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Joe Rogan Experience #2176 - Chad Daniels

Chad Daniels is a stand-up comic and a host of the "Middle of Somewhere" and "Pretend Problems" podcasts. Watch his new special, "Empty Nester," on Netflix. www.chaddaniels.com

Joe RoganhostChad Danielsguest
Jul 17, 20242h 43mWatch on YouTube ↗

EVERY SPOKEN WORD

  1. 0:0015:00

    (drumming music) Joe Rogan podcast,…

    1. NA

      (drumming music) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.

    2. NA

      The Joe Rogan Experience.

    3. JR

      Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. (rock music) Hello, Chad.

    4. CD

      Hi.

    5. JR

      What's happening, man?

    6. CD

      Nothing much.

    7. JR

      Nice to meet you in person.

    8. CD

      Yeah, likewise.

    9. JR

      Um, we were already chatting about how Google, uh, is totally listening to me.

    10. CD

      Right.

    11. JR

      Confirmed 100%. 'Cause your Google News feed is always, like, stuff that you're interested in-

    12. CD

      Mm-hmm, yep.

    13. JR

      ... pretty much. But I was having a conversation with my wife about purses, and she was explaining to me that certain purses, like, you can't just buy the purse. You have to develop a relationship with a store owner. I'm like, "What?"

    14. CD

      I don't get that.

    15. JR

      That's, uh-

    16. CD

      You'd think if you're trying to sell stuff, you would wanna sell it right when they came in.

    17. JR

      Exactly. I don't get it. But, like, there's a thing that certain, like, posh people really love, and it's exclusivity.

    18. CD

      Sure.

    19. JR

      They love it. "I'm the only one that can get this watch."

    20. CD

      Mm-hmm.

    21. JR

      "I'm the only one that can get this fucking purse or whatever it is." So anyway, all of a sudden, Google starts showing me purse things.

    22. CD

      (laughs)

    23. JR

      They start showing me all this stuff about purses. I didn't, I didn't look anything up about purses.

    24. CD

      Yeah.

    25. JR

      I just had a conversation with the phone sitting at the dinner table. That's crazy.

    26. CD

      Yeah, happens all the time. I mean-

    27. JR

      It's weird, li-

    28. CD

      ... it ends up in your feed, you're like, "Oh, my forearms are too small."

    29. JR

      Ha.

    30. CD

      Next thing you know, you got these flexi deals-

  2. 15:0030:00

    (laughs) …

    1. JR

      was written for fake people. It was written in some weird way for people that don't exist.

    2. CD

      (laughs)

    3. JR

      I was like, "You're trying so hard to make people talk and think this way. These aren't real people."

    4. CD

      Yeah.

    5. JR

      "This is bu- bizarre." Like, every person in this movie is totally disingenuous. Like, every word that you wrote for them-

    6. CD

      (laughs)

    7. JR

      ... is not like anything people ever say.

    8. CD

      (laughing) Right.

    9. JR

      This s- movie sucks. It fucking sucks. And it looks like you wrote it on Adderall-

    10. CD

      (laughs)

    11. JR

      ... and y- you're just trying to make some money. And that... Why am I here, you know? (laughs)

    12. CD

      Yeah. Have you seen the show Suits?

    13. JR

      I have not.

    14. CD

      Okay, so they say... They have this really weird cadence where, uh, they'll say, "And I'm not gonna goddamn do it." They use goddamn (thudding sound) in front of stuff. And it's... But it's every character.

    15. JR

      Oh, God.

    16. CD

      And so you're like, "How did all these people meet that use goddamn or something?"

    17. JR

      Is it from the '20s or something?

    18. CD

      Uh, no, it's, it's like...

    19. JR

      It's current?

    20. CD

      Yeah, it's-

    21. JR

      Oh, that's where they're doing it.

    22. CD

      I think it's still on. I think it just had a, a thing come on it.

    23. JR

      Oh, that's bad writing.

    24. CD

      That was-

    25. JR

      Or a bunch of people that are, like, really im- easily influenced, you know?

    26. CD

      Yeah.

    27. JR

      That's like, that's where accents come from, like one fucking dude probably talked a certain way and everybody's like-

    28. CD

      (laughs)

    29. JR

      ... "That guy sounds cool." (laughs)

    30. CD

      I was-

  3. 30:0045:00

    Yeah. …

    1. JR

      not, that's not my grandpa.

    2. CD

      Yeah.

    3. JR

      He's gone.

    4. CD

      Yeah, when they go, "Oh, he looks so natural." "Well, he wasn't-"

    5. JR

      Fuck.

    6. CD

      "... fucking orange when I knew him."

    7. JR

      Fuck no.

    8. CD

      Uh-uh.

    9. JR

      No, he does not look natural. He looks weird.

    10. CD

      Yeah.

    11. JR

      There's, like, a part of you that knows that whatever a person is in their soul, whatever a soul is, it's off.

    12. CD

      Yeah, that's gone.

    13. JR

      It's off.

    14. CD

      Yeah.

    15. JR

      Yeah, it's gone. And it's weird. It's a weird feeling that you get when you're around a dead body. It's like, mm.

    16. CD

      Especially one that you knew so well.

    17. JR

      Oh, yeah.... it's a wake up call, you know, because you just realize like, "Oh my God." Like, this is, this happens, this comes for everyone. One day, everyone in your life-

    18. CD

      Yeah.

    19. JR

      ... is gonna go like that.

    20. CD

      (laughs)

    21. JR

      And if you're lucky, you're gonna see it. Is that what the luck is? You know, if you live long enough.

    22. CD

      Yeah.

    23. JR

      I was, um, switching phone numbers the other day. And I was going over my phone, my, uh, my contact list and there's so many people in there that are dead. I, I kept pulling out people that were dead. I was like, "Oh, he's gone. Oh, he's gone."

    24. CD

      Goddamn.

    25. JR

      It was crazy.

    26. CD

      How long, how long has it been since you switched last time?

    27. JR

      Well, it's just... I got a bunch of old numbers, you know, from dudes that I haven't talked to in forever that, you know, you just-

    28. CD

      Yeah.

    29. JR

      ... when you have an, an iPhone you just keep getting a new number-

    30. CD

      Yeah.

  4. 45:001:00:00

    Yeah. …

    1. JR

    2. CD

      Yeah.

    3. JR

      ... Teddy Atlasan. He told me that Mi- when Mike was 13, he was knocking out grown men. And they wouldn't believe he was 13. He'd bring him to boxing tournaments. They were like, "How old's that kid?" He goes, "13." He goes, (smacks lips) "He's fucking 16." He goes, "Okay, he's 16." He- he put him in with the 16-year-olds, he'd knock-

    4. CD

      (laughs)

    5. JR

      ... the 16-year-olds out. Yeah, he was a freak. So you have that sometimes, you know, you have kids that just have extraordinary genes. And then you have this perfect storm of a very intelligent person who was deeply neglected as a child and then adopted by a genius. Not just a boxing genius, but a genius in terms of psychology and life and philosophy, and he understood war. And, like, he- he was a war historian-

    6. CD

      Okay.

    7. JR

      ... and he was a boxing historian, and he was also managed by this guy, Jim Jeffries, or Jim Jacobs, rather. Excuse me. And Jim Jacobs had Jim Jeffries' tapes, or, uh, James Jeffries. He had, um, like, uh, Jack Johnson and, uh-

    8. CD

      Oh, wow.

    9. JR

      ... Jack Dempsey. He had all the film footage of, like, fighters that... Uh, the... some of the greatest boxers of all time. Willie Pep, you know, Floyd Patterson. He had all this old footage on reels, and he was like the biggest collector of old boxing footage. And Mike was being managed by him, so Mike would sit there all day and watch Jack Dempsey fight-

    10. CD

      Mm-hmm.

    11. JR

      ... watch Jack Johnson fight, watch Stanley Grebb, watch these old, old killers. You know, these, like, these guys that existed, you know, decades ago, and no one gets a chance to see them.

    12. CD

      Yeah.

    13. JR

      'Cause, you know, we're talking about 1980, you don't even have VHS tapes, right? When did they come along? They were like, '82 or something like that, right? So he's getting, like... This is happening to him in the '70s, like late '70s. Like, s- let's make sense of this. So he's 58, he's a year older than me. And s- well, so how old was he when he was 13? What- what year was it when he was 13, rather?

    14. CD

      So he was born in '66.

    15. NA

      I think I was born in 1966, so I'd have been 79.

    16. JR

      79.

    17. CD

      Yeah.

    18. JR

      Okay, no VHS. So he's... The only way you can see these things is if they put them on television, which they might, but then you have to watch it while it's on TV. You can't rewatch it again. Y-

    19. CD

      Yeah. Right.

    20. JR

      ... there's no way to record anything. Or you know Jim Jacobs. (laughs) If you know Jim Jacobs-

    21. CD

      Oh, my God. (laughs)

    22. JR

      Jim Jacobs-

    23. CD

      The cheat code.

    24. JR

      ... who also did the commentary in a lot of those. If you watch a lot of those old films, they're black and white and there's no sound, and they, like, put in sound later, but... and Jim Jacobs does the commentary. I know his voice. And he was a genius too, and they- they had this incredible convergence of all these things that created Mike Tyson in like 1986, when people were like, "Holy shit."

    25. CD

      Yeah.

    26. JR

      When he would walk out there with no bathrobe and just fucking...

    27. CD

      (laughs)

    28. JR

      He was a- um, a- a cr- a perfect creation of the universe, like the universe... All the factors that would come into play that make something super special all came in, in his... I- I mean, and to be a boxing champion, it could not have had a better convergence of mind, talent, background, and then the people that were influencing him.

    29. CD

      Yeah. Y- he was wild.

    30. JR

      Yeah, he's being trained by Teddy Atlas when he's a little kid.

  5. 1:00:001:08:34

    Yeah, how are you…

    1. JR

      started playing when he was, how old? Three, maybe? Two? In the womb, arguably? I don't know. Yeah. (laughs) Yeah, and was coached by his father from the time he was a child. Played constantly. Yeah. Greatest of all time. I mean, you can get in the groove for a little bit. Yeah. And that's what keeps you going back. Uh-huh. But you're not gonna stay in the groove. You're not gonna stay in the groove. No. That, to me... My... It's maddening for me with pool. I could... 'Cause I could play pool... Like if I have a night off and I can play for like five, six hours, like around four hours in, I start really getting the groove, I start feeling it. But it's, like, inconsistent. It comes- Sure. ... and goes. Yeah. But if you play with a great player and you watch them do it, they just never get out of the groove. They're always there. Th- they very rarely miss. They very rarely miss position. Their cue ball's perfect. It's always moving exactly where they want it to go. And if it's not, they play safe. And you watch it, and you're just like, "What?" It's like, this is a feel of the movement of the balls that's only- (laughs) ... possible- Yeah. ... if you're so finely tuned to it that you're playing every day. Like, I... This, uh, guy, Fedor, he just won the, uh, world championships. He's a, a friend of mine. He's been on the podcast before.... uh, we were having a conversation on the phone about cues, 'cause he had, uh, switched. He was with this company, Cue Tech, and then he switched to this company, White Carbon. And, uh, and he- and it was months ago. And I was saying, we were talking about, you know, different approaches he uses and different equipment. He's like, "I'm still adjusting to this cue." I go, "Really?" I go, "Have you had it for, like, how long, how long now?" He's like, "Four months." He goes, "Well..." He goes, "I'm pretty much there." He goes, "But I'm about 3% or 4% off."

    2. CD

      Yeah, how are you even-

    3. JR

      3% or 4% off.

    4. CD

      Yeah.

    5. JR

      3% or 4% off. Like, this guy's a fucking robot.

    6. CD

      Yeah.

    7. JR

      Like, his, his understanding of where he should be versus where he is and h- He wants to know exactly how much pressure to apply on that cue to make that ball dance exactly the way... He's like, "Mm, it's a little off." It's a little- Like, he knows it's a little off. I did it-

    8. CD

      (laughs)

    9. JR

      ... just right, but it went there instead of there. Hmm. 3%.

    10. CD

      Yeah.

    11. JR

      What the fuck, man?

    12. CD

      You ever left the stage and just screamed, "100 fucking percent," into the green room?

    13. JR

      (laughs)

    14. CD

      "I'm off 100%"

    15. JR

      Every now and then you catch a groove and you are at 100%. And those, those moments are the weirdest. You're like, "Why can't I do this all the time? Why can't I just have so much fun with the jokes all the time?" Some of- sometimes you're having so much fun saying the material, it makes everything so much better.

    16. CD

      Yeah.

    17. JR

      And you're like, "Why don't I do this all the time?"

    18. CD

      And it just feels like every, every single thing you say-

    19. JR

      Mm-hmm.

    20. CD

      ... is gonna be awesome.

    21. JR

      And the more you do it, the more you're there. Right? So if you have a Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, like if you're doing a real week in a place-

    22. CD

      Mm-hmm.

    23. JR

      ... you know, by the time Saturday rolls around, you're a wizard.

    24. CD

      Yeah.

    25. JR

      You're a wizard.

    26. CD

      Yeah.

    27. JR

      You got those bits tied up in a fucking basement. (laughs)

    28. CD

      (laughs)

    29. JR

      You're in control of the situation.

    30. CD

      Just thinking about what you're gonna eat after the show and still killing.

Episode duration: 2:43:53

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