Joe Rogan Experience #1563 - Tony Hinchcliffe

Narrator 0:02 (drumming music plays) Joe Rogan podcast. Check it out. The Joe Rogan Experience.

Joe Rogan 0:06 Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night. All day. (rock music plays) Hello, Tony.

Tony Hinchcliffe 0:13 Yeah. Salud, my friend.

Joe Rogan 0:15 Oh.

Tony Hinchcliffe 0:17 Good to see you on the right side of America.

Joe Rogan 0:19 Feels good out here.

Tony Hinchcliffe 0:20 Feels good, right?

Joe Rogan 0:21 Whole different feel.

Tony Hinchcliffe 0:22 Feels normal.

Joe Rogan 0:23 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 0:23 People aren't terrified.

Joe Rogan 0:25 Correct.

Tony Hinchcliffe 0:25 They got everybody scared as fuck in California.

Joe Rogan 0:28 It's horrible, man. Everything's shut down. Everything feels bad.

Tony Hinchcliffe 0:31 (sighs)

Joe Rogan 0:32 It's sad.

Tony Hinchcliffe 0:33 It is sad. It's-

Joe Rogan 0:34 The more, the more businesses are completely closed, the sadder it is. It's seeing stuff that you know.

Tony Hinchcliffe 0:41 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 0:41 And the memories that you have there.

Tony Hinchcliffe 0:43 It's also ... I think it's harder to bounce back in big places. I think it's harder for big places to bounce back, 'cause you get like all these stores closed down. Like all the stores that got hit hard with the looting on Melrose-

Joe Rogan 0:56 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 0:56 ... like they're still closed, right?

Joe Rogan 0:58 Most of them.

Tony Hinchcliffe 0:59 Have any of them come back?

Joe Rogan 0:59 Most of them. Yeah. Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:01 When you drive down M- ... The last time I was there, it's like boarded up, boarded up, boarded up, for lease, for lease, for lease. I'm like, this takes a long time to come back.

Joe Rogan 1:09 It feels that way, for sure.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:11 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 1:11 Some places are open, but i- it's not the same vibe.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:14 Yeah. Out here, they're not interested in shutting things down the same way, especially the governor. He's like, "We gotta keep businesses open." And, and he's right. Like you, you can do it safely. I mean, I think you could do it safely here better than California because there's lower numbers, there's less people.

Joe Rogan 1:28 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:29 There's not ... Just, you know, and everyone's not as smooshed in together and everyone's more relaxed because of that. Like it makes you realize, when you come to a place that has less humans, it makes you realize like, "Oh, that's better." Like there's plenty of people out here. It's not like it- we're in the farms in the country in the middle of nowhere in the mountains. It's not like that.

Joe Rogan 1:46 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:46 It's a city. But it's a l- less populated city and everything's just a little more (sighs)

Joe Rogan 1:52 Yeah, relaxed. LA is a giant county.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:56 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 1:56 It, it, it ... People think it's a city, and it's just a massive, huge place.

Tony Hinchcliffe 2:01 And it smooshes in with Orange County-

Joe Rogan 2:03 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 2:03 ... which is even more populated, right?

Joe Rogan 2:05 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 2:06 I mean, how ... Is A- ar- w- no. Not ... LA's probably more populated than Orange County, but-

Narrator 2:09 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 2:10 Orange County's so dense, though. There's ... The traffic in Orange County on the 405 is mind-blowing. It's mind-blowing.

Joe Rogan 2:16 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 2:17 Like when you're driving down to San Diego and you're just like, "Where are all these people coming from?"

Joe Rogan 2:21 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 2:21 There's so many of them.

Joe Rogan 2:23 And north, too. I went up to Pebble Beach a couple weeks ago and traffic's just crazy. I mean, six lanes.

Tony Hinchcliffe 2:29 You're al- you're all in with the golfing. Look at you.

Joe Rogan 2:30 It's unbelievable.

Tony Hinchcliffe 2:31 You took a trip to Pebble Beach.

Joe Rogan 2:33 I'm telling you, dude. It's the greatest thing.

Narrator 2:35 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 2:35 Outta nowhere. I went to go smoke pot with my buddy, Pete, one day.

Narrator 2:39 (gasps) .

Joe Rogan 2:39 And then, you know, he's like, "Yeah, I'm golfing." I'm like, "Great. I'll smoke pot with you there." I figured I would just drive the cart and have fun. The rest is history. Addicted. I caught myself the other day watching a, a thing on the TV, like golf lessons or whatever, and at the same time, I was on my iPad on YouTube not realizing I was doing two at once, learning how to chip.

Tony Hinchcliffe 3:02 (sighs)

Joe Rogan 3:02 It's so much fun.

Tony Hinchcliffe 3:03 It's very dangerous. It's why I never play it.

Joe Rogan 3:05 Why is it dangerous?

Tony Hinchcliffe 3:06 'Cause it's a suck of time. It sucks time. Not that it's bad. People enjoy it. And, and, and as, as far as like activities that suck time, I mean, at least you're walking around, you're out in nature, you got all that beautiful green grass. You know? There's, there's positives to it.

Joe Rogan 3:22 It's definitely an interesting thing to suck time, because it gives me energy and when I'm away from it, I can think more clearly about everything else. It's like s- it's very meditative.

Tony Hinchcliffe 3:33 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 3:34 You're always thinking about your next shot or your last shot, what you did wrong, what you coulda done better for the next one. So it's like when I'm out there, it's ... I'm not looking at my phone for four or five hours, which is great. I'm not thinking about anything else, so that when I do afterwards. And, you know, normally most days if I don't do that, I sort of like crash out around evening time. But if it's a golf day, even if I'm up at 6:00, 5:00, 7:00 AM, I have energy all day-

Tony Hinchcliffe 4:03 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 4:03 ... all night after that. Those are the best days now.

Tony Hinchcliffe 4:07 Yeah. It's probably like every ... Like archery's like that. It's meditative.

Joe Rogan 4:11 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 4:11 It helps clear your mind, uh, because it's so difficult.

Joe Rogan 4:14 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 4:14 Right? You're concentrating so hard on each individual putt and shot.

Joe Rogan 4:18 Mm-hmm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 4:19 Did I say it right? Putt?

Joe Rogan 4:19 Yeah. Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 4:20 What do you call them? Shots? Drives?

Joe Rogan 4:21 It depends on what you're shooting. The, the drive is from the tee.

Tony Hinchcliffe 4:24 Talk to me about your knowledge.

Joe Rogan 4:24 Yeah, the drive is from the tee. That's the first shot. That's power. Hopefully some accuracy. You're aiming for the middle. Uh-

Tony Hinchcliffe 4:31 Is that the hardest to get good at?

Joe Rogan 4:33 No, putting's the hardest.

Tony Hinchcliffe 4:34 Really?

Joe Rogan 4:35 Yeah, because it's-

Tony Hinchcliffe 4:35 Well, what about miniature golf?

Joe Rogan 4:36 It's all touch. That ... Putting's the most like archery. Miniature golf (laughs) isn't really the same.

Tony Hinchcliffe 4:41 (laughs) It's not.

Joe Rogan 4:42 No, on the golf course there's no windmill to knock it back at you.

Tony Hinchcliffe 4:45 Hey, gotta get it up that ramp. That ramp's narrow.

Joe Rogan 4:48 The ramp?

Tony Hinchcliffe 4:48 Yeah, the ramp-

Joe Rogan 4:49 Oh. (laughs) Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 4:49 ... to get to the, the windmill.

Joe Rogan 4:51 Right. You gotta get it in the clown's mouth-

Narrator 4:53 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 4:53 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 4:53 ... just like at Pebble Beach. (laughs) I'm like, "Excuse me. Where are your clowns?"

Tony Hinchcliffe 4:57 There's no other sport that's worth millions of dollars if you're the best-

Joe Rogan 5:00 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 5:00 ... that also has a miniature version that little kids play.

Joe Rogan 5:04 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 5:04 Right?

Joe Rogan 5:04 Totally.

Tony Hinchcliffe 5:04 Like a fucked up version with all like bumpers everywhere and weird holes and-

Joe Rogan 5:10 It's fun though.

Tony Hinchcliffe 5:11 ... it's on concrete with fucking fake grass over it. Right?

Joe Rogan 5:14 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 5:14 There's no ... I guess there's bumper pool, but pool's not, pool's not nearly as popular as golf in terms of, um, in terms of money, you know?

Joe Rogan 5:23 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 5:24 Like golfers make like-

Narrator 5:25 This is, uh-

Tony Hinchcliffe 5:25 ... legit cash.

Joe Rogan 5:25 Bryson DeChambeau.

Narrator 5:27 He's got a long drive.

Tony Hinchcliffe 5:27 You know who that is?

Joe Rogan 5:28 Powerful driver.

Tony Hinchcliffe 5:29 423 yard drive. That is insanity. That's so far.

Narrator 5:34 And he did this on purpose. So there's like a, a, he, uh, interview recently about him 'cause he's been getting popularity. He like decided to like get jacked to do this.

Joe Rogan 5:41 He hits it 40, 50 yards farther than Tiger Woods ever did.

Tony Hinchcliffe 5:45 Jesus. So he's just decided to get really big.

Narrator 5:47 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 5:47 He looks like a football player.

Narrator 5:49 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 5:50 (coughs) Who's that one dude that does the thing at the driving ranges where he steps his leg up in the air like he's throwing a pitch and then he steps forward and ... And it's crazy torque. He's got this crazy move he does where he lifts his leg up and then he steps into it-

Joe Rogan 6:03 I don't know.

Tony Hinchcliffe 6:04 ... and whacks it. Yeah. He's, uh ... There's videos of him on YouTube. We've-

Joe Rogan 6:07 I-

Tony Hinchcliffe 6:07 ... we've actually talked about him before.

Joe Rogan 6:08 I don't think he's hitting it that far though-... I don't think anybody's hitting at 423. Maybe some-

Tony Hinchcliffe 6:13 Really?

Joe Rogan 6:13 ... weird pro-driver guy, but yeah, this guy's a freak.

Tony Hinchcliffe 6:15 Well, also, this guy's accurate. I mean, he's, if-

Joe Rogan 6:17 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 6:18 He's hitting it exactly in the middle, like look where it lands.

Joe Rogan 6:20 And he just won the Masters, I do believe.

Narrator 6:23 No, that's the, it's going on right now.

Joe Rogan 6:24 Oh.

Narrator 6:24 He won the US Open, I think.

Joe Rogan 6:25 Yeah, the US Open. And, uh, what's crazy about him, so what's crazy about the sport of golf is that that's your first shot. And then after that, touch, as you get closer to the hole, touch becomes so much more important.

Tony Hinchcliffe 6:36 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 6:37 So this guy can do that. And he can also make a 10-foot putt that has a hill from right to left and then bends-

Tony Hinchcliffe 6:43 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 6:43 ... from left to right, like...

Tony Hinchcliffe 6:45 The int- there's a comparison, I guess, to pool, the break shot.

Joe Rogan 6:48 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 6:49 You know, like some guys have crazy break shots, like with a lot of power. And then afterwards, it's a touch and finesse game.

Joe Rogan 6:56 Right. And some guys might get in their head on the eight ball, which is every hole, every putt.

Tony Hinchcliffe 7:00 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 7:00 It's the most frustrating yet rewarding part of the game.

Tony Hinchcliffe 7:03 Also, you guys, you're not playing on flat service. You got like little hills you have to-

Joe Rogan 7:07 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 7:07 ... like look at. You gotta get low and try to figure out where you hit it on the hill to make it drop into the hole.

Joe Rogan 7:11 Yeah. And in the morning, because, uh, the ground's moist, especially in California, they water everything, and then you're just in a desert. So if you start at say, um, 7:00 or 8:00 AM, it's pretty straight. Like there's not a ... And also, it's slower.

Tony Hinchcliffe 7:28 'Cause it's wet.

Joe Rogan 7:29 Right. And by 10:00, 11:00, 12:00, once the heat kicks up, things are moving much faster.

Tony Hinchcliffe 7:35 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 7:35 So you have to adjust throughout the day for a, uh, from slow to fast and all these things. So it change, every hole literally changes as it goes on.

Tony Hinchcliffe 7:43 Yeah. That, that's the same with, uh, pool with moisture. If you're playing in a place that has a lot of moisture, like, uh, some of the best players on Earth come from the Philippines. And what happened is, soldiers, I believe in, uh, the Second World War, brought over to the Philippines pool. They taught them pool. And, uh, they play a lot of pool outside. So they have these, uh, outside areas, like chickens running around and shit, and they're playing pool, like a lot of open air, uh, pool tables. And it's obviously, it's an island, so it's near the ocean. There's probably a lot of humidity in the air. And the tables, uh, they also have this weird thing they do where they pour powder on the rails. So like, they have like baby powder because the tables, see everything gets so slick 'cause it's wet and sweaty and sticky, uh, and moist. So they put, uh, baby powder near the pockets. And they all touch the baby powder on their fingers. And then, you know, the cue runs smoothly through your hand. But then you're always touching the table. So you're putting baby powder all over the table. So the table gets really dirty.

Joe Rogan 8:40 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 8:40 So they're playing on these like dirty, slow, wet tables. And so, they develop these like real fluid strokes because they're so used to having to power the ball around these disgusting tables. Like, not disgusting, but just-

Joe Rogan 8:55 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 8:55 ... you, you would be upset if you played on a table like that in America. You'd say, "Why don't you guys clean the table?" But over there, they don't give a fuck.

Joe Rogan 9:01 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 9:01 Also, they don't give a fuck if there's a bunch of people around the table. So they have these games, and I watch these games, like if you looked at my YouTube feed, you'd fucking laugh 'cause like the suggested videos, the vast majority of them are Filipino pool.

Joe Rogan 9:16 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 9:17 I watch Efren Reyes. If, if you look at Jeff Golling Production, Jeff Golling is a guy who films, it's all, like simple stuff. They film it like with a tripod and a cellphone. And then, uh, they, they just film these pool matches. And people get obsessed with watching Efren Reyes play these young guns in the Philippines. Efren Reyes is probably the greatest pool player of all time, like pretty widely regarded. She liked the Hicks and Gracie of pool. And he's playing these-

Joe Rogan 9:46 He looks like Manny Pacquiao, right?

Tony Hinchcliffe 9:47 Um, Manny Pacquiao's a killer, by the way.

Joe Rogan 9:50 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 9:50 Ma- Manny Pacquiao's a killer pool player.

Joe Rogan 9:52 Really?

Tony Hinchcliffe 9:53 Oh my God.

Joe Rogan 9:54 Wow.

Tony Hinchcliffe 9:54 Like world class. Like Manny Pacquiao could play professional.

Joe Rogan 9:58 Wow.

Tony Hinchcliffe 9:58 Yeah. Yeah. Like he gambles with professionals.

Joe Rogan 10:01 Damn.

Tony Hinchcliffe 10:02 Yeah. My friend Max Eberle, who's a l- you've met Max, I think so.

Joe Rogan 10:05 I think so.

Tony Hinchcliffe 10:05 Max ... I know you have.

Narrator 10:06 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 10:07 He's a legit pro. Like Max is like world champion caliber pro. And he's gambled with Manny Pacquiao.

Narrator 10:14 Wow.

Tony Hinchcliffe 10:14 And he said Manny Pacquiao's good. He says you have to really bear down to beat him. Like, if they play a race to 10, he might beat Manny because Max is world class.

Narrator 10:22 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 10:22 But he might beat Manny like 10 to 7 or 10 to 6.

Joe Rogan 10:25 Wow.

Tony Hinchcliffe 10:26 Whereas he beat Manny like 10 to 1 or 10 to 2.

Narrator 10:28 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 10:28 Like, Manny's much better than me. He's really good.

Joe Rogan 10:30 Manny's better than you at pool?

Tony Hinchcliffe 10:31 Yeah. Yeah. He's legit. There's Manny right there. Yeah, dude, he ... Look at that.

Narrator 10:35 Whoa.

Tony Hinchcliffe 10:35 Look at, look at him kick that ball in, son.

Joe Rogan 10:38 Wow.

Tony Hinchcliffe 10:38 And get position on the six. He's, uh, he's super legit, super legit. And he's got a, a great stroke. And he's also left-handed. I think there's a thing about left-handed people. And I say this as a right-handed person. I think generally they're better at shit. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 10:53 Yep. I agree. My, one of my best golf buddies who helps me get a lot better 'cause he's great, um ...

Tony Hinchcliffe 11:00 Look how good he is. Dude, seriously, look how fucking good he is. He bumped the eight. I don't know if he got position on the five there. He might have fucked that up. But he plays really good.

Narrator 11:10 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 11:11 Like g- like, like I said, if I saw him in a tournament, and I didn't know it was Manny Pacquiao, I'd be like, "Oh, this guy's really good." He's a pro. He's essentially a pro. But that's also because he's from the Philippines. And the F- the Philippine ... Look how good he gets, look, perfect position on the seven. Watch this, seven to the eight, eight to the 10, and he's out. 10 ball, watch this. Pop. If you watch how he, he strokes the ball, like everything's super precise.

Joe Rogan 11:36 Wow.

Tony Hinchcliffe 11:36 I mean, look at this position.

Narrator 11:37 That's crazy.

Tony Hinchcliffe 11:38 He's a professional. Like a, like a legit professional. So if Manny decides to retire from, uh, from fighting and goes, uh, into professional pool, he, he might win some world championships. Like no bullshit. I mean, he's still fighting actively. They're actually talking about him fighting Conor McGregor right now, which is kinda bonkers. Look at that, gets out, beautiful position.

Joe Rogan 11:58 Why do you say it's kinda bonkers?

Tony Hinchcliffe 12:01 Because f-

Joe Rogan 12:01 Because you think Manny would-

Tony Hinchcliffe 12:02 F- fighting Conor McGregor.

Joe Rogan 12:03 ... dominate Conor, right?

Tony Hinchcliffe 12:05 Is that a question?

Joe Rogan 12:07 (laughs) You know, it's-

Tony Hinchcliffe 12:07 You're talking about one of the greatest boxers of all time-

Joe Rogan 12:09 I agree.

Tony Hinchcliffe 12:09 ... against a guy with one professional boxing match.

Joe Rogan 12:11 I agree. And I'm a huge Manny Pacquiao fan.

Tony Hinchcliffe 12:14 But?

Joe Rogan 12:14 But ... (laughs)

Narrator 12:16 Is there a but coming?

Joe Rogan 12:16 There is a but coming.

Tony Hinchcliffe 12:16 I can't believe it.

Joe Rogan 12:18 The other week ...

Tony Hinchcliffe 12:19 Conjunction, conjunction.

Joe Rogan 12:20 ... I re-watched-... McGregor-Mayweather-

Tony Hinchcliffe 12:24 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 12:24 ... since it's been, like, done. I just w- it was on my Showtime app and I wanted to watch some boxing.

Tony Hinchcliffe 12:29 Right.

Joe Rogan 12:29 It popped up and I clicked on it. And I did not remember... I remembered Conor shocking me with how good he did.

Tony Hinchcliffe 12:37 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 12:37 But I did not remember it being as close as it truly was.

Tony Hinchcliffe 12:42 Let me explain something.

Joe Rogan 12:43 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 12:43 The reason why it was close is because Mayweather let him blow his wad.

Joe Rogan 12:48 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 12:48 Just let him... Look, he clipped Mayweather with legit- legit left uppercut early in the fight and I was kind of stunned. I was like, "Wow, that's really legit." Watch this. Here we go. See, what- what Conor... Look at that. If you see it, watch this left uppercut if he s- if he- if-

Narrator 13:04 I don't think they replay that. It's really quick.

Tony Hinchcliffe 13:06 Oh, so let's re- rewind a little bit so just so I can see it because it's really, really good.

Joe Rogan 13:11 I mean, I know-

Tony Hinchcliffe 13:12 Look at that. That left uppercut. Yeah. Yeah. Here's the thing. Mayweather had to figure out Conor's timing because what Conor is, Conor is not a professional boxer. Okay? So because he's not a professional boxer, he's not as, um, efficient and he's gonna get tired easier. Mayweather is one of the greatest, if not the greatest, boxer of all time. I- I say there's a real good argument he's the greatest of all time.

Joe Rogan 13:32 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 13:32 Because he's undefeated, 50 and 0, and really only been hurt by Sugar Shane Mosley and Maidana, two guys-

Joe Rogan 13:39 Mm-hmm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 13:39 ... in- in- in a spectacular career, 50 and 0. And just gets hit less than anybody and he's super smart about how he sets up fights. He sets up... One of the things he does is he talks a mess of shit-

Joe Rogan 13:52 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 13:52 ... and gets everybody wanting to root for him to lose. He'll show you all his Rolls-Royces, he'll show you all his money, he'll show you all his watches. And everybody's like, "He's gonna go broke. He's gonna go broke." But he never does.

Joe Rogan 14:03 Yeah. (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 14:03 He keeps making money. He keeps making money. So because if you look at his style, he's- he's got a brilliant style. His style is take the minimal amount of damage, find your openings, and then establish a game and then dominate.

Joe Rogan 14:19 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 14:19 And that's what he's done to everybody. That's what he did to Manny Pacquiao and their fight and, you know, Manny Pacquiao apparently had a fucked up shoulder, but that's what he did to Ricky Hatton, dominated Ricky Hatton, who at the time was, you know, one of the best in the world and a- a guy that a lot of people were interested in seeing how he would do against Mayweather. And then the second fight with Maidana, you get to see the brilliance of Mayweather because you knew he got clipped in the first fight. So he digested all of Maidana's movements and what he did wrong in the first fight and he came out in the second fight and just put on a clinic. He's the best of all time.

Joe Rogan 14:51 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 14:51 But Conor is a freak. He's an explosive guy. He's so fast and there's no remedy for that.

Joe Rogan 15:00 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 15:01 Other than getting a guy tired. So what Mayweather was doing was boxing with him, but preserving. Being safe, got clipped a couple of times, realized that Conor can punch. Conor could punch. But just drag him into deep water. Drag him in deep water. And that's what a guy like Mayweather will do. He's the most- he's the most intelligent in terms of his overall strategy to preserve his health yet to always win. I mean, he's the most intelligent. He's so good. You know, all the greats have suffered losses and setbacks and... Except him.

Joe Rogan 15:35 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 15:35 Except him.

Joe Rogan 15:36 We don't even know what it's like.

Tony Hinchcliffe 15:37 I mean-

Joe Rogan 15:37 We don't even know how he would recover.

Tony Hinchcliffe 15:39 We know he's had tough fights. He's had some-

Joe Rogan 15:41 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 15:41 ... a couple of tough fights. But, dude, he's so goddamn good. He's so protected. He knows where to be and where not to be. He's so composed. Like, look at that. Look at th- look at that movement. Look how he moves away from everything. So you're- you're punching at air and you're still threatening, but you're not really hitting him and he's making you throw punches. And occasionally you clip him with a shot as he's moving away and he rolls with a lot of shit. So it's real... You got to be a guy like- like Sugar Shane Mosley clipped him, really clipped him, like really hurt him. And he just grabbed ahold of him and held onto him and eventually started kicking Sugar Shane's ass.

Joe Rogan 16:14 Mm-hmm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 16:14 Just took time. He's, uh... If you're a young boxer and you want to know what it's like to be a 41-year-old and still be at the top of your game, you got to be like him or like Bernard Hopkins.

Joe Rogan 16:26 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 16:26 When Bernard Hopkins was at the top of his game, he was older. He was like in his 40s. Like-

Joe Rogan 16:31 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 16:32 He was, I think he was 36 when he beat Felix Trinidad and a lot of people were like, "Bernard's done. It's over. Felix Trinidad, Tito Trinidad is the future." And he lit Felix Trinidad on fire.

Joe Rogan 16:43 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 16:43 And then the same thing with Kelly Pavlik. He lit Kelly Pavlik on fire.

Joe Rogan 16:46 I was just gonna say we have been not expecting that. We were expecting that to be Kelly Pavlik's big, like, return.

Tony Hinchcliffe 16:50 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 16:51 And he got smashed.

Tony Hinchcliffe 16:53 Bernard Hopkins is a national treasure.

Joe Rogan 16:55 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 16:55 He's... Because what he... Look- look at that. Conor pops him with that jab and that was uncomfortable, but it's like he's... Like, look how calm he is.

Narrator 17:03 (laughs) Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 17:03 Stop. Back that up. Back that up a second. Look how goddamn calm he is. Watch this jab come to Floyd's face. He doesn't even blink.

Narrator 17:10 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 17:10 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 17:11 It touches him in the nose, but he knows it's not gonna hurt him.

Joe Rogan 17:14 Smiles like a tickle.

Tony Hinchcliffe 17:14 Look at this. Watch this. Look at this. Look at this. He doesn't even move.

Narrator 17:17 Wow.

Joe Rogan 17:17 Wow.

Tony Hinchcliffe 17:17 He doesn't even move. He's a master of distance.

Joe Rogan 17:20 He really is.

Tony Hinchcliffe 17:21 A master of distance. Bernard was a master of distance too and Bernard was a different kind of style, different kind of defensive style. Bernard, like, would frustrate guys a lot. He'd clinch with him, tie you up, make it very physical. And guys get real frustrated and they didn't know what to do and they just wanted to fucking start winging punches. And then he'd get right in your face again and clench ahold of you, but then break with you and catch you with a left hook, break, catch you with a right hand. Always defensive, always protected, always disciplined. You know?

Joe Rogan 17:49 Frustrating your opponent in boxing is one of the interesting things, right? Like Holyfield-Tyson.

Tony Hinchcliffe 17:54 Oh, yeah.

Joe Rogan 17:54 It's crazy. Everybody remembers the ear bite, but not a lot of people talk about the massive amount of clinching and headbutts that Holyfield was landing on him in that fight.

Tony Hinchcliffe 18:05 Oh, yeah.

Joe Rogan 18:05 It's very clear when you watch it again.

Tony Hinchcliffe 18:08 Well, the headbutts are interesting. It's like the question is, did he do it on purpose? And that's what Tyson was saying that he's doing this on purpose. He's trying to cut me and he's cutting my face and cu- Tyson... And that's when Tyson bit his ear. And Tyson's idea, at the time at least, was that he was doing it on purpose.... you know, but it's also like his style. His style is to get it, put his face, put his head on your f- your chest. You know, put his forehead on your chest and just make it a test of wills. Like, very few m- human beings have the kind of will that Evander Holyfield has. Y- you ever watch the Riddick Bowe fights?

Joe Rogan 18:41 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 18:42 Those are crazy to watch, 'cause Riddick Bowe was way bigger than Holyfield. You gotta remember, Holyfield is a cruiserweight champion. So, Hol- Holyfield, I wanna say he fought light heavyweight in the Olympics. I might be wrong about that. I wanna say he fought at, like, 176 in the Olympics. Find out what he fought at.

Joe Rogan 19:03 I used to have a subscription, when I was a kid, to The Ring magazine.

Tony Hinchcliffe 19:07 Oh, yeah.

Joe Rogan 19:08 It's like-

Tony Hinchcliffe 19:08 The Bible of boxing, son.

Joe Rogan 19:10 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 19:10 They have a lineal heavyweight belt. They give out their own belt. Like, The Ring belt is, is as prestigious as any other belt, WBC, WBO, WBA.

Joe Rogan 19:19 It has the red, white, and blue s- side straps?

Tony Hinchcliffe 19:21 Yeah, it's got, like, crazy ruffles to it.

Joe Rogan 19:23 Yeah. Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 19:23 And like old school.

Joe Rogan 19:25 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 19:25 Looks like something Jack Johnson would have worn.

Joe Rogan 19:26 So cool.

Tony Hinchcliffe 19:27 Oh, it's the coolest. D-

Joe Rogan 19:28 It's weird how, like, cool trophies and stuff sometimes get weird.

Tony Hinchcliffe 19:32 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 19:32 Like, I was thinking about that the other day, about the green jacket for the Masters.

Tony Hinchcliffe 19:36 For the Masters?

Joe Rogan 19:36 They give you a weird ... Of basically-

Tony Hinchcliffe 19:38 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 19:38 ... the ugliest jacket.

Tony Hinchcliffe 19:40 Not just ... Yeah. Yeah, it's just, it's like, it's you're such, such a badass-

Joe Rogan 19:43 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 19:43 ... you can wear a disgusting jacket.

Joe Rogan 19:44 Yeah. (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 19:45 Look at him get-

Joe Rogan 19:45 And you see those guys when they're all together and it's like, "Hey," like they're, like, so happy-

Tony Hinchcliffe 19:50 Right?

Joe Rogan 19:50 ... to be wearing these ugly jackets together.

Tony Hinchcliffe 19:52 Fucking diamonds and Rolexes.

Joe Rogan 19:54 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 19:54 Wearing a gross jacket. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 19:55 Yeah.

Narrator 19:57 It says his first professional fight was at light heavy, but right before that, he was listed around age 21 at 178, which is around the time he was in the Olympics, so ...

Tony Hinchcliffe 20:07 Um-

Narrator 20:08 ... I don't know what that is.

Tony Hinchcliffe 20:08 So, so he probably fought at light heavyweight. So his fir- if his first professional fight was at light heavyweight, and then he went on to be the cruiserweight champion, he beat, uh, Dwight Mohammed Qawi, who used to be Dwight Braxton. Dwight Braxton was this fi- guy who was 5'7", 200 pounds. He was a, a tank. Just a t- And he would come at you, like, real low. He would get in a crouch and guys would be like, "What the fuck?" He'd be like way down here.

Joe Rogan 20:32 Oof.

Tony Hinchcliffe 20:32 And he was just fucking jacked. And he was another guy out of prison, so just tough as shit. L- like Ber- uh, Bernard Hopkins. Bernard Hopkins learned a lot of his discipline by being locked up. He's like, "I never want this to happen to me again." There's a famous story about Bernard leaving prison and one of the, the guards saying, "You'll be back." And he was like, "Not me, bitch."

Joe Rogan 20:53 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 20:54 "I'm Bernard Hopkins, motherfucker. I'm gonna be a world champion and I'm gonna get this o- get this chapter out of my life."

Joe Rogan 21:01 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 21:01 And went on to be one of the most disciplined boxers ever. That's why he was able to compete deep into his 40s. I mean, he lost to Joe Smith, I think he was 51 when he f- lost his final fight. And Joe Smith Jr. is just, just fucking savage, like one of those barbarian construction workers who, uh, still has a full-time job, but still fights at a world-class level.

Joe Rogan 21:20 Scary.

Tony Hinchcliffe 21:21 Savage.

Joe Rogan 21:21 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 21:22 Savage human being.

Narrator 21:23 Did you see the, uh, fighter who had his jaw split?

Tony Hinchcliffe 21:26 (gasps)

Narrator 21:27 And h- and fought for, like, four more rounds with it?

Tony Hinchcliffe 21:29 What?

Narrator 21:30 The bot- the bottom mandible broke in half.

Tony Hinchcliffe 21:32 That happens. It breaks in half right here and it goes up and down.

Joe Rogan 21:34 Oh.

Narrator 21:35 Yeah, check, check this out.

Joe Rogan 21:36 Fuck that.

Tony Hinchcliffe 21:37 Oh, Jesus.

Joe Rogan 21:38 Oh, no.

Tony Hinchcliffe 21:39 Look at, look how it's dropped down.

Narrator 21:41 They said it happened in the second round and they kept fighting.

Tony Hinchcliffe 21:43 And he kept fighting?

Narrator 21:44 He wanted to fight, but they had to, like, tell him, "Hey, your jaw's broken. That's not good."

Joe Rogan 21:48 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 21:49 Well, the prob- Oh, my God, that's so, that's so broken.

Narrator 21:52 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 21:52 The problem is it'll tear all the tissue in there and then it'll never heal right.

Narrator 21:56 Young-

Tony Hinchcliffe 21:56 Oh, my God.

Narrator 21:57 Benjamin Hussein from Australia.

Tony Hinchcliffe 21:59 Who hit him?

Narrator 22:00 Uh ... Ben Mahoney.

Tony Hinchcliffe 22:05 Jesus.

Narrator 22:05 They said it dislo- they thought it just dislodged his mouthpiece and then a bunch of blood started coming out.

Tony Hinchcliffe 22:11 There was a-

Narrator 22:11 But, yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 22:11 ... a woman who had that in an MMA fight.

Narrator 22:14 See if it's just an accident.

Tony Hinchcliffe 22:15 Uh, Kim Couture. She was Randy Couture's wife at the time. And, uh, her jaw did the same thing, dropped down.

Narrator 22:22 You can see it moving in this Instagram video.

Tony Hinchcliffe 22:22 Oh, my God, that is crazy.

Joe Rogan 22:25 No.

Tony Hinchcliffe 22:25 That's crazy. Look at the b- Oh, my God.

Joe Rogan 22:28 No. Ugh.

Tony Hinchcliffe 22:28 Oh, my God.

Joe Rogan 22:31 Good lord. Can you imagine the headache the next day?

Tony Hinchcliffe 22:35 (clears throat) I saw a video of a lion that got kicked by a gazelle and had a broken jaw. That's, that's some hard shit to look at, 'cause you're like, "Ooh, this is not gonna last."

Joe Rogan 22:46 Phew. There's no recovering from that, right?

Tony Hinchcliffe 22:48 Nah. There's no hospitals.

Joe Rogan 22:49 If you're a lion, 'cause you can't eat, right? (laughs) No lion hospitals?

Tony Hinchcliffe 22:52 (laughs) Lions have one shot at getting injured. They get injured once in their life and then it's over.

Joe Rogan 22:59 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 23:00 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 23:00 So how long do you think they last after an injury like that?

Tony Hinchcliffe 23:02 Dead. Dead within a couple weeks. They usually starve to death.

Joe Rogan 23:05 You think a lion-

Tony Hinchcliffe 23:05 How do you not starve to death if you can't eat?

Joe Rogan 23:07 You think the lion keeps thinking, you think they have, like, memories and they're like, "That fucking gazelle. That fucking gazelle." No. There's-

Tony Hinchcliffe 23:12 Nope. I think they hold no grudges.

Joe Rogan 23:14 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 23:15 I think grudges are connected to cognitive function, like our ego, our, our u- understanding of ourself. That's like, "Oh, I'm gonna get him back," 'cause it's like your ego. I don't think animals have an ego. They have, they have a sense of fair, though. Animals have a sense of f- some animals do, at least. Chimps do.

Joe Rogan 23:31 Hm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 23:31 One of the reasons why chimps attack people is 'cause th- if people give something to someone else and they don't give it to them-

Joe Rogan 23:37 Oh.

Tony Hinchcliffe 23:37 ... they have a real sense of fairness.

Joe Rogan 23:39 Wow.

Tony Hinchcliffe 23:40 Yeah, there's a famous story of this guy who had a pet chimp. And then, the thing about chimps is you can keep them when they're young, and then they get older and it's like a man, but a man that's five times stronger than you. And, like, why is he gonna listen to you? He's not gonna listen to you. So, uh, I think he started biting off fingers. It's one of the things that chimps do.

Joe Rogan 23:59 Mm-hmm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 23:59 When chimps get mad at you, they bite off your finger. Yeah, just to let you know they're the boss. Like, they don't give a fuck if you're injured. They have no remorse, right? And they're intelligent. So you have this thing that's not a dog and it's not a person. It's this weird in-between thing. It's an animal, but it's also intelligent. And so when you do something for someone else but you don't do something for them, they get rage. Like horrific rage.

Joe Rogan 24:22 Hm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 24:22 So this guy gets rid of this chimp, brings it to a shelter.... the shelter takes it in. And he goes to visit it every year. And the chimp goes to see him like, "Oh, my friend, I miss you, I miss you. Why can't I come home?" But he can't come home, ever, because he would just take over the house, right? 'Cause he's a grown chimp. Y- ... Like, they don't castrate chimps the way they castrate dogs. Like, you ... When you castrate a dog, like, everybody f- ... It's standard. People think it's good. "Oh, did you get your dog neutered?" "Yeah, I did." They're like, you want your dog to have no testosterone. You want your dog to have no balls. But then it becomes a different thing.

Joe Rogan 24:53 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 24:53 Then it's, like, s- ... Tired and, like, it l- ... Is it, like ... Have you ever t- seen a dog get snipped? I had one of my dogs get snipped a- at, when it was five years old. He was just too aggressive. And so someone talked me into it. And then when I got him snipped, all of a sudden, he was just tired all the time. He was lazy. And I realized, like, oh, he didn't have any testosterone anymore. It's all gone. I'm like, "Wow." Like, so the dog's a different dog now. So you can't do that to chimps. For whatever reason, you can't do that to chimps.

Joe Rogan 25:17 You can't neuter a chimp?

Tony Hinchcliffe 25:18 Mm-mm. So this guy goes to visit the chimp and he brings a birthday cake. "Happy birthday, buddy." And the other chimps w- ... That are in cages right next to him are like, "This motherfucker didn't bring me a cake? I can't believe this shit." So they figure out a way to get out, and they got out and they attacked the man and they tore him apart. They tore his face off. They tore his dick off. They tore his feet off. They, they bit his fingers off. It's one of the most horrific, cruel attacks you'll ever hear of, because they did it to try to take away from him the things he wants and needs. Like, chimps recognize you need your fingers in order to do things.

Joe Rogan 25:52 (gasps)

Tony Hinchcliffe 25:52 You need your face in order to see, you need your dick in order to fuck. So that's the things they go after.

Joe Rogan 25:57 Fucking assholes.

Tony Hinchcliffe 25:58 They don't tr- ... They don't just try to kill you. They try to take away what it means to be a human. So if you try to hide your hands, they'll pull your hands away from m- ... And open them up-

Joe Rogan 26:07 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 26:07 ... and bite them off like crazy, with a rage-filled look in their eye. And they don't communicate with language, so they only have this sense in their head of what's fair and what's not fair, and what you've done to them. So if you do something that makes them jealous, they think immediately you've done some- ... Something bad to them. They don't think that ... "No, no, I just gave my friend a cake." Uh-uh. You made them feel bad, so it's you. You made them feel bad, so they go right after you. It's r- ... It's bu- ... It's like a sort of a ... It's an interesting study, in the way, sometimes, people look at things. Like, we've all been jealous, right? You've been jealous of someone. You see someone who's doing something well and you go, "Oh, I wish I was that guy." But you don't go attack that person. Right? People recognize, like, "It's not his fault that I feel bad that he has this Corvette. I have to just ... Fuck, I just gotta appreciate the guy's hustle. Guy's out there kickin' ass. All right, I gotta get my shit together." But there's a thing that we have initially, wh- ... Especially when they're children, we, we feel angry. Like, you feel upset.

Joe Rogan 27:12 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 27:12 Like, you feel, uh, like you've been shorted, like someone's ... "Oh, why didn't I get that?"

Joe Rogan 27:17 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 27:17 "This is bullshit. He gets it and I don't"? It's a, a fascinating part of humans. And then humans, as we get older and more sophisticated with language, but still carry the same childish emotions, we find reasons to be upset at someone for being successful. We find reasons. "Eat the rich." You know, we find re- ... We just find these weird little ways that we can justify our jealousy or, or our anger, or our d- our disdain for those who are more successful than we. So it's like a ... We, we're coming up with complicated, sophisticated ways to justify these primal behaviors that chimps exhibit in just violent rage. So this guy, it's a famous case, like, this ... You can see the pictures if you wanna see the pictures.

Narrator 28:03 I ... Yeah, I'm, uh-

Joe Rogan 28:03 Of the cake guy?

Tony Hinchcliffe 28:04 Of the guy who got his face ripped apart-

Narrator 28:06 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 28:06 ... and fingers bitten off and-

Joe Rogan 28:07 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 28:07 ... yeah, I mean, he was in the hospital-

Joe Rogan 28:08 I would love to. That sounds great. Did ... Do you think that this guy-

Tony Hinchcliffe 28:11 Folks at home, folks at home, uh, prepare. Don't show it on the screen, 'cause it's rough. But Tony needs to see this.

Joe Rogan 28:17 It's so-

Tony Hinchcliffe 28:18 Before you go give a tramp a cake.

Joe Rogan 28:19 Yeah, I'm not doing that.

Tony Hinchcliffe 28:21 This is-

Joe Rogan 28:21 Oh, wow.

Tony Hinchcliffe 28:22 No nose. See how he bit his nose off?

Joe Rogan 28:24 God.

Tony Hinchcliffe 28:25 Yeah. Look at his face.

Joe Rogan 28:26 Oh, shit.

Tony Hinchcliffe 28:27 Yeah. Look at his-

Narrator 28:28 That was conscious, they said, uh, after this happened.

Tony Hinchcliffe 28:30 Oh yeah, of course. Look at his ... See his right hand? One of the fingers bitten off?

Joe Rogan 28:34 Wow.

Tony Hinchcliffe 28:34 That's what they do. They bite off your fingers. That's the chimp right there. Ch- ... Click on the chimp in the right-hand corner. That's this chimp.

Narrator 28:40 What is ... Come on.

Joe Rogan 28:42 Wow.

Narrator 28:42 What's my picture?

Tony Hinchcliffe 28:43 Oh, what is that picture?

Joe Rogan 28:44 I'm surprised he let him keep his ears.

Tony Hinchcliffe 28:47 Oh, that's the guy's face, Jamie. That's what that is.

Narrator 28:49 Whoa.

Tony Hinchcliffe 28:49 He's got a trach 'cause he can't breathe out of his mouth. Yeah.

Narrator 28:53 Whoa.

Tony Hinchcliffe 28:53 Well, I mean, I don't think that, you know, chimps exactly know the human anatomy all that well, but they know what's important to you. Your face, your fingers.

Joe Rogan 29:02 Fucking hell, dude.

Tony Hinchcliffe 29:03 Tore this guy apart.

Narrator 29:04 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 29:05 So if he would have brought pieces of cake and given them to all the chimps in all the cages, it probably-

Tony Hinchcliffe 29:09 They would all be happy.

Joe Rogan 29:10 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 29:10 Yeah. But they're also angry that he's ... That, that they're captive, so when they get captive ... Look, (sighs) being captive for a chimp is probably a similar feeling, uh, uh, as to what it would be to be captive as a person. Right? If you see a chimp at the zoo and you're, um, you're in this big ... They're in this big containment and they have all these monkey bars and stuff they can hang on, but there's a bunch of people staring at them. Like, all day long, people are staring at you through glass, and there's a ceiling. Right? There's a net over the top so you can't go over the top, and there's fences. And you're just like, "Fuck, every day is boring."

Joe Rogan 29:43 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 29:43 "Nothing happens. Nothing happens every day. There's no lions. There's no, uh, well, no fruit to go pick. There's no places to go, uh, journey to, to explore." Like, chimps travel around, man. They don't just sit in one particular 100-yard area for the rest of their life. And it's not even 100 yards, right? If you go to the LA Zoo, you ever see h- how small that enclosure is?

Joe Rogan 30:04 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 30:04 I went to the LA Zoo once, really high, really high, like, on an edible.

Joe Rogan 30:09 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 30:10 And, uh, I wrote a, a piece on my website, uh, called, uh, The Animal Prison. And I was like ... 'Cause it made me feel ... I could, uh ... 'Cause, you know, when you're really fucking super baked, you're sensitive to everything.

Joe Rogan 30:22 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 30:23 But just ... I, I recognize how dep- ... Instead of thinking about myself and thinking about, you know, "Oh, I'm gonna go to the zoo and see the monkeys," I went there and I immediately felt sadness. I was like, "Oh no, these poor creatures."

Joe Rogan 30:38 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 30:38 Like, "They don't wanna be here." Like, "What are we doing?" Like, "We can't do this." I, I was thinking, like, "I gotta get out of here." (laughs)

Joe Rogan 30:44 It's true. No, you're right. And it's very bizarre. Same thing with SeaWorld. Same thing with all those places.

Tony Hinchcliffe 30:49 Oh, SeaWorld's worse.

Joe Rogan 30:51 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 30:51 'Cause they're as smart as us if not smarter.

Joe Rogan 30:53 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 30:53 We don't kn- we don't even really know how smart orcas are, right? Becau- or dolphins. 'Cause we, we put them in these weird categories, like, how much emails do they send? Um, do they make houses? No. They must be stupid. But they have a cerebral cortex that's 40% larger than ours. We don't know how smart they are. They, they also ... They communicate. They have a weird sophisticated language that we can't decipher. We can't decipher it. We don't know what their language is. They've been able to recognize specific accents. So they know ... There's like, you know, like there's a Southern accent and a Cleveland accent and there's a Chicago accent. Orcas have accents. Like, we can tell just by the sound, "Oh, this is a orca from Alaska," or, "This is a orca from Seattle."

Joe Rogan 31:37 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 31:38 It's crazy.

Joe Rogan 31:39 It's fucking nuts, man.

Tony Hinchcliffe 31:40 Meanwhile, we put them in a swimming pool. A fucking swimming pool.

Joe Rogan 31:44 It's so sad how their fin droops-

Tony Hinchcliffe 31:46 Oh.

Joe Rogan 31:46 ... once they get depressed.

Tony Hinchcliffe 31:48 It's not that they get depressed. They don't use it. It atrophies. It's like an arm that you don't pick anything up with. It just gets limp. You ever break your arm?

Joe Rogan 31:57 Um, no.

Tony Hinchcliffe 31:59 When you break your arm, they put it in a cast and one of the weird things is you get your arm out the cast and it's so little. It's like your arm atrophies.

Joe Rogan 32:05 Mine's always like that (laughs) .

Tony Hinchcliffe 32:07 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 32:07 I always look like I had a broken arm for three years.

Tony Hinchcliffe 32:10 (laughs) .

Joe Rogan 32:10 I did break my leg once. That was fucked up, right?

Tony Hinchcliffe 32:12 Oh, no.

Joe Rogan 32:12 Before wrestling season. Got run over by a car.

Tony Hinchcliffe 32:14 (gasps) .

Joe Rogan 32:15 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 32:15 What happened?

Joe Rogan 32:16 My girlfriend at the time, uh, dropped me off, um, after school (laughs) and, uh, I was getting my backpack out of her trunk, but she forgot that I was behind her car getting a backpack out of her trunk-

Tony Hinchcliffe 32:30 (gasps) .

Joe Rogan 32:30 So she started backing up.

Tony Hinchcliffe 32:31 Your girlfriend backed over you on purpose and now you're justifying it.

Joe Rogan 32:35 Yeah. And I almost made it out of the way. It was the last second. I, I just-

Tony Hinchcliffe 32:38 And then she hit the gas.

Joe Rogan 32:38 ... spinning out of the way.

Tony Hinchcliffe 32:39 Right?

Joe Rogan 32:40 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 32:40 And turned the wheel.

Joe Rogan 32:41 Yep. Cracked my leg into two pieces. A month before my senior year of wrestling started.

Tony Hinchcliffe 32:47 (laughs) Wow.

Joe Rogan 32:47 Big senior year.

Tony Hinchcliffe 32:48 Oh, my God. What's up, Jamie?

Narrator 32:49 I'm sorry to turn this back to this chimpanzee story, but-

Tony Hinchcliffe 32:52 Oh, no.

Narrator 32:52 ... it got ... It's a little bit crazier than you probably like-

Joe Rogan 32:54 Uh-oh.

Narrator 32:55 You probably stopped looking into this.

Tony Hinchcliffe 32:56 Oh, get crazier?

Narrator 32:57 So the guy, he won a lawsuit against West Covina to keep the chimp in the '60s because the judge said the chimp, quote, "Doesn't have the traits of a wild animal and was somewhat better behaved than some people."

Tony Hinchcliffe 33:08 (laughs)

Narrator 33:09 It ... But it like ... Uh, so there was some ... I was reading more about the story. Uh, it ate his tes- ... Excuse me. According to the reports, it ate his testicles also. And there was some report that it ate part of his brain. Like, they cracked open his skull and got a piece of his brain. This chimp was later put into, uh, another holding place, escaped again, in like 2005 or '8 or something. 'Cause this happened ... The original story happened, I don't know what year, 2002 maybe? The people who originally owned the chimp like rented a helicopter to go find it.

Tony Hinchcliffe 33:41 Oh, my God.

Narrator 33:41 There was more lawsuits.

Tony Hinchcliffe 33:42 But that ... But you say that, that he ate his brain. It wasn't that chimp that ate his brain? Wasn't his chimp?

Narrator 33:47 I don't believe so, but this chimp got involved with like ... It says that-

Tony Hinchcliffe 33:50 It's his chimp that got involved?

Narrator 33:52 ... I think that it ... Like, there was a police officer that got into ... Like, when, when it got out one time, it like got into an altercation with the cop.

Tony Hinchcliffe 33:59 Cops, th- there's like 80% of cops, they suck at fighting drunks.

Joe Rogan 34:03 Yeah (laughs) .

Tony Hinchcliffe 34:03 Imagine fighting a chimp. Like, how many videos have you seen of cops trying to pull a guy over and the guy winds up kicking their ass?

Joe Rogan 34:08 Yeah.

Narrator 34:08 Yeah, it said he bit a policeman-

Tony Hinchcliffe 34:08 Happens a lot.

Narrator 34:09 ... and required $250,000 in medical treatment for the policeman.

Tony Hinchcliffe 34:14 Oh, Jesus.

Narrator 34:14 Lori Allred was defending the chimp in court.

Tony Hinchcliffe 34:16 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 34:16 Wow.

Tony Hinchcliffe 34:17 Yeah, like ... (laughs)

Narrator 34:19 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 34:19 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 34:19 I swear to God, like it gets like insane. (laughs) Oh, my God. That's hilarious.

Narrator 34:26 It said the two chimps that bi- bit him the first time didn't have good enough lawyers. This is wh- ... This is like on a lawyer website I'm reading about it.

Joe Rogan 34:31 Get the fuck out of here.

Tony Hinchcliffe 34:31 That is so crazy. The chimps have lawyers. How can a chimp have a lawyer?

Narrator 34:37 Uh, like-

Tony Hinchcliffe 34:38 Dogs, dogs don't get lawyers, right? So if a dog bites you, they just put the dog down.

Joe Rogan 34:41 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 34:41 But if a chimp bites you, they're like, "Hold on."

Joe Rogan 34:43 This chimp sounds so good he almost represented himself in court (laughs) . This guy, escaping from prison eating brains.

Tony Hinchcliffe 34:50 I'm tired of bullshit. I don't think it's the same chimp that ate the brains. I think it's the chimp that attacked the guy and tore his dick off that ate his brains. Um, they do take, take your testicles off. They seem to know that that's where your, your, your cum is stored.

Joe Rogan 35:01 No. Good. That's not good.

Tony Hinchcliffe 35:03 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 35:03 That's not cool. That is not cool.

Tony Hinchcliffe 35:07 It's so crazy. The ... Well, you know one, the one about the lady in Connecticut, right?

Joe Rogan 35:11 Mm-mm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 35:11 No?

Joe Rogan 35:12 No.

Tony Hinchcliffe 35:12 Oh, this one's even freakier. This lady had a giant chimp, like a 200-pounder and it lived with her and slept in her bed.

Joe Rogan 35:19 Oh, wow.

Tony Hinchcliffe 35:20 And, uh, she gave it Xanax and red wine. And, uh, one day, this lady, her friend came over cock-blocking-

Joe Rogan 35:27 Oh, shit.

Tony Hinchcliffe 35:28 ... and this chimp didn't like it, so he tore her apart. He tore a lady apart. Same, same way that he tore that man apart, he tore this lady apart, he tore her face apart. Horrible story. Terrifying story. This lady thought this chimp was like a pet and then she realized like this chimp has no idea what the rules are and you can't tell it what to do, 'cause he was tired of this lady coming around.

Joe Rogan 35:48 And it wasn't the lady that was-

Tony Hinchcliffe 35:49 No.

Joe Rogan 35:49 ... giving him red wine and-

Tony Hinchcliffe 35:50 Mm-mm. No. It was another lady. She's telling her to not give him red wine and not give him Xanax and he's like, "This bitch is cock-blocking."

Joe Rogan 35:58 You think the chimp looked for testicles and was like, "What the fuck?"

Tony Hinchcliffe 36:01 No. He probably knew it was a female. But, um, I don't even know. I'm joking around about the cock-blocking part, but, uh, he ... Whatever reason, didn't like that lady and just decided to tear her apart. You just can't keep them as pets. They're, uh, they're too ... It's so strange. They're animals, for sure.

Joe Rogan 36:18 Have you ever thought about-

Tony Hinchcliffe 36:19 But they're also so close to humans.

Joe Rogan 36:20 Have you thought about getting any wild animals-

Tony Hinchcliffe 36:22 While I'm in Texas?

Joe Rogan 36:23 ... since, since n- now that you're in Texas?

Tony Hinchcliffe 36:25 Funny you should say that.

Joe Rogan 36:26 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 36:26 I have a couple of giraffes on order (laughs) . No.

Joe Rogan 36:30 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 36:30 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 36:30 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 36:30 I would have giraffes as ... I've t- I've had a bit in my act about w- uh, giraffes, you know? About the only animals at the zoo that don't seem bummed out at all are giraffes, 'cause they're just like, "Another day with no lions."

Joe Rogan 36:43 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 36:43 They just stroll around. They're so happy. They're so calm at the zoo that they let babies feed them. Like, when my daughter was two, I brought her to the zoo. She holds out a piece of lettuce and the giraffe come over. It's a giraffe. They didn't train it. And his tongue reaches out and grabs ahold of the lezza- the, the lettuce. It's really kinda cool the way they do it.

Joe Rogan 37:00 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 37:01 But that's the only animal that I would keep as a pet because they don't seem to care. They seem to like it. Like, th- they're stress free. They just chill.

Joe Rogan 37:08 I held a koala when in Australia this last time, so I went with the whole Kill Tony crew. So like, I'm like, "Okay, I'll do the touristy stuff that I've never done there," in the seven or eight or whatever times I'd been there. And we went and held koalas and they feed them eucalyptus the whole time.

Tony Hinchcliffe 37:23 That's all they eat.

Joe Rogan 37:24 And the reason w- why (laughs) they keep feeding them eucalyptus is because the second you stop giving them eucalyptus, like truly within three seconds of them not having the next leaf, they turn more into a bear. Like, it's like they start acting. Instead of being this mellow little bundle of joy, you feel their claws tighten up and they get... Y- you just, you feel it. It's a fucking bear.

Tony Hinchcliffe 37:48 They get angry.

Joe Rogan 37:48 They're all... They're like cute and, and slow and dumb and then as soon as they r-... It's a straight up drug, like it's an IV drip of just heroin to them.

Tony Hinchcliffe 37:58 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 37:58 And if they come off, they're just...

Tony Hinchcliffe 38:00 Is there another animal like that, that only eats one plant?

Joe Rogan 38:04 I don't know.

Tony Hinchcliffe 38:05 That's a good question, right? I mean, cows eat grass, sheep eat grass. But they just eat eucalyptus.

Joe Rogan 38:12 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 38:12 Like one weird plant.

Joe Rogan 38:14 They smell like it. It's strong.

Tony Hinchcliffe 38:16 Oh.

Joe Rogan 38:16 Oh, yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 38:17 I wonder what they taste like?

Joe Rogan 38:18 That's a good question. Let's do it.

Tony Hinchcliffe 38:20 If they get real cunty with you, would you cook one?

Joe Rogan 38:22 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 38:23 You felt like a little aggression from them, right?

Joe Rogan 38:25 Oh, absolutely, I'd put it down.

Tony Hinchcliffe 38:26 Yeah. "Where's my fucking leaves?"

Joe Rogan 38:27 Yep.

Tony Hinchcliffe 38:27 "Where's my fucking leaves?"

Joe Rogan 38:28 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 38:29 Like a fake baby.

Joe Rogan 38:30 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 38:30 If it was a real ti-... Do you... You remember that story about a girl that this, this couple adopted and they thought they were adopting like a 10-year-old and it turned out to be a tiny person?

Joe Rogan 38:40 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 38:40 And a tiny person who's completely insane and was pretending to be a little kid?

Joe Rogan 38:44 Oh.

Tony Hinchcliffe 38:45 Do you know that story?

Joe Rogan 38:46 Scary. No.

Tony Hinchcliffe 38:47 Do you know the story? It's a terrifying story, 'cause this couple had this like little tiny person in the, in their house that was like Chucky, that wanted to kill them.

Joe Rogan 38:55 (sighs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 38:56 And like, and then they realize like, oh, this lady's 30. Right here. "Ukrainian orphan at the center of an adoption scandal might be an adult. Here are eight adults who were caught posing as children."

Narrator 39:05 It's happened that many times.

Joe Rogan 39:07 Fuck.

Tony Hinchcliffe 39:07 Yeah. So look at that. Imagine that's a 30-year-old playing with your baby and you're like, "Oh, we're gonna help her. She's gonna have a better life." Meanwhile, she's doing heroin when you're not around.

Joe Rogan 39:17 Whoa.

Tony Hinchcliffe 39:19 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 39:20 That might be the scariest thing ever.

Tony Hinchcliffe 39:20 These are the different stories... These are the different stories.

Narrator 39:23 Yeah, this one's about her.

Tony Hinchcliffe 39:24 Okay. C- cli- click on that one.

Narrator 39:25 This is the family that got... Wow! Come on.

Tony Hinchcliffe 39:25 Parent... Oh. Oh, come on, you fucking pop-up. Oh, you son of a bitch. "Looks like you're using an ad blocker. We're here to cock-block your ad blocker." (laughs) Um.

Narrator 39:37 It's in your computer.

Tony Hinchcliffe 39:37 That's hilarious. Why don't you just shut off the ad blocker? I don't mind ads.

Narrator 39:41 I did, I did, I did.

Tony Hinchcliffe 39:41 All right. "Parents who are acute..." "Parents who are accused of abandoning an eight-year-old Ukrainian girl say the adopted..." Oh, "they adopted say she was actually a 22-year-old mentally disturbed adult." (laughs) Look at the parents. Like, uh, it's a movie. It's a Coen brothers movie, right?

Joe Rogan 39:55 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 39:55 Like th- those two winding up in jail. (mimics gavel) "Well, it all started when we tried to do a good thing and adopt a baby."

Joe Rogan 40:03 Yep.

Tony Hinchcliffe 40:04 You know? "Daryl's balls didn't work, so he decided..."

Joe Rogan 40:10 Fuck.

Tony Hinchcliffe 40:10 Crazy, right?

Joe Rogan 40:11 That's frightening.

Tony Hinchcliffe 40:12 Hold on a second. Scroll back up again. We just... Yeah. "Christine Barnett says Natalia terrorized her family. In an interview with The Daily Mail, a trusted source, Christine Barnett, said that the adoption was a scam and that the girl was not who they thought she was. Christine Barnett said that she and her now ex-husband..." Oh, they got divorced over this.

Narrator 40:31 Mm-hmm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 40:31 "... agreed to an emergency adoption in Florida in 2010. She said she didn't know how ma- many details about Natalia's background, but we're t- told her previous adoptive parents gave her up for undisclosed reasons." Like maybe 'cause she's 20? "Christine Barnett (laughs) said that Natalia terrorized her family, tried to stab them when they were sleeping, and once tried to push her towards an electric fence and poured bleach in her coffee."

Joe Rogan 40:54 Oh, there you go. Get rid of the coronavirus.

Tony Hinchcliffe 40:56 "'The media is (laughs) painting me to be a child abuser, but there's no child here,' she said. Natalia was a woman. She had periods!"

Joe Rogan 41:03 Whoa!

Tony Hinchcliffe 41:04 "She had adult teeth. She never grew a single inch." (laughs)

Joe Rogan 41:08 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 41:09 "Which would be... would happen even with a child with dwarfism. The doctors all confirmed she was suffering from a severe psychological illness only diagnosed in adults."

Joe Rogan 41:21 That's scary.

Tony Hinchcliffe 41:21 "Natalia has a type of dwarfism called..." Whoa. How about this word? Help me out. "Spondyloepiphe... phasil?" How do you say that?

Narrator 41:33 Close.

Joe Rogan 41:33 Spondylodipepasil.

Tony Hinchcliffe 41:35 Okay. "Dysplasia, which me- makes her age difficult to actually record without a birth certificate." Wow! "Though she was said to be six when the Barnetts adopted her in 2010, NBC News said it saw hospital records showing her age as about eight in June of 2010." Oh. Well, that doesn't mean anything. Okay. "Citing court documents, WISH-TV, an Indianapolis CW affiliate, reported that the girl's age was changed from eight to 22 in 2012 and said a skeletal survey at the Peyton Manning..." Holler at Peyton Manning. Has his own children's hospital. "Peyton Manning Children's Hospital deemed her to be 11 at the time." Wow! She was 22, with a 22-year-old skeleton when she was 11. Wow! While she made a career perpetuating her age facade. Scroll back up.

Joe Rogan 42:25 It's weird that they did the test at a children's hospital.

Tony Hinchcliffe 42:28 Wow! "Natalia was an adult. The document hasn't been verified, but says that she made a career of perpe- perpetu- perpetuating..." That's a weird word. How often do you say that? "Perpetuating."

Joe Rogan 42:38 Perpetuating.

Tony Hinchcliffe 42:38 "Her age faci-" I don't say that very often. I read it a lot. Uh, "continued to fool those who had the best intentions." That's crazy. Where is she now?

Joe Rogan 42:48 I mean, being a kid is pretty awesome.

Narrator 42:50 Look her up.

Joe Rogan 42:50 You don't have to work. You get free food. You're chilling.

Tony Hinchcliffe 42:53 You get to stab people while they're sleeping.

Joe Rogan 42:55 Cozy bed. Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 42:57 They think you're a little kid, you just go take a nap.

Joe Rogan 42:58 That's freaky, man.

Tony Hinchcliffe 42:59 Oh, that's scary.

Joe Rogan 42:59 Imagine you adopt an eight-year-old and you keep like, "All right. Let's check your height." And you do a little pencil mark on the door.

Tony Hinchcliffe 43:05 You couldn't even make that movie 'cause people say that you were being an ableist. You could make that movie about 10 years ago.... but if you try to make that movie today, people will call you a piece of shit. Like, the studios wouldn't fund it. They'd be scared of the backlash.

Joe Rogan 43:17 It's so sad what's going on with movies.

Tony Hinchcliffe 43:18 You're making fun of little people. Dude-

Joe Rogan 43:19 I s- I saw some stat the other day about how they're doing remakes and like-

Tony Hinchcliffe 43:23 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 43:23 ... there's no original anything anymore.

Tony Hinchcliffe 43:24 They're taking stuff out of movies.

Joe Rogan 43:26 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 43:27 I saw, um, Poltergeist the other day.

Joe Rogan 43:29 Hey, I almost went to the drive-in last week and saw that.

Tony Hinchcliffe 43:32 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 43:32 That was playing at a local, uh, drive-in.

Tony Hinchcliffe 43:34 I haven't seen it in forever.

Joe Rogan 43:35 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 43:35 Like, I, I, I didn't remember so much of it. I, it's probably been 20+ years since I saw it. But one thing I recognized when I saw, I was like, the times were so different when that movie came out. I wanna say that movie's... It's like, it's eight, wait. It was like '84 or some shit? Like, what, when do you think that came out? (clears throat)

Joe Rogan 43:55 I guess '82.

Narrator 43:56 Yeah, uh, uh-

Joe Rogan 43:56 Could be.

Narrator 43:57 ... you forgot the rest of the story. She got adopted again, and went on and did more interviews and said that like, she was 16, not 33. The girl on the thing.

Tony Hinchcliffe 44:05 Uh-huh.

Narrator 44:05 You wanna see a picture of her on the thing?

Joe Rogan 44:07 Oh, come on.

Tony Hinchcliffe 44:07 That's her now? Oh my God. Oh my God, she looks like she's 40. That's her?

Narrator 44:11 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 44:12 That's the little girl?

Narrator 44:12 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 44:12 She totally looks like an adult. "Natalia Grace Barnett, I'm 16, not a thirty, 33-year-old scam artist." Oh, that, she's old. Look at her face. That's not true. Look at her face. Go back up to that face. That is not a 16-year-old's face.

Joe Rogan 44:26 Mm-mm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 44:27 That's a woman's face.

Joe Rogan 44:28 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 44:29 That's crazy. But look how small her hands are in, in relationship to the rest of her face too.

Joe Rogan 44:34 If I adopted an eight-year-old and that's what showed up at my door, I'd immediate, immediate return.

Tony Hinchcliffe 44:40 But I think when she was 20, she pulled it off. Like if you saw that other picture of her, the other picture of her, she looked young.

Joe Rogan 44:46 Wow. Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 44:46 She looked like a little kid. But she doesn't look like a little k- You know, from 20 to 33, she does not look the same. That's crazy. Um...

Narrator 44:56 I thought we had like, even watched it or something, and like, we heard her talk or...

Tony Hinchcliffe 44:59 Did we?

Narrator 45:00 I don't, like, I remember j- It was all like, flashing back.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:03 Dude, I have...

Narrator 45:04 There's a lot.

Joe Rogan 45:04 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:04 There's, uh, I was, uh, on my YouTube feed watching Filipino Pool the other day.

Joe Rogan 45:08 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:08 And an old interview came up with us with someone I didn't even remember was a guest. Like, if you had said, "Has this guy been a guest?" I'd be like, "No, never heard of him." Meanwhile, I sat down with the guy for three hours doing a podcast. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 45:13 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 Like, my memory's turned to dog shit. It's like there's too many, too many people in there. There's too many. It's like overwhelmed. I have no room. I have no, uh, hard drive space.

Joe Rogan 45:13 Yeah, you gotta get rid of the old and new. It's like when you find an old joke. That ever happen to you?

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 Oh, yeah.

Joe Rogan 45:13 It's the best feeling.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 It's crazy. It's like, "I wrote this in 1998?"

Joe Rogan 45:13 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 Look at that.

Joe Rogan 45:13 Like, I was-

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 There's something in there.

Joe Rogan 45:13 ... like I was telling you, uh, Ron White's doing a guest spot on this show I'm doing tonight here in Austin. And, uh, he's going back, looking over his stuff. And, uh, today he was. I was hanging with him and, uh, at one point he goes, "You know what? This shit's pretty goddamn funny." (laughs)

Narrator 45:13 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 45:13 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 That's Ron.

Joe Rogan 45:13 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 What were we talking about? I talked-

Narrator 45:13 Poltergeist.

Joe Rogan 45:13 Poltergeist. Poltergeist. Oh, here's what. The movie, I think, is... What, w- what year is it, '83?

Narrator 45:13 '82.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 '82, okay. So the movie is in the early '80s. And, uh, apparently it was okay to be a piece of shit back then. It was like, super normal 'cause like, there's a scene where the 16-year-old daughter goes outside and there's just people doing construction in their backyard. And I mean, like, the window's right there, the parents are right there. And these construction workers are like, "Yay, look at you." And the guy's got like a, like a tube and he's looking at her through a tu- like a toi- like a paper towel tube. And he's looking at her like, "Yeah, I love you. I love it." She's like, "Fuck you." And the wife, the mom is laughing that her daughter almost got raped. It, it is the craziest scene. Like, look at this. Look at him. He's looking at her like, "Yeah, look at you." (laughing) "I love you."

Narrator 45:13 Sounds, sounds terrible.

Joe Rogan 45:13 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 And look at this, "Wha- huh?" And she's like, "Fuck you." She gave him the, this fuck you. This is like the, it's a soft finger.

Joe Rogan 45:13 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 It's a lot more motion.

Narrator 45:13 Oh.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 Like, you have to use your arms. But the wife-

Narrator 45:13 The mom, yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 You're making fun of little people.

Joe Rogan 45:13 That's... I s- I saw some stat the other day about how they're doing remakes and like-

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 Dude.

Joe Rogan 45:13 ... there's no original anything anymore.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 They're taking stuff out of movies.

Joe Rogan 45:13 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 I saw, um, Poltergeist the other day.

Joe Rogan 45:13 Hey, I almost went to the drive-in last week and saw that.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 45:13 That was playing at a local, uh, drive-in.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 I haven't seen it in forever.

Joe Rogan 45:13 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 I kinda, I, I didn't remember so much of it. I, it's probably been 20+ years since I saw it. But one thing I recognized when I saw, I was like, the times were so different when that movie came out. I wanna say that movie's... It's like, it's eight, wait. It was like '84 or some shit? Like, what, when do you think that came out (clears throat)

Joe Rogan 45:13 I guess '82.

Narrator 45:13 Yeah, I, I, um-

Joe Rogan 45:13 Could be.

Narrator 45:13 ... you forgot the rest of the story. She got adopted again and went on and did more interviews and said that like, she was 16, not 33. The girl on the thing.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 Uh-huh.

Narrator 45:13 You wanna see a picture of her on the thing?

Joe Rogan 45:13 Oh, come on.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 That's her name... Oh my God. Oh my God, she looks like she's 40. That's her?

Narrator 45:13 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 That's the little girl?

Narrator 45:13 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 She totally looks like an adult. "Natalia Grace Barnett, I'm 16, not a thirty, 33-year-old scam artist." Oh, that, she's old. Look at her face. That's not true. Look at her face. Go back up to that face. That is not a 16-year-old's face.

Joe Rogan 45:13 Mm-mm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 That's a woman's face.

Narrator 45:13 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 That's crazy. But look how small her hands are in, in relationship to the rest of her face too.

Joe Rogan 45:13 If I adopted an eight-year-old and that's what showed up at my door, I'd immediate, immediate return.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 But I think when she was 20, she pulled it off. Like, have you saw that other picture of her? The other picture of her, she looked young.

Joe Rogan 45:13 Wow. Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:13 She looked like a little kid. But she doesn't look like a little k- You know, from 20 to 33, she does not look the same. That's crazy. Um...

Narrator 45:15 I thought we had like, even watched it or something that like, we heard her talk or...

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:15 Did we?

Narrator 45:15 I don't, like, I remember j- It was all like, flashing back.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:15 Dude, I have...

Narrator 45:15 There's a lot.

Joe Rogan 45:15 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:15 There's, I, I was, uh, on my YouTube feed watching Filipino Pool the other day.

Narrator 45:15 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 45:15 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:15 And an old interview came up with us with someone I didn't even remember was a guest. Like, if you had said, "Has this guy been a guest?" I'd be like, "No, never heard of him." Meanwhile, I sat down with the guy for three hours doing a podcast. (laughs) Like, my memory's turned to dog shit. It's like there's too many, too many people in there. There's too many. It's like overwhelmed. I have no room. I have no, uh, hard drive space.

Joe Rogan 45:30 Yeah, you gotta get rid of the old and new. It's like when you find an old joke. That ever happen to you?

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:34 Oh, yeah.

Joe Rogan 45:35 It's the best feeling.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:36 It's crazy. It's like, "I wrote this in 1998?"

Joe Rogan 45:39 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:40 Look at that.

Joe Rogan 45:40 Like I was-

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:40 There's something in there.

Joe Rogan 45:41 ... like I was telling you, uh, Ron White's doing a guest spot on this show I'm doing tonight here in Austin. And, uh, he's going back, looking over his stuff. And, uh, today he was. I was hanging with him. And, uh, at one point he goes, "You know what? This shit's pretty goddamn funny." (laughs)

Narrator 45:59 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 45:59 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 45:59 (laughs)

Narrator 45:59 That's Ron.

Joe Rogan 46:00 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 46:01 What were we talking about? I talked-

Narrator 46:03 Poltergeist.

Joe Rogan 46:03 Poltergeist.

Tony Hinchcliffe 46:04 Poltergeist. Oh, here's what. The movie, I think, is... What w- what year is it, '83?

Narrator 46:09 '82.

Tony Hinchcliffe 46:09 '82, okay. So the movie is in the early '80s and, uh, apparently it was okay to be a piece of shit back then. It was like, super normal 'cause like, there's a scene where this 16-year-old daughter goes outside and there's just people doing construction in their backyard. And I mean, like, the window's right there, the parents are right there. And these construction workers are like, "Yay, look at you." And the guy's got like a, like a tube and he's looking at her through a tu- like a toi- like a paper towel tube. And he's looking at her like, "Yeah, I love you. I love it." She's like, "Fuck you." And the wife, the mom is laughing that her daughter almost got raped. It, it is the craziest scene. Like, look at this. Look at him. He's looking at her like, "Yeah, look at you." (laughing) "I love you."

Narrator 46:53 That's terrible.

Joe Rogan 46:53 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 46:54 And look at this, "What, huh?" And she's like, "Fuck you." She gave him the, this fuck you. This is like the, it's a soft finger.

Joe Rogan 47:04 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 47:04 It's a lot more emotion.

Narrator 47:05 Oh.

Tony Hinchcliffe 47:05 Like, you have to use your arms. But the wife-

Narrator 47:07 The mom, yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 47:08 You're making fun of little people.

Joe Rogan 47:45 That's... I s- I saw some stat the other day about how they're doing remakes and like-

Tony Hinchcliffe 48:04 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 48:08 ... there's no original anything anymore.

Tony Hinchcliffe 48:12 They're taking stuff out of movies. I saw, um, Poltergeist the other day.

Joe Rogan 48:28 Hey, I almost went to the drive-in last week and saw that.

Tony Hinchcliffe 48:58 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 48:58 The film was playing at a local drive-in.

Tony Hinchcliffe 49:02 I haven't seen it in forever.

Joe Rogan 49:05 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 49:05 I kinda, I, I didn't remember so much of it. Uh, it's probably been 20+ years since I saw it. But one thing I recognized when I saw, I was like, the times were so different when that movie came out. I wanna say that movie's... It's like, it's eight, wait. It was like '84 or some shit? Like, what, when do you think that came out (clears throat)

Joe Rogan 49:12 I guess '82.

Narrator 49:12 Yeah, I, I, um-

Joe Rogan 49:12 Could be.

Narrator 49:12 ... you forgot the rest of the story. She got adopted again and went on, did more interviews and said that like, she was 16, not 33. The girl on the thing.

Tony Hinchcliffe 49:12 Uh-huh.

Narrator 49:12 You wanna see a picture of her on the thing?

Joe Rogan 49:12 Oh, come on.

Tony Hinchcliffe 49:12 That's her name... Oh my God. Oh my God, she looks like she's 40. That's her?

Narrator 49:16 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 49:16 That's the little girl?

Joe Rogan 49:16 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 49:16 She totally looks like an adult. "Natalia Grace Barnett, I'm 16, not a thirty, 33-year-old scam artist." Oh, that, she's old. Look at her face. That's not true. Look at her face. Go back up to that face. That is not a 16-year-old's face.

Joe Rogan 49:17 Mm-mm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 49:17 That's a woman's face.

Narrator 49:17 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 49:17 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 49:17 That's crazy. But look how small her hands are in, in relationship to the rest of her face too.

Joe Rogan 49:17 If I adopted an eight-year-old and that's what showed up at my door, I'd immediate, immediate return.

Tony Hinchcliffe 49:17 But I think when she was 20, she pulled it off. Like, have you saw that otherCarol Anne Freeling was the young point of the series, played by Heather O'Rourke. Only six years old when the first Poltergeist film was released, O'Rourke captivated audience. Doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo. She was misdiagnosed with Crohn's disease in 1987. The following year, O'Rourke fell ill again, and her symptoms were casually attributed to the flu. A day later, she collapsed and suffered a cardiac arrest. After being airlifted to a children's hospital in San Diego, O'Rourke died during the operation to correct a bowel obstruction. It was later believed that she had been suffering from a congenital intestinal abnormality. Oh. So she had, um-

Joe Rogan 49:55 Bu- yeah. Basically, she was bleeding.

Tony Hinchcliffe 49:58 But that was just something she was born with.

Joe Rogan 50:00 On the inside.

Tony Hinchcliffe 50:01 Um, so here's another one. Dominique Dunne, who played the original older sister... Oh, that was the girl with the- who gave up the finger.

Joe Rogan 50:07 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 50:07 Equally tragic and unforeseen fate, '82, uh, Dunne separated from her partner, John Sweeney. November of that year, he showed up at Dunne's house pleading for her to take him back. When she refused, Sweeney grabbed Dunne's neck, choked her until she was unconscious, and left her to die. Fuck. He was sentenced to six and a half years in prison but was released after three years and seven months.

Joe Rogan 50:29 Geez.

Tony Hinchcliffe 50:29 Oh my God, if that was my daughter.

Joe Rogan 50:31 My God, I'd have-

Tony Hinchcliffe 50:32 Could you imagine? Your daugh- like, three years is not that long, okay? Here we are in 2020. Three years ago? 2016 and a half, or not even, 'cause we're halfway in, right? More than halfway in. We're towards the end. Summer. Summer of 2017. What? And all of a sudden, this guy's out who choked your daughter to death?

Joe Rogan 50:50 I know chimps have been in prison more than that guy.

Tony Hinchcliffe 50:52 They should be. They should put him in with the chimp. That's what they should do.

Joe Rogan 50:55 Ah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 50:55 Yeah, you choke a woman to death, they put you in with a chimp, and they make you feed the other chimp the birthday cake.

Joe Rogan 51:00 It's also interesting how they wrote that, "Choked her until she was unconscious and then left her to die."

Tony Hinchcliffe 51:05 Left her to... No, you mean killed her?

Joe Rogan 51:06 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 51:07 Yeah, what the fuck are you talking about?

Joe Rogan 51:08 Yeah, choked her to death.

Tony Hinchcliffe 51:09 Yeah, choked her to death. Whoever wrote that-

Joe Rogan 51:12 Yeah, is that the guy that wro-

Tony Hinchcliffe 51:13 ... probably meant choked it would have worked.

Joe Rogan 51:13 Is that the guy that wrote it? (laughs) Anyway, uh, left her to die accidentally. (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 51:17 Whoops. Yeah, maybe he's just really into choking. Have you ever been with a girl that- that wants to get choked?

Joe Rogan 51:22 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 51:23 Weird, right?

Joe Rogan 51:24 Yeah, I'm not into it.

Tony Hinchcliffe 51:26 Not into it.

Joe Rogan 51:26 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 51:27 I don't wanna let that fucking genie out of the bottle.

Joe Rogan 51:29 Mm-mm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 51:29 Last thing you wanna do is be really into choking.

Joe Rogan 51:31 Right. No.

Tony Hinchcliffe 51:32 You know? It's like being really into feet.

Joe Rogan 51:35 Yep, weird.

Tony Hinchcliffe 51:36 But way worse, because it could lead to death.

Joe Rogan 51:39 (laughs) Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 51:40 'Cause like (laughs) , if you're really into feet and then you date a normal girl, and you're like, "Oh, you know, I'd like to, uh, you know, with your feet," she's like, "What?" Like, for a lot of gals, that would be, like, a deal breaker. Looking for a husband, looking for a man to take care of your children, looking for a person to be responsible. You don't want a guy who wants to beat off on your feet.

Joe Rogan 51:57 Mm-mm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 51:57 Right?

Joe Rogan 51:58 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 51:58 So, for a guy who's really into feet, and then he breaks up with his woman and tries to get a new one, it's like, "Mm, f- feet thing's kind of important."

Joe Rogan 52:07 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 52:09 (laughs) But that's... But at least that's not dangerous. It's just creepy.

Joe Rogan 52:12 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 52:13 But for someone who's into choking people, well, he's gotta be real careful to test those waters.

Joe Rogan 52:18 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 52:18 You know? Like, if you were with a girl and that... Like, you- you had a crazy relationship for 10 years, all you did is fuck and choke each other. And you're like, "Damn, that's what I miss. I miss choking and fucking."

Joe Rogan 52:29 Holding's fun. Grabbing's fun. Grabbing by the throat's fun.

Tony Hinchcliffe 52:33 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 52:33 Applying pressure isn't fun. It's not fun.

Tony Hinchcliffe 52:37 Grabbing is fun? (laughs)

Joe Rogan 52:38 You ever- You ever been with a girl that... And you're hooking up and she says, "Hit me"?

Tony Hinchcliffe 52:41 No. Have you?

Joe Rogan 52:42 Really.

Tony Hinchcliffe 52:43 Have you? Really?

Joe Rogan 52:43 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 52:44 Whoa.

Joe Rogan 52:45 And I go... It stopped everything. You know, "Whoa, what do you mean?"

Tony Hinchcliffe 52:48 Like a record skip?

Joe Rogan 52:49 (laughs) What do you... Yeah. What do...

Tony Hinchcliffe 52:50 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 52:50 What do you mean? And then she goes, "Slap me." And I'm like-

Tony Hinchcliffe 52:53 (inhales through teeth)

Joe Rogan 52:53 ... "Okay, that's different."

Tony Hinchcliffe 52:55 Woo.

Joe Rogan 52:55 That's different than hit.

Tony Hinchcliffe 52:57 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 52:57 Because hit (slaps thigh) and slap are two very different things.

Tony Hinchcliffe 53:01 Yeah, but they're still hitting.

Joe Rogan 53:03 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 53:03 'Cause if you use-

Joe Rogan 53:03 Slapping's weird.

Tony Hinchcliffe 53:04 If- if you slap a woman and she calls the cops, the cops will say you hit her, it's assault.

Narrator 53:08 Stomped and slapped.

Tony Hinchcliffe 53:10 I think that's-

Narrator 53:10 Different kind of thing.

Tony Hinchcliffe 53:10 They do that in a fight. Um, spitting in someone's face is assault. There's a, there's this crazy video of this woman screaming in this cop's face in New York. She's like, "You fucking fascist," and he's just standing there taking... And she spits in his face, and he's like, "Oh, okay. Time to arrest you." And he grabs her, and she's screaming, "What are you doing? Why are you touching me?" S- spitting is assault. If you're gonna spit in someone's face, you might as well kick them in the balls.

Joe Rogan 53:34 Absolutely. That is the, "We are fighting."

Tony Hinchcliffe 53:37 Yeah, it's a fight.

Joe Rogan 53:38 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 53:39 You spit in someone's face, it's-

Joe Rogan 53:40 It's straight punches.

Tony Hinchcliffe 53:41 ... it's like... Yeah.

Joe Rogan 53:41 You might as well have just gotten a sucker punch in.

Tony Hinchcliffe 53:43 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 53:44 Should have just thrown the punch. That's the, that's the...

Tony Hinchcliffe 53:46 It's assault.

Joe Rogan 53:46 Is there anything worse than that? Is there anything worse than spitting in another human's face?

Tony Hinchcliffe 53:50 Well, the only difference is you spit at someone, you know you're not gonna kill them. But if you hit someone, you really could kill them. If you hit someone, you knock them out, and they fall and hit their head on the concrete, they could die. That really can happen. The- so there's a dif- I don't think it's the same assault. It's just n- it's fucking gross. It's mean. It's definitely... Like, f- you- you're basically as close to starting a fight as you can without hitting a person. But if you're gonna have a scale of, like, murder down to spitting in the face, like, there's, there's a difference in what you're doing. You know? You're certainly provoking someone to extreme violence. If you spit in someone's face, you don't leave them a lot of options.

Joe Rogan 54:27 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 54:27 Especially if they have a, a temper. Like, most people you spit in their face, they're gonna throw.

Joe Rogan 54:32 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 54:32 But if you hit someone and they fall and they die, it's not the same thing as spitting in someone's face. Believe me, you're gonna go to jail for a long time. Unless you get the judge that gave the guy three years for choking a girl to death-

Joe Rogan 54:44 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 54:45 ... in 1982. But it's like, I'm telling you, the world was a different place back then. Like, women are right. How- how about that? Like, I know a lot of these feminists went crazy, and, uh, some of them went way over the edge to the point where they actually don't like men, but they are right. If you watch, watch movies like that-

Joe Rogan 55:03 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 55:03 ... and you see a woman who got choked to death, and the guy only got three years, and she was a movie star.

Joe Rogan 55:08 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 55:09 She was in Poltergeist and she got to- choked to death, and the guy still only got three and a half years.

Joe Rogan 55:14 Crazy.

Tony Hinchcliffe 55:14 Dude, being a woman for most of history h- must have been fucking terrifying. For most of history.

Joe Rogan 55:22 And that-

Tony Hinchcliffe 55:22 Still terrifying. But for most of history?... like you, you hook up with a guy, you gotta really worry about this guy killing you.

Joe Rogan 55:29 Mm-hmm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 55:29 It's probably not gonna happen one out of a hundred times, but one out of a hundred is like-

Joe Rogan 55:35 Yeah, like who's that chick that died while hanging out with Christopher Walken and whoever?

Tony Hinchcliffe 55:39 Huh?

Joe Rogan 55:40 Yeah, the girl that was, uh, murdered, um-

Tony Hinchcliffe 55:44 How come you haven't had anything to drink, pussy?

Joe Rogan 55:46 ... Jack Wagner, is that a, is that a name?

Tony Hinchcliffe 55:46 How come you haven't had anything to drink?

Joe Rogan 55:48 This is like pure diesel fuel.

Tony Hinchcliffe 55:51 Texas whiskey.

Joe Rogan 55:52 Is that what this is?

Tony Hinchcliffe 55:53 Cheers. (glasses clinking)

Joe Rogan 55:53 I don't know. I need California pussy whiskey.

Tony Hinchcliffe 55:56 Well, there's a bunch of those stories, like, uh, Natalie Wood.

Joe Rogan 56:00 Is that it? That's the one, right?

Tony Hinchcliffe 56:02 She drowned on a boat.

Joe Rogan 56:03 Christopher Walken was there.

Tony Hinchcliffe 56:04 Robert Wagner, I think was, um, the one who people were, uh, pointing the finger at.

Joe Rogan 56:09 But Christopher Walken, I think was like hanging out. They're like all in the boat or something. "I was there." (laughs) "Not paying attention." Seems weird that he just-

Tony Hinchcliffe 56:17 "Here I am, on a boat."

Joe Rogan 56:19 Seems like he would be-

Tony Hinchcliffe 56:21 Yeah. Natalie Wood's death, Christopher Walken breaks his silence. "Oh, they were arguing?" It's true. I watched, um, him the other day and I just, I just watched the preview of, um, that movie where he can see the future? He holds people's hands. What is it called? Dead Zone? Is that what it is?

Joe Rogan 56:40 I don't know.

Tony Hinchcliffe 56:41 Stephen King book. I think it's The Dead Zone.

Joe Rogan 56:43 Mm-hmm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 56:43 Yeah. That was wild. He was so young, baby-faced. And there was a guy in it who was, uh, played by Michael Sheen, who was, uh, gonna be the president, a crazy egomaniac president, and he wanted to, uh, detonate nukes. Wanted to start a nuclear war. Christopher Walken could see the future. There he is. He died and came back to life, and when he came back to life, he could see the future when he touched your hand. Like he holds your hand-

Joe Rogan 57:10 Damn.

Tony Hinchcliffe 57:10 ... and he can see what's gonna happen to you.

Joe Rogan 57:11 What a badass. Look at young Christopher Walken. Look at that fucking guy.

Tony Hinchcliffe 57:15 Oh, he's great.

Joe Rogan 57:16 Wow.

Tony Hinchcliffe 57:16 He's, uh, he's been great forever. Him and Harvey Keitel. They don't get enough-

Joe Rogan 57:20 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 57:20 ... enough love. Christopher Walken's been in so many great movies, man. What's that vampire movie? Scroll down.

Joe Rogan 57:27 I'm just scrolling up on this. I don't know.

Tony Hinchcliffe 57:28 What's that? What is that? What the fuck is that movie? Seven-

Joe Rogan 57:32 Sleepy Hollow.

Tony Hinchcliffe 57:33 Sleepy Hollow. Oh, wow. No shit. I don't remember that at all. There's too many movies.

Joe Rogan 57:42 Tim Burton. Uh, just watched, uh, Beetlejuice for the first time in a while.

Tony Hinchcliffe 57:47 Oh, it's a classic.

Joe Rogan 57:48 God, it's so good.

Tony Hinchcliffe 57:50 My family and I, we watched Nightmare Before Halloween, or Nightmare Before Christmas.

Joe Rogan 57:53 Nightmare Before Christmas. Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 57:53 Watch that every year.

Joe Rogan 57:54 That's great.

Tony Hinchcliffe 57:55 It's fucking fantastic.

Joe Rogan 57:57 And it's incredible. While watching Beetlejuice, I was thinking about what we were talking about earlier, about how y- what executive would make that today? Not knowing that it's a hit, you know?

Tony Hinchcliffe 58:07 Oh. Never.

Joe Rogan 58:07 Like, just like, okay, so there, there's this couple that dies, and they're like, "Okay, well, at least they're not a likable couple," right? No, super, super likable couple. They die within the first five minutes of the film.

Tony Hinchcliffe 58:21 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 58:21 And then they go back to their h- there's, uh, a couple the ones that the people wanna buy the house after they die, they take over the house. It's basically a creepy movie about real estate and them not listening to the leader of purgatory that tells them to do anything but say, "Beetlejuice" three times, but they do. The exec would be like, "What are you talking about?"

Tony Hinchcliffe 58:43 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 58:43 "Get out of here." Beetlejuice? Okay, pal. Great. Yeah, we'll let you know.

Tony Hinchcliffe 58:49 You know what I watched again, uh, recently? Coraline. Did you ever see that?

Joe Rogan 58:53 Mm-mm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 58:54 I think that's Tim Burton as well. 99% sure. It's amazing. It's really good. It's really creepy, animated, like, so-

Joe Rogan 59:03 It's not.

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:03 No?

Joe Rogan 59:03 Nope.

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:03 It's not?

Joe Rogan 59:03 Nope.

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:03 Who is it? It's not Tim Burton?

Joe Rogan 59:05 Henry Selick. I don't know.

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:08 Tim Burton's not involved at all?

Joe Rogan 59:09 I'll double checking to make sure he didn't like produce it or something, but ...

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:12 Why don't you check Snopes?

Joe Rogan 59:14 You know what else I watched the other day?

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:16 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 59:16 How dare you?

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:18 We've been going back and forth about Snopes.

Joe Rogan 59:20 What's Snopes? What do you mean?

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:21 Exactly.

Joe Rogan 59:24 Watched Kingpin the other day.

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:25 Oh, that's a great movie.

Joe Rogan 59:26 Unbelievable.

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:28 Oh, fairly bet- probably their most underrated movie.

Joe Rogan 59:31 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:31 You know?

Joe Rogan 59:31 Oh, yeah. For sure.

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:32 It's so good.

Joe Rogan 59:34 And what I realized watching it this time-

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:36 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 59:36 ... is that-

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:37 Damn it.

Joe Rogan 59:39 Bill Murray plays the bad guy.

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:41 Oh, yeah.

Joe Rogan 59:42 And-

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:42 With his crazy hair?

Joe Rogan 59:43 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:43 The circular hair?

Joe Rogan 59:44 And, and he, he's a hilarious bad guy, and Woody Harrelson plays the good guy, and Woody Harrelson, a great dramatic actor. And Bill Murray's the silliest guy of all time.

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:55 Yeah. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 59:56 And it just works perfectly.

Tony Hinchcliffe 59:58 It's, it's an amazing movie. And it's an amazing movie about bowling.

Joe Rogan 1:00:02 Yup.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:00:02 Yeah. Bill, Bill Murray's... He's great as a bad guy. He was a bad guy in Groundhog Day-

Joe Rogan 1:00:07 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:00:07 ... who's a bad guy that became a good guy by the end of the movie.

Joe Rogan 1:00:10 He's a great golfer.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:00:11 Look at... Bill Murray's here next to Donald Trump's hair. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 1:00:15 (laughs)

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:00:15 Who wore it better? (laughs)

Joe Rogan 1:00:16 Mm-hmm. You should see Bill Murray out on the golf course.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:00:20 Ah.

Joe Rogan 1:00:20 He's so funny, man. He does, he's really silly out there. Like, he, I saw a video of him, uh, uh, he called over the guy with a microphone. You know how you hear golf shots when they happen?

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:00:32 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 1:00:32 The guy that holds like that thing? And he called him over. He said, "Come over here. Get closer. I want you to hear this fucking bomb I'm about to hit," or something like that. And the guy gets closer and he sets up again and he goes, "Closer." And he goes, "Closer," and the guy gets right up on it and he does this big back swing and he slams the hell out of this ball, man, and it sounds, it sounded like fucking heaven when he hit it, 'cause the guy's right on it. (laughs) He had to-

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:00:56 Whack.

Joe Rogan 1:00:56 ... be right next to it. He can play.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:00:59 Oh, I heard, I heard he's like a pro.

Joe Rogan 1:01:00 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:01:00 Yeah. Do you, do you see it anywhere? Tim Burton? Coraline? Does no- nothing, never-

Joe Rogan 1:01:05 Uh, the, it came up that people were asking about like he didn't direct or produce it.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:01:08 Wow.

Joe Rogan 1:01:08 'Cause it came out the same time or a similar time as the other thing-

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:01:11 It looks like one of his movies. That's what's crazy. I assumed he had did it 'cause it's so, uh, Tim Burton like. You know? It's, but it's probably someone who's a fan. Does like similar weird, absurd, strange, creepy-

Joe Rogan 1:01:23 I think he worked, I think that guy worked with Tim Burton. Here's an article that says he stepped out of the shadow to make Coraline.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:01:28 Oh, there it is.

Joe Rogan 1:01:29 So maybe he's like a protege.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:01:30 Oh, okay.Interesting. D- Burton didn't produce or direct it. Interesting.

Narrator 1:01:35 Neil Diamond book.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:01:36 Just like Nightmare from... Oh, okay, cool. Well, he nailed it. Whoever that gentleman is. It's really good. It's just, uh, a strange movie about these people that move into this house and it's all animated. And this little girl finds this door that's been sealed off. Like, this little tiny, like, you know, two-foot door. She's like, "What the fuck is this?" But it's been covered in wallpaper and she finds a key for it and she opens it up and it, it has a tunnel and she goes through it and finds a version of her family that's way nicer than her family. But they have buttons for eyes. Like, the mom is, like, doting. Like, her parents are writers and all they're doing is like, "We have to work. Get out of here. I'm trying to work." And they're like, they're not into hanging out with the kid and so she's bored and she's... And it's rainy and shitty and then she goes through this weird tunnel and all the people over there are mirrors of her parents, but much nicer. All they're into is her. They care about is her and her wishes. And they give her the most delicious food and they're with her all the time, but they want her to have button eyes and they want her to stay there forever. And then eventually she realizes, like, "Something's really fucking wrong here."

Joe Rogan 1:02:44 Mm-hmm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:02:44 And she's going back and forth between the two worlds. It's really cool. So whenever you have kids, Tony-

Joe Rogan 1:02:50 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:02:50 ... whenever you shoot a live one into the old lady-

Joe Rogan 1:02:52 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:02:53 ... and you, you make a little baby kid, a little baby Tony.

Joe Rogan 1:02:56 A little baby kid.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:02:56 Make them watch Coraline.

Joe Rogan 1:02:58 Okay.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:03:00 Say, "It could be worse, you little fuck."

Joe Rogan 1:03:01 It's a g-

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:03:01 "Look, this lady wants to sew buttons into your eyeballs."

Joe Rogan 1:03:05 Sounds scary.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:03:06 It's a g- it's a cool movie.

Joe Rogan 1:03:07 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:03:07 And they, they get creepier and creepier as the movie goes on. The parents get progressively weirder and creepier. Like, they... It's a nice slow burn. Like, they start off real sweet, spoiler alert, and they keep getting weirder and weirder.

Joe Rogan 1:03:21 Edward Scissorhands turns into a Christmas movie at the end.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:03:25 Does it?

Joe Rogan 1:03:26 Yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:03:27 I don't think I ever watched that.

Joe Rogan 1:03:28 It's a good one. That-

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:03:29 Are you sure?

Joe Rogan 1:03:30 That's a fun one to watch.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:03:32 How many movies has Johnny Depp been in?

Joe Rogan 1:03:33 A lot.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:03:33 Jesus Christ. They booted him out of this m- new movie because he lost a lawsuit. You see that?

Joe Rogan 1:03:39 Yeah. Crazy.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:03:41 Did you see the r- hear the recordings where she's admitting to hitting him? She's admitting to punching him.

Joe Rogan 1:03:46 Yeah. I guess the judge is just insane on this case.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:03:51 Well, it was a... It was a civil suit, right? Where he was suing a tabloid for, um, describing him in a inaccurate manner, or describing his life in a... And then he lost that suit and because he lost that suit... I wonder if it's, like, just the optics of him losing that suit, so the, the studio has to step in and, and get rid of him.

Joe Rogan 1:04:15 Right.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:04:16 Is that what it is?

Joe Rogan 1:04:17 I think so. That's just what they do nowadays. They're like, "Okay, you're not working. Not working."

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:04:22 (sighs) I think they still have to pay him, though. I think that's also part of the thing. He still gets an eight-figure paycheck. (imitates cash register ringing)

Joe Rogan 1:04:31 Sweeet. Heck yeah.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:04:32 And he gets to stay home.

Joe Rogan 1:04:33 Beautiful.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:04:34 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 1:04:34 Doesn't have to do the press releases, doesn't have to walk the red carpet. He gets to just be Johnny Depp out there.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:04:40 Wouldn't it be nice if it just... The, the, the, they, he doesn't do the movie, but that money just pays her off? Like, "Get out."

Joe Rogan 1:04:48 Yep.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:04:49 "Stop. Leave me alone." I don't think she gets any money anymore. I think he's suing her now.

Joe Rogan 1:04:54 Mm-hmm.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:04:54 I think that's what's happening.

Joe Rogan 1:04:56 You know who's a badass? Jeff Bezos.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:05:00 How so?

Joe Rogan 1:05:00 Got a divorce, made his ex immediately the richest woman of all time. You know, immediately she became that.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:05:08 Wow.

Joe Rogan 1:05:08 $36 billion, the richest woman of all time, won it all in a divorce. And then right after that, which was 2019, he goes and he doubles or triples his overall wealth. So, he got out right before making her twice over the richest l- woman of all time. So, she got $36 billion or whatever instead of $72 which she would have gotten a year later once the pandemic hit.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:05:37 That probably pisses some women off that the way the richest women get to be the richest women is through divorce.

Joe Rogan 1:05:42 Yup.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:05:43 There's probably a lot of women right now that just don't even wanna fucking hear that shit.

Joe Rogan 1:05:46 Yup. They're like, "Don't... Can we just not mention that to the-"

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:05:48 Just stop it.

Joe Rogan 1:05:49 "Richest woman of all time."

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:05:51 "We're tryna, you know, we're here kicking ass."

Joe Rogan 1:05:53 Yup. She did it by getting cheated on.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:05:56 Um, did she? I think they were already broken up. Do you want a cigar? I know you do.

Narrator 1:06:00 She's number 22 on the list overall as of September.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:06:04 Yeah, shut your mouth.

Narrator 1:06:05 I mean, a lot of the money was in stock.

Joe Rogan 1:06:06 Of richest people?

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:06:07 Shut your mouth.

Narrator 1:06:07 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 1:06:07 Right, so she's the richest w-

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:06:09 Richest woman in the world.

Joe Rogan 1:06:10 22 a- for women?

Narrator 1:06:11 Of all people.

Joe Rogan 1:06:12 Right, of all people.

Narrator 1:06:13 Yeah, yeah.

Joe Rogan 1:06:13 She's the richest woman, though.

Narrator 1:06:14 Yeah, but she's... Oh yeah, but some of it was in stock.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:06:16 Why are you splitting hairs, Jamie?

Narrator 1:06:17 Oh, I'm not. No, I'm just saying she still fucking got some of that money too.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:06:20 Seems like, yeah.

Narrator 1:06:20 Like, she didn't, she didn't smoke.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:06:21 Did you find... Did you read that on Smokes?

Joe Rogan 1:06:22 (clears throat)

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:06:24 She got fucked? (laughs)

Narrator 1:06:25 She did not get fucked with that same money.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:06:26 Oh. No, she made, she made like $35 billion, right? Didn't she?

Narrator 1:06:30 Yeah, yeah, but I was saying, like, bec- the point was that st- it wa- he got her out before the, all the stock went up. Like, she just went up with, with the stock also.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:06:37 He knew. He knew what was coming.

Narrator 1:06:38 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 1:06:40 He probably did.

Narrator 1:06:42 Probably did.

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:06:43 He probably did. It's probably... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Here you go. $35? $35 billion? Okay.

Joe Rogan 1:06:47 Yeah.

Narrator 1:06:47 Yeah, see at the time of the divorce-

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:06:48 With a big smile on his face. Yeah.

Narrator 1:06:49 ... she was the third wealthiest-

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:06:50 Okay.

Narrator 1:06:50 ... woman in the world and now she's the most we-