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Joe Rogan Experience #1813 - Tony Hinchcliffe

Tony Hinchcliffe is a stand-up comedian, writer, and actor. He's also the co-host, along with Brian Redban, of the podcast and live YouTube show "Kill Tony." http://www.tonyhinchcliffe.com/

Tony HinchcliffeguestJoe Roganhost
Jun 27, 20242h 42mWatch on YouTube ↗

EVERY SPOKEN WORD

  1. 0:00 – 2:30

    Post-Stanhope Hangover + Recapping the Vulcan Comedy Lineup (Roseanne Surprise Set)

    1. NA

      (drum roll) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.

    2. NA

      The Joe Rogan Experience.

    3. NA

      Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night. All day. (instrumental music plays)

    4. TH

      A- and we're up.

    5. JR

      Phew. All day I've been trying to recover from yesterday, drinking with Stanhope.

    6. TH

      Oh yeah, he's a fun one to hang out with, huh?

    7. JR

      (laughs) We did a podcast, like, right when he was coming out of the pandemic and I think I was probably sober or mostly sober during the podcast and it just didn't... it just felt off. It felt clunky and he felt like that too. So I'm like, this one, gonna make sure we do it right and I just got blasted with him. We just drank whiskey and got fucked up and talked for like... How long was it?

    8. NA

      Three and a half hours.

    9. JR

      Three and a half hours.

    10. TH

      Wow.

    11. JR

      And w- and couple of pee breaks and just obliterated. I don't remember half what we talked about.

    12. TH

      He's so fun.

    13. JR

      Yeah.

    14. TH

      Last night was incredible.

    15. JR

      Last night was insane.

    16. TH

      Yeah.

    17. JR

      Let's tell everybody... First of all, let's tell everybody, you're gonna be in Phoenix this weekend at Stand Up Live, um, which is an awesome club. Uh, and maybe I'll drop in on Friday 'cause I'm gonna be there for the UFC. Ooh.

    18. TH

      Beautiful. Let's have some fun.

    19. JR

      We'll have some fun. Uh, the great and powerful William Montgomery will be there as well. Uh, and then, uh, last night we do a show at Vulcan and who goes on stage with us but motherfucking Roseanne Barr. (laughs)

    20. TH

      Wow. What a clinic.

    21. JR

      She hadn't been on stage in years.

    22. TH

      In-

    23. JR

      In years.

    24. TH

      In a... And she killed just as hard as anybody. God, the-

    25. JR

      What I n- ... Round of applause she got when she went up there. Look at that. (laughs)

    26. TH

      Natural freak talent. Killing the whole time. Getting little tiny standing ovations throughout. Totally like the way she moved, the way she talked, her pacing, her timing felt so natural and conversational and just-

    27. JR

      But she wasn't even planning on going up.

    28. TH

      Yeah.

    29. JR

      This is what's crazy. Like, she hadn't gone on stage in years and she did it and then afterwards she, she felt fucking great. She was hanging out in the green room, she was all fired up.

    30. TH

      Yeah.

  2. 2:30 – 5:01

    Stanhope’s Onstage Drinking Myth vs. the Reality: Writing, Discipline, and Craft

    1. TH

      So fun. Hey, you wanna know something funny about this picture? You see that bottle that Stanhope has of mineral water? Well, there's cigarettes in there. You see that?

    2. JR

      Yes.

    3. TH

      A few minutes after this picture was taken, he took a huge gulp of that-

    4. JR

      Ugh.

    5. TH

      ... forgetting that it was, uh-

    6. JR

      Ough.

    7. TH

      ... an ashtray and he handled it so funny. He made sure everybody knew and he made face and like-

    8. JR

      Dude. (laughs)

    9. TH

      ... he, he really milked it like a real comedian. (laughs)

    10. JR

      We found out yesterday that Stanhope had COVID and he never even knew. He goes, "I've been dealing with COVID-like symptoms for the last 30 years."

    11. TH

      (laughs)

    12. JR

      (laughs) That's 30 years of being hungover. 30 years of being hammered mostly every day.

    13. TH

      The rare breed. Do you know how many comedians fail because he drinks on stage? There's so many comedians that think they can drink on stage and do good-

    14. JR

      Right.

    15. TH

      ... because of him. Like-

    16. JR

      Or they could be like him.

    17. TH

      Yeah.

    18. JR

      Yeah. But they don't have a point.

    19. TH

      Right.

    20. JR

      Like, he writes. The thing about Doug Stanhope is Doug Stanhope may be a guy who loves to drink. He i- well, uh, n- well, fuck maybe. He's, he, he's a guy who loves to drink.

    21. TH

      Yeah.

    22. JR

      But he also loves to write. He writes a lot. He's got a laptop, sits down with it, he makes notes, d- drinks coffee, smokes cigarettes, writes. He is dedicated to, to being a comic and a writer. He writes. And that's, uh, a lot of the guys that go on tour and try to emulate that thing, they leave out part of it. They leave out that part, you know. There's a... I've been into this audio book by Steven Pressfield, uh, The War of Art. I just finished it and now I'm on his, uh, other book that he has that's a similar sort of vein. It's called Turning Pro. But one of the things in Turning Pro, it's like talking about the things that people do to distract them from the work, and that one of the things they'll do is that a lot of people who, uh, w- they romanticize the lifestyle of being like a rock and roll star, right? Out on the road, but they're doing the drugs and, you know, they're, they're boozing and partying. That's like part of the lifestyle but what they're not doing is the writing. They're not doing the work. They're not being a pro. They're just distracting themselves with the nonsense aspects of it, the partying aspects of it. Yeah.

    23. TH

      Not the getting better at the art form aspects of it.

    24. JR

      Right.

    25. TH

      Stanhope has a good balance. He writes a lot. Like, he... you know, you see him and he's got points... There'll be something new about, you know, anything that's going on that's pertinent, that's in the news, he's got new bits.

  3. 5:01 – 6:37

    Dave Attell’s Work Ethic and the “Nothing Easy About It” Lesson

    1. JR

      Yeah. It, uh... That's... So what you're saying sort of reminds me of Dave Attell who, you know, I feel like amongst comedians is considered one of the best in the world right now. And-

    2. TH

      Well, the best of all time.

    3. JR

      Yeah. And, um, you know, he was the party guy forever.

    4. TH

      Yeah.

    5. JR

      Right? The insomniac, going out, up everywhere, and I remember... I mean, well first of all he's sober now but I remember when I got to, um, work at The Comedy Store when I started working there 15 years ago. I was also working to make extra money at a coffee shop right next to it and, um, I would work really, really, really early mornings, like the 6:00 AM to 11:00 AM shift because then I would go work phones at The Comedy Store all day and then at The Comedy Store at night, so I was just working all day. Anyway, there was a lot of times where I would be at The Comedy Store until 2:30 AM and Attell, if he was visiting from New York, would be there, you know, watching or going up or hanging out or both. And I...

    6. TH

      I would work these shifts four hours later at Starbucks, and he would be there reading the newspaper with a notebook, like, literally grinding and grueling out the work. Not on his cell phone reading, like, absorbing actual paper, you know-

    7. JR

      Yeah.

    8. TH

      ... reading material and kicking out writing immediately, like a... like someone who's about to start, not like someone who's a 20, 30-year veteran of the game. And he takes it that seriously, and it shows continuously throughout his work. You know, everybody that is great i- is doing the work.

  4. 6:37 – 10:50

    Practice, Walking, and the Creative Process: Pressfield, Stephen King, and Writers’ Rooms

    1. JR

      Yeah, there's no substitute. There's no substitute, and the- the universe rewards you. Like, life rewards you for the amount of effort you put into something. The amount of attention and focus you put into something will be- w- will be represented in how good you get at it. It doesn't mean that everybody starts from the same place. Some people have more natural talent. Some people have more natural insight. Some people are just funnier when they start. But it- it is really about the amount of time and focus you put in and how much better you get. There's a lot of people that have, like, maybe a natural personality for standup, but they're lazy, and they don't get much better because they don't write. And so, they kind of develop this sort of passable act and never really improve upon it because they don't spend the time doing it. Whereas someone who wasn't as good as them initially will be far better than them at the end.

    2. TH

      Yeah.

    3. JR

      It's just time. It's time and focus. I think that would apply to everything. I do- I think it would apply to fucking playing the guitar or writing books or whatever the fuck you're doing. It's time and effort, time and effort, and there's no substitute for those things, and thinking and being... you know, really thinking, like, being honest about what you're doing, you know, looking at it and going, "God, is this good? Like, let me look at this again. Let me look at this with fresh eyes. Let me go walk around the block and think about it," you know? That's part of it, too. One of the things that, uh, Pressfield talked about is also something that Stephen King would talk about is that he would write and then he would go for walks after the writing, which is, uh, very common amongst writers. They like to go for walks afterwards and review the notes in their head. And Pressfield would take a, a little recorder with him, but obviously you could use your phone and just use the voice memos and just talk into your phone and say, you know, "I have this thing about page five. I feel like this is off," or, "Chapter six is, you know, a little flat. Maybe- maybe this is a new solution."

    4. TH

      Yeah, walking helps a lot, no doubt. It's one of those things that we would do in the writer's room, a bunch of sloppy, lazy, bum writers in- in the roast writer's room would... We'd- (laughs) we would have to take a break because it's... the blood just circulates around your head-

    5. JR

      Yeah.

    6. TH

      ... all day, and then after four or five hours, especially after lunch, you have to get the things rolling again. So yeah, it changes perspective and it... but most importantly, it just really gets the blood flowing.

    7. JR

      Especially after lunch if you're eating bread.

    8. TH

      Yeah.

    9. JR

      Guys who eat sandwiches, like big sub sandwiches for lunch, they're useless after lunch.

    10. TH

      It's so true. And I remember we used to literally order from a place called- I don't know if it still exists in LA, but it was called It's All About The Bread.

    11. JR

      (laughs)

    12. TH

      And it was the thickest-

    13. JR

      (laughs)

    14. TH

      ... 'cause it was Jeff Ross's show basically in his office. And we know- (laughs) like anybody that knows anything about Jeff knows he doesn't give a fuck about what he eats. Like, he-

    15. JR

      Yeah.

    16. TH

      ... he's always smashing food. He has the fastest metabolism out of anybody in the world.

    17. JR

      How's that possible?

    18. TH

      I don't know. But he-

    19. JR

      But he's so big.

    20. TH

      He's big. That goes to show you how much he eats. I mean, the man is always snacking on something.

    21. JR

      Really?

    22. TH

      Yeah. He just burns it by whatever, thinking all the time or whatever is going on. But, uh... Oh, so there was just no- (laughs) there was no, like, "Let's eat something healthy today." Like, 'cause like- (laughs) he doesn't give a fuck. So, we used to order from this place, It's All About The Bread, and we would all crash so hard. We would have to drink-

    23. JR

      (laughs)

    24. TH

      ... seven cups of coffee to even come back from it. But it was like a drug. It's like doing, like, bread heroin or something-

    25. JR

      (laughs)

    26. TH

      ... in the afternoon time.

    27. JR

      Yeah, sandwiches are the worst for that.

    28. TH

      Yeah.

    29. JR

      Like, a big sub sandwich, because you think about, like, when do you ever eat a piece of bread that big?

    30. TH

      Right.

  5. 10:50 – 19:21

    Alcohol, Creativity, and Recovery: Ron White, Chappelle, and Finding Bits Through Ranting

    1. JR

      Stanhope and I were talking about this yesterday, because Stanhope had no idea that he had COVID. I- we were talking about this. I- I remember in like the brief flashes that I can remember of our drunken conversation, I was like, "I wonder how much of a factor stress plays into people getting sick, 'cause how is he okay?" Stanhope s- chain smokes, drinks constantly.

    2. TH

      Yeah.

    3. JR

      He's m- uh, basically my age, a couple of months older than me, and nothing's wrong with him, w- allegedly. Hasn't been to a doctor in years.

    4. TH

      (laughs) Yeah.

    5. JR

      Like, in forever. He goes, "Why would you go? They just fucking give you bad news." And he goes, "Just fucking live until it breaks." That's like his- his thought process. Just live until his body breaks.

    6. TH

      It was interesting, uh, watching him go face to face with Ron White last night. And the first thing that Ron said to him was, "Doug, I'm sorry. I couldn't- (laughs) I couldn't fight the fight anymore for us drunks." Like, it was... he was, like, apologizing to Doug for having to back out of the game. You know, Ron, after-

    7. JR

      Yeah.

    8. TH

      ... 50 years of daily tequila drinking, he's like, "Oh, I wish I could still be in the fight with you, my friend." (laughs)

    9. JR

      (laughs) ... meanwhile, here's the thing, like, just like Dave Attell, Ron White is better than ever.

    10. TH

      Yeah.

    11. JR

      Ron White is on fire right now. And I'd, I've never seen ... Like, he's always been a great comic, but I've never seen him better. And I think the same about Dave Attell. Dave Attell, when he stopped drinking, like I remember his boozing days, he was always great, but he's better now. He's better now. And it's, there's a thing where, like, people think that the booze is what helps them, it makes them loose and it makes them relaxed and ... Yeah, I'm, I mean, it could kind of help a little bit, it could get you loose. It can, it can, but not if it's a problem, not if it's an alcohol problem, not if, like, you need to drink all the time or you need to be drunk in a- for you to be able to go on stage. That's not ... None of those things are good. And the thing is about it, it wrecks your fucking body, man. It wrecks your body. It takes away all of your vitality, and so when it takes away your vitality, your energy to create is, like, uh, it's compromised. Your energy to just live life and to have inspired thoughts, you're fucking hurting all the time, which is even more impressive how Stanhope and Ron White were so good for all those years.

    12. TH

      Yeah, it sort of goes both ways. I feel like there's almost kind of an art, and we see this, right, with a lot of these guys, that I think there's almost something to the art of getting wasted and laying in bed the next day thinking about what's next. I'm not positive of what Chappelle's writing process is at all, but I have a feeling that he's thinking about stuff while recovering the next morning, 'cause when else would he do it? And by morning, I mean basically afternoon, right? 'Cause he goes hard in the paint. He has a lot of fun.

    13. JR

      Yeah.

    14. TH

      And, uh, you know, we see it on stage all the time. At The Comedy Store, he would, you know, just plow through bottles of Corona.

    15. JR

      Yeah.

    16. TH

      Another Corona, another Corona-

    17. JR

      Yeah.

    18. TH

      ... another Corona, and he stays in the zone. He's hilarious. But the- obviously, he's not coming up with this stuff right off the top of his head in the moment. It- the magician always has his stuff set up.

    19. JR

      Right.

    20. TH

      So, like, there's almost something to it, and I'd be interested to know, maybe you know what Doug's process is, but it seems like laying in bed that next morning with a hangover and being- thinking of something that really stands out to you might sort of be good for that art form. Because if it- if you- if you can make it funny then, if you could think about it then with a headache and your body's sore and you don't want to get out of bed, then it must be funny, right? Does that kind of make sense?

    21. JR

      Kind of. Uh, what Doug does, one of the things that Doug does is his podcast. And Doug's podcast is basically ... I mean, occasionally he has guests on, but oftentimes, it's just him and his buddies, right? So they're all hanging around the house and they have, you know, they're at the fun house and they have the setup there, and it's basically Doug holding court talking about things-

    22. TH

      Mm-hmm.

    23. JR

      ... in, in a similar vein to the way Bill Burr creates on his podcast, 'cause Bill Burr is one of the most prolific comics, and I'm pretty sure the way he writes is he thinks about stuff, he has things that piss him off, and then he goes on his podcast and rants about them. And in that ranting, the constant ranting, he creates these things that are like, "Oh, there's like a glimmer of light in that. There's like a beacon of hope in this bit. Let me turn that into, uh, an actual routine." And then he'll ... I've seen him on stage and I've seen stuff that I've listened to him talk about on his podcast he then brings to the stage and he refines it and he makes it better.

    24. TH

      Yeah, he's incredible. I once made the, uh ... I once made an interesting, um, rookie mistake when I was, again, back when I was a door guy at the store. He, uh ... I had never spoken with him before really, and I had never said anything to him, and he said hi to me one night after he performed on stage, and it absolutely killed so hard. I can't remember what the news story was at the time, but something had just happened days earlier, and he was killing for 10 minutes about it. And he came up and he said hi as I'm on the stool on his way to his car in the parking lot, I'm working the back door, and since he said hi to me, I decided to engage and I said something like, "Hey, man, I just wanted to let you know, that was amazing up there. It's crazy how easily you could take something that just happened and, and kill with it like that." And he goes, "Easy." I'm like, "Yeah?" He goes, "There's nothing easy about that. I've been writing every day since that happened for the last three days. From 9:00 to 4:00 PM, I've been writing. So while you've been doing whatever you've been doing, like nothing is easy. There's nothing easy about it. I sat down and I wrote all that." Like, he, like, taught me, like, an amazing lesson.

    25. JR

      Hmm. Yeah.

    26. TH

      It was really cool. And I was just trying to give him this compliment, and instead he gave me, you know-

    27. JR

      Yeah.

    28. TH

      ... a really, really great insight on how that world works. And you see it with The Last Dance, you know, Jordan practicing all the time, staying after practice, arriving early to practice. It, there, it's a constant. The same with the Tiger Woods documentary. You find out, oh, oh, all he does is practice. All these people that do all these things, it's work.

    29. JR

      Yeah. That's, um, also another book that I've finished again recently that I've reread is Malcolm Gladwell's Outliers. Same thing. The putting in the time, like what makes someone exceptional, what's th- what makes someone stand out from anyone else. And one of the things he talked about is The Beatles and how often The Beatles would play when they were in Hamburg, that they would play eight hours a day.

    30. TH

      Wow.

  6. 19:21 – 23:32

    Dave Chappelle Attacked Onstage: Security Failures and Culture War Framing of Jokes

    1. JR

      So this fucking Dave Chappelle thing's crazy. Uh, last night, I guess it was-

    2. TH

      Yeah.

    3. JR

      ... someone attacked him at the Hollywood Bowl. He's fine. I checked in with him today. He was laughing about it. He's, uh, in good spirits. He was... There, there's a video actually. He's, he was laughing like right afterwards.

    4. TH

      Yeah.

    5. JR

      'Cause Jamie Foxx apparently had a cowboy hat and he jumped on stage to help. (laughs)

    6. TH

      (laughs)

    7. JR

      Jamie Foxx with a cowboy hat jumped on stage to fuck that dude up. The guy was, uh, five foot... That, that arm's broken by the way.

    8. NA

      Definitely.

    9. JR

      That, that arm's fucked. The, it is also like the way they led him into the, um, the... Like, when he got into the actual stretcher, you could see he is fucked.

    10. TH

      It's so funny. You can tell the type of beat up that somebody is when they're getting kicked on the ground (laughs) by different, from different angles by different people.

    11. JR

      Yeah.

    12. TH

      It's a different type of like beat up look.

    13. JR

      Yeah.

    14. TH

      You could tell that that left, that that left side of his face was the side that was either on the ground or totally like away from everything.

    15. JR

      (laughs) On the other side was getting punched.

    16. TH

      Just everything's swollen on the one side.

    17. JR

      Yeah. Yeah. He's fucked. That guy, he made... Jesus Christ.

    18. TH

      You could tell. You can always tell because the... Did you, you saw the actual video?

    19. JR

      I saw the video. First of all, Dave Chappelle has good hips, 'cause-

    20. TH

      Yeah.

    21. JR

      ... he, the guy shoots in on him.

    22. TH

      Yeah, he almost sprawled on him. (laughs)

    23. JR

      And he kind of turned with him. He kind of kung-fu'd him.

    24. TH

      Yeah.

    25. JR

      He gave him a little Aikido. (laughs)

    26. TH

      (laughs)

    27. JR

      Have you watched the video? As the guy's coming in, he's coming in this way and Dave kind of like turns a little.

    28. TH

      And it's balls too. Chappelle's a big boy. Bigger than you think he is.

    29. JR

      Well, the guy's crazy, clearly.

    30. TH

      Yeah.

  7. 23:32 – 34:29

    Biden Clip, Polarization, and the Press Secretary ‘Gotcha’ Ecosystem

    1. JR

      ... about trans rights and about use of bathrooms and about, uh, uh, y- you know, trans kids. And the White House talks about it. And Jen Psaki was doing an interview and she was crying about it, sort of misrepresenting what the don't say qu- supposedly don't say gay bill in Florida, which isn't do- don't say gay. You know, this is, uh... It's a weird time because we, we have to be able to look through the fog, the fog of the anger that we have for the opposite or the anger we have for the opponent. Because the way that the Democrats and the way that Republicans look at it today is...... there's us and there's them, and it's so polarized that anytime something comes up, anything, like we'll, these, these subjects, like, you wanna find out what side is on what side of the issue. Like, is, is my side on this is okay, or is my side on this is a, a bad thing? And that's a lot of what happens with these subjects. Instead of just being able to look at things and just honestly discuss things, things get fit into this polarized lens. Like, somehow or another, Biden was talking about that today. He was talking about, um, he was talking about the, uh, Roe versus Wade thing, and he's, he said something like, "What's next? Uh, are we gonna stop LBGTQ kids from going to classes with regular kids?" And then he said, "This MAGA group is the most extreme political group in US history." So, think, look at the way he connected those. Like, see if you can find that video. I believe I can send it to you if you don't, if you can't find it. You got it?

    2. TH

      There it is.

    3. JR

      Okay. But let me see if it says the whole thing he says about LBGTQ kids first, 'cause that's what he says first. I can send it to you, Jamie, how about?

    4. NA

      Yeah, he has it.

    5. JR

      Okay, let me hear it, hear it. Here it goes.

    6. NA

      ... uh, state ch- changed the law saying that, that, that children who are LGBTQ can't be in classrooms with other children. Is that l- is that legit under the way the, the decision's written? What are the next things that are gonna be attacked? Because this MAGA crowd is really the most extreme political ex- organization that's existed in American history.

    7. JR

      Okay. No, that is-

    8. NA

      Racists are gonna be attacked. ............................

    9. JR

      ... that's a crazy connection.

    10. TH

      Yeah.

    11. JR

      What he just did is a crazy connection. He went from Roe versus Wade, which I don't know what's happening with that. I don't know if that's real, that supposedly something was leaked that said they're gonna overturn Roe versus Wade. I don't, you know, I, I don't think that's been substantiated. Has that been substantiated?

    12. NA

      Uh, I believe it's still, uh, yeah, it was leaked, and I don't think-

    13. JR

      It's not substantiated though, right? It's not like-

    14. NA

      As far as like an official decision, I don't think so.

    15. JR

      Right. So, so you have something that has to do with abortion rights, so it's women's rights. And then how does he connect that to MAGA? Like, how does that, like the, look at that way he did that. Like, saying that you cannot have an abortion o- or abortion's not a federally, federally protected thing under Roe versus Wade anymore, going from that to saying what if they decide to keep LBGTQ kids out of classes to this MAGA crowd's the most extreme political organization in American history. Like, what? How did you get there?

    16. TH

      Right.

    17. JR

      How did you get to MAGA?

    18. TH

      Yeah, 'cause that, that's the slogan of his opponent.

    19. JR

      I guarantee you, there's some never-Trump Republicans that are pro-life. I guarantee you.

    20. TH

      Oh, yeah.

    21. JR

      There's people that don't like the way Trump behaves and talks, and they, they don't think that he's a God-fearing Christian, and there's a lot of those folks out there.

    22. TH

      Ton of 'em.

    23. JR

      There's a lot of those fol-... This, this idea that everybody falls into this, uh, y- like, it's all the MAGA, it's all the s-... Like, if you have any Republican viewpoints or if you have a, any conservative viewpoints, that's a sneaky way of, uh, connecting any conservative viewpoints with Trump, which is like, you know, half the people are gonna hate it. I- i- if you can convince half the people that any idea is a Trump idea, they will immediately ha- hate it. Half the people, right?

    24. TH

      Mm-hmm.

    25. JR

      If they're not paying attention, they're just reading headlines, half the people will, like, categorize that, "That's a Trump idea. That's a MAGA thing." It's kind of an amazing way to dismiss things now. You know, because it used to be people could be conservative. They could be like William F. Buckley and they could have c- conservative debates on television with Gore Vidal and people would think it was normal. There's a conservative, there's a liberal, they're discussing issues. It's cool to, I may be, see me, w- what resonates with me more. Not anymore, baby. Not anymore, because now, because of this whole Trump thing and the MAGA thing, they have... It's not just conservative versus liberal. It's like you can put it into this cult of personality, this Trump box, and then you get a 50% return rate on your investment (laughs) .

    26. TH

      Yeah.

    27. JR

      Half the people are gonna be like, "This is, fuck that, that's a Trump thing. That's a MAGA thing."

    28. TH

      Yeah, it's super weird. It's k- it's crazy. And I think that he may have said that because maybe he's, you know, preemptively and always, I think he's always going to have to worry about the next election.

    29. JR

      I think he's, I think he's having a hard time keeping sentences.

    30. TH

      Yeah.

  8. 34:29 – 48:05

    Border Reality Check: Cartels, Migrant Caravans, Deportations, and Detention Footage

    1. JR

      Yeah. That's what we should all be paying attention to, by the way, ladies and gentlemen. And this is not saying from a, from a person who's a xenophobic. I'm not, uh, worried about Mexican immigrants. I'm worried about Mexican cartels. I'm worried about the people that stay in Mexico. (laughs) Like, Mexico is crazy right now. I pay attention to quite a few news pages that are covering the cartel wars. And it's wild, man. It's wild. There's all kinds of shootings down there.

    2. TH

      Oh, yeah. Uh-

    3. JR

      There's shootings in Mexico all the time now, and there's basically gigantic, multi-billion dollar drug rings, and they're going to war with each other. And there's a lot of them, folks, because there's a giant market for fentanyl and cocaine and marijuana and everything else that's illegal in the United States that comes up from Mexico. And because of our drug laws, this is what finances these organized crime gr- gangs. And now they've gotten so big and they're ruthless. They don't have laws that they have to uphold. It's not like, you know, being a part of Raytheon or being a part of fucking, you know, some other American corporation. This is, this is a gang that has billions of dollars. It's a fucking drug gang that has billions of dollars. And-... who knows how many sneaky connections with corrupt officials that allow it to exist? Who knows how many people are profiting so that this stuff gets into America and keeps being distributed to America? And it's right there, and n- nobody's talking about it. All anybody talks about is the poor people that are trying to sneak across for a better life, and how horrible it is that some people don't want them to come across, and how compassionate these people that want to help them are. That's the, that's what the main focus is on. But there's also, like, terrorists sneaking in. They've caught terrorists.

    4. TH

      Right.

    5. JR

      Yeah. I mean, that's how they're... That-

    6. TH

      Oh, yeah. They're coming right up.

    7. JR

      It's a great way to do it.

    8. TH

      Yeah, totally. I was in Miami last weekend or two weeks ago and hung out with my really good friend who I've known for years and years. He's Cuban. And, uh, he's like, "Hey, uh, come over Saturday. Bring the whole crew." And I did. I, uh, we all went, me, William. We, uh... His mom made us this amazing Cuban dinner at this amazing house that they've had forever in Florida for... It's been in their family for three decades or whatever. And it's just the coolest, most homestyle meal, and they have a, they have a couple cousins who just came from Cuba, um, there. And we're talking with them and, and the- the rest of the family, mom and the- and my friend are sort of semi-translating things that they don't get in between because we're talking about it, and, uh, they said that they had to go through five countries. So they had to whatever over to... What is it considered? South America, right? What's below...

    9. JR

      Well, uh, uh, Cuba's not connected to anything, so it depends on what direction.

    10. TH

      Right. No, not Cuba. They, they had to go due, uh, west and come up that way, and they said they had to go through five countries. So what's south of Mexico? Brazil, right? Where are we?

    11. JR

      Yeah, yeah. So they came through Mexico. Is that what you're saying? I thought you were saying Cuba.

    12. TH

      They're from Cuba.

    13. JR

      Right.

    14. TH

      But to get to America-

    15. JR

      They came through Mexico.

    16. TH

      They had to go through Mexico.

    17. JR

      I'm sorry, I spaced out.

    18. TH

      But to get to Mexico, they had to go through blank, through blank-

    19. JR

      Oh, right, right, right.

    20. TH

      ... blank, blank, blank. They had to start all the way down there.

    21. JR

      There it is. That, you know, that's what that whole convoy was. You remember that, that giant... What, what'd they call it? They didn't call it a convoy. What'd they call it when the people were coming up from Mexico? They were f- watching them come.

    22. TH

      Caravan?

    23. JR

      Caravan?

    24. NA

      Yeah, yeah.

    25. JR

      So show that again, that map, please. When you look at that, these people were coming up. See where Mexico is? People were coming up from Guatemala, from Honduras. They were, they were getting all these people and they were walking all the way up into Mexico. Now, how do you think something like that happens? How do you think you get all these families, and, you know, kids and parents and everyone all together to just start walking up there? If we all walk, we're going to make it. Like, how does that work?

    26. TH

      I, I can't even begin to fathom.

    27. JR

      Who, who puts that together? Is that organizers? Is there like a, a clandestine purpose for something like that? Is there someone pulling the strings behind that going, "Listen, we're going to organize and we're going to get all these people and just bum rush the fence. We're gonna talk them into it. We're gonna, like, give them food and water and take care of them along the way. And they're- We're gonna make a lot of press available to this. So they're going to come in and take photos and videos. We'll get it all up on the internet and get it all up on YouTube and in the news, and then people will know." I mean, how, it can't... How would these people know each other in different countries? Are they talking online? They all getting together on Reddit and they're trying to figure out where to meet? What are they doing?

    28. TH

      Yeah.

    29. JR

      How is this happening? Who organizes that? Like how... And where'd it go? Just stopped.

    30. TH

      One of the things that I found extra interesting was the fact that they had to pay. There's a certain, there's like a ticket fee for America. Basically, once they stop you at the thing... What I found out from hanging out with this family, this Cuban family in, um, Miami was that it's, there's, it's a ticket. It's like 15,000. I'm like, so what makes the dif- Is... You have to... So basically you have to have a family member, someone like that you can call that's here, like the cousin in Miami, and say, "Yes, that is my cousin. I will take care of them. I'll give them a start. They can st- I have an extra bedroom they can stay in." "Okay, you can pay the 15,000 to get them over the other end."

  9. 48:05 – 54:42

    How the Cartel Pipeline Works: Tunnels, Dirty Cops, Guns Flowing South, and China’s Role

    1. JR

      That's a good way to look at it, right? Because we've done 6,000 seat, uh, arenas and theaters, and you can see it in your head what 6,000 looks like. You know? Fuck, man. But of course they are. Of course they're doing that. Anybody that doesn't think they should be doing that, you don't live there. If you lived there, you would think you should be doing that. 100%. Recently, an average of around 1,500 people daily have evaded law enforcement at the border. The number of so-called gotaways that the agency detects through a variety of technological and other tracking efforts, according to the official. I don't like the way they're saying that.

    2. NA

      I know. It's-

    3. JR

      What do you, what do you got? Fucking satellites watching the border? It's all... I mean, if you were of the tinfoil hat, you know, if you were of that persuasion, you would look at this and you'd go, "You guys, why aren't you having, why haven't you fixed that? Are you... Do you want people to come across? Do you want it to be easy? Is that how the drugs get over here?" Like, what is... How do the drugs get over here?

    4. NA

      Yeah, I mean-

    5. JR

      They bust them with tunnels every now and again.

    6. NA

      Mm-hmm.

    7. JR

      You know, which are wild. The one that they found in Tijuana, did you see that one? Bro, it was the most, like... The, the most sophisticated drug tunnel they've ever discovered. It had lights.

    8. NA

      Wow. Where did-

    9. JR

      You wanna see that?

    10. NA

      Where did it go to?

    11. JR

      Um, I'm not sure. They've... There's quite a few of them, though. They find them all the time. 'Cause you have to realize the amount of money that the cartel has. Or the cartels, excuse me, have. There's so many of them. And they're selling billions and billions of dollars worth of drugs every year. They're selling fentanyl, and they're selling fake Xanax, and they're selling... And, you know, it's just... There's a never-ending thirst to escape your normal state of consciousness. And all they have to do is get us the supplies. And they can have helicopters and hippos and tanks (laughs) and machine guns.

    12. NA

      Crazy. It's a tunnel. I don't... It doesn't say how long it was.

    13. JR

      Record-long tunnel found on US-Mexico border. How long was it? Does it say?

    14. NA

      It doesn't say. I was trying to find out by going into more of the information about-

    15. JR

      I- It's so funny how easy it is to get into Mexico. You're just like, "Hi." You just wave. (laughs)

    16. NA

      (laughs)

    17. JR

      Hi.

    18. NA

      What does it say?

    19. JR

      Um, Mariana Van Zeller, she's a woman that, uh... Uh, she's been on my podcast a couple of times, and, um, she has this show. What's her new show called? Trafficked?

    20. NA

      Trafficked, yeah.

    21. JR

      And, uh-

    22. NA

      183 feet.

    23. JR

      180-foot-long subterranean tunnel found in Mexicali, Baja California, near the border. Wow. Um, but she, uh... What was I gonna say about her? Goddammit.

    24. NA

      Drugs, Mexico.

    25. JR

      I know.

    26. NA

      Traffic.

    27. JR

      I'm trying to remember what my point was.

    28. NA

      The tunnel.

    29. JR

      Fuck, I lost it. Goddammit. It's the Mike Tyson marijuana.

    30. NA

      Mm-hmm.

  10. 54:42 – 59:17

    China’s Entertainment Influence + Global Box Office Pressures (Cena Apology, Marvel Edits)

    1. JR

      Meanwhile, in China, get on TikTok and it's showing athletic achievements, science accomplishments. You know, they're showing people, uh, you know, how to, how to create and how to be inspired and how to really contribute to your country. Their, their big moves are all mov- uh, the big movies, rather, are all movies where a Chinese guy kicks the shit out of an American.

    2. TH

      Is that true?

    3. JR

      (laughs)

    4. TH

      Are we the bad guy over there?

    5. JR

      Yes, yes. (laughs)

    6. TH

      Oh, man.

    7. JR

      Not, we're not just the bad guy. In, um, Spider-Man, the recent Spider-Man, when they tried to send it over to, uh, China, China did not want the scene where, uh, they fought on the Statue of Liberty. They didn't want the Statue of Liberty in there.

    8. TH

      Wow.

    9. JR

      Like, "Take it out of the movie."

    10. TH

      (laughs) Did, did they take it out?

    11. JR

      And, and Marvel was like, "No."

    12. TH

      (laughs)

    13. JR

      Marvel said, "No. We're drawing a line in the sand."

    14. TH

      (coughs)

    15. JR

      Ooh.

    16. TH

      Wow.

    17. JR

      'Cause China dictates a lot of stuff in terms of like what gets done in movies. Like, they change scripts for the way the Chinese people, uh, like, if they, you know, say they're not gonna buy this or it's not, you know, they're, they're not gonna allow it in their market, 'cause they can not allow a movie. If there's a movie that the Chinese government doesn't approve of, they go, "Fuck that movie." (laughs) And that's it. You don't get in. And then if you're a movie business, the amount of money... Like, one, one thing we found after John Cena apologized to China in Mandarin-

    18. TH

      Mm-hmm.

    19. JR

      ... we looked it up. The amount of money that that movie made opening weekend in China was the vast majority of the money.

    20. TH

      Yeah.

    21. JR

      It was something like they made $160 million opening week and $140 of it was from China.

    22. TH

      Yeah.

    23. JR

      And I was like, "Oh, no." You hear that and you go, "Oh, wow."

    24. TH

      Yeah.

    25. JR

      Okay.

    26. TH

      Anybody will apologize in Mandarin for that kind of money. (laughs)

    27. JR

      Oh, I've learned Mandarin. I learned the shit out of some Mandarin. What does it say here?

    28. TH

      (laughs)

    29. JR

      Domestic b- is this from that movie?

    30. NA

      Mm-hmm.

  11. 59:17 – 1:11:39

    Actors, Fame, and ‘Crazy’ Genius: Mel Gibson, Roseanne, Will Smith, and Depp vs. Heard

    1. TH

      You wanna know what's really great though? And I can't remember. I think we talked about this. I can't remember whether you said you saw it or didn't see it. But Mel Gibson plays Santa Claus.

    2. JR

      No, I haven't seen it.

    3. TH

      (laughs) Oh, dude, it's-

    4. JR

      Is it really good?

    5. TH

      I can't wait until next Christmas only to watch this movie-

    6. JR

      (laughs)

    7. TH

      ... in like a Christmassy vibe again. And I just saw it this past one and it is so cool. It's like he actually plays like the most badass Santa of all time who's actually, you know, at the North Pole and is a real guy. Dude, it's the coolest. It is like John Wick meets Christmas.

    8. JR

      Yeah, I saw the, uh, preview for it. It looked pretty funny, like interesting.

    9. TH

      And the way they've s- they have just enough Christmas magic in it mixed with all these (laughs) crazy guns and he has a serious threat-

    10. JR

      (laughs)

    11. TH

      ... like military-grade threat. And-

    12. JR

      Santa Claus drives a red old pickup truck? That Santa Claus?

    13. TH

      Dude, it's so cool.... they made him like a real guy.

    14. JR

      I'm glad Mel Gibson made a comeback. I was bummed-

    15. TH

      Yeah.

    16. JR

      ... out at him, getting arrested and saying a bunch of wild shit about Jews. (laughs)

    17. TH

      (laughs)

    18. JR

      I love that dude. I love his work.

    19. TH

      Yeah.

    20. JR

      He's a hell of a movie maker. I mean, he's a crazy dude, but you- I think you need to be crazy to be that good of an actor. You know, I mean, watch him in Braveheart and tell me what sane guy you want playing that role.

    21. TH

      Right.

    22. JR

      You know? There's- there's certain moments that could be achieved in film only through madmen and madwomen.

    23. TH

      Yeah.

    24. JR

      You need wild people.

    25. TH

      Watching Roseanne last night-

    26. JR

      (laughs)

    27. TH

      ... made me feel that at a thousand miles an hour, right?

    28. JR

      Yeah.

    29. TH

      'Cause she- I'm- I'm thinking to myself, "Well, this- it's been a while since she's done it. She's one of the GOATS. But it's been a while since she's done it."

    30. JR

      Yeah.

  12. 1:11:39 – 1:17:21

    Health Discipline Detour: Hot Yoga, Heat Adaptation, and Etiquette Pet Peeves

    1. TH

      Yeah, absolutely. Today I have scheduled a, uh... It's May 4th, so there's a special Star Wars hot yoga going down tonight-

    2. JR

      (laughs)

    3. TH

      ... in downtown Austin that I'm going to be taking part in.

    4. JR

      Yeah.

    5. TH

      No shame in my game.

    6. JR

      May the 4th be with you, that's right.

    7. TH

      Yeah, yeah, so...

    8. JR

      I forgot about that. It's today.

    9. TH

      I'm pumped about that. That's been fun lately. Hot yoga is crazy, man.

    10. JR

      Yeah, it is crazy.

    11. TH

      It's-

    12. JR

      Hot yoga's the best.

    13. TH

      It is a miserable, miserable hour in which, just like any workout, that first 10 minutes is like, "What am I doing? This was a mistake."

    14. JR

      Mm-hmm.

    15. TH

      And then something clicks in and it just, whish...

    16. JR

      And if you can make that 30... You know, that last 30 minutes.

    17. TH

      Yeah.

    18. JR

      Last 30 minutes is rough.

    19. TH

      Yeah.

    20. JR

      You do a 90-minute yoga class and it's 105 degrees, that last 30 minutes is fucking rough.

    21. TH

      And you're dripping.

    22. JR

      Yeah.

    23. TH

      Continuous drips. I, I looked the other day...... and there was a moment where I, like, saw five drops come off me at once.

    24. JR

      Mm-hmm.

    25. TH

      Whatever I was doing, and I'm like, "Maybe this is ... Maybe I'm going too hard. Maybe this is too much." And then immediately I'm like, "Nah, come on. Let's go." Some pe- what are you gonna die? In-

    26. JR

      Do you bring, like, a Hydro Flask with you filled with ice water?

    27. TH

      Just a regular bottle of water.

    28. JR

      Yeah?

    29. TH

      Yeah, it does, it gets warm throughout its-

    30. JR

      Dude, listen to me.

Episode duration: 2:42:12

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