Joe Rogan Experience #2097 - Jeff Dye

1. 0:00 – 15:00

   (drum roll) Joe Rogan podcast,…

   1. NANarrator0:00

      (drum roll) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.

   2. NANarrator0:04

      The Joe Rogan Experience.

   3. JRJoe Rogan0:06

      Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. (rock music) Hey, Jeff Dunn. How you doing, fellas? Let's roll with it.

   4. JDJeff Dye0:14

      Thanks for having me.

   5. JRJoe Rogan0:15

      My pleasure, brother.

   6. JDJeff Dye0:16

      This is ... I'm a big fan, so.

   7. JRJoe Rogan0:17

      You were very funny last night. It was fun.

   8. JDJeff Dye0:18

      Oh, thanks.

   9. JRJoe Rogan0:19

      It was fun to see it.

   10. JDJeff Dye0:20

       Yeah. I c- I, um, uh, I was telling them before you got here that, like, it's very rare that I'm ner- like, got a little nerves.

   11. JRJoe Rogan0:28

       Yeah, that club's weird.

   12. JDJeff Dye0:29

       And so when I, when I came out there, I was like, "Yeah, this is a big deal." You know? Like, I, I don't ... It's been a while since I've had some nerves and I was coming out there going, "Oh." It took me, like, about 30, 40 long seconds to really dial in and go, "All right."

   13. JRJoe Rogan0:40

       (laughs)

   14. JDJeff Dye0:40

       I was kind of having to add in my head, going, "Joe's watching and, uh, I hope this goes well." You know? 'Cause it's such a beautiful club. The, uh, the bar's high.

   15. JRJoe Rogan0:47

       Yeah.

   16. JDJeff Dye0:48

       All that whole crowd's going, "Oh, we, you know, we're gonna see everybody. Tom Segura, Joe Rogan, we're gonna see-"

   17. JRJoe Rogan0:52

       You followed Brian Simpson too, who's-

   18. JDJeff Dye0:54

       Yeah.

   19. JRJoe Rogan0:55

       ... like, really funk- really fucking on fire right now.

   20. JDJeff Dye0:58

       I was just very, very, uh, it was just cool. It was cool to be in that... You got a torch?

   21. JRJoe Rogan1:02

       Yeah. Yeah, there's one right there. This is his torch.

   22. JDJeff Dye1:03

       Oh, that's a torch too?

   23. JRJoe Rogan1:04

       Yeah, that's a torch. There you go.

   24. JDJeff Dye1:05

       Oh, look at you. You got all the gadgets, huh?

   25. JRJoe Rogan1:07

       Yeah, we're, we, uh, shout out to Foundation Cigars. They, they actually made us some Comedy Mothership-logoed cigars. (lighter clicking) They're really good. Is it out? Yeah, here, try this one.

   26. JDJeff Dye1:18

       There you go.

   27. JRJoe Rogan1:18

       Sorry. (lighter hissing) It might be almost out of juice.

   28. JDJeff Dye1:24

       Got it.

   29. JRJoe Rogan1:25

       But, um, yeah, I get it. I was nervous when I first did s- stand up there too.

   30. JDJeff Dye1:30

       Yeah, it's like that. What-
2. 15:00 – 30:00

   Mm-hmm. …

   1. JRJoe Rogan15:00

      of, you know, a little corner area and sound's coming from a speaker pointed in a specific direction-

   2. JDJeff Dye15:04

      Mm-hmm.

   3. JRJoe Rogan15:05

      ... it's probably not set up for comedy is what I'm trying to say. So, we decided to just set it up from the jump.

   4. JDJeff Dye15:10

      That's great.

   5. JRJoe Rogan15:11

      Like, the best way we could, you know, the whole tunnel system, the whole, there, there's an elevator.

   6. JDJeff Dye15:17

      It's perfect. It's literally, you've made, it's a masterpiece.

   7. JRJoe Rogan15:20

      Yeah. So when we r- opened it, it was, it was nerve-wracking. It was like, "What are we doing?" (laughs)

   8. JDJeff Dye15:24

      Me and my buddy, Brant, uh, this was literally last weekend? I think it was last weekend. We were playing a club, and the club's great. I don't wanna name it because I'm about to say something that's not great about the acoustics. But he gets onstage, he's crushing, and he's doing all these little bullshit savers, you know? Like, "Well, I did better last week." You know those little things you say?

   9. JRJoe Rogan15:43

      Yeah, yeah.

   10. JDJeff Dye15:43

       After a joke does bad, and the crowd's looking around going, "What was he talking about?" So then, he does another joke and then he's like, "All right, you guys don't like..." You know, and he keeps narrating. But I'm like, "Brant, you're crushing." But I, I can't talk to him. He's onstage. And so then, I get onstage and, uh, and I'm like, "Fucking tough crowd, man. What's going on here?" Like, t- l- these...

   11. JRJoe Rogan16:01

       Oh, you can't hear them.

   12. JDJeff Dye16:03

       Couldn't hear, I c- I thought I was doing bad and Brant's like, "You're, that was amazing." And then Brant was doing amazing and he thought he was doing bad up there. So we came up with like, a symbol for the next shows. Like, if, if you're doing-

   13. JRJoe Rogan16:16

       How, how far was the audience far, from you that you couldn't hear them?

   14. JDJeff Dye16:18

       We heard laughs. We heard laughs.

   15. JRJoe Rogan16:20

       Right.

   16. JDJeff Dye16:20

       But we just don't, we're, we're used to a sound, as a comedian-

   17. JRJoe Rogan16:24

       Right, a volume.

   18. JDJeff Dye16:24

       ... like, of what killing is.

   19. JRJoe Rogan16:25

       Mm-hmm.

   20. JDJeff Dye16:26

       So, you know, you're getting, we get laughs on every sentence. Doesn't mean you're killing.

   21. JRJoe Rogan16:29

       Mm-hmm.

   22. JDJeff Dye16:30

       And so, we were just saying, so me and Brant came up with like, a code. We're like, "All right, this means don't worry about it, you're doing good." And if it is that the joke sucked or the bit sucks, we'll give, we'll do this like, "Hey, it's you." (laughs)

   23. JRJoe Rogan16:39

       (laughs)

   24. JDJeff Dye16:39

       "It's you that is, uh..." Yeah. But like, you need to know-

   25. JRJoe Rogan16:43

       That's a good ... (laughs)

   26. JDJeff Dye16:43

       ... is it me or is it the crowd? I-

   27. JRJoe Rogan16:46

       You get like, a line coach.

   28. JDJeff Dye16:47

       Yeah. We like, like, as we're going-

   29. JRJoe Rogan16:49

       That's hilarious.

   30. JDJeff Dye16:49

       ... you know, we signal.
3. 30:00 – 45:00

   Oh, so that's how…

   1. JRJoe Rogan30:00

      appendix with a punch.

   2. JDJeff Dye30:01

      Oh, so that's how it happened.

   3. JRJoe Rogan30:03

      Which is the inflammation of the abdominal wall. His appendix was removed, but the poison from the ruptured appendix was already in his bloodstream.

   4. JDJeff Dye30:09

      Geez.

   5. JRJoe Rogan30:10

      Maybe, uh, I mean, it makes sense. I know guys, uh, lose their spleens from, uh, really bad accidents. You can, you know, 'cause, if your body gets damaged, like, they could, they could remove your spleen. It might be like it fucks your appendix up too. I mean, it makes sense. If something's hitting it.

   6. JDJeff Dye30:27

      These UFC guys, I mean, the f- the blows they take for this kinda stuff.

   7. JRJoe Rogan30:32

      Dude, dude.... is you get too accustomed to it. It's li- yo- it's so, uh, normal for me to see guys fight. It's- it's weird. It's real weird. Like, I'm super accustomed to it. But it really is shocking.

   8. JDJeff Dye30:45

      It is.

   9. JRJoe Rogan30:46

      If you just step back and watch, like, a real high-level fight-

   10. JDJeff Dye30:49

       Yeah.

   11. JRJoe Rogan30:49

       ... and the impact. It'd be-

   12. JDJeff Dye30:50

       Terrifying.

   13. JRJoe Rogan30:50

       ... shocking.

   14. JDJeff Dye30:51

       If it was dogs, it'd be illegal.

   15. JRJoe Rogan30:54

       Right.

   16. JDJeff Dye30:54

       Like, you watch UFC fight, you go, "You know, we couldn't do this if this was dogs."

   17. JRJoe Rogan30:57

       (laughs)

   18. JDJeff Dye30:57

       Like, like, I can't believe (laughs) , I can't believe what-

   19. JRJoe Rogan31:00

       Right.

   20. JDJeff Dye31:00

       ... and there's people gathered around, people gam-

   21. JRJoe Rogan31:01

       Right.

   22. JDJeff Dye31:01

       ... gamblers, you know, going-

   23. JRJoe Rogan31:02

       Blood-like.

   24. JDJeff Dye31:03

       ... "Ah, yeah, yeah."

   25. JRJoe Rogan31:03

       (laughs) .

   26. JDJeff Dye31:03

       And, uh, and- and you're just going, "I don't think that this should be a- allowed."

   27. JRJoe Rogan31:08

       Right.

   28. JDJeff Dye31:08

       But they- they do.

   29. JRJoe Rogan31:09

       No.

   30. JDJeff Dye31:09

       It's wild.
4. 45:00 – 1:00:00

   Look at them, fat…

   1. JRJoe Rogan45:00

      Khan w-... Like, one of his titles was he who rules in all... There was like something about felt houses. So, the, it... the... They had such disdain for people who lived in houses.

   2. JDJeff Dye45:14

      Look at them, fat cats with their houses.

   3. JRJoe Rogan45:16

      Yeah, they all lived in tents.

   4. JDJeff Dye45:18

      Yeah.

   5. JRJoe Rogan45:18

      They lived in felt tents, so they never had houses. They thought you were a pussy-

   6. JDJeff Dye45:22

      Yeah.

   7. JRJoe Rogan45:23

      ... if you lived in a house.

   8. JDJeff Dye45:24

      Yeah, they're... You're, you're too protected.

   9. JRJoe Rogan45:26

      Yeah. So like, and you think about how horrific the Mongol Empire was and what they did, the M-... I mean, the Mongols killed-

   10. JDJeff Dye45:34

       Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

   11. JRJoe Rogan45:34

       ... somewhere around 50 to 70 million people during Genghis Khan's life. They reduced the populatio- population of the planet by 10%.

   12. JDJeff Dye45:42

       Ugh.

   13. JRJoe Rogan45:42

       They changed the carbon footprint, dude.

   14. JDJeff Dye45:44

       I think Hitler gets too much credit.

   15. JRJoe Rogan45:46

       (laughs)

   16. JDJeff Dye45:46

       That's the one everyone knows. Everyone wants to reference Hitler. Nobody is talking about Napoleon or-

   17. JRJoe Rogan45:50

       What about what Stalin did?

   18. JDJeff Dye45:52

       ... Mussolini or-

   19. JRJoe Rogan45:53

       Yeah.

   20. JDJeff Dye45:53

       ... or Stalin-

   21. JRJoe Rogan45:54

       Mm-hmm.

   22. JDJeff Dye45:54

       ... or even the Mongol-

   23. JRJoe Rogan45:55

       Mm-hmm.

   24. JDJeff Dye45:55

       Like, you know what I'm saying? Like-

   25. JRJoe Rogan45:56

       Yeah.

   26. JDJeff Dye45:56

       ... those ones don't get enough kind of like... You know, like...

   27. JRJoe Rogan45:59

       Well, I j- I would... I used to have a joke about it, like that you could be a pirate for Halloween. Like, like do you know how crazy it is? Like, pirates are the f-... some of the most fucking evil creatures that ever existed.

   28. JDJeff Dye46:09

       (laughs) They're the most famous rapists.

   29. JRJoe Rogan46:11

       Yeah.

   30. JDJeff Dye46:11

       That's what... If you go, "What do pirates do?"
5. 1:00:00 – 1:04:38

   Mm-hmm. …

   1. JRJoe Rogan1:00:00

      And we know that we don't wanna do that anymore.

   2. JDJeff Dye1:00:02

      Mm-hmm.

   3. JRJoe Rogan1:00:02

      So, we have to find other ways of doing it.

   4. JDJeff Dye1:00:04

      A little game.

   5. JRJoe Rogan1:00:04

      Yeah, so I think the aliens would realize like, "Oh, their human reward system got hijacked for something that doesn't even matter."

   6. JDJeff Dye1:00:12

      Right.

   7. JRJoe Rogan1:00:12

      Look at, like, I play pool, right? I love pool. But w- and when I play it, it's like, if you watch, it's like, why do you give a fuck if the ball goes in the hole?

   8. JDJeff Dye1:00:20

      Well, it's the goal.

   9. JRJoe Rogan1:00:20

      It's so stupid.

   10. JDJeff Dye1:00:21

       Yeah.

   11. JRJoe Rogan1:00:21

       Right. But it's this coordinated mind effort thing that ignites that part of the brain that wants you to be good at war.

   12. JDJeff Dye1:00:33

       Hmm.

   13. JRJoe Rogan1:00:33

       That's why we love competition. W- that's why we watch, like, like, watch. It's like a built-in reward system in our mind. And then also, like, if we're a society that's constantly looking to innovate, we're, we're constantly looking for people that are pushing the boundaries of whatever they do, whether it's music, whatever they do.

   14. JDJeff Dye1:00:51

       Okay.

   15. JRJoe Rogan1:00:51

       Comedy.

   16. JDJeff Dye1:00:51

       Yeah.

   17. JRJoe Rogan1:00:52

       Pushing the boundary, like someone who's at the front of the line, just out there chasing it.

   18. JDJeff Dye1:00:56

       Yeah.

   19. JRJoe Rogan1:00:56

       Because that sort of applies to society as a whole. So, if someone's doing that in a very public sphere, like playing in the NFL, that's, that, that ex- it, it, it excites the energy of the people to do more things. And I think it's like a tribal-

   20. JDJeff Dye1:01:12

       Yeah.

   21. JRJoe Rogan1:01:12

       ... like, reward system that's in our head, too.

   22. JDJeff Dye1:01:14

       That's interesting. Yeah. Like a little mini ...

   23. JRJoe Rogan1:01:16

       Yeah. So I think the aliens would recognize that.

   24. JDJeff Dye1:01:19

       I hope, yeah, I hope-

   25. JRJoe Rogan1:01:19

       I think they would say, "This is probably a normal progression of, you know, territorial apes, then territorial apes with nuclear (laughs) weapons."

   26. JDJeff Dye1:01:27

       (laughs) .

   27. JRJoe Rogan1:01:27

       "And then territorial apes that eventually evolve and then go out into the stars."

   28. JDJeff Dye1:01:31

       Yeah.

   29. JRJoe Rogan1:01:31

       That's probably, it's probably how it always had to happen.

   30. JDJeff Dye1:01:34

       Yeah. They go, "Neither one of them died, and that one's better."

Episode duration: 2:30:44