Joe Rogan Experience #2094 - Colion Noir

1. 0:00 – 15:00

   (drumbeats) Joe Rogan podcast,…

   1. CNColion Noir0:00

      (drumbeats) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.

   2. NANarrator0:04

      The Joe Rogan Experience.

   3. Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. (instrumental music plays) What up?

   4. JRJoe Rogan0:13

      What's up?

   5. CNColion Noir0:13

      Nothing much, man.

   6. JRJoe Rogan0:14

      Good to see you.

   7. CNColion Noir0:14

      Good to be back.

   8. JRJoe Rogan0:15

      We had a full Texas day today, dude.

   9. CNColion Noir0:17

      Yeah.

   10. JRJoe Rogan0:17

       (laughs) Full Texas.

   11. CNColion Noir0:18

       Doesn't- doesn't get more Texas than that.

   12. JRJoe Rogan0:20

       Shotguns.

   13. CNColion Noir0:21

       Yeah.

   14. JRJoe Rogan0:21

       Ate barbecue, went to the Staccato Range. How sick is that place?

   15. CNColion Noir0:24

       Man, dude, you shoulda, like ... I remember when I first went there, like I called it the ghetto, because that's what we do, but it like- there was nothing there.

   16. JRJoe Rogan0:31

       Just dirt.

   17. CNColion Noir0:32

       Just dirt, and like they had some- they had some bays and stuff like that too. Um, and we- you know, me and my videographer, we did some shooting out there and we filmed, but it was like nothing like it is now.

   18. JRJoe Rogan0:40

       Yeah.

   19. CNColion Noir0:40

       Now it looks like an entire little village-

   20. JRJoe Rogan0:43

       They're dumping-

   21. CNColion Noir0:43

       ... of guns.

   22. JRJoe Rogan0:44

       ... a ton of money into that place.

   23. CNColion Noir0:46

       Dude. Like-

   24. JRJoe Rogan0:46

       Yeah.

   25. CNColion Noir0:47

       ... c- like when we were going around, he was showing us like the whole property. I was like, I don't know if you saw my face, I was like ... what the fuck? (laughs)

   26. JRJoe Rogan0:54

       I know, there's a lot- it must be a lot of money in selling really good guns.

   27. CNColion Noir0:56

       Yeah.

   28. JRJoe Rogan0:57

       'Cause-

   29. CNColion Noir0:57

       Yeah. To say the least 'cause I-

   30. JRJoe Rogan0:59

       Like, the lake? Like you guys have a lake?
2. 15:00 – 30:00

   Right. …

   1. CNColion Noir15:00

      Like, changing... Like, the changeover process-

   2. JRJoe Rogan15:02

      Right.

   3. CNColion Noir15:02

      ... is really annoying.

   4. JRJoe Rogan15:03

      It is weird.

   5. CNColion Noir15:04

      Um...

   6. JRJoe Rogan15:04

      And s- sometimes, like, uh, phone numbers get all fucked up.

   7. CNColion Noir15:09

      Yeah. (laughs)

   8. JRJoe Rogan15:09

      Like, something happened where phone numbers got attached in iMessage to old emails of-

   9. CNColion Noir15:16

      Yes.

   10. JRJoe Rogan15:16

       ... other people.

   11. CNColion Noir15:17

       Yeah. It's... Uh, I've had some really spooky stuff happen on my phones. And I'm like, "What the hell's going on here?"

   12. JRJoe Rogan15:22

       Yeah.

   13. CNColion Noir15:23

       Like, I had a friend tell me. He was like... He's like, "I called you and somebody else picked up."

   14. JRJoe Rogan15:28

       Yeah, I had that happen to a friend too.

   15. CNColion Noir15:29

       Yeah. Okay, okay. (laughs)

   16. JRJoe Rogan15:31

       Yeah. I go, "Dude, is this your phone number?"

   17. CNColion Noir15:32

       Yeah.

   18. JRJoe Rogan15:32

       He goes, "Yeah." I go, "Bro, a woman answered the phone."

   19. CNColion Noir15:34

       That's exactly what happened to me.

   20. JRJoe Rogan15:35

       Yeah?

   21. CNColion Noir15:36

       Yeah.

   22. JRJoe Rogan15:36

       What's that?

   23. CNColion Noir15:37

       I have no idea.

   24. JRJoe Rogan15:38

       Oh, yeah.

   25. CNColion Noir15:38

       And I... And maybe... I mean, I have... I don't, I don't know. I mean, at the end of the day, we are talking about devices, right? That are essentially super computers in our hands.

   26. JRJoe Rogan15:48

       Yeah.

   27. CNColion Noir15:48

       So, maybe it's just the fault of the system that, that just... It's bound to happen-

   28. JRJoe Rogan15:53

       Yeah.

   29. CNColion Noir15:53

       ... where you get this kind of cross-communication and it just can't keep up with it. Um, I forgot who the comedian was. Uh, he... You know, he was talking about how impatient we are these days because... And it was one of my favorite bits, because it's so true. He's like, "We get these cell phones, and then the moment it stops working a little bit, we get pissed off, and it's like, it's sending message to fucking space."

   30. JRJoe Rogan16:13

       Oh, that's Louis C.K.
3. 30:00 – 45:00

   So that's interesting you…

   1. JRJoe Rogan30:00

      and the girl's 16, now you got a real problem.

   2. CNColion Noir30:02

      So that's interesting you say that, 'cause I got in, I got in, I got into a kind of a little bit of shit in my law school class when I was in law school one time when we were talking about statutory rape. Um, and it, so statutory rape is a strict liability crime, basically. There's no excuse for it. She can have a fake ID, she can look 30 years old and give you all the signals that she's of age. And if she's underage, you're fucked.

   3. JRJoe Rogan30:24

      Right.

   4. CNColion Noir30:24

      Regardless, right?

   5. JRJoe Rogan30:25

      Right. Even if they lie.

   6. CNColion Noir30:26

      Yeah. And I didn't think that was fair, personally. Um, and (laughs) I, I, there are very few people in my, in my law school class who agreed with me with respect to that. I understand the base, I understand the reasoning behind it, but I mean, at that point, that person's life is done.

   7. JRJoe Rogan30:42

      Yeah.

   8. CNColion Noir30:42

      Especially considering if the, if ... And I've, I've known of girls and women who have gone to l- great lengths to mask their age, and to be deceptive about it, and lie about it to people. And then if somebody succumbs to that-Now, not only do they go to jail, now they're a sex offender-

   9. JRJoe Rogan30:59

      Yeah.

   10. CNColion Noir30:59

       ... for the rest of their lives, right?

   11. JRJoe Rogan31:00

       Well, th- to- to your point, I have a friend and his sister's friends, they're in California.

   12. CNColion Noir31:07

       Mm-hmm.

   13. JRJoe Rogan31:07

       His sister's friends are 15 and he's got this giant issue because the 15-year-old friends are using fake IDs and going to LA clubs.

   14. CNColion Noir31:16

       Yeah. (laughs)

   15. JRJoe Rogan31:17

       They're fucking sophomores in high school-

   16. CNColion Noir31:19

       Yeah.

   17. JRJoe Rogan31:19

       ... and they're getting into LA clubs with fake IDs.

   18. CNColion Noir31:22

       And you wouldn't be able to tell just by looking at them.

   19. JRJoe Rogan31:23

       You cannot tell.

   20. CNColion Noir31:24

       Yeah.

   21. JRJoe Rogan31:24

       When they're, they've hit puberty-

   22. CNColion Noir31:25

       Yeah.

   23. JRJoe Rogan31:26

       ... and they're wearing makeup and they're wearing sexy clothes-

   24. CNColion Noir31:28

       Yep.

   25. JRJoe Rogan31:28

       ... and they're going out... Sorry to say sexy, but 15.

   26. CNColion Noir31:31

       (laughs)

   27. JRJoe Rogan31:31

       You know what I'm saying? Prod- provocative clothing-

   28. CNColion Noir31:32

       Sti- from a stereotypical aspect-

   29. JRJoe Rogan31:33

       Yes.

   30. CNColion Noir31:33

       ... of understanding what sexy clothes look like.
4. 45:00 – 1:00:00

   It's funny that this…

   1. CNColion Noir45:00

      for me, that's generally how, that's 99.9% of the way that I carry, unless it's, like, in a bag or something.

   2. JRJoe Rogan45:07

      It's funny that this conversation is so normal with you and I.

   3. CNColion Noir45:11

      (laughs)

   4. JRJoe Rogan45:11

      But if you have this conversation with people from California, they will look at you like you're fucking insane.

   5. CNColion Noir45:15

      (laughs)

   6. JRJoe Rogan45:16

      Like, what you carry a gun?

   7. CNColion Noir45:18

      Yeah.

   8. JRJoe Rogan45:19

      Well, it's also, like, there's a reality... Like, here's one thing. Like, like constitutional carry. When, when my friends from California found out that constitutional carry was passed in Texas-

   9. CNColion Noir45:29

      Mm-hmm.

   10. JRJoe Rogan45:30

       So anyone can conceal carry as long as you're not a criminal.

   11. CNColion Noir45:32

       Yeah.

   12. JRJoe Rogan45:33

       When they saw that, they were like, "What?"

   13. CNColion Noir45:34

       Yeah.

   14. JRJoe Rogan45:35

       "Are you crazy?" But wasn't that recently just passed in Ohio-

   15. CNColion Noir45:38

       Yup, and-

   16. JRJoe Rogan45:38

       ... and crime went down?

   17. CNColion Noir45:39

       Down. I did a video on it.

   18. JRJoe Rogan45:40

       Went down.

   19. CNColion Noir45:41

       Yup.

   20. JRJoe Rogan45:41

       Yes.

   21. CNColion Noir45:42

       Yeah.

   22. JRJoe Rogan45:42

       Which is interesting.

   23. CNColion Noir45:43

       Because it's, it's, it's, it's a counterintuitive logic, right? Because if your, if your starting point is if you make guns illegal, then nobody will have guns. Then yeah, I guess you could s- you could make the argument that-

   24. JRJoe Rogan45:57

       Yeah, if nobody broke the law ever-

   25. CNColion Noir45:59

       Exactly, right?

   26. JRJoe Rogan46:00

       ... including criminals?

   27. CNColion Noir46:00

       Exactly. So... (laughs)

   28. JRJoe Rogan46:01

       What a fucking naive perspective.

   29. CNColion Noir46:03

       (laughs) Like, but people think like that.

   30. JRJoe Rogan46:04

       Right, but if you think you're gonna rob anybody, and then now all of a sudden there's constitutional carry and anyone can have a gun on them-
5. 1:00:00 – 1:02:08

   Yeah. …

   1. JRJoe Rogan1:00:00

      parked car, that blue car right there. Oh, wow. Didn't hit anything else. It's a different vid- uh, angle.

   2. CNColion Noir1:00:05

      Yeah.

   3. JRJoe Rogan1:00:05

      They got lucky. Yeah.

   4. CNColion Noir1:00:06

      Very lucky.

   5. JRJoe Rogan1:00:08

      Look at that thing spin.

   6. CNColion Noir1:00:09

      And there's nothing you can do.

   7. JRJoe Rogan1:00:10

      Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. When I was a kid, uh, I lived on a hill in, uh, Newton, Massachusetts and me and my, uh, sister's boyfriend sat on the roof and watched people slide down our hill and crash. We called the cops. We said, "Hey man, you should probably close the street down."

   8. CNColion Noir1:00:27

      Close the street down. Yeah.

   9. JRJoe Rogan1:00:27

      Because there was like five cars in a row.

   10. CNColion Noir1:00:30

       Oh, shit.

   11. JRJoe Rogan1:00:30

       Spun out, bounced off the curb, went into ditches. (laughs) We were just watching people try to come down the hill. Come down. Yeah. And just slide completely out of control.

   12. CNColion Noir1:00:39

       Dude, it's... And that... And you made a good point. It's... When you're... Like now I feel like I'm... You know, with all the traveling I do, you know, dri- we- we've dr- I've driven from Dallas to Utah to New Mexico. I've driven in ice, driven in snow.

   13. JRJoe Rogan1:00:50

       Yeah.

   14. CNColion Noir1:00:51

       So I'm pretty comfortable with it now, even though I still don't really like it.

   15. JRJoe Rogan1:00:53

       There's nothing you can do about ice though.

   16. CNColion Noir1:00:55

       There's nothing. But there's also, but you pointed out was other people.

   17. JRJoe Rogan1:00:58

       Yeah.

   18. CNColion Noir1:00:59

       So now that's what makes me nervous because I'm like... I remember when we had the, the freeze apocalypse or whatever in Dallas. Yeah, I got in my truck and went out there and started kind of driving around 'cause I kinda... You know, I kinda knew what I was doing.

   19. JRJoe Rogan1:01:10

       Yeah.

   20. CNColion Noir1:01:10

       But I was always w- I was always constantly looking in my rear view mirror because there's gonna be some dumb ass who's going way too fast and doesn't realize that you can't stop at the same distance on ice patches and they're gonna just...

   21. JRJoe Rogan1:01:21

       Right.

   22. CNColion Noir1:01:21

       Ride- ride into me. Um, and so I was like, "This isn't funny anymore." So I just went back inside. (laughs)

   23. JRJoe Rogan1:01:26

       When Austin, they don't even have plows. They don't-

   24. CNColion Noir1:01:28

       Because we're not used to that shit.

   25. JRJoe Rogan1:01:29

       But that's crazy. Like-

   26. CNColion Noir1:01:30

       Yeah.

   27. JRJoe Rogan1:01:31

       ... you should have a few, uh...... it seems like it happens.

   28. CNColion Noir1:01:34

       Look, let me tell you. That, that Texas arrogance, sometimes... 99% of the time-

   29. JRJoe Rogan1:01:38

       (laughs)

   30. CNColion Noir1:01:38

       ... it's a great thing. There's that other 1% where it's like-

Episode duration: 2:57:56