Joe Rogan Experience #2050 - Ehsan Ahmad

1. 0:00 – 15:00

   (drumming music) Joe Rogan podcast,…

   1. NANarrator0:00

      (drumming music) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out. The Joe Rogan Experience.

   2. JRJoe Rogan0:06

      Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. (rock music) What's up, brother?

   3. EAEhsan Ahmad0:14

      Hey.

   4. JRJoe Rogan0:14

      How you doing?

   5. EAEhsan Ahmad0:15

      Good, good to-

   6. JRJoe Rogan0:16

      Good to see ya.

   7. EAEhsan Ahmad0:16

      ... see ya. Glad to be here.

   8. JRJoe Rogan0:17

      Glad to have you, finally, man.

   9. EAEhsan Ahmad0:19

      (laughs)

   10. JRJoe Rogan0:19

       Dude, I was probably around... When, when did you first, when was your first time on stage?

   11. EAEhsan Ahmad0:23

       My first time on stage was, um, in this place called Tommy T's in Livermore, California.

   12. JRJoe Rogan0:30

       Oh, I know that place.

   13. EAEhsan Ahmad0:31

       Yeah, yeah.

   14. JRJoe Rogan0:32

       Yeah.

   15. EAEhsan Ahmad0:32

       It was a, it was an open mic at 2012, end of 2012.

   16. JRJoe Rogan0:37

       Wow.

   17. EAEhsan Ahmad0:37

       Early 2013. Yeah, that's when I started. And I remember going up on stage. My first joke kinda hit, and I bombed the whole time.

   18. JRJoe Rogan0:46

       (laughs)

   19. EAEhsan Ahmad0:46

       But that one little hit was enough. It was enough to-

   20. JRJoe Rogan0:50

       Do you remember what it was?

   21. EAEhsan Ahmad0:51

       Yeah. Oh, my name is Hasan Ahmad, and I know that's very 9/11-y.

   22. JRJoe Rogan0:54

       (laughs)

   23. EAEhsan Ahmad0:54

       That was my opening (laughs) that was my opening line in comedy.

   24. JRJoe Rogan0:59

       Wow.

   25. EAEhsan Ahmad1:00

       Yeah.

   26. JRJoe Rogan1:01

       So I probably met you around 2014 then.

   27. EAEhsan Ahmad1:04

       2015 is when we met.

   28. JRJoe Rogan1:06

       Okay.

   29. EAEhsan Ahmad1:06

       Yeah, I, uh, and this is a story I tell to all the door guys on what it's like to be a door guy at a, at a comedy club, 'cause this is the first time we've ever had a conversation. I was sitting by the back door, and you had just stopped, and this is something that you just talked to like all the new guys. I've noticed that you do that, you know? And then you were showing me your phone and telling me your process on how you write and how you listen to every single set as you drove back home after the store, and you talked to me for like 20 minutes. And then you left, and Curtis came up to me, and it was like, "Hey, so someone pooped in the bathroom and missed."

   30. JRJoe Rogan1:39

       (laughs)
2. 15:00 – 30:00

   They're heading that ball.…

   1. JRJoe Rogan15:00

      which you wouldn't think get head injuries, but-

   2. GUGuest15:02

      They're heading that ball.

   3. JRJoe Rogan15:03

      ... they head the ball all the time.

   4. GUGuest15:04

      Mm-hmm.

   5. JRJoe Rogan15:04

      And sometimes they collide with each other too. That can happen too. You know, I've had head injuries from collisions in jujitsu, just accidental collisions. Like someone will knee you in the face accidentally and fucking ring your bell.

   6. GUGuest15:16

      Right.

   7. JRJoe Rogan15:17

      And guys have gotten knocked out in the gym totally accidentally. You know, just you zig when you should've zagged, a guy's moving towards you and you're moving towards him and your chin collides with the top of his head and you just go unconscious. Happens.

   8. GUGuest15:30

      (laughs)

   9. JRJoe Rogan15:30

      Yeah. So I've been, I've, I don't know how many concussions I've had in my life.

   10. GUGuest15:35

       Oh, really?

   11. JRJoe Rogan15:36

       I have no idea.

   12. GUGuest15:37

       That's a lot.

   13. JRJoe Rogan15:37

       Like from the time I was 15 till I was 21, I sparred a lot.

   14. GUGuest15:41

       Mm-hmm.

   15. JRJoe Rogan15:42

       I did a lot of sparring. And when I really started getting fucked up was when I started kickboxing sparring, 'cause I wasn't good at boxing. I was a good kicker 'cause I was, like, a TaeKwonDo champion. And then I went into kickboxing. "Oh, my god. These guys are fucking me up." I was getting beat up by, like, good kickboxers.

   16. GUGuest15:56

       Are you taking, like, kicks to the face?

   17. JRJoe Rogan15:58

       No.

   18. GUGuest15:58

       No?

   19. JRJoe Rogan15:58

       I'd fuck them up with kicks.

   20. GUGuest16:00

       Okay.

   21. JRJoe Rogan16:00

       If I could get in kick distance, I was much better than them.

   22. GUGuest16:02

       Hm.

   23. JRJoe Rogan16:03

       But-

   24. GUGuest16:03

       But they got close to you.

   25. JRJoe Rogan16:04

       ... the thing with kickboxing is, there's boxing involved and my boxing was terrible. I was just learning boxing.

   26. GUGuest16:08

       Mm-hmm.

   27. JRJoe Rogan16:09

       I had a very delusional idea of how good I could use my hands 'cause I was good at TaeKwonDo. And TaeKwonDo has some punches, but not much. And I knew how to punch things hard, but I didn't really know how to box at all.

   28. GUGuest16:19

       Right. Like the-

   29. JRJoe Rogan16:19

       So, yeah.

   30. GUGuest16:20

       ... like the defensive positions and all that sort of stuff?
3. 30:00 – 45:00

   Yeah. …

   1. EAEhsan Ahmad30:00

      their... I stayed in their place for a little bit, two weeks, and I was like, "Oh, I gotta come." I gotta come 'cause at the worst, I come out here and get stage time in front of people.

   2. JRJoe Rogan30:07

      Yeah.

   3. EAEhsan Ahmad30:08

      At the worst.

   4. JRJoe Rogan30:09

      When you first came here, was I even talking about opening a club yet?

   5. EAEhsan Ahmad30:13

      Yes. So, for me, what made it real that you were opening the club is that I heard Adam and Kurtis were coming over, and I was like, "Oh, he's serious about opening the club."

   6. JRJoe Rogan30:24

      Yeah.

   7. EAEhsan Ahmad30:24

      There's no, like... There's no, like... 'Cause you heard... I heard the news, and I was like, "Oh, am I gonna have to move to Austin?" And then you hired those two, and I was like, "Oh, this is happening." And then my friends were also be like, "Hey, you gotta come out here. There is time, and you can get good out here."

   8. JRJoe Rogan30:36

      Well, everybody was a... It was a perfect storm-

   9. EAEhsan Ahmad30:38

      Mm-hmm.

   10. JRJoe Rogan30:38

       ... of LA closing down.

   11. EAEhsan Ahmad30:40

       Mm-hmm.

   12. JRJoe Rogan30:40

       The Comedy Store, they- they're closed down, so everyone's out of work.

   13. EAEhsan Ahmad30:43

       Mm-hmm.

   14. JRJoe Rogan30:43

       So, all those people didn't have jobs anymore.

   15. EAEhsan Ahmad30:45

       Mm-hmm.

   16. JRJoe Rogan30:45

       And so I said, "I'll hire you now. And you don't have a job for like a year and a half, but you start getting paid immediately."

   17. EAEhsan Ahmad30:51

       (laughs) That's a good deal.

   18. JRJoe Rogan30:53

       It's like... Well, I was like, "Listen, man, I'm gonna make it as nice and easy as possible." I was like, "Come to Austin. Get... Enjoy the city for a year."

   19. EAEhsan Ahmad31:01

       Mm-hmm.

   20. JRJoe Rogan31:01

       "And then we'll call for you. And then we'll do this."

   21. EAEhsan Ahmad31:04

       Mm-hmm.

   22. JRJoe Rogan31:04

       "We'll really do this."

   23. EAEhsan Ahmad31:05

       Yeah. And then it was-

   24. JRJoe Rogan31:06

       Yeah.

   25. EAEhsan Ahmad31:06

       And then it opened, and you could just feel it immediately.

   26. JRJoe Rogan31:08

       I didn't think it was gonna take as long as it took, but that was because we had another building and the- the building owned by the cult, and that- that shit fell apart.

   27. EAEhsan Ahmad31:15

       (laughs)

   28. JRJoe Rogan31:15

       But it... Lucky it fell apart, man, because it's like where we got is the best spot in the world. That 6th Street is like no other place, man. It's just hopping with people. They close it down to car traffic, and there's just people walking on the streets, and the energy is crazy.

   29. EAEhsan Ahmad31:31

       Right. (laughs) It's pretty... Uh, the energy at 6th Street is nuts.

   30. JRJoe Rogan31:34

       Yeah.
4. 45:00 – 1:00:00

   Wow. …

   1. GUGuest45:00

      1977. Worldwide propaganda network built by the CIA.

   2. EAEhsan Ahmad45:04

      Wow.

   3. JRJoe Rogan45:04

      Wow.

   4. EAEhsan Ahmad45:04

      I can't even imagine.

   5. JRJoe Rogan45:05

      1977.

   6. GUGuest45:07

      I don't... I mean, I didn't, I can't find the article really, but it's just, um-

   7. JRJoe Rogan45:10

      It's so hard to know what's real and what's not real.

   8. EAEhsan Ahmad45:13

      There's, yeah. That's, I think that's li- like where we talked about what the shift in COVID, what it really caused.

   9. JRJoe Rogan45:17

      Mm-hmm.

   10. EAEhsan Ahmad45:17

       It's like now I'm just suspicious of everything.

   11. JRJoe Rogan45:19

       Everything.

   12. EAEhsan Ahmad45:20

       Of everything. Everything I read, I'm like, "Who, what's that?"

   13. JRJoe Rogan45:23

       Yeah.

   14. EAEhsan Ahmad45:23

       "What, what angle is it coming from? Who's funding this?"

   15. JRJoe Rogan45:26

       Exactly. Exactly. And not, it didn't used to be that way, man.

   16. GUGuest45:28

       So this is what comes up about what we were just talking about, though.

   17. JRJoe Rogan45:31

       "Obama did not sign a law allowing propaganda in the US." Okay, so here's the claim. "Former President Barack Obama signed a law in 2012 allowing the government to propaganda, all- allowing government propaganda in the US and making it perfectly legal for the media to purposely lie to the American people."

   18. EAEhsan Ahmad45:47

       (laughs)

   19. JRJoe Rogan45:47

       AP's assessment, false. "In 2013, Obama signed legislation that changed the US Information and Education Exchange Act of 1948, also known as the Smith-Mundt Act. The amendment made it possible for some materials created by the US Agency for Global Media, the nation's foreign broadcasting agency, to be disseminated in the US." The facts. "A post circulating on Facebook with a photo of Obama falsely states that he repealed a ban on government propaganda in the US when he signed the National Defense Authorization Act in 2013. The amendment did not repeal the Smith-Mundt Act, but rather lifted some restrictions on the domestic dissemination of government-funded media." Okay. Government-funded media, though, is you're getting close to propaganda, right? Okay, so here. "The change essentially eased restrictions for Americans who wanted to access government-funded media." (laughs)

   20. EAEhsan Ahmad46:42

       (laughs)

   21. JRJoe Rogan46:42

       But more gaslight-

   22. EAEhsan Ahmad46:43

       We're doing it for you.

   23. JRJoe Rogan46:44

       Did Ted Sarandos write this?

   24. EAEhsan Ahmad46:45

       We're making... (laughs) We're making it easier for you to access it.

   25. JRJoe Rogan46:48

       "The change essentially eased restrictions for Americans who wanted to access government-funded media content." 'Cause, you know, uh, most Americans really wanna access-

   26. EAEhsan Ahmad46:56

       Right.

   27. JRJoe Rogan46:56

       ... government-funded media content.

   28. EAEhsan Ahmad46:58

       (laughs)

   29. JRJoe Rogan46:59

       Al- allow-

   30. EAEhsan Ahmad46:59

       I can't think of anything better. Would I rather watch Game of Thrones-
5. 1:00:00 – 1:05:38

   Mm-hmm. …

   1. JRJoe Rogan1:00:00

      fucking competitive energy that you used to get, particularly in the '90s, man. When I first came to The Store, it was, God, it was so dog eat dog.

   2. EAEhsan Ahmad1:00:08

      Mm-hmm.

   3. JRJoe Rogan1:00:08

      'Cause everybody was trying to get on a sitcom.

   4. EAEhsan Ahmad1:00:10

      Mm-hmm.

   5. JRJoe Rogan1:00:10

      And if you and I both went on an audition for a sitcom, and you got it, I would be like, "Goddamn it."

   6. EAEhsan Ahmad1:00:16

      Right.

   7. JRJoe Rogan1:00:16

      "Now his life has changed. I see you on TV Guide now. This motherfucker."

   8. EAEhsan Ahmad1:00:21

      Right. Mm-hmm.

   9. JRJoe Rogan1:00:21

      "Like he's living the good life, and I'm over here grinding at 11:30 sets."

   10. EAEhsan Ahmad1:00:26

       Yeah, trying to, trying to get someone to look at me.

   11. JRJoe Rogan1:00:28

       "In the OR." Yeah, in front of 50 people. "I can't get an agent. Fuck!"

   12. EAEhsan Ahmad1:00:32

       Right.

   13. JRJoe Rogan1:00:32

       You know? And so there was this, like, hypercompetitiveness amongst comedians, where people ... And it's all th- the bad mindsets. They had this idea that somehow or another, if you got something, and it, it was good for you, it was somehow another taking away from my success.

   14. EAEhsan Ahmad1:00:47

       Mm-hmm.

   15. JRJoe Rogan1:00:47

       It's really stupid. But it was all because of the fact that everybody was clamoring for a tiny amount of jobs.

   16. EAEhsan Ahmad1:00:52

       Well, i- yeah, it seemed like back then, the industry held the keys.

   17. JRJoe Rogan1:00:55

       They did. They did.

   18. EAEhsan Ahmad1:00:56

       Yeah, they really held the keys. And now, it doesn't feel like that at all.

   19. JRJoe Rogan1:01:00

       At all.

   20. EAEhsan Ahmad1:01:00

       At all.

   21. JRJoe Rogan1:01:00

       No, at all.

   22. EAEhsan Ahmad1:01:00

       It's like you can just do, yeah, you can just do what you want. (laughs)

   23. JRJoe Rogan1:01:02

       Yeah.

   24. EAEhsan Ahmad1:01:02

       That's the best part-

   25. JRJoe Rogan1:01:03

       Yeah.

   26. EAEhsan Ahmad1:01:03

       ... is that I'm not, that, you know ... Y- you don't, if you, if you come here, you don't have to worry about, like, "Oh, if I say this, will I not get this job?"

   27. JRJoe Rogan1:01:10

       Right.

   28. EAEhsan Ahmad1:01:11

       Right? I can just, I can just talk about what's, like, on my mind.

   29. JRJoe Rogan1:01:14

       Yeah. You can do whatever you want.

   30. EAEhsan Ahmad1:01:15

       Right. That's a, that's a level of freedom that, you know. And I, uh, uh, and I do wonder if may- you know, of, I mean, 'cause eventually industry and stuff are gonna start coming here. If, like, the ...

Episode duration: 2:27:38