Joe Rogan Experience #1926 - Matt McCusker & Shane Gillis

Narrator 0:00 (drum roll) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.

0:04 The Joe Rogan Experience. (energetic music) Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day.

Joe Rogan 0:13 And we're up.

Shane Gillis 0:14 Yes.

Joe Rogan 0:15 What's up, boys? What's happening?

Matt McCusker 0:16 What's going on?

Shane Gillis 0:17 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 0:17 Not much.

Joe Rogan 0:18 Welcome aboard.

Matt McCusker 0:19 I'm all strapped in. (laughs)

Shane Gillis 0:20 (laughs) Yeah, you got your paper in front of you, you're ready to go.

Matt McCusker 0:22 No. Yeah, this was just here. How about it?

Shane Gillis 0:23 Just hit the book. You're ready to fucking take some notes, dude.

Matt McCusker 0:25 Exactly.

Joe Rogan 0:26 You seem like a guy ready to take notes.

Matt McCusker 0:28 Ah, it's pretty accurate.

Shane Gillis 0:29 We'll jot some notes.

Joe Rogan 0:30 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 0:30 Counter points. Actually. (laughs)

Shane Gillis 0:32 You'll see some notes.

Joe Rogan 0:34 (laughs) You guys start out together?

Shane Gillis 0:35 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 0:36 Nice.

Shane Gillis 0:36 Lived together, moved together.

Joe Rogan 0:39 Nice.

Shane Gillis 0:39 I was his best man at his wedding.

Joe Rogan 0:41 Oh, shit.

Matt McCusker 0:41 Yep.

Shane Gillis 0:41 This is my guy.

Matt McCusker 0:42 Gave a speech.

Joe Rogan 0:43 Wow.

Shane Gillis 0:43 Gave a speech.

Matt McCusker 0:44 His speech-

Joe Rogan 0:44 Oh, no.

Matt McCusker 0:44 ... his speech was nice.

Shane Gillis 0:45 Concise.

Joe Rogan 0:45 Was it good?

Shane Gillis 0:46 I was fucked up.

Matt McCusker 0:46 Unbelievable.

Joe Rogan 0:47 Were you?

Matt McCusker 0:47 Unbelievable.

Shane Gillis 0:48 Yeah. I was like-

Joe Rogan 0:49 Bud Lights?

Shane Gillis 0:50 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 0:51 How many?

Shane Gillis 0:52 I have no idea.

Joe Rogan 0:53 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 0:53 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 0:53 A wedding? Dude, you think Protect Our Parks or something?

Joe Rogan 0:56 Yeah. Became an abstract

Narrator 0:58 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 0:58 ... couple. My wedding, I like wet my pants. (laughs)

Narrator 1:02 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 1:02 And I was like, "Oh, shit. I gotta give a speech." I was like, "I'll be all right."

Joe Rogan 1:05 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 1:05 "I'm used to giving speeches." I got up there, I was like, "Uh, Matt's wife, you're crazy. Matt, you're fucking nuts. This thing might be crazy enough to work, folks."

Narrator 1:13 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 1:14 That was it. That was the whole speech.

Joe Rogan 1:15 (laughs) This thing might be crazy enough to work.

Shane Gillis 1:18 Isn't it wild that, like, so many people get married, but half of them fail?

Joe Rogan 1:22 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 1:22 Like, you would think that more people would be like, "Whoa, whoa, whoa."

Joe Rogan 1:25 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 1:25 Matt's-

Matt McCusker 1:25 I'm divorced. I was my second time around.

Shane Gillis 1:27 ... Matt's 50 years. (laughs)

Matt McCusker 1:27 Oh, really? I got married relatively young, though.

Joe Rogan 1:30 But I think then, it's like a practice run. Like, you learn, like, "Oh-"

Matt McCusker 1:33 Exactly.

Joe Rogan 1:34 ... "I can, I can fix this. Let me try this again."

Matt McCusker 1:36 Yeah. I mean, girlfriends, that was just like, that was like free play mode. That didn't even count. Getting married is fucked up. When like your, like, I just, I got married the first time 'cause it was like, I was just like, "Yeah, I'll get married, I guess."

Joe Rogan 1:48 When you got-

Shane Gillis 1:48 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 1:48 That was all I thought. I was like, "Cool."

Joe Rogan 1:49 When you got divorced, was it, was it a big de- was it a pain in the ass? Like, was it a big one?

Matt McCusker 1:54 I mean, yeah.

Joe Rogan 1:54 Or was it fairly-

Matt McCusker 1:55 I mean, it wasn't like, you know, we didn't have kids, so it wasn't like, you know, like...

Joe Rogan 1:58 But did you have to go through financial bullshit?

Matt McCusker 2:01 No, I didn't have any money.

Joe Rogan 2:02 That's good.

Shane Gillis 2:02 Jackpot.

Matt McCusker 2:02 I had absolutely nothing.

Shane Gillis 2:04 But watching people get drained, watching, like, rich dudes get drained. And you see them going from not having to worry about anything to, like, "Oh, shit."

Joe Rogan 2:13 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 2:13 Like, "How am I gonna cover my bills?" Yeah. I've seen-

Joe Rogan 2:17 Get rid of houses.

Matt McCusker 2:17 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 2:17 ... that house multiple times, man.

Joe Rogan 2:19 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 2:19 I've seen guys get hurt in divorces.

Joe Rogan 2:22 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 2:22 Hurt. Just like Leon Edwards in the head. He gets stiffened up. It's a miserable endeavor. It sucks. Even if you're not losing money, it's pretty shitty.

Joe Rogan 2:32 That's when we met. That's when me and Matt, Matt-

Shane Gillis 2:34 Yep.

Joe Rogan 2:34 I was like, w- we started hanging out and then he got a, he started getting a divorce and I was-

Shane Gillis 2:37 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 2:38 ... I was right there for it. It was nice. It was nice that-

Matt McCusker 2:40 I moved from a marriage into a house of, like, five comedians.

Shane Gillis 2:44 Oh, nice.

Matt McCusker 2:44 We all just-

Shane Gillis 2:46 Fucking sick.

Matt McCusker 2:46 ... got an air mattress.

Joe Rogan 2:47 Fucking nice.

Matt McCusker 2:48 Did two years on an air mattress.

Shane Gillis 2:49 That's nice.

Joe Rogan 2:50 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 2:50 My air mattress would deflate and I'd take it back to Walmart in a box, return it, get a new one.

Joe Rogan 2:54 Bro, if my wife ever leaves me, I'm buying a ranch and inviting everybody to live there.

Shane Gillis 2:58 (laughs) Yeah.

Matt McCusker 3:00 Usually women-

Joe Rogan 3:01 Let's go build, build you some houses.

Matt McCusker 3:03 Women do initiate.

Joe Rogan 3:04 I'm going to buy a giant chunk of land and I'll build-

Matt McCusker 3:07 Big crowd.

Joe Rogan 3:07 ... everybody a house. Let's go.

Matt McCusker 3:10 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 3:10 It'd be like Stanhope's though. It'd be a-

Joe Rogan 3:12 Let's go.

Shane Gillis 3:12 ... there'd be a fire eventually. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 3:13 Yeah, eventually. Yeah. Stanhope's roof, his ceiling caught on fire. Like what-

Shane Gillis 3:17 It was in his attic.

Joe Rogan 3:18 Like, what was going on up there?

Shane Gillis 3:19 It was in his att- I don't, it was an electrical fire.

Joe Rogan 3:20 Oh, yeah. No, that shit happens.

Shane Gillis 3:22 And he has, like, this metal roof, so it didn't, the roof didn't catch fire.

Joe Rogan 3:26 Oh, no.

Shane Gillis 3:27 So his shit just-

Joe Rogan 3:27 So just the house.

Shane Gillis 3:27 ... burned. Yeah.

Joe Rogan 3:29 Is it fixed-

Shane Gillis 3:30 Fixed.

Joe Rogan 3:30 ... or is it fucked for a while?

Shane Gillis 3:30 I doubt it. I think he's fucked for a couple months.

Joe Rogan 3:32 Is he still living there?

Shane Gillis 3:33 No.

Joe Rogan 3:33 I can see him living there with a big hole in the ceiling.

Shane Gillis 3:36 It would mean nothing to him.

Matt McCusker 3:37 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 3:37 Fucking view of the sky.

Shane Gillis 3:38 It would mean nothing to him.

Joe Rogan 3:39 Let's go.

Matt McCusker 3:39 It hardly rains out there anyway.

Shane Gillis 3:40 It gets cold at night. It does.

Joe Rogan 3:42 Yeah, it gets cold.

Matt McCusker 3:42 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 3:43 Isn't it wild it's, like, near Mexico, but it gets cold as fuck? The desert's weird.

Matt McCusker 3:47 Yeah, I've never been. I wanna go. It's awesome.

Joe Rogan 3:49 But why does it get so cold? Does it not re- retain heat?

Matt McCusker 3:51 The sand.

Shane Gillis 3:51 It's the sand.

Joe Rogan 3:51 Probably the sand. Is that what it is?

Shane Gillis 3:53 I don't know. I'm guessing, but-

Joe Rogan 3:54 I would guess this too.

Matt McCusker 3:54 I feel like the sand is just fucking-

Shane Gillis 3:56 Sand, yeah.

Matt McCusker 3:57 ... doesn't do shit.

Joe Rogan 3:58 Didn't Francis Ngannou-

Matt McCusker 3:59 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 3:59 ... have a very similar story about crossing the Sahara? When he crossed the Sahara, didn't he say it was, like, really fucking cold at night?

Matt McCusker 4:06 Yeah, it's freezing.

Joe Rogan 4:07 What? No, no, w- was that... Wow.

Shane Gillis 4:08 I don't get it.

Joe Rogan 4:10 It's like sand doesn't retain heat. Is that what it does?

Matt McCusker 4:12 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 4:12 It just doesn't hold the heat?

Matt McCusker 4:13 Water just passes through. It's fucking bullshit, actually.

Joe Rogan 4:15 Bullshit.

Matt McCusker 4:16 It doesn't do a goddamn thing.

Joe Rogan 4:18 You know what's hard?

Matt McCusker 4:18 It's hot as fuck and cold as fuck.

Joe Rogan 4:20 Lack of humidity.

Matt McCusker 4:20 What's that?

Joe Rogan 4:20 Lack of humidity. Lack of humidity. Ah, that makes sense.

Matt McCusker 4:23 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 4:24 You know the, the Sahara Desert used to be a fucking rainforest?

Shane Gillis 4:27 Really?

Joe Rogan 4:27 Yeah. That's, like, the normal path of thi-... We just, we look at stuff through such a narrow window that we think, "Oh, the desert's the desert. The jungle's the jungle." But there's a natural path that goes back and forth between things becoming, like, rainforest and jungle-

Matt McCusker 4:44 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 4:44 ... and then things becoming sand.

Matt McCusker 4:46 We talking about the ice caps too? How apparently that was lush up there. Someone told me-

Joe Rogan 4:50 Oh, yeah.

Matt McCusker 4:50 ... that used to be lush forest that became a... We're in an ice age right now, technically. Is that correct?

Joe Rogan 4:55 I don't think so.

Matt McCusker 4:55 I heard if the, I heard if we have polar ice caps, that's technically an ice age, but I could be wrong.

Joe Rogan 4:59 Oh, really?

Matt McCusker 4:59 My cousin told me that.

Joe Rogan 5:00 Oh, your cousin might be on Reddit.

Shane Gillis 5:03 (laughs) His cousin is definitely on Reddit.

Matt McCusker 5:05 My cousin-

Joe Rogan 5:05 You go through our conspiracy.

Shane Gillis 5:06 Definitely on Reddit.

Matt McCusker 5:06 My, my cousin was reassuring me.

Joe Rogan 5:08 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 5:08 He's like, "Dude, the ice caps will fully melt and it'll just be lush and we'll all move up there, you know, hundreds of years."

Joe Rogan 5:13 Mm. Well, if global warming does keep accelerating, that's the, what everybo- the people that have the most optimistic view of it, they say, "All the places that are wicked cold will just move into those."

Shane Gillis 5:24 I was listening to that, that guy. He was talking about how, like, the Midwest, like Minnesota-

Joe Rogan 5:27 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 5:27 ... and shit. Like, Canada.

Matt McCusker 5:28 Yeah. Yeah, it's gonna get-

Shane Gillis 5:29 It'll be nice.

Matt McCusker 5:29 ... a lot warmer. I'm gonna re-cross the Bering Strait.

Joe Rogan 5:32 Nice.

Shane Gillis 5:32 You gotta get back.

Matt McCusker 5:33 I'm going back to Pamper.

Joe Rogan 5:33 I think it's the opposite though, 'cause it's gonna get more water.

Matt McCusker 5:36 Ah.

Joe Rogan 5:36 You're looking at it wrong.

Matt McCusker 5:37 So, I get my timeli- my time, uh, timelines for this.

Joe Rogan 5:38 If an ice age happens, then you can make that walk.

Matt McCusker 5:41 Need that (laughs) .

Shane Gillis 5:42 Yeah, that was my favorite Jones. He was like, "Fuck global warming. The ice caps are growing." And everyone was like, "Shut the fuck up." And then one quick Google, you're like, "Goddammit, he's right."

Matt McCusker 5:52 They're growing?

Shane Gillis 5:53 Antarctica is.

Matt McCusker 5:55 So, Leonardo DiCaprio-

Shane Gillis 5:56 Right?

Matt McCusker 5:56 ... is wrong?

Shane Gillis 5:56 Leonardo DiCaprio can get fucked.

Joe Rogan 5:58 He's seeing-

Matt McCusker 5:58 Talk to the scientists.

Joe Rogan 5:59 All these fucking scientists-

Matt McCusker 6:00 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 6:01 Even the scientists don't agree 'cause, like, there are, uh, there's a mass group of scientists that will tell you, and this is undeniable, that human beings have had a big impact-... on carbon emissions.

Matt McCusker 6:11 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 6:12 But you know that volcano that just erupted? Where'd that volcano just erupt?

Shane Gillis 6:16 I mean, the... Iceland had a big one.

Joe Rogan 6:17 There was a... there's one that, that just cracked.

Shane Gillis 6:20 Oh, recently?

Joe Rogan 6:21 Some guy put this... I would like to find out if this is true. Some guy put this on Twitter, that there was more CO₂ released from that one volcano erupting than everything human beings have ever done.

Shane Gillis 6:33 Really?

Joe Rogan 6:35 I don't know if it's true. Sounds amazing, though.

Matt McCusker 6:37 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 6:37 I like it.

Matt McCusker 6:37 I've heard math in the park's familiar.

Joe Rogan 6:39 Shut down some cucks with that kinda talk. (laughs)

Shane Gillis 6:40 Yeah, I like it. I'll be at the cellar, trying to dish that out. They'll be like, "W- where did you find that?" I'll be like, "Don't worry about it."

Matt McCusker 6:46 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 6:46 You see, people are... people worry about all kinds of things, but super volcanoes is what you really should worry about. They've knocked humanity down to just a few thousand people in the past.

Shane Gillis 6:54 Really?

Joe Rogan 6:55 Yeah, 70,000 years ago. We've talked about it before. It's... I think it's called the Toba. Is that what it is, the Toba volcano? It's a super volcano. I think it's in... I think it's near Indonesia. Fact-checked, volcanoes do not produce more CO₂ emissions than human activity.

Matt McCusker 7:10 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 7:10 Reuters is on your ass, dude.

Joe Rogan 7:12 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 7:12 They probably type that up in real time.

Joe Rogan 7:14 So, this was June 8th of 2022. So, this was one... They were talking... This... God, I wish I saved it. It was one of those things I was looking on Twitter. I'm like, wow, I better Google that later.

Matt McCusker 7:24 That one little burp by Mount Etna is already doing that.

Joe Rogan 7:26 But he said he was gonna release data that, that proved this.

Matt McCusker 7:29 I mean, why-

Joe Rogan 7:30 "One little burp by Mount Etna has already put more than 10 times the CO₂ in the atmosphere than mankind has in our entire time on Earth. Don't worry about a scam is in the works to tax your minuscule footprint." Oh, this is a meme that someone put out?

Shane Gillis 7:44 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 7:44 I didn't see a meme. I saw someone's tweet. They might have stole the meme and tried to be clever. Or, or the meme might have come from this guy's tweet as well. Same allegation has been shared here in 2016. An iteration posted on Twitter June 2nd has re-... tweeted nearly 9,000 times. Yeah, it might all be horseshit.

Matt McCusker 8:07 Yeah, I mean, but my thing is-

Joe Rogan 8:08 That's a lot, though. Look at all that.

Shane Gillis 8:09 That looks like a lot of stuff.

Matt McCusker 8:10 (laughs) That looks like a lot of stuff.

Joe Rogan 8:10 It's a big-ass cloud. I'd say that's 40% CO₂, if I had to put my eye on that.

Shane Gillis 8:13 Yeah, if I had to just... just one glance at it.

Matt McCusker 8:16 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 8:16 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 8:16 Well, it's just funny to be like, nah, the Earth's not warming up, you're so fu-... No, does anyone know-

Joe Rogan 8:21 No one does.

Matt McCusker 8:21 ... the temperature of the entire Earth? Both people-

Joe Rogan 8:23 Doubt it.

Matt McCusker 8:23 ... both people are silly, the people with limited research that say it's nothing to worry about, and the people with limited research that say we're gonna all... we're all gonna die.

Joe Rogan 8:32 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 8:32 Both people are silly. The, the, the ones that make the most sense to me... The, the... I had a guy named Steve Koonin on the podcast, who's a... He's a physicist who got into, uh... That's what he is, right? Koonin?

Narrator 8:43 Yes, I think so. Um-

Joe Rogan 8:45 And he, uh... I forget how he was tasked with, uh, going about, uh, looking into climate change. But what he found was that the periods of ups and downs have always existed. Like, this idea that the Earth has ever been at a stable temperature, that it stays like this, that's just not the case. It's go... it goes up and it goes down, and it seems like it's always done that forever. And it varies wildly. Like, they have these big giant spikes up and down. Uh, but this is over thousands and thousands of years.

Matt McCusker 9:19 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 9:19 Right? Maybe millions of years, where they're predicting, like, how long. But for sure, we're having an impact. But the question's like, how much impact? Like, what, what is the difference? And would it be happening anyway? Would it be warming up anyway? We... If we didn't do anything to fuck up the environment, then we could just look at the environment for what it is. We could say, "Oh, look, it looks like it's warming up." Well, we know we're not doing anything about that.

Matt McCusker 9:42 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 9:43 If we had no impact, but we know we have an impact.

Matt McCusker 9:45 Yeah, but the, the thing no one thinks about is we... we were like... we escape from nature in, like, a blind rush out of just being constantly destroyed by, like, floods and eaten by predators. And we set up this whole system so we can, like, eat and not all die.

Joe Rogan 9:58 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 9:58 And everyone's like, "Fuck this." And it's like, I mean, we can definitely tweak it to be better, but Jesus Christ, man.

Joe Rogan 10:02 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 10:03 A little bit of appreciation.

Joe Rogan 10:04 A little bit of appreciation-

Matt McCusker 10:05 I'm a classicist. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 10:05 ... for what we've done. It's, it's amazing what people have done. But yeah, for sure, we could do a lot of the shit better.

Matt McCusker 10:11 Dude, like plastic bags, you can fig-... They can figure out different technology for something that doesn't sit in the ocean for f-... you know.

Joe Rogan 10:15 Well, they can make biodegradable plastic now.

Matt McCusker 10:17 Why don't... That's my thing. Why don't they?

Joe Rogan 10:19 Yeah. Well, it's a practical one.

Matt McCusker 10:20 That's a good point.

Shane Gillis 10:20 Get to it.

Joe Rogan 10:21 Uh, plastics as, as they are now, I think most of them are just made with fossil fuels, right?

Matt McCusker 10:26 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 10:26 Most plastics? But I know they're r-... out... They're putting out, like, biodegradable plastics that are made from plant. You can actually make plastic from hemp, believe it or not.

Matt McCusker 10:36 Really?

Joe Rogan 10:37 Yeah, it was wild. I read that. I was like, "What?"

Shane Gillis 10:40 I don't like it. I gotta bring my own bags to my grocery store, and I forget them every time.

Joe Rogan 10:43 Ah.

Shane Gillis 10:44 So then I buy one.

Matt McCusker 10:46 Mm.

Shane Gillis 10:46 Now I've got a whole fu-... I got piles of bags in my apartment.

Matt McCusker 10:48 Get a stick. Get a stick with a bandana.

Narrator 10:51 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 10:51 I might, dude.

Matt McCusker 10:51 All your groceries. (laughs)

Shane Gillis 10:52 Get some beans, dude.

Joe Rogan 10:53 It is a good move.

Shane Gillis 10:54 Send my girlfriend out for beans.

Narrator 10:55 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 10:55 It is a good move that they just don't just give away bags anymore. Like, even though it's real convenient, it's, it's probably better if you bring a bag.

Shane Gillis 11:04 It is.

Matt McCusker 11:04 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 11:04 You know?

Shane Gillis 11:05 But who's gonna remember that?

Joe Rogan 11:06 Nobody.

Narrator 11:08 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 11:08 I walk outside my front door and go, "Fuck, I forgot a bag."

Joe Rogan 11:10 But isn't, isn't that a thing we could adjust to?

Shane Gillis 11:13 I feel like I'm locking it. We'll adjust to it, yeah.

Joe Rogan 11:15 Yeah. It depends on if you're a walking apartment person-

Shane Gillis 11:17 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 11:17 ... versus someone who drives.

Shane Gillis 11:19 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 11:19 Like, if you're driving to the supermarket, it makes sense, just leave a bag in your trunk.

Shane Gillis 11:23 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 11:23 But if you're a walking person in an apartment, and you're in the city, and you forget a bag, that's annoying.

Matt McCusker 11:29 We'll just do paper bags and burn them.

Joe Rogan 11:32 Yeah, but then you kill trees.

Shane Gillis 11:33 I'm serious, dude. What about the emissions?

Narrator 11:34 No, they disappear.

Joe Rogan 11:34 What about the emissions, bro?

Matt McCusker 11:35 It goes up in the air. (laughs)

Shane Gillis 11:36 Oh, it goes away? (laughs)

Narrator 11:37 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 11:37 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 11:37 It goes straight through space. Goes out into space.

Narrator 11:41 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 11:41 I don't know what these fucking pussies are talking about, dude.

Narrator 11:43 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 11:43 (laughs)

Narrator 11:43 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 11:43 Global warming is fucking not real. I'm sick of it.

Narrator 11:46 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 11:47 I had Randall Carlson on my podcast. He's an expert in, uh, collisions, like, uh, cosmic collisions on Earth.

Shane Gillis 11:54 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 11:54 And, uh, he said, "You don't..." He goes, "Global warming is not good." He goes, "But what's really bad is global cooling."

Shane Gillis 12:00 Oh.

Joe Rogan 12:01 He goes, "Global cooling is terrifying." Global co-... Ice ages? That's where everybody dies.

Shane Gillis 12:06 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 12:06 That's where there's no food. That's where you're, you're fucking starving to death.

Matt McCusker 12:10 ... dude, how did we make it?

Shane Gillis 12:12 (blowing raspberry)

Matt McCusker 12:12 How did we make it through the Ice Age? How do we-

Joe Rogan 12:14 Well, you have to move.

Matt McCusker 12:16 How did we-

Joe Rogan 12:16 You, you moved, you know.

Matt McCusker 12:18 Oh, okay.

Joe Rogan 12:18 Or the heartiest of hearty people, they hunted and gathered, like the Inuit. They're, they, they basically can't grow any vegetables.

Shane Gillis 12:27 What a fucking bullshit life.

Joe Rogan 12:29 What a scary life, dude.

Shane Gillis 12:30 In a fucking ice cave, just-

Joe Rogan 12:31 You're living in an ice house, covered in animal skins.

Shane Gillis 12:34 Hopefully you stab something in the next month, you could eat it.

Joe Rogan 12:36 And you're just looking for fat.

Shane Gillis 12:37 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 12:37 You're just looking for blubber to eat.

Matt McCusker 12:39 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 12:39 'Cause that's what your body uses for fuel.

Matt McCusker 12:42 Even im- imagine how much you could just, like, slide on ice, though.

Shane Gillis 12:45 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 12:45 Probably a lot of sliding. That's probably true.

Matt McCusker 12:47 (laughs) You'd be fucking in there.

Joe Rogan 12:48 You'd be fucking nasty, dude.

Matt McCusker 12:48 (laughs) Oh, they're probably getting- all the layers-

Joe Rogan 12:52 On animal skins?

Matt McCusker 12:52 ... get in there together.

Joe Rogan 12:53 Imagine fucking-

Matt McCusker 12:54 Get your snuggle.

Joe Rogan 12:54 ... in an ice house that you made with a fire in the scent of it-

Matt McCusker 12:57 (sighs)

Joe Rogan 12:57 ... in the center of it o- on animal skins of animals you killed, knowing that there's no doctors anywhere. So if-

Shane Gillis 13:05 (exhales) .

Joe Rogan 13:05 ... if your woman gets pregnant, like, you're just, you're pulling it out of there in the middle of the tundra with polar bears around your ice house.

Matt McCusker 13:13 (gasps) Yeah, it's fucking crazy.

Shane Gillis 13:14 Yeah, but they probably, they had no concept of doctors.

Joe Rogan 13:17 They had no concept of any other life. I mean, of course there were, of course there were-

Shane Gillis 13:19 I mean, of course there were, of course there were-

Matt McCusker 13:19 Medicine men?

Shane Gillis 13:19 ... people that figured shit out.

Joe Rogan 13:21 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 13:21 But I'm saying, like, he wasn't like, "Fuck, I wish I had a doctor."

Joe Rogan 13:24 Dude, if you grow up like that, that's how you live.

Shane Gillis 13:27 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 13:27 And people are-

Matt McCusker 13:27 True.

Joe Rogan 13:28 ... adaptable as shit. I had this dude on, uh, Sunny from Best Ever Food Review yesterday, and he went and lived with these tribal people and hunted with them and, and ate what they ate. He, he reviews, like, exotic foods from all over the world. And, like, he's like, with these tribal people, slurping blood out of the carcass of a goat that they just shot. They're, they're slurping it up with their hands.

Matt McCusker 13:51 (gasps)

Joe Rogan 13:51 And you can tell he's, like, barely getting through it on camera.

Shane Gillis 13:54 Yeah (laughs) .

Joe Rogan 13:54 But it's like, that's their normal life. For them, it wasn't gross at all. It was totally normal. This is how you get food.

Shane Gillis 14:01 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 14:01 You know, you don't wet, let the blood go to waste. You slurp it out of the body cavity.

Matt McCusker 14:06 God damn.

Narrator 14:06 I love looking at this page.

Matt McCusker 14:08 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 14:08 The Neanderthals' healthcare skills-

Matt McCusker 14:10 That's gross.

Joe Rogan 14:10 ... helped them survive through the Ice Age. What?

Shane Gillis 14:13 Bam, thank you.

Joe Rogan 14:13 It's a, a debate to just-

Matt McCusker 14:14 Is that a trap?

Narrator 14:14 No, they said, like-

Joe Rogan 14:15 (laughs)

Narrator 14:15 ... they found people with broken bones and not sure exactly how it did it. But-

Joe Rogan 14:18 Mm-hmm.

Narrator 14:18 ... uh, if the, since they were in such small tribes, if they lost someone, it would've been catastrophic to the group. So they all had-

Matt McCusker 14:23 Damn.

Narrator 14:23 ... to work to keep everybody alive close to it too.

Matt McCusker 14:25 Dude.

Joe Rogan 14:26 Yeah, I mean, they probably eventually figured out how to set an arm, right, and put a stick there and tr- tie it down.

Shane Gillis 14:32 (laughs) Have arms, they're just sitting in a fucking igloo. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 14:35 Yeah. And bro, they don't always grow back good. You know, there's a lot of like, uh-

Shane Gillis 14:39 Yeah, you get some mangled arms, dude.

Joe Rogan 14:41 Yeah. Well, there's a lot of, like, bones they found of people. That, like, that's a hard life to have.

Shane Gillis 14:45 Oh, and then monsters, like tigers.

Joe Rogan 14:47 Oh, jeez, you're getting shit bit off all the time.

Matt McCusker 14:50 I'm thinking more about your cave wife.

Joe Rogan 14:52 Yeah, what kind of wife do you want?

Matt McCusker 14:52 Before women had words and they would get home and they'd just be like (growls) . And you'd be like, ugh.

Shane Gillis 14:56 No words, just ...

Joe Rogan 14:56 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 14:56 No, just no words.

Shane Gillis 14:58 And you'd got to be like, uh.

Joe Rogan 15:01 Uh (growls) .

Shane Gillis 15:01 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 15:02 I bet they were horny all the time. I bet all they did was just fuck, just fuck and throw spears and go gather food.

Matt McCusker 15:10 Yeah, they probably, yeah, right.

Shane Gillis 15:10 Yeah, the more we're talking about it, the more I'm coming around on this.

Joe Rogan 15:12 Yeah, because-

Shane Gillis 15:13 How sick that shit would've been, dude.

Matt McCusker 15:14 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 15:14 They, they, they must be so primal, those people.

Shane Gillis 15:17 You don't know where the fuck you are.

Joe Rogan 15:18 Like the earliest early people.

Matt McCusker 15:20 Yeah, you're just gonna die.

Joe Rogan 15:20 Like, people from, like, 300,000 years ago, whatever a person was back then, they must be so horny.

Matt McCusker 15:26 Yeah, well, that's why they had all this-

Joe Rogan 15:26 Hairy and shit, just (growls) .

Matt McCusker 15:28 Just, yeah.

Joe Rogan 15:29 Looking to fuck and throw spears and-

Matt McCusker 15:31 Smelling each other.

Joe Rogan 15:31 ... fighting off animals.

Matt McCusker 15:33 Well, that's why they had all those fucked up rituals, 'cause they, in their world, nature, like violence, they just, like, put on a pedestal.

Joe Rogan 15:38 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 15:38 That was like the coolest thing. That was like the ultimate life force back then, just getting squashed by, like, animals and rocks. They would reenact it all the time.

Joe Rogan 15:45 Could you imagine if you can go back and get, like, one of them Neanderthal dudes and, like, enter him into a wrestling tournament?

Matt McCusker 15:50 It's-

Joe Rogan 15:51 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 15:52 Right.

Joe Rogan 15:52 I'll just teach him a few moves.

Shane Gillis 15:53 He'd bite, he'd bite right away.

Joe Rogan 15:54 He'd bite immediately. (laughs)

Shane Gillis 15:56 He'd bite (laughs) . First guy to grab, he'd be like...

Joe Rogan 16:00 Ugh, ugh, ugh.

Shane Gillis 16:00 He would just feast.

Joe Rogan 16:01 But like a Neanderthal is probably so much stronger than people. Their bones are different. They're built different. They're like 5'7", 200-plus pounds. They're, they're built like chimps.

Matt McCusker 16:12 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 16:13 Like big powerful chimps.

Matt McCusker 16:14 Ugh.

Shane Gillis 16:15 You'd have to put them down, dude. You can't have them out here.

Joe Rogan 16:17 Do you think that they fucked us or we fucked them?

Matt McCusker 16:21 (inhales) We seduced them.

Joe Rogan 16:22 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 16:22 I think we seduced them, for sure.

Shane Gillis 16:25 Yes.

Joe Rogan 16:25 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 16:25 Imagine you'd be laying, laying in wait, dude.

Shane Gillis 16:28 One of those guys came by.

Joe Rogan 16:29 Plus, back then-

Matt McCusker 16:31 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 16:31 ... like, having a p- a powerful woman would be very attractive 'cause then you'd have kids that could survive.

Matt McCusker 16:37 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 16:37 Like, your, your gene pool, your gene line would keep going on.

Shane Gillis 16:40 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 16:40 Going for Chyna.

Joe Rogan 16:41 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 16:41 You want one night in Chyna.

Joe Rogan 16:43 Ugh.

Shane Gillis 16:43 You don't want Chyna the wrestler.

Joe Rogan 16:45 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 16:45 You want a bulky-ass bitch, dude.

Joe Rogan 16:47 One Night in China.

Matt McCusker 16:48 She was probably the hottest, dude.

Shane Gillis 16:49 Chyna would've been a...

Joe Rogan 16:50 Dude, I did, uh, Fear Factor with Chyna.

Shane Gillis 16:52 Xena.

Joe Rogan 16:52 And after she'd won, when after she completed one of the stunts, she got out in like full flex and goes, "Who's the man?"

Matt McCusker 17:00 Oh.

Joe Rogan 17:00 She said, "Who's the man?"

Shane Gillis 17:01 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 17:02 I guess it's just what you say.

Matt McCusker 17:04 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 17:04 She had a wild voice.

Joe Rogan 17:05 Tsh, big lady.

Shane Gillis 17:06 She did.

Matt McCusker 17:07 How tall was she?

Joe Rogan 17:09 Oh.

Shane Gillis 17:09 I don't know. But when women take steroids like that-

Joe Rogan 17:12 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 17:12 ... they develop a, a male midget's voice.

Joe Rogan 17:15 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 17:16 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 17:16 She was like, "Who's the man?"

Shane Gillis 17:18 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 17:18 Shut, didn't X-Pac take her down?

Shane Gillis 17:20 Uh, you shouldn't say midget, so.

Joe Rogan 17:21 Yeah, look at this.

Matt McCusker 17:22 Midge.

Joe Rogan 17:23 Coolio was on it.

Shane Gillis 17:24 Nice.

Joe Rogan 17:24 Coolio won it.

Matt McCusker 17:25 Damn.

Shane Gillis 17:26 Ruggies, ruggies.

Joe Rogan 17:28 There she is.

Matt McCusker 17:28 Damn, dude.

Shane Gillis 17:29 Dude.

Joe Rogan 17:29 Hasselhoff.

Matt McCusker 17:30 Hasselhoff.

Joe Rogan 17:30 The thing, the thing that sucks-

Matt McCusker 17:31 I was thinking about it.

Shane Gillis 17:32 Dude, this squad is nuts, dude. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 17:34 The thing that's so...

Shane Gillis 17:35 Coolio, Hasselhoff. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 17:36 Yeah, you know, three of them are dead.

Matt McCusker 17:38 Yeah, dude.

Joe Rogan 17:39 Three of those people on that show are dead.

Shane Gillis 17:39 That might be a cursed episode, dude.

Joe Rogan 17:41 Oh my God.

Shane Gillis 17:41 Maybe.

Joe Rogan 17:42 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 17:42 What did Chyna die of?

Joe Rogan 17:43 Kelly Preston died, uh, Chyna died, and Coolio died.

Matt McCusker 17:49 What, what did, what took Chyna out?

Joe Rogan 17:50 That's a good question. I don't know.

Matt McCusker 17:52 Pile driver.

Joe Rogan 17:53 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 17:55 Kane broke into her house.

Joe Rogan 17:56 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 17:56 She did porn for a while.

Joe Rogan 17:58 Oh, yeah.

Shane Gillis 17:58 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 17:58 It was the One Night in Chyna, that was her porn.

Joe Rogan 18:00 Oh, that was the name of it.

Matt McCusker 18:01 Wasn't, didn't, wasn't it X-Pac who was, I think X-Pac was doing something-

Shane Gillis 18:03 You fucking love X-Pac. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 18:04 Dude. Who's X-Pac?

Matt McCusker 18:06 The wrestler. D-Generation X, the one who sucked it.

Shane Gillis 18:08 This is like my favorite story of-

Matt McCusker 18:09 It's bull- it's true.

Shane Gillis 18:10 Matt told me this story. He was like, "Dude, I saw X-Pac once. He was in an airport."

Joe Rogan 18:14 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 18:14 Dude, I wa- I was like 12.

Shane Gillis 18:15 I was standing there. I was like, "Yo, X-Pac, what's up?"

Matt McCusker 18:17 I was 12. I gave him the suck- like, "X-Pac," I gave him the suck it and he just-

Shane Gillis 18:19 He goes, he didn't even look at me.I was like, "Dude, every dude looks like X-Pac."

Joe Rogan 18:23 He didn't even look at you?

Shane Gillis 18:24 No, it wasn't him.

18:24 Yeah, a lot of dudes look like X-Pac.

Joe Rogan 18:25 What?

Shane Gillis 18:25 That's... He saw a guy that looked like that at the airport-

18:27 Yeah, you would be-

18:28 ... and was like, "X-Pac."

Joe Rogan 18:28 I saw a guy-

Shane Gillis 18:29 You would be de- I know five guys who look like that.

18:31 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 18:31 Every dude looks like this.

Shane Gillis 18:32 Just from jujitsu class.

Joe Rogan 18:34 (laughs) You know, I was 12, he had a cut- Bro. ... sleeve denim vest.

Shane Gillis 18:37 Every gas station.

Joe Rogan 18:38 And the logo was Pac. (laughs)

Shane Gillis 18:38 If you live in a Mexican neighborhood you see that dude every day.

Joe Rogan 18:42 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 18:42 You see that dude every day.

Narrator 18:44 There he is. One, two, three.

Joe Rogan 18:45 Young Pac.

Shane Gillis 18:46 Oh, that one was when he was young, huh?

18:46 X-Pac does rule though. The, the Bronco Buster?

Joe Rogan 18:49 Oh, man.

Shane Gillis 18:49 I did not think it was gay.

Joe Rogan 18:50 Not at all.

Shane Gillis 18:51 (laughs)

18:51 There was not one part of me that thought it was gay.

Joe Rogan 18:52 What's the Bronco Buster?

Shane Gillis 18:53 Uh...

18:53 A guy gets put in the turnbuckle and he's, like, sitting.

Joe Rogan 18:56 Uh-huh.

Shane Gillis 18:56 And X-Pac jumps and puts his dick in his face.

Joe Rogan 18:59 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 19:00 That's it. That's his closer. It's over.

Joe Rogan 19:01 That's a good closer.

Shane Gillis 19:01 (laughs)

19:02 It is pretty sick.

Joe Rogan 19:02 That's pretty solid.

Shane Gillis 19:02 And then he gets up and says, "Suck my dick."

Joe Rogan 19:04 That's amazing. (laughs)

Shane Gillis 19:05 (laughs) Yeah.

Joe Rogan 19:06 So this is what he does?

Shane Gillis 19:06 There it is. There it is, dude.

Joe Rogan 19:07 He's getting ready.

Shane Gillis 19:08 (gasps) Actually-

Joe Rogan 19:09 Eh, this guy's got his girl sitting on his, uh, his lap. And she's nodding like, "Yeah, fuck his face."

Shane Gillis 19:14 He's gonna-

Joe Rogan 19:15 Here it goes.

Shane Gillis 19:15 ... assault this man.

Joe Rogan 19:16 Fuck, dude.

Shane Gillis 19:17 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 19:17 This was the Ice Age.

Shane Gillis 19:18 Oh, my god. This was the Ice Age.

Joe Rogan 19:19 That... That is insane.

Shane Gillis 19:20 Suck it. (laughs) Suck it.

19:21 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 19:21 That is insane. That's his finishing move?

Shane Gillis 19:24 See if Triple H is like-

Joe Rogan 19:25 Imagine your finishing move.

Shane Gillis 19:27 (laughs)

19:27 Hell, yeah.

Joe Rogan 19:27 Imagine pitching that-

Shane Gillis 19:28 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 19:28 ... in a meeting. "Vince, here's my plan. I'm gonna lay a dude against the turnbuckle and I'm gonna fuck his face."

Shane Gillis 19:35 (laughs)

19:35 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 19:35 "And then I'm gonna do like this here. Suck it."

Shane Gillis 19:38 Genius.

Joe Rogan 19:40 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 19:40 X-Pac, you've done it again.

Joe Rogan 19:40 Hey, what do you... What do you... Uh, what do you think about the Saudis buying the W- WWE? The rumor, the unsubstantiated rumor-

Shane Gillis 19:47 I've heard it.

Joe Rogan 19:47 ... that the Saudis are buying WWE.

Shane Gillis 19:48 You met Lemaire. He's, he's an autistic man. He loves WWE.

Joe Rogan 19:52 Oh.

Shane Gillis 19:52 And he's, he's not happy about it.

Joe Rogan 19:54 Yeah, he was very mad last night in the green room.

Shane Gillis 19:57 He's upset.

19:57 Why?

Joe Rogan 19:57 W- all him and Tony would do is talk about it last night in the green room.

Shane Gillis 20:00 Oh, Tony likes wrestling.

Joe Rogan 20:00 Dude, they were very upset.

Shane Gillis 20:01 Are they gonna let, like, the wrestlers hit women and shit?

20:03 Well, that's the thing. They're saying that they might not... Their conspiracy is no women.

Joe Rogan 20:08 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 20:08 (laughs)

20:08 They're gonna be able to bulldog all of 'em.

20:09 (laughs)

20:10 It's gonna be Attitude Era again.

Joe Rogan 20:11 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 20:11 Just be pulling women out of cars.

20:13 Dude, they're gonna 3D May off the fucking jumbotron. Remember when they did that?

20:17 (laughs)

20:17 There was an old woman-

Joe Rogan 20:17 They're gonna bring him in to do that on chicks.

Shane Gillis 20:19 There was an old woman in the WWF, and they... These two dudes... You remember the Dudley? Wasn't it the Dudley ones?

20:24 Dudley Twins, yeah.

20:25 Dude, they tossed-

Joe Rogan 20:26 Dudley Brothers.

Shane Gillis 20:26 ... like, a 80-year-old woman off the... Jamie.

Narrator 20:29 I'm go... I'm, like, on lock-down.

Shane Gillis 20:30 Jamie (laughs) .

20:30 What did they do?

Joe Rogan 20:31 That'd be sick as hell, man.

Shane Gillis 20:32 Tossed her off the turnbuckle?

20:32 You'll see.

Narrator 20:33 I don't know.

Shane Gillis 20:34 No.

20:34 This is Saudi Arabia. Saudi Arabia saw this and was like, "We're in. We're very interested."

20:38 Oh, no.

Joe Rogan 20:38 So this is the... She's got a neck brace on?

Narrator 20:40 Mm-hmm.

Shane Gillis 20:41 (laughs)

Narrator 20:41 This is a long bit, so I'll kind of zoom ahead, but...

Shane Gillis 20:44 There's Lemaire.

Narrator 20:45 There's a match.

Shane Gillis 20:46 Yes.

Narrator 20:46 They brought her out. So she's standing up there watching.

Joe Rogan 20:48 Oh, my god.

Narrator 20:50 And-

Joe Rogan 20:51 And she's yelling and screaming.

Shane Gillis 20:53 Mark Henry, sexual assault.

Joe Rogan 20:54 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 20:54 (laughs)

Narrator 20:54 And so they roll her-

Joe Rogan 20:56 And we all get back up.

Narrator 20:57 It's...

Shane Gillis 20:57 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 20:57 The Dudley Boys.

Shane Gillis 20:58 The Dudley Boys are so nice.

Joe Rogan 20:59 Oh, Bubba Ray Dudley.

Narrator 21:00 So granted, they're... Uh, I thought they-

Joe Rogan 21:02 What are they gonna do to this old lady?

Shane Gillis 21:04 I think he's trying to powerbomb her.

21:05 (laughs)

Narrator 21:05 Oh, yeah.

Shane Gillis 21:06 Oh, he's trying to push her down the ramp?

Narrator 21:08 Oh, no. What was he doing? D'Lo was gonna run May right off the... Crowd, the crowd's pissed.

Joe Rogan 21:13 Oh, no, dude.

Shane Gillis 21:14 They want it.

Joe Rogan 21:14 But I wouldn't do that.

Shane Gillis 21:16 (laughs)

21:16 This is blood, dude. Dude, this is the arena. Spill her blood.

21:19 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 21:20 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 21:20 This is a mob.

Joe Rogan 21:20 Hilarious.

Shane Gillis 21:21 The mob.

21:21 Feeder to the lions.

Joe Rogan 21:23 This is actually great. This is a great idea. This is funny.

Narrator 21:27 They got her up. She may very well be able to stand.

Shane Gillis 21:28 He says, "Uh, you'll see."

21:29 (laughs)

Narrator 21:29 She's really not that funny. (laughs) That's enough! No! For God's sake, no!

Joe Rogan 21:31 Everyone's thought about doing this.

Narrator 21:34 No! No! Oh, god! (laughs)

Joe Rogan 21:38 What the fuck, man? What the fuck?

Shane Gillis 21:41 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 21:42 He just did a lateral drop on a table.

Shane Gillis 21:45 Dude, powerbombing your grandma.

Joe Rogan 21:47 Who did that... W- what do they call that? What do they call that?

Shane Gillis 21:47 That's a powerbomb.

21:48 That's a powerbomb, dude. That was a powerbomb through a table. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 21:50 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 21:50 Dude, the fact that your brain carried this for-

21:53 (laughs)

21:53 ... 22 years. This has been in your brain for 22 years.

Joe Rogan 21:56 Bro, what kind of-

Shane Gillis 21:57 It happened.

Joe Rogan 21:57 ... damage did it do to that lady's brains?

Shane Gillis 21:58 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 21:59 I mean, I don't care what you say.

Shane Gillis 22:01 (laughs)

22:02 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 22:02 That lady... That lady got impact from that.

Shane Gillis 22:04 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 22:04 There was some impact involved in that.

Shane Gillis 22:07 Damn. I wonder if there was, like, a nursing home pipeline to the WWE.

22:10 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 22:10 He's not... Like, she's not protected there. Look at her hands.

Shane Gillis 22:12 She's older than she looks. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 22:12 That's a real old lady. Bro, that probably took memories from her.

Shane Gillis 22:16 You talking shit? Oh, no, it's Mark Henry saying, "I love you."

Narrator 22:18 Probably like, "Are you okay? (laughs) Are you dead?"

Joe Rogan 22:20 Dude.

Shane Gillis 22:21 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 22:21 They killed an old lady?

Shane Gillis 22:22 Jesus Christ. Okay.

22:24 That's fun.

22:24 He's rubbing his head. He's like, "I'm gonna get this pinned on me." Fuck. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 22:28 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 22:28 (laughs)

22:28 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 22:28 What the fuck, man?

Shane Gillis 22:30 "I'm getting arrested."

22:31 Man.

22:31 (laughs) Damn, dude.

22:33 So yeah, they used to... WWE is not afraid to put hands on women, dude.

Joe Rogan 22:36 It's coming back. It's coming back.

Shane Gillis 22:37 Now it... They did get away from it. Now with the Saudis, we might be back to the classics.

22:42 (laughs)

22:42 Putting gye... (laughs) Putting geezers through tables is fucking crazy.

Joe Rogan 22:47 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 22:47 (laughs)

22:47 That was probably in, like, Rochester, New York. "Rochester, are you ready for RAW?"

Narrator 22:51 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 22:52 Fuck, yeah.

Shane Gillis 22:53 Oh.

Joe Rogan 22:54 Oh, my god, that's so nuts.

Shane Gillis 22:55 Happy for you.

22:56 You ever go to one of those? A wrestling-

Joe Rogan 22:57 No. Tony's been trying to get me to go to WrestleMania-

Shane Gillis 23:00 It's so fucking fun, dude.

Joe Rogan 23:00 ... forever.

Shane Gillis 23:00 It's so fun.

Joe Rogan 23:01 Forev... But now that the Saudis bought it- allegedly.

Shane Gillis 23:05 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 23:05 Is that real? What's the... What's the-

Narrator 23:06 No, not yet.

Joe Rogan 23:07 Still not real?

Shane Gillis 23:08 Damn.

Joe Rogan 23:08 We... Did we Snopes that yesterday?

Narrator 23:10 They were looking. They were still investigating it.

Shane Gillis 23:12 It's gonna be cool.

Joe Rogan 23:13 Mmm.

Shane Gillis 23:13 If the Saudis get it, there's a chance it gets better.

23:15 Who owns it? Does Vince McMahon still own it now or is he focusing on this?

Joe Rogan 23:17 Well, they kicked him out 'cause he got busted with a bunch of floozies.

Shane Gillis 23:20 Yeah, yeah. He's-

Joe Rogan 23:21 What? ... paying a bunch of ladies with-

Shane Gillis 23:22 Who would-

Joe Rogan 23:22 ... company, company cash or something.

Shane Gillis 23:24 Who would've thought all that money went to that?

Joe Rogan 23:26 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 23:26 (laughs)

23:27 Gotta keep people... Look, if you look like that and you're 70 years old and you're the head of the WWE, you're slinging dick.

23:33 Yeah, I'm sure he's slinging dick.

23:33 What do you want him to do?

Joe Rogan 23:34 What do you want him to do? I'd be more disappointed if he wasn't slinging dick.

Shane Gillis 23:37 Yeah, dude.

23:37 If, if he was a faithful-

Joe Rogan 23:39 Because Vince McMahon-

Shane Gillis 23:39 ... married man.

23:40 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 23:40 He's a gigantic barbarian man who's, like, 79 years old.

Shane Gillis 23:43 Yeah, he's awesome.

Joe Rogan 23:43 He works out with a chain around his neck. You ever see how jacked he is?

Shane Gillis 23:47 Yeah, he's fucking ridiculous.

23:48 Yeah, he... Yeah. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 23:48 Show me a picture of, uh-

Shane Gillis 23:50 He hogs.

Joe Rogan 23:50 ... Vince McMahon jacked. No, still jacked.

Shane Gillis 23:52 No, I watched him get stunnered at WrestleMania.

Joe Rogan 23:54 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 23:54 It's tough, dude.

23:55 (laughs) You see the-

23:56 Lemaire got me.

23:58 (laughs)

23:58 Uh, Lemaire was hanging out with me and he was like, "It's WrestleMania today." And I was like, "I don't give a fuck." And then he started, like, putting up old highlights-

Joe Rogan 24:04 Ah.

Shane Gillis 24:04 ... to get pumped for the thing.

Joe Rogan 24:06 Dude.

Narrator 24:06 It is brutal.

Shane Gillis 24:06 I used to love Stone Cold.

Narrator 24:08 Oh, my bad.

Shane Gillis 24:09 It was...

24:10 Look, dude. Look at that.

Joe Rogan 24:11 Uh, dude, he's super-

Shane Gillis 24:12 No, obviously.

Joe Rogan 24:13 ... jacked and he's 150,000 years old.

Shane Gillis 24:14 That's from the front, dude. See him from the side. He's got the fucking...

Joe Rogan 24:18 What has he got?

Shane Gillis 24:19 He's hunched, dude.

24:20 Oh, my god, dude.

24:22 So, that's pretty new. So, that's what's him and McAfee doing. Let him do his thing.

24:25 Obviously, I'm not truly criticizing-

24:28 I know, I know, yeah. Of course not, of course not.

24:28 ... but when he got stunned.

24:30 I'm talking about having s- I haven't talked about his extramarital affairs.

24:33 Oh.

Joe Rogan 24:34 You're giving him a hard time about his physique, Shane, really?

Shane Gillis 24:37 Joe?

24:37 No, I thought-

24:38 That sounds kind of personal.

24:39 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 24:40 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 24:40 I'm, uh, I'm stunned.

24:42 Yeah, he got stunned.

24:43 I mean, he looks good. (laughs)

24:45 (laughs) He looks good. He's... I think he's 80-something years old.

24:48 Well, that's incredible.

24:49 He looks better than Schwarzenegger.

Joe Rogan 24:50 How old is he?

Shane Gillis 24:51 Uh, shit.

Joe Rogan 24:53 Uh, let's guess.

Shane Gillis 24:55 77.

Joe Rogan 24:55 I say he's-

Shane Gillis 24:56 No, you just saw that.

Joe Rogan 24:57 I didn't see it.

Shane Gillis 24:58 Did it come up?

24:58 Yeah, yeah.

Joe Rogan 24:59 I didn't see it.

Shane Gillis 24:59 I didn't see it.

Joe Rogan 25:00 I say he's 80 years old.

Shane Gillis 25:01 Review the tape. I didn't even see it.

25:02 Yeah, what's, what's the, what's the... Scott, you're saying he d- you said he-

Joe Rogan 25:05 He said he looks like shit.

Shane Gillis 25:06 No he was... 'Cause back, like, 10 years ago, he was like-

Joe Rogan 25:08 Yeah, he was young, yeah.

Shane Gillis 25:09 ... yo, the cover of fucking Men's Health.

Joe Rogan 25:11 Back when he was 70.

Shane Gillis 25:12 Back when he was 70.

25:12 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 25:13 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 25:13 And I thought that was gonna be the same guy that came out in WrestleMania. And now you can see it's age... You can see it's wearing on him.

Joe Rogan 25:18 Let me see.

Shane Gillis 25:18 Yeah.

25:19 He got stunned and it was... He c- couldn't even-

25:21 (laughs) You're saying he hasn't recovered from the stunner?

25:22 So, what's his age? He did... He got stunned and couldn't go down.

25:24 He hated Stone Cold, bro. Here's the match. Stone Cold stole his youth.

Joe Rogan 25:27 But Jamie, how old is he?

Shane Gillis 25:28 Fuck.

25:29 77. He had it right.

Joe Rogan 25:30 How old is it?

Shane Gillis 25:30 Fuck.

25:30 77.

Joe Rogan 25:31 77?

Shane Gillis 25:32 Yes, he looks great.

Joe Rogan 25:33 Bro, he looks fucking great for 77. 77, you're supposed to be a dead man. You're not supposed to be pro wrestling.

Shane Gillis 25:39 (laughs) He would whoop my ass. Obviously-

Joe Rogan 25:40 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 25:40 ... he would beat my ass, dude.

Joe Rogan 25:42 He's-

Shane Gillis 25:42 He'd slap me.

Joe Rogan 25:42 Bro, he's older than my mom. Look at this. Boom.

Shane Gillis 25:46 Jesus.

Joe Rogan 25:47 Not a lot of fucking hip behind that.

Shane Gillis 25:49 No, not much going on.

Joe Rogan 25:50 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 25:51 I'm telling you.

Joe Rogan 25:51 Oh, he threw him into the turnbuckle. Pat McAfee goes down.

Shane Gillis 25:55 McAfee goes hard on this.

25:56 He's a nice... He sells it very well for them.

Joe Rogan 25:58 What are you saying? This isn't real?

Shane Gillis 25:59 No, no, no, no.

Joe Rogan 26:01 What the fuck are you saying, Jamie?

Shane Gillis 26:02 (laughs)

26:03 His b-... When we saw him, he was in a neck brace. He'd just gotten thrown through a table.

Joe Rogan 26:07 McAfee?

Shane Gillis 26:08 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 26:09 Yeah, don't do that, kids. Those guys get busted up more than anybody. When I've had those pro wrestlers in here-

Shane Gillis 26:14 Oh, God. Yeah.

Joe Rogan 26:14 ... like Diamond Dallas Page, his, his body had been through fucking hell.

Shane Gillis 26:19 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 26:19 That's why he invented that yoga. He's got his own yoga system, and he's, like, helped all these wrestlers that are all fucked up completely rehabilitate their body and get their motion back.

Shane Gillis 26:30 Yeah.

26:30 Damn.

Joe Rogan 26:31 Yeah, it's like a, like a hardcore yoga. The dude's in incredible shape, man.

Shane Gillis 26:36 I haven't seen him.

26:36 DDP.

Joe Rogan 26:36 He can stand up, grab his foot and do a split.

Shane Gillis 26:39 I remember DDP, he ruled. He was-

Joe Rogan 26:40 And he's in his 60s.

Shane Gillis 26:41 What?

Joe Rogan 26:42 He can grab his foot, standing up-

Shane Gillis 26:43 Standing?

Joe Rogan 26:43 ... right now, no warmup. And he holds it up, like in a split.

Shane Gillis 26:47 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 26:47 I'm not bullshitting.

Shane Gillis 26:47 Really?

Joe Rogan 26:48 Yeah, he did it in my studio.

Shane Gillis 26:49 That's weird.

Joe Rogan 26:50 I was like, "That's insane." (laughs)

Shane Gillis 26:51 Yeah, it's weird.

Joe Rogan 26:52 He was showing me some of his exercises.

Shane Gillis 26:53 I was like, "Oh, my bad," and be like... I'd be like, "What the fuck, dad?"

Joe Rogan 26:55 Guy's in amazing shape. And it's... his back is fucked. It... Like, technically, he should need surgery.

Shane Gillis 27:01 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 27:01 Like it's all bone on bone and shit, but he does that yoga routine every day, and it keeps him healthy and mobile and just not in pain. The guy... It's incred-... He's so flexible. It's like, "How did you do this?" When you see him, like, move around, you're like, "You were a pro wrestler." And look at you.

Shane Gillis 27:17 Yeah, he hit Beetlejuice with a guitar.

27:18 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 27:18 Did he? Beetlejuice from the Howard Stern Show?

Shane Gillis 27:21 Yeah. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 27:21 He hit him with a guitar?

Shane Gillis 27:22 He smashed him with a guitar.

27:23 No.

27:24 Now, he's doing yoga.

Joe Rogan 27:25 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 27:25 (laughs)

27:25 What a world.

27:26 Oh my God. I guess if you dedicated every day to yoga, you'd probably get... Probably help your body.

Joe Rogan 27:31 I think those guys, if you're that busted up, you kind of have to do something-

Shane Gillis 27:34 Yeah, those guys are fucked.

Joe Rogan 27:35 ... every day.

Shane Gillis 27:35 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 27:35 Other- otherwise, you're not gonna be mobile. Like, you really have to fix what i-... If you just start eating pain pills, which a lot of them do-

Shane Gillis 27:43 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 27:43 ... that's a, that's a dark road. And that, that's being... You gotta think about how many times a year those guys were on the road.

Shane Gillis 27:49 Ugh.

Joe Rogan 27:49 You know, I talked to Jake The Snake, and he was explaining, like, his, uh, evolution in the game, and how long it took him, and all the road gigs and shit.

Shane Gillis 27:57 Oh.

Joe Rogan 27:57 And he's like, "Dude, those guys were doing 300 nights a year."

Shane Gillis 28:01 Yeah, every day.

28:01 Oh.

28:02 Never home.

Joe Rogan 28:02 Every day, they're smashing into each other and slamming each other and fucking... And some of them, they don't like each other, so they wind-

Shane Gillis 28:10 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 28:10 ... up hitting each other hard. Look-

Shane Gillis 28:12 I can only imagine the feuds going... Like, the real feuds going on.

Joe Rogan 28:15 Oh, dude.

Shane Gillis 28:16 I was just talking to somebody about it.

Joe Rogan 28:17 "Seriously, fuck you, brother."

Shane Gillis 28:18 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 28:19 "I'm like, 'Fuck you.'"

Shane Gillis 28:19 No, they've spen-... They're all fucking... Especially back then.

Joe Rogan 28:22 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 28:22 ... broidered out, lifting every day, drinking every day, fighting every day.

Joe Rogan 28:25 Oh.

Shane Gillis 28:26 Yeah.

28:26 They were... For, like, five straight years, they hated... They just hated each other.

Joe Rogan 28:28 W- Was it Jake The Snake or was it The Undertaker that had the broken eye sockets?

Shane Gillis 28:34 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 28:34 Was it The Undertaker?

Shane Gillis 28:36 Yeah, yeah.

28:36 Weren't there, like, five Undertakers?

Joe Rogan 28:37 It was The Undertaker.

Shane Gillis 28:37 He had a special mask he had to wear for a while.

Joe Rogan 28:38 He, he sh- shattered his fucking eye socket in the middle of a match. This Mexican dude landed on his face. His move, instead of fucking your face, he would drop his butt on your face.

Shane Gillis 28:48 Oh. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 28:49 So, he drops his butt on... Who was it? It was, like, a famous guy.

Shane Gillis 28:53 Um... Yep.

Joe Rogan 28:54 Mysterio?

Shane Gillis 28:55 No.

Joe Rogan 28:55 No?

Shane Gillis 28:56 Giant guy. Uh...

28:58 (laughs) That's crazy.

Joe Rogan 28:59 This dude landed his butt on his face and broke-

Shane Gillis 29:00 (laughs)

29:01 Oh.

29:01 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 29:01 ... his eye socket. And so he's like, "Ah!" And he's gotta finish the match. He's gotta finish this match with a-

Shane Gillis 29:06 Undertaker.

Joe Rogan 29:06 ... broken, broken eye socket.

Shane Gillis 29:06 (laughs) Is that why his-

29:07 (laughs)

29:07 ... eyes started going up like this all the time?

Joe Rogan 29:09 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 29:09 (laughs)

29:09 (laughs)

29:09 Oh, that was huge. Well, he actually said he ran into a clothesline. I'm reading a quote from, uh...

29:13 Oh, he ran into a clothesline.

29:14 But it turns out it was that guy, Mabel.

Joe Rogan 29:16 Hmm, okay. I thought, I thought the guy landed on his face. Didn't you think so?

Shane Gillis 29:19 He says he's, he's like... He was 6-foot-8, 500 pounds and ran straight into what was supposed to be a clothesline, but he was so gassed and ended up hitting a s- spot on his arm which immediately tore it.

29:26 Oh.

Joe Rogan 29:26 Actually, Jamie, I think he broke his eye socket twice. I think, if I remember correctly, he broke bot- broke both eye sockets.

Shane Gillis 29:35 Well, this is him p-

Joe Rogan 29:36 Jesus.

Shane Gillis 29:36 According to this, it says this is what he said on the Joe Rogan Experience.

Joe Rogan 29:39 Oh.

Shane Gillis 29:41 So... Both eyes, both guys.

Joe Rogan 29:42 Yeah, both eye sockets. Yeah. See, that's right. One was because the guy was completely out of shape, a lot of similarities. The other one, I think, was the f- the butt to the face.

Shane Gillis 29:52 Oh.

Joe Rogan 29:53 I think he's saying he broke both 'cause we showed another one that he did where the guy wasn't as big who landed on his face. I, I might be remembering this wrong. I've, I have a very limited memory for pro wrestling.

Shane Gillis 30:04 (laughs)

30:04 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 30:05 I watch, I go, "Yeah, that's great. They threw their grandma through the table." That's it.

Shane Gillis 30:07 Threw the grandma through the table was pretty awesome.

30:09 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 30:09 I'll delete that by the end of the week.

Shane Gillis 30:10 (laughs)

30:11 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 30:11 By the end of the week, I'll have no knowledge that that happened.

Shane Gillis 30:12 No, you'll never know that ever happened. (laughs)

30:14 (laughs) You'll never be able to dream about it.

Joe Rogan 30:16 (laughs) Dude, I remember-

Shane Gillis 30:16 You're right, you're right. Rey Mysterio did hit him and that caused some damage.

30:19 There you go.

Joe Rogan 30:19 Yeah, okay, so it was Mysterio.

Shane Gillis 30:21 Oh, he did it with Hurricane Rana.

Joe Rogan 30:22 And he landed... I think he landed with his butt on his face. See if you can find it.

Shane Gillis 30:25 Well, Rey Mysterio's super small. That's not the butt face. He got hit in the face by him, I think.

30:29 But Rey Mysterio would be hopping around like that.

Joe Rogan 30:30 You said he's super small.Yeah.

Matt McCusker 30:32 That's boning, boning butt.

Joe Rogan 30:33 Yeah, that's, he, I think he landed on his face.

Matt McCusker 30:34 Oh, dude.

Joe Rogan 30:35 I think that's the th- that's the reason why he got him that way, 'cause he landed with his butt on his face.

Matt McCusker 30:40 The dead man. (laughs) The dead man. (laughs) Yeah.

Joe Rogan 30:44 So gross.

Shane Gillis 30:44 ... landed on Undertaker's head. He mistimed a top rope senton.

Matt McCusker 30:48 Imagine waiting for that.

Joe Rogan 30:48 And landed on The Undertaker's head. Yeah. He landed on his head with his butt.

Matt McCusker 30:51 Ah.

Shane Gillis 30:53 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 30:53 Yeah, he mistimed the move and landed on his face, and broke his face.

Matt McCusker 30:57 Dude, imagine looking forward to that all day. That guy's gonna put, like jump on your face with his ass. You know that's coming. You're like, "Fuck, dude."

Shane Gillis 31:03 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 31:03 How about the other guy fucking your face?

Matt McCusker 31:05 Yeah. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 31:05 Fucking your face, a- and you have to, like lay there like you're out cold, "Oh."

Matt McCusker 31:08 You have to... In front of an arena.

Joe Rogan 31:09 And this dude's just-

Matt McCusker 31:10 You gotta get-

Joe Rogan 31:10 ... bang, bang, bang, and then suck it right in front of you. That's your job.

Matt McCusker 31:14 Remember the wrestlers that never won? They'd be like Kevin. Yes.

Joe Rogan 31:17 Kevin would come out and just get smashed every time. (laughs)

Shane Gillis 31:19 Yeah. Yeah, that's right.

Matt McCusker 31:20 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 31:21 That dude has to sit there-

Joe Rogan 31:22 Kevin. (laughs)

Shane Gillis 31:22 ... and get his face fucked. The whole crowd's like, "You're fucking gay, pussy."

Joe Rogan 31:26 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 31:26 And then you gotta go back.

Matt McCusker 31:28 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 31:28 Everyone's like, "The guy who fucked you is awesome."

Joe Rogan 31:30 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 31:31 They're probably all sitting in a locker room. They're like, "Nice work, dude."

Shane Gillis 31:33 Oh.

Joe Rogan 31:33 That's what's so weird about wrestling-

Matt McCusker 31:34 The divas don't even look at you.

Joe Rogan 31:35 ... how enthusiastic people get.

Matt McCusker 31:37 The divas, dude. Yeah, it's fucking crazy.

Joe Rogan 31:39 They get angry, they get so fucking angry at the bad guy. (laughs)

Matt McCusker 31:42 It's crazy.

Shane Gillis 31:43 They fire him up. Those bad guys will come out and be like, "Delaware? What a bunch of fucking retards are you guys."

Joe Rogan 31:50 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 31:50 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 31:50 And they're all just like, "No."

Matt McCusker 31:53 Well, do you ever watch the Andy Kaufman?

Shane Gillis 31:55 They'd have Arabs... They'd have Arab dudes come out and be like, "America fucking sucks ass." (laughs)

Matt McCusker 32:00 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 32:00 And these dudes are like, "Take that the fuck back."

Joe Rogan 32:03 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 32:03 Wasn't that the Iron Sheik?

Shane Gillis 32:04 Yeah, Iron Sheik. They had dudes come out for everything.

Matt McCusker 32:06 Oh.

Shane Gillis 32:06 There was Russians. They have everybody. Back in the day, like The Rock was part of, uh, Nation of Domination.

Matt McCusker 32:13 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 32:13 They were like black (laughs) African extremists-

Matt McCusker 32:15 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 32:15 ... that would come out and be like... (laughs) In front of all the white people. They were like, "No."

Matt McCusker 32:20 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 32:20 "No."

Joe Rogan 32:20 Did you ever watch the Andy Kaufman films?

Shane Gillis 32:22 Yes, WrestleForGirls.

Joe Rogan 32:22 When he was doing pro wrestling? That was crazy.

Shane Gillis 32:25 Hilarious.

Joe Rogan 32:26 The fact that he decided that that was what he was gonna do. There they are.

Shane Gillis 32:30 Bring that down to South Carolina.

Matt McCusker 32:31 I think the C- I think the CIA assassinated three of them, actually.

Shane Gillis 32:34 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 32:35 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 32:35 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 32:35 Two of them were FBI informants.

Joe Rogan 32:37 Jamie, see if you can find some of the Andy Kaufman footage.

Shane Gillis 32:39 The Rock was a snitch, dude.

Joe Rogan 32:40 The Rock was a snitch. (laughs)

Shane Gillis 32:40 He snitched on Farouk, dude.

Joe Rogan 32:41 He told them, "We're gonna make you a movie star."

Shane Gillis 32:43 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 32:43 "Just gotta give up your brother."

Shane Gillis 32:44 You gotta snitch on Farouk. He did it.

Joe Rogan 32:46 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 32:47 He put a bomb in Farouk's house.

Shane Gillis 32:50 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 32:50 Imagine if it turns out The Rock's working for the FBI the whole time.

Matt McCusker 32:53 How could he not be?

Shane Gillis 32:54 Yeah, at this point, how could he not be?

Matt McCusker 32:56 How can you think they made so many Jumanjis, dude?

Joe Rogan 32:58 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 32:58 Yeah, it's fucking intelligence written all over it, dude.

Matt McCusker 33:01 That's Mockingbird, bro. Jumanji's Mockingbird.

Shane Gillis 33:03 Jumanji was a fun movie, man. How dare you?

Joe Rogan 33:05 Dude-

Shane Gillis 33:05 Jumanji is... Wait-

Joe Rogan 33:07 Hit the record.

Shane Gillis 33:07 ... is that the first one?

Joe Rogan 33:07 Hit the record. Hit the record.

Shane Gillis 33:09 I- Wait, the Robin Williams one was incredible.

Joe Rogan 33:11 No, I went to see the f- The Rock one with my kids. I loved it.

Shane Gillis 33:13 All right. With kids, maybe, dude. I would-

Joe Rogan 33:15 Check the record I played Jumanji.

Shane Gillis 33:17 I had a... I had a rough one.

Joe Rogan 33:17 (laughs) I played Jumanji.

Shane Gillis 33:19 You liked Jumanji?

Joe Rogan 33:19 We played it.

Shane Gillis 33:20 You guys have kids.

Joe Rogan 33:20 It's a good movie. It's a good movie if you have kids.

Matt McCusker 33:21 I was gonna watch it at 4:00. I watched it at 4:00.

Shane Gillis 33:23 I was in Boston by myself.

Joe Rogan 33:25 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 33:25 I was doing comedy. I had to kill a whole day. I had nowhere to stay.

Joe Rogan 33:28 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 33:28 I went to a Panera Bread by my-

Joe Rogan 33:30 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 33:30 I had never drank coffee before in my life.

Joe Rogan 33:32 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 33:33 I was like 30. I'd never drank coffee. (laughs) I just... Chugging cold brews all day.

Matt McCusker 33:38 Ugh.

Shane Gillis 33:38 I didn't know it would give you a panic attack. I had-

Joe Rogan 33:40 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 33:41 And then I went and saw Jumanji by myself at like 2:30 PM.

Matt McCusker 33:45 Oh, my God.

Shane Gillis 33:46 And I was in there just like, "Holy shit, dude."

Matt McCusker 33:48 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 33:48 "I'm a fucking moron." (laughs) I saw Jumanji by myself.

Matt McCusker 33:52 I feel bad.

Shane Gillis 33:53 And then I called Matt and I was like, "Man, I want to quit comedy, dude. I'm so fucking sad." (laughs)

Matt McCusker 34:00 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 34:00 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 34:00 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 34:00 I was like, "I've been in Pana- I've been in a Panera for four hours drinking iced coffees."

Shane Gillis 34:04 I... Bro, 10, 10 hours.

Matt McCusker 34:05 "By myself." (laughs)

Joe Rogan 34:05 Oh, no.

Shane Gillis 34:06 I spent a whole day in a Panera.

Matt McCusker 34:08 Oh, my God.

Shane Gillis 34:08 I had no money.

Joe Rogan 34:09 Dude. Yeah.

Shane Gillis 34:10 That's hilarious. I had $0.

Joe Rogan 34:11 Watch the one where you were 30.

Shane Gillis 34:12 I saved up to see Jumanji. Yeah, it was recent.

Matt McCusker 34:13 You, you gave me so many fire movie recommends, and finally I came out at Jumanji. I was like, "Shane's gonna like this." And he gave a panic attack.

Shane Gillis 34:19 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 34:19 I was like, "Fuck. My bad, dude."

Shane Gillis 34:22 It, it... (laughs)

Joe Rogan 34:23 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 34:23 I, it fucked me up. How crazy was it?

Shane Gillis 34:24 I was in there by myself watching Jumanji, just-

Matt McCusker 34:27 Dude.

Shane Gillis 34:27 It's like, this is for real the low point. This is like a fucked-up thing.

Matt McCusker 34:30 Dude, I used to-

Joe Rogan 34:31 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 34:31 I'm an adult. It was a weekday.

Joe Rogan 34:33 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 34:34 2:00 PM in Boston.

Joe Rogan 34:35 That is a weird thing.

Matt McCusker 34:36 And that, that was before... Yeah, that was like, "This could capsize. My whole life could capsize."

Shane Gillis 34:42 My life... It was capsized. I was swimming.

Matt McCusker 34:44 True, true. (laughs)

Shane Gillis 34:44 I was... Dude, my ex-girlfriend gave me her old laptop, so I had like a Chromebook that was like a $90 Chromebook.

Matt McCusker 34:51 Your laptop was dead.

Shane Gillis 34:52 I was by myself. I would find websites that had old games. I was playing like SimCity '98.

Joe Rogan 35:00 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 35:00 Chugging cold brew.

Matt McCusker 35:01 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 35:01 Dude, this is fucked up. Now that I'm saying it.

Joe Rogan 35:03 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 35:04 Then I was like, "Oh, there's a movie theater in the parking lot. I'll go see whatever they have." Jumanji at 2:30.

Matt McCusker 35:08 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 35:09 I'm in.

Joe Rogan 35:09 Yeah, those days on the road in the early days, they can be... They're... They feel weird.

Matt McCusker 35:13 It's really sad.

Joe Rogan 35:14 And also, if you're working with people you don't like, like y- you show up in a town and the middle's a douche.

Matt McCusker 35:18 Dude, remember Fl- we went to Fl- I went with him to Florida.

Shane Gillis 35:21 Wow.

Matt McCusker 35:21 He got booked to go to Florida and I... He was like... I was like, "I'll just come with you and I'll, like host." And you were booked to feature.

Shane Gillis 35:27 Yeah, we did the ro- we did a whole Southern tour.

Matt McCusker 35:29 So he brought me, he brought me... I don't think anyone wanted me there at all. He brought me there. I forgot underwear at first, so I didn't pack underwear.

Shane Gillis 35:35 I was-

Matt McCusker 35:35 I had no undies the whole time.

Shane Gillis 35:36 I was a feature and I was like, "I got a guy I'm bringing." (laughs)

Joe Rogan 35:39 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 35:39 That's crazy.

Joe Rogan 35:40 That's hilarious.

Matt McCusker 35:41 The headliner stole his jokes.

Shane Gillis 35:43 (laughs) Yeah.

Joe Rogan 35:44 What?

Matt McCusker 35:44 The headliner was a guitar guy. And Shane would go up... I was, I was bombing constantly and Shane would go up. He was doing well, and the headliner started just like... He was bombing on a guitar, then he'd start doing callbacks to Shane's bits.

Shane Gillis 35:54 He did the whole-

Matt McCusker 35:54 And then he started just incorporating them into it. It was the craziest shit.

Shane Gillis 35:57 He just did my act. By the last couple shows-

Matt McCusker 35:59 Dude.

Shane Gillis 35:59 ... he was just stealing the thing.

Matt McCusker 36:00 It was crazy, dude.

Joe Rogan 36:01 Whoa.

Shane Gillis 36:01 But it was when I was new, so I was like, "That's cool."

Matt McCusker 36:04 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 36:04 You know, I was new enough to be like, at least, you know, he's saying that was good.

Matt McCusker 36:08 True.

Shane Gillis 36:08 But that was... Dude, it was me, him and the headliner in a comedy condo in South Carolina.

Matt McCusker 36:13 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 36:13 We just fucked with this dude. He sucked so fucking bad, dude.

Joe Rogan 36:18 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 36:18 We were, we were in a back green room, and there was like a pla- like plastic... You know the plastic that's supposed to look like crystal?

Shane Gillis 36:23 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 36:23 It was like plastic, like table stuff with lunch meat, and this guy's just crushing baloney being like, "Guys, I'm on the road all the time. I can get pussy anytime I want."

Shane Gillis 36:31 Oh, God. (laughs)

Matt McCusker 36:31 We're like, "Okay, dude. Yeah, right."

Shane Gillis 36:32 'Cause we were, we were... He was like, "Man, if I was your guys' age, if I was single like you guys, I'd be getting pussy too. I could go out there and get pussy if I wanted, but I'm not gonna..."

Matt McCusker 36:40 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 36:41 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 36:41 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 36:41 We were like, "Dude, he's standing eating lunch meat on a tray in a club in South Carolina."

Matt McCusker 36:46 Ugh, we were like, "He's a guitar act."

Joe Rogan 36:47 Yeah, we're, we're like a closet, like a Mexican bowling alley. And he's like, "Dude, I could clean up out there, dude. You guys have no idea." We're like, "Dude."

Shane Gillis 36:53 Oh, God.

Joe Rogan 36:53 Pretty sure you were just crying when we came in here. (laughs)

Shane Gillis 36:56 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 36:56 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 36:56 He was absolutely... (laughs)

Shane Gillis 36:59 That was a fun fucking trip.

Matt McCusker 37:00 Dude, that was so fun.

Shane Gillis 37:02 ... it was so funny. Me and him were young and just bullying a headline, just fully like, "Oh, is that what you said-"

Matt McCusker 37:07 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 37:07 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 37:07 ... "back at the condo?" And he'd be like, "Yeah, it is."

Matt McCusker 37:10 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 37:10 Those weird headliners that, you know, like, no one knows who they are-

Shane Gillis 37:14 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 37:14 ... but they kind of headline, and they go to some places and they've been doing it way too long.

Matt McCusker 37:18 Yeah, true.

Joe Rogan 37:18 They, they can achieve this very high level of toxic bitterness.

Matt McCusker 37:22 Uh, it's, it's Sith.

Joe Rogan 37:24 Yeah, you're around them then they have a couple of beers, and then they start looking at you sideways.

Shane Gillis 37:27 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 37:27 Dude-

Shane Gillis 37:28 And they try to... They're like... Oh, dude, that was a guy, he was like, "Oh, you guys are doing a podcast?"

Joe Rogan 37:34 Ugh.

Matt McCusker 37:35 Ugh.

Shane Gillis 37:35 And he goes, "All right, I guess we'll see, huh."

Matt McCusker 37:36 Don't waste your time.

Joe Rogan 37:37 Ugh. (laughs)

Matt McCusker 37:39 Fucking dickhead, dude. Yeah, that was very funny.

Shane Gillis 37:42 He was, yeah, he was just a bitter guy.

Joe Rogan 37:43 What year was this?

Matt McCusker 37:46 Fuck, man.

Shane Gillis 37:46 '16? '15?

Joe Rogan 37:47 Yeah, but to... In his defense, back then how many podcasts were there?

Matt McCusker 37:53 I don't know. Uh, there was enough.

Joe Rogan 37:54 I think people had already figured out that you could make money off of it.

Shane Gillis 37:57 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 37:58 By '15, yeah.

Shane Gillis 37:59 There was enough. He just was saying like every comedian does it. Trust me, I tried it, it didn't work. It's not gonna work for you guys.

Joe Rogan 38:06 Ugh.

Shane Gillis 38:06 We were like, "Dude, you fuck- (laughs) You suck."

Matt McCusker 38:09 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 38:11 I think it... The market's oversaturated now, but I still think people should do it. Like if I was a n- a new comic... Like if you're a new comic starting out now, y- you should do a podcast-

Matt McCusker 38:20 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 38:20 ... even if no one's gonna listen. Just keep doing it. Just do it and keep doing it and then it'll grow. But there's so many of them now. Yeah. Like trying to get an audience now s- it's so much harder than it was five years ago-

Matt McCusker 38:32 Yeah, but it's-

Joe Rogan 38:33 ... or six years ago.

Matt McCusker 38:33 I feel like if you're actively trying to get an audience, it comes... You have to just talk. Like I talk to myself when I drive anyway. I'll just talk-

Shane Gillis 38:39 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 38:39 ... I'm like, "Damn, I should have recor-..." It's so fucking good.

Joe Rogan 38:41 You talk out loud to yourself?

Matt McCusker 38:43 Yeah, I talk out loud constantly.

Joe Rogan 38:43 And you feel like, "Damn, I'm good."

Matt McCusker 38:44 It's fire, dude, while I'm driving.

Shane Gillis 38:45 It's so good.

Matt McCusker 38:45 I talk to myself all the t-... I'll k-... My kid will be in the backseat and I'll be talking to myself and turn around and be like, "Ha, ha, ha."

Joe Rogan 38:51 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 38:51 I can't stop.

Shane Gillis 38:52 You like that one?

Matt McCusker 38:52 I can't stop casting.

Shane Gillis 38:53 You're casting, dude.

Joe Rogan 38:54 Well, that's your thing always, is talking to yourself?

Matt McCusker 38:57 Sometimes I'll just talk. I'll... I don't, I don't realize I'm doing it. I'll be thinking, I'm gonna, I'll just start talking. I'll be like-

Shane Gillis 39:01 Jesus Christ, if I recorded what I was saying in, in a car.

Joe Rogan 39:04 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 39:07 Classified.

Shane Gillis 39:08 Be a quick podcast. Yeah, I wouldn't have it-

Joe Rogan 39:09 I don't think I've ever talked to myself-

Matt McCusker 39:10 Yeah. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 39:10 ... in the car.

Matt McCusker 39:11 Really? I do it constantly.

Shane Gillis 39:13 I don't think so.

Joe Rogan 39:13 No.

Matt McCusker 39:13 It's good. It's fun.

Joe Rogan 39:15 I'ma try it.

Matt McCusker 39:16 Yeah, dude.

Shane Gillis 39:16 Like talking out loud?

Matt McCusker 39:17 Yeah, just talking to yourself.

Joe Rogan 39:18 That'd be a good way to do a podcast.

Shane Gillis 39:20 That's fucking crazy.

Matt McCusker 39:20 Nah, it's good.

Joe Rogan 39:20 Like if you had a, if you had a Tesla-

Matt McCusker 39:22 Dude-

Joe Rogan 39:22 ... especially if you have a quiet car, you could like set up a camera and just do a podcast while you're driving.

Matt McCusker 39:27 Dude, I'm telling you, you, you access-

Joe Rogan 39:29 Didn't Bill, Bill Burr did stuff like that, but it was like more like him driving around like, "Oh, look at this fucking guy."

Shane Gillis 39:34 He would give a tour.

Joe Rogan 39:34 Yeah, he was giving a tour. That was fun.

Shane Gillis 39:35 That was good.

Joe Rogan 39:35 Yeah, it was good.

Shane Gillis 39:36 He would give tours of like towns and shit.

Joe Rogan 39:38 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 39:38 You driving and just talking must be-

Matt McCusker 39:40 Talking.

Shane Gillis 39:41 ... for real terrifying.

Matt McCusker 39:42 Fleshing out the ideas.

Joe Rogan 39:43 Uh.

Matt McCusker 39:44 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 39:45 Well, that's the way a lot of guys come up with material. Like that's how, uh, Dylan does it. He comes up with-

Matt McCusker 39:50 Podcasts.

Joe Rogan 39:50 ... so much material because he's podcasting all the time.

Matt McCusker 39:52 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 39:52 He's ranting about things, and some of them you can keep, you know, some of them are like genuinely good ideas.

Matt McCusker 39:58 2%, I would say. Genuinely (laughs) 100%.

Joe Rogan 40:00 But that's... If you fucking sling 10 around-

Matt McCusker 40:03 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 40:03 ... and you get pick up two, that's pretty good. That's pretty nice.

Shane Gillis 40:06 I was trying the, the ones we were... We, you and me worked, workshopped a couple jokes this week.

Matt McCusker 40:10 Oh, yeah.

Shane Gillis 40:10 The seller did not like them.

Matt McCusker 40:12 Good.

Joe Rogan 40:12 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 40:13 The seller wasn't that excited about it.

Matt McCusker 40:16 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 40:16 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 40:16 He's not gonna word it, I don't know how to word it.

Joe Rogan 40:17 How many sets did you do down there?

Shane Gillis 40:19 Uh, it was like five or six a night.

Joe Rogan 40:21 And so each set, the, the audience was similar?

Shane Gillis 40:25 Uh, I probably tried it twice and then scrapped it.

Matt McCusker 40:28 Eeh.

Shane Gillis 40:28 'Cause I was talking... We, me and Matt did a podcast that day, and we were talking about, uh, if there was like a parent sex, like pride parade. Like if, if you're... Uh, see, it doesn't work.

Matt McCusker 40:39 You gotta... If your parents flaunted their sexuality.

Shane Gillis 40:41 The way gay people do at the Pride Parade.

Matt McCusker 40:43 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 40:43 Like if it was your dad and your mom on a float like (gagging) and even a gay guy would be like, "Ew."

Joe Rogan 40:49 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 40:49 And then I was trying to say like that's... Look, I'm happy you guys are doing it, but that's how we feel. We're like, "Ew. I'm glad you're doing it, but gross, dude." And, uh, didn't work.

Matt McCusker 41:00 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 41:01 Still didn't work.

Matt McCusker 41:02 I mean, it's funny.

Joe Rogan 41:02 I see what you're saying. Yeah.

Matt McCusker 41:04 It's a fair point.

Joe Rogan 41:05 It's a good point.

Matt McCusker 41:06 I mean, again, do what you wanna do.

Shane Gillis 41:07 The dog general worked.

Matt McCusker 41:09 Did it?

Shane Gillis 41:09 I might be onto something there.

Matt McCusker 41:11 The dog general?

Shane Gillis 41:11 That, that fucking dude that retired in the military with a dog mask. I don't even know if it's real.

Joe Rogan 41:16 What?

Shane Gillis 41:16 This, this guy from the military retired and he was wearing a fucking leather dog mask in his uniform, like in front of the flag.

Joe Rogan 41:24 What?

Shane Gillis 41:25 It might be fake. I might have got tricked. But either way.

Joe Rogan 41:27 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 41:27 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 41:27 They were using it on Twitter.

Joe Rogan 41:29 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 41:29 He was like, "Commander Bow Wow is retiring, arf, arf." (laughs) Like that was the end of it.

Joe Rogan 41:34 What?

Shane Gillis 41:34 But they were using it-

Joe Rogan 41:35 Doggy play.

Shane Gillis 41:35 On Twitter, they were trying to make fun of the US military. They were like, "Here's China's military, here's Russia's military." And it's like skinheads that are like, "Yeah." And then it was, "Here's ours." It's a bunch of trans people and the dog guy. And the joke is, for real, that's absolutely more terrifying.

Joe Rogan 41:51 Mm-hmm.

Shane Gillis 41:51 Like that's a truly scary military, that we had a furry with fucking missiles behind him.

Matt McCusker 41:56 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 41:56 That's like an actual lunatic.

Matt McCusker 41:58 That's a problem.

Joe Rogan 41:59 If it's real.

Shane Gillis 42:00 It's probably not real, but I like it.

Joe Rogan 42:01 It might not be real.

Matt McCusker 42:02 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 42:02 Dude, there's footage, there's footage that comes out of this war-

Shane Gillis 42:05 Also another Joe Schmo, 0 for fucking 8.

Matt McCusker 42:08 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 42:08 There's footage that's come out of this war that is different than any footage of any war that I've ever seen because it's on cell phones.

Shane Gillis 42:15 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 42:15 Oh.

Joe Rogan 42:15 There's so much cell phone footage from this war.

Shane Gillis 42:18 Dude, when planes are flying low over like apartments and shit.

Joe Rogan 42:20 Yeah, but I'm talking about like one-on-one combat situations with guns.

Shane Gillis 42:25 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 42:25 Like I've seen a bunch of them now. And one I saw yesterday was this guy was, uh, in a, in a gunfight in the woods. So he's hiding behind trees and the trees have like big chunks of fucking wood missing from them 'cause a bullet just hit it.

Shane Gillis 42:40 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 42:40 I mean, like a, like a fucking movie, right? And he runs to these Ukrainian guys that are in a foxhole and he's got the drop on them. And I don't know what he's saying, like he's saying, "Surrender, give..." And the guy reaches up to grab his gun and he ices the both of them in the head.

Shane Gillis 42:56 Ugh.

Joe Rogan 42:56 Down, down at close range.

Shane Gillis 42:59 Ugh.

Joe Rogan 42:59 From three feet away. And you're watching just like, "Holy shit."

Matt McCusker 43:02 Jesus.

Joe Rogan 43:04 ... like, this is what they're going through over there. This is, this, this is the real war.

Matt McCusker 43:08 God damn.

Joe Rogan 43:08 This is really what wars are. And they're filming it on their cellphones.

Matt McCusker 43:11 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 43:11 Now imagine a furry.

Matt McCusker 43:14 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 43:14 That's in a drone just like, "What are they doing down there? Ber-ber-berru." (laughs)

Matt McCusker 43:17 It's like Spaceballs, he's up in the ship. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 43:19 Whoop. He sends up drone strikes. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Well, that would be the scariest thing if someone had real drone, like those dog drones with guns on them. Ugh.

Shane Gillis 43:28 Oh.

Joe Rogan 43:28 And they just sent those after people.

Shane Gillis 43:29 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 43:30 Yeah. Why don't we just send, like, a bunch of ro- we definitely have, like, war robots. Why don't we just be like, "Yo, here. Use our war robots."

Joe Rogan 43:35 That's-

Matt McCusker 43:35 I guess you can't... I guess, I don't know.

Joe Rogan 43:36 I wonder if the... In... Some... A friend... I don't know if this is true either. We'll find this out. What was the other thing that we were just trying to find out?

Shane Gillis 43:42 Dog General. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 43:42 Dog General. Dog General, is that real?

Matt McCusker 43:46 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 43:46 Come on, dude.

Matt McCusker 43:49 Um, I supported the Dog General.

Joe Rogan 43:51 Well, my friend was telling me-

Shane Gillis 43:51 I know Dog General is out there. He's probably listening right now, "Woof, woof, woof."

Matt McCusker 43:54 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 43:55 What my friend was telling me, when he served overseas, because of the Geneva Convention...

Shane Gillis 44:00 (laughs) .

Joe Rogan 44:02 That's real?

Matt McCusker 44:03 That's not real, bro.

Shane Gillis 44:03 That's Dog General.

Matt McCusker 44:04 That's fucking real as hell.

Joe Rogan 44:05 That is so photoshopped.

Matt McCusker 44:06 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 44:06 So real. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 44:08 They not gonna make... Let that guy wear a dog mask.

Matt McCusker 44:09 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 44:09 The Dog General.

Matt McCusker 44:10 That's scary, for real.

Shane Gillis 44:12 Exactly. They want to make fun of us for having trans and furries in our military. Good luck fighting those dudes.

Joe Rogan 44:18 Maybe that's just what he does during, like, formal events, and regular times he's just a straight up killer.

Matt McCusker 44:23 We should bomb other countries that make fun of our trans military members.

Shane Gillis 44:27 For real.

Matt McCusker 44:27 Yeah, fuck that.

Shane Gillis 44:29 You want to fuck with us?

Joe Rogan 44:30 What was the other thing that I was gonna look up?

Matt McCusker 44:32 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 44:32 We're going to look something else up.

Matt McCusker 44:33 Oh, um, I know what you're talking... The, uh... Ah, fuck, I don't know.

Shane Gillis 44:38 Jamie, I can't believe you're not finding the Dog General, dude.

Narrator 44:40 What?

Matt McCusker 44:40 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 44:40 What was the other question I asked? There's the guy with the mask, and what was the other one?

Narrator 44:44 U- u- ukraine video stuff.

Joe Rogan 44:47 No, no. There was something... I know what you're talking about.

Matt McCusker 44:49 Oh.

Shane Gillis 44:49 God dammit.

Narrator 44:50 The last thing I had up was the Andy Kaufman stuff. But...

Joe Rogan 44:51 No, there was... You were talking about cellphone videos.

Matt McCusker 44:54 Yeah, we're going all over the road.

Joe Rogan 44:54 Yeah, we're all over the place. You were talking about cellphone videos, the Russia/Ukraine-

Shane Gillis 44:57 About you talking in your car while you-

Joe Rogan 44:58 Oh, sending robots into, uh-

Narrator 45:00 Oh, yeah. Drone robots.

Joe Rogan 45:01 Drone robots.

Matt McCusker 45:01 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 45:02 There he is. That's real.

Joe Rogan 45:03 Going to the dogs.

Matt McCusker 45:04 That's real?

Shane Gillis 45:05 No. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 45:06 American Conservative, dude. What are you talking about?

Shane Gillis 45:07 Celebrate Pup Pride. (laughs)

Matt McCusker 45:10 (Laughs) Oh, dude. That's...

Joe Rogan 45:11 Wait a minute. So this is gay officers only wear these masks?

Shane Gillis 45:15 No, I don't know what this means. Yeah.

Joe Rogan 45:15 But doesn't it... Scroll back up.

Matt McCusker 45:17 It's done. This guy is stealing valor.

Joe Rogan 45:18 What does it say? Scroll all the way up.

Matt McCusker 45:19 (laughs) He's stealing valor.

Joe Rogan 45:19 It says, "Celebrate Pup Pride with the Armed Forces. Gay officers pretend to be K-9s for sadomesticistic sex games."

Shane Gillis 45:28 This is the classic website, theamericanconservative.com.

Matt McCusker 45:31 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 45:31 Dude, that's like the Washington Post to me.

Matt McCusker 45:34 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 45:34 True, true. (laughs)

Narrator 45:35 This is my WhatsApp. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 45:36 They're all, they're all the same now.

Matt McCusker 45:38 Yeah. They're... He's pretty bad.

Joe Rogan 45:40 Okay, so the guy likes to wear a mask.

Shane Gillis 45:42 I know. That's the point. And then China and Russia were trying to make fun of us. They were like, "Look how weird we are," and it's like, "Bro, our guys will fuck you guys up." Look at that guy.

Matt McCusker 45:48 Dude.

Joe Rogan 45:48 There was a thing that I... Another thing I wanted to ask.

Matt McCusker 45:50 Fuck that.

Joe Rogan 45:50 But I forget. But there is one thing. Uh, someone told me that during th- th- uh, o- overseas war, during the Geneva Con- because of the Geneva Convention-

Shane Gillis 45:58 There you go.

Narrator 45:59 (inhales through nose loudly)

Joe Rogan 45:59 ... you, you aren't allowed to have, like, hollow point bullets in your pistol. (clears throat) You, you have to have... It's an unfair advantage.

Shane Gillis 46:07 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 46:07 Really?

Joe Rogan 46:08 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 46:08 They use musket balls?

Joe Rogan 46:09 No, you have to use, like, practice rounds-

Matt McCusker 46:11 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 46:11 ... that you use at the range. Is that true?

Narrator 46:13 "1899, prohibited the use of international warfare bullets that easily expand or flatten in the body."

Joe Rogan 46:18 What?

Shane Gillis 46:18 Dumb-dumbs.

Narrator 46:19 "It is a common misapprehension that a hollow point ammunition is prohibited by the Geneva Convention, as the prohibition significantly predates those conventions."

Joe Rogan 46:28 But they still do implement that, though.

Matt McCusker 46:32 (clears throat)

Narrator 46:32 Um...

Joe Rogan 46:32 My friend who served was explaining to me the rounds that they made them use over there.

Matt McCusker 46:37 What?

Joe Rogan 46:38 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 46:38 They tried to outlaw fucking night vision, dude.

Joe Rogan 46:40 Now, I don't know if that was just his unit.

Matt McCusker 46:42 What?

Joe Rogan 46:42 I don't know. But that's crazy.

Shane Gillis 46:44 They tried to be like, "This is unfair what you guys are doing."

Matt McCusker 46:46 Do you know how crazy it is?

Joe Rogan 46:46 Give it-

Matt McCusker 46:47 ... fair and unfair when it comes to killing people.

Narrator 46:48 I'm digging through it. It's gonna get weird. "2015, DOD law, war manual returns hollow point bullets to armed conflict." So I don't know.

Joe Rogan 46:55 Mm. Well, I think he was-

Shane Gillis 46:56 Imagine passing that bill.

Narrator 46:57 But it's overseas, you said, I guess, right?

Joe Rogan 46:58 Yeah, but he was-

Matt McCusker 46:59 Get those back in here.

Narrator 46:59 ... overseas.

Shane Gillis 47:00 It's time for some dude's heads to fucking explode. (laughs)

Narrator 47:03 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 47:03 Well, I don't know if that's true, but that was what he had said.

Narrator 47:07 When did they have hollow point bullets, in 1899, I guess, is what this is saying.

Matt McCusker 47:09 Yeah, but doesn't this stuff go out the window when, like, guys started fighting for their survival?

Joe Rogan 47:13 It certainly should.

Narrator 47:14 You know?

Matt McCusker 47:14 Like, I wouldn't want to break those rules.

Joe Rogan 47:16 But when you're seeing a scene like I saw with the foxhole and, you know, that this is what these guys are going through today, and it's all done on someone's fucking Samsung Galaxy-

Shane Gillis 47:25 God damn.

Joe Rogan 47:25 ... so it's like clear video.

Shane Gillis 47:26 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 47:27 It's horrible.

Matt McCusker 47:29 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 47:29 It's, it's, it's real close up, too. It's like whoo.

Matt McCusker 47:32 It's kind of embarrassing at this point. It's like, "Dude, you guys are really... What are we doing? Just shooting each other in the face right now?"

Shane Gillis 47:38 War? Yeah.

Matt McCusker 47:39 At this point it's kind of embarrassing.

Narrator 47:40 It's still happening.

Matt McCusker 47:40 It's like, come on, man.

Joe Rogan 47:42 Well, civilizations, when they evolve with war, you never kind of get them out. I think the, the, the only chance we have is if we keep, like, all moving to a new place with a new agreement. Like, the reason why United States was so much different than anywhere else is 'cause the majority of the people just said, "Look, let's get the fuck out of here and start in a new place."

Shane Gillis 48:03 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 48:03 'Cause this shit's crazy. And then everybody was like, "Hey, where'd you guys go?" (laughs)

Shane Gillis 48:06 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 48:06 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 48:06 Come back.

Joe Rogan 48:06 And then that place, that new place became the shit. Yeah.

Matt McCusker 48:10 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 48:10 That's really what America is. But then eventually it gets fucked too. Like, we don't have the same, like, physical wars on our borders, 'cause we're luckily surrounded by water. But we're still engaging in it all over the place, and ramped up. It's like we're involved in so many different conflicts-

Shane Gillis 48:26 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 48:26 ... all over the world. It's almost like the only way you're ever going to stop that is if people keep... Was like, "All right. That's... This one didn't work either. Let's keep going one more time."

Matt McCusker 48:34 (laughs)

Narrator 48:34 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 48:34 "Antarctica, here we go."

Matt McCusker 48:35 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 48:35 And take over that one, and then do that for a few hundred years.

Matt McCusker 48:38 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 48:38 And then fuck that up, and then everyone learn... It- it's like the lessons that people learn in civilization, they take forever. They take forever.

Matt McCusker 48:48 True.

Joe Rogan 48:48 To... We're still doing the death penalty. We know how many people are innocent that are on death row.

Matt McCusker 48:52 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 48:52 We know. We know we're killing innocent people.

Matt McCusker 48:55 Fuck.

Joe Rogan 48:55 They're like, "Yeah, but uh, fucking win's a win."Win's a win. (imitates drum roll)

Shane Gillis 49:00 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 49:00 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 49:00 Yeah, I mean-

Shane Gillis 49:01 It is one innocent person's... That's terrible.

Matt McCusker 49:03 Oh, that sucks.

Shane Gillis 49:04 Imagine being-

Matt McCusker 49:05 Insane.

Shane Gillis 49:05 ... falsely accused the whole time, and you're like, "No."

Joe Rogan 49:07 Dude, I've had multiple men like that on my podcast-

Shane Gillis 49:10 Ugh.

Joe Rogan 49:11 ... because of the stuff that I do with Josh Dubin, who used to be an ambassador for the Innocence Project-

Shane Gillis 49:15 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 49:15 ... and then he went off to... He's released dozens of these people, and the stories are hard. Well, you're crying. I'm doing a podcast-

Shane Gillis 49:21 Might've heard one you had on air.

Joe Rogan 49:23 I- I've- I've had a few of him on.

Shane Gillis 49:23 The guy with the little girl, and it was DNA reversed it. Maybe it was on here.

Joe Rogan 49:26 Yeah, there's been a bunch of 'em.

Shane Gillis 49:28 Oh.

Matt McCusker 49:28 There's been a bunch of 'em.

Shane Gillis 49:28 They're like, "We saw you with her the last time." That was all it took.

Joe Rogan 49:32 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 49:32 And then they found he couldn't afford DNA testing or something.

Joe Rogan 49:35 Well, there was one guy who was an immigrant who, uh, c- walked into a trailer after this woman had murdered someone, and his footprints got everywhere, and they blamed him, and he was in jail for 20 years, like, that kind of shit.

Matt McCusker 49:46 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 49:46 (laughs) He's like, "Why is he walking around?"

Matt McCusker 49:48 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 49:48 Well, it's like, "What the fuck's going on?" Like, imagine you're going-

Matt McCusker 49:50 Always checking up on it. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 49:51 ... checking on people, and you open the door, and someone's been knifed to death.

Shane Gillis 49:55 Oh, no.

Joe Rogan 49:55 And you're like, "Holy shit."

Shane Gillis 49:56 No.

Joe Rogan 49:56 And you're- you're just realizing, and you try and turn the lights on. Like, "What the fuck's going on?" And- and he's an illegal immigrant. He's from another country.

Shane Gillis 50:03 Yeah, so he tried to hide, but-

Joe Rogan 50:04 And then the woman blames it on him, and it's just crazy.

Matt McCusker 50:08 Ugh, it fucking sucks.

Joe Rogan 50:09 And these... It's just such a flawed system. And the thing is, like, there's an incentive for a prosecutor, once they're starting to try a case, they wanna win that fucking case.

Shane Gillis 50:18 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 50:18 They got a record. They have a reputation, and so they're trying to win. And when it's, like, a government prosecutor or, you know, like, a- a district attorney, and they know there's some information that would exonerate that person, they're just like (imitates quick typing) .

Shane Gillis 50:31 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 50:31 They don't give a fuck.

Shane Gillis 50:32 That also, that seems like a problem, making it, like, competitive-

Joe Rogan 50:35 Yes.

Shane Gillis 50:35 ... for lawyers.

Matt McCusker 50:36 Yes.

Joe Rogan 50:36 It's very bad.

Shane Gillis 50:37 To be like, "I wanna win," and then there are DA's that are like, "I- I arrested the most people."

Matt McCusker 50:41 Exactly.

Shane Gillis 50:41 It's like, yeah.

Joe Rogan 50:42 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 50:42 Right. Then they run for office. It's like, remember that? And they're like, "Eh."

Shane Gillis 50:45 "I was tough on crime," and then all of a sudden-

Matt McCusker 50:46 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 50:46 ... 10 years later, being tough on crime is racist.

Matt McCusker 50:48 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 50:49 You're like, "I wasn't tough on crime."

Joe Rogan 50:50 Duh. I smoke weed.

Shane Gillis 50:51 "Now I'm the vice president." (laughs)

Matt McCusker 50:52 Yeah, man. I didn't call him super criminals.

Joe Rogan 50:56 (laughs) Yeah. Super predators.

Shane Gillis 50:57 Now I'm woke. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 50:57 Super predators, right.

Shane Gillis 50:58 Yeah, super predators is nuts.

Matt McCusker 50:59 That's crazy. That's crazy he's getting jammed up on, like, manila folders when he was, like, kissing 12-year-old girls on camera.

Joe Rogan 51:06 Dude, I don't know jack-

Shane Gillis 51:08 Oh, Joe Biden. Yeah. Hangin' out with Clinton.

Joe Rogan 51:08 I don't know jack shit about politics, but if I had to guess, I'm... They're trying to get rid of him.

Matt McCusker 51:14 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 51:14 That would-

Matt McCusker 51:15 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 51:15 My guess would be they're trying to get rid of him. If all of a sudden their- his own aides are sending these... Instead of, like, taking these classified documents, which you have located-

Matt McCusker 51:26 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 51:26 ... and go, "Well, let's not do that again," and fucking locking him up somewhere, his own aides-

Shane Gillis 51:31 Self-reporting?

Joe Rogan 51:32 Dude.

Shane Gillis 51:34 Come on, dude.

Joe Rogan 51:34 That sounds suss. Well, no one self-reported that fucking laptop.

Matt McCusker 51:38 I know.

Joe Rogan 51:38 That laptop...

Shane Gillis 51:39 That was, well, that was Russian disinformation.

Joe Rogan 51:40 They...

Shane Gillis 51:41 That reeks of Russian disinformation. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 51:42 They- they got ahold of the social media companies and lied to them. They did whatever the fuck they could to keep that from happening. And even this, they discovered this before the midterms.

Shane Gillis 51:53 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 51:54 Yes.

Joe Rogan 51:54 So they didn't release the information until after the midterms.

Matt McCusker 51:57 I- I mean, dude, I mean, everyone said this a million times, but, like, the news, if that was Flip Flop, if it was, you know, Trump's kid, that would've been all over. It would've been like, "This is the fate of our democracy, rest in the sons of..."

Joe Rogan 52:08 100%.

Shane Gillis 52:08 Yeah.

Matt McCusker 52:08 Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

Joe Rogan 52:10 100%. And the media would've gone right along with it.

Matt McCusker 52:12 Yeah, and it's, like, so obvious, and it sounds trite, but it's like, but it's like, dude, why do they-

Joe Rogan 52:15 And this is...

Matt McCusker 52:16 Who, what's- what's the, what's the incentive to be like, "Nah, fuck that guy, not that guy." It's like, that kind of freaks me out.

Joe Rogan 52:21 Dude, there's a bunch of us that are just unrepresented. It's the reasonable middle, the reasonable middle of the world, unrepresented. You've got radical left and radical right. You got people that are all in on the Republican Party, and you should never get an abortion even if you've been raped.

Matt McCusker 52:38 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 52:38 You got wild shit on that side. And on the other side, you got men can get pregnant. You got-

Matt McCusker 52:43 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 52:43 You got all this chaos. You got, you know, FTX, those... Uh, he- he was just making mistakes, no big deal. It's li- we should barely even attack him. We don't even need to bring him in. Come on, guys.

Matt McCusker 52:57 Yeah, why wouldn't they pro- why would they let that guy off the hook?

Joe Rogan 52:59 The number two donor to the Democratic Party.

Matt McCusker 53:01 Oh, duh.

Joe Rogan 53:02 Number two.

Shane Gillis 53:04 (laughs)

Matt McCusker 53:04 Yeah, like-

Joe Rogan 53:04 Just by George Soros, and they're like-

Matt McCusker 53:06 Oh.

Joe Rogan 53:06 ... "Whatever, whatever." No one's freaking out. Everyone who-

Shane Gillis 53:09 My favorite is, uh, the Republicans hanging onto that Santos dude.

Joe Rogan 53:12 That is wild.

Shane Gillis 53:13 (laughs) The Republicans are like, "No, he's a good dude."

Joe Rogan 53:15 That guy should be in jail.

Matt McCusker 53:16 Who's Santos?

Shane Gillis 53:17 Santos is the guy who's like, "I'm Jewish."

Joe Rogan 53:18 Oh, that dude. (laughs)

Shane Gillis 53:19 And they were like, "You're not Jewish," and he's like, "I meant Jew-ish. I'm like a Jew." (laughs)

Joe Rogan 53:24 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 53:24 He's like... (laughs)

Matt McCusker 53:24 He's a master of the English language.

Shane Gillis 53:25 Bro.

Matt McCusker 53:25 He's a master of the English language.

Shane Gillis 53:26 True.

Joe Rogan 53:26 He lied about so many things.

Shane Gillis 53:28 He lied about everything.

Joe Rogan 53:28 I found out about it on the podcast, and then I went on-

Shane Gillis 53:30 It's hilarious.

Joe Rogan 53:30 ... a deep dive. I'm like, "This guy's wild."

Shane Gillis 53:33 It's so funny.

Matt McCusker 53:33 Dude.

Shane Gillis 53:33 I found out, I was looking at him yesterday. The first article that came up was like, he lied about being a volleyball star. (laughs)

Matt McCusker 53:39 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 53:39 That's the funniest one.

Joe Rogan 53:40 Well, you ever see Biden lie about his education? Have you ever seen that clip?

Shane Gillis 53:44 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Joe Rogan 53:44 Where he lied about his education? They fact-checked him on the news.

Matt McCusker 53:47 What did he say he was?

Joe Rogan 53:49 Oh, my God. He just f- uh, flat-out lied about his credentials.

Shane Gillis 53:53 Yeah, I think it fucked him up in that debate. Or, or, uh...

Joe Rogan 53:55 Oh, for sure.

Shane Gillis 53:56 He was running a while ago, and he got-

Joe Rogan 53:58 Well, he ran for president in '88.

Shane Gillis 53:59 ... fucked up on... He, like, plagiarized his speech, he did that.

Matt McCusker 54:01 Oh.

Joe Rogan 54:02 Dude, we used to do Joe Biden night at Stitches Comedy Club from Boston-

Shane Gillis 54:05 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 54:05 ... where we'd all do each others' acts. That time Joe Biden lied about his academic credentials. So watch this video, 'cause it's fucking crazy.

Shane Gillis 54:12 He was 76 of 85. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 54:13 He was so silly.

Matt McCusker 54:15 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 54:15 I was in, I was in...

Matt McCusker 54:15 He might've got it wrong though. He might've been, like, 85 at the top.

Shane Gillis 54:18 Who knows? Truthfully, a guy who finishes 76 would get it wrong.

Joe Rogan 54:21 Well, that's the video.

Matt McCusker 54:22 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 54:22 It just says it's the road to the White House in 1988.

Joe Rogan 54:24 No, this is the video. I've seen it.

Matt McCusker 54:25 There it is.

Joe Rogan 54:26 He argues with this guy.

Narrator 54:27 And the other question is-

Shane Gillis 54:29 Who cares?

Narrator 54:29 ... could you quickly... I- I think we also-

54:31 I- I think I probably have a much higher IQ than you do. I suspect.

Shane Gillis 54:34 Beast.

Narrator 54:34 I went to law school on a full academic scholarship, the only one in my- in my class, uh, to have a full academic scholarship. And the first year in law school-

Shane Gillis 54:43 Ah.

Narrator 54:43 ... I decided I didn't want to be in law school and ended up in the bottom two-thirds of my class, and then decided I wanted to stay, went back to law school, and in fact ended up in the top half of my class. I won the international moot court competition. I was the outstanding student in the political science department at the end of my year. I graduated with three degrees from undergraduate school and 165 credits, only needed 123 credits.

Shane Gillis 55:05 (laughs)

Narrator 55:05 And I'd be delighted- ... to sit down and compare my IQ to yours, if you'd like, Frank.

55:08 Senator, can I-

Shane Gillis 55:09 You rewind that and look at the guy who wants to fuck him so bad?

Narrator 55:12 No, but no, let it go on. (laughs)

Shane Gillis 55:12 (laughs) Did you see how happy that guy was? He was like, "You're doing it, Joe." (laughs)

Narrator 55:16 I know.

55:16 Now, let me ask on my own... I am not questioning your IQ at all. I'm just saying that, with the people that we have elected to office in recent years- I think that we have to question their credentials very solidly.

55:26 Well, I think you're right, Frank.

55:28 ... damn.

55:29 We, but you know what I find kind of interesting? It seems to me, if you can speak, you're at a liability in the Democratic party anymore. Seems to me, you've all become heartless technocrats. It seems to me-

55:39 Hey, bro.

55:39 ... that you forget that what happens is, we've never as a party-

55:42 Okay, pause this.

55:43 ... we have never-

Joe Rogan 55:43 This is now nonsense.

Shane Gillis 55:44 Biden rules.

Narrator 55:45 Watch out, yeah.

Joe Rogan 55:45 Now, go to, uh-

Narrator 55:46 (laughs) That's pretty nasty, dude.

Shane Gillis 55:47 I fucking love Biden. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 55:48 Go to the, the article where it says what his actual stats were, 'cause someone fact-checked him on the news. It's not in that clip. There's one that they played that clip on the news and then fact-checked it.

Shane Gillis 55:56 That'd be a nice edit, like cutting that to, like, now him just fucking bumbling around- ... on stage talking nonsense as well.

Joe Rogan 56:02 He was actually 70th in a class of 85, so he wasn't in the top half. But there was a bunch of other stuff that he lied about in that clip too. The, the, in the, the news clip where they check it, this, uh, like, hardcore news guy goes, "Actually, the true story is..." And he just lays it all out and-

Shane Gillis 56:19 Oh, that blows.

Joe Rogan 56:20 (sighs) It sucks a fat one.

Narrator 56:20 Ah.

Joe Rogan 56:21 Imagine if you're lying and a dork comes in.

Shane Gillis 56:23 Yeah, yeah, there it is.

Narrator 56:23 Claiming to do, the new questions stem from taped remarks of Biden during an April campaign appearance in New Hampshire.

56:30 I went to law school on a full academic scholarship, the only one in my-

Joe Rogan 56:33 Yeah, scoot, scoot ahead a little to the, where he can't...

Shane Gillis 56:36 I can't get through that video.

Joe Rogan 56:36 Oh, okay. That's okay, keep playing it.

Shane Gillis 56:38 I don't know what it's on. That's crazy.

Narrator 56:38 ... my, in my class, uh, to have a full academic scholarship-

Joe Rogan 56:41 (laughs)

Narrator 56:41 ... went back to law school and in fact ended up in the top half of my class. I was the outstanding student in the political science department at the end of my year.

Shane Gillis 56:49 (laughs)

Narrator 56:49 I graduated with three degrees from undergraduate school and 165 credits, only needed 123 credits.

56:55 Biden now concedes he did not graduate in the top half of his law school class.

Shane Gillis 56:59 Oh.

Narrator 56:59 That he does not have three degrees from college, and that he was not named outstanding political science student in college. Newsweek says Biden actually went to school on a half scholarship, ended up near the bottom of his class, and won only one degree, not three. Joe Biden ranked 76th in a class of 85 at the University of Securi- Syracuse Law School. I mean, this guy comes off this whole thing as a flyweight. Now, Biden says Newsweek is right. His memory had failed him.

Shane Gillis 57:24 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 57:24 His memory, his memory had failed him.

Shane Gillis 57:26 Oh, no.

Joe Rogan 57:27 My memory had failed me.

Shane Gillis 57:28 '88, he was like, "I'm fucked up."

Joe Rogan 57:28 But his memory seems so good right there. It was like, the-

Shane Gillis 57:31 True. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 57:31 That'd be so scary if you could ra... Maybe that was the early signs of dementia.

Shane Gillis 57:35 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 57:35 You could rattle off facts that you think are fact.

Shane Gillis 57:38 Lies. Oh, boy. I'm fucked. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 57:39 Maybe he believed it. Maybe he believed it.

Shane Gillis 57:42 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 57:42 My memory failed me. Maybe his memory fails him all the time.

Shane Gillis 57:45 Maybe.

Joe Rogan 57:45 Maybe he's just, like, hanging on, just has a prepared speech for, "If Bob asks this or I say that," he has to write it all out.

Shane Gillis 57:50 Yeah, "I'm gonna ram it down his fucking throat."

Joe Rogan 57:52 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 57:52 The guy's like, "I think you're an idiot." He's like, "Actually, I got the highest IQ on Earth, motherfucker." Just-

Joe Rogan 57:57 (groans)

Shane Gillis 57:57 That does hurt when the dorks come after you, though.

Joe Rogan 57:59 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 57:59 And you're up there lying. Can you imagine if he did that?

Narrator 58:00 Well, especially the, those are the mainstream dorks.

Shane Gillis 58:03 Yeah.

Narrator 58:03 I mean, that was, uh, Sam Donald.

Shane Gillis 58:04 That was back in the day, the real dorks.

Narrator 58:06 Yeah, the real dorks.

Shane Gillis 58:06 The heavyweight dorks got him.

Narrator 58:08 The journalists.

Shane Gillis 58:08 Yeah.

Narrator 58:09 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 58:10 Jesus.

Joe Rogan 58:11 "I exaggerate when I'm angry, but I've never gone around telling people things that aren't true about me."

Shane Gillis 58:15 That's-

Joe Rogan 58:15 (laughs) That's not true.

Shane Gillis 58:15 ... an oxymoron. (laughs) You just lied right there.

Narrator 58:18 That's crazy.

Shane Gillis 58:18 I lie, but I never lie.

Joe Rogan 58:20 He just lied right there.

Shane Gillis 58:21 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 58:21 'Cause he lied. He said he had three degrees. That's not an exaggeration. That's a lie.

Shane Gillis 58:25 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 58:26 You know, saying-

Shane Gillis 58:27 That's-

Joe Rogan 58:27 ... you're in the top half of your class is also a lie.

Shane Gillis 58:30 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 58:30 It's exaggerating. If you say, "I fucking killed it in college."

Shane Gillis 58:33 Exactly.

Joe Rogan 58:34 But then they find out you were in the bottom half of the class. Well, that's an exaggeration.

Shane Gillis 58:36 Yeah. Yeah.

Joe Rogan 58:37 Well, that's kind of a lie too.

Shane Gillis 58:38 He could be like, "I was in a lot of clubs. I played, uh, you know, intramural sports." Yeah. But no, he fucking, he fucked it up.

Joe Rogan 58:44 He went for it.

Shane Gillis 58:44 He lied. And he called Black people super predators. And, uh... No, that was, uh, Hill Dog. He didn't, didn't he say that?

Joe Rogan 58:50 I think it was Hillary.

Shane Gillis 58:51 It was just Hillary?

Joe Rogan 58:51 I think it was him.

Narrator 58:52 He called them super predators too?

Shane Gillis 58:53 I think there's him on tape. I think he's been on tape.

Joe Rogan 58:54 Yeah.

Narrator 58:55 It was Biden.

Shane Gillis 58:55 He's had some rough ones. He had some rough ones.

Joe Rogan 58:56 I think they get these terms that they'd like to throw around, and then they start using them with each other. And it's, like, sort of a signal that we're all on the same page.

Shane Gillis 59:03 Oh, okay.

Joe Rogan 59:04 And, you know, whatever it is, whatever term they're using to try to push things across. Hillary Clinton, not Joe Biden-

Shane Gillis 59:09 Oh.

Joe Rogan 59:10 ... used the term super predator. Damn-

Shane Gillis 59:11 Reuters.

Joe Rogan 59:11 ... son.

Shane Gillis 59:12 Let's go.

Joe Rogan 59:13 Let's go.

Shane Gillis 59:13 Jamie, Jamie. This makes up for the lack of, uh-

Joe Rogan 59:15 Let's go.

Shane Gillis 59:15 ... Dog general info.

Joe Rogan 59:16 (laughs)

Shane Gillis 59:16 Joe Biden, let's go. Um, yeah. Hillary, boy. Whew.

Narrator 59:22 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 59:23 I know women want a, a female president. We got one in Tulsi Gabbard. Go, go get her.

Narrator 59:27 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 59:28 That's one, that's one that you could really get behind. But- Who do you like, Matt?

Joe Rogan 59:31 Uh, in terms of?

Shane Gillis 59:32 Who are you trying to endorse?

Joe Rogan 59:33 I want Yang, dude.

Shane Gillis 59:34 Yang's a beast. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 59:35 I hope he starts it. I just want a new po- I don't care what he does. I just want a new party to win. Be fun to just, like, knock the other shit up.

Shane Gillis 59:42 You were Yang gang early.

Joe Rogan 59:43 Yeah, I like the idea of just fucking-

Shane Gillis 59:44 You liked UBI at first.

Joe Rogan 59:46 You like universal basic income?

Shane Gillis 59:46 What, are you a communist? (laughs)

Joe Rogan 59:48 No, I thought it was a cool idea. Try it.

Shane Gillis 59:49 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 59:49 I might think it's just try... We should do wild experiments, just try it out.

Shane Gillis 59:52 Dude, I thought it was a t- cool idea until people started getting money during the pandemic and they didn't want to go back to work.

Joe Rogan 59:57 Ah, yeah.

Shane Gillis 59:57 And I was like, "Oh, no, this is what happens."

Joe Rogan 59:59 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 59:59 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 59:59 Then you try to go to Starbucks at a rest stop.

Narrator 1:00:01 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 1:00:01 Yeah, you'd have a collapse of the service industry.

Shane Gillis 1:00:03 One person. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 1:00:03 You'd colla- collapse of jobs that suck.

Shane Gillis 1:00:05 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 1:00:06 But you would also have a resurgence of people doing what they actually want to do. It wouldn't be everybody, but it would give a good chunk of people an opportunity to try something that they've always wanted to do, where they don't have to worry about subsistence, right? They don't have to worry about food and rent.

Shane Gillis 1:00:21 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 1:00:21 And then they can go pursue a dream. But how many are gonna do that? I don't know. Is it worth trying? It might be. I don't know. I mean, but human nature, the problem with, with... Human nature, like people, if you give them stuff and make them so they don't have to do anything, they don't do things.

Shane Gillis 1:00:36 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 1:00:36 That's a l- a lot of people. But a lot of people wouldn't. They would look at it as an opportunity. It's like, it's almost like you need to educate peoples, like, what gives you meaning in life. And I know being lazy is, like, very attractive. It's, it's, it, it draws you to it. It's so comfortable to just sit on the couch and play video games and do nothing, but you're gonna get depressed.

Shane Gillis 1:00:56 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 1:00:56 You're gonna get depressed.

Shane Gillis 1:00:58 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 1:00:59 You, you need a task. I, I don't... I think everybody needs a different task, and everybody has, like, a different level of need, but you need tasks.

Shane Gillis 1:01:06 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 1:01:06 Yeah.

Shane Gillis 1:01:07 For-

Joe Rogan 1:01:07 This is emotion. This is just me speaking.

Shane Gillis 1:01:07 Yeah, but have you played Bannerlord? Have you played Bannerlord?

Joe Rogan 1:01:10 Dude, if I played games, man-

Shane Gillis 1:01:12 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 1:01:12 ... I'd have a fucking problem. Jamie can tell you, I have a problem.

Shane Gillis 1:01:16 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 1:01:16 I get psychotically obsessed.

Shane Gillis 1:01:18 Bannerlord is so nice.

Joe Rogan 1:01:18 And I p- I will play eight, 10