Joe Rogan Experience #1672 - Iliza

1. 0:00 – 15:00

   (drum roll) Joe Rogan podcast,…

   1. NANarrator0:00

      (drum roll) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out. The Joe Rogan Experience.

   2. JRJoe Rogan0:06

      Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. (energetic music) Hello, Iliza.

   3. ISIliza Shlesinger0:15

      Hi, Joe Rogan.

   4. JRJoe Rogan0:16

      Good to see you, as always.

   5. ISIliza Shlesinger0:17

      Thanks so much for having me.

   6. JRJoe Rogan0:18

      I hear you're a big movie star now.

   7. ISIliza Shlesinger0:20

      I, (laughs) who told you that?

   8. JRJoe Rogan0:21

      Uh, Vanity Fair or someone.

   9. ISIliza Shlesinger0:24

      (laughs) They misspelled my name in the article?

   10. JRJoe Rogan0:26

       No.

   11. ISIliza Shlesinger0:26

       It c-

   12. JRJoe Rogan0:26

       How'd they fuck up Iliza? Did they-

   13. ISIliza Shlesinger0:28

       No, no.

   14. JRJoe Rogan0:28

       ... fuck up the last name?

   15. ISIliza Shlesinger0:29

       It's the last name.

   16. JRJoe Rogan0:30

       Yeah. Well, th- that's why you went with just Iliza too, right? You're in that rare group of humans that could go with one name.

   17. ISIliza Shlesinger0:35

       People are like, "Who do you think you are?" I'm like, "Someone with a complex German phonetic (laughs) last name."

   18. JRJoe Rogan0:40

       Yeah.

   19. ISIliza Shlesinger0:40

       That's all.

   20. JRJoe Rogan0:40

       Schlesinger. That's, it's a rough one.

   21. ISIliza Shlesinger0:42

       Schlesinger, yeah. It's rough.

   22. JRJoe Rogan0:43

       It's hard.

   23. ISIliza Shlesinger0:44

       It's hard-

   24. JRJoe Rogan0:45

       See, I fucked it up, and I've known you forever.

   25. ISIliza Shlesinger0:46

       I'm so used to it though. And what's weird is-

   26. JRJoe Rogan0:50

       Hm.

   27. ISIliza Shlesinger0:50

       ... people always say it wrong, and then when they spell it, yes, there should be a C in it, but there isn't. But they'll go to spell it, and they always add a C. I'm like, "Weird that, like, you don't understand anything else, but you have a firm grasp on German phonetics." Like, everybody knows there should be a C.

   28. JRJoe Rogan1:04

       Hm.

   29. ISIliza Shlesinger1:04

       No matter how smart or stupid they are.

   30. JRJoe Rogan1:05

       Really?
2. 15:00 – 30:00

   It's like Chris Rock's…

   1. JRJoe Rogan15:00

      guess what? The whole reason this exists was because of the, the ability to say crazy shit."

   2. ISIliza Shlesinger15:05

      It's like Chris Rock's joke, like, "The tiger didn't go crazy. The tiger went tiger."

   3. JRJoe Rogan15:09

      (laughs) Yeah. Exactly.

   4. ISIliza Shlesinger15:09

      Like, you brought in a comic.

   5. JRJoe Rogan15:11

      Yeah.

   6. ISIliza Shlesinger15:11

      You're lucky that I'm sober. Like-

   7. JRJoe Rogan15:13

      Yeah.

   8. ISIliza Shlesinger15:13

      ... it's so little is expected of us.

   9. JRJoe Rogan15:15

      Right.

   10. ISIliza Shlesinger15:15

       People are like, "Wow, she came. She knew her lines." I'm like, "Yeah." Like, you're lucky, like when you hire a comic, you don't know if we're gonna bite you.

   11. JRJoe Rogan15:22

       Right. Well, what we're used to doing, the open-endedness of clubs.

   12. ISIliza Shlesinger15:26

       Yeah.

   13. JRJoe Rogan15:26

       You know, you're showing up, "Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Iliza." And you get on stage and there's not a fucking... There's no direction.

   14. ISIliza Shlesinger15:34

       Nothing.

   15. JRJoe Rogan15:34

       There's n- There's just you and an audience-

   16. ISIliza Shlesinger15:37

       Yeah.

   17. JRJoe Rogan15:37

       ... and you got a mic and you're talking shit, and you're just saying crazy stuff, and y- y- it's all you're producing it, you're directing it, you're writing it.

   18. ISIliza Shlesinger15:45

       It's like Thunderdome.

   19. JRJoe Rogan15:46

       Yeah.

   20. ISIliza Shlesinger15:46

       Like, there's no... You build this career off of saying the things that you say and people agreeing. And then, of course, if you're too loud, people are like, "You're just a comic. You can't have an opinion." I'm like, "What the fuck do you think this is?"

   21. JRJoe Rogan15:58

       Yeah.

   22. ISIliza Shlesinger15:58

       My act is all my opinions that you were fine with until you disagreed. Intelligent people can separate the difference of opinion from... I get a lot of people that are like, "I don't agree with you, but you're funny." And I'm like-

   23. JRJoe Rogan16:08

       Yeah.

   24. ISIliza Shlesinger16:08

       ... "That's an evolved human."

   25. JRJoe Rogan16:10

       Yeah. There's people that are healthy. They're-

   26. ISIliza Shlesinger16:11

       There's a couple.

   27. JRJoe Rogan16:12

       They can take it. They can take it.

   28. ISIliza Shlesinger16:13

       But comedy clubs are like... And like when you start out in those, like safety is not a concern. People forget how to act. I mean, I've dumped drinks on people. I have dumped bowls of popcorn on people.

   29. JRJoe Rogan16:26

       Why?

   30. ISIliza Shlesinger16:27

       For being disrespectful.
3. 30:00 – 45:00

   Mm-hmm. …

   1. ISIliza Shlesinger30:00

      So you can get to a place where you go, but for, there's a medium, like there's a group that's, like, still in that fight and haven't gotten to that next level. And then there's the people below that, that are like, "You weren't having much success, so you decided to leave." And all these decisions are okay. But I, I can think of a comic off the top of my head who was like, "I'm gonna leave LA. I'll come back whenever, but I'm gonna do my podcast from, like, a remote location." And you lose the connection to Hollywood.

   2. JRJoe Rogan30:24

      Mm-hmm.

   3. ISIliza Shlesinger30:24

      You cannot have both-

   4. JRJoe Rogan30:25

      No.

   5. ISIliza Shlesinger30:26

      ... 'cause that's not how it's designed. But-

   6. JRJoe Rogan30:28

      If, if you wanna do that, if you wanna act and you wanna do that, tho- though, especially acting-

   7. ISIliza Shlesinger30:33

      Yeah.

   8. JRJoe Rogan30:33

      ... that's the spot to be, for sure.

   9. ISIliza Shlesinger30:34

      If t- if, only just to be in it, not to get complacent, you know. Yes, you could, if you're someone like a Tom Segura or Sebastian, I guess I could do it too. You could live somewhere else-

   10. JRJoe Rogan30:44

       Yeah.

   11. ISIliza Shlesinger30:44

       ... 'cause you're touring so much, right?

   12. JRJoe Rogan30:46

       Right.

   13. ISIliza Shlesinger30:46

       But if you're not at this level where you are, you know, you're playing these theaters and you're making all this money-... you wanna be somewhere where you have access to as many opinions as possible and you're performing. Like, the Comedy Store is great 'cause you have a different audience every night from all over.

   14. JRJoe Rogan31:00

       Mm-hmm.

   15. ISIliza Shlesinger31:01

       And so, I think people don't wanna admit that and they want this easy life of, "Oh, I've moved to Austin," which is fantastic, but it's not the same grind. And these cities, New York and LA, produce entertainment because of that hustle. And it doesn't mean you can't hustle elsewhere, but you have to be very clear about what it is you wanna get out of this career.

   16. JRJoe Rogan31:19

       Yeah. If you're trying to do acting, there's really one place to live. I mean, maybe you can kinda live in New York.

   17. ISIliza Shlesinger31:24

       I mean, you could do Austin and Nashville and you could get bit parts, but-

   18. JRJoe Rogan31:27

       Hmm.

   19. ISIliza Shlesinger31:27

       ... there's something to be said for p- like, hand-to-hand combat (laughs) of like-

   20. JRJoe Rogan31:31

       Yeah.

   21. ISIliza Shlesinger31:31

       ... meeting a director, meeting other actors, and being in the thick of it.

   22. JRJoe Rogan31:34

       Yeah.

   23. ISIliza Shlesinger31:34

       And you sacrifice having your kids grow up around normal people (laughs) and not-

   24. JRJoe Rogan31:38

       Mm-hmm.

   25. ISIliza Shlesinger31:38

       ... having a headache all the time by living in LA.

   26. JRJoe Rogan31:41

       The thing about this place as opposed to LA, though, for standup, if someone wants to be a, a real standup comic, you could do it here and you could do it here, I think, in a better way 'cause you're not connected to the system. The problem with being connected to the system is there's a lotta actors that are also doing standup, or standup who are also acting, and they kind of morph their personality to, to fit woke Hollywood. You know? And there's, there's a concern with saying certain things on stage. There's a concern with your ability to express yourself freely.

   27. ISIliza Shlesinger32:13

       I ... There's always gonna be actors who dabble.

   28. JRJoe Rogan32:17

       Yeah.

   29. ISIliza Shlesinger32:17

       And there's always gonna be people who decide to do standup later or take it as, like, a third career.

   30. JRJoe Rogan32:22

       Mm-hmm.
4. 45:00 – 1:00:00

   Right. …

   1. ISIliza Shlesinger45:00

      I mean, who checks that? Would a person who works at a hedge fund know the difference between a club headliner and a theater headliner? Like there's lev-

   2. JRJoe Rogan45:09

      Right.

   3. ISIliza Shlesinger45:09

      Like why w- ... Okay, that sounds really boring, and whatever. I get that that's with numbers and- and money.

   4. JRJoe Rogan45:16

      But he went to a college.

   5. ISIliza Shlesinger45:18

      He went to a college, just not that one.

   6. JRJoe Rogan45:20

      He just lied about Yale.

   7. ISIliza Shlesinger45:22

      Right.

   8. JRJoe Rogan45:22

      Yeah. But he did-

   9. ISIliza Shlesinger45:22

      That's what I found out way later.

   10. JRJoe Rogan45:24

       ... work at a hedge fund.

   11. ISIliza Shlesinger45:25

       Yeah, but I think it was like super low level. Like he made it like, "Oh, I'm starting my own business." And-

   12. JRJoe Rogan45:29

       Mm-hmm.

   13. ISIliza Shlesinger45:30

       You know, you're 29 years old. You're sitting in a first-class seat and you're dressed like a dork. And you're talking ab- ... Like why wouldn't I believe you? I have-

   14. JRJoe Rogan45:37

       Right.

   15. ISIliza Shlesinger45:37

       ... plenty of friends who are successful at things-

   16. JRJoe Rogan45:39

       Yeah.

   17. ISIliza Shlesinger45:40

       ... other than stand-up and most ... you know, so ...

   18. JRJoe Rogan45:42

       But my- my point was that if he just was himself-

   19. ISIliza Shlesinger45:45

       Yes.

   20. JRJoe Rogan45:46

       And he just said, "I'm working at a hedge fund," and was the same guy, just as funny-

   21. ISIliza Shlesinger45:50

       Thousand percent working.

   22. JRJoe Rogan45:50

       ... you'd probably like him.

   23. ISIliza Shlesinger45:51

       That is the ... it ... You completely keyed in on it. The whole takeaway from the movie is all the things that he didn't lie about were the things that I actually valued the most.

   24. JRJoe Rogan46:02

       Hmm.

   25. ISIliza Shlesinger46:02

       He was ... You cannot fake intelligence. You cannot fake sense of humor.

   26. JRJoe Rogan46:06

       Right.

   27. ISIliza Shlesinger46:06

       You cannot fake wit.

   28. JRJoe Rogan46:07

       Right. And he had those.

   29. ISIliza Shlesinger46:09

       He had those things. He was unattractive, (laughs) which is probably a big source of his insecurity and whatever else society put on him. But that was the sad part, was I wasn't that impressed by going to a good school and having a job I've never heard of.

   30. JRJoe Rogan46:23

       Right.
5. 1:00:00 – 1:04:13

   But she had the…

   1. ISIliza Shlesinger1:00:00

      wasn't. I thought she was-

   2. JRJoe Rogan1:00:01

      But she had the thing around her nose.

   3. ISIliza Shlesinger1:00:02

      She was just found in a bush. Somebody, just to be cruel, tied a wire around her mouth and threw her in a bush.

   4. JRJoe Rogan1:00:07

      Oh, God.

   5. ISIliza Shlesinger1:00:07

      And she was, like, starving. So, look, the dog is not smart.

   6. JRJoe Rogan1:00:11

      Really?

   7. ISIliza Shlesinger1:00:11

      I just let her have whatever she wants. Yeah.

   8. JRJoe Rogan1:00:12

      Oh, she's a sweetie.

   9. ISIliza Shlesinger1:00:13

      She's a sweet baby. Um, I buy... I spend money on quality things. I don't like a ton of material things. I don't collect things. I don't... You spend it on airline travel, you spend it on hotels.

   10. JRJoe Rogan1:00:25

       I get it.

   11. ISIliza Shlesinger1:00:26

       You spend it on the people in your life. And, like, nice jeans.

   12. JRJoe Rogan1:00:31

       Nice jeans?

   13. ISIliza Shlesinger1:00:32

       I'm, I'm... I wear, like, two things.

   14. JRJoe Rogan1:00:34

       I get it.

   15. ISIliza Shlesinger1:00:34

       So...

   16. JRJoe Rogan1:00:35

       Listen, that's you.

   17. ISIliza Shlesinger1:00:36

       That's me, baby.

   18. JRJoe Rogan1:00:36

       I'm not trying to change you.

   19. ISIliza Shlesinger1:00:37

       No.

   20. JRJoe Rogan1:00:38

       I just think that car is a piece of shit, and you should probably get rid of it (laughs) .

   21. ISIliza Shlesinger1:00:40

       Do you really think that or are you just thinking it's an old car?

   22. JRJoe Rogan1:00:42

       (laughs)

   23. ISIliza Shlesinger1:00:43

       Honda makes a great car.

   24. JRJoe Rogan1:00:44

       I don't care. They're, they're awesome. Listen, one of my favorite cars I've ever had was a Honda.

   25. ISIliza Shlesinger1:00:48

       So-

   26. JRJoe Rogan1:00:49

       Had a Honda NSX.

   27. ISIliza Shlesinger1:00:50

       Can I... Can I-

   28. JRJoe Rogan1:00:50

       I had two of them, in fact.

   29. ISIliza Shlesinger1:00:51

       I don't even know what that is.

   30. JRJoe Rogan1:00:53

       It's a diff-

Episode duration: 2:49:13