EVERY SPOKEN WORD
150 min read · 30,003 words- 0:00 – 0:55
Cigars, marriage jokes, and a surprise evacuation alert in LA
- NANarrator
(drumming music plays) Joe Rogan podcast. Check it out.
The Joe Rogan Experience.
- BCBryan Callen
Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night. All day. (rock music plays) Do you have good... towards it. My wife, uh, I smoked one of these and I didn't brush my teeth. I woke up the next morning and my wife said, "Your breath is four dimensional." (laughs)
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs) You didn't brush your teeth before you went to bed and you smoked a cigar?
- BCBryan Callen
No. Of course I didn't brush my teeth before I went to bed.
- JRJoe Rogan
Ugh.
- BCBryan Callen
Give a fuck?
- JRJoe Rogan
Ugh.
- BCBryan Callen
You know what I mean? You're married, you're married. She was like-
- JRJoe Rogan
Ugh.
- BCBryan Callen
... "I love you so much. Your breath is four dimensional."
- JRJoe Rogan
Ooh.
- BCBryan Callen
You know these fires... I, uh, w- I have two small children now. 'Cause what I wanna do is, what you wanna do is you wanna get divorced and then you wanna have, get married again to a woman who's 23 years younger and then have two more kids, 'cause that's good. And, uh, and then I-
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs) Definitely takes a lot of financial stress off your back.
- BCBryan Callen
Oh, dude. There's no financial stress at all. It's great.
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs)
- BCBryan Callen
You know what? If I hustled til I'm 80, I'll be fine. Anyway, um...
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs)
- 0:55 – 4:07
LA wildfire response, fire hydrants, and government competence
- BCBryan Callen
Oof. (laughs) It's gonna be really awkward when I call you at 75, "I, I just need help this month." But anyway, so I, uh, fucking, um, I, I look at her and I go, um... She's like a girl from Jersey, like Irish-Italian chick, no nonsense, you know. Been working since she was 16. And I go, um, "You know, they, we had an evacuation order that they sent out by accident to people even down where I'm at."
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, what was that?
- BCBryan Callen
It was some guy who fucked up, because I don't know if you know, this is gonna s- be, this is gonna be shocking. Grab the table.
- JRJoe Rogan
Wait a minute.
- BCBryan Callen
LA's not run very well. (laughs)
- JRJoe Rogan
Hold on!
- BCBryan Callen
I know. Hold on.
- JRJoe Rogan
What the fuck you saying?
- BCBryan Callen
Well, because, see, here's the thing. We have to worry about-
- JRJoe Rogan
Wait a minute.
- BCBryan Callen
I know. It's-
- JRJoe Rogan
Isn't the chief of fire department a lesbian?
- BCBryan Callen
Now, hold on. Let's not turn this into-
- JRJoe Rogan
LA's run amazing.
- BCBryan Callen
Listen, here's the bottom line.
- JRJoe Rogan
It's run amazingly.
- BCBryan Callen
It's not about infrastructure. Infrastructure's gotta take-
- JRJoe Rogan
I won't sit here while you disparage the great people-
- BCBryan Callen
Sir-
- JRJoe Rogan
... that are running Los Angeles.
- BCBryan Callen
Sir, infrastructure's gotta take a backseat to climate change and social justice and homeless abatement, which hasn't worked.
- JRJoe Rogan
See the lady who's responsible for filling the fire hydrants gets paid $750,000 a year?
- BCBryan Callen
Hey, your tax dollar's going to good work there, everybody.
- JRJoe Rogan
That's a lot of money.
- BCBryan Callen
You think?
- JRJoe Rogan
That's sitcom money.
- BCBryan Callen
You think? I said my-
- JRJoe Rogan
That's like, "I'm the star of a sitcom."
- BCBryan Callen
Oh, dude. It's-
- JRJoe Rogan
Not star, but like you're the third person on the sitcom.
- 4:07 – 10:14
Diversity messaging vs. emergency performance: what matters in a rescue
- JRJoe Rogan
And that's a giant wake-up call, when you realize, like, no, this, these fucking people, this is not the way to do it. Did you see that lady, the, the fire lady, uh, who's a part of this whole diversity thing? They said, uh, "You're a woman firefighter. Can you w- if, can you carry my husband out of a burning building?" She was like, "Well, if your husband's in a burning building, he already made a mistake."
- BCBryan Callen
(laughs) Is that what she said?
- JRJoe Rogan
She's a big old sassy-
- BCBryan Callen
My-
- JRJoe Rogan
... fat Black lady.
- BCBryan Callen
... yeah. My favorite was that, one of the women said, "You want people to rep- to look like you." And-
- JRJoe Rogan
Same lady.
- BCBryan Callen
And I'm like, "Hey, listen."
- JRJoe Rogan
Same lady.
- BCBryan Callen
"Hey, lady. When, when my house is on fire and I'm trying to get my kids out, I'm not gonna be like, 'Hey, I got, I... Can I get some people that look like me? Because this, this doesn't make me feel safe.'"
- JRJoe Rogan
I wanna be able to look like Brian Shaw.
- BCBryan Callen
So do I.
- JRJoe Rogan
I wanna be able to come through fucking-
- BCBryan Callen
So do I.
- JRJoe Rogan
... walls looking like juggernaut.
- BCBryan Callen
They can be white as the driven snow.
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs) I wanna be able to look like-
- BCBryan Callen
Okay, they, if they look, if they look like a White Walker and they can get me out of that fucking fire, I'm in. I want Brian Shaw.
- JRJoe Rogan
I wanna be able to be a giant dude who can carry people.
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah, with a mustache that goes like this.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- BCBryan Callen
Right?
- JRJoe Rogan
Fucking handlebars. Yeah.
- BCBryan Callen
I love firemen.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- BCBryan Callen
I'm such a, I'm so gay that when I saw... They came by, I saw some firemen, and I didn't know what to do. I was, I wanted to say something like, "Go get them, guys," or something like that, and I, and I literally went like this.
- JRJoe Rogan
Ugh.
- BCBryan Callen
I went, I saluted them. I went...
- JRJoe Rogan
That's good. Something.
- BCBryan Callen
It was a little embarrassing.
- 10:14 – 12:55
Living through evacuations: fire as a ‘storm’ and terrifying firsthand stories
- JRJoe Rogan
No, you should have been out... You gotta get out of there. You gotta accept it. I've been evacuated three times.
- BCBryan Callen
Have you really?
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, when I lived in Belcaire.
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah, I remember that. Yeah, I remember that.
- JRJoe Rogan
I got evacuated three times. You know, it, it burnt two houses in front in 2018. Two houses in front of my, uh, old house were burnt to the ground.
- BCBryan Callen
Well, that, that video I showed you of my friend's house-
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm.
- BCBryan Callen
... that just disappeared, and then do you remember I sent you that video-
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm.
- BCBryan Callen
... of him driving down the PCH? Those guys are coming to my house, because our hou- where I'm at is the only place that's, you know-
- JRJoe Rogan
For them to help.
- BCBryan Callen
... where the air is breathable and all that.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah. For now.
- BCBryan Callen
Well, we have a barrier between, um, the 405 and also the airport, so it's really... We're pretty safe, even here.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, pretty safe.
- BCBryan Callen
Hm.
- JRJoe Rogan
The thing about... I mean, this is from someone who's been through it a few times. You don't understand. You think it's just a fire. It's not. It's a storm.
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
So I saw fire tornadoes.
- BCBryan Callen
You did?
- JRJoe Rogan
Until you've seen a... Yeah, I saw fire tornadoes. When we were filming-
- BCBryan Callen
It's terrifying.
- JRJoe Rogan
We were filming on Fear Factor, and ironically, this was the same time where this fireman was explaining to me what's gonna happen in LA. We were filming Fear Factor, and when we were driving back, the entire ri-... I go-... I watched a guy die.
- BCBryan Callen
What?
- JRJoe Rogan
I watched a guy run across the highway and get hit by a car.
- BCBryan Callen
What the fuck?
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah. I didn't see him get hit by a car, but I saw him.
- BCBryan Callen
Jesus Christ.
- JRJoe Rogan
Uh, he was... And my, um, producer, the producer of the show apparently saw more. He saw, like, graphic... You know. People were panicking. Um, the, there was ash falling from the sky like it was snowing. It was crazy. And everyone's driving, and no one... Everyone's got this, like, somber, like, 50-mile-an-hour driving. The entire right side of the highway for an hour. Like-
- BCBryan Callen
What?
- 12:55 – 18:04
Palisades devastation, rebuilding questions, looting—and rumor correction
- BCBryan Callen
The h- you know, I gotta tell you, the crazy thing about the Pacific Palisades was that eight years ago, probably, eight, maybe almost nine years ago, I looked at houses there with my, my ex-wife, and we came so close to buying a house 'cause it was s- it's such a beautiful place. We didn't buy it 'cause it was a little too expensive, to be honest with you, it was like, it was like, you know, just a little out of our price, you know, point. But, uh, even like for a smaller house, it was expensive, right? But it's beautiful neighborhood.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, it's a pricey area, but it's gorgeous.
- BCBryan Callen
The last thing, the last thing... The last thing you would ever think, the last thing is, um, that that house would burn down or there was a fire hazard, especially down like where Gelson's was or the whole town. That, dude, when I'm saying the town is gone, do you know the only structure that's standing is that guy Caruso, that mayor, the guy who ran for mayor, narrowly lost to Karen Bass? He built that mall out of fire retardant material and that's the only structures that pretty much downtown that are, that in, in the town of Cali- um, Pacific Palisades. Frank Grillo, um, our buddy-
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm.
- BCBryan Callen
... his old house burned right to the ground. Just done. Just gone.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, Segura's house burned to the ground.
- BCBryan Callen
Everybody's. That didn't Mel Gibson's?
- JRJoe Rogan
The one he sold. Yeah, Mel Gibson's burned to the ground too.
- BCBryan Callen
Look at that, look at that, dude. Look at that.
- JRJoe Rogan
It's insane.
- BCBryan Callen
Nobody in a million years... I'm telling you, nope-
- JRJoe Rogan
That's so crazy.
- BCBryan Callen
When you bought a house there, nobody said anything about fire. No one.
- JRJoe Rogan
That's so... And by the way, fire insurance in LA... Why, look at that one house, perfect. Isn't that crazy?
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah, that's crazy.
- JRJoe Rogan
What's that made out of?
- BCBryan Callen
I don't know.
- JRJoe Rogan
The fucking-
- BCBryan Callen
I, I think just the wind blew a different direction or something.
- JRJoe Rogan
I don't know, man.
- BCBryan Callen
It's crazy.
- JRJoe Rogan
I think it's gotta be what the house is made of, 'cause that wind's blowing everywhere.
- BCBryan Callen
No, I, I don't think any house withstands that kind of fire. I think that's fucked up.
- JRJoe Rogan
Are you sure?
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
How do you know? Are you a builder?
- BCBryan Callen
I am (laughs) .
- JRJoe Rogan
You're not a builder.
- BCBryan Callen
That's Bryan Callen just, "Nah, nah, I don't believe anything can burn in California."
- JRJoe Rogan
I- can't you make a house out of all concrete?
- 18:04 – 19:55
Conspiracy culture and scapegoating: ‘blaming the Jews’ and societal collapse markers
- JRJoe Rogan
If you don't believe in direct energy weapons.
- BCBryan Callen
... yes, I forgot about those-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- BCBryan Callen
... from space.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- BCBryan Callen
I wonder who's controlling those-
- JRJoe Rogan
No, no, they're in the-
- BCBryan Callen
The Rothschilds.
- JRJoe Rogan
... Antarctica. Antarctica.
- BCBryan Callen
Mm-hmm.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, the Rothschilds.
- BCBryan Callen
Yes. (laughs) The-
- JRJoe Rogan
It's a cabal of Jews.
- BCBryan Callen
Yes, the ins- visible circle of Jews. That's what... Every conspiracy theory always goes right back to that, "I'm just saying."
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- BCBryan Callen
And they go, "All right."
- JRJoe Rogan
But, you know, the, the Mossad and the IDF and, like, the, the influence on politics is pretty well established. Like, there's both things.
- NANarrator
Mm-hmm.
- JRJoe Rogan
It's like, no, it's not the... The Jews aren't the problem in the whole world, no, and when everything goes sideways, people always do start blaming the Jews.
- BCBryan Callen
Always.
- JRJoe Rogan
Did we ever figure out who said that to us? Was it Jordan?
- NANarrator
What?
- JRJoe Rogan
Was it Jordan who started talking or was it Gad Saad, who started talking about it's one of the marks of a collapsing society when they start blaming everything on the Jews?
- BCBryan Callen
They, they blamed the Black Plague on them. They're like, "You guys cover your wells." My, my thing about that is whenever people go bad on the Jews, I'm always like, "Yeah? Do you like Hollywood? They invented that."
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, but-
- BCBryan Callen
"And improv and monotheism."
- JRJoe Rogan
Maybe not. Maybe that's not good. But then also-
- BCBryan Callen
And stainless steel.
- JRJoe Rogan
Do they invent stainless steel?
- BCBryan Callen
And virtual reality. Yes, and virtual reality.
- 19:55 – 22:33
Epstein theories: payoffs, blackmail speculation, and Eric Weinstein’s ‘construct’ claim
- BCBryan Callen
What... Have we ever, uh, have... Has there a- been any... What is the, with the list? My, my... Here's my theory on the Jeffrey Epstein thing. What, just see what you think.
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh, I would love to hear this.
- BCBryan Callen
Okay.
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs)
- BCBryan Callen
I think that, I think that the people are so powerful that I, that I know, I know in certain cases, the lawyers go to the lawyers of these powerful people. And they go, "How you doing? Now, we got some evidence that your client, who's a family man and everything else, was banging girls on Jeffrey's island."
- JRJoe Rogan
Getting pissed on.
- BCBryan Callen
Yep. Yeah, whatever it is, bro.
- JRJoe Rogan
Getting his nuts put in a cinch.
- BCBryan Callen
Sure. We got, we got-
- JRJoe Rogan
Little kids are shitting in his mouth.
- BCBryan Callen
(laughs) Sure.
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs)
- BCBryan Callen
"Hey, dude. Hey, hold on. What kind of podcast is this?"
- JRJoe Rogan
Look, they're doing drugs.
- BCBryan Callen
Why did everyone bring a beer?
- JRJoe Rogan
They're doing drugs, they're taking wild chances.
- BCBryan Callen
As I put this shit cigar in my mouth. I don't know.
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs) These are good cigars, man.
- BCBryan Callen
Mm-hmm. Delicious. Um-
- JRJoe Rogan
Shout out to Foundation Cigars.
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah, it's great. Um, but, but I think what happened was there was a lot of money and every one of those fucking people got paid off. I think it just went away 'cause there's, there's money. It, they, they came to these really rich people and they were like, "W- what, what's your, what's your privacy worth? What's your reputation worth? How about $10 million? How about 20?"
- JRJoe Rogan
Well, this is the, the whole suspicion as to why the guy who was the CEO of Victoria's Secrets gave Jeffrey Epstein a fucking $60 million mansion in Manhattan.
- BCBryan Callen
And controlled his whole estate.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, and then there was the other guy who was some big CEO who gave him $150 million and had to resign.
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
A bunch of these guys resigned. Um, money got passed around, and unbelievably, the client list has not been released.
- BCBryan Callen
I know.
- JRJoe Rogan
I mean, it's been years.
- BCBryan Callen
And he, he was very good at laundering money, I guess, and he was also-
- JRJoe Rogan
Was he? Even though I don't know what he really did. You know, the, the person do I trust about those things is, uh, Eric Weinstein.
- 22:33 – 30:35
Meditation vs. psychedelics: Buddhism, the ‘observer’ exercise, and monk self-immolation
- BCBryan Callen
Ever tell you his, his theory on, uh, on what he thinks this whole thing is? This whole, you know, ah, it's a simulation or whatever.
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm.
- BCBryan Callen
You're a, he's... 'Cause, you know... So, so Newton, there's Newtonian physics, right, which is this matter here, and then there's quantum physics, study of the electron that Einstein was a pioneer of and blah, blah, blah. So, Einstein was working on what's called the theory of everything, which was the bridge. How do you, how do you... 'Cause a lot of times the rules in this ether, in Newtonian, in the world that we live in are different wh- when it comes to gravity and light than they are on a quantum level. So, what is the bridge? How do we bring them together? Well, how do we reconcile both realities?
- JRJoe Rogan
Right.
- BCBryan Callen
So that's the theory of everything. So Eric is obsessed with that and kinda works from that.
- JRJoe Rogan
Well, he made his own theory of everything.
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah, so his idea is that maybe the singularity is already here and maybe we're already machines and we are... So, so watch this. So we're already machines replicating better machines, better versions of ourselves. And it's kind of an interesting 'cause, 'cause it kinda fold dovetails with Buddhism, right? So watch this. I'm gonna do an experiment on you that, that a Buddhist ******* will ask somebody.
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh, should I get prepared?
- BCBryan Callen
Get, get, get in the lotus-
- JRJoe Rogan
(inhales)
- BCBryan Callen
Get in the lotus position. There it is.
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh.
- BCBryan Callen
Ommmm.
- JRJoe Rogan
(exhales)
- BCBryan Callen
There it is. Dude, good breathing.
- JRJoe Rogan
I'm ready. (laughs)
- BCBryan Callen
Good breathing. Too much-
- JRJoe Rogan
I'm watching this guy-
- BCBryan Callen
Too much yang energy.
- JRJoe Rogan
... doing, uh-
- BCBryan Callen
Bring your yin in.
- JRJoe Rogan
... DMT breathing today on Instagram. He was explaining how to spike your DMT and communicate with entities.
- BCBryan Callen
Oh, that's good.
- JRJoe Rogan
And he was saying how you, you, you, you, you compress your, your balls and your asshole and all your sex organs. And then through your abdominals and you exhale all your breath. (exhales)
- BCBryan Callen
Goo- And you gotta-
- JRJoe Rogan
And then you breathe like this. (sighs)
- BCBryan Callen
And then you come?
- JRJoe Rogan
And you get that DMT flow.
- BCBryan Callen
Oh, is that what you get?
- JRJoe Rogan
I don't know.
- 30:35 – 42:16
Ego, maturity, and learning to argue better (and less) over time
- JRJoe Rogan
... yeah, I think all those things are tools to try to break out of the ego.
- BCBryan Callen
Mm-hmm.
- JRJoe Rogan
Right? It's all the- the problem that most people have is they think about themselves all the time, and the worst version of it is extreme narcissism, you know, and sociopathy. And then the- the best people are the people that think about others more than they think about themselves.
- BCBryan Callen
Mm-hmm.
- JRJoe Rogan
Those are the people that we admire the most.
- BCBryan Callen
Mm-hmm.
- JRJoe Rogan
The people that, like, genuinely think about other people-
- BCBryan Callen
That's right.
- JRJoe Rogan
... a lot.
- BCBryan Callen
That's right.
- JRJoe Rogan
I think one thing that I really genuinely do try to do is I try to not think about myself.
- BCBryan Callen
Yep.
- JRJoe Rogan
I think about things that I must do. (clears throat) Uh, I do think about things that I don't like that I did. Like, "I don't like how I handled that conversation. Maybe I c- maybe I was coming in, like, a little hot. Maybe I was coming in at a five, and I should've been at a two, and maybe- maybe the reason why it became a d- a- like, a contentious argument was my fault."
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
You know? And I've re-
- BCBryan Callen
Very good.
- JRJoe Rogan
I'm so much better at that than when I w- I was when I was younger-
- BCBryan Callen
Mm-hmm.
- JRJoe Rogan
... at, like, I can have a conversation with someone that I vehemently disagree with and keep it very civil.
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah, when we were younger, both you and I-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah. Yeah.
- BCBryan Callen
... we'd start shouting our opinions.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's-
- BCBryan Callen
It was about winning. It wasn't even about-
- JRJoe Rogan
Also, we were all retarded.
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
And we were young and stupid, and we had bad role models. (laughs)
- BCBryan Callen
(laughs) Dude. Dude.
- JRJoe Rogan
So we were- like there was a lot of things going on there.
- BCBryan Callen
The worst.
- 42:16 – 45:52
Hollywood psychology: auditions, attention-seeking, and Rogan’s accidental TV path
- JRJoe Rogan
So, think about the a- audition process. And I've al- I've, I've always talked about this, that this is a part of the whole problem with the entire psychology of Los Angeles. 'Cause a giant percentage of people at least had some way in the back of their head, some, some sort of an aspiration to try to get famous.
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
So, you move there. You have already a v- exorbitant need for attention because there's some hole in your past-
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
... in your... that you're trying to fill up with, "I wanna be a star."
- BCBryan Callen
Yes.
- JRJoe Rogan
"And I wanna be so..." And then you're going somewhere... So, this need for acceptance, and then you're going somewhere where people judge you-... and most of the time, judge you poorly.
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
Most of the time, they don't like you.
- BCBryan Callen
Mm-hmm.
- JRJoe Rogan
So most things you audition for, you don't get.
- BCBryan Callen
Right.
- JRJoe Rogan
And if you get one, "Oh, my God. Now I'm in." And so now, these manipulative people that are in charge of casting you, they can essentially mold your personality based on what they want. If they want a left-wing personality, if they want you to be pro-Kamala and, "We need a Black woman president," you, they want you to say all the... "I, I took my eighth booster this morning. Like, I believe in science. You know? Love is love."
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah. Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
Like, they'll turn you into that fucking thing.
- BCBryan Callen
Yes. Yes.
- JRJoe Rogan
They'll turn you into that thing because the, the entire place is about the golden ticket. Everybody wants the golden ticket. I was so lucky because I never had any aspirations about acting. I had zero.
- BCBryan Callen
I remember. I remember you called me. You remember you called me and said-
- JRJoe Rogan
But I mean, let me just-
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
... let me tell you the whole story behind it. When MTV, when I did the Half-Hour Comedy Hour and then I got a development deal to do a sitcom, I had never taken a single acting class. And all of a sudden, I have this development deal. And I'm over there. And when the show that I was on got canceled, I was ready to go back to New York to be a comic again. I was like, "Fuck this place." But I bought a f- I had a lease. I had a lease on an apartment for a year. I'm like, "Fuck."
- BCBryan Callen
Right.
- JRJoe Rogan
So I have, I was stuck in this... I couldn't afford to not be in this 'cause now I wasn't getting $20,000 a week anymore.
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
Like, whatever the fuck I was doing.
- BCBryan Callen
I remember.
- JRJoe Rogan
I was like, "Holy shit." And I was ready to leave. And so then, I get another development deal and then I auditioned for the second show I ever do. I only had two auditions, ever, Hardball and News Radio. And I'm on two TV shows. I'm like, "This is crazy."
- BCBryan Callen
Yup.
- JRJoe Rogan
And so I never went through that whole thing. I never went through that whole, "This could change my life." My life was already changed.
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah.
- 45:52 – 47:39
Getting better with age: Dom Irrera stories and why comedy can sharpen over time
- BCBryan Callen
... now, I told you, like, the cool thing about being 57, I'm enjoying standup more now than I ever have.
- JRJoe Rogan
Well, you're smarter now.
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
And Dom Irrera said this to me years ago, he's like, "Joe," you know, he was like in his 60s at the time. He's like, "Joe, I've never been sharper than ever." You just keep-
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
... doing it and you keep getting better. We're so lucky we're comics."
- BCBryan Callen
Fuck.
- JRJoe Rogan
"We're so lucky."
- BCBryan Callen
So lucky.
- JRJoe Rogan
And he was. He was better in his 60s than he was in his-
- BCBryan Callen
Hilarious.
- JRJoe Rogan
He was always great. He's always-
- BCBryan Callen
In his 60s, hilarious.
- JRJoe Rogan
I paid to see Dom Irrera before I ever did standup comedy.
- BCBryan Callen
Dom is the best damn comedian. So did I, so did I.
- JRJoe Rogan
Did you?
- BCBryan Callen
First f-f-f-f... I was in college and, um, I was at The Improv in New York and my father took me to, we sat there and watched Dom Irrera. I remember that's why when, when, when I'd come offstage at The Laugh Factory and I was still a little in awe of Dom. And Dom goes, "Bry, come over here." And I was like, "Oh, maybe he's gonna give me some pointers," you know? And I go over there, I go... He goes, "You know what I love about your act?" I go, "What?" And he goes, "You don't go for the laughs." (laughs)
- JRJoe Rogan
(laughs)
- BCBryan Callen
I was like, "You motherfucker."
- JRJoe Rogan
Dom's the best at that.
- BCBryan Callen
Uh, he's hilarious.
- JRJoe Rogan
The s- the subtle diss-
- BCBryan Callen
Mm-hmm.
- JRJoe Rogan
The comedy diss.
- BCBryan Callen
Mm-hmm.
- JRJoe Rogan
I became friends with Dom... Well, I think I'd actually done an open mic night or two before I met him. But, uh, then, uh, I, or before I paid to see him, rather. But then, uh, not that long afterwards, so this is like four years later, like '92?
- BCBryan Callen
Mm-hmm.
- JRJoe Rogan
Uh, I was working with him in Montreal. We did the, uh...
- BCBryan Callen
Wow. That's intimidating.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah. It wasn't though. He was super cool.
- 47:39 – 57:19
Joe’s pool obsession: straight pool, world records, and mastery under pressure
- JRJoe Rogan
And, uh, so we did Montreal together and then I was in Amsterdam Billiards. This is in my almost became a professional pool player stage. Like, if, if pool was a l- a real career, like golf-
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
... I would've become a pool player.
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
I just loved it. I loved the pool halls-
- BCBryan Callen
You're lucky you didn't get into golf, dude.
- JRJoe Rogan
... and the people. I'm so lucky.
- BCBryan Callen
You're a maniac.
- JRJoe Rogan
Terrified.
- BCBryan Callen
You're fucking crazy.
- JRJoe Rogan
But, um, I loved the, the pool players. I loved the, this, the hang. They were just so different.
- BCBryan Callen
Mm-hmm.
- JRJoe Rogan
They were outcasts and they were loose and fun and we, we said ridiculous shit to each other and everybody was laughing all the time. It was always fun. Um, and, so I was playing pool every night. And so, uh, I had a gig and, uh, before the gig, I think, or maybe after the gig, I went to Amsterdam. And, uh, Dom Irrera pulls up and he's got his own cue. And I was like, "Dom, you play pool?" And he's like, "Yeah, you play pool?" I go, "I fucking love pool." I go, "Let's play some pool." And he was good.
- BCBryan Callen
Wow. Wow.
- JRJoe Rogan
We- we were playing straight pool.... which is like the type of pool they played in the movie, The Hustler. It's very rarely played in America anymore, but it's an amazing game. You play with a stack of 15 balls, and you knock off one. The first break is like a safe break, and everybody moves balls around till someone makes a mistake and leaves an opening, and that guy smashes into the balls, and then you run as many balls as you can in order. So it's called 14-in-one.
- BCBryan Callen
So it doesn't matter if it's solids or strips?
- JRJoe Rogan
Doesn't matter. You leave 14 balls on the table, and the one ball, like, you leave a break ball, and then you rack the other 14. And so, you shoot the break ball in, the idea is to collide your cue ball into the stack and keep running. So let me give a shout-out to Jason Shaw, 'cause Jason Shaw, who's one of the best pool players on Earth, one of the greatest of all time, he just broke the world record in straight pool this week.
- BCBryan Callen
Wow.
- JRJoe Rogan
And I think, I think he ran 839 balls. Jason with a Y, J-A-Y.
- BCBryan Callen
So he, he made-
- JRJoe Rogan
Dude from Scotland.
- BCBryan Callen
... 839?
- JRJoe Rogan
In a row.
- BCBryan Callen
Fuck.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah. He's trying to get to a thousand.
- BCBryan Callen
That's insane.
- JRJoe Rogan
So he got 832. 832. So the record before was set by Willie Mosconi in, like, the '60s and it was on an eight-foot table with big pockets. That was, like, 500-and-something balls. So he beat that. He ran 714 balls, so that was the previous world record he also owned, and then he just ran 832 balls. When I tell you, like, the concentration involved in doing that... 'Cause you're talking about hours of play. I mean, I don't know how many racks of 15 balls is 832. Someone do the math.
- BCBryan Callen
I think when you d-, I think when you get that good at anything, you learn about ev-, you learn everything about life. Like-
- JRJoe Rogan
Well, he's a wizard.
- BCBryan Callen
... and about yourself.
- 57:19 – 1:24:53
Regenerative farming, predators, and Joe’s ‘ranch community’ dream
- JRJoe Rogan
You know who you should talk to? You should have Will Harris on your show.
- BCBryan Callen
Who's that?
- JRJoe Rogan
Uh, Will Harris runs, um, this amazing farm in Georgia where it started out as a industrial farm that his family owned, and he converted it to regenerative agriculture-
- BCBryan Callen
Oh, yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
... over 20 years, and it took him forever to do it. What's the name of the farm again, Jim?
- NANarrator
White Oak Pastures.
- JRJoe Rogan
White Oak Pastures.
- BCBryan Callen
White Oak Pastures.
- JRJoe Rogan
And then there's Joel Salatin who's a- a similar guy who, um, I think he was, they were talking about him having something to do with farming in the Trump administration. I don't know if that's come to pass, uh, but if it does, I- I really do hope that he'll be involved 'cause he's another brilliant guy who, um, runs a regenerative farm and-
- BCBryan Callen
Far- farming's no joke.
- JRJoe Rogan
And what they do is essentially their type of farming is recreating nature. So they just-
- BCBryan Callen
Mm-hmm.
- JRJoe Rogan
... contain nature. Instead of, like, having people, you know, shuttle all these cows into these stalls and put a fucking trough in front of them and like... No, these- these animals graze out on the field.
- BCBryan Callen
Mm-hmm.
- JRJoe Rogan
They just control where they go. And they eat what they normally would eat and they make sure that they get plenty of new ground, so they move them to new ground when they've used up all the grass. They push them over there. And then the chickens do the same thing. They- they have a chicken coop that's a mobile chicken coop. They push it out, they open it up, it- they run around. And then he's dealing with, like, hawks killing his chickens.
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah. (laughs)
- JRJoe Rogan
So he's gotta come up with ways to-
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
... mitigate the hawks.
- BCBryan Callen
That's like his... Yeah, this is like Mike Catherine Wood. You know Mike? Great guy. Do you know Mike Catherine Wood? He was on, uh, uh, Loveline.
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh, yes.
- BCBryan Callen
Great guy.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yes, yes, yeah. I know Mike, yeah.
- BCBryan Callen
And he lives in Austin. So he-
- JRJoe Rogan
What do they call him? What's his- his name on the radio show?
- BCBryan Callen
Psychomic Catherine Wood.
- JRJoe Rogan
That's right.
- BCBryan Callen
So Mike gets... Mike comes down with his- his wife, who's an actress, and they're like, "I'm gonna- I'm gonna- I'm gonna be in Austin on the outskirts and I'm gonna, I wanna live on a farm." So he's-
- JRJoe Rogan
Did he move here?
- BCBryan Callen
Yeah, he's a kid from- from LA. He goes, "I get here and we got guinea fowl, we got little sheep, we got, you know, rabbits, we got... And fucking the snakes are eating all my eggs."
Episode duration: 2:46:20
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