Joe Rogan Experience #2131 - Brian Simpson

1. 0:00 – 15:00

   (drum roll) Joe Rogan podcast,…

   1. JRJoe Rogan0:00

      (drum roll) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.

   2. BSBrian Simpson0:04

      The Joe Rogan Experience.

   3. NANarrator0:06

      Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. (rock music)

   4. BSBrian Simpson0:13

      Let's go.

   5. JRJoe Rogan0:13

      One, two, three. Let's go.

   6. BSBrian Simpson0:13

      Netflix special- Netflix special-

   7. JRJoe Rogan0:14

      What's up?

   8. BSBrian Simpson0:15

      ... live from-

   9. JRJoe Rogan0:16

      What's up?

   10. BSBrian Simpson0:16

       ... live from the mothership, streaming on Netflix right now.

   11. JRJoe Rogan0:19

       The first special live from the mothership-

   12. BSBrian Simpson0:22

       Yeah.

   13. JRJoe Rogan0:22

       ... to be streamed on Netflix.

   14. BSBrian Simpson0:23

       Yeah, man.

   15. JRJoe Rogan0:24

       How's that? (laughs)

   16. BSBrian Simpson0:24

       It's exciting, man.

   17. JRJoe Rogan0:26

       It's great too, man.

   18. BSBrian Simpson0:27

       Yeah, yeah.

   19. JRJoe Rogan0:27

       You nailed it.

   20. BSBrian Simpson0:28

       It's great.

   21. JRJoe Rogan0:28

       You fucking nailed it.

   22. BSBrian Simpson0:30

       It's been a good... Got a good positive response from the comedy community too.

   23. JRJoe Rogan0:33

       Beautiful.

   24. BSBrian Simpson0:33

       Yeah, yeah.

   25. JRJoe Rogan0:34

       Beautiful.

   26. BSBrian Simpson0:35

       Everybody's loving it. Yeah, this is gonna keep going... Keep, keep, keep getting stronger now.

   27. JRJoe Rogan0:39

       (laughs) I know, it's such a nice feeling, man. It's such a... It's so nice to watch this happen for you, because, you know, you were one of the guys that came out here early. You took a early risk.

   28. BSBrian Simpson0:48

       Yeah.

   29. JRJoe Rogan0:49

       You know, a lot of people in the beginning were like, "What the fuck is everybody doing moving to Texas in the middle of the pandemic?"

   30. BSBrian Simpson0:56

       Yeah, but you know, honestly, it didn't feel like that big of a risk. Well, maybe at the time. I don't remember, man. But it, it felt like a easy decision when I made it. But it was a last minute thing. I, I literally... From the time I decided to move, like I was... I'm moving, to the time I moved, I think it was like a month.
2. 15:00 – 30:00

   Imagine the fucking ego…

   1. JRJoe Rogan15:00

      your, your reference points.

   2. BSBrian Simpson15:02

      Imagine the fucking ego you have to have to be, to be that kind of pilot.

   3. JRJoe Rogan15:06

      Well, they're all men.

   4. BSBrian Simpson15:07

      Yeah.

   5. JRJoe Rogan15:08

      These are men, men. These are like jacked men who are like real friendly and super polite, and they always drink their water, and they always get their pull-ups in. These are-

   6. BSBrian Simpson15:19

      Yeah.

   7. JRJoe Rogan15:19

      These guys are men.

   8. BSBrian Simpson15:21

      Yeah.

   9. JRJoe Rogan15:21

      And they have a full gym set up there. These guys are in shape constantly. You do not get out of shape if you're doing that. You cannot get out of shape. It's too hard. Bro, it's bananas-

   10. BSBrian Simpson15:32

       Yeah.

   11. JRJoe Rogan15:32

       ... how hard it is.

   12. BSBrian Simpson15:33

       You miss, you miss one hook, you dead.

   13. JRJoe Rogan15:35

       You're dead.

   14. BSBrian Simpson15:35

       Huh, huh.

   15. JRJoe Rogan15:36

       And you're gonna have to eject, and you're gonna give up that you crashed a $1 billion jet or whatever the fuck those things cost. Didn't somebody crash recently? There's a couple crashes. There was one where a guy had to eject, like it lost power or something like that, so he ejects and it slams into the mountains of North Carolina. It was crazy. Yeah, it just ran out of gas and-

   16. BSBrian Simpson15:59

       And it's gone.

   17. JRJoe Rogan15:59

       ... slammed in the mountains, but, but the guy parachuted down, I believe, in that one. And then there was another one more recent, uh, before that rather, uh, not as m- not as recent, where there was like this crazy fiery crash and like they were doing tests, and a guy lost control of the jet. Bro, you could lose control of one of those things.

   18. BSBrian Simpson16:17

       No warranty.

   19. JRJoe Rogan16:18

       Dude, I'm telling you, when you're in it, it y- it's not what I thought. I thought you like (grunts) just fucking spirit. No, it's the physical force on your body. It's insane. Insane.

   20. BSBrian Simpson16:31

       Yeah. There's no way I would do it for a living.

   21. JRJoe Rogan16:32

       That's why the UFO shit is so perplexing because whatever those things are, if they're ours, nobody's in them. No fucking chance. No chance. Nobody's in those things because you would be turned into jello (snaps fingers) like that.

   22. BSBrian Simpson16:47

       From going, from changing directions so quickly?

   23. JRJoe Rogan16:49

       What they're doing is moving at a s- what was it like that they estimated the Tic Tac to go? I think it was 13,000 Gs. Something insane where it moves so fast 'cause it went from, supposedly went from above our atmosphere, which is like above 50,000 feet, down to like 50 feet (pops mouth) in a second.

   24. BSBrian Simpson17:11

       And didn't crash?

   25. JRJoe Rogan17:12

       Not only didn't crash, stopped dead and hovered. They're like, what, what can do that? And what happens to the people that are in that? You're gone, bro. You're mist. You're pink mist.

   26. BSBrian Simpson17:24

       Oh, yeah.

   27. JRJoe Rogan17:24

       You're like those people in that submarine (imitates explosion) .

   28. BSBrian Simpson17:26

       Man.

   29. JRJoe Rogan17:28

       You just splat.

   30. BSBrian Simpson17:29

       Bro, I just, speaking of that shit, I just watched a, I just watched a YouTube video about another fucking incident. What's the name of it?
3. 30:00 – 45:00

   Yeah, make all the…

   1. JRJoe Rogan30:00

      know, like, it's just about being funny. I know there's all this other stuff that gets wrapped up into it because you're trying to establish your identity, and you're trying to let people know how you feel about things, and you want to make sure everybody knows you're on the right side. But really what you should be doing is just doing comedy.... do comedy. And if you figure out a way to make your points hilarious, great.

   2. BSBrian Simpson30:22

      Yeah, make all the points in the world.

   3. JRJoe Rogan30:24

      But they gotta be funny.

   4. BSBrian Simpson30:26

      (laughs)

   5. JRJoe Rogan30:26

      And when you do Kill Tony, you have one minute. You got one minute. And it sorta establishes an ideal in these young comics' minds that, "Hey, it's really just about making these people laugh. And if I can get good enough where I can make my ideas funny, and I can make these people laugh with ideas-"

   6. BSBrian Simpson30:45

      Oh, yeah.

   7. JRJoe Rogan30:45

      ... then it's like what you do. That's like black belt shit.

   8. BSBrian Simpson30:47

      Well, it kills me that the... Because the amount of balls it takes for... W- the amount of people that go on Kill Tony, and it's their first time doing comedy ever-

   9. JRJoe Rogan30:56

      Mm-hmm.

   10. BSBrian Simpson30:57

       ... I'm like, "Bro, that's a hell of a way to do your first open mic" is in front of millions of people.

   11. JRJoe Rogan31:02

       Yeah, that's a crazy way to do an open mic. It doesn't make any sense.

   12. BSBrian Simpson31:06

       Bro.

   13. JRJoe Rogan31:06

       But if you can do it, wow, what a feeling that must be.

   14. BSBrian Simpson31:09

       What if he-

   15. JRJoe Rogan31:09

       W- we've, we've seen people do it. We've seen people change their lives.

   16. BSBrian Simpson31:12

       Yeah, if you nail it.

   17. JRJoe Rogan31:13

       Bro, William Montgomery is killing it on the road right now.

   18. BSBrian Simpson31:16

       Yeah.

   19. JRJoe Rogan31:16

       He's killing it. He's selling out. He's doing a whole hour. We mean-

   20. BSBrian Simpson31:21

       William, Hans.

   21. JRJoe Rogan31:21

       ... we saw him, we saw him when... Yeah, Hans is killing it. We saw William when he had to have notes on stage. And we... Remember, we, we kept telling him.

   22. BSBrian Simpson31:28

       Yeah.

   23. JRJoe Rogan31:29

       "You can't have notes on stage. You can't hold your notes and read them." And some people were saying, "No, that's a part of his act." I go, "No, no, it's holding him back," because on Kill Tony, he doesn't have the notes, and he comes out and stares the audience down, and he's dangerous, and he's weird. I'm like, "That's you when you're at your best."

   24. BSBrian Simpson31:45

       Right.

   25. JRJoe Rogan31:45

       He said, "I'm worried I'm gonna forget my jokes." I go, "You're not gonna forget your jokes. You do them every night. You're a com- you're a professional comedian."

   26. BSBrian Simpson31:52

       (laughs) Yeah.

   27. JRJoe Rogan31:52

       "This is part of the thing you have to learn."

   28. BSBrian Simpson31:54

       Yeah.

   29. JRJoe Rogan31:54

       "Like, you can't race in Le Mans with training wheels on. You can't."

   30. BSBrian Simpson31:59

       Yeah. William's been on... He's been on a fucking tear lately.
4. 45:00 – 1:00:00

   Yeah. …

   1. JRJoe Rogan45:00

      and he's gonna hang on, and he's gonna just fucking crush him to sleep. And he's asleep right there. D- dude, that is so insane.

   2. BSBrian Simpson45:10

      Yeah.

   3. JRJoe Rogan45:10

      That is so insane. That, that is one of the most legendary finishing sequences in all of Jiu-Jitsu history 'cause that was, like, the moment Marcelo Garcia, who's, like, one of the greatest of all time, bursts onto the scene.

   4. BSBrian Simpson45:23

      And he just locked in.

   5. JRJoe Rogan45:25

      Yeah. So that guy, even he has cauliflower ear. (laughs)

   6. BSBrian Simpson45:29

      Oh.

   7. JRJoe Rogan45:29

      As good as he is. As good as he is.

   8. BSBrian Simpson45:32

      Yeah. You can't re- it, it seems, like, unavoidable.

   9. JRJoe Rogan45:34

      Yeah. Some guys don't get it. It's weird. And some guys are just real big guys. Some real big guys never get caught, you know? Real strong guys.

   10. BSBrian Simpson45:42

       Yeah. Well, that's why, like, every time I s- whenever I see somebody with cauliflower ears, like, I, I know two things. I know, one, they can probably fight. Almost definitely. And two, they have some kind of old nagging injury that they're hoping I don't discover.

   11. JRJoe Rogan45:55

       (laughs)

   12. BSBrian Simpson45:57

       You know what I mean? L- like all the most dangerous dudes are like, "If s- if any- if anyone hits me in my fucking-"

   13. JRJoe Rogan46:03

       Left knee.

   14. BSBrian Simpson46:04

       Right. (laughs)

   15. JRJoe Rogan46:04

       Yeah. (laughs)

   16. BSBrian Simpson46:05

       Then, they will fold me the fuck up. So I, I'm, I'm s- that's why I'm scared. That's why I don't fuck with those people. Like old n- dude, don't fuck with them because they gonna fight, they gonna give you everything they got s- to, so, 'cause they don't want you, they don't want the fight to go so long that you find that injury.

   17. JRJoe Rogan46:18

       Yeah.

   18. BSBrian Simpson46:18

       Yeah.

   19. JRJoe Rogan46:18

       Also, like, don't just be fucking with people thinking it's a fair fight. People stab people, they shoot people. Just don't do it. Just don't do it, man. If you wanna prove yourself, go to a gym.

   20. BSBrian Simpson46:29

       Right.

   21. JRJoe Rogan46:29

       Go to a gym. Learn how to fight. And then you will lose all of your desire to do that in a bar.

   22. BSBrian Simpson46:34

       Especially if- after 30 'cause-

   23. JRJoe Rogan46:37

       I don't give a fuck if you're 20. Don't do it. Don't fucking do it.

   24. BSBrian Simpson46:40

       Yeah.

   25. JRJoe Rogan46:40

       Man, it's how people die.

   26. BSBrian Simpson46:42

       20-somethings.

   27. JRJoe Rogan46:42

       It's how people get locked up in jail for the rest of their lives. It's how-

   28. BSBrian Simpson46:45

       20-somethings though, they can't, you can't tell a 20-year-old.

   29. JRJoe Rogan46:47

       Yeah, you can.

   30. BSBrian Simpson46:48

       Yeah?
5. 1:00:00 – 1:09:57

   Is, is this... Is…

   1. JRJoe Rogan1:00:00

   2. BSBrian Simpson1:00:00

      Is, is this... Is this the one where he finally gets knocked out?

   3. JRJoe Rogan1:00:06

      I don't know, but Doug DeWitt was a very solid fighter, but Tommy Hearns is just next level. Tommy Hearns has the most ridiculous back. Look at that back. That's where all that power comes from, dude. Look how wide he is. So, when Tommy was 147, I think this was a middleweight fight, which was 160, but you gotta realize, like, Tommy, when he fought Sugar Ray, he was 147. When he fought, like, Papino, Cuevas, and all those other dudes, dude, he was, he was very light. He was-

   4. BSBrian Simpson1:00:36

      Uh-huh.

   5. JRJoe Rogan1:00:36

      But he was that tall with that kind of power. So, look at the, uh, Tommy Hearns is teeing off on Doug DeWitt.... I'm telling you, m- most people who fought Doug DeWitt were stunned by the amount of power that guy could just absorb. He just, uh, he was a really good fighter. And it wasn't like he was a bad fighter, he just wasn't, like, world championship caliber.

   6. BSBrian Simpson1:01:01

      Where is he now?

   7. JRJoe Rogan1:01:03

      Who knows, man. It's not good at the end.

   8. BSBrian Simpson1:01:05

      No.

   9. JRJoe Rogan1:01:06

      It's not good at the end. I was reading about this, uh, this boxer from the '80s who was living in LA. And, you know, they would have to almost, like, put string on him to make sure he didn't travel too far away from the house. Like, he would get lost on his block. He didn't know what was going on.

   10. BSBrian Simpson1:01:23

       Hmm.

   11. JRJoe Rogan1:01:23

       He just, his brain is just gone. It's just gone.

   12. BSBrian Simpson1:01:28

       Yeah, the price they pay, man.

   13. JRJoe Rogan1:01:30

       It's the craziest price.

   14. BSBrian Simpson1:01:31

       For the chance at greatness.

   15. JRJoe Rogan1:01:33

       The craziest price. And you never know when you've crossed the line. You never know when you've crossed the line into your brain's not gonna return. You know?

   16. BSBrian Simpson1:01:41

       Yeah.

   17. JRJoe Rogan1:01:41

       In the beginning, you don't even notice a slip, you know? You're just like, "Ah, I'm just tired from training." You know? You don't even notice. You know, and other people start noticing it. And maybe when you have a drink in you, you can't really form sentences that well.

   18. BSBrian Simpson1:01:53

       Mm-hmm.

   19. JRJoe Rogan1:01:54

       You know? Like, uh, one drink, and all of a sudden, you're slurring your words. And everybody's like, "What's going on with Mike?"

   20. BSBrian Simpson1:02:00

       Hmm.

   21. JRJoe Rogan1:02:00

       "Ah, he just had a couple." No, he had one fucking drink. Like, he's slurring his words, like something's going on. That's like one of the first things you see. And then, it keeps going. The, the damage doesn't get better over time, it gets worse. And they say that a lot of the brain damage doesn't even, like, show itself till, like, years after the actual impact of whatever the fuck happened.

   22. BSBrian Simpson1:02:20

       Hmm. Yeah.

   23. JRJoe Rogan1:02:22

       Dudes start doing wild shit. They start gambling, start doing coke, start going crazy.

   24. BSBrian Simpson1:02:27

       But then some people are just fine, right?

   25. JRJoe Rogan1:02:28

       Some people are fine. Yeah. Yeah, it's weird. It's weird. Some people retire, and they had long careers, and they can talk fine. And they're, they're great, you know?

   26. BSBrian Simpson1:02:37

       Yeah.

   27. JRJoe Rogan1:02:37

       Look at Andre Ward.

   28. BSBrian Simpson1:02:38

       I know. That's why... And you can see, like, whatever brain cells Floyd Mayweather's father had left, he was like, "I'm gonna make sure this don't happen to my son."

   29. JRJoe Rogan1:02:47

       Yeah.

   30. BSBrian Simpson1:02:48

       Yeah. It's like, of course he had-

Episode duration: 3:11:21