ALAnnie Lederman43:09

       But you know what it is? It's this.

   13. WCWhitney Cummings43:11

       That's right, that's right.

   14. ALAnnie Lederman43:11

       I realize, I don't-

   15. WCWhitney Cummings43:12

       It's putting all your fingers together. It's not like a...

   16. JRJoe Rogan43:14

       Listen to me.

   17. WCWhitney Cummings43:14

       It's not a punch.

   18. ALAnnie Lederman43:15

       You go in.

   19. JRJoe Rogan43:15

       Listen.

   20. ALAnnie Lederman43:15

       Jamie, you've been fisted. Tell us. (laughs)

   21. JRJoe Rogan43:18

       Here you go.

   22. ALAnnie Lederman43:19

       Send your reactions for this video. (laughs)

   23. WCWhitney Cummings43:23

       Oh. Wait, hold on, hold on.

   24. JRJoe Rogan43:27

       (laughs) Your face. "Hold on, hold on."

   25. WCWhitney Cummings43:30

       Oh, my God. It's me. (laughs) Oh, no. This girl just stole your act, Annie.

   26. JRJoe Rogan43:35

       (laughs) Just stole my fisting act. Preposterous is the right word, right? Well, it's gotta hurt. Why are you punching yourself? You have a bruised cervix.

   27. WCWhitney Cummings43:42

       It does kinda look like Christina. (laughs)

   28. JRJoe Rogan43:43

       I don't think it is, but, uh... A bruised ass cervix. Uh, anything that's fucked up like that, Tom Segura will send it to me. It looks like the opposite of having a baby.

   29. WCWhitney Cummings43:50

       I know. (laughs) You guys have the most fucked up shit and I'm like, "I'm so going to jail for this." (laughs)

   30. JRJoe Rogan43:55

       But you're not. I think that's legal. I'm pretty sure that's legal. Yeah.
9. 49:24 – 56:18

   Fear Factor behind-the-scenes: donkey fluids, bull stunts, and contagion puking

   1. ALAnnie Lederman49:24

      Oh, my gosh.

   2. JRJoe Rogan49:24

      Yeah. And I know that because of-

   3. WCWhitney Cummings49:26

      That's someone's job.

   4. ALAnnie Lederman49:27

      ... Fear Factor.

   5. WCWhitney Cummings49:27

      That's someone's job. (laughs)

   6. JRJoe Rogan49:29

      No, because of Fear Factor. We made people drink donkey cum.

   7. ALAnnie Lederman49:31

      Did you ever drink the bad stuff? Did you ever taste it?

   8. JRJoe Rogan49:34

      I didn't drink that, but I ate a bunch of things. I ate a cockroach, a Madagascar giant hissing cockroach. I ate, um, tomato wh-

   9. ALAnnie Lederman49:41

      And it popped in your mouth?

   10. JRJoe Rogan49:42

       Oh, it destroyed... It just was all chewy and-

   11. ALAnnie Lederman49:45

       Did it taste good at all?

   12. JRJoe Rogan49:47

       No, but it didn't taste bad. It's just-

   13. WCWhitney Cummings49:49

       Was it alive?

   14. JRJoe Rogan49:49

       ... it's a mind fuck, yeah.

   15. WCWhitney Cummings49:51

       Dude.

   16. JRJoe Rogan49:51

       It's a mind fuck. It's not... It doesn't taste bad. It's almost like tasteless.

   17. ALAnnie Lederman49:55

       Yeah.

   18. WCWhitney Cummings49:55

       The legs, dude.

   19. JRJoe Rogan49:56

       No big deal.

   20. WCWhitney Cummings49:56

       The legs are what get me.

   21. JRJoe Rogan49:57

       Yeah, but it's basically a lobster.

   22. ALAnnie Lederman49:59

       They're the best part.

   23. JRJoe Rogan49:59

       Like a lobster-

   24. ALAnnie Lederman50:00

       Mm.

   25. JRJoe Rogan50:00

       ... is a bug.

   26. WCWhitney Cummings50:01

       Oh, yeah.

   27. JRJoe Rogan50:01

       It's not much different.

   28. WCWhitney Cummings50:02

       Right.

   29. JRJoe Rogan50:02

       It really isn't. It's all just in your head.

   30. WCWhitney Cummings50:04

       It's psychological-

Episode duration: 3:09:31