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The Joe Rogan ExperienceThe Joe Rogan Experience

Joe Rogan Experience #1879 - Sober October 4

Ari Shaffir, Tom Segura, and Bert Kreischer are stand-up comics and podcast hosts. Ari is the host of "The Skeptic Tank" podcast. His most recent special, "Ari Shaffir: Double Negative," is available via Netflix. Together, Tom and Bert are the co-hosts of the "2 Bears, 1 Cave" podcast. Tom also co-hosts a podcast with his wife and fellow comedian Christina Pazsitzky, "Your Mom's House," as well as his own Spanish language podcast: "Tom Segura en Español." His new book, "I'd Like to Play Alone, Please: Essays," is available now. Bert hosts his own podcast, "The Bertcast," and can be seen starring on TBS's "The Go-Big Show," and the YouTube cooking program "Somethings Burning." www.arishaffir.com www.tomsegura.com www.bertbertbert.com

Joe RoganhostAri ShaffirguestTom SeguraguestBert KreischerguestGuest (unclear which)guest
Jun 27, 20243h 15mWatch on YouTube ↗

EVERY SPOKEN WORD

  1. 0:00 – 15:00

    (drum roll) Joe Rogan podcast,…

    1. NA

      (drum roll) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.

    2. NA

      The Joe Rogan Experience.

    3. JR

      Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. (instrumental music plays)

    4. AS

      You got some stogies, Bert?

    5. TS

      I bought cigars.

    6. AS

      Sick.

    7. TS

      There's nothing better that, we already know we're talking about this, than a cigar and coffee in the morning.

    8. BK

      In the morning, yeah.

    9. AS

      It's nice.

    10. JR

      You know what's better? A joint.

    11. TS

      Uh, we should address that.

    12. JR

      Yeah, it's a real issue. (laughs)

    13. TS

      (laughs) Not with me, Tom.

    14. AS

      No, of course not.

    15. TS

      Dude, I'm, I don't have the cravings that Joe has.

    16. BK

      (laughs)

    17. JR

      I have got cravings, yeah. (laughs)

    18. TS

      You gotta see Stanhope. You gotta see Stanhope in the green room these days.

    19. JR

      Stanhope? (laughs)

    20. TS

      Are we re- are we recording? I'm-

    21. AS

      Wait, wait, are you-

    22. TS

      Fucking Stanhope over here. (laughs)

    23. AS

      ... are, you're not having any drinking cravings?

    24. JR

      Why are you saying Stanhope? 'Cause I smoked a cigarette?

    25. AS

      Uh.

    26. BK

      Chugging it.

    27. JR

      I smoked one yesterday.

    28. BK

      You s- you breathed it down in one gulp.

    29. JR

      No, no, no. I didn't even smoke the whole thing.

    30. TS

      If Camel cigarettes could do an ad of you sucking down a cigarette.

  2. 15:00 – 30:00

    I'm sure he would…

    1. TS

      see this as, like- but it's a video. He goes to his place.

    2. NA

      I'm sure he would have a different version of this story altogether. (laughs)

    3. TS

      Like, when you s- you can see the look in the gardener's face. Like, he makes everyone stop working, and then they all do, like, a traditional Bali chant. And then you can see they're just like, "Ah, fucking, okay, here we go."

    4. JR

      Oh, boy.

    5. NA

      Yeah, yeah.

    6. TS

      "White guy wants us to sing."

    7. BK

      (singing)

    8. JR

      Oh, no. And also be on film.

    9. TS

      (singing)

    10. JR

      And also be on film.

    11. TS

      Oh, it's- you-

    12. JR

      And also be on the internet, right?

    13. TS

      It's-

    14. JR

      Is this it?

    15. TS

      This is- it's gotta be the video where he's like-

    16. GW

      ... and I could see that he still kind of had, like, a- like, a kids approach to the whole thing.

    17. NA

      Are we on time, or am I late?

    18. GW

      They had to-

    19. BK

      It's like The Rock.

    20. GW

      ... catch a flight to Australia.

    21. NA

      He's a big fuck.

    22. TS

      He's a big motherfucker.

    23. BK

      Yeah.

    24. JR

      He's, he's got legit giantism now.

    25. GW

      A group of people who worked at Namale had formed a semicircle to-

    26. TS

      Look. (laughs) Look at the guy in the middle.

    27. GW

      ... uh, sing a traditional Fiji farewell song.

    28. JR

      Dude with the glasses is not here.

    29. NA

      Fiji. I have to say goodbye again. I'm so sorry-

    30. TS

      All of the men-

  3. 30:00 – 45:00

    Yeah. …

    1. JR

      water circulates.

    2. NA

      Yeah.

    3. JR

      So it's like you're in a fucking river. It's like (grunts) like, you never get, like, a thermal layer around your skin, so you're never comfortable.

    4. NA

      Mm-hmm.

    5. JR

      When you get out of that fucking thing after three minutes, you're like, (sighs) .

    6. NA

      Yeah, the relaxation.

    7. JR

      The weight of the world is just gone.

    8. GW

      Did, did you ever see the video I did where I had my Whoop on, and I did my heart rate in the sauna, and then I went right into the polar plunge, and it went from 145 to 65 in, like, three minutes?

    9. NA

      Wow.

    10. JR

      Wow.

    11. GW

      It's, see if you can find it. It's y- it's, it's, uh, sped up, so you can see it.

    12. NA

      Mm.

    13. GW

      But the W- my Whoop, my W- ... I, I, I fucking ... I've, I've ch- ... I, I don't, I can't tell if I slept good unless I look at my fucking recovery next morning.

    14. JR

      What is that strap?

    15. GW

      I got the new one.

    16. NA

      It's a strap.

    17. JR

      Fancy strap.

    18. NA

      Yeah.

    19. GW

      Yeah.

    20. JR

      What is it, like, uh, tie-dye?

    21. GW

      No, it's, it's camo- chemical on the camera.

    22. NA

      Camo fiber.

    23. JR

      Camo?

    24. NA

      Ooh, camo.

    25. JR

      Have you noticed a difference, or-

    26. NA

      I'm surprised you can even see it.

    27. JR

      Ooh, camo. Do you have different c- do you have different recovery since you stopped drinking?

    28. GW

      Oh, my r- well, my recovery on tequila is better than my recovery without alcohol.

    29. JR

      That's insane.

    30. TS

      ... look at this. Look at this. So, 141, right? 140. And then I just get in the sauna and you'll see-

  4. 45:00 – 58:58

    Yeah. …

    1. GW

      surf experience. And I surfed, like I surfed fucking solid two days, caught probably 25 waves. And there is a genuine, surreal connection with the earth when you're on a board sliding down a wave.

    2. JR

      Yeah.

    3. GW

      And you're moving over on the wave and you're just watching it. It's the coolest fucking thing that I've ever done. And then you look at these guys like, like Nathan Florence and Kai Lenny and, and, and, uh, and Koa Rothman who do... They're like fucking savages and they're going into jaws, towed in, and you're just like, or that, that- Those guys are wild.

    4. JR

      That's a different thing, though.

    5. GW

      That's, that's, that's true.

    6. JR

      That's a different thing. Those guys are adrenaline junkies to the extreme.

    7. GW

      But the connection those guys have with the ocean- ... is so primal. And I, I mean, there, you're right. There's- Dude, you know what would happen every day, like when we... 'Cause we did the same thing, we rented a house in Malibu, is that we would... Because the tide changes every day, right? Yeah. And when at low tide... Sometimes low tide would be, let's say, at 8:00 AM. So, you'd look out and the, the water would be so far out that there would be rocks that you normally don't see, right? And you're like, "Oh, wow." Like you can, you can walk into the ocean because the tide's so low. Dude, high tide made me respect and fear the ocean so much. Why, what do you mean? Because it would come up and hit the house with such violence on some days that you would go... If I, an adult who can swim, were down here right now, like most likely you would drown. Smashed. And, and you would get pulled out and die.

    8. JR

      Oh, yeah. Yeah, that happens all the time.

    9. GW

      I know, but like when you're living there, when you're living there, you're like, "Holy shit."

    10. JR

      Yeah.

    11. GW

      Because you're seeing it every day. You look down and you're like-

    12. JR

      Well, you know, the difference for me was at night.

    13. GW

      Yeah.

    14. JR

      During the day, the ocean is like this beautiful, inviting-

    15. GW

      At night you can see it?

    16. JR

      ... wonderful thing. At night it's dark.

    17. GW

      So dark.

    18. JR

      And you just realize like, "Oh my God, that's like a fucking 100 trillion gallons of water." Like what the fuck is that?

    19. GW

      The guy who discovered Hawaii... Not discovered, obviously there are people there first. John Cook.

    20. JR

      (laughs)

    21. GW

      John Cook, is that his name?

    22. JR

      Captain Cook?

    23. GW

      They ate him.

    24. NA

      They ate him.

    25. GW

      You know he, you know he-

    26. JR

      They ate him?

    27. NA

      They ate him.

    28. GW

      Really?

    29. NA

      They didn't eat him.

    30. JR

      Yeah.

Episode duration: 3:15:41

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