EVERY SPOKEN WORD
150 min read · 30,007 words- 0:00 – 0:02
Intro
- JRJoe Rogan
[upbeat music]
- 0:02 – 2:24
Red light therapy for vision, recovery, and using AI to research health claims
- JRJoe Rogan
Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out!
- SPSpeaker
The Joe Rogan Experience.
- JRJoe Rogan
Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day. [upbeat music]
- BKBert Kreischer
Hey, dude, hey, does the red light therapy really help your fucking eyes?
- JRJoe Rogan
100%.
- BKBert Kreischer
I'm doing it. I'm-
- JRJoe Rogan
Are we rolling? Yeah.
- BKBert Kreischer
My eyes are so fucked.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- BKBert Kreischer
I can't see, Joe. I'm-
- JRJoe Rogan
Get one of them Gary Brecka beds for your house. Well, there's a bunch of companies that sell them-
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah
- JRJoe Rogan
... but you want, like, a really powerful red light bed. I did it this morning. Dude, it, it changed my vision.
- BKBert Kreischer
I can't... When I'm in the shower, I can't read "shampoo," "bath gel."
- JRJoe Rogan
Whoa!
- BKBert Kreischer
Like, I'm like, "Dude, why do they need to be small? Can't you just make it big as fuck, so everyone can see it?"
- JRJoe Rogan
They're not that small.
- BKBert Kreischer
They're, I- well, they're... I, I can't see them.
- JRJoe Rogan
I know.
- BKBert Kreischer
And then I'm getting out naked, putting on readers to see what I'm fucking- [laughing] I've washed my hair with conditioner so many times. [laughing]
- JRJoe Rogan
[laughing] Yeah, mine was getting bad. Mine was getting where I needed these fucking things, which I haven't picked up in months.
- BKBert Kreischer
I heard you say that, and I was like-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah
- BKBert Kreischer
... dude, I was-
- JRJoe Rogan
Changed my life.
- BKBert Kreischer
I did, uh, went to Oasis Well the other day, and I did the red light bed every day-
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm
- BKBert Kreischer
... every day, until I googled how much it cost. The thing's fucking expensive.
- JRJoe Rogan
It's expensive-
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah
- 2:24 – 5:03
Which generation had it best? Tech milestones, 9/11, and the joy of prank-call culture
- BKBert Kreischer
So, like, so, like, I was like... I was, the other day, I was in bed, and I was like, "All right, I think my generation had the greatest run. Like, out of, out of all the generations around, my generation, Gen X, had the greatest run." We got great childhoods, right?
- JRJoe Rogan
Right.
- BKBert Kreischer
We got to experience cell phones. We got to be impressed by the cell phone.
- JRJoe Rogan
Right.
- BKBert Kreischer
We, uh, we had 9/11, which wasn't great, but it was a time where the country healed, right? Everyone wants a-
- JRJoe Rogan
For a couple of weeks
- BKBert Kreischer
... big tragedy, like the JFK shooting. You want that moment where you walk by a bar, and they're like, "What, what are you doing?" Like, "You haven't heard?" You... We got one of those.
- JRJoe Rogan
Right.
- BKBert Kreischer
We had the pandemic, which is insane.
- JRJoe Rogan
Right.
- BKBert Kreischer
We had our music probably better. We had rock. We had... I mean, just the, all, the internet took off, so we got to experience that. I think my generation, Gen X, that's yours, too, right?
- JRJoe Rogan
Right. Yeah, I'm Gen X.
- BKBert Kreischer
I go... So I asked that to ChatGPT, and then, and I was wrong.
- JRJoe Rogan
What do you mean?
- BKBert Kreischer
The greatest generation is actually labeled the greatest generation. It's my grandmother, your grandmother. They experienced horse and buggy. They then went... They saw cars. They saw television. All within the time they had horse and buggy, they saw people land on the moon.
- JRJoe Rogan
Eh.
- BKBert Kreischer
I mean, all that shit- [laughing]
- JRJoe Rogan
[laughing]
- BKBert Kreischer
... telephones. [laughing] Who got fucked were the baby boomers. They were just old enough to not understand cell phones.
- JRJoe Rogan
Right. They still-
- BKBert Kreischer
Like, they got fucked. Millennials got fucked. Millennials got real fucked.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, I don't know about the greatest generation. I think, I think you're correct. I think the passage of the internet, like, the internet going through our lives and, and cell phones, like... I experienced VHS tapes first.
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
Then I exper- uh, answering machines, that was a big one. Caller ID, you know who's calling you. You could just duck people.
- BKBert Kreischer
[chuckles]
- JRJoe Rogan
That was crazy.
- BKBert Kreischer
I remember when caller ID showed up, and then I remember star 69 showed up-
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh!
- BKBert Kreischer
... where you could block your caller ID. [laughing]
- JRJoe Rogan
Star 69 was good because you could call people back that were pranking you.
- 5:03 – 11:24
Comics who do it for the love: Fitzsimmons, Walsh, and Shane Gillis stories
- BKBert Kreischer
Dude, Greg... You know when people go like, "Uh, what kind of music you listen to?" And you talk to a real musician, like, you talk to The Black Keys, right?
- JRJoe Rogan
Right.
- BKBert Kreischer
And then you, you go like, "What are you guys listening to?" They're like, "Have you heard of The Velvet Thud or something?"
- JRJoe Rogan
Right, right. They've always got some obscure rap-
- BKBert Kreischer
And you're like, "No," yeah-
- JRJoe Rogan
... too
- BKBert Kreischer
... and they're like, "That's what you need to listen to."
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- BKBert Kreischer
When people say, "I listen to Sunday Papers," that's Fitzsimmons and Gibbons' podcast-
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm
- BKBert Kreischer
... I go, "You're real comedy fans." Those are the two funniest human beings alive. E- ever, Greg Fitzsimmons... When I got ready for Lucky, I brought him on the road with me. I was like, "Dude, I trust you. Just tell me where I'm sloppy, tell me where I'm lazy, tell me where I'm leaving jokes." And that first night, he was like, "You got a minute?" [laughing] And he went through my whole hour. He's like, "You, I think you're leaving this on the table."
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm.
- BKBert Kreischer
Dude, those motherfuckers are the funniest dudes alive.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, Greg's awesome.
- BKBert Kreischer
He is.
- JRJoe Rogan
We started out together. We, we started, like, one week apart from each other.
- BKBert Kreischer
For real?
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, literally. We went on the road, phew, God, in the early days, Greg and I traveled everywhere. We, we did open mic. We would drive to Rhode Island to do open mics together.
- BKBert Kreischer
... He was a great example of the first dude I ever saw talking about his family on stage, and it wasn't nerdy.
- JRJoe Rogan
Right. Right, right, right.
- BKBert Kreischer
Him and his son ran a th- train on his wife.
- JRJoe Rogan
What?
- BKBert Kreischer
It was a great joke. He was like, "I had my first threesome. Uh, s- it was with my son, so it's a little awkward." I'm fucking, "Great joke," up he goes, "My son was breastfeeding, and I was getting her from behind." [laughing]
- JRJoe Rogan
[laughing]
- BKBert Kreischer
"We had the high five in the middle." It's, [laughing] it's... But I remember hearing that as a k- You remember when-
- JRJoe Rogan
[laughing]
- BKBert Kreischer
... remember being a dad as a comic was, like, n- off limits?
- JRJoe Rogan
Right, right.
- BKBert Kreischer
And I saw that, and I just had Georgia. The second person I saw... The first person's Greg. The second person I saw, and I d- I mean, I'm talking just had Georgia, was Louis fucking C.K. I went and worked the road with him, and he was doing all the material for that first special that popped for him, and he was talking about his kids, and he was just like, "My daughter's a cunt."
- JRJoe Rogan
[laughing]
- 11:24 – 14:47
The Shannon Sharpe mix-up: Bert accidentally agrees he ‘lost everything’
- JRJoe Rogan
So I gotta tell you, before we find that, so Eddie Bravo called me the other day, and he goes, "Did Bert Kreischer lose everything and then get it back?" I go, "What?" And he goes, "Yeah, it was so confusing. He was on, uh, Shannon Sharpe's show, and Shannon says, says to Bert, 'What was it like? You lost everything, and then you had to build it back.' And he goes, 'It seemed like it wasn't true.' I go, 'It's not true!'" And I go, "Did Bert go along with it?" He goes, "Yeah." I go, "What?" [laughing] And I couldn't wait to talk to you about it, 'cause I could totally picture someone saying to you some story that totally never happened, and you not wanting to be confrontational, so you just go along with it. Is that what happened?
- BKBert Kreischer
[laughing] 100%.
- JRJoe Rogan
100%.
- BKBert Kreischer
The fucking whole show!
- JRJoe Rogan
How did you not say, "That never happened"?
- BKBert Kreischer
I don't know. He just caught me off guard.
- JRJoe Rogan
[laughing] He caught you off guard?
- JRJoe Rogan
... like, [laughs] did, did at any point in time, did you say, "I should probably say this never happened?"
- BKBert Kreischer
[laughs]
- JRJoe Rogan
No?
- BKBert Kreischer
I was like... He was like, "You lost everything." In my head, I was like, "I did?" [laughs]
- JRJoe Rogan
[laughs]
- BKBert Kreischer
He was like, he was like, "But you made it all back." And I go, "I did?" [laughs]
- JRJoe Rogan
Where is this coming from?
- BKBert Kreischer
I have no idea. [laughs] He said it, and I just was like, "Uh-huh. Uh-huh."
- JRJoe Rogan
[laughs] Why did you say that never happened?
- BKBert Kreischer
I don't know. I don't even know what I said after. He's like, "How did you do it?" And I just [laughs] was like, man, I just was like, "I don't know, Shannon, I just focused and really started..." Like, I have no fucking clue. I should not be allowed to talk on microphones. [laughs] I literally was like, I don't know what I said even after it, to be honest with you, but I was like, "I guess he has it in his notes." So I was like, "Yeah."
- JRJoe Rogan
And so someone must have Googled, did Bert Kreischer... It was probably some Reddit thread, Bert Kreischer lost everything.
- BKBert Kreischer
I guess, and like, you know, the stories about you online are, are more prevalent than the true ones, so you just go, "I guess that's what he heard." So it's like-
- JRJoe Rogan
And you just went with it?
- BKBert Kreischer
I don't know. I don't-
- JRJoe Rogan
That's so weird to do.
- BKBert Kreischer
I was... I had no... I, I was like, in my head, I was like, trying to think maybe he was talking about, like, you know, I had development deals when I got into the business.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, but you didn't lose them. They gave you money-
- BKBert Kreischer
No, no, no, but then-
- JRJoe Rogan
It just never became a show.
- BKBert Kreischer
But then, no, but I'm saying, like, maybe... I was, in my head, I was like, maybe he's thinking that, like, you know, I had a lot of development deals early, and then I didn't for a few years, and I worked the road, and maybe that's what he was saying, and then I made... I'm back. I don't know. I was like, I was-
- JRJoe Rogan
But even when you worked the road, you worked the road, then you had the Travel Channel show.
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
There was no period where it made sense.
- 14:47 – 26:55
Luck, viral moments, and career inflection points (Mencia, Burr, Segura, Gillis)
- BKBert Kreischer
It's, it's... You know, it's... When I got out, I was like, it's... I don't, I don't mean this with disrespect, but it's less Shannon and I think more his producers, 'cause he's got cards. So I think the producers are like, "What, what clip's gonna pop?" I think they go online.
- JRJoe Rogan
Right, they try to find controversial subjects. [sighs]
- BKBert Kreischer
Like, he brought up, I told you, he brought up one, he's like, "Bert, you think Kevin Hart's just lucky." And I was like, "Motherfucker."
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh.
- BKBert Kreischer
I was like, "I said that fucking 12 years ago." And it was just, it was all it was, and I know I'm, I'm even... But it was... This is what it was, Joe, is like, at a time when I, w- we w- none of us were making money. Not you, but like, uh, the younger comics were making money, and you're online, and you watch Kevin, and, you know Kevin knows I love him, but Kevin's like, "I'm the hardest working motherfucker. I'm the hardest working..." And in my head, I was like, "We're all working hard." Like, uh, but a lot of people, you know, were just, you know, waiting for a moment to, to, to get in front of people. And then I was like... And then I had an agent, very casually, like, not mine, but at a thing, he goes, "You know, Kevin should mention how lucky he got." I said, "What do you mean?" He was like, "You know about Fool's Gold, right?" I was like, "No." He's like, "Well, that's the beef between Kevin and Katt, is Katt packed a gun in his luggage to go shoot Fool's Gold, and he got detained. And they were in production, and they're like, 'We need, we need someone small and Black to fit these clothes. We already got clothes for him.' Yeah." And he's like, "Get Kevin Hart." And that was the story I wanted Kevin to tell because that, as a comic, you can kind of put your head around that. And I've, and I've... And by the way, I did not do a good job of explaining it on Shannon's show because it's like, I, you know I'm a fucking talk out of my ass, but, like, every comic has had these, like, moments that skyrocket them, right? These moments-
- JRJoe Rogan
Right
- BKBert Kreischer
... that pop, and, and I went through it, and I think you'll understand it now, but for me, it was the Machine story going viral. For, for Bill Burr, it's the Philly rant. With Bill, that Philly rant just put him in the next level. Jim Jefferies, he gets punched in the head at the Comedy Cellar or Comedy Store in London. His manager happens to be a guy that knows the internet, Brett Vincent, posts it on MySpace, goes viral. Every comic that pops always has that... Tom, as, as I was telling this to Tom, he goes, "Yeah, it was me, Netflix." He was like, Tom got on Netflix. I mean, I didn't even realize this. Tom said it to me. He got on Netflix when there were two comics on Netflix: Bill Burr and Tom Segura. Bill puts his special out, they're like, "Did you like Bill Burr? You might like Tom Segura." And Tom's like, "If Comedy Central had bought my hour, I would've been fucked."
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm.
- BKBert Kreischer
"But instead, I sold it to this small streamer, Netflix, and the only other one they had was Bill Burr." And so, as comics, I think sometimes, and you know how much I believe in luck, it's so e- it's easier to hear about someone's luck, where you go, "Oh, that is crazy, that happenstance." I mean, we've said it about you, and I know you, you'll probably disagree, maybe to a certain extent, but your... I thought, I think the greatest thing that ever happened to you was that getting kicked out of the Comedy Store. That m- that period of time where you had to reeval- reevaluate yourself, and you created this, what you have, and you re- I, I mean, you would speak to it better than I could, but I think as comics, we look at you reinventing yourself, and reima- imagining yourself, and, and making it your own fucking entity, and creating this podcast, which has changed all of our lives. That moment, and it must have been tough to lose your agent, get kicked out of the Comedy Store, and have to figure things out, that we all got be- everyone got behind you. Everyone was like, "That's my guy." I mean, I'm curious what your feelings about that are?
- JRJoe Rogan
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- BKBert Kreischer
... in your career.
- JRJoe Rogan
I mean, that, that certainly had a, an impact. You know, it was also the Mencia video-
- BKBert Kreischer
Mm
- JRJoe Rogan
... where people could clearly see that I was right.
- BKBert Kreischer
Yes.
- JRJoe Rogan
And then we were all a victim, like, we were all hiding at the store. Like, when he would go on stage, or he would be in the back of the room if you were on stage, they would flash the light to let you know that he was in the room.
- BKBert Kreischer
Mm-hmm.
- JRJoe Rogan
You know how crazy that is, that there's a guy around that steals so much that they have to flash a light whenever a comic's on stage? And then comics would just start doing crowd work. Yeah, it was-
- BKBert Kreischer
That's, that's insane to me.
- JRJoe Rogan
It was crazy. So all the comics knew that what I was saying was the truth, and it was proved by, like, the consequences of someone who was already successful, right? So I was already on Fear Factor at the time. I was already a known person, and I lost my agent, and I got kicked out of the store. Like-
- BKBert Kreischer
That video, that video was, uh, i- akin to the Philly rant, Jim Jefferies getting pun- that viral moment for you, which you-
- JRJoe Rogan
It was also how well Redd Ban put it together, too, 'cause he's such a good editor.
- BKBert Kreischer
That music.
- JRJoe Rogan
He's so brilliant. It was music. He went back in time. He, like, it... You know, like, he spent a lot of time working on that. It was a work of art, but it was, you know, it was the first time that someone was held accountable because, you know, we don't have to na- name names, but we all know people who snuck through and still kind of have careers-
- BKBert Kreischer
Mm-hmm
- JRJoe Rogan
... although greatly diminished impact. Because, like, when they go on stage now, people are excited to see them 'cause they're famous, and then that immediately goes away-
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah
- JRJoe Rogan
... when you realize there's nothing there. They have no material. Because they have to write for themselves now. [exhales] Yeah, you see a giant drop-off. You see the early specials with, like, great jokes and really funny, and then you see, like, what is this nonsense? Towards the end, it's just, like, weird fucking, like, nonsensical rants on th- It's bizarre to watch, but that's what happens when you get exposed, and you have to do your own shit, and there's a few of those guys floating around out there.
- BKBert Kreischer
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. It's crazy because the one thing I-
- JRJoe Rogan
You want a cigar?
- 26:55 – 37:24
Online hate, comment doomscrolling, and the Miss Rachel/Whitney Cummings pile-on
- BKBert Kreischer
I don't know if I could've... I, like, I'm not good... The people always go, "You know, if they're talking about you, it's good."
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm.
- BKBert Kreischer
"All press is good press." And I... But anytime anything negative comes out about me, it fucking devastates [chuckles] me. I don't... Like, I could not have gone through what you went through.
- JRJoe Rogan
You just don't... I just don't read it. If you don't read it-
- BKBert Kreischer
But you don't, like, when you-
- JRJoe Rogan
... you're fine.
- BKBert Kreischer
Like, how do you... 'Cause, like, you come up in my newsfeed all the time.
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm.
- BKBert Kreischer
And, and, like... And I, I'm, I'm such a fucking idiot, that if I'm scrolling through Google News and I see my name, I go, "Oh, what's that?" And then I'm like: "Goddammit."
- JRJoe Rogan
You can't do that.
- BKBert Kreischer
Last time I did this show, greatest experience, great hang, lucky, streaming number one on Netflix. I'm so fucking happy. I'm in my bed going, "Things are going good for the big guy." Hit on Google News, and it's, like, picture of me and you, and it's like, "Bert Kreischer, Joe Rogan." And they're like, "Bert Kreischer ruins the Joe Rogan podcast." I'm like: "Motherfucker!"
- JRJoe Rogan
Ugh.
- BKBert Kreischer
And it was an MMA fucking ar- journalist, and I was like: "Wait, why do... Goddammit!" I was like, "Ugh." And then, and then you see it, and you're like: "Well, it can't be that bad. I'm gonna read it." And they're like... [snores] Oh, my God. But then my daughter, Georgia, said something very profound to me. She was like: "Why would you allow that?" And I'm sure that guy will write that same article after this episode. [chuckles]
- JRJoe Rogan
[chuckles]
- BKBert Kreischer
I'm sure he will. I think the guy also has a fucking football feed. He said I ruined the... Every, any anytime I do something, there's someone that says, "Bert Kreischer ruined it," [chuckles] and I'm the only one that reads it. And my daughter, Georgia, goes... Literally looked at me and goes, "Did you have fun with Joe?" I went, "Yeah, I had a blast. I love being around Joe." She was like: "Then fuck it." She goes, "Your experience is the one that matters the most." She goes, "What- why would you allow someone to dictate your memory of an event?" And I was like, "Oh, who the fuck raised you?" I was like, "I don't know."
- JRJoe Rogan
Well, you were on the road. She probably raised herself. [laughing] That's why she's so wise! She had to form her own opinions.
- BKBert Kreischer
She had to read books? [laughing]
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, she had to actually form her own opinions and think about things rationally, having a father like you. Yeah, you can't, you can't pay attention, 'cause the, the vast majority of people live miserable lives. That's the Thoreau quote, "M- most men live lives of quiet desperation." There's a lot of people out there that are very, very sad, very unhappy, and looking to make something negative. They're always looking to be a critic, which is fine, you know, that's their prerogative, but it's not... You don't have to read it.
- BKBert Kreischer
Well, it's... I, I'm at the place now... Like, I took Google News, I took all Google and everything off my phone, 'cause I- the pr- series premiered, and I didn't wanna get good or bad. I was like-
- JRJoe Rogan
Good
- BKBert Kreischer
... 'cause you can't, you can't quantify the good. Like, uh, like, if you're gonna, if you're gonna listen to the good, you gotta listen to the bad.
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm.
- BKBert Kreischer
And I was like, "Well, I don't wanna hear the bad, so I just wanna hear the good." And then, uh, and then we were, Jamie and I were talking about this outside, but, like, you have a, a social media team who's posting, like, like s- like, uh, like, your, your p- your claps. Like, they're posting, like, the nice articles, and I'm like: "Don't even post that, 'cause, like, I don't even... Like, just stay out of it. Just let... If people like it, let them like it, and if they don't-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, let people-
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah
- JRJoe Rogan
... have their own opinions. That's the best move. I don't have anybody that does that. I don't have any of that shit.
- BKBert Kreischer
Do you post all your own stuff on Instagram?
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah. On Instagram, if I post it, it's from me.
- BKBert Kreischer
Really?
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, always. Yeah. And then there's The Joe Rogan Experience page that the staff does, but that is just a clip from the podcast. They take an interesting clip where someone says something, it's put up with no context. It just says, you know, "Episode blah, blah, blah." That's it. I try to do it as, like, natural and neutral. You like it, you don't like it. If you don't like it, don't listen to the next one. It's okay.
- 37:24 – 44:37
Dream tech and lucid dreaming: communicating during sleep + Bert’s control dreams
- SPSpeaker
Uh, da, da, da, da.
- JRJoe Rogan
So this is very strange. This is about people being able to communicate-
- SPSpeaker
Yeah, whether or not-
- JRJoe Rogan
... in lucid dreaming
- SPSpeaker
- it's true, I guess. We'll find out later, but-
- JRJoe Rogan
Scientists report first-ever communication between two humans during sleep.
- BKBert Kreischer
Oh, I'd love this.
- JRJoe Rogan
Scientists say that science fiction may be coming closer to reality. According to reports, a California startup claims it successfully enabled two-way communication between people while they were lucid dreaming. Participants were asleep in separate locations while researchers monitored their sleep and transmitted a coded word designed to be perceived inside a dream without waking them. The system reportedly re- relied on sensors, wireless communication, and specialized software to detect dream states and relay the message. The company's founder says that what once sounded like science fiction could soon become a daily li- a part of daily life. No independent scient- but they're not saying what happened. No independent scientific replication has confirmed the results yet. Still, the experiment builds on real research showing that interaction between lucid dreams is possible. Yeah, but what is the interaction?
- SPSpeaker
The coded word, I guess, was it.
- JRJoe Rogan
Did they relay the coded word to each other? They both got the coded word?
- SPSpeaker
That's where I started getting into where it's based, but I'd found out... So this was posted on Instagram, like, yesterday or something.
- JRJoe Rogan
Uh-huh.
- SPSpeaker
Uh, I Googled it. Press release was from 2024.
- JRJoe Rogan
Breakthrough between-- breakthrough from REM space, first-ever communication between people in dreams. So this is the article about it in Business Wire. "Lucid dreams occur," blah, blah, blah.
- SPSpeaker
Does happen-
- JRJoe Rogan
"Participants are sleeping in their homes. Brainwaves and other polysom- somnographic data were tracked remotely, specially designed, uh, developed apparatus. When the server detected the first participant entered a lucid dream, it generated a..." How do they detect that someone's in a lucid dream? 'Cause a lucid dream is a dream where you're aware that you're dreaming.
- BKBert Kreischer
Yes.
- JRJoe Rogan
"It generated a random REMio word and sent it to him via earbuds. Earbuds. Participant repeated the word in his dream, with his response captured and stored on the server." What?
- SPSpeaker
Mm-hmm.
- JRJoe Rogan
"Eight minutes later, the next participate- uh, participant entered a lucid dream. She received the stored message from the first participant and confirmed it upon awakening." Huh.
- SPSpeaker
So now-
- JRJoe Rogan
I'm not... It's a little vague.
- BKBert Kreischer
It sounds like, it sounds like they're saying it in the room, and the person's grabbing it?
- JRJoe Rogan
No, it's, they're sending it through earbuds.
- SPSpeaker
Yeah, they were both in their own houses, it said at the time.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, so they receive it through earbuds. He says it in the dream, and then she receives it.
- BKBert Kreischer
No.
- JRJoe Rogan
Huh. Huh. Well, you gotta wonder what is happening in dreams. Dreams are very bizarre.
- BKBert Kreischer
Have you ever lucid dreamed?
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah. Yeah, not since... I mean, I, I've done it a couple of times, but I, I haven't on purpose, and I've always wondered why not. Like, why haven't I read books on lucid dreams? Why haven't I tried to do it?
- 44:37 – 51:29
Joe’s most unsettling dream: hyper-real ‘nonhuman’ encounter and memory distortion
- JRJoe Rogan
I had a, a dream that I came on the podcast I had to talk about because it was the absolute strangest, most realistic dream of my life. And it was a dream where I encountered these beings that were not human, and it was insanely realistic. They were very human-like. I think there was four of them. They were tall and thin, and they looked kinda... They didn't look human. Their heads were too big. Their eyes were too big, and I can't remem- I think they had teeth. I don't remember, but I remember they were joking with me. Like, they scared me, and they're like, "Ah!"
- BKBert Kreischer
[laughing]
- JRJoe Rogan
Just fucking around, like, trying to get me comfortable with who they are. And they were communicating with me somehow or another through thoughts, and, uh, I was really freaked out because they seemed very, very real. It didn't seem like any other dream that I had. So much so that I woke up at, like, 3:30 in the morning, and I just lay in bed for an hour trying to go back to sleep, and I couldn't go back to sleep. I was almost like, "I'm not sleep- I'm wide awake."
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
And so I went to the gym, and, uh, I just worked out at 4:00 in the morning, and I worked out for, like, two hours. And after it was over, I got in the sauna, did the whole thing, and then I came to work. I was like: "I have to talk about this right away," 'cause it was so strange. It was one of the only dreams that I've ever had that did not feel at all like a dream. It felt like I was encountering someone or something that was trying to get me comfortable with the idea of encountering them.
- BKBert Kreischer
Wow!
- JRJoe Rogan
It wasn't, it wasn't like a dream. It was... I was in the corridor of something that seemed, uh, like it was, it was not like it was from here. It was, like, from somewhere else, but it was almost like it was very oddly lit. Like, the walls were lit in a very strange way, but it was almost like it was, it was this corridor, but it had a feeling almost like it was organic, like it was alive, like it was a living thing. It was very fucking strange.
- BKBert Kreischer
What if, what if that was... Then this, but what if that is something that you did, in fact, an experience that was taken out of your memory, and then it's stuck in your memory, and you're dreaming about it?
- JRJoe Rogan
[tsks] I, [exhales] may- I don't know. I mean, you could maybe all day long, right? And so my feeling was that I had... And this is, again, it c- clearly could, was, I was dreaming, right? So it clearly could have been just a dream. But what it felt like was that it was an actual encounter with intelligence that wasn't human. That's what it felt like. And it felt like these things were not... They were not us, and maybe they were what a human will be someday because they were human-like, but they were very slender. They were very thin, and they were wearing these suits that were, like, almost like rash guards, like what surfers wear, but, but, but a strange fabric. Like, it looked weird, and it was the color of their skin, but it was clear that they were wearing something. It didn't appear that they had any genitals. They had no muscle tone at all. They were just thin, and they were communicating with me and looking at me, and they were, they were close, like where you are right now. And I think, like I said, I think it was at least three of them. I think there was four of them. But I remember there was one that was going like, pah! Like j- jo- and then like, "Ahhh," joking around with me, like, trying to scare me.
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
And then, like, pret- like... And it felt to me after they did it, like: "Relax." Like, "This is okay. Like, don't be freaked out. Whatever this is, don't be freaked out." And then I woke up, and when I wo- and then there was also this weird reptilian element of it. There was, like, a barrier. They had a barrier, and they were feeding, like, with... They were, like, pouring food to these things that a- almost like it was letting me know-... the, the protection between you and this horrific danger that's out there-
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah
- JRJoe Rogan
-in the world, in the universe, in life, is very, it's very thin. There's very thin protection. There's not much protection. There's just a, like a, like a barrier, like a s- a simple barrier, like a, [lips smack] you know, like a, a fucking, a, a blockade they put to keep a crowd from passing through an area to let you know you're not supposed to go here.
- BKBert Kreischer
It's crazy how-
- JRJoe Rogan
It's very weird.
- BKBert Kreischer
It's crazy, crazy how much you st- how long ago did you have this dream?
- JRJoe Rogan
A few months ago.
- BKBert Kreischer
But isn't it so wild that something that didn't happen-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah
- BKBert Kreischer
... can be locked in your memory, and then you just, you're like, "God!" It affects you s- almost like it did.
- JRJoe Rogan
Well, now it's like a memory of my recollection of the memory, which is odd, which is memories in general.
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
Which is why people distort memories and change them and make, you know, make the past something that's not really... You know, you've talked to people that... Yeah.
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, we all do it. Everybody does it.
- BKBert Kreischer
[chuckles] I do it on podcasts.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, everybody does it.
- BKBert Kreischer
[chuckles]
- JRJoe Rogan
But this was different. This, whatever this dream was... I mean, [lips smack] look, there's a lot of confusion about what happens during sleep, you know? We don't exactly know why you have dreams, and what it's all, what, what's the function of it, what's the purpose of it? But this one was different. It was much more realistic than any dream I had ever experienced before. Like, uh, the, the interaction between me and these, these creatures, these beings, was very different than anything I'd ever experienced in a dream. To the point like I, I, I felt it physically, and I woke up... I can sleep on a bag of rocks. I can just go to sleep, dude.
- BKBert Kreischer
Really?
- 51:29 – 56:04
Rasputin rabbit hole: podcasts to sleep, a pickled ‘hog,’ and Romanov-era power
- BKBert Kreischer
Do, do you listen to anything while you sleep, or you sleep in the silence?
- JRJoe Rogan
No, no.
- BKBert Kreischer
Oh, I listen to podcasts, so I'll have dreams-
- JRJoe Rogan
While you're sleeping?
- BKBert Kreischer
Always. Always.
- JRJoe Rogan
That's so ridiculous. [chuckles]
- BKBert Kreischer
I listen to-
- JRJoe Rogan
That's so unhealthy.
- BKBert Kreischer
I listened to a podcast about Rasputin last night. [laughing] I listened to-
- JRJoe Rogan
Did you ever see his dick? They have his dick pickled in a jar.
- BKBert Kreischer
Are you serious?
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- BKBert Kreischer
He, dude, he was the-
- JRJoe Rogan
He, yeah, the guy was hung.
- BKBert Kreischer
He... You know, he was just fingering chicks.
- JRJoe Rogan
Are you sure?
- BKBert Kreischer
Uh, I don't know.
- JRJoe Rogan
I think he was fingering.
- BKBert Kreischer
It's not, it's not in the-
- JRJoe Rogan
With a giant hog like that? I think he's putting it to use. Find Rasputin's hog.
- BKBert Kreischer
But he was... That's what he did. [chuckles]
- JRJoe Rogan
[chuckles] I am, of course you are.
- BKBert Kreischer
I would love to see his dick.
- JRJoe Rogan
[chuckles] Oh, you'll see it. That's his dick.
- BKBert Kreischer
Oh, my God!
- JRJoe Rogan
Look at the size of that hog. By the way, that's limp and dead. Imagine what that thing looked like when it was hard. Look at that, look on that guy's face. Look at the size of this cock. Look at this cock. Big old fucking pickled-
- BKBert Kreischer
That's a big dick.
- JRJoe Rogan
Un- me- I mean, like, again, this is like a dead man's dick, so there's no blood in it at all. You imagine what that thing was like hard? Big old Russian dick.
- BKBert Kreischer
[exhales] I-
- JRJoe Rogan
Big old ax handle.
- 56:04 – 1:02:40
Fame, meltdowns, and brain damage theories: Kramer and Chevy Chase’s falls
- JRJoe Rogan
It's a problem. Yeah, that's a problem for a lot of people that have, like, significant... Like Kramer, like, you know, like-
- BKBert Kreischer
Two things.
- JRJoe Rogan
Well, a couple things.
- BKBert Kreischer
[chuckles]
- JRJoe Rogan
This is the other thing. Do you know he wrote a book and didn't mention that in the book?
- BKBert Kreischer
Really?
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- BKBert Kreischer
That's interesting. [chuckles]
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, somebody read the book. One, one of the comics read the book. He's like, "I'm waiting for that to come up," because he never fucking brings it up.
- BKBert Kreischer
What's the, what's the title? A Tell-All Book, Except for One Thing. [chuckles]
- JRJoe Rogan
[chuckles] Except for the fucking biggest thing that's ever happened.
- BKBert Kreischer
The biggest thing that ever happened in my life.
- JRJoe Rogan
Don't tell me that it was the first cancellation, the first public cancellation.
- BKBert Kreischer
Was that really the first cancellation?
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh, yeah, through viral video. The first public cancellation through viral video. Because I, I remember that night, because, uh, I think I was at the improv, and then I came over to the store.
- BKBert Kreischer
Oh, I do remember that night!
- JRJoe Rogan
And Brett Ernst was at the store. He had just come over from the Laugh Factory. He goes, "Bro," he goes, "I was just at the Laugh Factory." He goes, "Kramer was off the rails." He goes, "He went nuts. He got heckled. He started yelling the N-word at these fucking people in the audience." I go, "No!" He goes, "Dude, it was fucking crazy." He goes, "He was bombing, and they were heckling him, and then he starts dropping N-bombs." I'm like, "No way!" He goes, "Yeah, I don't know what the fuck he was on." But he, he did a set at the store. He seemed a little, a little speedy.
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
A little, you know, a little elevated, and then left the store, bombed at the store, and went over to the Laugh Factory, and that was that night.
- BKBert Kreischer
He did... Uh, he was at the improv the weekend before, and I was there, and he was, he was doing stand-up, but he was doing a d- a, a version of Kramer, a version of-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah
- BKBert Kreischer
... like, crazy, and he fell on a glass-
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh, Jesus Christ
- BKBert Kreischer
... and broke the glass and cut him- But everyone laughed, and I think everyone was like, "I think he's bleeding." But it was, like, really off.
- JRJoe Rogan
Well, he was doing really off stuff from the jump. Like, he came to the store. I think he just decided to start doing stand-up, 'cause Seinfeld had been canceled for a long time, wanted to start doing something again.
- BKBert Kreischer
Mm.
- JRJoe Rogan
And he started doing stand-up, but he didn't have any material.
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
He would just kind of fall down. It was weird. He would, like, pretend that something went wrong, and, like, try to do the mic stand and slip and fall. It was very odd, which is also my theory that I've been telling everybody about Chevy Chase.
- BKBert Kreischer
Ooh.
- 1:02:40 – 1:18:09
Watergate as deep-state coup: Tucker Carlson clip, Bob Woodward, and media as power tools
- BKBert Kreischer
Allegedly.
- JRJoe Rogan
Allegedly. I mean, I don't know. I mean-
- BKBert Kreischer
I read some books.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, but the, the book on... Do you know what happened when Bill Murray was here, when he was talking?
- BKBert Kreischer
Wired?
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- BKBert Kreischer
Are you talking about Bill the-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- BKBert Kreischer
I love that book.
- JRJoe Rogan
So when he read Wired, he read... So the guy who wrote Wired was Bob Woodward. Bob Woodward was the guy that was involved in Watergate. He was the naval intelligence officer who became a journalist, and his first ever assignment was to take down the president, which is very suspicious. Like, Tucker Carlson told me the whole story behind it, and I was like, "What?" The people that were break- that broke in were all FBI. The whole thing was a setup. It was to set Nixon up, and they'd already gotten rid of Spiro Agnew, who was his VP. They got him on, I think, corruption charges. I forget what it was.
- BKBert Kreischer
Didn't Kennedy put the, the bug system in there? Wasn't the... It was the president before that put the, put the wire, the wiring in the, inside the room, right?
- JRJoe Rogan
What room?
- BKBert Kreischer
In Watergate. Didn't, was, didn't-
- JRJoe Rogan
No. No, no, no, no, no. Listen, it was a setup. Nixon was not involved in the setup, but they told him about what happened, and then he was involved in the cover-up.
- BKBert Kreischer
Oh.
- JRJoe Rogan
That's how they got him.
- BKBert Kreischer
Okay, okay.
- JRJoe Rogan
That's how they got him, and that's how he-
- BKBert Kreischer
But the re-
- JRJoe Rogan
... got removed from office.
- BKBert Kreischer
And the recordings were from his office, right?
- JRJoe Rogan
The recordings were from the Democratic Party.
- BKBert Kreischer
Oh, shit.
- JRJoe Rogan
So he was recording the Democratic Party. He was re- re- recording... He was secretly recording the opposition party, but he didn't do it. So the FBI did it, and then they brought it to him, knowing that he would cover it up, and that's where he committed the crime. Like, instead of coming out and saying, "Hey, some people have, uh, recorded these people..." But even if he did that, they would've said he was involved, but the, the whole thing was to get him out of office. The reason why they wanted to get him out of office was 'cause he was publicly and privately stating, at least amongst other people that were in the White House, and, that he knew who killed JFK, and he was gonna get to the bottom of it. Because, look, JFK had just been killed. He ran against JFK in six- in 1960. '60 or '62? '62? What year was it? Either way, I think it was '60. He ran against JFK, and then JFK gets assassinated, and now he's the president. And when he's the president, he was publicly stating or privately stating to different people, like, he was gonna get to the bottom of it, and he knew who killed JFK. He was, like, in- investigating it. He was interested in it, obviously, 'cause he was worried they were gonna kill him. And so then they set him up, and they removed him from office, and they put Gerald Ford in as his VP. Gerald Ford was also on the Warren Commission. Like, the whole thing was a giant setup to get rid of the most popular president in the history of the country. You know, and everybody's like, "Oh, Nixon's a crook. Nixon's a... I'm not a crook." That was all, like, this gigantic propaganda PR campaign to remove Nixon from office. It was all a deep state operation.
- BKBert Kreischer
Wow!
- JRJoe Rogan
Nixon won the presidency by, like, the widest margin of anybody in history. He was the most popular president in history. And in today's days, we think of Nixon as being a crook-
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah
- JRJoe Rogan
... and a scumbag, but he didn't even do it. He was just involved in the cover-up when they brought it to him. Was like, "What is he gonna do?" He's running for president again, to re-election, and they're saying, "You know, hey, these guys, they busted these guys recording things. Like, cover it up, cover it up, cover it up." And so that's how they got him.
- BKBert Kreischer
And what was his post-presidency like?
- JRJoe Rogan
So what do you mean? Let me finish.
- 1:18:09 – 1:51:44
COVID aftermath: boosters, clots, vitamins/IV treatments, and pharma-advertising incentives
- BKBert Kreischer
I got vaxed, like, four times. Like, with boosters from W- W. Johnson, Johnson & Johnson.
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm.
- BKBert Kreischer
And, uh, that's the first thing they say when they start looking at blood clots. They're like: "Did you get vaccinated?" And I was like, "Yeah, four times." Even doctors are like, "Fuck, you didn't need to do it four times."
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, well, I don't know why you did that.
- BKBert Kreischer
'Cause you had to get into a goddamn concert. You had to show fucking-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, but you didn't have to have four of them to get in a concert.
- BKBert Kreischer
I had a T- uh, first one was real early.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- BKBert Kreischer
Like, I got it when, when you were gotten canceled for getting it.
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm.
- BKBert Kreischer
So, like, just, just Mexican people, and I just went in with a mask on, like, "Hola," and got a fucking shot in East LA, 'cause I had to go shoot a movie.
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh, wow!
- BKBert Kreischer
They're like, "Do not show your fucking face." And I was like, "I won't, I won't."
- JRJoe Rogan
Why not show your face?
- BKBert Kreischer
'Cause it was like... It was back when it was like, uh... It was just, um, [tsks] what was it? Need- not needy workers. What is it called? The... Remember, remember the first round of work-
- JRJoe Rogan
Support workers?
- BKBert Kreischer
It was like, uh, like, people you need in the count- you know?
- JRJoe Rogan
Right.
- BKBert Kreischer
And so I-
- JRJoe Rogan
Essential-
- BKBert Kreischer
Essential
- JRJoe Rogan
... essential workers?
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- BKBert Kreischer
And then I was shooting a movie, so they, they got me a pass to get a p-
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh, so you got it when you weren't supposed to get it?
- BKBert Kreischer
Well, yeah, way early.
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh.
- BKBert Kreischer
Way early.
- JRJoe Rogan
Interesting.
- 1:51:44 – 2:06:05
Awards, ‘already winning,’ and building bingeable TV: Free Bert, Netflix comps, and NewsRadio lessons
- BKBert Kreischer
Is that what's happening? I mean, I'm a little obsessed lately, you know, at, like, the, the money behind podcasting and podcasting kind of changing. You know, like podcasting has gotten a little more corporate, where the, where I f- I feel.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah?
- BKBert Kreischer
I don't know if you see it.
- JRJoe Rogan
In what way?
- BKBert Kreischer
Well, it's like, uh, I mean, I looked at the Golden Globes and who was nominated, and, uh, those were all... I mean, I think they're all, you know, corporate, corporate podcasts.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, let me, let me help with that. Um, so here's the thing. A lot of people say, "Why wasn't Joe Rogan nominated for the Golden Globes?" And like, "Why did, you know, Amy Poehler win?" I didn't submit. [laughs] So they asked me to submit to be nominated for the Golden Globes, and you had to pay $500.
- BKBert Kreischer
[chuckles]
- JRJoe Rogan
And the $500 is, like, for paperwork or whatever. I said, "No." Like, "I don't care. I already won." Like, you can't tell me I didn't win. I've been number one for six years in a row.
- BKBert Kreischer
[laughs] Wait, dude-
- JRJoe Rogan
All of a sudden, you're gonna have a contest in front of all these people wearing tuxedos, and you're gonna say, now I'm not number one? Like, fuck off.
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah.
- JRJoe Rogan
You can't... Like, I don't care that I'm number one, but I am, in fact, number one. So if all of a sudden you have a contest to decide who's really number one amongst us-
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah. [chuckles]
- JRJoe Rogan
... Like, that's amongst you. You're allowed to have your opinion. You like Amy Poehler better than me? That's great.
- BKBert Kreischer
Oh, that's so-
- JRJoe Rogan
I don't care
- BKBert Kreischer
... fucking funny, Joe. Do you know how many people have been, like, ride or die for you? Like, "The, the fact that Joe Rogan didn't win, the fact that..." And I've heard that so much that it's so funny you just didn't submit.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, they asked me to.
- BKBert Kreischer
[exhales]
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah, I was, like, one of, like, six candidates. It's, they took the top people. They basically just took the top people of the charts, but which, you know, is fine.
- BKBert Kreischer
First of all, Amy Poehler's podcast is pretty good.
- JRJoe Rogan
I haven't seen it.
- BKBert Kreischer
It's pretty good.
- JRJoe Rogan
I'm sure it's good. It won.
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah, it's, it's-
- JRJoe Rogan
And I'm sure someone must love it.
- BKBert Kreischer
It's, it's really good.
- JRJoe Rogan
If it sucked, they would give it to someone else, right?
- BKBert Kreischer
Yeah. Dax is really good.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah.
- 2:06:05 – 2:15:07
Happiness through struggle: documentaries, chickens, brutal workouts, and escaping online toxicity
- BKBert Kreischer
Do you, do you ever see the movie American Movie?
- JRJoe Rogan
What is that?
- BKBert Kreischer
It's about the two guys in Wisconsin trying to make a horror film called Coven.
- JRJoe Rogan
God, I think I did. Is it a long time ago?
- BKBert Kreischer
Long time ago. Documentary, and they're... One guy's done way too much acid.
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah. [chuckles]
- BKBert Kreischer
And it's just... It's, like, one of those movies where someone says to you, "You, you have to see this."
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm.
- BKBert Kreischer
And it's never gonna win an award, probably made no money, but it is the most fascinating... Okay, Jamie, can you pull the trailer up for that? If you, if you see this, you'll go, "I've saw it."
- JRJoe Rogan
Okay.
- BKBert Kreischer
It's the American Movie, Mike... Oh, what was the other guy's... Oh, this is so good, Joe.
- SPSpeaker
... MasterCard. Imagine a world where passion and perseverance outweigh polish, and dreams are both the driving force and the destination. What if I told you this world exists, not in some far-flung fantasy, but here in the heartland of America? This world is seen through the lens of an unsung documentary, where we meet Mark Boalsm-
- BKBert Kreischer
This is the trailer
- SPSpeaker
... a young filmmaker from Wisconsin.
- JRJoe Rogan
That's okay.
- BKBert Kreischer
The, it's... Have you seen it?
- JRJoe Rogan
I, I didn't... No, I didn't see this.
- BKBert Kreischer
Dude, J- Joe, this movie [sniffs] is-
- JRJoe Rogan
Maybe I did. I don't know
- BKBert Kreischer
... is so good, but it's one of those things that it's like, when you find something that you just fall in love with, like-
- JRJoe Rogan
Yeah
- BKBert Kreischer
... like, uh, that, that you can't explain to someone. Like Vernon, Florida. Have you ever seen Vernon, Florida?
- JRJoe Rogan
No.
- BKBert Kreischer
It's a documentary by Werner Herzog about... It was trying to... Him and another guy, another guy did it. He was trying to do a documentary called Nub City, right? It was about this place in Florida where a lot of people had lost limbs and were collecting insurance money.
- JRJoe Rogan
Oh.
- BKBert Kreischer
And he went in to do a documentary about that, and he got his life threatened, but he had all this footage. So I think Werner Herzog came in and dumped a little money in it, and he just made the bizarrest documentary about a guy talking about turkey hunting-
- JRJoe Rogan
[laughing]
- BKBert Kreischer
... and another guy talking about... Like, it's, like, four different personalities, Joe. It's on YouTube, you can find it.
- JRJoe Rogan
Werner Herzog does some amazing shit, man.
- BKBert Kreischer
Amazing shit! This thing, Joe, is like something you start watching, and you go, like, "I can't turn it off."
- 2:15:07 – 2:16:52
Competition, comedy communities, and the Helen Keller/Stevie Wonder ‘fraud’ rabbit hole (wrap-up)
- BKBert Kreischer
... where did you put that competitiveness? 'Cause I, I shelved my competitiveness. I don't have it in comedy. I, I have a competitiveness with the industry that I felt ignored me at times. Like, I've- I wanna prove things, like I did Fully Loaded, 'cause I never got on Oddball.
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm.
- BKBert Kreischer
And so I, I created that festival. I remember I was with, uh... We were at, at the Forest Hills Arena or whatever, the outdoor, uh, stadium. Someone's like: "Wow, this is crazy. Can you believe you did this?" And I went, "Yeah." And they're like: "What made you wanna do this?" I go, "'Cause no one would ever invite me." [laughing] And then they were like, "Wow, that was more of an answer than we expected." But like... And so there's a competitiveness with me internally, but I was very competitive as an athlete, like, uh, unhealthy, and it was gross.
- JRJoe Rogan
Mm-hmm. How was it gross? Like what sports?
- BKBert Kreischer
Uh, base- uh, uh, anything, anything I did. Anything I did.
- JRJoe Rogan
Well, I think that's Michael Jordan, right? When you're talking about Michael Jordan, he was the most health- unhealthy.
- BKBert Kreischer
Michael Jordan and Kelly Slater, the two ones, Tiger Woods, that I hear about, and I identify with the way their brain works, where I go... Oh, I have that grossness, where I create scenarios in my head to go, "That's it. I'm gonna fucking..." I'd, I'd build up a rivalry with- I have a guy that I think about to this day, who played baseball at Tampa Catholic. His name was Israel, and I had a competitiveness. The guy doesn't even know who the fuck I am. He never knew me. He was a pitcher for- [laughing] And I fucking... And I, and I'm- I apologize, Israel, if you're hearing this right now. We were 16, and I had a competitiveness in my head, and my goal was to hit him, to hit a line drive right back in the... And, and he was a pitcher, and he threw inside, and I crushed one off his kneecap, and they pulled him out of the game. And I stood on first base, and I was like, "That's how it goes." [laughing] Israel's 53 years old right now.
- JRJoe Rogan
That was your drive [laughing] ?
- BKBert Kreischer
That was my fucking drive.
- JRJoe Rogan
Your drive was to hit him with a line drive?
Episode duration: 2:47:15
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Transcript of episode gYcuTY7tnvk
