Joe Rogan Experience #1860 - Tim Dillon

1. 0:00 – 15:00

   (drumming) Joe Rogan podcast,…

   1. JRJoe Rogan0:00

      (drumming) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out. The Joe Rogan Experience. Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. (rock music) Oh, hi, Tim Dillon.

   2. TDTim Dillon0:13

      Joe Rogan-

   3. JRJoe Rogan0:14

      (laughs)

   4. TDTim Dillon0:14

      ... thank you for having me.

   5. JRJoe Rogan0:15

      My pleasure.

   6. TDTim Dillon0:16

      Thank you for having me, sir. I appreciate it.

   7. JRJoe Rogan0:18

      My pleasure. That was-

   8. TDTim Dillon0:19

      Dr-

   9. JRJoe Rogan0:19

      ... fun, going over to the club.

   10. TDTim Dillon0:21

       It was amazing. It's gonna be great.

   11. JRJoe Rogan0:23

       Looks exciting.

   12. TDTim Dillon0:23

       It's gonna be great. I'm excited about it. I'm excited and, uh, Louie was there.

   13. JRJoe Rogan0:28

       I'm glad we got him to look at too, he has some-

   14. TDTim Dillon0:30

       Yeah.

   15. JRJoe Rogan0:30

       ... great notes.

   16. TDTim Dillon0:31

       He's been, what would you say, 30 something? I mean, you guys have been around the same time, do you know?

   17. JRJoe Rogan0:35

       Yeah, he was a little bit before me but he's gotta be 35 years in now.

   18. TDTim Dillon0:39

       So, he's been to every, every configuration of a comedy venue.

   19. JRJoe Rogan0:43

       Yeah.

   20. TDTim Dillon0:44

       So, and so have you probably. So you guys, hearing you guys talk about this place and that place, you now have all the benefit of all that knowledge to make your spot amazing.

   21. JRJoe Rogan0:53

       And we're doing it from scratch.

   22. TDTim Dillon0:55

       Right.

   23. JRJoe Rogan0:55

       So we can just adjust, change, do things.

   24. TDTim Dillon0:57

       Yeah.

   25. JRJoe Rogan0:58

       Like, he had really good notes today.

   26. TDTim Dillon0:59

       You have the money, you have the time, it's-

   27. JRJoe Rogan1:01

       Yeah.

   28. TDTim Dillon1:01

       ... you have everything that would make it perfect.

   29. JRJoe Rogan1:03

       It's exciting.

   30. TDTim Dillon1:04

       What about C- Cap City's gonna open too.
2. 15:00 – 30:00

   Right. …

   1. TDTim Dillon15:00

      just ... With a few good decisions, with a few good decisions-

   2. JRJoe Rogan15:03

      Right.

   3. TDTim Dillon15:04

      You're ... I mean, you're, you've, you're ... You got a B. You're gonna get a billion.

   4. JRJoe Rogan15:07

      Ooh.

   5. TDTim Dillon15:07

      And Kevin could too, but you're, you're up there and it's w- it's wild to see, you know?

   6. JRJoe Rogan15:13

      Yeah.

   7. TDTim Dillon15:13

      It's g- And you deserve it, but, you know, I'm horribly jealous.

   8. JRJoe Rogan15:18

      (laughs)

   9. TDTim Dillon15:20

      And ev- every minute I say, "It should be me."

   10. JRJoe Rogan15:23

       (laughs) "It should be me."

   11. TDTim Dillon15:24

       Like, every minute. I tell Ben, I go, "It should be me."

   12. JRJoe Rogan15:27

       Well, you're already on a fucking pretty-

   13. TDTim Dillon15:29

       Oh, Patreon?

   14. JRJoe Rogan15:30

       ... stratospheric ride.

   15. TDTim Dillon15:31

       That's nothing. That's embarrassing, but you're on the way up.

   16. JRJoe Rogan15:34

       Yeah, but you're on the way up.

   17. TDTim Dillon15:34

       Well, that's very nice of you to say.

   18. JRJoe Rogan15:35

       Yeah, it's ... This is just the beginning. I mean, if you go back onto my podcast 10 years ago, I wasn't making any money.

   19. TDTim Dillon15:40

       Well, i- what's weird right now is that, like ... It is weird. We were just talking about, like ... Society is w- weird in the sense that there is a lot of money and then there's a lot of problems, and we're learning that money doesn't fix all the problems. This is something interesting.

   20. JRJoe Rogan15:58

       Yeah.

   21. TDTim Dillon15:58

       You can throw money at things and it's not fixed, right?

   22. JRJoe Rogan16:00

       Sometimes it creates problems.

   23. TDTim Dillon16:01

       Sometimes it creates problems. And then you're at a very interesting place where you go, "Well, California's got a $21 billion surplus." And you go, "You should be able to just fic- fix it." Homelessness, whatever.

   24. JRJoe Rogan16:14

       Yeah.

   25. TDTim Dillon16:14

       $21 billion, more than you thought you would have. But, you realize that human beings gum that system up a lot and you go, "Oh, it's not as easy as we think to just fix something with money." You know?

   26. JRJoe Rogan16:27

       How does California ever get fixed? 'Cause when we were just talking about it in the lobby about-

   27. TDTim Dillon16:31

       Yeah. It has the most stunning natural beauty of any state. It has so many things that are positive, but then there are so many problems, and those problems seem insurmountable.

   28. JRJoe Rogan16:46

       Now.

   29. TDTim Dillon16:46

       Now.

   30. JRJoe Rogan16:47

       But they didn't three, four years ago.
3. 30:00 – 45:00

   It's definitely a good…

   1. TDTim Dillon30:00

      go, "What the fuck?" And people need to situate themselves in the universe and they don't know how to do it. And they're going, "Dude, I'm... Like, this rock is spinning and I don't know what's going on." And e- every day, there's a new edict about what you can say, what's real and what's not, and people are going back to things that root them, and one of them is religion. And I think religion has a lot of positives. I mean, there's some negatives, but I think r- religion has positives, for sure.

   2. JRJoe Rogan30:27

      It's definitely a good moral scaffolding for a lot of people.

   3. TDTim Dillon30:29

      You need something to ground you, make you humble, make you realize that you are living, uh, for a finite amount of time on Earth. You should treat people with respect. There's c- a code is good, to have a moral code. I'm not saying what yours should be or not. But just the constant stuffing money down your throat, having tons of meaningless sex, you know, constantly obsessing over material things, these are probably a...... ultimately spiritually empty things.

   4. JRJoe Rogan31:01

      Definitely.

   5. TDTim Dillon31:01

      Yeah.

   6. JRJoe Rogan31:02

      Yeah.

   7. TDTim Dillon31:02

      I'm starting a church, by the way.

   8. JRJoe Rogan31:04

      That's the only way to get out of this. We need a new church.

   9. TDTim Dillon31:06

      We need a new church, and me and Caitlyn Jenner are starting a church. It, uh, it's for progressive rich people-

   10. JRJoe Rogan31:13

       (laughs)

   11. TDTim Dillon31:13

       ... that are also racist.

   12. JRJoe Rogan31:15

       (laughs)

   13. TDTim Dillon31:16

       It's important to have a, a religion that recognizes, as a gay person who doesn't really... You know, gays are fine, and Caitlyn doesn't really like trans people. So, we are the figureheads of the church, and we are ministering mainly to rich heterosexuals.

   14. JRJoe Rogan31:32

       Do you get heat from the gay population?

   15. NANarrator31:34

       (clapping)

   16. TDTim Dillon31:34

       The, the gay people get upset at you?

   17. JRJoe Rogan31:35

       No, they don't really care that much. I mean, they would if they knew more about me.

   18. TDTim Dillon31:41

       (laughs)

   19. JRJoe Rogan31:41

       But they're just, they're in their own world. Everyone's in their own world now.

   20. TDTim Dillon31:44

       Yeah.

   21. JRJoe Rogan31:45

       So if you're in my little podcast world, you're in that. If you're in a other world, if you watch SNL, it's a different world. We're on a different planet. If you watch SNL every week, like, like put it on and go, "Ah!" Like if you're... Then we're on a dif- You don't know, you don't know who I am. And you would hate me if you knew about me, but you don't even know who I am. So everybody's kind of doing their own thing. And if you listen to me every week, or if you watch me and Christina and Tom on the live stream watch people, like, crush penises with stilettos or whatever those sick fucks are watching.

   22. TDTim Dillon32:18

       (sighs)

   23. JRJoe Rogan32:18

       I mean, then yeah, it's just different worlds. What they're doing over there at your mom's house-

   24. TDTim Dillon32:23

       It's brilliant.

   25. JRJoe Rogan32:23

       ... is fucking wild.

   26. TDTim Dillon32:24

       It's wild.

   27. JRJoe Rogan32:25

       It's wild. No one's ever done it before, to have a pay-per-view completely uncensored. I mean, it's like the worst of LiveLeak-

   28. TDTim Dillon32:33

       Yes.

   29. JRJoe Rogan32:33

       ... the worst of...

   30. TDTim Dillon32:34

       It feels very old school internet.
4. 45:00 – 1:00:00

   What do we have?…

   1. TDTim Dillon45:00

      We're like, "They have supersonic weapons." We're the only ones who've used the fucking weapons. We're the only ones who've really used nukes. So, I'm pretty sure that whatever some monster thought of, we also have. We've also got a lot of shit.

   2. JRJoe Rogan45:11

      What do we have? Does the US have supersonic weapons?

   3. TDTim Dillon45:12

      Well, we won't even know. We don't know what we have.

   4. JRJoe Rogan45:14

      I think they said they're testing them, right? Haven't they said that?

   5. TDTim Dillon45:18

      (laughs)

   6. JVJamie Vernon45:18

      I- I- Yes, but we also wouldn't know what the fuck we have.

   7. JRJoe Rogan45:22

      We don't know what we have.

   8. TDTim Dillon45:22

      Right.

   9. JVJamie Vernon45:22

      They fucking test.

   10. JRJoe Rogan45:23

       That's the problem.

   11. TDTim Dillon45:24

       Who knows what we have? But w- w- we gotta get on the same page here. You know what I mean? Like, we need to just fucking cut the bullshit. Stop. Just have fucking rules. Stop with the, you can be trans when you're 17.

   12. JRJoe Rogan45:42

       17?

   13. TDTim Dillon45:43

       17, but not fully. You have to do a summer of, like, fake trans, and then 18, as soon as we'll d- If- If- If we can draft you into war, you can go chop yourself, but you're going to war. You know what I mean? Trans people get free operations, but they do two years in the military.

   14. JRJoe Rogan46:01

       (laughs)

   15. TDTim Dillon46:01

       Boom. Done. Done. It's over. Roe v. Wade, you have to have your children, but you have to give the babies. We have to have them. They give- They go right into, like, some... We conscript them into something. They go mine Bitcoin or whatever.

   16. JRJoe Rogan46:15

       (laughs)

   17. TDTim Dillon46:15

       Have to have your baby, we take it now. Property of the state. Fine. Be more responsible. There's ways to do it. We can solve all these problems. Y- Here's the thing with the cops. They- You can't defund them, they have to be there, but you should be able to slap them occasionally. Citizens should be able to slap the police and the police can't do anything back. So there's gotta be ways and rules to fix it, 'cause otherwise we're just gonna have all these problems forever. You know?

   18. JRJoe Rogan46:40

       But what kind of... Like, in all seriousness-

   19. TDTim Dillon46:43

       Yes.

   20. JRJoe Rogan46:43

       ... what kind of rules could be established that would unite people?

   21. TDTim Dillon46:46

       Well, I-

   22. JRJoe Rogan46:47

       Is it a rule thing or is it a leader thing? Like, if we had a leader that united people.

   23. TDTim Dillon46:50

       You need a leader. You need somebody who can say, "Listen, everybody..." 'Cause everybody is both things inside of them, like, whether they know it or not. Like, everybody is a psychopathic Texas gun nut and everybody is a fat, blue-haired dyke in Portland. We all have those two things in us. We all have a crazy meat-in-the-woods Proud Boy and an Antifa fat bitch in us. And we have to make sure that the fusion of those two things is what makes us great. You know? We all have those two things. All of us get mad at corporations and wanna burn them down, but we don't go into the Portland Center and throw eggs at a Starbucks 'cause we're sane. And then all of us get mad when, like, I don't know, like, somebody... Whatever. Like, i- at a fast food place someone of a different race doesn't get our order right. We all get mad, but we don't go into the woods with a burning cross because we have things to do.

   24. JRJoe Rogan47:44

       (laughs)

   25. TDTim Dillon47:46

       So, what we have to realize is that we're Americans, you know? We're deeply selfish monsters that have been bred to destroy all life on Earth. We can't... We have to not lose sight of that message. We're here to fuck things up for everyone else, not each other. And that's what we had in the '80s and the '90s. We had a commitment to apathy while our leaders ran around pillaging the Earth, and we made great movies and great art and it was fine. Yes, people got killed, but people always get killed. But now we're- we're at war with each other. We're- We- We should just be enjoying the spoils of the end of the empire, truly.

   26. JRJoe Rogan48:22

       (laughs)

   27. TDTim Dillon48:23

       We should be enjoying it. People- So many people got killed, murdered, tortured, maimed for us to have all the nice things we have. Do you know how insane it is to not enjoy it? You know how crazy it is to not enjoy a McMansion, a flat screen TV, a McFlurry? You know how big- how much blood is in the street for those things? And people act like they don't even matter and they're fighting about all this bullshit. It's crazy. Anyway, that's the truth. That's the real truth. Nobody wants to hear it, but that is the truth. We have... A lot of these things are nice, but some of them are ill-gotten gains. Fine. You know? Not everybody picking tomatoes is happy about it. But have you ever had a good, like, a nice Jersey thick beefsteak tomato? It's good. Imagine having one and then fighting with someone about something. It's stupid. If there's a hell in the world going, and if there's not, we get reincarnated when we're, uh, beetles or something. But just enjoy it. And nobody wants to enjoy it, and that's what makes me upset, is that we used to have a- a country built on enjoyment, built on fat, stupid people enjoying the work of a small group of demons, and now we can't even enjoy it.

   28. JRJoe Rogan49:25

       (laughs)

   29. TDTim Dillon49:25

       Can't even have fun.

   30. JRJoe Rogan49:26

       (laughs) Do you know what I think unites us?
5. 1:00:00 – 1:10:57

   It, to me, it's-…

   1. JRJoe Rogan1:00:00

   2. TDTim Dillon1:00:00

      It, to me, it's-

   3. JRJoe Rogan1:00:00

      Can I see it again?

   4. TDTim Dillon1:00:01

      (clears throat)

   5. JRJoe Rogan1:00:02

      From the very beginning. You don't see it at all.

   6. TDTim Dillon1:00:05

      It's weird that that's the only video of this thing.

   7. JRJoe Rogan1:00:08

      Is this...

   8. JVJamie Vernon1:00:09

      That's the only frame you can see something else before the airplane.

   9. TDTim Dillon1:00:11

      9/11, there's a million different planes.

   10. JRJoe Rogan1:00:12

       That looks like a plane.

   11. TDTim Dillon1:00:14

       It, it's, it, you, but you can't tell what kind of plane, you don't know how big it is. You don't, you, all you see is white.

   12. JRJoe Rogan1:00:20

       Let me see that again.

   13. TDTim Dillon1:00:23

       Unless there's-

   14. JRJoe Rogan1:00:23

       That looks like a fucking plane to me.

   15. TDTim Dillon1:00:24

       They analyze this actually brilliantly in a documentary called 9/11: The New Pearl Harbor, and they actually talk about this exact video that was released and the frame rate and everything like that. But it is impossible to know if that thing that you're seeing-

   16. JRJoe Rogan1:00:37

       But look how big it is. It looks like a plane.

   17. TDTim Dillon1:00:38

       It, it, it, all you're seeing is a, a streak of white.

   18. JRJoe Rogan1:00:41

       Right.

   19. JVJamie Vernon1:00:42

       That's all you can see.

   20. JRJoe Rogan1:00:43

       But look, but look at that right there. Tell me that doesn't look like a plane.

   21. TDTim Dillon1:00:45

       I have no idea what the hell that is.

   22. JRJoe Rogan1:00:46

       But doesn't it look like a plane?

   23. TDTim Dillon1:00:48

       I have no idea what-

   24. JRJoe Rogan1:00:49

       Okay-

   25. TDTim Dillon1:00:49

       ... kind of plane-

   26. JRJoe Rogan1:00:49

       If I-

   27. TDTim Dillon1:00:49

       ... how big it is.

   28. JRJoe Rogan1:00:50

       If I, if I said to you, "Do you think that that is a house?"

   29. TDTim Dillon1:00:55

       I wouldn't say it's a house.

   30. JRJoe Rogan1:00:56

       It's not a flying house.

Episode duration: 3:09:53