Joe Rogan Experience #2087 - Ron White

Ron White is a stand-up comic, actor, and author. He is also back on tour, with all available dates at: www.tatersalad.com

Joe RoganhostRon Whiteguest

Jun 27, 20243h 3mWatch on YouTube ↗

EVERY SPOKEN WORD

150 min read · 30,058 words

0:00 – 1:58
Studio puppy chaos, micro Goldendoodles, and dogs’ wolf origins
1. NANarrator
  (drum roll) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.
2. The Joe Rogan Experience.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. (rock music) Rob White has brought a wandering puppy into the studio and she's tangled in the wires now.
4. RWRon White
  Yeah. You know what? We can just put her out there. There's a ... They got new puppies out there.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
6. RWRon White
  Let's just put her outside. There's-
7. JRJoe Rogan
  That's-
8. RWRon White
  She doesn't need to be around these wires.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  Let's, let's have her do that and play with the puppy.
10. RWRon White
  Yeah, she'll do that.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  How old is she, six months?
12. RWRon White
  Six months.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  She's adorable. What's her name again?
14. RWRon White
  Maddie.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
16. RWRon White
  She's, uh, like a rug that shits.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
18. RWRon White
  She's ... (laughs) That's what she is, man.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  She's a little, adorable little-
20. RWRon White
  She's a-
21. JRJoe Rogan
  ... cutie pie.
22. RWRon White
  ... Golden Doodle. Micro Goldendoodles, what they're calling 'em.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  Micro Goldendoodles?
24. RWRon White
  Yeah. So that's about how big she's supposed to be.
25. JRJoe Rogan
  That's it?
26. RWRon White
  She's a-
27. JRJoe Rogan
  That's as big as they get?
28. RWRon White
  That one's supposed to. I hope so.
29. JRJoe Rogan
  Isn't that weird?
30. RWRon White
  I still gotta cram 'em on planes and shit when I would travel.
1:58 – 7:31
Tour-bus life in high winds: safety, drivers, and never touching the cockpit
1. RWRon White
  Yeah, it is. I'm, I'm up in the air on the 22nd floor. I'm still living-
2. JRJoe Rogan
  Whoo.
3. RWRon White
  ... in the condo. It is breezy up there.
4. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. Boy, you open up that sliding glass door, you get a taste of-
5. RWRon White
  Woo.
6. JRJoe Rogan
  ... reality.
7. RWRon White
  (laughs) You know, when a couple of days ago, we could barely shut it, you know, or, or open it. It was just so much pressure against it. We were in Midland on Wednesday, or Thursday night to do a show thanks to you. If you'd have just let me retire-
8. JRJoe Rogan
  Duh. (laughs)
9. RWRon White
  ... I wouldn't have been in Midland in a m- But I'm sitting on my bus, my 60,000-pound tour bus, and it is shaking in the wind. It is blowing so hard and I've owned that bus 17 years. I've never felt anything like this and it just shaking. And that, the bus driver had to drive it from there to Houston for the next night's show. He got up at ... 10 hours later of just wrastling that steering wheel trying to keep that thing on the road.
10. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh my God.
11. RWRon White
  His shoulders were killing him, his back was sore. I mean, it looked like he'd been in a fight all night long, 10 hours.
12. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, I think of what a, a bus is such a big target for wind too. There's so much surface area.
13. RWRon White
  A big old sail.
14. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
15. RWRon White
  And, uh, but luckily, they weigh a lot. So they're 60,000 pounds and, and, uh, you know, so it's pretty stable compared to a trailer, right, that, that somebody's pulling.
16. JRJoe Rogan
  Right.
17. RWRon White
  There's no weight in that. All that weight's-
18. JRJoe Rogan
  Right.
19. RWRon White
  ... right here. That stuff really blows around worse than we do.
20. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, I would imagine.
21. RWRon White
  We've got weight distribution. I know-
22. JRJoe Rogan
  Just the whole trailer thing being connected.
23. RWRon White
  I know all about this shit. If you wanna know any of it, just ask me questions.
24. JRJoe Rogan
  Okay.
25. RWRon White
  All right, I'm gonna think of-
26. JRJoe Rogan
  The hinge-
27. RWRon White
  ... think of something.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  ... between the two trailers, if something goes sideways, I would imagine that would be a lot harder to get back on track.
29. RWRon White
  I don't know Jack Shit about that.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
7:31 – 9:38
Highway psychology, road rage, and what roads say about a civilization
1. JRJoe Rogan
  If we wanted to look at the bright side of human beings, highways are a pretty good indicator. That, that people for the most part keep it together. For the most part.
2. RWRon White
  I think that's really how you can really tell when you're back in America and how good we are at, at putting a country together, you know, is how good our roads are compared to... You know, you, it's really funny, if you cross the bridge from, uh, Reynosa, Mexico to McAllen, Texas, which I used to do all the time, it was a joint project. So the US built half the bridge and Mexico built half the bridge. And I'm not being a racist and I love Mexican people, I just got back from Mexico City, but our side of the bridge is smooth as silk and as soon as you hit that river, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. But that just goes to what you just said, it's a, it's a mark of what you've achieved as a, as a, as a civilization, the kind of road work that you've got. And you get back to Texas where we got those U-turn lanes on the freeway.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
4. RWRon White
  We got it figured out here in Texas, man. We got the best roads ever.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
6. RWRon White
  Best roads ever.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  It's just, just counting on all those people to keep their shit together all the time while you're driving on the highway. And most people do it. Most people, the vast majority of us keep our shit together.
8. RWRon White
  That's why I think bus drivers should make more than pilots Be- because there's way more shit to run into-
9. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh yeah, way more.
10. RWRon White
  ... than, uh, then there is up there.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  And way more things that can make mistakes that are all around you.
12. RWRon White
  Right, right. Th- the things that are completely out of your control.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
14. RWRon White
  That isn't going on up in the sky there.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  There's also people play stupid road games. I'm sure you've seen those. People get aggressive with each other on the road. When, when you're in a car, and this was explained to me, I forget who told us, who told us this? With, with the, the reason why road rage really exists at such a hyper level is because you're really tuned in because you're driving the car. It's an extraordinary thing. You're, you're really, you know, you know things are happening fast so your mind's tuned in, so any little thing like, "What the fuck?"
16. RWRon White
  Yeah, right.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  'Cause you're already at like 7.
18. RWRon White
  Right.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  And so when you're already at 7 and something happens it just, it freaks you out.
9:38 – 12:41
Mexico City etiquette, pharmacy culture, and “what can you buy?”
1. RWRon White
  It's am- you know, it's amazing how, how even-headed I think I am but what really little it takes (laughs) to set me off, you know?
2. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
3. RWRon White
  I like to think I'm a step above all that stuff but I was in Mexico City the other day and this guy... I needed to find something, um, a s- a pharmacy. And, and then so this guy was a b- it's in a nice part, Beverly Hills part of Mexico City and this guy's walking, he's got a business suit on and I've... literally I don't look that great, my hair's all over the place and, and, uh, I said, uh, "Can you tell me where a pharmacy..." And the guy didn't even look at me, he just kept on walking. I said, "Please could you just tell me where a pharmacy is?" And the guy didn't even look at me. I was like, "Fuck y-" you know. I went off on the fucking guy, you know. He was just trying to get where he was going and didn't want to be stopped by some big hairy drug addicted looking thing, you know, that was coming at him for s- with questions.
4. JRJoe Rogan
  You do look a little sketchy. Like if you're asking for where the pharmacy is and I don't know who you are.
5. RWRon White
  Right. And it, and I'm-
6. JRJoe Rogan
  I can see some suspicious thoughts (laughs) .
7. RWRon White
  And I'm basically wearing pajamas and, you know, the wind's blowing and, but-
8. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh.
9. RWRon White
  But that's how far I am away from really snapping (laughs) . I, I'm not up, I'm not way ab- I'm not hovering above every- anything I don't think.
10. JRJoe Rogan
  There was always the joke that you could go to pharmacies in Mexico and just buy anything. Is that true? 'Cause people would always say that. They would call them like Mexican s-
11. RWRon White
  Mm-hmm.
12. JRJoe Rogan
  I was always calling them Mexican supplements.
13. RWRon White
  Yeah.
14. JRJoe Rogan
  Or steroids and things that people could buy over there. Is it true?
15. RWRon White
  I think, you know, there, there are some things that you can get like Valium and stuff like that but you can't go down there and get like opioids or you know.
16. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh no?
17. RWRon White
  I don't think so. You know, I don't know.
18. JRJoe Rogan
  I don't, I don't know I'm just...
19. NANarrator
  Like I mean according to a few TikTok videos I've seen you can walk in and get like lots of steroid type stuff for sure. I'm looking on like for some good-
20. RWRon White
  Yeah, you can get HGH and stuff like that but that's not what you're talking about.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  I'm talking about everything like what can you get out there?
22. RWRon White
  Yeah, yeah. No I don't think it's really that open a book.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  What can you get out there?
24. RWRon White
  I know you can get cheap dental care down there.
25. NANarrator
  I mean that's what, but I think they decriminalized a lot of things in Mexico fairly recently. No but I mean it just isn't anything that crazy. You can get that stuff here.
26. JRJoe Rogan
  Lexapro. So you can just go in with no prescription and buy-
27. NANarrator
  Viagra.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  But, but the weird ones like Lexapro, isn't that... that's like an anti-depressant right?
29. RWRon White
  I have no idea what that is.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  You can just go buy an- penicillin.
12:41 – 14:55
“Soma” from ancient elixir to muscle relaxer—and performance drugs in sports
1. JRJoe Rogan
  Isn't it kind of ironic that so, is soma, is it sleeping medication? Find out what it is. 'Cause the, the original soma was, like, from-
2. NANarrator
  Muscle relaxer.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  ... muscle relaxer. So the original soma, they don't even know what it was. They were just, there's all sorts of, uh, questions as to what it was. They think it had something to do with mushrooms perhaps, but it might've been a bunch of other psychedelics too. They don't know what it was.
4. RWRon White
  I still don't know what it is.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  Have you heard the term?
6. RWRon White
  N- no.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  You've never heard the term soma?
8. RWRon White
  Uh-uh.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  It's like an ancient term for, like, some sort of a magical elixir. Am I saying that right?
10. NANarrator
  Yeah, I mean, that's when I Google it. It says that it itself is also a god, so I don't even...
11. RWRon White
  I don't know, I want some. (laughs)
12. JRJoe Rogan
  Some drink as most famous... Yeah, ancient Indian drug, soma-
13. RWRon White
  This is, uh, this is right down my alley.
14. JRJoe Rogan
  ... made from a plant called soma, is a god and a drink that was used as an offering to the gods in some Vedic rituals. Soma was celebrated at an early period as shown in the hymns of the Rg, Rigveda. Wow.
15. RWRon White
  From when?
16. JRJoe Rogan
  They don't really, oh, fucking thousands of years ago. When was that?
17. RWRon White
  And they still use this today?
18. NANarrator
  Uh.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  No, it's just, it, you know, it's, it's used-
20. RWRon White
  It's, now it's more of a term?
21. JRJoe Rogan
  ... as like a term, as like a, soma is like a thing that cures all. A soma is a thing that clears minds.
22. NANarrator
  This doesn't say, it's just a...
23. JRJoe Rogan
  Some, you know, there's various interpretations of what it does, but it's kinda crazy that they, (laughs) they named a muscle relaxant that. Like how-
24. RWRon White
  Right.
25. JRJoe Rogan
  ... brazen? How brazen?
26. RWRon White
  Uh, I bet you do feel better, though, overall.
27. JRJoe Rogan
  I bet you feel great.
28. RWRon White
  Yeah. Uh, my muscles are pretty relaxed all the time. Yours aren't. You, you need a muscle relaxer.
29. JRJoe Rogan
  What do those do to you? They just conk you out?
30. RWRon White
  They make me, uh, play better golf 'cause it takes the tension out of my shoulders and my swing.
14:55 – 20:05
Efren Reyes, hustling myths, and the artistry of elite pool
1. RWRon White
  I've been watching this, there's a g- there's a pool player that comes up on my feed n- now and he's, like, an old, kind of chubby, fat Mexican-looking guy and he's like the greatest pool player that ever lived, you know?
2. JRJoe Rogan
  Efren Reyes.
3. RWRon White
  Is that who it is?
4. JRJoe Rogan
  From the Philippines.
5. RWRon White
  Fuck, man.
6. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
7. RWRon White
  I've been watching that guy play a little bit. (laughs)
8. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh, he's
9. NANarrator
  Yeah.
10. RWRon White
  Once it, once it gets on my TikTok, it starts feeding to me, if I know I eat it, you know, the whole, the whole, "Here have another one, have another one." But I liked watching the f- guy play fucking pool.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
12. RWRon White
  I mean, like, God, he's got, he's fearless. He's got ice water just pumping through his veins, you know?
13. JRJoe Rogan
  He's a wizard, man. Like a real wizard. He does things on a pool table that, i- there he is.
14. RWRon White
  Yeah, that guy right there. Tha- that guy's all over my TikTok feed now. I can't get him off.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  He does things on a pool table that are, like, magical.
16. RWRon White
  How old is he?
17. JRJoe Rogan
  Well, he's older now. You know, he's probably in his late s- yeah, like, 69 it says.
18. RWRon White
  And he still-
19. JRJoe Rogan
  And that's old for a pool player.
20. RWRon White
  ... still plays?
21. JRJoe Rogan
  He still plays all the time. There's, they s- live stream videos of him playing people-
22. RWRon White
  Yeah.
23. JRJoe Rogan
  ... down in the Philippines.
24. RWRon White
  That's what I'm, that's what I'm getting, I think. On my PlayStation 3.
25. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. So they have these setups like, Efren Reyes is, you know, r- really arguably the greatest pool player in the history of pool players and he's now still playing all the time online. And he plays online and he's not as good as he was when he was in his prime because he's, you know, he's 69 years old. It's a young man's game.
26. RWRon White
  (laughs) Look at that.
27. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. It really-
28. RWRon White
  I know I played pool my whole life. We had a pool table at my house when I was a kid and, uh, so, so I, I always like watching, you know, trick players and people that could, uh, you know, run, run the table and do-
29. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
30. RWRon White
  ... weird shots and stuff like that.
20:05 – 25:50
Golf addiction, perfection rarity, and why the game eats your life
1. RWRon White
  I'm writing a book right now, 50 Years of Bad Golf: How I Did It. And, uh, like I... Like I had a plan to do it this bad for so long.
2. JRJoe Rogan
  Tony says you play good.
3. RWRon White
  No, I, I... You know what? That... I'm back like I... I'm, I'm like I was at anything. I can, I can beat guys my age. If you don't know me and we're playing golf together, I'll kick your ass.
4. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
5. RWRon White
  But, uh... But am I a player? No. There are guys 10 years older than me that can beat me to death, uh, on a golf course, you know. Any of those old pro guys that I hook up with every once in a while. Daly can still beat me like a drum, but, uh...
6. JRJoe Rogan
  Isn't it interesting? It's like there's the- the... A control of a game like that. What an extraordinary talent because it's so, it's so variable. There's so many things going on.
7. RWRon White
  You, you, you, you literally do... Never do the same thing twice the whole time you play golf your whole life because something's gonna be different about the wind and the lay and the where you want it and what kind of lie you got on the ground, what club you need to get to that. And, uh, it's all a game of questions and you, and you rarely have the answer. Even Ben Hogan, who was arguably the best ball striker ever said that in an average day of golf, he hits two shots the way he wanted to exactly.
8. JRJoe Rogan
  Wow.
9. RWRon White
  And the rest of them are close to that, you know. So his misses are really good. So if I hit one shot a month that I... About... Then I'll go, "That was perfect." And, uh... And that's (laughs) that's about how often I can do it. Everything else is pretty good.
10. JRJoe Rogan
  It's such a fascinating game.
11. RWRon White
  Yeah. You don't have the time.
12. JRJoe Rogan
  Nope.
13. RWRon White
  (laughs) You don't have the time.
14. JRJoe Rogan
  Nope. Nope. Nope, I don't.
15. RWRon White
  No.
16. JRJoe Rogan
  I'm scared of it. Scared I'd love it.
17. RWRon White
  You would and, uh... And... But you've always had that position, right? You've always kind of looked to the golf set. That's what people... They wanna get into golf, they think about starting out, it is a waste of time and money. You need to understand that going into it. More time than you can ever imagine. And, uh, you have to settle with how good you wanna be because to be better than that, you gotta spend hours and hours. But you can just... If you wanna just rake it around and gamble with your friends, you know, you don't have to practice all that much.
18. JRJoe Rogan
  I knew quite a few comic buddies that I think lost a little inspiration in their career because they were spending so much time playing golf.
19. RWRon White
  Yeah. Well, that's how I killed my days. And I, I still do to this day, you know. When I, when I was on the road, like you were... I don't know what you were doing (laughs) during the day, but I was... I was trading, uh, tickets for, uh... (laughs) for free golf, schmoozing wherever I could and, and, uh-
20. JRJoe Rogan
  So you just play everywhere you go?
21. RWRon White
  Yeah. We still do, you know. That's, uh...
22. JRJoe Rogan
  That's nice.
23. RWRon White
  We travel at night, wake up at a golf course, crawl out, you're in the parking lot. You know, it's like you were FedExed over there.
24. JRJoe Rogan
  That's great.
25. RWRon White
  Crawl out of the box and play some golf. You know? Kill another day. Kill another day. You're over here building an empire (laughs) and I'm killing another day.
26. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah. But killing another day is sweet.
27. RWRon White
  Yeah.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  To be able to do it that way.
29. RWRon White
  Yeah.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  I mean, what is life? What is life if not enjoyment?
25:50 – 31:35
From sports to society: misinformation, QAnon, and how conspiracies spread
1. RWRon White
  That's how I defend myself. I don't... I'm, I'm really careful about what information I let in my head, because I don't know what's gonna stew around in there, you know?
2. JRJoe Rogan
  I hear you, man. I hear you. Especially in this day and age. And also, there's like... There's so much to worry about. Every fucking time I get on the news and I start l- reading what's happening in the world every day, it's something n- new that's insane that you have to worry about.
3. RWRon White
  I know. And that's why I'm just real c- (laughs)
4. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
5. RWRon White
  ... careful about what news I let in my head.
6. JRJoe Rogan
  Shit. (laughs)
7. RWRon White
  You know? And I've, I've g-
8. JRJoe Rogan
  Don't let it in.
9. RWRon White
  And I've got, you know... I've got news feeds on my phone that are... these are th- these are news organizations that I trust, that if something wacko in the world's gonna happen, it's news, and they're gonna pick it up.
10. JRJoe Rogan
  Mm-hmm.
11. RWRon White
  And, uh... But if it's something completely unverifiable that I don't even need to fucking know, they're not gonna pick it up. And, uh, so... But if... I know when people go down that fucking dark road in the web, they come out on the other side, and sometimes they're... you can't get 'em back. You know, they're full-blown... I got friends that went out and came back full-blown QAnon. They believe that-
12. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
13. RWRon White
  ... Satan, uh, there's Satan-worshipping cabal of Democrats that eat babies. I'm like, "Where are all the missing babies?" You know, you... How many-
14. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
15. RWRon White
  ... babies does it take to feed all the Democrats? If they're all drinking the blood of the babies-
16. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
17. RWRon White
  ... there are gonna be some missing babies, right? Somewhere? No.
18. JRJoe Rogan
  Oh.
19. RWRon White
  No, yeah, they're from, they're from overseas or I don't... They'll, they'll... they've got some answer to anything you throw at 'em. Tom Hanks. I'm like, "That's not true!" Tom Hanks is still making movies! Tom Hanks didn't eat a baby! Yeah, he did. And they believe it.
20. JRJoe Rogan
  Where did the Tom Hanks-
21. RWRon White
  They believe it!
22. JRJoe Rogan
  ... one come from?
23. RWRon White
  I don't know!
24. JRJoe Rogan
  Where did that one come from?
25. RWRon White
  It just... Straight outta QAnon, it was, uh, that was their basic doctrine in the beginning, was all this bizarre claims. And I've... I had... I got a friend that's... Well, you met her and, and I'm not gonna say her name, but it's... I mean, she believes this with all of her heart.
26. JRJoe Rogan
  Right.
27. RWRon White
  All of her heart.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
29. RWRon White
  And there's nothing I can do to, to, to say, you know... Uh, nothing I can do. Nothing I can do to change her mind.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  Ron, I think at least a certain portion of that is other governments fucking with people-
31:35 – 36:47
Government incentives, religious power, and comedy as neutral ground
1. JRJoe Rogan
  It's ... The problem with it is, like how many people do you know want to run the government? How many people do you know? How many, I mean, how many people that you know that are like really healthy, clear-thinking, business-minded people that have been successful that wanna run the government?
2. RWRon White
  Nobody.
3. JRJoe Rogan
  Fucking nobody.
4. RWRon White
  Nobody.
5. JRJoe Rogan
  So you're not getting any of those folks.
6. RWRon White
  No, you're not. And what you're gonna get is, you're gonna get their money to influence things in the direction they'd like to see it go without them having to be there doing day-to-day stuff on it.
7. JRJoe Rogan
  But-
8. RWRon White
  So they can have influence on it, but they don't wanna ... They don't ... Do they wanna be the (laughs) president of the United States? No.
9. JRJoe Rogan
  Do they have it set up like a minor league, like they groom politicians, they get them to a position and like, "I like how you stand on this-"
10. RWRon White
  Right. Yeah.
11. JRJoe Rogan
  "... but maybe if you stood a little bit further on this line-"
12. RWRon White
  Yeah, sure.
13. JRJoe Rogan
  "... we can support you on this."
14. RWRon White
  Oh, absolutely. Absolutely.
15. JRJoe Rogan
  And then they start grooming them.
16. RWRon White
  Yeah.
17. JRJoe Rogan
  Grooming them for the big stage, just like-
18. RWRon White
  Right.
19. JRJoe Rogan
  ... you would do with, like regional plays and all of a sudden you're on Broadway. You know?
20. RWRon White
  Right. Well, that's, you know, that's the religious right, you know? They're, you know, they wanted, they want somebody ... They wanna get rid of abortion, so what are they gonna do? They gotta stack those courts. What are you gonna do? You're gonna, "Okay, we got ... There's a trillion of us and we'll put you in office and we'll be, but you gotta, uh, you gotta put this judge here and this judge there, so what ... Our thing comes to pass." So that's just the way it works.
21. JRJoe Rogan
  I'm even more cynical. I, I just can't believe that human beings as a whole haven't resolved a bunch of different things. There's a few, there's a bunch I, I don't believe are really coming back around. I think people are making this argument that they're coming back around and they're highlighting moments where it's coming back around.
22. RWRon White
  Coming back around to what?
23. JRJoe Rogan
  I just don't ... I just, uh, I mean, I think this is one of the weirdest times ever for human beings to communicate. And I think because there's so many of us and there's so many people that are talking and there's so many voices and it's happening on everyone's phone, and it's happening all over the fucking world all at once.
24. RWRon White
  It's never been like this ever-
25. JRJoe Rogan
  Ever.
26. RWRon White
  ... in the history and it makes you wonder where it's going.
27. JRJoe Rogan
  I think it's short-circuiting everything. (laughs)
28. RWRon White
  I do too.
29. JRJoe Rogan
  It's short-circuiting our government. It's short-circuiting-
30. RWRon White
  It's ... It makes me nervous. And one of the things that makes me nervous, this government that we have, it's complicated.
36:47 – 40:47
Religion, Uncle Charlie’s sincerity, and why new religions trigger suspicion
1. RWRon White
  Back when I went to church and, uh, you know, my uncle's still a preacher to this day, Dr. Charles Pollard, still preaching to the American Indians out in Farmington, New Mexico for no money, you know.
2. JRJoe Rogan
  Wow.
3. RWRon White
  Has 23 people about at every service, then he goes to jails and, and he's 90 years old, you know.
4. JRJoe Rogan
  Wow.
5. RWRon White
  Still working to this day, still-
6. JRJoe Rogan
  Wow.
7. RWRon White
  ... knocking it out for the Lord. And, uh, and he used to be the president of the Southern Baptist Convention, uh, my, my uncle did. So that was a very powerful position. And, uh, then he fell out of favor with him because he just didn't believe in some of the doctorate and, and then he started... He showed up at my grandmother's (laughs) birthday party on a Harley with no shirt on.
8. JRJoe Rogan
  Stop. (laughs)
9. RWRon White
  I'm like, "Oh, no. Uncle Charlie's gone nuts."
10. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
11. RWRon White
  And, uh, (imitates engine revving) so he went down to Corpus, I think it was, and he started this kind of Gospel according to Charlie thing and then-
12. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
13. RWRon White
  ... it was just a kind of a phase he went through and then he, you know-
14. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
15. RWRon White
  But now he, he, he's, uh, still believes in, in that basic doctrine and, uh, and I love him to death. He's one of my favorite people. I'll talk to him all day long, you know. I just... He's a treasure, he really is. And just the sweetheart of a guy about, all about, you know, love and sweetness.
16. JRJoe Rogan
  That's awesome.
17. RWRon White
  His wife died and, uh, and I asked him, I said, "Did your knowledge of, uh, of God and Jesus, and did that help you with her death?" And he goes, "Nope. (laughs) Not a bit. It hurt and it hurt, and I hated and I didn't understand it. I was like everybody else, you know."
18. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
19. RWRon White
  Didn't even help, so... Now, but that's just how honest he is, so.
20. JRJoe Rogan
  Wow.
21. RWRon White
  Uncle Charlie. I hope you're listening.
22. JRJoe Rogan
  Isn't it fascinating how much religion's practiced by so many different people in so many different ways? And yet, if someone tried to start a new one right now, good fucking luck. (laughs)
23. RWRon White
  (laughs)
24. JRJoe Rogan
  Good luck. The, the, the Feds would investigate you.
25. RWRon White
  Right, yeah, yeah.
26. JRJoe Rogan
  Immediately.
27. RWRon White
  Right.
28. JRJoe Rogan
  If you started the, if you start your own religion, if you bought some land out in Bastrop.
29. RWRon White
  Right.
30. JRJoe Rogan
  And the R- the Ron White Church.
40:47 – 1:08:39
Tax-exempt empires and “big church” hypocrisy: Osteen vs Mattress Mack
1. NANarrator
  Oh, this is a perfect question for ChatGPT, I feel like.
2. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah.
3. NANarrator
  So I asked ChatGPT and there are 12 steps.
4. JRJoe Rogan
  We'll have to do.
5. NANarrator
  It gave me this, wants to know.
6. JRJoe Rogan
  Tw- 12 steps. Determine your purpose and beliefs.
7. RWRon White
  Oh.
8. JRJoe Rogan
  Clearly define the purpose and beliefs of your church. This includes your mission, vision, and core doctrines.
9. RWRon White
  Okay.
10. JRJoe Rogan
  Two, legal structure. Choose a legal structure for your church. Options may include becoming a nonprofit organiz- organization, establishing a religious corporation, or forming a religious association. Consult legal experts to determine the best structure for your situation. Name... Okay. So it seems like you just have to, like, get a legal thing, you know, like you would, like some sort of an LLC or something.
11. RWRon White
  Yeah, well-
12. JRJoe Rogan
  Whatever-
13. RWRon White
  ... what do you wanna, what you want is a tax-exempt status, and then the rest of it doesn't really matter.
14. JRJoe Rogan
  Yeah, that's not hard.
15. RWRon White
  You get that tax-exempt status, then you can start hoarding wealth-
16. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes.
17. RWRon White
  ... in the name of Jesus Christ-
18. JRJoe Rogan
  Yes.
19. RWRon White
  ... of the Latter Day Saints-
20. JRJoe Rogan
  Right.
21. RWRon White
  ... or whatever, and you can hold all these billions of dollars in real estate holdings all under that tax-exempt status. If they start, you know, the way, this is the only thing gets me going, is big church, big church. Uh, we need to tax big church and, and, uh, and, and, and those pastors of those mega churches, they need to be looked at under the biggest, brightest light you can look at. Joel Osteen? Fuck you, Osteen.
22. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
23. RWRon White
  I tried. He said it right here first. Now, uh, the Mattress Max-
24. JRJoe Rogan
  He does seem-
25. RWRon White
  ... makes a much better, uh, re- to me, if you want an example of how Christ wanted us to live, it would be Mattress Max and not Joel Osteen. You know who-
26. JRJoe Rogan
  I don't know who Mattress Max is.
27. RWRon White
  Well, he's the guy that bets 10 million bucks on the, on the, uh, Astros every year and wins. Uh, he, this is how he got famous. That's Mattress Max right there. He, dur- during the big floods in Houston just a few years ago...... when, uh, there, here's two things that happened. Mattress Max, people were literally dying in the street. Mattress Max owned this huge-
28. JRJoe Rogan
  (laughs)
29. RWRon White
  ... furniture store. "Come up here." He opened him up, "Sleep on them couches, I don't care. And I'll find a way to make food for you guys." And I mean-
30. JRJoe Rogan
  Wow.