Joe Rogan Experience #1948 - Tony Hinchcliffe & Brian Redban

Tony Hinchcliffe is a stand-up comedian, writer, and actor. He's also the co-host, along with Brian Redban, of the podcast and live-streaming YouTube show "Kill Tony." Brian Redban is a comedian, producer, and founder of the Deathsquad podcast network.

Tony HinchcliffeguestBrian RedbanguestJoe Roganhost

Jun 27, 20242h 35mWatch on YouTube ↗

EVERY SPOKEN WORD

150 min read · 30,001 words

0:00 – 15:00
(drum roll) Joe Rogan podcast,…
1. THTony Hinchcliffe
  (drum roll) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.
2. BRBrian Redban
  The Joe Rogan Experience. (drum roll)
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. (rock music) Brian, you got every kind of caffeinated beverage known to man in front of you. What do you got? I got a smoothie and Black Rifle. Two Black Rifles, and then you got a cooler. Oh, this is Liquid IV. Oh, look at you. (laughs) Trying to stay hydrated. I got all... I got Factor, I got Liquid I... I got all the sponsors. You've remained remarkably healthy. (laughs) Out of all the people I was worried about during COVID, it was you. I was worried about you and Tim Dillon. You were my number one and number two, but you fucking coasted through it like it was nothing. (laughs) Yeah. It's weird. (laughs) I, I... My doctor said I have this thing where my, my meta- my, my metabolism is too strong, uh, and it's, like, fucking my gums up right now. Like- Your metabolism is fucking your gums up? Yeah. What kind of doctor you going to? A chiropractor?
4. THTony Hinchcliffe
  (laughs)
5. You going to a witch doctor?
6. JRJoe Rogan
  No. I, I, I've actually been to, like, all the... Two dent- dentists now, because I'm dealing with it right now. My met- uh, it's fucking... My gums are, like gum disease type shit. Receding gums?
7. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Yeah.
8. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. And so I have to get a deep clean, but, um, they're... They let me use nitrous for the first time at a doctor.
9. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Ooh.
10. JRJoe Rogan
  I've never done that. Have you done nitrous at a doctor?
11. THTony Hinchcliffe
  It's fun.
12. JRJoe Rogan
  Really?
13. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Yeah.
14. JRJoe Rogan
  How silly did you get? You haven't done it yet? I haven't done it yet. (laughs)
15. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Yeah.
16. JRJoe Rogan
  Have you done it?
17. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Yeah, and I ended up, like, being mean to the dentist.
18. JRJoe Rogan
  No.
19. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Like, I was, like, making jokes that weren't funny. Like, nobody was laughing.
20. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, no.
21. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Yeah.
22. JRJoe Rogan
  That's what I'm scared of, 'cause, you know, in college, you do it, and you fall out a window, you start, like- (laughs) ... fishing around and shit. How are you gonna do that at a dentist's when they're trying to be precise with your teeth? That's a good point, right? Like, you gotta take a wild chance that the person isn't out of their fucking mind if you're gonna dose them up with nitrous. I don't know what it feels like. Is that the same thing with whip-its? Oh, we can find out real quick. It is. It's medical grade. We have them here.
23. THTony Hinchcliffe
  (laughs)
24. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, Ari did whip-its on the show. We were like, "What are you doing?" I was like, "Is this even legal?" No.
25. THTony Hinchcliffe
  (laughs)
26. JRJoe Rogan
  He has... He bought them somewhere. Like, you can buy whip-its? You could buy it for, for the, those machines for the whipped cream.
27. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Whip-its for whipped cream.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
29. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Yeah, it's just whipped cream.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  That's what they call it? Yeah.
15:00 – 30:00
Yeah. …
1. JRJoe Rogan
  wearing his own shirt.
2. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Yeah.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Essentially narced on himself. He's wearing a mask. He's g- ... He gets away free.
4. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Mm-hmm.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  Without that, he gets away free.
6. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Yeah.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
8. THTony Hinchcliffe
  He loses his mind. In the end he leaves them, these voi- ... He leaves a voicemail.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, no.
10. THTony Hinchcliffe
  'Cause there's a number on the cart narc thing.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  What did you ... Your thought ... I never watched Windy City Heat.
12. THTony Hinchcliffe
  What?
13. JRJoe Rogan
  I always thought ... Yeah, I was like, "It's too mean."
14. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Oh.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  Too mean to do that to a guy.
16. THTony Hinchcliffe
  No. He wanted that. That's what he wanted.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  I know, but he's an insane person.
18. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Yeah.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  You ... Do you think you could do that today? Do you think the same people involved? Do you think Jimmy Kimmel could be involved in something like that today?
20. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Hell no. None of them would be involved. Not Carson Daly.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Isn't that crazy?
22. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Not any of them. They couldn't-
23. JRJoe Rogan
  Isn't that crazy? 'Cause that's what kinda got him to the dance.
24. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Mm-hmm. Yeah.
25. JRJoe Rogan
  That kind of comedy. Man show comedy for Kimmel.
26. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Yeah.
27. JRJoe Rogan
  It's funny that they, they could never do that.
28. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Bobcat wouldn't do it.
29. JRJoe Rogan
  Bobcat directed it. Oh, yeah. Uh, Bobcat might still do it.
30. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Dane Cook's in it.
30:00 – 45:00
Oh, yeah. …
1. JRJoe Rogan
  who's bald.
2. BRBrian Redban
  Oh, yeah.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Has a beard and a mustache.
4. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  And is apparently a kleptomaniac.
6. BRBrian Redban
  Yep.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  It is the wildest story.
8. BRBrian Redban
  Yeah.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  They caught her stealing a bag. I should say... Is it he? Like, he has a mustache. Um, stealing a... Isn't his name Sam?
10. BRBrian Redban
  I think it's-
11. JRJoe Rogan
  I don't wanna misgender. I'm not sure if it's, like, non-binary. Whatever. It's-
12. BRBrian Redban
  But whatever it is, it's a thief.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  Try to be nice. It's a fucking thief (laughs) . It's a fucking terrible thief. And then there was a woman who, uh, recently, uh, f- saw photos of this Sam person. And, uh, she is, like... I think she's a designer, and she had very specific, one-of-a-kind clothing-... that had gotten stolen.
14. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Oh, shit.
15. BRBrian Redban
  Jesus. What the hell?
16. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, it's w- it's playing with rules.
17. THTony Hinchcliffe
  There's not enough-
18. JRJoe Rogan
  That's what that person is doing.
19. THTony Hinchcliffe
  There-
20. JRJoe Rogan
  That person with the beard and the shaved head, and, uh, g- lipstick, and every- they're, they're playing with the rules.
21. THTony Hinchcliffe
  I'll tell you, there's not enough boner pills in the world. (laughs)
22. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs) Oh, man.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  So this person, Sam, uh, has been stealing women's luggage. Like, not just one, but they've, they've caught multiple times this person, Sam, on video, stealing luggage. And this woman, who said, uh, from 2018... See if you can find that story. The story of this woman who was a designer, from 2018.
24. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Yeah. There it is.
25. JRJoe Rogan
  So, she had these very specific pieces that were missing, and then she sees this person wearing her shit. This person who works for the fucking White House.
26. BRBrian Redban
  What's he do at the White House?
27. JRJoe Rogan
  And she's like, "No way." Well, she's, he, they are fired.
28. BRBrian Redban
  Oh.
29. JRJoe Rogan
  They are fired from the White House.
30. BRBrian Redban
  What did they do?
45:00 – 1:00:00
Mm-hmm. …
1. JRJoe Rogan
  and no one's doing anything to stop that. No one's doing anything to try to help. That's the real problem in- in this country. It's- it's not like ... M- most people don't give a fuck who you are. They don't g- they just like you to be good at what you do and they like you to be fun to be around.
2. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Mm-hmm.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  We all find each other's groove. Like, "Oh, this is Mike. He's- he's a fucking weirdo, but he's cool about this." And we, you know, we all find our groove with each other. You know how many comics do we know that are gay? Nobody gives a shit.
4. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Right.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  How many comics do we know (clears throat) that are of every ethnicity, every race? It's w- w- when you're hanging around with comics, it's just who's funny.
6. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Right.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  It's just who's good, who's cool to hang with. Nobody gives a fuck about that. That should be the whole world. That should be the whole world. I don't know if you get there by forcing people to get hired because they're a certain race or a certain gender or a certain anything.
8. THTony Hinchcliffe
  I mean-
9. JRJoe Rogan
  So you gotta get it to the point where all these people have the same sort of crack at it. So then it just becomes a meritocracy, like a real meritocracy 'cause it's a ... That's the- the argument against it. It's like it's not a meritocra- meritocracy if people experience racism or sexism or if people grow up, uh, you know, uh, disenfranchised and they grow up in bad a- bad areas. Like they deserve like a little bit of an extra help and maybe they should be hired first. This is the way the ... That's the thought process behind it, but ... Well, I- I think that encourages like someone who's not as good to succeed.
10. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Right.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  And I don't think that's good for anybody.
12. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Right.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  I think the best people should succeed. We just have to figure out like how to make that fair. But the best people should s- should succeed in everything. That's the way we get better at stuff. That's it.
14. THTony Hinchcliffe
  The NFL, I'm sure you probably know about this, but they have a very, very interesting thing that they're doing where you literally get better ... What is it? Draft picks or something based on, uh, how many Black coaches you have instead of ... So you can literally reconstruct your team. You can build it stronger. Is it draft picks or is it-
15. JRJoe Rogan
  And so you get more draft picks.
16. THTony Hinchcliffe
  ... s- a bigger salary cap or something? It's- it's- Ooh.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  ... it's wild.
18. THTony Hinchcliffe
  You-
19. JRJoe Rogan
  The salary cap is wild 'cause if there wasn't a salary cap, the Saudis would just come in.
20. THTony Hinchcliffe
  (laughs)
21. JRJoe Rogan
  And then we go ... (laughs) We have a- we have an idea. (laughs)
22. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Yeah.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  Everybody, a billion dollars.
24. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Yeah.
25. JRJoe Rogan
  They just fucking just buy up ... Like I think those guys have more money than we could possibly comprehend.
26. THTony Hinchcliffe
  They're doing it with golf, that LIV.
27. JRJoe Rogan
  And like l- it seems to be working.
28. THTony Hinchcliffe
  Yep. Mm-hmm.
29. JRJoe Rogan
  Is it? No? Jamie? Shaky shaky?
30. BRBrian Redban
  Well ...
1:00:00 – 1:12:37
Brigham sent me a…
1. JRJoe Rogan
  the time. Bro. Fuck.
2. BRBrian Redban
  Brigham sent me a meme that was like, "If you wanna run a train properly, here's who you should hire," and it's that cop lady that got...
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, yeah. (laughs)
4. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs) Yeah, I've seen those. She's in, like, 10 memes. Poor gal.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs) Yeah.
6. BRBrian Redban
  Good girl.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, she's-
8. BRBrian Redban
  (sighs) What are you gonna do?
9. JRJoe Rogan
  ... cold-blooded assassin.
10. BRBrian Redban
  She went-
11. JRJoe Rogan
  Yep.
12. BRBrian Redban
  It's a fun office mate right there.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  Yep.
14. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs)
15. JRJoe Rogan
  Seems like they were having a good time on the job.
16. BRBrian Redban
  Give me three black rhinos and an eight-hour shift.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
18. BRBrian Redban
  (laughs) It's too much. Let's go.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  Three, you'll have a heart attack, bro.
20. BRBrian Redban
  You'll die. (laughs)
21. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, you gotta be careful. (laughs) How many people died from rhino pills?
22. BRBrian Redban
  Probably a lot.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  We should find that out.
24. BRBrian Redban
  That's a good question.
25. JRJoe Rogan
  Let's take a guess. Because, you know they've got... If... It, it would, it'd be... have to be, like, someone-
26. BRBrian Redban
  Heart attacks.
27. JRJoe Rogan
  Some banker's son died from r- rhino pills, and then they would ban them. So, it would have to be someone influential who died.
28. BRBrian Redban
  Mm-hmm.
29. JRJoe Rogan
  Like, I would... Well, I'm gonna guess... (smacks lips) It's hard to say.
30. BRBrian Redban
  I don't think there's a number for that, because it pretty much is like whatever that boner pill really is, like Viagra.

Episode duration: 2:35:12

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(drum roll) Joe Rogan podcast,…

Yeah. …

Oh, yeah. …

Mm-hmm. …

Brigham sent me a…

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