Joe Rogan Experience #1874 - Dave Attell

Dave Attell 0:00 (drumming music) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out. The Joe Rogan Experience.

Joe Rogan 0:06 Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. (rock music) Ladies and gentlemen, David Attell.

Dave Attell 0:17 Hey, Joe. Thanks for having me on the show.

Joe Rogan 0:19 Good to see you, my brother.

Dave Attell 0:20 I was telling your guys before you showed up, I was like, "Uh, I'm hoping there's other guests besides me 'cause I don't really think I'm interesting enough to hold the whole show."

Joe Rogan 0:28 We can do it.

Dave Attell 0:29 You think so?

Joe Rogan 0:29 Yes. All right, I believe in you.

Dave Attell 0:31 I have, I have zero worries.

Joe Rogan 0:33 (laughs)

Dave Attell 0:33 I'm glad you brought your straw.

Joe Rogan 0:34 Thank you.

Dave Attell 0:35 And I'm also- (laughs)

Joe Rogan 0:37 (laughs) I'm also glad you brought your hobo sack. (laughs)

Dave Attell 0:38 I'll show everybody.

Joe Rogan 0:40 He's a comedy nomad.

Dave Attell 0:41 That's how you travel, people. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 0:41 That's all he brings, fresh underwear and socks. That's it. Let's go.

Dave Attell 0:46 Good to be back in Texas.

Joe Rogan 0:47 Good to see you. How was the Cap City? Did you enjoy it?

Dave Attell 0:49 It was awesome. I mean, you and I back in the day played the old Cap City.

Joe Rogan 0:53 Yeah.

Dave Attell 0:53 And, uh, that was definitely an iconic club. And this is the, uh, I guess you can say the, um, the reimagining of it.

Joe Rogan 1:00 This is, uh, the, the helium folks who do an amazing job.

Dave Attell 1:03 Exactly.

Joe Rogan 1:03 Helium folks are great. They-

Dave Attell 1:04 They really are.

Joe Rogan 1:05 That fucking place in Philly is the shit. The one in Portland is the shit. The other clubs are fucking locked down. They're all solid as a rock.

Dave Attell 1:12 I totally agree with you. And they put a lot of work into it.

Joe Rogan 1:15 Mm-hmm.

Dave Attell 1:15 And, uh, let's face it, this town, you know, uh, people will come to a show. They really are great comedy fans, so...

Joe Rogan 1:22 Uh, and I'm, like, so happy that, uh, that Cap City's open too. I want as many clubs open as possible. I think it's sustainable. I think there's a giant comedy audience here. People really love it. They love live performance overall. Like, there's a lot of live music that goes on here, a lot of live comedy.

Dave Attell 1:38 And, uh-

Joe Rogan 1:39 So we're happy.

Dave Attell 1:40 Texas, I was gonna say, like, Texas has always been, like, um, you know, on the road, like Houston, Dallas, uh-

Joe Rogan 1:46 Yeah, fun.

Dave Attell 1:46 ... you know, uh, San Antonio. These were always, like, the hardcore, you know, um, comedy clubs. The, uh, definitely where you, like, couldn't wait to get there kind of shows.

Joe Rogan 1:55 Yeah, the fun spots.

Dave Attell 1:56 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 1:56 I used to love Addison. That fucking improv was the shit.

Dave Attell 1:59 Awesome.

Joe Rogan 1:59 It still is. Still is the shit.

Dave Attell 2:01 And my favorite-

Joe Rogan 2:02 Such a great club.

Dave Attell 2:02 Do you remember, uh, c- um, the com-, uh, what was it called? Uh, in Houston, uh-

Joe Rogan 2:06 Laugh Stop.

Dave Attell 2:07 The Laugh Stop. That's-

Joe Rogan 2:07 That was the best.

Dave Attell 2:08 That's where I learned to be a headliner. That's what I always think.

Joe Rogan 2:10 Yes.

Dave Attell 2:10 That was the club where I really got it together and I was like, "I can hold an hour," you know, right here.

Joe Rogan 2:15 Yes.

Dave Attell 2:15 You know?

Joe Rogan 2:16 I did my first CD there.

Dave Attell 2:18 Oh, you did?

Joe Rogan 2:18 Yes.

Dave Attell 2:19 Well, there you go, man.

Joe Rogan 2:20 Yeah, that place is magic. That place was magic. I, I heard that, that, that spot is still there, which I was like, "Jesus Christ." If that's the case, once we open up in Austin, I would love to open up a mothership in, in Houston.

Dave Attell 2:32 Oh, absolutely, man.

Joe Rogan 2:33 If that place is still there, holy shit, that place is amazing.

Dave Attell 2:37 Yeah, it's always been like, uh, you know, what... Uh, I remember it was like me, Hedberg, and, uh, Patrice. Like-

Joe Rogan 2:44 Mm-hmm.

Dave Attell 2:44 ... we would all, like, rotate through there.

Joe Rogan 2:45 Yeah.

Dave Attell 2:45 And it was always like, if you ran into him, like, "Oh man, I was just, uh-"

Joe Rogan 2:48 Yep.

Dave Attell 2:48 "... at the stop." It was like, "Oh, it must have been awesome." And you know, you'd be jealous, you know.

Joe Rogan 2:52 Crazy ass Mark Babit ran a hell of a club.

Dave Attell 2:54 He really did.

Joe Rogan 2:55 He really did.

Dave Attell 2:55 Visionary.

Joe Rogan 2:56 Oh my God, he loved comedy. That's all it takes. Takes a crazy person that loves comedy who's willing to, like, go all out.

Dave Attell 3:02 When the, uh, owner of the club, you know, or the manager gets it, you know?

Joe Rogan 3:06 Yes.

Dave Attell 3:06 And then I- it's not just like a beer and beverage, you know?

Joe Rogan 3:08 Right.

Dave Attell 3:08 This isn't a Dave & Buster's. This is, like, a real place, like, where people do something special.

Joe Rogan 3:12 Yeah.

Dave Attell 3:13 Then you can always tell. It feels, it feels different, you know?

Joe Rogan 3:15 And he also had that long running open mic they'd do in the front.

Dave Attell 3:19 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 3:19 You know, that front open mic was amazing. You would get there at eight o'clock and the show would start, and then they'd start a open mic around the same time, and the open mic would go to fucking two o'clock in the morning.

Dave Attell 3:29 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 3:30 Constantly rotating comics in there. It was like, it was an exciting thing.

Dave Attell 3:33 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 3:33 And when that place went under, it fucking, you know, it took a lot of the steam out of the scene.

Dave Attell 3:39 For sure. That's why your club... And you're real close now.

Joe Rogan 3:42 Real close, yeah.

Dave Attell 3:43 Like, that's gonna... Honestly, that's a game changer, especially for this town and for, uh, you know, for all of us road people. You know, I'm a club guy. That's what I do.

Joe Rogan 3:51 Yeah.

Dave Attell 3:51 I do clubs. So I can't wait to see it. I can't wait to get on that stage, if I may.

Joe Rogan 3:55 You 100% will be one of the first people on that stage.

Dave Attell 3:59 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 3:59 I'm gonna put up the bat signal.

Dave Attell 4:00 Oh, that would be awesome.

Joe Rogan 4:01 I'll send you in. Uh, I, it's, uh, it's exciting to be able to do. It's exciting to be able to do it with no stress too, to be able to do it the right way.

Dave Attell 4:08 Right.

Joe Rogan 4:09 And just have an, an amazing club set up for comics in the audience. And just make it, make it so that, like, we do our best at, in every corner.

Dave Attell 4:17 Uh-huh.

Joe Rogan 4:17 Not fuck with people, appreciate 'em, treat 'em with respect... Uh-oh, the mic's falling apart.

Dave Attell 4:22 I'm good.

Joe Rogan 4:22 Appreciate 'em, treat 'em with respect. Like, encourage people to, to work and give open mic nights and have-

Dave Attell 4:29 Yes.

Joe Rogan 4:29 Yeah. Have things like that where you have plenty of, plenty of time, and Kill Tony and that kind of shit. You know, where you really encourage the community.

Dave Attell 4:37 Definitely. You gotta, um... You know, when the club also supports the locals, it's not just, like, for the headliners.

Joe Rogan 4:43 Yeah.

Dave Attell 4:43 That's when you know it's like a real deal situation because, uh, you know, these local scenes... Like, I was just in Nashville. That, that scene is popping. Here, of course, it's outta control. And, uh, you know, it's getting the locals, you know, on stage in front of a big crowd, you know?

Joe Rogan 4:57 Yeah.

Dave Attell 4:57 That's important.

Joe Rogan 4:58 Getting them on stage in front of... Giving them those spots, like the Kill Tony spots. And I've had a few of those guys, like Hans Kim and William Montgomery and David Lucas who, you know, started in LA but he's out here now too-

Dave Attell 5:08 Right.

Joe Rogan 5:08 ... doing those shows with, with us there too. They're, they're exploding.

Dave Attell 5:12 Well-

Joe Rogan 5:12 And there's also a lot of room for other clubs too. There's a lot of room. There's so many comics here, man. Everybody who goes to these open mics out here, these guys who come, they go, "Dude, these kids are good." They're good in their writing and they're energized. It's like, it's an exciting time. And people are, like, really fired up about... And you see, like, a real clear path to being a professional, which was always weird for us.

Dave Attell 5:32 Right.

Joe Rogan 5:32 Like, you remember the early days of open mic? There was no help.

Dave Attell 5:35 None.

Joe Rogan 5:35 It was-

Dave Attell 5:36 I mean-

Joe Rogan 5:36 ... strange.

Dave Attell 5:37 I don't know about you, like, your, your, uh, you know, I guess origin story. But like, I had a job for like the first five or six years of comedy and, like, I was such a bad comic that, like, I would sometimes go like, "Oh God, I can't wait to get back to my day job." (laughs)

Joe Rogan 5:53 (laughs)

Dave Attell 5:53 "Oh man, I can't wait to eat a muffin at my desk." You know, it was like that kind of a thing.

Joe Rogan 5:57 Ah (laughs) .

Dave Attell 5:57 So yeah, I know what these, these people go through and even though there's, like, all these platforming and all that stuff, it'll always be the same, like, you know, basically, uh, you know, whatever. I guess you could say the journey, the, uh, the...... has many roads, many twists and turns, so, you know.

Joe Rogan 6:12 The journey does, but at least, uh, uh, this way, I think, there's a map of the landscape now.

Dave Attell 6:17 For sure.

Joe Rogan 6:18 Whereas when we started, it was just you, you were hoping that someone would take you on the road, or you were hoping that you'd get a road gig. You didn't know, like, how to... And you're doing, like, five, 10-minute spots in the beginning.

Dave Attell 6:29 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 6:29 If you're lucky, you get 10 minutes, right?

Dave Attell 6:31 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 6:31 So then someone says, "Can you do 20?" And you're like, "Yes." But you really can't, you know?

Dave Attell 6:34 Right, of course.

Joe Rogan 6:35 It's like... (laughs)

Dave Attell 6:36 Yeah. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 6:36 So it's like you're opening in a bar with, you know, at least 10 bullshit minutes.

Dave Attell 6:40 And when you're in a town like I, you know, started in New York, Long Island and all that stuff, there was, there was a lot of open mics.

Joe Rogan 6:45 Yes.

Dave Attell 6:45 So I was lucky where you can go to one place, you know, like, bomb, and then skid mark your way over to the next one-

Joe Rogan 6:51 Yeah.

Dave Attell 6:51 ... and, you know, like, suffer there, and then the next one. So you got, like, a whole, like, night of sadness, whereas some kids, it's like, you know, especially, uh, West Coast, l- it's like, "Oh, I got a spot, you know, one a week," and then they gotta live with that, that kind of, like, trauma for a whole week.

Joe Rogan 7:05 It's better there now. It's better there now-

Dave Attell 7:06 Oh, it is?

Joe Rogan 7:06 ... for the LA guys. The... You can actually develop in LA now. Um, but i- in the early 2000s and the '90s, it was real hard.

Dave Attell 7:13 For sure.

Joe Rogan 7:13 You couldn't get spots. Everybody was getting spots, so TV stars and actors and stuff were getting spots.

Dave Attell 7:19 Yeah, it's, uh, it's-

Joe Rogan 7:20 What year did you start?

Dave Attell 7:21 Uh, in the late '80s, at the end of the comedy boom. Uh-

Joe Rogan 7:24 Then me too. I started in '88.

Dave Attell 7:26 Yeah, I was, like, '87, and I remember, like, comedy had just died 'cause I worked the, uh, door at the old Improv in New York, that was, like, one of the original comedy clubs, and honestly, it was weird to be a doorman to no audience. You know, you basically hold the door open. There's a guy out there, "Oh, no, he's just..."

Joe Rogan 7:43 Was it a difference? Was there a big drop-off in New York?

Dave Attell 7:46 I, I think that, I think that the comedy boom, like, what you saw, like, in Boston, you know, like, where every place was doing comedy shows-

Joe Rogan 7:52 Yeah.

Dave Attell 7:52 ... and there were so many great locals, you know, just, like, hardcore killer acts that, like, um... New York, that kinda didn't really... It, it dissipated, and then it kinda faded out, and a lot of these clubs kind of went down, and then, um, you know, we were just basically hanging on, you know, just learning to do comedy, you know. So it was like we didn't care, you know. If it was a, a big room, we still woulda, we still woulda suffered, but still, like, the fact that there was, like, only 12 people in there, it almost kinda fit where we were-

Joe Rogan 8:20 Right.

Dave Attell 8:20 ... in comedy, you know?

Joe Rogan 8:21 I remember those days at r- at Dangerfield's. Did you do Dangerfield's?

Dave Attell 8:25 Yes, yes, I did.

Joe Rogan 8:25 Those were the best-

Dave Attell 8:26 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 8:26 ... those shows where there was no one in the audience. (laughs)

Dave Attell 8:28 I used to call that, that club the Humbler. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 8:32 (laughs) Do you remember Bobby?

Dave Attell 8:33 If you thought you were doing all right, you go in there, and they take you right back to reality. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 8:36 Do you remember Bobby, the big Scottish-

Dave Attell 8:38 Uh...

Joe Rogan 8:38 ... guy that worked the door?

Dave Attell 8:39 Yes, I do. Yeah, I do.

Joe Rogan 8:41 I saw Bobby pick a man up by his neck.

Dave Attell 8:43 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 8:44 Bobby would make his own weights. He would, uh, he would fill up, like, uh, these, these, like, 10-gallon jugs with cement and would make his own weights.

Dave Attell 8:52 Oh, cool.

Joe Rogan 8:53 Yeah, he did a lot of wild shit. Like, Bobby was like this, like, tank of a man. It was hilarious.

Dave Attell 8:58 It was, it was a small club with a lot of big people in it.

Joe Rogan 9:00 Oh, my God, it was a-

Dave Attell 9:01 It was tiny. It was like an elevator, basically, but-

Joe Rogan 9:03 It was an amazing place.

Dave Attell 9:04 And then they had that big piano in there, and I was like-

Joe Rogan 9:06 Yeah.

Dave Attell 9:07 ... "Where am I supposed to... I don't play the piano."

Joe Rogan 9:09 (laughs)

Dave Attell 9:09 "What am I supposed to do?" You know?

Joe Rogan 9:11 You had to have a piano if you had class back then.

Dave Attell 9:12 Sure, just in case. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 9:14 Class, this is a fucking real club. The Improv used to have that problem. I'm like, "Why do we have a piano up here?"

Dave Attell 9:19 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 9:20 I would always say that to Rita. I'm like, "Rita, look at me. Why... No one's playing a fucking piano." Cr- Craig can bring his own piano. He brings a c- a piano sometimes.

Dave Attell 9:27 When I l-

Joe Rogan 9:28 When Robinson wants to go up.

Dave Attell 9:29 What I always like, uh, with the Improv piano, it's like you can tell who was raised right. Who puts their drink on the piano?

Joe Rogan 9:36 (laughs)

Dave Attell 9:36 Like, "Uh-oh, you're gonna leave a ring."

Joe Rogan 9:39 But it's probably expensive. It's probably an expensive piano.

Dave Attell 9:41 Yeah, I don't know who uses it, but they got it there, and, uh, yeah, I liked that club too, the Melrose Improv.

Joe Rogan 9:46 Good club.

Dave Attell 9:46 I always felt really at home there.

Joe Rogan 9:47 It's a great club.

Dave Attell 9:48 You know?

Joe Rogan 9:48 That p- that club's great. That was my spot after I left the Store in 2007. I was at the Improv all the time. It was great, that and the Icehouse. Uh, it was-

Dave Attell 9:56 The Icehouse, I only played a couple times.

Joe Rogan 9:57 Oh, my God, it's magic. That room's magic. The Icehouse, one of the most underrated clubs in the country. That's such a good room. The, the, the big room, when it's packed, oh, my God. That, that room's amazing.

Dave Attell 10:09 Do you, uh, like, you know, you got a family and everything, do you still like having the time to go out every night and, like, you know, work on, work on an act? Like-

Joe Rogan 10:16 Well, my kids are young, so they go to bed right around-

Dave Attell 10:18 Uh-huh.

Joe Rogan 10:18 ... the time I'm leaving.

Dave Attell 10:19 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 10:20 Which is nice. So, uh, I'll, like, I'm leaving, like, an hour before they go to bed.

Dave Attell 10:24 Okay.

Joe Rogan 10:25 So it's... There's a benefit in that, and that was a st- at the Store, it was even better 'cause at the Store, most of my spots were after 10:00, so I was leaving, like, they were well asleep-

Dave Attell 10:34 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 10:34 ... by I'm leaving the house. And it's, it's like I could come home too and write when no one's awake, which-

Dave Attell 10:40 Oh, that's good.

Joe Rogan 10:40 ... for me is come home, spark up a little-

Dave Attell 10:44 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 10:44 ... sit in front of the computer, and just sit there, and just think when-

Dave Attell 10:47 Wow.

Joe Rogan 10:47 ... everyone's asleep and the world's quiet. Like, that's my favorite time to write.

Dave Attell 10:52 You know, during the, uh, you know, when everything was shut down, you know?

Joe Rogan 10:55 Yeah.

Dave Attell 10:55 Like, the scariest thing was, like, I miss being on the road, you know?

Joe Rogan 10:59 Mm-hmm.

Dave Attell 10:59 I miss being out there, like, you know, headlining and all that stuff too, but what I really miss was, like, going to the Comedy Cellar in New York and going on and doing a spot, and whatever version of comedy they had, the outside, the behind the plexiglass, of course I did it. But then there were times when everything was shut, and I was like, "Uh-oh-"

Joe Rogan 11:14 Yeah.

Dave Attell 11:14 "... I'm starting to get used to not going out," and I got really scared. It was like one of those, like-

Joe Rogan 11:19 Yeah.

Dave Attell 11:19 ... where you're like, you know, "Maybe I don't need to go out anymore." You know?

Joe Rogan 11:22 I was gonna do that-

Dave Attell 11:22 "I've been doing this a long time, I'm an old guy," you know?

Joe Rogan 11:25 Ron White went through that.

Dave Attell 11:26 Did he?

Joe Rogan 11:26 Yeah.

Dave Attell 11:27 Okay.

Joe Rogan 11:27 So...

Dave Attell 11:27 I love Ron.

Joe Rogan 11:28 Ron was out here, and we hadn't done shows together in, it, it was like at least a year for me. It was a- it was around... So it was around eight months of no comedy at all in LA, and we had just started doing these outdoor shows with Chappelle, so I knew I had to freshen up, so I started doing shows at the Vulcan. And Ron was gonna do, uh, Tony's show at the Vulcan, and he's like, "Well, I, I think I'm retired. I think I'm gonna take my boat, and I'm gonna fucking play golf, and fuck it, I made a lot of money, and I'm fine. I'm, I'm fine with retiring." So, uh, Tony goes, "Well, just do, like, one show."You just- if you want to, you can go do a set. No pressure. He's like, "All right, man. Maybe I'll fucking think about it, but I think I'm fucking retired." And the next day, he's like, uh, "So did you think about it?" He goes, "Yeah, I'm prepared. Uh, let's go. I'm, I'm gonna do a set." So he goes up and fucking murders. So Tony talks to his girlfriend, and Ron had gone over his iPad, he was fucking going over notes and listening to old recordings, taking notes, and like, he went up there guns blazing.

Dave Attell 12:36 Oh.

Joe Rogan 12:36 And Ron White crushed. And then he gets off stage and he grabs me by my shoulders, he goes, "Whatever the fuck we have to do, we're gonna keep doing this."

Dave Attell 12:43 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 12:44 He goes, "Whatever the fuck we have to do. Get your fucking club open. Let's go, Joe Rogan." I'm like, "Goddamn Ron White."

Dave Attell 12:51 I love Ron, man. You know, he's like one of the few guys I know who is successful and really enjoys it.

Joe Rogan 12:57 Oh, he loves it.

Dave Attell 12:58 He loves it.

Joe Rogan 12:58 He loves it.

Dave Attell 12:58 He's great, like j-

Joe Rogan 12:59 He's always writing too, man. He's always working on new shit. He comes down, we do those Tuesday and Wednesday shows at Vulcan, he's always coming down and working on new shit.

Dave Attell 13:07 Yeah, he doesn't have to do any of that.

Joe Rogan 13:07 He's done this new bit that murders.

Dave Attell 13:09 I'm sorry, he doesn't have to do any of that stuff. It's just, he loves the game, you know?

Joe Rogan 13:12 Well, you don't have to do it either, but you do it. It's the same thing, man. It's like these guys who just love what we- they love the s- the thing, the standup, the fucking thing, when you're set up, punchline, boom, you wrote it, now you're making it better, it's killing, it's like this is my new chunk, like woo, it's exciting.

Dave Attell 13:28 I don't know if you've seen me lately.

Joe Rogan 13:29 (laughs)

Dave Attell 13:29 I, uh, that's very kind of you. Yeah, no, I would say that I'm in that moment now where it's like my crowd is so good, like, uh, the people who have been, like, coming to see me for years now, like, they are so good all the different ways you want them. Like, they love jokes. There's no line for them, you know?

Joe Rogan 13:45 Right.

Dave Attell 13:46 They don't want it, they don't want it dumbed down, they don't want it ne- They know I don't pick sides. And they know that it's, it's about the joke, and that I'm trying to bring them new material every time. And they drink and they tip hard and they're good to the staff, so what more can I ask for, you know?

Joe Rogan 13:58 That's the best.

Dave Attell 13:59 I'm a lucky guy. I'm very lucky.

Joe Rogan 14:00 The best.

Dave Attell 14:00 And anybody who works with me, they always say the same thing, they go, "Dave, your crowd is awesome." So ...

Joe Rogan 14:04 That's beautiful.

Dave Attell 14:05 You know, it's a great compliment.

Joe Rogan 14:06 Well, it's because you're doing all the right things. You're doing comedy just for comedy, you know? You're just having fun. And some of us d- that fell apart-

Dave Attell 14:14 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 14:14 Some of us fell apart in this wonderful world of, like, what's okay to talk about, what's not okay to talk about, what's a joke and what's not acceptable. It's like, come on.

Dave Attell 14:24 It- it seems like you and I have both done the West, you know, West, East Coast kind of like, uh-

Joe Rogan 14:29 Yeah.

Dave Attell 14:29 You, you do your r- your show on the road, and you're like, "There is no wrong." And then you hit, like, a, a showcase show, like New York or whatever. And I'm, I'm old. I mean, I'm 57 years old.

Joe Rogan 14:39 Yeah.

Dave Attell 14:39 And I am so- I never try and be relevant, but irrelevant is the word. Like, they kind of go up there and it looks like I'm about to lead, like, a, a, a ghost hunting tour, you know?

Joe Rogan 14:49 (laughs)

Dave Attell 14:49 They're like terrified. But like, the moans and the groans and all that kinda stuff, I'm kinda getting used to it, you know, the choppy sea as I call it, you know?

Joe Rogan 14:56 Yeah.

Dave Attell 14:56 The, the little like whimpers and like, you know, cries of foul play. I mean, it's like, okay, that's, that's how you guys react? I gotta just deal with that. But it's nothing like them back in the day when you knew immediately when you were, uh ... (laughs) I mean, there's no, there's not a plate of chicken wings coming at you, you know?

Joe Rogan 15:13 Right.

Dave Attell 15:13 It's like, I mean, you know, like let's take it for what it is.

Joe Rogan 15:15 For us-

Dave Attell 15:15 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 15:15 ... for r- d- people who have done, uh, those prom shows at Dangerfield's.

Dave Attell 15:19 Yeah. Well, that's the thing. It's like, you know, the, the reaction, the reaction is, is different, you know? But I would say the, and this probably scares you too, is the cold silence of a young crowd. (laughs) You know?

Joe Rogan 15:29 Yeah.

Dave Attell 15:29 Where they just basically, you can see it in their head, they're buffering. They're trying to figure out what to, how to react.

Joe Rogan 15:34 It's interesting because like, there's a way to navigate those waters, right? But these are definitely new waters. And if you are, uh, if you wanna bring up controversial material, there's certain people that aren't even gonna listen to what you're saying. They, they won't listen to what you're saying. What they wanna do is just immediately react to a subject and bark.

Dave Attell 15:52 Right.

Joe Rogan 15:52 They immediately wanna like state their position on the subject and bark. So you, 'cause you've, you've hit like political or cultural hot points.

Dave Attell 15:59 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 16:00 And you can't even have a, a take on them that's humorous. They, they won't allow that because they feel like they're an activist.

Dave Attell 16:05 I, I-

Joe Rogan 16:05 That's the problem.

Dave Attell 16:06 I, I, I know what you're talking about. And like I, I'm always like, you know, it's the joke. And like I really, you know, put a lot of time into material, so like, uh, anybody who knows me is like, I check a joke. I wanna make sure that like, um, I'm doing it, you know, it's my joke.

Joe Rogan 16:20 You've called me several times.

Dave Attell 16:21 Yeah, I have, right.

Joe Rogan 16:22 Several times saying-

Dave Attell 16:23 That's a weird call, isn't it?

Joe Rogan 16:24 No, it's a good call. It's a good call because it's a call from an artist, you know? You're like, "Hey, this seemed like it came to me too easy. Have you heard this?"

Dave Attell 16:30 But uh, but that, but my friends, uh, you know, I include you in this group, always go like, you know, your calls are almost cryptic. Like ...

Joe Rogan 16:38 (laughs)

Dave Attell 16:38 Do you say-

Joe Rogan 16:38 I take those calls.

Dave Attell 16:39 (laughs) Do you say antelope in a, in a joke?

Joe Rogan 16:42 (laughs)

Dave Attell 16:42 Do you have a joke that ends with Froot Loops? I'm like, uh, you know, what- who is this? You know, that kind of thing.

Joe Rogan 16:48 It's so funny because Santino called me up the other day in a frenzy. He's like, "I- do you have a joke on this? I feel like you have a joke on this. I had a nightmare that you had a joke on this in one of your old specials." I go, "Nope, definitely don't."

Dave Attell 16:57 Right.

Joe Rogan 16:57 I definitely don't. If I do, I forgot it, so ... (laughs)

Dave Attell 17:00 And then, and it-

Joe Rogan 17:00 It's fair play.

Dave Attell 17:01 Luckily there's all these super fans now where like-

Joe Rogan 17:03 Yeah.

Dave Attell 17:03 They start quoting-

Joe Rogan 17:04 They'll find you.

Dave Attell 17:04 ... your old material after.

Joe Rogan 17:05 Yeah.

Dave Attell 17:05 I'm like, "Who is that guy? Oh, that's me."

Joe Rogan 17:07 Yeah.

Dave Attell 17:07 Oh, I forgot. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 17:09 I know what someone will bring up a joke and I don't even know how it goes.

Dave Attell 17:12 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 17:12 'Cause I, I have to abandon them. We all have to aba- do you smoke cigars?

Dave Attell 17:16 Uh, no, that was my dad's thing.

Joe Rogan 17:18 No?

Dave Attell 17:18 I'm, I'm on these, uh, these American Spirits.

Joe Rogan 17:21 Those are good. Those are healthy.

Dave Attell 17:23 Uh, are they? (laughs)

Joe Rogan 17:25 I don't think so.

Dave Attell 17:26 Mm-mm. But uh, yeah, no, you've been, uh, you've been cool with that because I know when people get the call sometimes they get all like, "Why, why are you asking me this?" And I'm like, "I'm just trying to check the joke."

Joe Rogan 17:38 No man, everybody does that. If you don't do that, then maybe you've never had an idea that came to you that's weird. Like sometimes an idea will come to you, it's like, "Is that ... No one's thought that already?"

Dave Attell 17:47 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 17:48 How have no one thought that one?

Dave Attell 17:49 Too easy.

Joe Rogan 17:49 Sometimes they're too easy.

Dave Attell 17:49 A too easy joke. Yeah.

Joe Rogan 17:51 And you don't know, man, because like there's shit that you might have heard when you had been doing comedy for six months and you completely forgot about it. And then all of a sudden it pops in your head as if it's yours. And you're like, "Oh shit."

Dave Attell 18:02 And then you also have to, 'cause there's so many different ways to stream and-

Joe Rogan 18:06 Yeah.

Dave Attell 18:06 ... platform that now it's like, oh, you know, is this a joke, you know? Like, is this one cool or did someone already TikTok this idea? Or that, you know, like what's going on? Is somebody meming the, uh ... Sorry, I don't even know the terms. So ...... that's the point of, like, ugh, it's harder and harder to check material all the time.

Joe Rogan 18:24 Yeah. But (sighs) it's kinda fun.

Dave Attell 18:27 (exhales) Yeah, well, I-

Joe Rogan 18:27 It's part of the fun of it all. It is a fun way to make a living, goddammit.

Dave Attell 18:30 For sure. And I, I always, um, you know, since I have very few, um, marketable skills, you know, it's cool to have one where you have some control over your, you know, destiny, situation, and all that kinda stuff.

Joe Rogan 18:42 You've managed to avoid all the pitfalls of social media.

Dave Attell 18:46 No, I'm, I'm not into it.

Joe Rogan 18:47 Yeah.

Dave Attell 18:47 I, I, I kinda rock with a flip phone. I got someone who does that for me, and I'm, uh, you know, I answer every message I can. And, you know, I just don't, I don't, uh, I mean, I give you a lot of credit for what you do. Doing this every day for hours on end, that's tough, that's really tough, and it's hard to get up for that show.

Joe Rogan 19:05 Dude, it's easy.

Dave Attell 19:05 The fans would. It is?

Joe Rogan 19:06 Coal mining's tough. Yeah.

Dave Attell 19:07 Well, that's true.

Joe Rogan 19:08 This is easy as fuck. I'm talking to people like you.

Dave Attell 19:09 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 19:10 How hard is that? I'm the luckiest guy alive. I get to talk to some of the coolest fucks that have ever lived.

Dave Attell 19:14 Well, I don't know.

Joe Rogan 19:14 It's amazing. It's so fun.

Dave Attell 19:16 You gotta give a lot of yourself for that. I'm not really like a, um, a, you know, like... I, I have trouble talking about myself. And I like talking about comedy, and like, uh, you know, we were talking about this outside in the hall about, like, uh, there's a lot of dead, uh, friends of ours, you know, out there and stuff like that. And, you know, if I could bring one up, would be cool. Uh, Gilbert, you know?

Joe Rogan 19:36 Yeah.

Dave Attell 19:36 Who I was there when he went down, you know. Uh, Jeff Ross and I were both really close friends with the family and Gilbert, and, uh, we had both been there, like, day of. And, uh, I was there in the morning when he went down, and I was thinking, like, you know, here's a guy who generationally, like, for, since the '80s, you know?

Joe Rogan 19:52 Yeah.

Dave Attell 19:53 Has been famous, infamous, famous, all that kinda stuff. And we all knew him in the comedy world, like what he was about, or at least I did.

Joe Rogan 20:00 Yeah.

Dave Attell 20:00 You know, I was always a huge fan of his. He always made me laugh, always made me laugh. And it's great when you get a guy that you know and he makes you laugh. And, uh, I was like, you know... Social media for him was easy. Like, he loved it. He loved Cameo.

Joe Rogan 20:13 Yeah. (laughs)

Dave Attell 20:13 He was, like, the biggest Cameo guy in the world. Like, he's-

Joe Rogan 20:16 Yeah. Happy birthday.

Dave Attell 20:17 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 20:18 (laughs)

Dave Attell 20:18 You cocksucker. I hope your anniversary... You know, like-

Joe Rogan 20:22 Yeah.

Dave Attell 20:22 ... just these, these, like a, like a troll-

Joe Rogan 20:24 Yeah, yeah.

Dave Attell 20:25 ... sending out, you know, like, riddles.

Joe Rogan 20:27 Yeah.

Dave Attell 20:27 But, but like, he loved it, he loved it. And it's like, it's amazing how, like, you know, here's a guy, he's older than me, but he somehow took to it, and it worked for him, you know?

Joe Rogan 20:35 It just naturally fit his personality.

Dave Attell 20:37 For sure.

Joe Rogan 20:37 He was a funny fucking dude, man.

Dave Attell 20:39 He-

Joe Rogan 20:39 I was so happy to get him in here and get a chance to talk to him, and, you know. 'Cause I never really had that much time talking to him. It was just like saying hi at a club here or there. But to sit down... That's the thing about, like, a podcast that's different than any other kinda conversation, you get to really know someone over hours and hours of time just shooting the shit about stuff.

Dave Attell 20:58 True.

Joe Rogan 20:59 It's like, how often do we get a chance to do... Like, some of the best conversations I've ever had with my friends have been public.

Dave Attell 21:05 Everything has... Ev- we're all different places, different times.

Joe Rogan 21:08 Yeah.

Dave Attell 21:08 All that kinda stuff. But with Gilbert, I was gonna say that, you know, here's a guy who, like, when I would go, "Hey, you're in town. Come down to the Comedy Cellar and do a set, or I'll bring you on stage and we'll, like, do, like, a little something." You know?

Joe Rogan 21:21 Yeah.

Dave Attell 21:21 And like, uh, you know, Jeff and I always loved, like, working with him, you know? He's always so much fun. But like, he, he was like, "No, why would I do that?"

Joe Rogan 21:29 (laughs)

Dave Attell 21:29 "I was just in Poughkeepsie, New York. I don't need to," you know, "I don't need to get... Go up in front of stra-" You know, like, he was like, you know, "The job was the job."

Joe Rogan 21:38 Yeah.

Dave Attell 21:38 And then, you know, he did his other thing. So, I, I kinda respected that about him too, you know?

Joe Rogan 21:43 But he also did Cameo.

Dave Attell 21:44 He, no, he loved Cameo.

Joe Rogan 21:45 So he's a Cameo man.

Dave Attell 21:46 (laughs) He really was.

Joe Rogan 21:48 (laughs)

Dave Attell 21:48 I'm sure the flag was at half-staff at Cameo when he went down.

Joe Rogan 21:51 I bet. Yeah. Cameos are odd. I go to watch people's Cameos sometimes. You know what's the saddest? When they flub it and they don't redo it. Oh, come on, man.

Dave Attell 22:01 It's really good how, like, um, you know, being older, like, you're like, "I wonder what these surviving cast members of Magnum PI are up to." I guess I can look on Cameo-

Joe Rogan 22:10 Yeah.

Dave Attell 22:10 ... and see which ones are available for a happy birthday message. You know?

Joe Rogan 22:13 What a weird thing.

Dave Attell 22:15 People love it.

Joe Rogan 22:16 You get famous people to wish you happy birthday. Who's the number one person on Cameo, Young Jamie?

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 22:22 It was-

Joe Rogan 22:22 If you had to guess. Is it, uh-

Dave Attell 22:24 I bet you it's still Gilbert.

Joe Rogan 22:26 Was Gilbert really number one?

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 22:28 Oh.

Dave Attell 22:28 I think he was.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 22:28 I know who it is now, I think. At least for a while, those Island Boys took over for a minute.

Joe Rogan 22:33 But-

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 22:33 Those are the ones that went viral online.

Joe Rogan 22:34 Are they still around?

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 22:35 Because of that.

Joe Rogan 22:37 It's really working still?

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 22:38 I think.

Joe Rogan 22:38 Good for... I hope they stay around forever. I hope them, they get together with that girl, the Catch Me Outside girl, and they, they make super babies.

Dave Attell 22:44 She was, uh, yeah, she definitely would be a hit.

Joe Rogan 22:46 Super influencer babies. (laughs)

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 22:50 (laughs)

Dave Attell 22:50 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 22:50 'Cause it's funny when people, like, become successful-

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 22:53 Oh, wow.

Joe Rogan 22:53 ... and like that for no fucking reason and people get mad. Like, "What the fuck? Why is there baby pictures now?"

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 22:58 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 22:58 Like, why are you mad? Like, look at this. It's ridiculous. It's fun.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 23:01 The top earners are kind of a surprise. It's Kevin from The Office.

Joe Rogan 23:04 Put that shit up. Let's-

Dave Attell 23:05 Really?

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 23:05 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 23:06 What do we got?

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 23:07 It says, uh, Brian Baum- Baumgartner is his name.

Joe Rogan 23:09 Interesting. Is he really good at it or something?

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 23:12 I, I th- I don't know.

Joe Rogan 23:14 Huh.

Dave Attell 23:17 Wow. You could do like-

Joe Rogan 23:18 Click on the thing.

Dave Attell 23:20 You got a whole day's worth of great-

Joe Rogan 23:21 So that dude?

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 23:22 Yeah.

Dave Attell 23:23 Wow.

Joe Rogan 23:23 Good for him.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 23:25 Lookit this time, which was, uh, 2020, November '21.

Joe Rogan 23:29 Cost to businesses, 2,600 bucks. Damn, you could rack up some numbers.

Dave Attell 23:33 Yeah, really.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 23:33 It was Gilbert. He was up there.

Dave Attell 23:35 Yeah, Gilbert would do, like, 10 a day. I mean, if, if not more, you know?

Joe Rogan 23:39 That's a lot of money, man. Michael Rappaport's in there?

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 23:44 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 23:44 How many is Rappaport doing? How much does it cost to get Rappaport to talk shit to you?

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 23:48 Uh, 200 bucks.

Joe Rogan 23:49 Damn. That's a good deal. So anybody gets to pick the number?

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 23:54 There's Carole Baskin.

Joe Rogan 23:56 She's on it? Joe Exo-

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 23:58 She is.

Joe Rogan 23:58 Joe Exotic should be on if she's on it. Where's your husband?

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 24:01 (laughs)

Dave Attell 24:01 Who-

Joe Rogan 24:01 Where's your husband, lady?

Dave Attell 24:05 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 24:05 (laughs)

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 24:05 (laughs)

Dave Attell 24:05 Yeah, I gotta learn to, like, make some money online or something like that.

Joe Rogan 24:07 Imagine that? Did she really... Uh, if, if, let's just say if, we're not alleging anything, but if she really did feed her husband to a tiger-

Dave Attell 24:14 Right.

Joe Rogan 24:14 ... can you get her to wish you a happy birthday? That is fucking hilarious.

Dave Attell 24:17 That's how I wanna go too, is food. I think that's a great way to go out.

Joe Rogan 24:21 It is kinda weird-

Dave Attell 24:22 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 24:23 ... that we kinda cheat on the food-... pyramid-

Dave Attell 24:25 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 24:25 ... thing, 'cause we, we embalm ourselves so we don't rot-

Dave Attell 24:28 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 24:28 ... so nothing can eat us. It's a real, it's a dirty trick.

Dave Attell 24:32 Like, the alligator pit would be kinda fun, don't you think?

Joe Rogan 24:35 When your body's done?

Dave Attell 24:36 Yeah, they just-

Joe Rogan 24:36 Just have a little celebration, throw you in a pit full of alligators?

Dave Attell 24:39 'Cause they have zero respect, you know, the way they roll, you know, how they kill th-, you know, how they kill, they roll.

Joe Rogan 24:45 Oh.

Dave Attell 24:45 Oh, that would be, just seeing myself twerking around like that, uh.

Joe Rogan 24:48 Jamie, did I show you the video of the crocodile that's swimming with a body in its mouth, a human body in its mouth? Did I send that to you? This one's rough. Um, I, someone sent, sent this to me on Instagram. Um, it's a, uh, crocodile, and it's swimming up to this boat, and it sounds like they're from Australia or South Africa. It's hard to tell, but, uh, they're, 'cause I don't, I'm not good at accents.

Dave Attell 25:13 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 25:13 But they're, um, they're trying to, uh, figure out what it is, and then they realize it's a human.

Dave Attell 25:18 Oh, no.

Joe Rogan 25:19 Oh, dude, it's rough. It's rough. I'm gonna try to find that.

Dave Attell 25:22 Okay, this is the kinda stuff...

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 25:25 You think this is it?

Joe Rogan 25:26 Uh, it-

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 25:27 I'm waiting for the video to load, but-

Joe Rogan 25:27 Could be it.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 25:28 ... it's not.

Joe Rogan 25:28 Could be it.

Dave Attell 25:30 Yeah, that's a crocodile, right?

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 25:31 Oh, there it is, down there. No, that's not it.

Joe Rogan 25:33 No, that's not it.

Dave Attell 25:34 That looks-

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 25:35 Yeah, I think, I think they're just showing croc videos.

Joe Rogan 25:37 They're not gonna show the video?

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 25:38 I don't think so. Let's see. Maybe.

Dave Attell 25:39 This guy's fighting him off with his-

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 25:41 This guy just took a video-

Joe Rogan 25:41 I have-

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 25:42 ... and posted on Twitter. You want it?

Joe Rogan 25:43 I guarantee you I have it in here. If you just-

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 25:44 Wow.

Joe Rogan 25:44 ... give me one second, I'll find it.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 25:46 Extremely graphic footage. Here, this?

Joe Rogan 25:49 Is this it? No, that's another one.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 25:51 Oh, no.

Joe Rogan 25:53 That's another one with a body on-

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 25:54 Yeah, this was from a month ago.

Joe Rogan 25:55 I've seen that one too. Bro, seriously. (water splashing) Oh, Jesus.

Dave Attell 26:01 Wow.

Joe Rogan 26:01 Yeah. Yeah, that's it. That's the one. That's the one.

Dave Attell 26:04 Wow.

Joe Rogan 26:05 So look at that.

Dave Attell 26:06 Hmm.

Joe Rogan 26:07 Bro, that is fucking rough.

Dave Attell 26:08 He de-pantsed 'em too.

Joe Rogan 26:09 That is fucking rough.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 26:11 By the arm.

Joe Rogan 26:12 That is rough. And it looks like the crocodile wants everybody to see it.

Dave Attell 26:15 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 26:15 That's what's most fucked up. (laughs)

Dave Attell 26:18 (laughs)

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 26:18 (laughs)

Dave Attell 26:18 Now, how much-

Joe Rogan 26:18 It looks like it's swimming over like it wants everyone to see that it killed a person.

Dave Attell 26:22 Now, I wanna, how much is that crocodile's cameo?

Joe Rogan 26:24 Is it... Bro.

Dave Attell 26:25 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 26:26 I just want you to look at that, how crazy that is.

Dave Attell 26:28 That is pretty...

Joe Rogan 26:29 That we accept the fact that monsters live near us, that we're, we're cool with that. Like, why are we cool with that?

Dave Attell 26:37 Well, I-

Joe Rogan 26:37 What the fuck is wrong with us?

Dave Attell 26:39 I think it puts us, like, kinda in our place a little bit, you know what I'm saying?

Joe Rogan 26:43 Yeah, is that necessary?

Dave Attell 26:44 Uh.

Joe Rogan 26:44 I get it.

Dave Attell 26:45 I don't know.

Joe Rogan 26:45 I don't think we should keep those things around.

Dave Attell 26:47 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 26:47 Everybody thinks we should keep them around. Like, I, I think shoot them in the fucking head and turn them into shoes.

Dave Attell 26:52 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 26:53 You're outta your fucking mind. Those things eat people. Like, we're just so far, uh, removed from nature that we think that... And I'm not advocating, honestly, I'm joking around.

Dave Attell 27:04 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 27:04 I'm not advocating for the elimination of all crocodiles.

Dave Attell 27:07 Right.

Joe Rogan 27:07 But the fact that people are, like, really comfortable being around them just blows my mind. Just, like, the, the, Florida is having more and more alligator attacks every year, like every... Is that true? I might have made that up. But I think there's been a, a number this year in Florida.

Dave Attell 27:21 Well, that's one of my favorite shows, where the guys get to go out and cull the herd, you know?

Joe Rogan 27:25 Oh, yeah.

Dave Attell 27:25 That's really cool, the way they do that, man.

Joe Rogan 27:27 Mm-hmm.

Dave Attell 27:27 I love it. And, uh, they're doing it now with the pythons 'cause that's another evasive-

Joe Rogan 27:32 Yeah.

Dave Attell 27:32 ... species, yeah.

Joe Rogan 27:32 That shows swamp people, right? What is this?

Dave Attell 27:34 I love it.

Joe Rogan 27:34 "Alligator attacks do happen in Florida, but not at an alarming rate." It's, one is an alarming rate.

Dave Attell 27:39 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 27:39 If one, one-

Dave Attell 27:40 And that's not what that guy thought.

Joe Rogan 27:40 ... person gets killed by a werewolf, (laughs) if one, if one a year gets killed by a werewolf, that's fucking alarming.

Dave Attell 27:46 That's about what that guy thought, too.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 27:47 I said it was only an average of six a year, and I feel like...

Joe Rogan 27:50 But I think this year, there was a few. I think a, a few people died this year. How many people died from alligator attacks in 2022? Just, just Google that real quick.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 27:58 Uh, okay, hold on-

Joe Rogan 28:00 I'm gonna guess. I think it's six. I think six people have died from alligator attacks. "Oh, that's nothing. What about drunk driving? What about Oxycontin?"

Dave Attell 28:08 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 28:08 What about... Yeah, yeah, yeah, that too. That too. But fucking also alligators.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 28:14 Four so far.

Joe Rogan 28:15 Four. How many, how many have just fucking disappeared? How many homeless folks just vanished?

Dave Attell 28:20 Mm.

Joe Rogan 28:21 One of my favorite stories was a guy stole a car, and the cops were chasing him, and he, uh, jumps out of the car on a bridge, and jumps in the water, and lands right on an alligator, and gets killed right in front of the cops.

Dave Attell 28:31 Oh, wow.

Joe Rogan 28:33 Like, he just-

Dave Attell 28:34 That's great.

Joe Rogan 28:34 ... landed, boom, right where the alligator was, just snaps him up, like, right away.

Dave Attell 28:39 Wow. Uh, you, you've been-

Joe Rogan 28:40 Fuck.

Dave Attell 28:41 ... you've been to New York lately or no?

Joe Rogan 28:43 Yes.

Dave Attell 28:43 Yeah. We got our own little thing going on over there now.

Joe Rogan 28:46 What's going on?

Dave Attell 28:47 I don't know. It's kinda, uh, it's kinda like a, um, um... You know, it's like a little bit of mayhem. You know what I'm saying? Like, especially the street people, like, pretty aggressive. And, uh, you know, it does feel like, um... (laughs)

Joe Rogan 29:00 Like, the homeless folks are aggressive?

Dave Attell 29:01 Yeah, just like, you know, there's a lotta, um, you know, psychosis out there.

Joe Rogan 29:05 Mentally. Yeah.

Dave Attell 29:05 There's a lot of whatever's going on, a lot of aggressive panhandling, a lot of just like, "I can do whatever I want whenever I want" going on.

Joe Rogan 29:11 Right.

Dave Attell 29:12 So it's kinda old school New York, like more like in the '70s, '80s than it is... And it's filthy. You know, it is that kinda like... It's like, it's like Gotham without Batman, you know? That's really-

Joe Rogan 29:21 Oof.

Dave Attell 29:21 ... what it is. It's just pretty much outta control. But, uh, you definitely see, like, um, rats. Like, have you ever seen, um, (smacks lips) a, a tornado of rats?

Joe Rogan 29:30 I've seen a lot of rats before.

Dave Attell 29:32 I saw, like, I was walking from the Comedy Cellar, like, uh, up towards Washington Square Park late at night, and just, like, a bag of garbage, like... And then it was just, like, a circle of rats. I was like, "Oh, this is like the end of days." Like, right here, I was like-

Joe Rogan 29:45 Oh, my God.

Dave Attell 29:45 ... "Holy shit, is this like a sign?" I was like, I couldn't believe it.

Joe Rogan 29:48 I parked at this gas station once in the '90s back when you had to use payphones. So I pulled into the gas station, start pumping my gas, and I go over to use the payphone. And as I'm using the payphone, I'm watching rats jump on my wheel and crawl up into my car.

Dave Attell 30:02 Dude, and you drove that car?

Joe Rogan 30:03 I had to. What am I gonna do?

Dave Attell 30:05 Oh, shit.

Joe Rogan 30:05 I mean, what the fuck do you do?

Dave Attell 30:06 That's brave.

Joe Rogan 30:07 I felt like if I started it up, they would jump out.

Dave Attell 30:09 (laughs) What the-

Joe Rogan 30:11 I mean, like, what the fuck are they looking for? It's like they're looking for food or something, looking for a hole to get into the car and find food. It's like, there's-

Dave Attell 30:17 W- was it cold?

Joe Rogan 30:19 No. No, they couldn't-

Dave Attell 30:19 'Cause they go under the engine, they say, under the engine block-

Joe Rogan 30:22 Right.

Dave Attell 30:22 ... to warm up. They're really smart, you know.

Joe Rogan 30:23 They're so smart. Have you seen that jo- uh, the, uh, Rats documentary on Netflix?

Dave Attell 30:28 No.

Joe Rogan 30:28 Oh my God, you have to see it. It's incredible.

Dave Attell 30:30 I'm always afraid they're gonna swim up the toilet 'cause that happened-

Joe Rogan 30:33 They can.

Dave Attell 30:33 ... one time, though.

Joe Rogan 30:34 But that's enough?

Dave Attell 30:34 That probably happened one time.

Joe Rogan 30:35 One werewolf.

Dave Attell 30:36 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 30:36 I'm staying outta the woods. Fuck that, dude.... there was, uh, the documentary. It shows, uh, all the diseases that they carry. Like, there's, there's rats out there right now that have the plague.

Dave Attell 30:47 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 30:48 They, they're, they're around people. There's like, they, they caught some in Georgia, and they did th- they ran some studies on them. They found all kinds of crazy diseases in these things.

Dave Attell 30:56 But you know Naked and Afraid, you know those guys?

Joe Rogan 30:57 Yes.

Dave Attell 30:58 Those guys, like they have the two guys. They have the hunter guy, and then they have the other guy who's the scrounger. You know, he just, the scavenger guy. And he would eat that. He would eat it. He would figure out a way to like de-plague it, and like, skin it, and like, just eat it.

Joe Rogan 31:09 Eat a rat?

Dave Attell 31:09 Yeah. He's awesome the way he does his stuff, man.

Joe Rogan 31:11 You can eat a rat. You just have to cook it to like 167 degrees.

Dave Attell 31:16 I-

Joe Rogan 31:16 That's what kills trichinosis. That's the most dangerous one, but even that doesn't kill you. The- there's all sorts of other shit that can be carried in those things, though. Like, someone, um, ate, uh, burbot liver and they got the bubonic plague.

Dave Attell 31:29 Oh.

Joe Rogan 31:29 I think it was like a traditional dish in whatever country they're from, and they ate... Find that out. Eat burbot, burbot, B-U-R-B-O-T. It's like, um, some weird mammal. And, uh, they ate its liver.

Dave Attell 31:43 They got the plague.

Joe Rogan 31:44 And they got the plague.

Dave Attell 31:45 Classic.

Joe Rogan 31:45 Yeah. Which is like, what the fuck, man?

Dave Attell 31:48 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 31:49 (laughs)

Dave Attell 31:49 (imitates explosion) (laughs)

Joe Rogan 31:50 Like, rats are around people all day long in numbers that are... Like, they think that the physical size of the rat population, in terms of like their biological mass, their weight, is the same as people.

Dave Attell 32:03 Wow. You mean all the people-

Joe Rogan 32:04 Yes.

Dave Attell 32:04 ... to all the rats?

Joe Rogan 32:05 All the people and all the rats. Marmot. Yeah, marmot meat. He ate raw marmot meat. So a Mongolian couple died from bubonic plague in 2019.

Dave Attell 32:16 Wow.

Joe Rogan 32:17 Sparking a quarantine that trapped tourists for days.

Dave Attell 32:20 Yeah, see?

Joe Rogan 32:21 So a marmot is like a, like a little gopher-looking thing.

Dave Attell 32:24 Oh, okay. That's a different story. Yeah.

Joe Rogan 32:26 So they, they ate this thing and they got the fucking plague. I think it was, wasn't it raw?

Dave Attell 32:31 In New York?

Joe Rogan 32:31 Yeah, they ate raw marmot meat. Yeah, bro.

Dave Attell 32:35 In New York, they, uh, you know the dog park?

Joe Rogan 32:37 Yes.

Dave Attell 32:38 There was a rat in the middle, and all the dogs, like were trying to be dogs. Like, they're like trying to like attack him. But you could tell like they already had been too metro, that they really didn't know what to do. Like, they were like, "Uh, my assistant will do this."

Joe Rogan 32:50 (laughs)

Dave Attell 32:50 You know, stuff like that. (laughs) You know, "We'll send a smaller dog in there to do this."

Joe Rogan 32:53 Have you ever seen the video of the rat killing the pigeon?

Dave Attell 32:56 I love that one. Oh, that's a great one, isn't it? (exhales) Oh, man.

Joe Rogan 33:00 I didn't know they hunted.

Dave Attell 33:02 Oh, God. They're so good.

Joe Rogan 33:04 I just assumed, I just assumed they killed things that were already dead. I didn't know they killed things too. That was-

Dave Attell 33:07 Some people keep them as pets. Yeah, that's the one I'm talking about.

Joe Rogan 33:09 That's an eye-opener.

Dave Attell 33:11 This is great.

Joe Rogan 33:12 The thing about that rat too, when a rat is that fucking brazen, a lot of times that's a rat that has toxoplasmosis.

Dave Attell 33:19 Probably, yeah.

Joe Rogan 33:20 Oh, dude. Most definitely.

Dave Attell 33:22 Look at him, outgunned, outnumbered. He's still holding-

Joe Rogan 33:24 But look at him. He's bouncing-

Dave Attell 33:25 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 33:25 ... around in the middle. Like, he's not running to hide. Like he's, he's kind of like hanging out in the middle.

Dave Attell 33:31 Could have been injured a little bit there too.

Joe Rogan 33:32 He could have been.

Dave Attell 33:33 This is kind of like a Pee Wee football where you want your dog to go in and make the kill. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 33:37 All those dogs are going to the vet afterwards. They're getting multiple shots.

Dave Attell 33:40 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 33:40 You guys fucked up.

Dave Attell 33:41 They're all New York dogs too. They're like, "Oh my God. I'm traumatized." (laughs)

Joe Rogan 33:44 Oh my God. They're gonna have therapy. They're gonna have so many shots. Like you-

Dave Attell 33:47 Yeah, you have to.

Joe Rogan 33:48 'Cause like you have to get rabies shots. You have to get everything.

Dave Attell 33:50 I loved when I went to your old house out in, uh, in LA, right? The dogs you had, those big, big dogs.

Joe Rogan 33:57 Which ones, the pit bulls?

Dave Attell 33:59 The ones that were outside-

Joe Rogan 34:00 Was it the pit bulls or the, um, or was it the, um, the mastiff that I had?

Dave Attell 34:04 The, the mastiff, yeah.

Joe Rogan 34:05 Yeah, the mastiff was a sweetie.

Dave Attell 34:06 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 34:06 He was the best. That was Johnny Cash.

Dave Attell 34:08 Man.

Joe Rogan 34:08 He was so sweet.

Dave Attell 34:09 I love that dog.

Joe Rogan 34:09 He was so sweet. Those dogs, man. The big dogs, when they get older, it's rough on them, man.

Dave Attell 34:15 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 34:15 It's, I used to have to carry him to take him to the bathroom. Like he would, he couldn't walk anymore.

Dave Attell 34:19 How, how, how long did he, uh-

Joe Rogan 34:21 He lived to be 13, which is old-

Dave Attell 34:23 That's, that's amazing, yeah.

Joe Rogan 34:23 ... for a really big dog.

Dave Attell 34:25 That's amazing.

Joe Rogan 34:25 But it's so sad, man.

Dave Attell 34:27 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 34:27 You have them from the time they're a puppy-

Dave Attell 34:29 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 34:29 ... and then all of a sudden they're 13 and they can't walk. And like, "You're just a little boy." Like, "You're, you're my little buddy and you're 13." So I used to... He was like 140 pounds. I used to have to carry him outside.

Dave Attell 34:39 Wow.

Joe Rogan 34:39 I used to have to pick him up, take him outside to go to the bathroom.

Dave Attell 34:42 Yeah. But you gave him a great life though. I mean, what an awesome setup you had for him.

Joe Rogan 34:45 Well, it was a good yard.

Dave Attell 34:46 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 34:47 He was, he was a smart dog too. He was the one that... But he got honey potted into killing the chickens-

Dave Attell 34:51 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 34:51 ... by a coyote. Did I ever tell you this story?

Dave Attell 34:53 No.

Joe Rogan 34:54 He was, he was really big, you know. So he was a very strong dog. And so like chicken wire that kept coyotes out, that didn't keep him out. He just didn't go in there 'cause he didn't know that you can kill chickens.

Dave Attell 35:03 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 35:05 So one day (laughs) -

Dave Attell 35:06 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 35:06 So one day the pool guy had accidentally left the gate open that led to this other part where the pool is and where the chicken coop was. And so, um, this fucking coyote was teaching him to be his friend.

Dave Attell 35:19 Oh.

Joe Rogan 35:20 And the coyote would like come to the fence, like, "I'm your friend." And he was friendly. He was like, "Oh, you're my friend." He just thought it was a dog, right?

Dave Attell 35:25 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 35:25 And then we had this chicken that was brooding. I don't know if you know what brooding is, but-

Dave Attell 35:29 No.

Joe Rogan 35:29 ... when a chicken thinks that it has to raise an egg even though the egg hasn't been fertilized, it's called brooding. They get kind of crazy and they pick at their feathers and then they sit on an egg and they, they just insist that this egg, even though it's not fertilized, is gonna become a chicken. So-

Dave Attell 35:44 But it's a real egg there?

Joe Rogan 35:45 It's a real egg.

Dave Attell 35:45 Okay.

Joe Rogan 35:45 They lay an egg, but something goes bonkers in their brain and they have to go through this whole cycle of when the chick will be born, before they sh- shake out of it. Or you take them and you isolate them in a smaller pen. So I took them and I isolated them, and you put them on this post where they have to stand up. And if they have to stand up, then they can't brood, 'cause they can't like sit on that thing. They pick their feathers out and shit. It gets rough. So we had this one chicken that was separated. And so the coyote convinced Johnny to destroy the chicken coop.

Dave Attell 36:13 Uh-huh.

Joe Rogan 36:14 So I don't know how it did it, man. But all of a sudden, like he never did that before. But he just tr- he's, you know, he just destroys-

Dave Attell 36:20 He's huge.

Joe Rogan 36:20 ... this thing.

Dave Attell 36:21 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 36:21 Just pulls it apart and then... I'm with my kids and my wife and we're playing some board game. And so we're sitting there in the living room, we're playing like Uno or some shit. And then I see this ch- coyote leapfrog over the fence with a chicken in his mouth. It was amazing.

Dave Attell 36:37 Wow.

Joe Rogan 36:37 It was so graceful. Like we had this like six-foot ha- high wrought iron fence. It just went like this... (imitates coyote) ... to the top of the fence, boing, and then over it, like it was nothing, like it was nothing.

Dave Attell 36:50 And talk about like your dog to a coyote. A coyote weighs like what? 50 pounds, right?

Joe Rogan 36:54 Maybe, not even that-

Dave Attell 36:55 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 36:55 ... I don't think. And it just carried that chicken like it was nothing, but he- it convinced my dog to smash open this thing. So then, my pool guy fucks up again and leaves the gate open, so Johnny decides, "I'm just gonna go in the big chicken coop." So he just smashes a hole-

Dave Attell 37:12 Uh-huh.

Joe Rogan 37:12 ... in the big chicken coop and goes on a massacre and kills nine-

Dave Attell 37:16 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 37:16 ... chickens. So I have to g- I see it outside from like- from my bathroom. I'm like, "Fuck," I run out there and I gra- I have to go through-

Dave Attell 37:25 Right.

Joe Rogan 37:25 ... the hole that he created, and I grab him and drag him out.

Dave Attell 37:28 Man, that must have activated something deep in the-

Joe Rogan 37:30 Oh.

Dave Attell 37:30 ... back of his brain when he got that chicken blood in him, "Mm, I'm getting hard."

Joe Rogan 37:34 Well, the coyote just convinced him, like, "Why aren't you killing these chickens?" He's like, "Why are I killing these chickens?" (laughs)

Dave Attell 37:38 Right.

Joe Rogan 37:38 And then all of a sudden he's killing chickens.

Dave Attell 37:40 You know the big dogs. So your dog is not the dog that they have like in the Russian prisons, right? That crazy-

Joe Rogan 37:46 No. Well, I don't know what- which ones they use but-

Dave Attell 37:47 It's the wolf something, the wolfhound.

Joe Rogan 37:49 Oh, I've seen that thing.

Dave Attell 37:50 Whatever that is, that thing.

Joe Rogan 37:51 That big crazy hairy thing?

Dave Attell 37:52 Yeah, like-

Joe Rogan 37:52 Yeah.

Dave Attell 37:52 ... it- it- like, it lives and it dies outside. It's like basically, you know, it's like an outdoor dog.

Joe Rogan 37:58 Right.

Dave Attell 37:58 Like you never bring it inside, and when they do they bring it in, they shuffle the prisoners around like they're just barking, you know, growling at them the whole time, but-

Joe Rogan 38:05 That thing looks terrifying.

Dave Attell 38:06 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 38:06 It looks like something from The Hobbit.

Dave Attell 38:08 It- it is like, yeah, like you would see like a- a battle dwarf riding it. You know, that could-

Joe Rogan 38:12 Aren't they like fucking 200 pounds too? They're huge.

Dave Attell 38:14 Easily, easily.

Joe Rogan 38:15 What is that- that...

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 38:18 I don't know. A wolfhound maybe? I'll check.

Joe Rogan 38:18 I don't know what it is. Is it- it's not an Australian, right? No.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 38:21 Irish maybe?

Joe Rogan 38:22 No, it's Russian. It's a Russian-

Dave Attell 38:24 It's a Russian, it's their dog. It's like crazy big.

Joe Rogan 38:27 It's a w- oh, you just Google Russian werewolf dog.

Dave Attell 38:29 It's the one they use in their like lo- super max lockdowns.

Joe Rogan 38:33 Jesus.

Dave Attell 38:33 You know?

Joe Rogan 38:34 Like in Stranger Things?

Dave Attell 38:35 But in New York-

Joe Rogan 38:36 Did they have those in Stranger... No, they didn't. They had like German Shepherds. They probably can't use those things. Probably can't train them.

Dave Attell 38:41 In New York- in New York it became really cool to have a big dog again, and I think that's cool.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 38:44 I typed in Russian wolfhound, but that's not it.

Dave Attell 38:46 No.

Joe Rogan 38:46 (laughs)

Dave Attell 38:47 No, no.

Joe Rogan 38:47 No, no, no, no, no.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 38:48 (laughs)

Dave Attell 38:48 That dog- that dog you would only see like in an art gallery.

Joe Rogan 38:50 Try Russian werewolf dog. Try that. Let me see what Google has.

Dave Attell 38:55 It's like a wolfhound something.

Joe Rogan 38:58 Yeah, it's some-

Dave Attell 38:58 It is intimidating.

Joe Rogan 38:59 But if you- but if y- but if- I think if you Google Russian werewolf dog, it shows you what it is.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 39:03 I did. Ouch.

Joe Rogan 39:03 Not that. No, that's not it.

Dave Attell 39:04 Maybe the one to the right. Yeah that?

Joe Rogan 39:06 No.

Dave Attell 39:07 No? Something like that.

Joe Rogan 39:08 No, not either of them either.

Dave Attell 39:09 Oh yeah.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 39:10 That's a wolf.

Joe Rogan 39:10 No.

Dave Attell 39:10 No?

Joe Rogan 39:10 That's not it. That's just like a- a giant ass, those things.

Dave Attell 39:14 Wow.

Joe Rogan 39:14 Yeah, those are cool looking.

Dave Attell 39:16 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 39:16 That looks like Elton John's sister.

Dave Attell 39:18 (laughs)

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 39:19 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 39:19 It's, yeah, the, um... Did you see what fucking Biden said? "Blame it on this guy. We're spending all the money on AIDS." Did you see that?

Dave Attell 39:26 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 39:26 Did you see Biden's quote? It's so ridiculous.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 39:30 These are just wolves I think.

Joe Rogan 39:31 Yeah, not wolves. It's a- it's a giant Russian wolf-like dog.

Dave Attell 39:35 Ooh. I'm sorry I brought it up.

Joe Rogan 39:37 God damn it.

Dave Attell 39:37 I thought it would be like an easy hit.

Joe Rogan 39:40 No, that's a wolf bear. You're looking at like a hybrid.

Dave Attell 39:42 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 39:42 That's a... Google giant Russian werewolf dog. All right, let's see this.

Dave Attell 39:51 It's like a big head dog.

Joe Rogan 39:53 Yeah, it's crazy looking thing.

Dave Attell 39:54 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 39:54 Here it is.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 39:54 There.

Joe Rogan 39:55 I found it right away.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 39:56 Oh, I didn't have Google on there.

Dave Attell 39:57 Yes. That's it, that's it.

Joe Rogan 39:58 Wolf killer Caucasian Shepherd. That's it.

Dave Attell 40:00 Look at that.

Joe Rogan 40:00 Look at the size of that thing.

Dave Attell 40:02 Holy shit. Wow.

Joe Rogan 40:03 What the fuck, man?

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 40:05 That does, that's-

Joe Rogan 40:06 That can't be real.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 40:07 Yeah, that's not. That's not.

Joe Rogan 40:07 That can't be real. That's not real.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 40:08 No, that's not. That can't be.

Joe Rogan 40:08 That's- that's CGI.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 40:10 And that's a little...

Joe Rogan 40:12 That might be fake too.

Dave Attell 40:13 Yeah, that's a little fake.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 40:14 It is, it is but-

Joe Rogan 40:14 That's fake too.

Dave Attell 40:14 But it's a big dog.

Joe Rogan 40:15 Look at her arm. I don't like how her arm disappears in the hair.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 40:17 Yeah, she's wide. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 40:17 I'm getting- I'm getting v-

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 40:19 It's the same lady too, I think.

Joe Rogan 40:21 I'm getting swindled. Yeah, but that dog is a real dog.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 40:24 (clears throat)

Joe Rogan 40:25 The Ca- Caucasian Shepherd, so Google that.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 40:27 Okay.

Joe Rogan 40:27 Google Caucasian Shepherd.

Dave Attell 40:29 They look... They're amazing looking. Look at them in the snow, mm.

Joe Rogan 40:32 Yeah, that's it. That's that giant ass fucking wolf looking thing. Look at the size of that fucker.

Dave Attell 40:37 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 40:38 How big are those bitches?

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 40:39 Height, 2.2 feet. Shit.

Joe Rogan 40:42 2.2 feet.

Dave Attell 40:44 Wow.

Joe Rogan 40:46 That's not that big.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 40:46 I know.

Dave Attell 40:47 That's a cold weather dog for sure.

Joe Rogan 40:49 (laughs) Is this the- is this the wrong dog?

Dave Attell 40:50 (laughs)

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 40:50 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 40:51 That ain't the same dog.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 40:52 I think someone did a...

Joe Rogan 40:53 But it's that fucking other one though. There's one wild looking-

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 40:56 100 to 170 pounds.

Joe Rogan 40:57 Dog people are so mad right now.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 40:59 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 41:00 'Cause it's a big ass dog.

Dave Attell 41:02 Yeah. Now that was the picture but the girl was-

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 41:04 That thing looks big.

Joe Rogan 41:05 That-

Dave Attell 41:05 That's it.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 41:06 I think. Yeah.

Joe Rogan 41:06 That does not look like two feet. That thing looks fucking huge.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 41:08 No. Not two feet on the top, like from height.

Joe Rogan 41:10 That's... But that's bigger than two feet, dude.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 41:13 170 pounds max-ish.

Joe Rogan 41:15 Hmm.

Dave Attell 41:16 Look at that coat, man.

Joe Rogan 41:18 Brian Callen would know.

Dave Attell 41:20 It's definitely...

Joe Rogan 41:21 I'm gonna call him right now. Brian Callen knows about dogs.

Dave Attell 41:24 It's the, um...

Joe Rogan 41:25 Call Brian Callen.

Dave Attell 41:27 (sighs)

Joe Rogan 41:28 I have to get to the bottom of this, Jimmy.

Guest 2 (unidentified friend/producer) 41:29 I know. Well...

Dave Attell 41:32 I'm sorry for slowing down the show but I think we'll all be better people once we know.

Guest 3 (unidentified friend/producer) 41:35 Hey, buddy.

Joe Rogan 41:36 Brian Callen you're- you're live on my podcast. What, you would know this, what is that giant, crazy, scary Russian dog that looks like a werewolf?

Guest 3 (unidentified friend/producer) 41:45 I think that's a, uh, um, um, kovalsk or something like that. It's a, um, uh, damn it. Um, they're mountain dogs. They- they're- they're 200 pounds and they're there to keep the wolves at bay.

Joe Rogan 41:58 Right, that's what we're talking about.

Guest 3 (unidentified friend/producer) 42:00 But a kovalsk, is it- is it a kovalsk, something like that?

Joe Rogan 42:02 It's not a Caucasian mountain dog, right? Or a Cau- Caucasian Mountain Shepherd? That's a different thing.

Guest 3 (unidentified friend/producer) 42:07 They- they, I like using this word in a sentence, they hail from that area, I believe.

Joe Rogan 42:12 Oh wow, you look like a scholar.

Guest 3 (unidentified friend/producer) 42:14 Yes I am. Yes I am a scholar. But I have seen one, uh, in person and it's- it's as close to a dog bear as you can get. It's like they bred a dog, a big dog with a grizzly.

Joe Rogan 42:27 Wow.

Guest 3 (unidentified friend/producer) 42:27 That's what it's like. It's crazy.

Joe Rogan 42:27 And it has cra- crazy fangs, right?

Guest 3 (unidentified friend/producer) 42:30 Yeah. Well they fight them so- so in the Caucasus re- in Afghanistan, they fight.

Joe Rogan 42:35 I like how you say that. I like how you pronounce Afghanistan.

Guest 3 (unidentified friend/producer) 42:38 In Afghan- in Afghanistan they fight those dogs. In the Caucus mountains they fight dogs. And- and, uh, that- that area of the world, um...

Dave Attell 42:46 ... tho- those, they use those giant mountain dogs and they pit them against each other.

Joe Rogan 42:50 Anything, Jamie? I'm looking real hard. Caucasus mountains- Yeah. ... giant fighting dog? Yep, yep.

Dave Attell 42:55 Yes.

Joe Rogan 42:55 We'll find it. We'll find. All right, Brian. Love ya.

Dave Attell 42:58 Love you too, buddy.

Joe Rogan 42:58 Bye.

Dave Attell 43:00 (smacks lips)

Joe Rogan 43:00 Wow. That was good one- good work, Joe, man. We got it. I think we might have it.

Dave Attell 43:03 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 43:04 Well, that's what the Caucasus shepherd does. That's it? That's, I mean, that's what a Caucasian...

Dave Attell 43:08 Caucasus mountains.

Joe Rogan 43:08 But it looks scarier than that.

Dave Attell 43:10 Mm.

Joe Rogan 43:10 I've seen scarier ones.

Dave Attell 43:11 Either way, it's huge. It's a huge dog. You get a lot of dog for your money on that one.

Joe Rogan 43:19 Boy, that subject fizzle out.

Dave Attell 43:20 No, I got more if you want.

Joe Rogan 43:21 I was hoping for a big ending. I was hoping we're gonna find (smacks lips) the picture that I know that I've seen before, that thing with giant fangs.

Dave Attell 43:27 No, you gotta go to like, uh, what is that? Lo- Lockdown show, where they show them, like, using them to, like, just-

Joe Rogan 43:32 That's it. There's one. But that's the same-

Dave Attell 43:33 Yeah, see.

Joe Rogan 43:34 That's the Caucasian shepherd. Okay. S- yeah. But that's, that's the image that I've seen before, like that one. And then there was another one down, if you just go back to the one you just saw. It was another one down there, with his mouth open.

Dave Attell 43:45 Oh, there, they're fighting it up.

Joe Rogan 43:46 Yeah. That i- like, that's it. What is that? (laughs) What the fuck is that? That's what I'm talking about. Okay. It's, it's bad. So we just looked at, like, really clean-looking- Nice ones. ... well-bred ones.

Dave Attell 43:56 Wow.

Joe Rogan 43:57 Wow. That's it. They've still taken a lot of pictures and fucked up the thumbnail game. Oh my god. That's real.

Dave Attell 44:00 Beauty and the Beast.

Joe Rogan 44:01 Bro, that's the real dog.

Dave Attell 44:02 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 44:02 What'd you say, Jamie? This lady is in all of these thumbnails, so she's fucked up this thumbnail game.

Dave Attell 44:07 That's the thing.

Joe Rogan 44:08 Yeah, but, but that seems like it's not... Go back to that s- image of her next to the dog. That seems accurate.

Dave Attell 44:14 Hmm.

Joe Rogan 44:14 It seems like it's actually that big.

Dave Attell 44:15 That dog must eat.

Joe Rogan 44:17 Oh my god. The shits-

Dave Attell 44:18 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 44:18 ... that thing must take.

Dave Attell 44:19 Oh, yeah. That's a lot of work.

Joe Rogan 44:19 Good luck if you got a regular backyard.

Dave Attell 44:21 Mm.

Joe Rogan 44:22 You have-

Dave Attell 44:22 Oh, they look-

Joe Rogan 44:23 ... Hefty bags full of shit.

Dave Attell 44:23 They look cute there.

Joe Rogan 44:25 Look at that. That is looking cute.

Dave Attell 44:26 Oh, that's a fun-

Joe Rogan 44:27 Killing a wolf. (growls)

Dave Attell 44:28 Man, that'd be a nice oil painting.

Joe Rogan 44:30 It would be, right over your bed.

Dave Attell 44:32 Yeah. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 44:32 Let ladies know what they're in for.

Dave Attell 44:34 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 44:34 Kills wolves. All right.

Dave Attell 44:36 Cool.

Joe Rogan 44:36 So now we know. There you go. It's a thing. So we just got a bad, uh, bad image search.

Dave Attell 44:41 It's all right, though. I love that we, uh, went through it. But I'll tell you-

Joe Rogan 44:45 We made the journey together.

Dave Attell 44:46 ... we did it. And, uh, you know, all I'm gonna say is that it's a little too hot out here in Texas for that kind of a dog.

Joe Rogan 44:53 Hmm.

Dave Attell 44:53 You know, you'd have to give him so many, ugh.

Joe Rogan 44:56 Oh yeah, I got a-

Dave Attell 44:56 It's like-

Joe Rogan 44:56 ... golden retriever, and, and during the summer months, it's rough for him.

Dave Attell 45:00 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 45:01 But he loves swimming, so that's cool.

Dave Attell 45:03 Yeah, they, they're like built for swimming.

Joe Rogan 45:04 Oh my god. Yeah.

Dave Attell 45:05 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 45:05 I didn't even have to teach him how to swim. He just jumped in the water when he was a puppy.

Dave Attell 45:09 Really?

Joe Rogan 45:09 Yeah, like, like immediately.

Dave Attell 45:10 Oh, that's right. It's in their like DNA or something.

Joe Rogan 45:12 100%.

Dave Attell 45:12 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 45:13 It was like, "Immediately start swimming."

Dave Attell 45:14 Nice.

Joe Rogan 45:15 Yeah. He figured it out like right away. Just had to show him where the, where the stairs were, and then boom, he was good.

Dave Attell 45:20 Even the little ones like to take a dip.

Joe Rogan 45:22 Yeah.

Dave Attell 45:22 I like that. You know?

Joe Rogan 45:23 The thing about those dogs too is like, it's interesting, retrievers, 'cause they, that, um, teaching a dog to fetch and then bring it back, some dogs don't wanna bring it back.

Dave Attell 45:31 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 45:31 They're like, "Hey, motherfucker. Bring the ball back."

Dave Attell 45:33 Yeah. Possessive.

Joe Rogan 45:33 Retrievers immediately bring it back every time. Every time.

Dave Attell 45:36 You don't even have to teach them, huh?

Joe Rogan 45:37 Never. The only time he stops is I know he has to take a shit.

Dave Attell 45:40 Oh. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 45:40 It's like, oh. He paused. He doesn't come back all the way. He's gotta take a dump, and then he'll come run back over. But, those dogs are like designed for retrieving.

Dave Attell 45:49 Well, you know, being on the road, I can't have a dog, so I have to kinda live-

Joe Rogan 45:52 Yeah.

Dave Attell 45:52 ... vicariously through you guys with your dogs.

Joe Rogan 45:54 How often are you on the road? How many, uh, days a week?

Dave Attell 45:57 I'd say, ugh, I kinda stepped it up. You know, I got a lot of bills, so I've been stepping it up by trying to do like at least two to three week- weeks on the road, like of, you know, full til four to fi- four days, you know? And, uh-

Joe Rogan 46:10 Every month?

Dave Attell 46:11 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 46:12 Wow.

Dave Attell 46:12 And, uh, you know, like we were talking earlier, like the comedy boom is there. There's definitely like, like, uh, Cap City added a show, late show on a Sunday. Who would do that?

Joe Rogan 46:20 Oh, that's amazing.

Dave Attell 46:21 Why not, you know?

Joe Rogan 46:21 Why not? Fuck yeah.

Dave Attell 46:22 And, uh, everywhere I go, like, you know, it's like, "Oh, c- cool. We're close to Seoul. Let's add a show." You know, I'm like-

Joe Rogan 46:27 Beautiful.

Dave Attell 46:27 ... "I'm up for it. I'm already there, you know. Why not?" What else am I gonna do?

Joe Rogan 46:30 Boy, your machine gets greased when you're doing that many shows too?

Dave Attell 46:34 Yeah. But towards the end of the week, it does become this whole like-

Joe Rogan 46:37 (laughs)

Dave Attell 46:37 ... 'cause I know people are coming to see multiple shows. So I'm always trying to mix it up for them.

Joe Rogan 46:41 Right, right.

Dave Attell 46:41 And sometimes that falls apart on me. It's like a fucking ǀɹr, you know?

Joe Rogan 46:44 Yeah, but people that are coming to see multiple shows appreciate that too, that you're out there-

Dave Attell 46:48 I guess so.

Joe Rogan 46:49 ... fucking around. And-

Dave Attell 46:49 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 46:50 ... you know? I mean, that's half the fun for, for real comedy nerds, is to watch a guy like start a bit, and (laughs) then you see where-

Dave Attell 46:57 It crash?

Joe Rogan 46:58 ... that bit becomes in six months.

Dave Attell 46:59 (laughs) Oh, that's true.

Joe Rogan 47:00 I mean, how many, how many bits did you start out with a, in the first couple times you did 'em, they were like, you know, like, "Ugh. Might have to abandon this one"?

Dave Attell 47:06 You remember, um, this is another like old school comedy thing, but Richard Jeni? Do you remember him?

Joe Rogan 47:11 Oh, yeah.

Dave Attell 47:12 Yeah. Like he was always the guy who, you know, I like worked with him. I used to watch him. And I was always like, you know, nobody could crush like this guy did. And I've talked to oth- the younger comics about it too. I go like, "This guy," like people... You know how always people leave going like, "Oh, my belly hurt." Like people basically were, it was like, it was like a smack down. Like people like were leaving like, you know, limping and stuff. Like, they're like, "My body can't take any more laughter." He's that good. He would just basically get everything out of them. He was like the master of like milking a bit.

Joe Rogan 47:40 Yeah.

Dave Attell 47:40 Like he would find every angle on it. And I wish I had that skillset, like where you can go, like you take the topic and you like keep twisting it, and twisting it-

Joe Rogan 47:47 Yes.

Dave Attell 47:47 ... and twisting it, and twisting it. Like Brian Regan's another guy who I think is a great like... He's amazing how he finds all these different angles.

Joe Rogan 47:54 Yes.

Dave Attell 47:54 And like it's fluid. It's seamless, you know? And I-

Joe Rogan 47:56 Jeni was the best at it.

Dave Attell 47:58 Jeni was like... He really was exceptional at writing like a chunk of material, not just a joke. Like I'm a joke guy. He's like a chunk guy, you know?

Joe Rogan 48:05 Any... A chunk on anything?

Dave Attell 48:07 Yeah. On everything actually, 'cause that was back in the day. Some of it might be a little like, you know, corny whatever now. But back in the day, all that stuff was solid, and people couldn't get enough of it. And I remember like 10, 15 minutes on like spaghetti.

Joe Rogan 48:20 Yeah. (laughs)

Dave Attell 48:20 You know (laughs) like something like that, you know? Like, like buying shoes, that was like an hour and a half material.

Joe Rogan 48:25 He had a whole chunk on buying a Corvette. I'm like, "How is that even relatable to people?" And it was murderous.

Dave Attell 48:29 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 48:30 A murderous chunk about going to a dealership and buying a Corvette.

Dave Attell 48:33 He was a good guy to watch live, you know. You really kinda got like what a headliner does, you know?

Joe Rogan 48:38 I, I tell this story, and unfortunately if you've heard it before, people, you're gonna hear it again. Uh, one time we were at a East Side Comedy Club, and I got there on like a Sunday. And the guy who was the host of, uh, the show all weekend said Jeni did four different hours.

Dave Attell 48:52 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 48:52 He did two different hours on Friday night, and then two shows on Saturday night, totally different hours.... and they were all like, "I want to quit comedy." (laughs)

Dave Attell 48:59 Another thing about him is that his energy's consistent all the way through. Like a lot of guys, like, I'm, I'm that kinda guy where it's like, yeah, first 20 minutes you're gonna see, like, me, like, I'm punching, you know? Then, then it's a lot of grappling, just like holding, holding the guy. And I feel like him... for him, it was almost like, you're never gonna wear me out.

Joe Rogan 49:16 Right.

Dave Attell 49:16 You're gonna get worn out before I even get tired, you know?

Joe Rogan 49:19 Right.

Dave Attell 49:19 So I respect that too. Like...

Joe Rogan 49:21 No, he was, um... he was a special comic that I don't think gets his due. I, I kinda... I was always a giant fan of his, but then one day, I was coming home from the Irvine Improv. And you know how sometimes your, uh, Bluetooth on your phone just randomly syncs up and plays a track that's on your phone?

Dave Attell 49:35 Uh-huh.

Joe Rogan 49:36 It played this Jenny bit, and I was like, "Oh my God, that is so funny. I forgot how funny it was." And then, uh, I downloaded the whole album, and I just listened to it while I was driving. So that was the beautiful thing about like, uh, that it was available-

Dave Attell 49:50 Yeah, right.

Joe Rogan 49:50 ... on, uh, Apple Music. I just went and got it. Ding.

Dave Attell 49:53 Uh-huh.

Joe Rogan 49:53 Downloaded it. And now, I was listening to it on the way home.

Dave Attell 49:57 Well, that's, that's perfect score, 'cause there's no better place to listen to comedy than when you're driving alone. I feel like that's-

Joe Rogan 50:03 Yeah.

Dave Attell 50:03 That's where it is like... it is your thing. You know what I'm saying?

Joe Rogan 50:06 Yeah, if you're listening to comedy, that's, that's-

Dave Attell 50:07 Like a long drive and you get to listen some, like, really tasty clips.

Joe Rogan 50:10 Yes.

Dave Attell 50:11 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 50:11 It's fun. And especially if you're on your way to a gig, puts you in a good mood, get to the airport laughing.

Dave Attell 50:16 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 50:16 You know?

Dave Attell 50:17 Well-

Joe Rogan 50:18 It-

Dave Attell 50:18 Uh, the whole idea of the album now is so different than it was back in the day of like, you know, this is my album-

Joe Rogan 50:25 Yeah.

Dave Attell 50:25 ... because it's all at the show and all that kinda stuff, so yeah. I think-

Joe Rogan 50:27 Physical copies of things.

Dave Attell 50:29 I still feel like that's the best way, even though like, that's what I grew up on, like, listening to Carlin, you know, and all that.

Joe Rogan 50:34 Well, Skanks For The Memories was a masterpiece.

Dave Attell 50:36 I don't... I-

Joe Rogan 50:37 Skanks For The Memories is a a all-time classic comedy album. I know you fucking hate compliments. (laughs)

Dave Attell 50:42 No, but I, I, I really don't... wouldn't even put it in like-

Joe Rogan 50:45 It's very funny.

Dave Attell 50:46 A lot of people come up to me and they ask me about it and all that kinda stuff, but I, I, I do know that like... I haven't put out a lot of stuff, but that was one of the things that definitely did click with the comedy audience and-

Joe Rogan 50:54 It was fun.

Dave Attell 50:55 You guys have always been pretty cool with me about that too, but do you feel like, um, vinyl is like the future or the past or... 'cause there's a lot of vinyl talk out there.

Joe Rogan 51:04 Well, the vinyl talk is fun 'cause it's like someone who's an actual enthusiast, who wants to sit down with a physical copy of something.

Dave Attell 51:10 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 51:10 And it's so much better than owning a CD, right? 'Cause if they're both obsolete, which they kinda are-

Dave Attell 51:15 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 51:15 The thing about vinyl over a CD is you get a dope cover.

Dave Attell 51:18 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 51:18 That was always the thing, like Kiss-

Dave Attell 51:19 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 51:19 ... Alive 2, you know-

Dave Attell 51:21 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 51:21 ... where they're on the cover like, "Fucking yeah." You remember that? Double platinum was all silver. This is wild. Pictures inside. You would roll joints using the album. That's how people would roll joints.

Dave Attell 51:32 When I would go to Tower Records, you know, and like, uh... they would have like the comedy section, it was always like the Steve Martin-

Joe Rogan 51:37 Yes.

Dave Attell 51:38 And, uh, you know, Richard Pryor, of course.

Joe Rogan 51:39 Yes.

Dave Attell 51:40 But then there was like all the weird stuff, Dr. Demento and all this like-

Joe Rogan 51:43 Yes.

Dave Attell 51:43 ... you're like looking at these things, like looking around, see if anybody's looking at you, you know.

Joe Rogan 51:47 I went to a Gas Stop once, and I got these cassettes that were old Richard Pryor cassettes-

Dave Attell 51:53 Uh-huh.

Joe Rogan 51:53 ... from Redd Foxx's Comedy Club in Los Angeles. It was like someone just set up a microphone and started recording. And Richard Pryor was like fucking around, he was creating new bits, he was talking shit, he was drinking. You could hear like the clinking of the ice cubes on the glass.

Dave Attell 52:07 Wow.

Joe Rogan 52:07 Dude, it was amazing.

Dave Attell 52:08 And that's a cassette, right?

Joe Rogan 52:09 Cassette.

Dave Attell 52:10 Man.

Joe Rogan 52:10 And there was like a series of them. There was like a few that you could get.

Dave Attell 52:13 That's so awesome, dude.

Joe Rogan 52:15 Yeah. You... they would all... they... I think some guy sued somebody. I think DePaulo was involved in this. I think he sued them.

Dave Attell 52:21 Like a bootleg.

Joe Rogan 52:22 Yeah, someone was like selling their shit at gas station. They're like, they're like, "Why is my fucking shit for sale here?" Like, "Who's doing this?"

Dave Attell 52:29 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 52:29 It was like someone, someone had cut a deal.

Dave Attell 52:32 Right.

Joe Rogan 52:32 I don't think it was a bootleg. I think someone had cut a sneaky deal-

Dave Attell 52:35 But-

Joe Rogan 52:35 ... and not let the comics in on it.

Dave Attell 52:37 When you go to a truck stop and like, you know, you, you see their CDs and DVDs and it's like always Larry The Cable Guy, you know, they have all of his stuff.

Joe Rogan 52:44 Oh, of course.

Dave Attell 52:44 And I was always like, "Larry, you know, no one else has tapped this market. You're the only guy here. Honestly, dude, congratulations." I was like, I was like impressed that like... this is like... of all the things that they have here, you know, they got like... (laughs)

Joe Rogan 52:58 (laughs)

Dave Attell 52:58 You know, they got a little cooler, they got all these different things that are combined. It's like they definitely need some tapes as they're rolling, you know, rolling through, uh, down the road, so...

Joe Rogan 53:05 Larry The Cable Guy is a good dude.

Dave Attell 53:07 He is.

Joe Rogan 53:07 And-

Dave Attell 53:07 And he's a merch... king of merch. I always like respected-

Joe Rogan 53:11 (laughs)

Dave Attell 53:11 ... his merch, man. He's always been a cool guy, but like the merch, man, I was like, "How do you do it, buddy?"

Joe Rogan 53:16 I, I met him when he was, uh, Dan Whitney.

Dave Attell 53:19 Dan, yes.

Joe Rogan 53:20 You know, when he was, uh-

Dave Attell 53:21 He put the work in too.

Joe Rogan 53:22 Yeah. He was just starting to become Larry The Cable Guy. He just was doing that radio show-

Dave Attell 53:26 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 53:26 ... down Florida, and he would do that character, Larry The Cable Guy.

Dave Attell 53:30 And he would do the, um, call in to all the morning radios and he'd have to do this... and I was like, "Man, this is tough." It's like 6:00 in the morning, he's calling in, you know.

Joe Rogan 53:40 Yeah. But he's always been a cool dude. I met him in like 1993 or some shit in Montreal.

Dave Attell 53:45 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 53:45 And nobody knew who he was back then. Just a normal guy.

Dave Attell 53:48 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 53:48 He was a very normal guy.

Dave Attell 53:50 That's where I met Stanhope.

Joe Rogan 53:51 Ah.

Dave Attell 53:53 Stanhope and I, we had known each other, but that's like Montreal, like we really bou... you know, uh, bind, uh, bou... whatever, together and like, uh, I consider Doug still like one of the best, uh, comics ever.

Joe Rogan 54:04 He's one of the best ever. He's-

Dave Attell 54:05 There's no one like him.

Joe Rogan 54:06 He's one of my favorite people alive.

Dave Attell 54:08 And, uh, you know-

Joe Rogan 54:09 I love him to death.

Dave Attell 54:10 Doug is like the real deal, like, you know-

Joe Rogan 54:13 He, he's-

Dave Attell 54:13 All the good-

Joe Rogan 54:14 Yeah, he's great.

Dave Attell 54:14 ... and all the, all the amazing of like, you know, like a guy who doesn't give a shit, you know.

Joe Rogan 54:19 He's free.

Dave Attell 54:20 He is.

Joe Rogan 54:20 He's-

Dave Attell 54:20 That's, that's a great way to put it.

Joe Rogan 54:22 Genuinely free.

Dave Attell 54:22 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 54:22 He's not pretending to be free. He's free.

Dave Attell 54:25 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 54:25 You know, and he's, he's just a great guy. And, you know, when I had n- met Doug for the first time, I had heard of Doug before I met him.

Dave Attell 54:32 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 54:32 He was friends with Joey.

Dave Attell 54:34 Okay.

Joe Rogan 54:34 So that's how I met him. Uh, I think I met him at... (sighs) So there was like a l- a little show that they used to do on Sunset, down the street from Dublin's. Wasn't even Dublin's.

Dave Attell 54:46 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 54:46 It was the one down the street from Dublin's. I met him there.

Dave Attell 54:48 Like a open mic or...

Joe Rogan 54:50 No, it was like a show they would do. I mean, it wasn't necessarily an open mic 'cause everybody was on and was a professional.

Dave Attell 54:55 Uh-huh.

Joe Rogan 54:55 But it was like a pop in show.

Dave Attell 54:57 Right.

Joe Rogan 54:57 You know, sort of how Dublin's was. Remember when Dublin's was a pop in show?

Dave Attell 55:01 See, I never really w- it... was in LA like on that scene of like... but I always heard that that's like the cool show, that's where like, where the... where like, you know, the, um...... you know, where, if you just wanna, like, fuck around, that's a cool show.

Joe Rogan 55:12 Dublin's was a fun show. That was a fun show. Du- Dublin's was kinda what launched Dane Cook, he, he wa-

Dave Attell 55:18 Right.

Joe Rogan 55:19 Yeah, he was killing it at Dublin's before he was killing it ev- everywhere else. And then, it was like, uh, they had Dublin's, they had that other club that was down the street from Dublin's, it didn't last as long. And then, they, they had Sal's Comedy Hole. Do you remember Sal's Comedy Hole? (laughs)

Dave Attell 55:33 I remember, yeah, yep.

Joe Rogan 55:35 That was a good spot. There was a k- a bunch of, like, little fuck around good spots.

Dave Attell 55:40 Would you ever do that Hermosa Beach room?

Joe Rogan 55:42 I loved that room.

Dave Attell 55:43 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 55:43 The Comedy Magic Club, I love that room.

Dave Attell 55:44 That's like a museum to comedy.

Joe Rogan 55:46 Yeah.

Dave Attell 55:46 I hope it, I hope they, uh, you know, it continues, right?

Joe Rogan 55:49 Yeah, yeah.

Dave Attell 55:49 'Cause that was like, that's where Leno would work out his material, that's where Gary Shandling would go.

Joe Rogan 55:53 Yeah.

Dave Attell 55:53 You know, all the big... Uh, Tosh would come by, and, uh-

Joe Rogan 55:56 Yeah.

Dave Attell 55:56 ... I remember he always wanted it clean, you know. That was like the thing of like, you know, "I'm trying to keep it clean here," you know.

Joe Rogan 56:01 Yeah, but he let me go up.

Dave Attell 56:02 Yeah, I went up there too.

Joe Rogan 56:03 (laughs)

Dave Attell 56:03 He didn't really care. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 56:04 He let me go up. He, he, um, he'd had a problem with Joey Diaz though.

Dave Attell 56:09 Sure. Well, you know-

Joe Rogan 56:10 But it wasn't, it was just like his regulars. He was like, "My regulars just can't handle it."

Dave Attell 56:14 Hmm. Yeah, it's that beach culture, and that's not always the funniest crowd. You know what I'm talking about? Like, when you live near such a, like, you know, you got a beautiful sunset, you don't really need as many laughs as when you live near like a tire fire, you know.

Joe Rogan 56:25 Right. Well, there are wealthy people too.

Dave Attell 56:27 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 56:27 Hermosa Beach is a wealthy community. It's like, but so is, um, La Jolla, and that club's pretty wild.

Dave Attell 56:34 La Jolla-

Joe Rogan 56:34 The La Jolla Comedy Store, that's a fun place, that's a fun spot.

Dave Attell 56:38 I also like Irvine.

Joe Rogan 56:39 Irvine's fucking great.

Dave Attell 56:40 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 56:40 I love Irvine.

Dave Attell 56:41 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 56:42 That improv's amazing. I did that recently. I did that with Monty Franklin like a few months back. I did it with Shane Gillis too.

Dave Attell 56:50 Shane's awesome, dude.

Joe Rogan 56:51 Oh my God, dude.

Dave Attell 56:51 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 56:52 That, uh, doing shows at the Improv was one of the first times that I got to see Shane's set 'cause I, he killed at the Vulcan, but we were in the green room and it was packed and you couldn't hear. We, there, you know, there's a monitor in there and you can listen, but there were so many people who were talking, we were all having fun. I didn't get a chance to see his sets. But then getting to work with him in Irvine, I got to see his whole set. Goddamn, he's funny.

Dave Attell 57:12 He's good.

Joe Rogan 57:13 He's so funny.

Dave Attell 57:14 Yeah, I like... You know, like, he's in the y- he is like in... I see him in the city, so I only get to see small tastes of him, but it's always interesting stuff. The guy never panders to anybody.

Joe Rogan 57:23 No.

Dave Attell 57:23 I mean, like, you know, he knows what he wants to do when he does it, so...

Joe Rogan 57:25 It's just great writing too.

Dave Attell 57:27 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 57:27 He has this new bit about going to the George Washington Museum. That's all I'm gonna say about it. It's fucking amazing.

Dave Attell 57:33 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 57:33 It's so funny, dude.

Dave Attell 57:35 There's so many, um, you know, like... I, I really never g- I always go on so late, so like, uh, you know, the people who go on earlier, like, I never really get to see them. But when I do, I'm always like, you know, "Whoa, dude, where did this guy-"

Joe Rogan 57:46 Do you like that? Do you like going on late?

Dave Attell 57:48 Uh, I, I like it for different reasons than people think. It's like, I like it because I don't wanna, um, screw up the show for anybody who has to follow me in case I do something nuts or crazy, you know, like-

Joe Rogan 57:58 (laughs) Like what?

Dave Attell 57:58 ... becau- you know, in case I, like, trash, you know, trash the room, you know. So, I was always like, "There's that." I don't like bumping anybody. I don't like, you know... I think, uh, in comedy, there's a lot of bumping going on and like, I totally understand, like, you know-

Joe Rogan 58:10 Is that still going on?

Dave Attell 58:11 Well, I think that it's like, a big name comes in and they wanna do some material that's cool, but like a lot of these, uh, um, uh, young comics, you know, like, they're waiting around, like, you know, uh, to go on. And it's like, I n- I di- I hate being the guy who, like, puts them back, so there's that-

Joe Rogan 58:26 Yeah, that's not my thing.

Dave Attell 58:26 ... there's that. And then, it's also, I think later, um, I, I, I feel like I'm more into the, um, you know, in the zone of it, you know. Like, I've done everything I, I had to do, now I can just do my, you know, have some fun.

Joe Rogan 58:37 What time do you like to go up?

Dave Attell 58:38 Uh, in the city, I'd say like 1:00 in the morning, you know.

Joe Rogan 58:41 Really? That's your, that's your general set?

Dave Attell 58:43 (laughs) 1:00 to 2:00, yeah.

Joe Rogan 58:44 That's the first set of the day, is 1:00 AM?

Dave Attell 58:46 Yeah, sometimes. I mean, like sometimes I'll bounce before that. But usually, it's like during the week, like on a Tuesday, Wednesday night, it's probably like 12:50, 1:00 in the morning, you know.

Joe Rogan 58:54 Wow.

Dave Attell 58:55 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 58:55 And then how many will you do?

Dave Attell 58:57 Um, of that night?

Joe Rogan 58:58 Yeah.

Dave Attell 58:58 That would be just like for the like, just one, like a taste. But then on the weekend, I'll do like 2:00 or 3:00, and late, you know, like from like-

Joe Rogan 59:04 So, you just like to do like one show a night, fuck around?

Dave Attell 59:07 Just only if I have new stuff.

Joe Rogan 59:09 We-

Dave Attell 59:09 Otherwise, I feel really bad about like taking the stage time, like only if I've got like something new to say. But I'll go on every night, but I'll force myself to do, even if it's like telling a joke different, I gotta get up there and try it, so you know.

Joe Rogan 59:20 It's amazing your, uh, this humility that you have, like about that, about stage time. It's 'cause like every club would die to have you go up.

Dave Attell 59:28 Joe, I can't let up-

Joe Rogan 59:28 Every audience would love to see it. Like, this is what's crazy. It's like you're one of the best comics alive and you have this attitude like you're-

Dave Attell 59:34 I don't know about that.

Joe Rogan 59:34 ... a middle act that's, uh, that doesn't wanna fuck up the show for anybody.

Dave Attell 59:38 I will say one thing, like, you know when you go on the road and you go on early, and it's like, you know, you're like, "Whoa, these people are, you know, they're n- they're not as like..." It's harder going on late. I like the challenge.

Joe Rogan 59:50 Yeah.

Dave Attell 59:50 Okay. Especially since I'm old now and there's all these young h- people hitting with their killer 20. So, I like to see if I can still like bring it, you know.

Joe Rogan 59:57 Right.

Dave Attell 59:57 I guess that's kinda ego. But the, uh... when you go on early, then you're like, "Wow, this is a different type of tight," you know, "I'm-"

Joe Rogan 1:00:03 Yeah.

Dave Attell 1:00:03 "... ouch," you know. And sometimes I'll go on early just to mix it up, but I feel late is where my stuff works best, you know.

Joe Rogan 1:00:09 Well, you know, it's like, it's like you're rucking, you're out there hiking the hills with weights on your back.

Dave Attell 1:00:14 Oh, you think? (laughs)

Joe Rogan 1:00:15 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Dave Attell 1:00:15 I'm training.

Joe Rogan 1:00:15 And then it goes to like regular workouts, you're like flying through it, like a regular show.

Dave Attell 1:00:21 I, yeah, I, I'd say that like, you know, The Cellar especially is built late, like it feels better late than it does early. But, you know, the crowds there, you get a lot of different... Like, I guess you got that in LA too, where it's like you got Euros, you got locals, you got people-

Joe Rogan 1:00:34 Yeah.

Dave Attell 1:00:34 ... who are, you know, I guess domestic tourists, you know, people coming all the way in from Arkansas. So, you know, you get like kind of like a, a, a, a buffet of audience-

Joe Rogan 1:00:42 Yeah.

Dave Attell 1:00:42 And you get to see like where it hits, where it doesn't, and all that kinda stuff. So, there's good to that. But at the end of the day, like, I always leave like, you know, "What was that about? I can't believe they didn't get that."

Joe Rogan 1:00:51 It's a destination.

Dave Attell 1:00:51 You know.

Joe Rogan 1:00:52 Comedy becomes a destination, right?

Dave Attell 1:00:54 Well, that's what's gonna happen with your club, man. I mean, honestly, I bet you it's already sold out.

Joe Rogan 1:00:59 We don't have many tickets available yet.

Dave Attell 1:01:00 It doesn't matter. I, I, I, I can only imagine that first opening week, it's gonna be nuts.

Joe Rogan 1:01:05 It's gonna be fun.

Dave Attell 1:01:05 It's gonna be nuts, man.

Joe Rogan 1:01:06 It'll be fun. It's g- it's exciting to be able to do something from the ground up.... you know.

Dave Attell 1:01:10 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 1:01:11 And, uh, to have a community that's already here, 'cause we've been doing so many shows already here-

Dave Attell 1:01:15 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 1:01:15 ... that we... you know, we've been having a lot of fun, like, for the last two years.

Dave Attell 1:01:19 And will you, like, uh, you know... Well, you gotta be there, like, the opening for s- for sure, I'm sure.

Joe Rogan 1:01:26 Yeah, for sure.

Dave Attell 1:01:26 You, you gotta be.

Joe Rogan 1:01:26 Yeah, we're gonna be there.

Dave Attell 1:01:27 And it's, it's definitely gonna be, um-

Joe Rogan 1:01:29 Um, I want you to come too.

Dave Attell 1:01:30 It's gonna make the news, buddy. It's gonna make the news.

Joe Rogan 1:01:32 Oh, no.

Dave Attell 1:01:32 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 1:01:32 Not the news.

Dave Attell 1:01:33 (laughs) This is gonna be, like, one of those, like... You know, opening a club, anyhow, is so... People don't get it. It's not like a guarantee. It's not like saying, like, you know, "I'm gonna throw, I'm gonna throw into a," you know, whatever, like a, you know, uh, any kinda... Like, it's not just a