Skip to content
The Joe Rogan ExperienceThe Joe Rogan Experience

Joe Rogan Experience #1667 - Annie Lederman

Annie Lederman is a standup comedian, host of the "Meanspiration" podcast, and look for her new merch at AnnieLederman.com

Joe RoganhostAnnie LedermanguestJamie Vernonguest
Jun 27, 20243h 1mWatch on YouTube ↗

EVERY SPOKEN WORD

  1. 0:003:17

    Matching shirts, midriff confidence, and Jamie’s long-hair “intervention”

    1. JR

      (drumming) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.

    2. NA

      The Joe Rogan Experience.

    3. JR

      Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. (rock music) What are the odds that you and I are wearing the same shirt?

    4. AL

      It's so weird. And it's a shirt I drew and I'm putting up on my website to sell.

    5. JR

      Yeah, I just don't have the midriff show.

    6. AL

      (laughs)

    7. JR

      Did you trim that yourself?

    8. AL

      Well, I should have, I did trim it myself. I cut all my shirts.

    9. JR

      Wow. All of them?

    10. AL

      Yeah. I had a girl come up to me who was very skinny, who goes, "You've really given me, like, a lot of inspiration, like, how you'll just wear a midriff no matter what." And I was like, "Oh my God, bitch." (laughs)

    11. JR

      What does, what does that mean? (laughs) What else?

    12. AL

      I was like, I was like, but yeah, I like to ... I'm loud and proud muffin topping around this town, baby.

    13. JR

      Wow, you don't give a fuck.

    14. AL

      No.

    15. JR

      Good for you.

    16. AL

      I like cropping it. I think they land weird. I have hips, you know, so they land-

    17. JR

      Mm-hmm.

    18. AL

      ... weird on my hips. They get tight on my hips, so I just crop that bitch.

    19. JR

      Huh.

    20. AL

      Wear it, hoist my, my sweatpants up high. I-

    21. JR

      Which is what you wear most of the time, right?

    22. AL

      Yes. When I came to Austin last time, by the way, nobody warned me.

    23. JR

      About?

    24. AL

      About the fucking swamp ass situation here.

    25. JR

      (laughs)

    26. AL

      I was wearing, I was wearing sweatpants. All I have is sweatpants. I, listen, I, I gained a little weight over COVID, loud and proud, I don't give a shit. But, I'm, I refuse to buy new clothes, so I'm a size four till the seams pop.

    27. JR

      I don't know what that is. Is that a lot?

    28. AL

      Like, a size four is like-

    29. JR

      What's Jamie?

    30. AL

      Jamie, if he was a girl, would be a size like eight.

  2. 3:174:59

    Pandemic weight gain, pho obsession, and LA vs. Austin food culture

    1. AL

      It also... I'm happy, listen, I gained weight because I wasn't giving a fucking shit over this damn pandemic, so.

    2. JR

      Well, I think it's 'cause you ate a lot of food.

    3. AL

      I did eat a lot of food.

    4. JR

      I'm thinking that ain't good too.

    5. AL

      I was... You know, I was eating a lot of noodles.

    6. JR

      Ah, that'll do it.

    7. AL

      I got into... My boyfriend is, um, half Asian. I got into a lot of the, the cuisine.

    8. JR

      Ah. What kind of food?

    9. AL

      A lot of pho.

    10. JR

      Oh.

    11. AL

      I mean, he actually didn't, it was just me.

    12. JR

      I like how you said it right.

    13. AL

      Pho? Of course.

    14. JR

      Most people are all pho.

    15. AL

      I know. But pho does sound upsetting. It took me many years to-

    16. JR

      It's weird. I don't say it.

    17. AL

      ... to say it correct.

    18. JR

      I never said it.

    19. AL

      What do you say? You say foe?

    20. JR

      I mean, I just don't say it.

    21. AL

      You just say, "Can I have those noodles?"

    22. JR

      I wait for my family to want to order it.

    23. AL

      (laughs)

    24. JR

      And then I go, "Yeah, we'll eat that."

    25. AL

      (laughs)

    26. JR

      My kids love it. They're like, "Pho."

    27. AL

      But I, I always thought like it's rice, it's not like regular noodles, so you kinda convince yourself. But then, you know, it's about this much.

    28. JR

      Fucking big ass bowls of stuff.

    29. AL

      Yeah.

    30. JR

      There's a great place in Woodland Hills we used to go to. Oh my God, it was sensational.

  3. 4:596:28

    Austin barbecue deep dive: Terry Black’s lines, pit tours, and brisket craft

    1. AL

      Yeah, I've only eaten, I went to, what was the barbecue place I went to?

    2. JR

      Did you have Terry Black's?

    3. AL

      Yes, I went to Terry Black's. That was the first place I went to, it was-

    4. JR

      You don't need to go anywhere else.

    5. AL

      It was so good.

    6. JR

      Everywhere else, there's places that are as good, like Franklin's and La Barbecue, and there's some killer places, but they don't get better.

    7. AL

      It-

    8. JR

      It's not possible.

    9. AL

      Yeah. It was great.

    10. JR

      It's possible.

    11. AL

      It was so good. It was fast, it was easy.

    12. JR

      Yeah, you do, go through the, uh...

    13. AL

      Mm-hmm.

    14. JR

      But we fucked it up by talking about it too much.

    15. AL

      Said I was okay.

    16. JR

      'Cause they were there as a giant ass fucking line.

    17. AL

      Well, I, when I went there, there, it seemed like a really big line. The parking lot was full and it still went fast, so I was like, "All right."

    18. JR

      Well, it's a cafeteria style.

    19. AL

      Yeah.

    20. JR

      And they're on the ball, chop, chop, chop.

    21. AL

      Do you do cafeteria when you go?

    22. JR

      Yeah, you gotta.

    23. AL

      Are people like hovering around you?

    24. JR

      You can... Sometimes when it's too crazy, they'll, they'll just bring us over what we want. But yeah, I like going in line.

    25. AL

      Yeah.

    26. JR

      I like doing the thing.

    27. AL

      I didn't get to do a pit tour, I like doing the pit tour.

    28. JR

      Oh, the pit tours the shit. They make their pits themselves. They use propane tanks.

    29. AL

      That's cool.

    30. JR

      They have someone weld them and shit.

  4. 6:287:53

    Bone marrow, ‘Fear Factor’ mental games, and old-school stunt comedy stories

    1. AL

      Really good. All the different sauces. I went there. I went to another place that had, like, tapas. I had some bone marrow, which I've decided I hate. I never have d- been able to decide whether I'm disgusted by bone marrow or I like it. I hate it. (laughs)

    2. JR

      Bone marrow on garlic bread at a restaurant in town called Red Ash is fucking sensational.

    3. AL

      (laughs)

    4. JR

      Don't you laugh. I'm telling you-

    5. AL

      I'm not laughing. I'm just saying it's one of those things, it feels like I'm on Fear Factor, honestly.

    6. JR

      Feels like a trauma?

    7. AL

      Every time I eat it, I'm like, "It's mental. It's mental. It's mental." I'm smearing that shit. I'm scraping it off the bone, which y- you're not gonna eat it when it's not on the bone. Y- Yeah, it has to come out on the bone.

    8. JR

      Right.

    9. AL

      So, you can't pretend it's not coming from where it's coming from.

    10. JR

      Right. Yeah, that's true.

    11. AL

      And it's just that-

    12. JR

      And you wanna get it clean, like, right when it comes outta the oven, too.

    13. AL

      Mm-hmm. Yeah, when it's still, like ... And I, and I take a couple bites and I go, "I think I like this," and then I'm, like, kinda gagging.

    14. JR

      Yeah. I don't think it's everybody's thing.

    15. AL

      Yeah. I've tried. I'll try again.

    16. JR

      I love it.

    17. AL

      I like to try things. Like, if anyone brings me any weird thing, I like to try it. I used to, before I knew you, I used to, um, pretend I was on Fear F- I'd be like-

    18. JR

      (laughs)

    19. AL

      I'd, like, take a thing and be like, "All right." (laughs) "Take a bite." (laughs)

    20. JR

      Here we go.

    21. AL

      Here we go. I watched an episode recently. I told you that, right?

    22. JR

      Did you?

    23. AL

      Yeah.

    24. JR

      Yeah? So-

    25. AL

      I watched, like, a couples episode. It was like Couples Championships, they came back, and you had married a couple. You had gotten ... You were ordained and married this couple.

    26. JR

      Yeah. They were, uh, from Dallas.

    27. AL

      Yeah?

    28. JR

      Nice folks.

    29. AL

      (laughs)

    30. JR

      Wonder if they're still together.

  5. 7:5311:03

    Marriage as an institution: weddings, vows, and comedian-level cringe tolerance

    1. AL

      I mean, I hope they're still together, but y- you know, with these marriage rates, I, I, I can't.

    2. JR

      Well, what is it? Like, it's not even 50%, I don't think, right? That make it?

    3. AL

      I don't know. Are people even getting married anymore?

    4. JR

      No, they quit. Everybody quit. (laughs)

    5. AL

      They did? (laughs)

    6. JR

      Yeah, people get married. I think that it's gonna be around forever.

    7. AL

      Yeah.

    8. JR

      I don't, I don't think they're gonna stop getting married. You know, when, when people have children and you want to protect and keep everything together-

    9. AL

      Mm-hmm.

    10. JR

      ... and l- lock it down, that's when it makes sense, you know?

    11. AL

      Yeah.

    12. JR

      It seems like a crazy institution, though, you know, like, getting other people involved in your relationship.

    13. AL

      Well, the wedding is so weird 'cause the wedding is like, you're calling all of your, your closest family and friends to, like, like, hold you accountable for this promise you made. Like, everyone's there, like, "You promised. You promised."

    14. JR

      Is that what it is? I thought it was, like, to celebrate.

    15. AL

      (laughs)

    16. JR

      Listen to how you look at it. You look at it in a terrible way. (laughs)

    17. AL

      I guess I feel, like, really embarrassed, like, sharing, like, my deepest heart in front of everyone. I don't know, that seems, like, very vulnerable.

    18. JR

      Your deepest heart?

    19. AL

      Well, if I'm, like, up there and I'm like, "You complete me," or whatever I'm saying-

    20. JR

      Mm-hmm.

    21. AL

      ... that I mean, but I don't know. I guess it's ... I feel different. I feel like I'm growing.

    22. JR

      We did a non-religious wedding, and the lady was very nice, but she had the corniest fucking vows that sh- You know the thing that they do?

    23. AL

      Yeah.

    24. JR

      "Your love is two streams that will become a mighty river."

    25. AL

      (laughs)

    26. JR

      I'm like, "Oh, my God."

    27. AL

      (laughs)

    28. JR

      Like, as a comedian-

    29. AL

      (laughs)

    30. JR

      ... you know, like, to sit there and listen to that and not mock it?

  6. 11:0312:44

    Heat in the studio and sweating on stage: bombing signals, makeup, and discomfort

    1. AL

      ... how cool it is that there's shooting stars in your fucking sky?

    2. JR

      That's pretty dope, right? Y- How cool is it that it's 180 degrees in this room?

    3. AL

      I'm sweating so much.

    4. JR

      Sweating.

    5. AL

      I'm so glad I chose black shirts.

    6. JR

      Yeah. Something happened to our AC over the last couple days, apparently.

    7. AL

      You'd think a guy with a ponytail would really wanna keep it cool in here.

    8. JR

      I know. That's what I'm saying. I think that's the guy- It's not his- ... who made it. He has a ponytail, too. Yeah. He has a ponytail, too. So, don't blame me. That's true.

    9. AL

      (laughs)

    10. JR

      Well, i- it's not even his fault. It's obviously one of our units is fucking up, but that's a common thing here. We were at the Creek in the Cave the other night and it was fucking sweating, like, dripping into my eyes on stage.

    11. AL

      And it's hard. I've said this before. When you're on stage and you start to sweat, that's a symptom of bombing and it's hard to ... My body goes into, like, save yourself mode when I start sweating and it's like-

    12. JR

      Well, you're not comfortable.

    13. AL

      Yeah, and I'm like-

    14. JR

      You have to be comfortable on stage.

    15. AL

      You're pull ... Like, my ... I can't see.

    16. JR

      Well, with you, too, you got eye makeup, so it's like that shit's gonna get in your eyes. I remember one time-

    17. AL

      I'm actually don't wear makeup. This is what I wake up as.

    18. JR

      Crazy.

    19. AL

      I'm so pretty.

    20. JR

      You are so pretty for, like-

    21. AL

      I just wake up like this.

    22. JR

      ... natural. I remember one time I came straight from Fear Factor and I had sunscreen on-

    23. AL

      Oh.

    24. JR

      ... and I didn't realize I had sunscreen on.

    25. AL

      Mm-hmm.

    26. JR

      And I'm on stage, and I sweat, and the sweat got in my eye, and then I was in pain. So, I was g- I was trying to do my act, like-

    27. AL

      Yeah.

    28. JR

      ... while my eyes were tearing up.

    29. AL

      ... that's terrible. I also f- that's why I can't surf.

    30. JR

      Oh, saltwater.

  7. 12:4415:28

    Waco, cult history, and the surreal wave pool surf park

    1. JR

      Well, you know, in Texas, there's a place down in Waco where it's, uh, an indoor surf place.

    2. AL

      I know about Waco.

    3. JR

      Uh, yeah, that's a different thing that that's...

    4. AL

      (laughs)

    5. JR

      They, they don't like to talk about that anymore.

    6. AL

      (laughs) It's very gross.

    7. JR

      Now it's like a home im- a home improvement spot.

    8. AL

      (laughs)

    9. JR

      Do you know that? Like, there's a family that-

    10. AL

      They're really good at punch, putting up holes?

    11. JR

      No, there's like a famous family that, like, settled in Waco. They're on, like, one of them fix 'em up TV shows.

    12. AL

      Oh, the couple...

    13. JR

      Yeah.

    14. AL

      Yeah. The Fixer Upper couple.

    15. JR

      Yeah.

    16. AL

      Yeah.

    17. JR

      Well, um, that's, that's Waco now.

    18. AL

      That's the new, that's new Waco. Okay.

    19. JR

      That's like everybody's in that... But in Waco there's a, um, a, uh-

    20. AL

      Waco's not very woke-o if they're pretending that thing didn't happen.

    21. JR

      Oh, I don't think-

    22. AL

      You know you're gonna have more of these jokes. (laughs)

    23. NA

      (laughs)

    24. JR

      I don't think it's that they're pretending it didn't happen, I just think they don't talk about it that much.

    25. AL

      I guess you don't need to.

    26. JR

      Well, I mean, uh, everybody knows-

    27. AL

      (laughs)

    28. JR

      ... you know, the FBI lit those fucking people on fire or whatever, whatever.

    29. AL

      I know, it's like their home improvement.

    30. JR

      Yeah.

  8. 15:2827:44

    Jiu-jitsu after COVID: hygiene reality, training intensity, and mindset improvements

    1. AL

      I have not done jujits-

    2. JR

      This is like you have training.

    3. AL

      I have not done jujitsu since before the pandemic. I am now so grossed out. I was thinking about all the ball sweat, I was thinking about the smell of the-

    4. JR

      Ball sweat?

    5. AL

      Yes, the smell of...

    6. JR

      Men?

    7. AL

      And listen, I'm no, I'm not Mr. Clean over here, I got my own smells going on.

    8. JR

      (laughs) You smell great.

    9. AL

      In fact, when I would go to-

    10. JR

      When I hugged you, I was impressed.

    11. AL

      (laughs)

    12. JR

      (laughs)

    13. AL

      When I would go into class, when I would go into 10th plane, I would go to whoever my partner was, I go, "I did yoga before this, so I'm sorry or thank you, whichever," or, "I'm sorry or welcome, whichever you're into, I'm not sure what you like." But-

    14. JR

      Now, you would go yoga and then straight into jujitsu?

    15. AL

      Well, I would try to wash off a little bit.

    16. JR

      But that's crazy.

    17. AL

      Yeah.

    18. JR

      That's a lot of exercise.

    19. AL

      Oh, I was ripped. Before I was doing-

    20. JR

      Bro. Bro.

    21. AL

      ... I was not like... Well, I wasn't ripped, but I was-

    22. JR

      You're shredded.

    23. AL

      I was pretty good before the pandemic and then-

    24. JR

      That's a lot of exercise in one day though-

    25. AL

      Yeah.

    26. JR

      ... is what I'm saying.

    27. AL

      Yeah, I would do that, and then I had a meditation class I would go to.

    28. JR

      Damn, look at you. Centered.

    29. AL

      And I was still fucking psycho, dude. I was way more psycho then than I am now.

    30. JR

      Really?

  9. 27:4443:36

    Lockdowns, small businesses, and the corporate advantage debate (then: Adderall talk)

    1. JR

      I was watching this thing today, I was reading this thing today. 37% of all small businesses in America are gone for good. That's fucking crazy.

    2. AL

      Yeah.

    3. JR

      And it's like the, how the fuck do they ever come back? If they do. Imagine if you worked for 30 years of your life for something and you built it up and, you know, you're getting by and you're doing well and, you know-

    4. AL

      Yeah.

    5. JR

      ... you're making a good living and then all of a sudden (snaps fingers) it's gone.

    6. AL

      Yeah. But you know what? Life is unpredictable and we gotta just take it-

    7. JR

      Yeah. But this is-

    8. AL

      ... figure it out.

    9. JR

      ... because of regulations. This isn't really unpredictable. This is-

    10. AL

      Yeah, but-

    11. JR

      This is just foolishness-

    12. AL

      Yeah.

    13. JR

      ... because Walgreens was open.

    14. AL

      Yeah.

    15. JR

      You know, Target was open.

    16. AL

      I know Target was open.

    17. JR

      All these different places were open and they told small businesses-

    18. AL

      It is really weird, yeah.

    19. JR

      ... they couldn't be open. It's not really weird. It's idiotic.

    20. AL

      Yeah.

    21. JR

      And there's a lot of people that think that... I don't wanna get into it.

    22. AL

      (laughs)

    23. JR

      It's, it's, it's people that think that it's like a, an effort-

    24. AL

      Yeah.

    25. JR

      ... that, that it was on purpose and that like they recognize that this is an opportunity to get rid of these small businesses and build up-

    26. AL

      Oh, really?

    27. JR

      ... these bigger businesses. Yeah.

    28. AL

      Oh.

    29. JR

      That's what the, the most cynical and conspiracy minded amongst us think. They think that they recognize this as an attack on small businesses-

    30. AL

      Oh.

  10. 43:3644:32

    Back on the road: green-room boundaries, touring strategy, and early career milestones

    1. JR

      So, you're back in, in doing shows?

    2. AL

      I'm doing shows. I'm having the most fun-

    3. JR

      You're on the road.

    4. AL

      ... on the road.

    5. JR

      Yeah.

    6. AL

      I'm on the road. You can check out my tour dates. I'm gonna-

    7. JR

      Do you bring anybody with you, or do you go?

    8. AL

      I'm trying to find the right person to bring with me.

    9. JR

      Yeah.

    10. AL

      'Cause it's such a vibe, right? Like, it's ... You need someone that's-

    11. JR

      Right.

    12. AL

      ... like cool to hang out with that knows boundaries, like if I don't wanna hang out too much or-

    13. JR

      Right.

    14. AL

      'Cause I found like the couple of gigs that I've done, even though my openers are really nice, I'm, there's a ... I, I can't handle that, the questions, the energy. It's like something I'm not interested in doing.

    15. JR

      Sometimes it's rough when you're trying to get ready for a show-

    16. AL

      Mm-hmm.

    17. JR

      ... and they wanna talk to you about stuff-

    18. AL

      Yeah.

    19. JR

      ... and they ask questions and you're writing notes. And you're like, "Hey, man."

    20. AL

      Yeah. I don't wanna be rude but ... And it's like, I'm, I don't wanna be one of those people that's like, "No one's allowed in the green room," but it's like no one's allowed in the green room. I can't ... Unless, you know, I find the right person.

    21. JR

      Well, the worst is when they bring friends.

    22. AL

      Mm-hmm.

    23. JR

      Like, you have an opening act and they bring three friends-

    24. AL

      Mm-hmm.

    25. JR

      ... in the green room, and you're like ... And they start taking pictures. And you're like, "Hey, hey, hey."

    26. AL

      Yeah.

    27. JR

      "What are we doing here? This is work."

    28. AL

      I know. And it's always of my feet. I'm like, "Those can't get out." Um-

    29. JR

      Oh. Don't you pixelate them all?

    30. AL

      I do. I've been pixelating.

  11. 44:3248:58

    Big gigs and full-circle moments: headlining Carolines and comedy in an NFL stadium

    1. AL

      (laughs) So, I, um, I'm doing two, like really incredible shows that I'm really excited about. I'm doing ... My main tour is gonna start in the fall, but I'm doing like ... I have a bunch of shows. I'm going all over the place.

    2. JR

      You're doing-

    3. AL

      So, go to my website.

    4. JR

      L- are you trying to do like small places? You're trying to do like-

    5. AL

      I'm doing clubs and then I'm doing like Carolines, which was where I first started.

    6. JR

      Oh.

    7. AL

      Where I-

    8. JR

      Those were your first?

    9. AL

      It wasn't my first spot, but it was my first weekend. I worked with Jim Norton, was my first, um, weekend working.

    10. JR

      Oh, that's nice.

    11. AL

      It was so fun. And I did their March Madness Contest, where I like waited in line like it was Last Comic Standing, you know.

    12. JR

      Oh.

    13. AL

      And I did one minute in front of Louis and I got passed on to the next round, and I got really far. And that was like very early in my career. And then they kept my, my stuff, and then Norton wanted to ... Likes to have a female opener so it like balances-

    14. JR

      Mm-hmm.

    15. AL

      ... his act. And so he picked me, and I, I opened for him, and then I would ... Went on the road with him for about a year or two.

    16. JR

      That's awesome.

    17. AL

      And learned so much. But I'm finally ... I'm going back to headline for the first time-

    18. JR

      Ooh.

    19. AL

      ... in August. I'm so excited.

    20. JR

      That's your first time ever headlining Carolines?

    21. AL

      Carolines, yeah.

    22. JR

      Wow.

    23. AL

      So, it's like this weird full circle. I'm just having this-

    24. JR

      That's nice.

    25. AL

      ... such a good time coming back. I'm going to all these different places. My, my thing will be coming out. I'm also doing a show for The Eagles. Not the band.

    26. JR

      The Eagles the band?

    27. AL

      No, not the band.

    28. JR

      No. Philadelphia?

    29. AL

      Where I'm from. So, I'm going back to Philadelphia at the Lincoln Financial Field. I'm doing the stadium-

    30. JR

      What?

  12. 48:5858:11

    Self-love, accountability, and subconscious reprogramming (coaching, visualization, ‘pronoia’)

    1. AL

      If I work on like loving myself, and guys, get ready. Can you do like a fake tear?

    2. JR

      Do you love yourself?

    3. AL

      I very much do, and I did not before.

    4. JR

      Oh.

    5. AL

      I didn't realize that-

    6. JR

      When did it start?

    7. AL

      You know ...... over this, this pandemic, I really-

    8. JR

      You didn't love yourself before the pandemic?

    9. AL

      I mean, I liked myself, but I was, I was really mad at myself. I was, like, being hard on myself.

    10. JR

      For real?

    11. AL

      Yeah.

    12. JR

      In what way?

    13. AL

      I just-

    14. JR

      Like, what, what was bothering you?

    15. AL

      I think that I just had this subconscious belief that I was just bad. It was just from childhood, it just, like, this message that I got as a kid that I-

    16. JR

      Mm-hmm.

    17. AL

      ... how I perceived-

    18. JR

      Yeah.

    19. AL

      ... how I was treated or something.

    20. JR

      Yeah.

    21. AL

      And I just clung to that. And I look at everything, like the way I wasn't making money, the way I was like, I felt so like I needed things, you know? And it, it was because it was low self-esteem.

    22. JR

      Well, here's what's important. That's most of us.

    23. AL

      Yeah.

    24. JR

      That's most of us. Even me.

    25. AL

      Yeah.

    26. JR

      Yeah, that was me for a long time.

    27. AL

      Yeah.

    28. JR

      Most of us feel in- inadequate, and then when you become successful, um, we... A lot of us have imposter syndrome.

    29. AL

      Yeah.

    30. JR

      You know, when things start doing well, and even though you know you've worked hard-

  13. 58:1159:22

    Family joy: surprising her nieces—accidentally as a ‘tiger’—and feeling genuinely good

    1. AL

      But I feel really... Yeah, I just feel really good. I had a really-

    2. JR

      Awesome.

    3. AL

      ... amazing time with my family this weekend. I posted a video of... I always surprise my nieces. I don't know if you've seen it on my Instagram.

    4. JR

      No.

    5. AL

      I'm always, like, popping out of boxes or something.

    6. JR

      (laughs)

    7. AL

      But I hadn't seen them in a year and a half.

    8. JR

      Aw.

    9. AL

      So my brother and I made this video. Do you want... Would you play it, Jamie? It's on my Instagram. You're gonna die 'cause you're gonna laugh. There's some things I wanna talk to you about what I did not think through. So when we did this, I was like, um... They hadn't seen me in so long. I was like, "I'll wear my leopard print jacket to help them, like, so they know it's me ahead of time 'cause they know me by it."

    10. JR

      Oh, right.

    11. AL

      But look what happened instead.

    12. JV

      Move it back to, like, where it goes. (screaming)

    13. AL

      (laughs) She thought I was a fucking tiger.

    14. JR

      Oh, no.

    15. AL

      Look at her stance.

    16. JR

      Oh, no.

    17. AL

      Look how she's squared up.

    18. JV

      (screaming)

    19. JR

      But they're excited to see you once they realize-

    20. AL

      Yeah, they're so excited. You don't have to-

    21. JR

      Oh, that's so cute.

    22. AL

      They, they then go inside and see my family and stuff, but-

    23. JR

      That's so cute.

    24. AL

      ... it's just so funny because they go, "We thought you were a tiger." And I didn't even-

    25. JR

      Oh, that's hilarious 'cause your jacket-

    26. AL

      ... think about that. They were at soccer practice, and then they were in the fucking Jungle Book, like-

  14. 59:221:06:31

    Texas wildlife chaos: mystery black panther sighting and how exotic animals end up nearby

    1. JR

      Oh, dude, last night, okay?

    2. AL

      Mm-hmm.

    3. JR

      Last night on my security camera, there was a big black cat, like a 60, 70-pound fucking something or another.

    4. AL

      Oh, my God.

    5. JR

      Well, I don't know what it... See, the thing about Texas is, this is a real issue, there's more tigers in captivity in Texas than all of the wild of the world.

    6. AL

      Really? Because of, like, rich people wanting-

    7. JR

      Yes, 'cause assholes.

    8. AL

      Yeah.

    9. JR

      'Cause people just have a fucking fence, "I want a tiger," and you could just have a tiger here-

    10. AL

      Yeah.

    11. JR

      ... 'cause, 'cause of freedom. Freedom, America.

    12. AL

      Yeah, I get it.

    13. JR

      Like zebras. Like, my wife saw a zebra once. She was driving down the road, she saw a zebra. I was like, "A fucking zebra?"

    14. AL

      (laughs)

    15. JR

      Zebras just get out, right? Like, people have zebras, and they just get out sometimes. Well-

    16. AL

      (laughs)

    17. JR

      ... whatever this thing was, it's like a black panther-

    18. AL

      Can you ride a zebra?

    19. JR

      No, you cannot.

    20. AL

      Are they short?

    21. JR

      No, they're horse-sized. They're f- It's a fucking horse, a wild horse that cannot be tamed. No one has ever been able to tame a zebra. It's like trying to ride a wolf. Like, get the fuck out of here.

    22. AL

      I relate. Maybe my spirit animal is a zebra.

    23. JR

      Anyway, I'm in the middle of this.

    24. AL

      Sorry.

    25. JR

      Outside of my fucking house-

    26. AL

      (laughs)

    27. JR

      ... there is a, a b- a big black cat-

    28. AL

      Yeah.

    29. JR

      ... like a black panther.

    30. AL

      Wow.

Episode duration: 3:01:15

Install uListen for AI-powered chat & search across the full episode — Get Full Transcript

Transcript of episode zrGqWefphHw

Get more out of YouTube videos.

High quality summaries for YouTube videos. Accurate transcripts to search & find moments. Powered by ChatGPT & Claude AI.