Joe Rogan Experience #1715 - Jessica Kirson

1. 0:00 – 15:00

   (drumbeats) Joe Rogan podcast,…

   1. JRJoe Rogan0:00

      (drumbeats) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.

   2. JKJessica Kirson0:04

      The Joe Rogan Experience. (rock music plays)

   3. JRJoe Rogan0:06

      Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. Why the fuck would anybody interrupt your show to do that?

   4. JKJessica Kirson0:15

      Because they're crazy.

   5. JRJoe Rogan0:17

      That is such a dumb thing to do-

   6. JKJessica Kirson0:19

      I know.

   7. JRJoe Rogan0:19

      ... interrupt a performance-

   8. JKJessica Kirson0:21

      Yeah.

   9. JRJoe Rogan0:21

      ... to move a bottle off a stool.

   10. JKJessica Kirson0:23

       Yeah.

   11. JRJoe Rogan0:23

       Like, as if someone's at home going, "Well, I was enjoying a performance. She was very funny."

   12. JKJessica Kirson0:27

       Yeah.

   13. JRJoe Rogan0:27

       "But that bottle-

   14. JKJessica Kirson0:29

       Right, I mean, I- there would ha- there would-

   15. JRJoe Rogan0:30

       ... that bottle on the stool."

   16. JKJessica Kirson0:30

       ... have been millions of people who would've been upset about the bottle, so it makes sense.

   17. JRJoe Rogan0:34

       Well, was it a product placement thing? Was there a label on the bottle that was a problem?

   18. JKJessica Kirson0:37

       No, it just was bothering someone that there was a bottle in the way.

   19. JRJoe Rogan0:40

       Oh, my God. This is why it's a problem when you have executives and too many cooks in the kitchen.

   20. JKJessica Kirson0:46

       I agree completely.

   21. JRJoe Rogan0:49

       What a fucking nightmare.

   22. JKJessica Kirson0:50

       I was so pissed. I literally went to the microphone and said, "I'm gonna fucking kill myself."

   23. JRJoe Rogan0:56

       (laughs)

   24. JKJessica Kirson0:56

       That was what I said.

   25. JRJoe Rogan0:57

       They should've left that whole thing in.

   26. JKJessica Kirson0:59

       I know. (laughs)

   27. JRJoe Rogan0:59

       Like the person coming on the stage, taking off the bottle, and showing like what other art form would be disrespected like that?

   28. JKJessica Kirson1:06

       Yeah.

   29. JRJoe Rogan1:07

       Could you imagine Eric Clapton in the middle-

   30. JKJessica Kirson1:08

       (laughs)
2. 15:00 – 30:00

   Yeah, I don't get…

   1. JRJoe Rogan15:00

      people that are getting out of this slump and moving on with their lives.

   2. JKJessica Kirson15:04

      Yeah, I don't get it. It's like, it's okay for you and you can choose whatever you want. And if you wanna stay home, I totally respect that. But what does that have to do with me and my life?

   3. JRJoe Rogan15:13

      Well, now you're talking like a rational person.

   4. JKJessica Kirson15:15

      Right. Why is someone judging me for my choices? I don't judge anyone for their choices. I don't get it.

   5. JRJoe Rogan15:22

      I'm a big fan of judging people for their choices. It's fun.

   6. JKJessica Kirson15:24

      (laughs) No, I'm serious.

   7. JRJoe Rogan15:27

      (laughs) I am, too. I judge 'em. I just d- I won't attack 'em publicly.

   8. JKJessica Kirson15:30

      No, I'm saying that, that, but, w- I think that's what I'm saying.

   9. JRJoe Rogan15:33

      Yeah.

   10. JKJessica Kirson15:33

       Of course, I judge people. (laughs) But like-

   11. JRJoe Rogan15:35

       (laughs)

   12. JKJessica Kirson15:35

       ... I would never publicly say-

   13. JRJoe Rogan15:38

       Yeah.

   14. JKJessica Kirson15:38

       ... about another comic, like, it's like, you know, if someone decides to stay home, great. If they decide to go out, gr- Like, I just, it's not, it's not... I just didn't think it was appropriate to go and be like, "How dare you go out and start working?"

   15. JRJoe Rogan15:52

       Yeah.

   16. JKJessica Kirson15:52

       You know, I, I got a- a- also I got extra defensive about it because I not only support four kids, but I have a child with a, a heart disease. I don't even know if you know that.

   17. JRJoe Rogan16:03

       I know, I didn't know that.

   18. JKJessica Kirson16:03

       My five and a half year old has severe heart disease. And, you know, we have medical bills. I deal with a lot of stuff. And I ha- I had to get out and work. Like, these people don't h- People have their own experiences.

   19. JRJoe Rogan16:16

       Yeah.

   20. JKJessica Kirson16:16

       You know? You don't know other people's stories. And I had people say shit to me, like in New York when I saw them eventually. Like, "I can't believe you went out and worked. I can't believe you got on planes." What the fuck are you talking about?

   21. JRJoe Rogan16:28

       (laughs)

   22. JKJessica Kirson16:28

       You don't know my story. You don't know the bills I have or what I need to do. You d-

   23. JRJoe Rogan16:31

       It's so convenient when someone's single and they don't have any real obligation to anybody other than themselves.

   24. JKJessica Kirson16:34

       Exactly. That's what I'm trying to say.

   25. JRJoe Rogan16:37

       Yeah. Yeah, and after a while, it's like, you know, we gotta move on, kids. We gotta move on.

   26. JKJessica Kirson16:43

       Mm-hmm.

   27. JRJoe Rogan16:43

       We gotta move on with life, like, w- w- you know? It's been almost two years. It's time to keep rolling.

   28. JKJessica Kirson16:50

       Well, some of us have to move o- I mean...

   29. JRJoe Rogan16:52

       Yeah.

   30. JKJessica Kirson16:52

       You know. I mean, I'm, I'm incredibly, uh, careful myself. Um, but I, I had, I have to move on. (laughs) You know?
3. 30:00 – 45:00

   No. …

   1. JRJoe Rogan30:00

      meat and dairy-

   2. JKJessica Kirson30:00

      No.

   3. JRJoe Rogan30:00

      ... because Chinese cooking is virtually dairy-free.

   4. JKJessica Kirson30:03

      Mm-hmm.

   5. JRJoe Rogan30:03

      Interesting.

   6. JKJessica Kirson30:04

      That's so... That makes so much sense.

   7. JRJoe Rogan30:06

      Mm. If, if, uh, Chinese American cooking, if there's any pork, which is not a Kosher food, it's usually concealed inside of something, like a wonton. A lot of Jews back then, and even now, kept strict Kosher inside the home, but were more flexible with food they ate at restaurants. Um, see if you can find pictures of Chinese folks working on the railroads, 'cause it's, it's, it's one of the darker, more unsung chapters of American history. You know, people don't really talk about it that much, but I read a article many years ago about it. Look at this. Building the transcontinental railroad-

   8. JKJessica Kirson30:39

      Wow.

   9. JRJoe Rogan30:39

      ... how 20,000 Chinese immigrants made it happen. Yeah, it was... I don't know how or why... I don't remember how or why it was, uh, Chinese people, but there's some-... c- see if you can find some pictures, because there's some crazy pictures of these folks working there, and it just, like, you see the looks in their faces, and they're malnourished and-

   10. JKJessica Kirson31:04

       Oh.

   11. JRJoe Rogan31:04

       ... ha- hammering fucking spikes into the, the ground and putting railroad ties down, just all the way across America.

   12. JKJessica Kirson31:12

       God, it's so, uh...

   13. JRJoe Rogan31:15

       People are gross.

   14. JKJessica Kirson31:16

       People are horrific. (laughs)

   15. JRJoe Rogan31:19

       (laughs) Yeah, that's a good one. (coughs) Chinese railroad workers. It's hard to see.

   16. JKJessica Kirson31:24

       There's one.

   17. JRJoe Rogan31:25

       That's a good one too. That's a good one.

   18. JKJessica Kirson31:26

       Yeah, they look happy.

   19. JRJoe Rogan31:27

       That's good. Yeah, fucking so depressed.

   20. JKJessica Kirson31:29

       That looks like my audience last night.

   21. JRJoe Rogan31:30

       Ah, gah, gah, gah, gah, gah. Where were you?

   22. JKJessica Kirson31:32

       What? I- in my hotel room.

   23. JRJoe Rogan31:35

       (laughs) Did you do a Zoom show?

   24. JKJessica Kirson31:37

       In, in my mind. (laughs)

   25. JRJoe Rogan31:39

       My friend, John Heffron, did a Zoom show back in the day, like way back in the day. He was, like, one of the first guys to do them before there was ever even a pandemic.

   26. JKJessica Kirson31:46

       Oh, really?

   27. JRJoe Rogan31:47

       Yeah, he, uh, he would, uh, set up these corporate shows-

   28. JKJessica Kirson31:50

       Mm-hmm.

   29. JRJoe Rogan31:50

       ... and what he would do is he would st- he would be in front of, uh, a camera, and he had, like, a wall of screens. So everyone that was-

   30. JKJessica Kirson32:01

       Mm-hmm.
4. 45:00 – 1:00:00

   That probably helped. …

   1. JKJessica Kirson45:00

      all over him in his mouth and then he came and-

   2. JRJoe Rogan45:02

      That probably helped.

   3. JKJessica Kirson45:02

      No, it was un-

   4. JRJoe Rogan45:03

      He came in his mouth too?

   5. JKJessica Kirson45:03

      Yes. It was... Okay, Tom kept saying, "It's not over." I said, "What's next?"

   6. JRJoe Rogan45:08

      (laughs)

   7. JKJessica Kirson45:08

      "What's next?"

   8. JRJoe Rogan45:09

      Oh my God. Jesus Christ. There's people out there like that, but that's my point. It's like there's people that always want to take things to the next level, you know?

   9. JKJessica Kirson45:20

      I don't understand eating shit. Like, and I'm very open.

   10. JRJoe Rogan45:23

       (laughs)

   11. JKJessica Kirson45:24

       I mean, I am, I am really open.

   12. JRJoe Rogan45:28

       What a crazy statement.

   13. JKJessica Kirson45:29

       Like, I get a lot.

   14. JRJoe Rogan45:30

       Yeah.

   15. JKJessica Kirson45:30

       Yeah, I get a lot. But I don't get eating shit. Like, and, and keeping, and picking it up and then keep putting it in your mouth, and then keep eating more, eating more. Like, I don't understand how that's a turn on. Do you?

   16. JRJoe Rogan45:43

       At some point in time you should stop.

   17. JKJessica Kirson45:45

       (Laughs) Yeah, it was like-

   18. JRJoe Rogan45:46

       Yeah, he shouldn't eat shit all day.

   19. JKJessica Kirson45:47

       Right, it was like he kept, like w- wouldn't left, leave any on the plate. He kept eating more and more and more. What is that? Do you understand it in any way?

   20. JRJoe Rogan45:57

       Bad parenting.

   21. JKJessica Kirson45:58

       (laughs)

   22. JRJoe Rogan45:59

       For sure. I mean, let's start with that. Let's start with bad parenting.

   23. JKJessica Kirson46:02

       That's what I mean. They're damaged. There's something wrong.

   24. JRJoe Rogan46:05

       Well, there's something that they, they say happens to people when they get, uh, like scolded for shitting their pants when they're really young and like really punished and shamed. For some men in particular, and it seems to mostly be men, for some men that becomes a thing that gets somehow, uh, attached to sexuality.

   25. JKJessica Kirson46:24

       That makes sense.

   26. JRJoe Rogan46:26

       Yeah. Yeah, like naughtiness and you're a bad boy. And then, you know, and then you're shitting and then, you know, you're doing sh- things like that. Maybe you want to see someone shit or some like... Y- you remember there was a story about a certain actor. Uh, I don't know if it's true, but he would, uh, hire women to shit on a glass table and he would-

   27. JKJessica Kirson46:44

       I r- I remember that.

   28. JRJoe Rogan46:45

       Yeah. Hey, yo. That guy.

   29. JKJessica Kirson46:47

       (laughs)

   30. JRJoe Rogan46:47

       And so he would, uh, he... (laughs) I don't know if it's true. It's probably not true, but let's just pretend it is.
5. 1:00:00 – 1:09:26

   Well, we don't have…

   1. JKJessica Kirson1:00:00

   2. JRJoe Rogan1:00:00

      Well, we don't have to... Oh, looks good.

   3. JKJessica Kirson1:00:02

      Oh, look at that.

   4. JRJoe Rogan1:00:02

      Bagels. That looks legit.

   5. JKJessica Kirson1:00:04

      Oh, yeah.

   6. JRJoe Rogan1:00:04

      Oh, look at that pastrami. Ruben.

   7. JKJessica Kirson1:00:05

      Oh, no, that's a good one.

   8. JRJoe Rogan1:00:07

      That's in Austin?

   9. JKJessica Kirson1:00:07

      I'm telling you.

   10. JVJamie Vernon1:00:08

       Yeah, north side of town.

   11. JRJoe Rogan1:00:09

       That looks fucking good.

   12. JKJessica Kirson1:00:09

       Yes. Oh, that has capers on it. That, no, that's a good one.

   13. JRJoe Rogan1:00:12

       That looks good.

   14. JKJessica Kirson1:00:13

       I can tell.

   15. JRJoe Rogan1:00:14

       That looks legit. Listen to me. All the sudden I'm Jewish. That looks good.

   16. JVJamie Vernon1:00:18

       Hey.

   17. JKJessica Kirson1:00:18

       (laughs)

   18. JRJoe Rogan1:00:18

       That looks legit.

   19. JVJamie Vernon1:00:19

       It's from Cleveland Mustard.

   20. JKJessica Kirson1:00:19

       That looks wonderful. Ball Park Mustard? Yeah.

   21. JVJamie Vernon1:00:22

       It's from Cleveland, so it's probably good.

   22. JRJoe Rogan1:00:24

       Oh, yeah. There you go. So, uh, but what my point was that like over time, like people ju- like it doesn't mean anything anymore.

   23. JKJessica Kirson1:00:31

       Mm-hmm.

   24. JRJoe Rogan1:00:31

       Like people like let it go. Like whatever prejudice they had in the past, over generations, it be- it becomes like less prevalent.

   25. JKJessica Kirson1:00:38

       Mm-hmm.

   26. JRJoe Rogan1:00:39

       And it seems like there's never been a time ever in our culture where being gay is more accepted. This is the most... Right?

   27. JKJessica Kirson1:00:46

       Absolutely.

   28. JRJoe Rogan1:00:46

       Right now?

   29. JKJessica Kirson1:00:47

       I don't think most people care at all.

   30. JRJoe Rogan1:00:49

       At all.

Episode duration: 2:32:17