Joe Rogan Experience #2247 - Duncan Trussell

1. 0:00 – 15:00

   (drumbeats) Joe Rogan podcast,…

   1. NANarrator0:00

      (drumbeats) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.

   2. The Joe Rogan Experience. (drums play)

   3. JRJoe Rogan0:06

      Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. (rock music plays)

   4. DTDuncan Trussell0:12

      Oh, shit. I didn't know we had bells.

   5. JRJoe Rogan0:15

      Yeah, bro, we got bells. It's probably super annoying to people listening. (laughs)

   6. DTDuncan Trussell0:19

      We're ... That ... It's fucking Christmas.

   7. JRJoe Rogan0:21

      It is.

   8. DTDuncan Trussell0:21

      The war on Christmas must end.

   9. JRJoe Rogan0:23

      It d- ... How dare we say merry Christmas?

   10. DTDuncan Trussell0:25

       How dare you say that? It offends me.

   11. JRJoe Rogan0:29

       Did you ever see Kamala Harris do that? When she had that speech?

   12. DTDuncan Trussell0:32

       She said, "How dare you say fucking Christmas?"

   13. JRJoe Rogan0:34

       You've never seen it?

   14. DTDuncan Trussell0:35

       No.

   15. JRJoe Rogan0:35

       Oh my God. Okay, let's start with this, 'cause it's so crazy. I don't understand the context, so, like, I wish I could be charitable and say, "Well, there's probably a context where this makes sense."

   16. DTDuncan Trussell0:48

       Yeah. Satan is the lord of the Earth-

   17. JRJoe Rogan0:49

       (laughs)

   18. DTDuncan Trussell0:49

       ... is the context.

   19. NANarrator0:51

       (laughs)

   20. DTDuncan Trussell0:51

       (laughs)

   21. JRJoe Rogan0:51

       But, you know how you see something and it's only a 15-second clip, and you go like, "Okay, let me just be the nicest person possible."

   22. DTDuncan Trussell0:58

       Yes.

   23. JRJoe Rogan0:58

       Like what, what could be the reason why-

   24. DTDuncan Trussell1:00

       Yeah.

   25. JRJoe Rogan1:00

       ... you would say, "How dare we say merry Christmas?"

   26. DTDuncan Trussell1:02

       Yeah.

   27. JRJoe Rogan1:03

       Un- unless you're playing a character.

   28. DTDuncan Trussell1:04

       Right. Well-

   29. JRJoe Rogan1:05

       Unless she's on stage doing a play. She's like, "I want to read from my college play, where I was the Grinch."

   30. DTDuncan Trussell1:12

       Can you imagine saying that? Like it seems like a nightmare that you would wake up from.
2. 15:00 – 30:00

   Yeah. …

   1. JRJoe Rogan15:00

      this wild ape that had-

   2. DTDuncan Trussell15:02

      Yeah.

   3. JRJoe Rogan15:02

      ... to survive for thousands and thousands of years by killing its neighbors-

   4. DTDuncan Trussell15:06

      Yeah.

   5. JRJoe Rogan15:07

      ... and, and eating monkeys, and, and fucking running around and clubbing things to death, and eating raw meat-

   6. DTDuncan Trussell15:13

      Yeah.

   7. JRJoe Rogan15:14

      ... until it figured out how to harness fire. And then it had to deal with neighboring tribes coming in with hordes of people with swords and spears, and-

   8. DTDuncan Trussell15:22

      Yeah.

   9. JRJoe Rogan15:22

      ... you had to run for the hills. They killed your kids in front of you. They fucked your wife in front of you.

   10. DTDuncan Trussell15:27

       Yep.

   11. JRJoe Rogan15:28

       They cut your dick off and stuffed it in your mouth. And this was thousands and thousands of years-

   12. DTDuncan Trussell15:35

       Yeah. Yeah, dude.

   13. JRJoe Rogan15:36

       This thing we're doing right now is so recent.

   14. DTDuncan Trussell15:39

       Yeah.

   15. JRJoe Rogan15:39

       This thing where you can meet strangers, you don't have to worry about killing them-

   16. DTDuncan Trussell15:43

       Yeah, that's-

   17. JRJoe Rogan15:44

       ... super recent.

   18. DTDuncan Trussell15:46

       Dogs aren't there yet.

   19. JRJoe Rogan15:47

       No.

   20. DTDuncan Trussell15:47

       That's why dogs freak out when someone comes to your door.

   21. JRJoe Rogan15:49

       Oh, yeah.

   22. DTDuncan Trussell15:49

       They're not there yet.

   23. JRJoe Rogan15:50

       Right.

   24. DTDuncan Trussell15:50

       They still remember the old days.

   25. JRJoe Rogan15:52

       Mm-hmm.

   26. DTDuncan Trussell15:52

       And the, the-

   27. JRJoe Rogan15:53

       That's a great point.

   28. DTDuncan Trussell15:54

       They, they, they're still like... Dude, usually if someone's coming up-

   29. JRJoe Rogan15:57

       Yeah.

   30. DTDuncan Trussell15:57

       ... we have to kill it. Like, and they're reminding you of that.
3. 30:00 – 45:00

   Yeah, right. …

   1. JRJoe Rogan30:00

      And by the way, not that hard. You know what's way harder than that? Building a planet.

   2. DTDuncan Trussell30:05

      Yeah, right.

   3. JRJoe Rogan30:06

      Right? There's plenty of planets.

   4. DTDuncan Trussell30:07

      Yeah.

   5. JRJoe Rogan30:08

      That is not that hard. That is essentially what happens all the time.

   6. DTDuncan Trussell30:11

      Yeah.

   7. JRJoe Rogan30:11

      In like the insect kingdom, where they get infested by another-

   8. DTDuncan Trussell30:15

      There you go.

   9. JRJoe Rogan30:15

      ... parasite that controls their brain.

   10. DTDuncan Trussell30:16

       There you go. Dude, I, I went down a deep rabbit hole with this shit because, you know, I was like looking right after Trump won, which by the way, can... I wanna remind you... I'm sorry, I don't wanna pat myself on the back, but when we were hunting for Bigfoot-

   11. JRJoe Rogan30:29

       (laughs)

   12. DTDuncan Trussell30:30

       ... do you remember I said to you, "One day you're gonna get a president elected"?

   13. JRJoe Rogan30:34

       Did you say that?

   14. DTDuncan Trussell30:35

       No. Uh... (laughs)

   15. JRJoe Rogan30:37

       (laughs) Back then, that would have been the least likely scenario. I'm in the woods with the Fear Factor guy-And we're legitimately looking for Bigfoot.

   16. DTDuncan Trussell30:49

       Legitimately?

   17. JRJoe Rogan30:49

       Legitimately, with Bigfoot experts.

   18. DTDuncan Trussell30:51

       Dude, that was one of my favorite camping trips I've ever had in my life.

   19. JRJoe Rogan30:53

       It was fun, dude.

   20. DTDuncan Trussell30:54

       I would love to do that again-

   21. JRJoe Rogan30:56

       We had so much fun.

   22. DTDuncan Trussell30:56

       ... hunting for Bigfoot. It's like, 'cause hunting for animals, which I know you love, I have nothing against it, but you still gotta kill an animal. Hunting for Bigfoot, you just like, look for a twig out of place and you get to imagine he's nearby. And that, that, it's really fun. Squatching is fun.

   23. JRJoe Rogan31:12

       Somebody asked me if, uh, I saw Bigfoot, would I kill it? 'Cause if I could kill it, then I could show people that it's real.

   24. DTDuncan Trussell31:20

       Hmm. Interesting. Interesting. Would you?

   25. JRJoe Rogan31:23

       No.

   26. DTDuncan Trussell31:24

       All right.

   27. JRJoe Rogan31:24

       Why would I kill Bigfoot?

   28. DTDuncan Trussell31:26

       Well-

   29. JRJoe Rogan31:26

       But this, like, why would you do that? Like it doesn't make any sense. Just to prove that it's real? Well, guess what? Guess we can't prove it. There's no other way. It's not like I tell you where it happened-

   30. DTDuncan Trussell31:35

       Right.
4. 45:00 – 1:00:00

   I think in the…

   1. DTDuncan Trussell45:00

   2. JRJoe Rogan45:00

      I think in the world, dude.

   3. DTDuncan Trussell45:01

      In the world.

   4. JRJoe Rogan45:01

      I think he's the to- number one in the world, which is fucking insane.

   5. DTDuncan Trussell45:05

      Uh, you, and, and dude, and I, I know you, and, and I, I'm, I'm not trying to high road you here, but unless you've played Diablo IV, you can't understand what that means.

   6. JRJoe Rogan45:16

      I absolutely accept that. I do not understand what that means.

   7. DTDuncan Trussell45:19

      It, it is insane. Like, it i- like, when I was addicted to that fucking game, like, I just wasn't sleeping, 'cause you know I had to do dad duty in the day, Diablo at night, and I was, I sucked. So, when you realize this guy, shooting rockets into space, making e-vehicles, starting a new fucking department of the government-

   8. JRJoe Rogan45:41

      (laughs)

   9. DTDuncan Trussell45:42

      ... is also the top...

   10. JRJoe Rogan45:44

       (laughs)

   11. DTDuncan Trussell45:45

       It's the w-

   12. JRJoe Rogan45:46

       It's so crazy.

   13. DTDuncan Trussell45:47

       It's the one time I actually let myself think, maybe he actually is an alien, because there is no, there's just no way, unless he's paying people to do it for him, which obviously he's not. I- that i- that is insane, man.

   14. JRJoe Rogan46:01

       Yeah.

   15. DTDuncan Trussell46:01

       That is insane. So, dude, when you, when you consider... I don't even know where I was going with that. I got lost in Diablo IV just thinking about it.

   16. JRJoe Rogan46:09

       Well, we were just talking about how he's the number, he's the number one player, that Elon, that how, how preposterous it is.

   17. DTDuncan Trussell46:15

       It's i- no, it's s-

   18. JRJoe Rogan46:16

       That I don't know, I go, I don't play Diablo IV, so I really don't know what that means, but I believe it's huge.

   19. DTDuncan Trussell46:22

       It's-

   20. JRJoe Rogan46:22

       You know what I'm saying? Like, I don't, it's like-

   21. DTDuncan Trussell46:24

       It's crazy. It's crazy, 'cause you know Diablo IV, it's all about your build. It's all about, like, i- it, eye-hand coordination is obviously a big part of it, but then-

   22. JRJoe Rogan46:34

       (laughs)

   23. DTDuncan Trussell46:35

       ... i- i- it's just, i- and then you see the chopsticks catch the fucking rocket. And it's like-

   24. JRJoe Rogan46:40

       Yeah. Oh, that's side job.

   25. DTDuncan Trussell46:43

       I-

   26. JRJoe Rogan46:43

       Side job, he's had more r- space innovation in, in the last five years than NASA has since the Apollo missions. (laughs)

   27. DTDuncan Trussell46:51

       It's amazing.

   28. JRJoe Rogan46:51

       I mean, I'm just saying that. I don't know if it's a true number. But he gets rockets to land, and rockets get caught with robot arms. Like, what?

   29. DTDuncan Trussell47:01

       And that, to me, it's like, my God, you know, you get those feelings like, "Okay, I'm on the right timeline." 'Cause if the guy who's going to make us a galactic civilization is also a master Diablo player-

   30. JRJoe Rogan47:11

       The number one.
5. 1:00:00 – 1:15:00

   The, the, the, the…

   1. JRJoe Rogan1:00:00

      Part of the fun. Yeah.

   2. DTDuncan Trussell1:00:01

      The, the, the, the risk.

   3. JRJoe Rogan1:00:02

      Yeah. Well, they're coked out of their fucking minds, dude. They don't know what they're doing.

   4. DTDuncan Trussell1:00:06

      (sighs)

   5. JRJoe Rogan1:00:07

      This is the '80s in Miami.

   6. DTDuncan Trussell1:00:09

      Holy shit, dude.

   7. JRJoe Rogan1:00:11

      Yeah, and there was more (laughs) more banks per capita in Miami at the time ... I don't know if it's still the case, but more banks in Miami per capita than anywhere else in the country. 'Cause it was all just << Moving in that yayo, son. >>

   8. DTDuncan Trussell1:00:26

      Yeah.

   9. JRJoe Rogan1:00:26

      << Moving in that yayo. >>

   10. DTDuncan Trussell1:00:28

       Yeah.

   11. JRJoe Rogan1:00:28

       It was a cocaine city.

   12. DTDuncan Trussell1:00:31

       That was where it was probably somewhat common to find, like, a bag of coke on the beach, right?

   13. JRJoe Rogan1:00:36

       Probably every day. (laughs)

   14. DTDuncan Trussell1:00:38

       That was where you s- You have to get your kid-

   15. JRJoe Rogan1:00:39

       Yeah.

   16. DTDuncan Trussell1:00:40

       Your kid would bring you a bag of coke.

   17. JRJoe Rogan1:00:42

       (laughs) They're like seashells. (laughs)

   18. DTDuncan Trussell1:00:44

       (laughs)

   19. JRJoe Rogan1:00:46

       You've seen Cocaine Cowboys, right?

   20. DTDuncan Trussell1:00:47

       Yes.

   21. JRJoe Rogan1:00:48

       Oh my God, it's so ... And both I and II, both are equally good.

   22. DTDuncan Trussell1:00:51

       Dude, I've heard-

   23. JRJoe Rogan1:00:52

       But that story is so insane.

   24. DTDuncan Trussell1:00:54

       I mean, again, like, the ... I would never ... I, I, I'm too much of a pussy to live that kinda lifestyle, but when you think about the possibility that once we do get interfaced in some way or another with these new computers that are just right around the corner, uh, we will be able to simulate e- experiences like that.

   25. JRJoe Rogan1:01:16

       Yes.

   26. DTDuncan Trussell1:01:17

       I will definitely ... I would be into simulating the experience. And then, when you consider, yeah, but y- you're gonna simulate the experience, you know it's a simulation-At some point you're gonna be like, "You know what? Let's just turn that off where I know it's a simulation." You know what I mean? Th- uh, we would all be doing that shit.

   27. JRJoe Rogan1:01:35

       Right.

   28. DTDuncan Trussell1:01:35

       Like, and, and I don't just mean like, uh, literally like, I mean, at some point you've done 20,000 lifetimes. You've experienced what it's like to be George Washington, Genghis Khan. You've experienced what it's like to be Joan of Arc. You've experienced being one of Jesus' disciples.

   29. JRJoe Rogan1:01:51

       Imagine if that's one person and that's your backstory.

   30. DTDuncan Trussell1:01:54

       That you've done all of those things.
6. 1:15:00 – 1:17:59

   Right. …

   1. DTDuncan Trussell1:15:00

      hard to get that thing to, to function just in, like, brief moments. You only need him to function for, like, 10 minutes at a press conference, 20 minutes here, get him off the plane, get him in the fucking building. If we can pull that off, we'll have power for a little bit longer. A little bit longer. Dude, when you consider that we apparently live in a democracy, you elect this dude who makes decisions because in some way, shape, or form, he aligns with what you want the country to be, and the people fucking puppeteering that, that poor old man are just like, "No, actually, fuck you. He's not gonna make any fucking decisions 'cause he's incapacitated. He's gone, gone with the fucking wind, and now we're in control, and you didn't vote for us." That is terrifying. That is so... That's i- in a way, that's worse than a coup, because at least with a coup, you see the military, they come in, the tanks are in front of the White House, some dude is suddenly the leader-

   2. JRJoe Rogan1:15:58

      Right.

   3. DTDuncan Trussell1:15:59

      ... and you know it's not the guy you voted for.

   4. JRJoe Rogan1:16:01

      Well, it was certainly, by definition, it was a coup against Biden.

   5. DTDuncan Trussell1:16:06

      Oh, with Kamala?

   6. JRJoe Rogan1:16:07

      Yeah.

   7. DTDuncan Trussell1:16:07

      Oh, yeah. Yeah.

   8. JRJoe Rogan1:16:08

      I mean, by... Isn't that by definition? Does a coup have to be military?

   9. DTDuncan Trussell1:16:13

      Oh, no, no, no. That was-

   10. JRJoe Rogan1:16:14

       What's the definition of a coup?

   11. DTDuncan Trussell1:16:15

       I think a coup is just when you f-

   12. JRJoe Rogan1:16:17

       Is it just like a... Some sort of a conspiracy to remove-

   13. DTDuncan Trussell1:16:21

       Overthrow the leader and ins- install a new leader.

   14. JRJoe Rogan1:16:24

       ... remove... Yeah. That's it, right?

   15. DTDuncan Trussell1:16:25

       That's it. Yeah.

   16. JRJoe Rogan1:16:25

       It doesn't have to be violent, right?

   17. DTDuncan Trussell1:16:26

       That, that's right. And, and what a brilliant coup.

   18. JRJoe Rogan1:16:28

       I love the, the bell.

   19. NANarrator1:16:29

       It does.

   20. JRJoe Rogan1:16:30

       It does have to be violent?

   21. NANarrator1:16:30

       It's in the definition. A sudden, violent, unlawful seizure of power.

   22. DTDuncan Trussell1:16:33

       I guess we have to redefine that.

   23. JRJoe Rogan1:16:35

       Yeah.

   24. DTDuncan Trussell1:16:36

       B- because, again-

   25. JRJoe Rogan1:16:37

       That's interesting. Is there any other... Coup d'etat?

   26. NANarrator1:16:40

       That's what it comes from.

   27. DTDuncan Trussell1:16:40

       Maybe.

   28. JRJoe Rogan1:16:41

       Right. I know it comes from that, but, um...

   29. DTDuncan Trussell1:16:43

       Is there a difference between a coup and a coup d'etat? What's a coup?

   30. JRJoe Rogan1:16:47

       No, I think it is coup d'etat. That's the actual definition. Everybody-

Episode duration: 2:35:02