Joe Rogan Experience #2095 - Moshe Kasher

1. 0:00 – 15:00

   (drumming music) Joe Rogan podcast,…

   1. JRJoe Rogan0:00

      (drumming music) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.

   2. NANarrator0:04

      The Joe Rogan Experience.

   3. JRJoe Rogan0:06

      Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. (rock music)

   4. MKMoshe Kasher0:12

      Oh. Oh, we rolling? Hi.

   5. JRJoe Rogan0:14

      Yeah. Let's roll. Yeah, they just wanna start the, save the universe, and then they wanna fuck everyone's wife.

   6. MKMoshe Kasher0:18

      Oh, yes. Yes.

   7. JRJoe Rogan0:18

      Yeah. It's-

   8. MKMoshe Kasher0:19

      It, it always begins, yeah, yeah. The, the dimensional portal will open and then it ends with, "You can't fuck your wife anymore, but guess who can?"

   9. JRJoe Rogan0:25

      Yeah. What happens is, first they start stockpiling guns.

   10. MKMoshe Kasher0:29

       Yes.

   11. JRJoe Rogan0:30

       Yeah. It seems like c- cult leaders have to have guns 'cause their faith in their ability to see the universe and all the good and everything is n- not quite good enough. You need an AR.

   12. MKMoshe Kasher0:42

       You need an AR to really get your point across.

   13. JRJoe Rogan0:44

       Quite, quite a few. You need maybe some flash grenades and... (laughs)

   14. MKMoshe Kasher0:46

       I mean, it is interesting. It doesn't feel like... It feels like I wouldn't do that.

   15. JRJoe Rogan0:51

       If you were running a cult?

   16. MKMoshe Kasher0:52

       Well, I wouldn't fuck your wife and make you, like, worship me. I would just-

   17. JRJoe Rogan0:56

       Well, you're a very nice guy, Marshall.

   18. MKMoshe Kasher0:57

       I'm one of the nicest guys in America.

   19. JRJoe Rogan0:59

       You're a very nice guy.

   20. MKMoshe Kasher1:00

       (laughs) I, I, why is it-

   21. JRJoe Rogan1:01

       I d- I don't, I don't know anyone who doesn't like you, by the way.

   22. MKMoshe Kasher1:03

       Is that true?

   23. JRJoe Rogan1:03

       Yes. I've never met anybody like, "That guy's a dick."

   24. MKMoshe Kasher1:06

       Oh, that's really cool.

   25. JRJoe Rogan1:06

       No one.

   26. MKMoshe Kasher1:07

       I love that.

   27. JRJoe Rogan1:07

       Everybody likes you. You're a nice guy.

   28. MKMoshe Kasher1:09

       I like... Thank you. Tha- you're a nice guy too.

   29. JRJoe Rogan1:11

       Thank you.

   30. MKMoshe Kasher1:11

       Yeah. I- I- I have made that a mark on my life. I wanna be a good guy.
2. 15:00 – 30:00

   Sure. …

   1. JRJoe Rogan15:00

   2. MKMoshe Kasher15:00

      Sure.

   3. JRJoe Rogan15:00

      I'm not gonna... But I am friends with some insanely brilliant people that scare the shit outta you without... Like g-... If I talk to Eric Weinstein, I'm like, "What? Are we even the same thing?"

   4. MKMoshe Kasher15:10

      Right, right.

   5. JRJoe Rogan15:10

      Like, what are we? We're not the s-... We're, we're barely the same thing.

   6. MKMoshe Kasher15:13

      You know when you really see that kinda genius, is when they start talking to you in a way you'll understand. You go, "Oh, so you wrote that book that I can't even comprehend, but you're also conversationally able to help me?"

   7. JRJoe Rogan15:23

      Yeah. Eric doesn't even try.

   8. MKMoshe Kasher15:23

      He doesn't. (laughs)

   9. JRJoe Rogan15:24

      He doesn't even try with that.

   10. MKMoshe Kasher15:24

       He leaves you behind. (laughs)

   11. JRJoe Rogan15:25

       He does sometimes. I try to tell him, like, "You gotta help us out here." But, uh, but it's just 'cause that's how he thinks and that's how he communicates. It's like e- e-... If y-... Like, if you're gonna talk about comedy, uh, to someone who doesn't do comedy, you'd probably just start talking like a comic.

   12. MKMoshe Kasher15:38

       Right.

   13. JRJoe Rogan15:38

       Like, "This is what we do. This is how we do it."

   14. MKMoshe Kasher15:39

       Right.

   15. JRJoe Rogan15:39

       "I'm not gonna, like... I can't hold your hand too long. You're 40 years old, but let me- "

   16. MKMoshe Kasher15:42

       Yeah, yeah, yeah.

   17. JRJoe Rogan15:42

       "... just explain how I do it."

   18. MKMoshe Kasher15:44

       Yeah.

   19. JRJoe Rogan15:44

       Either get it or you don't get it, but...

   20. MKMoshe Kasher15:46

       I, um... Well, I was... Uh, on that pool thing, though.

   21. JRJoe Rogan15:49

       Yeah.

   22. MKMoshe Kasher15:49

       The, the... That univer... When you walked into that pool hall th- and saw like, bam, this is another universe.

   23. JRJoe Rogan15:56

       Yeah.

   24. MKMoshe Kasher15:56

       To me, like, that is... That's the experience of my life over and over again. Uh, that is what the book is about, is these, like, these momentary portals into another universe, you know?

   25. JRJoe Rogan16:07

       Hmm.

   26. MKMoshe Kasher16:07

       Where somebody taps you on the shoulder and goes like, "Walk over here." It's like-

   27. JRJoe Rogan16:10

       Oh, yeah.

   28. MKMoshe Kasher16:10

       ... Luke Skywalker, right?

   29. JRJoe Rogan16:11

       Right, right, right.

   30. MKMoshe Kasher16:11

       Like, he's this weak, powerless kid on Dantooine or whatever, and, uh, and then all of a sudden, Obi-Wan Kenobi's there and goes, "Look, there's a whole other universe here."
3. 30:00 – 45:00

   Whoa. …

   1. MKMoshe Kasher30:00

      of those weird gauntlets or whatever, that are made by the same people that make my boots. And they have just meat on their hand. And they just sit there for hours, in a dark room with a, with a, an owl or a hawk or whatever. And over the course of a week, the, the, uh, the, the...... bird will get closer and closer and then start nibbling and then start eating. And at that point, it's yours, and now it's, now it's your falcon.

   2. JRJoe Rogan30:23

      Whoa.

   3. MKMoshe Kasher30:24

      Isn't that crazy?

   4. JRJoe Rogan30:24

      So it just rewires their brain?

   5. MKMoshe Kasher30:26

      Yeah, to be like, "This guy's got the food." So when, so now when he lets me go to hunt for the rat or whatever, I'll come back to the gauntlet.

   6. JRJoe Rogan30:34

      Look at this crazy trap they use to get them.

   7. MKMoshe Kasher30:36

      Huh. And every falcon that a falconer has is caught captured in the wild.

   8. JRJoe Rogan30:41

      Really?

   9. MKMoshe Kasher30:41

      They're not, like, bred or whatever.

   10. JRJoe Rogan30:43

       They're not bred? Wow.

   11. MKMoshe Kasher30:44

       They, they just capture them, and then they do this weird thing where they train them, and then they let them go after a few years of service.

   12. JRJoe Rogan30:49

       When I was in Scotland, there was this lady who was, uh, she trained a, a variety of birds, but she trained owls and falcons. And, uh, so she had a falcon there, and she said the problem with the falcon is when they let it go, it just fucks things up. It just fly, it just finds another bird and kills it. Like, she, like, every time she lets it go, it finds something and kills it.

   13. MKMoshe Kasher31:07

       It's just like an ... Uh, i- it's violent.

   14. JRJoe Rogan31:09

       Oh, it's the worst. It's a monster.

   15. MKMoshe Kasher31:11

       Right.

   16. JRJoe Rogan31:12

       It's just a killing machine. It doesn't matter if it's hungry or not, it's just flying around looking to fuck things up. She said the owl is the second-dumbest bird in the wild.

   17. MKMoshe Kasher31:21

       Really?

   18. JRJoe Rogan31:21

       Yeah.

   19. MKMoshe Kasher31:22

       That's-

   20. JRJoe Rogan31:22

       Isn't that crazy?

   21. MKMoshe Kasher31:23

       How did they get the wise thing?

   22. JRJoe Rogan31:24

       They, someone f- is, got a good PR agent, and they just-

   23. MKMoshe Kasher31:28

       (laughs)

   24. JRJoe Rogan31:28

       ... they got ahead of it.

   25. MKMoshe Kasher31:30

       Owl, baby. It's me.

   26. JRJoe Rogan31:31

       Owls are dumb. She said owls are dumb. She said, uh, the really smart ones are, like, uh, like, falcons are very smart. Crows are the smartest. But, um, the only thing s- dumber than an owl is emus. Emus are dumber.

   27. MKMoshe Kasher31:45

       They're so big, you'd think that they would have big brains.

   28. JRJoe Rogan31:47

       They don't have to be.

   29. MKMoshe Kasher31:49

       Right.

   30. JRJoe Rogan31:49

       They're just, "Shut the fuck up. Give me the food."
4. 45:00 – 1:00:00

   (sighs) …

   1. MKMoshe Kasher45:00

      and found someone like that, and she, it was like cosmetic for her.

   2. JRJoe Rogan45:03

      (sighs)

   3. MKMoshe Kasher45:03

      And she's like, "I'm tired of talking like this, and I have to have, like, a scarf on. And okay, I'll do it."

   4. JRJoe Rogan45:08

      She didn't like the way her trachea looked?

   5. MKMoshe Kasher45:10

      No, I think she, like, talked weird, and, uh, she had issues, for sure.

   6. JRJoe Rogan45:14

      Okay.

   7. MKMoshe Kasher45:14

      But she w- but it was not life or death.

   8. JRJoe Rogan45:16

      Oh, my God.

   9. MKMoshe Kasher45:17

      Anyway.

   10. JRJoe Rogan45:17

       There's some psychos out there, man. Some of them happen to be doctors.

   11. MKMoshe Kasher45:21

       Yeah.

   12. JRJoe Rogan45:21

       Just 'cause someone went to medical school doesn't mean they're not crazy.

   13. MKMoshe Kasher45:24

       No, I, oh, I, I listened to that Dr. Death podcast. Do you ever hear that?

   14. JRJoe Rogan45:28

       No.

   15. MKMoshe Kasher45:28

       It's about a guy who was like, he was a neurosurgeon, and he was just, like, uh, it, it wasn't clear if he was, like, Dr. Mengele, like, wanted to kill people or if he was just, like, a stupid person that was just, like, sl- slashing into people's bodies. Like, it wasn't clear what he was doing. But it looked like when he would open someone up, he had no idea what he was doing. I mean, he just was, like, stapling a artery to a bone. He just, like... And I've-

   16. JRJoe Rogan45:50

       Just for fun?

   17. MKMoshe Kasher45:50

       Who, nobody really knows. But if-

   18. JRJoe Rogan45:52

       So, he was a real surgeon?

   19. MKMoshe Kasher45:53

       He was a real neurosurgeon. And until I heard that podcast, it would've never occurred to me to go to a surgeon and then, m- look him up. I w- I'm sure you-

   20. JRJoe Rogan46:01

       Right.

   21. MKMoshe Kasher46:01

       ... are savvy enough to do that, but I would've just been like, "You're a doctor."

   22. JRJoe Rogan46:04

       Right.

   23. MKMoshe Kasher46:04

       "Like, you must know things. Okay, open up my brainstem and get in there."

   24. JRJoe Rogan46:08

       Yeah, the first time I got surgery, I had, I have n- I had no idea anything about the doctor's credentials, and I don't know anything about him now.

   25. MKMoshe Kasher46:15

       Yeah.

   26. JRJoe Rogan46:16

       I don't even remember his name. He put me under and opened me up and drilled holes in my bones and...

   27. MKMoshe Kasher46:20

       Yeah. Now, I, I heard that, I would, I would always Google. I would, uh, I would go deeper.

   28. JRJoe Rogan46:25

       Yeah, man. You, you can't be fucking (laughs) entirely sure that someone's not out of their mind.

   29. MKMoshe Kasher46:29

       Well, there's certain, there's certain, um, professions like that where you assume their degree is the thing that makes them competent, but you forget that it's just a person. There-

   30. JRJoe Rogan46:38

       There's, here's the guy, it says, "Of the 37 patients, Dunst..." How do you say it? Dunst?
5. 1:00:00 – 1:06:21

   Yes. …

   1. MKMoshe Kasher1:00:00

      Upstate New York and my family lived in Brooklyn in Seagate. Uh, do you know where Seagate is?

   2. JRJoe Rogan1:00:04

      Yes.

   3. MKMoshe Kasher1:00:04

      It's like Pasquana Island-

   4. JRJoe Rogan1:00:05

      Uh-huh.

   5. MKMoshe Kasher1:00:05

      ... at the, at the tip of Brooklyn.

   6. JRJoe Rogan1:00:06

      Right.

   7. MKMoshe Kasher1:00:07

      And that was a Satmar neighborhood, and kids in that neighborhood, we used to play dodgeball games where it would be the ultra-Orthodox kids versus the actually religious kids.

   8. JRJoe Rogan1:00:14

      (laughs)

   9. MKMoshe Kasher1:00:14

      Like, that's how intense things were, like an ultra-Orthodox person that you looked at and went, "Wow, that's a real Jew right there," we were basically the Gentiles of the community.

   10. JRJoe Rogan1:00:23

       Holy shit.

   11. MKMoshe Kasher1:00:24

       It was crazy. And I would be nine months a year in Oakland, regular public school listening to Too Short, fly back to my dad's house, get driven to the ult- the Orthodox barber shop. They'd put a yarmulke on me, slacks, and I would go cosplay as an extra from Fiddler on the Roof for six weeks a year.

   12. JRJoe Rogan1:00:38

       Wow.

   13. MKMoshe Kasher1:00:40

       So, that was the pre, be- before rehab. And th- that's sort of par- I think that's the reason that I fell into the rehab so heavily, uh, into the drugs so heavily is because I was... Everything about me made me feel like I am... Uh, uh, I don't fit. I don't fit. I'm, I'm a hearing person in a deaf world. I'm a, essentially, a Gentile in a, in a Jewish world, you know?

   14. JRJoe Rogan1:00:58

       That is so crazy that you were considered a Gentile.

   15. MKMoshe Kasher1:01:01

       I mean, they didn't really consider me.

   16. JRJoe Rogan1:01:02

       But you were not as religious as them.

   17. MKMoshe Kasher1:01:03

       But, but effectively, effectively-

   18. JRJoe Rogan1:01:04

       There's something wrong with you.

   19. MKMoshe Kasher1:01:05

       Might as well have been. Dude, there was a, there was a-

   20. JRJoe Rogan1:01:06

       Wow.

   21. MKMoshe Kasher1:01:07

       There was a local rabbi when I was getting close to my bar mitzvah, and he goes, uh... He noticed... He was very nice, and he noticed that I, I didn't know Hebrew. These kids spoke, and I'm not kidding, these kids spoke Yiddish as a first language. That's why they had the Eastern European accent, right?

   22. JRJoe Rogan1:01:20

       Wow.

   23. MKMoshe Kasher1:01:21

       So my uncle, he was first generation American, so he sounds like an American because the first generation of Americans say, "Go fit in." Right? But then by the time he had kids, they're like feeling their comfort in, in the United States, and they go, "Don't go fit in. Go to a seminary where we learn Yiddish." So, my cousins sound like the extras from Doctor Zhivago, and my uncle sounds like a New Yorker.

   24. JRJoe Rogan1:01:40

       Wow.

   25. MKMoshe Kasher1:01:40

       Like, it's that weird. So, they speak Yiddish as a first language. I would bring an English prayer book to school, and kids would... The people would be like staring, like it was a scarlet letter, like there's something wrong with me because I had an English book. (laughs)

   26. JRJoe Rogan1:01:50

       'Cause you couldn't speak it in Hebrew.

   27. MKMoshe Kasher1:01:52

       'Cause I didn't know Hebrew.

   28. JRJoe Rogan1:01:54

       You couldn't read in Hebrew. Wow.

   29. MKMoshe Kasher1:01:54

       So, it's getting towards my bar mitzvah, right? It's twel- my 12th year or 11th year, and I don't know the alphabet, and this rabbi sees that I'm struggling. Um, and my dad was deaf, and so he had this kind of like bizarre relationship with the community where he was like one part accepted, one part almost mascot in a way that was, uh, a little insulting, but he was loved, whatever. The rabbi said, "Give him to me. Uh, and I'll teach him Hebrew." Right? This is like the '90s, uh, early or late '80s, early '90s. You could, at that time, ask for some alone time with a child and then be handed over, no questions asked, right? So, I go to his house and he starts teaching me the Hebrew, uh, uh, the Hebrew, uh, the alphabet, basic, elemental. I mean, like, this is like a Talmudic scholar teaching me the ABCs, right? And I am struggling. I, like, can't get it. And he goes, "Don't worry, don't worry." He goes, "Don't, don't, don't, don't be embarrassed. Hold on. Sh- Shmulik, Shmulik, come in, come, come." And his son sh- comes into the room, and he goes, "Do the English alphabet." This is an American kid. He goes, "Do the English alphabet." And the kid goes, "Oh, no. Uh, A, B, G..." And then he slaps me. The rabbi slaps me on the back and he goes, "See? He is stupid in English. You are stupid in Hebrew. Everybody's stupid." (laughs)

   30. JRJoe Rogan1:03:06

       (laughs)

Episode duration: 2:26:15