JRE MMA Show #16 with Brendan Schaub

Brendan Schaub 0:00 ... they get me all the time. I'm more famous than them.

Joe Rogan 0:04 Aye, aye.

Brendan Schaub 0:05 (laughs)

Narrator 0:05 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 0:05 (laughs) I wish we could tell you what we were talking about, but we can't.

Brendan Schaub 0:12 Oh, I wish.

Joe Rogan 0:13 Uh, yeah, we were talk- talking about Joey getting in trouble, though. He just, uh, just texted me about it.

Brendan Schaub 0:17 How's-

Joe Rogan 0:17 He's mad at these people.

Brendan Schaub 0:17 ... how's Joey Diaz getting in trouble with, what, the MMA community?

Joe Rogan 0:21 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 0:21 MMA outlets? (laughs) They have nothing to do?

Joe Rogan 0:23 Well, here's the thing, though. I see where they're coming from. They're, they're journalists. If someone says something that fucking outrageous about what Mackenzie Dern's derriere must, uh-

Brendan Schaub 0:37 He said, I s- I think your ass smells great right now, something like that.

Joe Rogan 0:39 Yes, something along those lines, we're trying to be careful how to, how to respect.

Brendan Schaub 0:40 Oh, the, you're talking about the comic, Uncle Joey, said this?

Joe Rogan 0:43 Yes, the comic, Uncle Joey. But I get it. I get where they would ... And then Vinny Magalhaes backed him up. I get it.

Brendan Schaub 0:51 Backed up Joey? (laughs)

Joe Rogan 0:51 Yeah, he backed up Joey, says something like, "And tasty, too."

Brendan Schaub 0:55 (laughs) Yikes.

Joe Rogan 0:55 Yeah, yikes. I get it. Um-

Brendan Schaub 0:58 I don't get it. That's Joey Diaz, the great comic, who's commenting on a hot girl in the UFC. He is not a writer. He is not a journalist. These writers have nothing to do, so they're like, "How can we get hits? Let's talk about Joey Diaz."

Joe Rogan 1:10 Right.

Brendan Schaub 1:11 'Cause no one's reading any of our shit.

Joe Rogan 1:13 I agree with you in s- somewhat, but he definitely did do it. Like, it ain't a bad ... Here's my thing. They could say whatever they want about what he said, but if he was your friend and he texted you that-

Brendan Schaub 1:25 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 1:25 ... you would do what I did. Look, 'cause I'll show you, he fucking texted me that before he tweeted it. (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 1:33 (laughs) Of course.

Joe Rogan 1:35 I love that Joey texts now. Joey never would text message, but now he's a-

Brendan Schaub 1:39 Oh, I hope he doesn't keep texting.

Joe Rogan 1:39 Joey Diaz is a full-on texter now.

Brendan Schaub 1:41 Is he?

Joe Rogan 1:42 Yeah, yeah, I'll text you.

Brendan Schaub 1:42 He still calls, though. He called me last week.

Joe Rogan 1:45 Oh, fuck yeah. Most of the time he calls, but, um, he texted me this. (laughs) Yeah, right there. See?

Brendan Schaub 1:52 It's Joey Diaz, man. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 1:55 (laughs) Sorry, folks. Wish I could let you in. You can go Google what he said. I'm trying to be respectful.

Brendan Schaub 2:04 It's, it's Joey Diaz. There, there's ... He can say whatever he wants. He doesn't work for the UFC. He's not a, he's not at Mackenzie Dern's gym.

Joe Rogan 2:12 You're right, you're right. I'm glad he does, I'm glad he does think like that.

Brendan Schaub 2:15 Hell yeah.

Joe Rogan 2:15 I'm glad he does send me texts like that. But if I was a news website and I was gonna report on, first of all, anybody who's reads-

Brendan Schaub 2:22 You want clicks?

Joe Rogan 2:23 Uh, yeah.

Brendan Schaub 2:23 You want clicks?

Joe Rogan 2:23 For sure, that's what they want. But also, anybody who reads that, are you really ... You're either gonna be like me or you're like-

Brendan Schaub 2:31 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 2:31 ... you're gonna start laughing or you're gonna get-

Brendan Schaub 2:33 Oh, it's 90-

Joe Rogan 2:33 ... really upset.

Brendan Schaub 2:34 Really upset?

Joe Rogan 2:35 And then you're not a Joey Diaz fan anyway. It doesn't matter. It's not gonna-

Brendan Schaub 2:38 You know, if, if you read that and 95% of that is dudes reading it and they're like, "That's hilarious."

Joe Rogan 2:43 Yeah, 95%.

Brendan Schaub 2:44 The other, the 5% are like, "What the hell? What are we doing?"

Joe Rogan 2:47 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 2:47 "How could you report this?"

Joe Rogan 2:50 Yeah, I think that's a good number, 95. 95% are sort of going ha ha.

Brendan Schaub 2:53 95% of dudes are like, "That's hilarious. I was wondering the same thing."

Joe Rogan 2:56 Some women will get upset, though, and rightly so.

Brendan Schaub 2:58 Oh, no.

Joe Rogan 2:58 If I had ... Just imagine if you were a dude and there was some big ol' giant Alexander Karelin-looking dude who wanted to fuck you.

Brendan Schaub 3:09 Mmm.

Joe Rogan 3:10 And he was always making jokes about what your butthole must smell like.

Brendan Schaub 3:14 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 3:14 Just stop. Just stop and think of what that would feel like. That wouldn't be a good time.

Brendan Schaub 3:18 If you're Mackenzie?

Joe Rogan 3:20 If you're anybody that someone is saying those things about, right?

Brendan Schaub 3:24 I-

Joe Rogan 3:24 I'm a just being, just trying to be open-minded. I'm not going all-

Brendan Schaub 3:26 You're, you're being super open-minded.

Joe Rogan 3:27 ... social justice warrior on you here.

Brendan Schaub 3:28 You kind of are.

Joe Rogan 3:28 A little bit.

Brendan Schaub 3:29 No, if you turn social justice, I'm fucking out.

Joe Rogan 3:31 I can't. I can't.

Brendan Schaub 3:32 I'm out.

Joe Rogan 3:32 It's not possible.

Brendan Schaub 3:33 I just, I'll feel, I feel sick.

Joe Rogan 3:34 It's not possible. But what I'm saying is, if you look at it from the position-

Brendan Schaub 3:38 Of MMA writer?

Joe Rogan 3:38 ... of, of, uh, of the person, the person whose butthole is in question, that would be an uncomfortable position to be in, right? Bunch of people talking about what your butthole smelled like. You're just trying to make a living on TV.

Brendan Schaub 3:49 (laughs) Just trying to make a living. But-

Joe Rogan 3:51 Just trying to choke a girl.

Brendan Schaub 3:52 ... you, you know what that is? It's, it's also Joey Diaz being complimentary.

Joe Rogan 3:57 Yes.

Brendan Schaub 3:57 You know, it, it'd be one thing if she was not an attractive female or something like that.

Joe Rogan 4:02 I agree.

Brendan Schaub 4:02 And she's obviously very attractive, which is what makes this funny.

Joe Rogan 4:05 I agree, 100%. I agree.

Brendan Schaub 4:08 Now, if he tweets out, "I wonder what Black Beast's asshole smells like," or something like that-

Joe Rogan 4:11 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 4:11 ... to fully redeem himself-

Joe Rogan 4:13 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 4:13 ... that's funny, too. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 4:15 I don't know. He might.

Brendan Schaub 4:16 He might.

Joe Rogan 4:18 Yeah, I don't know if he can get away with that.

Brendan Schaub 4:20 He might just throw it up there to give those Cheeto fingers something to write about.

Joe Rogan 4:24 Joey's coming on with Yoel Romero.

Brendan Schaub 4:26 I cannot wait for that.

Joe Rogan 4:27 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 4:28 I cannot ... It's gonna be a complete-

Joe Rogan 4:29 That's the craziest podcast ever. They're gonna talk in s- in, uh, Cuban and, I mean Sp- Spanish obviously, and then go back and forth.

Brendan Schaub 4:38 Translate for you.

Joe Rogan 4:38 And then go English and whatever, whatever he can't get, Joey's gonna help him out with, you know. Like if I'm, if I talk too fast or if I say something he doesn't understand, Joey's gonna jump in and then they're gonna ... (yells)

Brendan Schaub 4:50 It's gonna be awesome.

Joe Rogan 4:51 You know, fucking ...

Brendan Schaub 4:51 It could be awesome or a complete shit show.

Joe Rogan 4:52 Oh, it's gonna be amazing.

Brendan Schaub 4:53 But it's probably gonna be awesome. Yes, it's gonna be awesome, with you and Joey, anyone.

Joe Rogan 4:56 Well, Joey's just, he's a great entertainer. And people don't understand, like part of the reason why he's so funny is he knows what's entertaining for you.

Brendan Schaub 5:04 Correct.

Joe Rogan 5:04 Like, he knows, he knows how to be the life of the party like, like no one. Callan's pretty goddamn good at it too.

Brendan Schaub 5:09 Callan's up there. Callan can entertain a room.

Joe Rogan 5:11 Yeah. Cal- Callan can take over a room and, and-

Brendan Schaub 5:14 Some of the best there is.

Joe Rogan 5:15 ... bring the party.

Brendan Schaub 5:15 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 5:15 I think that's his best art form, honestly.

Brendan Schaub 5:18 Me too.

Joe Rogan 5:18 I've told him that. I think that your best art form is, like, inappropriate comedy around people who are trapped.

Brendan Schaub 5:23 Correct.

Joe Rogan 5:23 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 5:25 (laughs) Okay. Who are stuck at a party or some shit.

Joe Rogan 5:27 Yeah, you're at a playing with them or something and you can't go anywhere.

Brendan Schaub 5:30 He's the funniest person I've ... He's made me laugh harder offstage than, than anyone.

Joe Rogan 5:34 Than almost anybody, yeah.

Brendan Schaub 5:35 It's so ridiculous.

Joe Rogan 5:36 He's right there. He's right up there, offstage, with Joey. But onstage, Joey's just, he's on different planet.

Brendan Schaub 5:42 Different level.

Joe Rogan 5:42 Especially right now, he's on another planet. Although, though Callan's fucking hilarious onstage too, but Joey right now. Jesus Christ.

Brendan Schaub 5:49 Yeah, Callan just did his, uh, like his showcase at the Improv.

Joe Rogan 5:53 How'd that go?

Brendan Schaub 5:54 He did, you know, Callan, like, "Murder. He murdered. It was murder."

Joe Rogan 5:57 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 5:57 "Got killed."

Joe Rogan 5:58 Oh, that's good.

Brendan Schaub 5:58 But I've been hearing good things. I mean, we-

Joe Rogan 6:00 That's good.

Brendan Schaub 6:00 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 6:01 That club is, uh, not a fun, uh, not a bad club to work at now. I wish they would get rid of that stupid fucking-... piano on stage, though. That doesn't make any sense to me.

Brendan Schaub 6:10 The piano's weird and Brian makes the same joke about it every time.

Joe Rogan 6:12 Oh.

Brendan Schaub 6:12 It's hilarious.

Joe Rogan 6:13 Does he?

Brendan Schaub 6:13 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 6:14 I won't say what it is. There's- there's a part where you're standing, especially if you go anywhere back on the stage, where the people that are on the right side of the stage, like if you're facing the audience you're right, those people can't see shit.

Brendan Schaub 6:25 They can't see and there's not a lot of room either.

Joe Rogan 6:27 It's stupid.

Brendan Schaub 6:28 Yeah, it is strange.

Joe Rogan 6:29 It's stupid. Who the fuck uses it?

Brendan Schaub 6:30 Do they use it for anything, though? Does anyone get on there? It's fucking-

Joe Rogan 6:33 I don't know, man. We should have a-

Brendan Schaub 6:34 Is Carrot Top or some shit?

Joe Rogan 6:35 Well, I know Craig Robinson does on occasion. But how long has Craig-

Brendan Schaub 6:38 He brings his own, though.

Joe Rogan 6:39 Does he?

Brendan Schaub 6:39 Yeah. He usually has his electric piano, doesn't he?

Joe Rogan 6:42 Maybe. Owen Benjamin, Owen Benjamin can play the fuck out of a piano.

Brendan Schaub 6:46 But the ... Listen-

Joe Rogan 6:47 He even has-

Brendan Schaub 6:47 ... the moral of the story is no one's really using that.

Joe Rogan 6:50 He even has a nick- is it like Huge Pianist was like a website that he had or something, because he's a giant dude. Oh, nobody is using that fucking thing.

Brendan Schaub 6:57 No one uses it, no.

Joe Rogan 6:58 Get rid of it. Get rid of it. Owen doesn't need it, like most places don't need a goddamn piano.

Brendan Schaub 7:02 That's so old school.

Joe Rogan 7:03 Well, it's just in the way. It's a hindrance. It's taking away from the show. I really believe it takes away from the show.

Brendan Schaub 7:09 Can you name any other club with a piano on stage? Not really.

Joe Rogan 7:16 It's hard to think. It's just a stupid thing to have. It's like-

Brendan Schaub 7:19 But also, look what the Comedy Store is doing and then do that.

Joe Rogan 7:21 Craig Robinson with his own fucking keyboard. You're right.

Brendan Schaub 7:23 Yeah, he usually comes out with his own shit.

Joe Rogan 7:25 Yeah, he's probably got a bunch of shit hooked up-

Brendan Schaub 7:27 Sweaty.

Joe Rogan 7:27 ... to that thing, right? Look at him. I bet he DJ, DJs, DJs the fuck out of a party.

Brendan Schaub 7:33 He does look like a mean DJ.

Joe Rogan 7:35 He does, right?

Brendan Schaub 7:36 You know who else DJs is Shaq. You ever seen Shaq like straight up DJing? His giant ass is a DJ.

Joe Rogan 7:41 Really?

Brendan Schaub 7:41 Yeah. That's what he does like in his off time.

Bryan Callen 7:43 He's got platinum records, multiple.

Brendan Schaub 7:45 Being a DJ?

Bryan Callen 7:46 As a rapper.

Brendan Schaub 7:47 No, that Diesel CD went platinum.

Bryan Callen 7:49 He's, yeah, he's got two. I have- I have one of them.

Brendan Schaub 7:51 That's embarrassing.

Joe Rogan 7:52 (laughs)

Bryan Callen 7:52 Jackson Spade Returns. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 7:53 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 7:54 That's embarrassing. That's tough.

Bryan Callen 7:54 I didn't buy it. I got ... It was given to me.

Brendan Schaub 7:55 I saw some video of him DJing and it's like thousands of people, like kids just jamming out. Obviously high off their ass on ecstasy, but it looked like a good time.

Joe Rogan 8:03 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 8:03 That's what he does.

Joe Rogan 8:05 Why not, man?

Brendan Schaub 8:06 Why not?

Joe Rogan 8:06 Russell Peters is legit.

Brendan Schaub 8:08 DJ?

Joe Rogan 8:09 Legit DJ.

Brendan Schaub 8:10 Really?

Joe Rogan 8:10 Like legit, friends with all the old school rappers like Big Daddy Kane and shit.

Brendan Schaub 8:15 I had no idea.

Joe Rogan 8:15 Yeah. Dude, Russell is seriously legit. Like when we had him on the podcast a long time ago, he actually ... Look at the size of Shaq towering over that fucking equipment. (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 8:26 The biggest DJ in the world.

Joe Rogan 8:27 He's so big.

Brendan Schaub 8:29 He's so fucking big.

Joe Rogan 8:29 So crazy. Um, but Russell doesn't like those other guys calling themselves DJs, those like Tiesto guys.

Brendan Schaub 8:37 Really?

Joe Rogan 8:37 Yeah. He says that's not a DJ. He's like a DJ is someone who knows how to play records. These guys are like pressing play on their laptop and bouncing around-

Brendan Schaub 8:44 And mixing it, yeah.

Joe Rogan 8:44 ... with their hands up in the air.

Brendan Schaub 8:46 I mean, I think there's more to it, but I agree, kind of just hitting the playlists and doing your thing.

Joe Rogan 8:50 It's a different thing.

Brendan Schaub 8:50 I think there's more to that.

Joe Rogan 8:51 It's a different thing. But to those people that want to hear that different thing, those are the masters. It's like we-

Brendan Schaub 8:57 Correct.

Joe Rogan 8:57 I just think it's silly to get hung up on one art form or another, because in any art form you're gonna have ... There's Russell tearing it up. See, you know, he, he actually knows how to like mix-

Brendan Schaub 9:09 Oh, wow.

Joe Rogan 9:09 ... and scratch and all that shit.

Brendan Schaub 9:10 He's a talented dude.

Joe Rogan 9:11 He's a smart dude. Russell is a very smart dude.

Brendan Schaub 9:13 He's very smart.

Joe Rogan 9:14 A very good dude too, like one of the nicest people-

Brendan Schaub 9:17 Great guy.

Joe Rogan 9:17 ... I think I've ever met.

Brendan Schaub 9:18 Super great guy.

Joe Rogan 9:18 Like super, super fucking sweetheart.

Brendan Schaub 9:20 First man to roast me on stage and hurt my feelings, but then that was the way of just kind of initiation.

Joe Rogan 9:25 It's because you're balls.

Brendan Schaub 9:25 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 9:25 Little ball busting, little busting of the balls. He's just, uh-

Brendan Schaub 9:30 I love him.

Joe Rogan 9:30 Yeah. He's a sweetheart. But, um, he's like super passionate about old school DJing, like with record players and shit. Like he's really good at that. And there's an, there is an art to that.

Brendan Schaub 9:40 Yeah. But that's why he hates on these new guys like DJ Tiesto and whoever the hell is.

Joe Rogan 9:44 Well, he doesn't hate on them. He doesn't hate on them. He just doesn't think that they should call themselves DJs.

Brendan Schaub 9:49 Who would you call?

Joe Rogan 9:49 Because he's like, "A DJ is a disc jockey." You know what I'm saying?

Brendan Schaub 9:52 They're like a new age disc jockey though.

Joe Rogan 9:54 But they're not a disc. They don't have a disc. He's got a disc and that's part of his art.

Brendan Schaub 9:59 Literally.

Joe Rogan 9:59 He's moving that disc.

Brendan Schaub 9:59 It's true. Electric disc jockey.

Joe Rogan 10:02 I see his point. I see his point is li- look, I just think people ... Look, people love that kind of music, obviously.

Brendan Schaub 10:08 It's huge.

Joe Rogan 10:08 Like that Calvin Harris shit.

Brendan Schaub 10:10 Hell yeah.

Joe Rogan 10:10 And I'm not saying shit in a bad way, it's just-

Brendan Schaub 10:12 It makes us jams.

Joe Rogan 10:13 ... a way of describing it. But as you're driving down the road in Vegas, man, you see these big ass Calvin Harris-

Brendan Schaub 10:18 Diplo.

Joe Rogan 10:18 ... posters and shit. And yeah, Diplo.

Brendan Schaub 10:20 Huge, man.

Joe Rogan 10:21 All those electronic guys. I mean, obviously people love that sound. So I don't think he's saying that they suck, I just think he's saying it's a different thing.

Brendan Schaub 10:29 Different.

Joe Rogan 10:30 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 10:30 Right.

Joe Rogan 10:30 Because like obviously if you wanted to hear that shit and you go ... went there and Russell was scratching records, you'd be like, "Come on."

Brendan Schaub 10:36 (laughs) Come on, bro.

Joe Rogan 10:37 I'm here to do ecstasy here and listen to ...

Brendan Schaub 10:38 What are you doing? Yeah.

Joe Rogan 10:41 Da, da, da, da, da, da, da.

Brendan Schaub 10:41 Let the bass drop. Boom, boom, boom, boom.

Joe Rogan 10:44 Da, da, da, da, da, da, da.

Brendan Schaub 10:45 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 10:45 Da, da, da, da.

Brendan Schaub 10:46 You know ... (laughs)

Joe Rogan 10:47 You know? Disc jockey, a person who introduces and plays recorded popular music, especially on radio or at a disco.

Brendan Schaub 10:54 They're electric DJ jobs.

Bryan Callen 10:55 They don't know what they're doing though?

Joe Rogan 10:56 Maybe time to update that fucking...

Brendan Schaub 10:57 Kind of, yeah. It's super old school.

Joe Rogan 10:58 What the ... What the fuck is a disco?

Brendan Schaub 11:00 Dude.

Joe Rogan 11:00 At a disco. At a disco? How about a ballroom?

Brendan Schaub 11:04 The thing about those DJs like, uh, Steve Aoki, he had a documentary on Netflix, which was ridiculous, but because they're not like live performing, they can do more shows than anyone. So like Steve Aoki was on the road 300 days out of the year and made something like-

Joe Rogan 11:17 Oh my God.

Brendan Schaub 11:18 ... 300 ga-gillion dollars, private jet. He's going from Amsterdam to China.

Joe Rogan 11:23 Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.

Brendan Schaub 11:23 Yeah, just nonstop. Yeah. That's all you do.

Joe Rogan 11:26 He was at the Onnit Lab. They had all these pictures of him working out there.

Brendan Schaub 11:28 I, I know I saw that. Yeah, yeah. He was the guy who was throwing cakes in people's faces, mainly girls. He'd toss cakes in their ... that was his thing. And then he hit one girl and her neck was like a kike gush. I think he had a lawsuit so he stopped throwing the cake in their face.

Joe Rogan 11:41 Yeah, don't throw cakes.

Brendan Schaub 11:42 It was awesome. People would ask for it though.

Joe Rogan 11:44 (laughs) This is what he'd do?

Brendan Schaub 11:49 Boom.

Joe Rogan 11:50 Oh, is that the girl that got hurt?

Bryan Callen 11:51 No.

Brendan Schaub 11:51 No, I don't know. Some girl got whiplash though.

Joe Rogan 11:53 So he would throw a cake ... Oh my God. With like a piece of cardboard underneath it, is that his move?

Brendan Schaub 11:58 That's just the bottom of the cake, you know what I'm saying? You gotta put it on something.

Joe Rogan 12:01 I got it. That seems, um ...

Brendan Schaub 12:03 Steve Aoki, longest cake throw, hits guy in a wheelchair. Well, that's not fun.

Joe Rogan 12:06 Oh, let's not watch this. I don't want to watch the guy in the wheelchair get hit in the head.

Brendan Schaub 12:09 He's all, "Yeah. Oh my God." (laughs)

Joe Rogan 12:12 ... maybe, may, maybe it's an honor, right? Maybe it's one of those things.

Brendan Schaub 12:13 No, it is. If you're a fan of Steve Aoki, it's like, "Hit me with the cake."

Joe Rogan 12:16 Right. Like, if you're, like, at the WWE and someone spits on you.

Brendan Schaub 12:20 There's a little b- bit of blood or some shit.

Joe Rogan 12:22 Yeah, if someone just... And it, did, did, did-

Brendan Schaub 12:24 Oh, yes.

Joe Rogan 12:24 ... they catch that conversation spit.

Brendan Schaub 12:26 Or in the NBA that when they throw their mouthpiece people catch them, it's disgusting. Happens in MMA too.

Joe Rogan 12:30 Mm-hmm, yeah, I've seen that.

Brendan Schaub 12:31 What are you gonna do with that thing?

Joe Rogan 12:31 I've seen that, yeah. Why do people throw them in the audience, man?

Brendan Schaub 12:35 I don't know, it's so disgusting.

Joe Rogan 12:36 It just seems so preposterous. What is this? Jamie, what is it?

Brendan Schaub 12:40 Oh.

Bryan Callen 12:41 This guy is lifting. You said blood, spitting blood, this is the guy lifting at the Arnold thing. Blood started going everywhere on him.

Brendan Schaub 12:44 Oh, he needs to see a, he needs to see a doctor.

Joe Rogan 12:47 So his nose starts spraying blood right in the middle of his lift.

Bryan Callen 12:50 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 12:50 Whoa, that's pretty cool.

Brendan Schaub 12:51 Bro.

Bryan Callen 12:51 They did, like, clean up everything. They take a little break there.

Brendan Schaub 12:53 You need to see a doctor, sir.

Joe Rogan 12:56 Ah, he's fine.

Bryan Callen 12:57 Yeah, he got the lift up done.

Joe Rogan 12:58 Got a little stomach and thing going on.

Brendan Schaub 13:00 That's internal bleeding.

Joe Rogan 13:01 He's got a little, uh, nah, it's probably a nasal infection.

Brendan Schaub 13:04 You think?

Joe Rogan 13:05 Eh.

Brendan Schaub 13:05 Bursting out like that?

Joe Rogan 13:06 Walk it off.

Brendan Schaub 13:07 Can't be good.

Joe Rogan 13:08 Guy just dead lifted 1,000 pounds. He looks pretty healthy to me.

Brendan Schaub 13:11 Yeah, he looked, he's-

Joe Rogan 13:12 How many did he dead lift?

Brendan Schaub 13:12 ... he's gonna live a long time.

Bryan Callen 13:14 939 it says.

Joe Rogan 13:15 Jesus Christ, (laughs) that's so much weight.

Brendan Schaub 13:16 It's a lotta weight.

Joe Rogan 13:17 That's so much weight. I saw a crazy one where a dude was doing this squat and the, the bar couldn't handle the weight. And the bar bent, and he couldn't get it back onto the, the rack. And so, he had to, like, kinda dive out from under it.

Brendan Schaub 13:30 But it snapped.

Joe Rogan 13:30 But he was squatting a shitload of weight, obviously.

Brendan Schaub 13:33 Jesus Christ.

Joe Rogan 13:33 Imagine having that kind of weight on you and you've gotta figure out how to get it off you?

Brendan Schaub 13:38 So dangerous.

Joe Rogan 13:38 Without hurting you? Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 13:39 Yeah, have you seen homeboy who, when they do the heavy squats-

Joe Rogan 13:42 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 13:42 ... and they blow their asshole out?

Joe Rogan 13:43 Oh, I did see that.

Brendan Schaub 13:44 That's a tough one.

Joe Rogan 13:45 Yeah. I was, I thought you were gonna bring up that guy who was doing, um... He was doing something in one of those CrossFit games. And he was doing, like, a clean and his arms gave out and it dropped down on his neck and paralyzed him.

Brendan Schaub 13:58 Damn. No, I was keeping it positive.

Joe Rogan 14:00 Keep going. He's a friend of Tate's. Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 14:03 Landed on his neck.

Joe Rogan 14:04 Mm-hmm, out, dead. Just fell down, body stopped moving.

Brendan Schaub 14:08 Damn, now he's paralyzed?

Joe Rogan 14:08 Now he's paralyzed from the neck down. Just boom, like everything just shut off. He, it landed on his neck.

Brendan Schaub 14:13 Probably passed on the CrossFit from now on out.

Joe Rogan 14:15 Well, you know what? Some of these guys are s- too, almost too fucking tough for their own good with something like that, where you're holding something over your head.

Brendan Schaub 14:22 Doing 1,000 reps or whatever the hell it is.

Joe Rogan 14:23 Yeah, they're just, they're just trying to smash everybody's reps and show how badass they are, which is, you know, it's a competition.

Brendan Schaub 14:30 Damn, what a shame.

Joe Rogan 14:30 Steve Maxwell hates that shit. He says that, and I, I see other people's points too that it's beneficial, that the competition makes you work harder. But Maxwell's take on it is those type of exercise movements, like power cleans and things like that-

Brendan Schaub 14:44 They're not meant for that high reps, is what you're saying?

Joe Rogan 14:44 ... clean and presses, they're not meant for high reps.

Brendan Schaub 14:46 No, I agree with him.

Joe Rogan 14:47 Yeah, he's like, "Those are strength moves."

Brendan Schaub 14:49 Men-

Joe Rogan 14:49 "They're meant for low reps, couple sets, you know, heavy shit."

Brendan Schaub 14:53 100%.

Joe Rogan 14:54 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 14:54 That's not something... Your body shouldn't be doing that.

Joe Rogan 14:56 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 14:56 And the things that can go wrong-

Joe Rogan 14:57 Damn.

Brendan Schaub 14:57 ... are really gonna fuck you up, especially-

Joe Rogan 14:59 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 14:59 ... when you start going tons and you're losing your technique and your form.

Joe Rogan 15:02 Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 15:03 It's dangerous shit, man.

Joe Rogan 15:03 Yeah, you'll, you lose... And this guy was in, out of position too. I mean, j- his, his body was paralyzed.

Brendan Schaub 15:09 Damn, he's pissed. Tate's boy.

Joe Rogan 15:10 Yeah, Tate knows him. Tate, Tate's big in that... He's, uh, deep in that CrossFit world. He knows a lot of those CrossFit people.

Brendan Schaub 15:14 He does a lot of those... He has a Venice Barbell Club, or what's his thing over there? He does something off Lincoln in Venice. He's always f- he's always there.

Joe Rogan 15:22 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 15:22 They have like some strong man shit, there's caves everywhere.

Joe Rogan 15:25 Yeah, I know what you're talking about, but the name escapes me.

Brendan Schaub 15:27 God, me too.

Joe Rogan 15:28 The Box?

Brendan Schaub 15:29 No.

Joe Rogan 15:30 That's not it? The Box in Venice?

Brendan Schaub 15:31 No.

Joe Rogan 15:33 Whatever.

Brendan Schaub 15:34 Calen works at Venice Barbell Club.

Joe Rogan 15:37 Tate's always been into-

Brendan Schaub 15:38 Tate's somewhere else though.

Joe Rogan 15:39 ... some kind of that kinda working out.

Brendan Schaub 15:41 Is it Deuces?

Joe Rogan 15:41 Way back in the day. Is it Deuces? Yeah, okay.

Brendan Schaub 15:44 Deuce.

Joe Rogan 15:44 There you go, shout out to Deuces.

Brendan Schaub 15:45 Man, what's up, Deuce?

Joe Rogan 15:47 Yeah, Tate's always been into kettle bells and, you know, muscle ups and shit like that.

Brendan Schaub 15:51 Just cool.

Joe Rogan 15:51 And just CrossFit style movements. And he's a big fan of CrossFit, he loves it.

Brendan Schaub 15:56 Have you done, uh, a ton of, uh, CrossFit?

Joe Rogan 15:59 No. I mean, I've done, I do those kind of exercises, right? I do a lot of, uh, kettle bell stuff, I do dead lifts, I do a lot of things that I do-

Brendan Schaub 16:07 Like circuit training, but not-

Joe Rogan 16:08 Yeah, but I don't do it the way they do it.

Brendan Schaub 16:10 No me neither.

Joe Rogan 16:10 Like, I, I do that Pavel Tatsoulini method, where you're doing, like, sets of five. N- never more than sets of five.

Brendan Schaub 16:17 Yeah, I dig that.

Joe Rogan 16:18 And I take a lot of time off in between sets.

Brendan Schaub 16:21 I, uh, (clears throat) my schedule's been so crazy man, I haven't been able to go to the gym like I typically do. You know, where I, I, I work with my trainer and I'll do weights-

Joe Rogan 16:29 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 16:29 ... I'll do mi- stuff like that. So I've been trying to find some alternatives.

Joe Rogan 16:33 Yeah, man. It's fun to mix shit up.

Brendan Schaub 16:35 Yeah, I, I've been bored.

Joe Rogan 16:35 You know, just doing something different.

Brendan Schaub 16:36 Yeah, I've been bored, like I-

Joe Rogan 16:37 Take a yoga class, take a-

Brendan Schaub 16:38 I've been doing yoga, I've been doing hot yoga, which I love.

Joe Rogan 16:41 Some fucking Taekwondo, bro.

Brendan Schaub 16:42 That's some Taekwondo.

Joe Rogan 16:42 How about that? You wanna go deep?

Brendan Schaub 16:44 Hi-yah.

Joe Rogan 16:45 Double knife ambilock.

Brendan Schaub 16:46 Wanna go deep? (laughs)

Joe Rogan 16:47 After, post UFC career-

Brendan Schaub 16:49 (laughs) Wanna go deep?

Joe Rogan 16:49 ... front kicking motherfuckers.

Brendan Schaub 16:51 Wanna go deep? (laughs)

Joe Rogan 16:53 (laughs) It's a good workout though.

Brendan Schaub 16:53 You and I big you'll take the... I'll, I'll hard pass on that, man.

Joe Rogan 16:56 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 16:56 I don't want anything to do with martial arts.

Joe Rogan 16:58 (laughs) But here's the thing, it's, uh, if you like, do like, uh, some sort of McDojo style Taekwondo, as long as they teach you good technique, you're gonna get a good workout in.

Brendan Schaub 17:07 I'm trying to burn some calories. You know-

Joe Rogan 17:09 You'll, you'll get a good workout in doing-

Brendan Schaub 17:10 I'm sure, I'm sure.

Joe Rogan 17:11 ... those wheel kicks and shit.

Brendan Schaub 17:12 Hard pass for me.

Joe Rogan 17:13 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 17:13 Hard pass, Joe. Hard, hard fucking passes.

Joe Rogan 17:16 What about Aikido, just for a goof?

Brendan Schaub 17:18 (laughs) Just to, just to see if I can-

Joe Rogan 17:19 Just you with the, with the pajamas, just wrist locking motherfuckers.

Brendan Schaub 17:23 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 17:23 Flipping them, grabbing that wrist. Boom.

Brendan Schaub 17:25 (laughs) But-

Joe Rogan 17:26 You fly.

Brendan Schaub 17:27 You fluffy.

Joe Rogan 17:27 You fly into the ground-

Brendan Schaub 17:28 Just Steve Seagal?

Joe Rogan 17:28 ... with magic. Woo.

Brendan Schaub 17:30 That'd be sick.

Joe Rogan 17:31 Woo.

Brendan Schaub 17:31 Meat Seagal doing a thing.

Joe Rogan 17:32 Imagine, ah, the wrist makes you f- doing cartwheels. Oh, God.

Brendan Schaub 17:36 I go full deep on that.

Joe Rogan 17:37 No, it would be fun if you did it and you just, you did one of them Aikido demonstrations and you show what happens when someone doesn't just give in.

Brendan Schaub 17:44 Seriously, wh-

Joe Rogan 17:45 You'd be like... You know, they, he goes and grabs you and does this and you're like, push him away from you.

Brendan Schaub 17:49 And get at him. "Fuck off." Just embarrass him. I'd love that.

Joe Rogan 17:50 "What is this? What are you doing?"

Brendan Schaub 17:52 I'd love that.

Joe Rogan 17:52 They, they try to throw you and you just kinda push their head down.

Brendan Schaub 17:55 I like that.

Joe Rogan 17:55 Like, "Come on man, come on man."

Brendan Schaub 17:56 "Come on bro." Stop it, stop it.

Joe Rogan 17:58 Cover... Stopping it moving.

Brendan Schaub 17:58 I love it.

Joe Rogan 17:58 You don't try to counter him, you just go cut, just cut the shit off.

Brendan Schaub 18:00 Stop, just cut the shit.

Joe Rogan 18:01 Cut the shit.

Brendan Schaub 18:01 This is fake.

Joe Rogan 18:02 It's not.

Brendan Schaub 18:03 It's the worst promo ever for it.

Joe Rogan 18:04 This is not working. Ah, ooh, you have to like-

Brendan Schaub 18:07 (laughs) You have to like throw yourself at them.

Joe Rogan 18:10 It's all bullshit.

Brendan Schaub 18:11 Oh, yeah?

Joe Rogan 18:12 But apparently man, those dudes who were badass at it back in the day, it was about getting rid of swords. Guy comes at you with a fucking sword.

Brendan Schaub 18:19 And they're all...

Joe Rogan 18:20 ... they gotta learn how to, like, a guy's lunging at you, literally with a ridiculous movement, 'cause he's trying to just chop you up, right? So it would be similar to how these guys move-

Brendan Schaub 18:29 And throw, yeah.

Joe Rogan 18:31 ... in those, yeah, in those demonstration videos.

Brendan Schaub 18:32 There's a time for it.

Joe Rogan 18:32 But that shit's not applicable if a guy doesn't have a sword.

Brendan Schaub 18:35 That's so old school too. It's just fucking ... I was, I was thinking about doing, this isn't sponsored or anything like that. I was looking at those, 'cause you have one in the back there, one of those pendal- what, Peloton bikes?

Joe Rogan 18:44 Yeah, Peloton bikes.

Brendan Schaub 18:44 So I can work out. So I can just wake up and do that and then do my thing.

Joe Rogan 18:47 Those are great.

Brendan Schaub 18:48 You think?

Joe Rogan 18:49 They have a whole thing. You can do a bunch of different workouts. Everything's programmed.

Brendan Schaub 18:51 You can go online? There's like online classes?

Joe Rogan 18:53 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 18:53 This isn't sponsored, by the way.

Joe Rogan 18:54 You can do it live.

Brendan Schaub 18:54 I don't- Yeah.

Joe Rogan 18:55 You do it live too.

Brendan Schaub 18:56 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 18:56 But you know what I like better? I like, uh, the Rogue Bike, that fucking assault bike. What is it called? The Echo?

Brendan Schaub 19:02 The Aerodyne?

Joe Rogan 19:03 Yeah. Jesus Christ, they made a beefed up version of one.

Brendan Schaub 19:06 You have one here?

Joe Rogan 19:06 I have one here, yeah.

Brendan Schaub 19:07 I'll see it when we get done.

Joe Rogan 19:07 I do Tabatas on it.

Brendan Schaub 19:08 I love that.

Joe Rogan 19:09 20 seconds on, 10 seconds off. Holy shit, dude.

Brendan Schaub 19:12 If I get the, the Peloton bike, that Rogue thing and a, and uh, or the Aerodyne and like a rower-

Joe Rogan 19:18 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 19:18 ... I'd be straight.

Joe Rogan 19:19 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 19:19 Do work, son.

Joe Rogan 19:20 The rower's bad. I got a rower too. Rower's badass too. I do 30 and 30 with the rower, so 30 minutes of sprinting, 30 minutes of rest, 30 minutes of sprinting, 30 minutes of rest-

Brendan Schaub 19:28 30 minutes?

Joe Rogan 19:28 Excuse me. Sec- Seconds.

Brendan Schaub 19:30 Oh, Jesus Christ, Joe.

Joe Rogan 19:31 Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ.

Brendan Schaub 19:32 What are you on, sir?

Joe Rogan 19:33 Can you imagine if you could just sprint for 30 minutes?

Brendan Schaub 19:35 (laughs) Like, what the fuck?

Joe Rogan 19:36 What kind of a viking are you?

Brendan Schaub 19:37 What the ...

Joe Rogan 19:37 Excuse me. 30 seconds.

Brendan Schaub 19:39 Dude.

Joe Rogan 19:39 So the Tabata is, uh, 20/10 and then I go, uh, from, I do like, um, it'll do eight rounds of 20/10, and then I go over and do the row machine and I'll do eight rounds of 30/30, 30 seconds on, 30 seconds off.

Brendan Schaub 19:53 Dig it.

Joe Rogan 19:53 And then I go back and do it again, and then I do it again. And if I've got the stones-

Brendan Schaub 19:57 You're exhausted.

Joe Rogan 19:57 If I got the stones, I can do three sets. I've only done-

Brendan Schaub 20:00 It's exhausting.

Joe Rogan 20:00 I've only done three sets once and I had to double up on the shroom tag.

Brendan Schaub 20:03 You felt sick.

Joe Rogan 20:04 I was beat down, man. You're just really exhausted at the end of it, but it's-

Brendan Schaub 20:08 But it's also short and your body's super intense at the time. They, they s-

Joe Rogan 20:11 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 20:11 Most people think that's the best workout you can do.

Joe Rogan 20:13 It does something to you. I guarantee you, because one of the things after doing it like three or four times, I started to, uh, feel it in my running. Still running a lot too though. But my running, my endurance in running is getting better.

Brendan Schaub 20:27 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 20:27 And I think maybe some of that might have to do with the biking just 'cause the bi- bike works out different muscles too, man.

Brendan Schaub 20:34 Your lungs too.

Joe Rogan 20:35 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 20:35 When it, when it has to adapt to that kind of capacity, moving like that.

Joe Rogan 20:38 That's not it.

Brendan Schaub 20:39 That's the beefy one? I will break that shit, Jimmy.

Joe Rogan 20:41 No, that's not it, Jamie. It's called the Rogue Echo. Echo Air or some shit.

Brendan Schaub 20:45 I've been doing, uh, the 1,000 meter test on the row. Like, I'll get done hitting mitts with my trainer then I go, "All right, 1,000 meters," and I see they, they have the records for the week.

Joe Rogan 20:54 Right.

Brendan Schaub 20:54 I try and beat the records.

Joe Rogan 20:55 And just so anybody knows, that's not a sneaky ad. I paid for all the Rogue stuff that's here. I bought it all.

Brendan Schaub 21:00 No, no, this is an ad.

Joe Rogan 21:01 I just think it's good. That's it right there.

Brendan Schaub 21:02 God dog. The thing is beefy, beefy.

Joe Rogan 21:04 Beefy as fuck. It's got girders and shit. You got a fat ass handle on a girder.

Brendan Schaub 21:08 Yeah, I need to step my game up so I don't have to leave to the gym to save time.

Joe Rogan 21:11 Dude, it's nice to be able to just do it in your house, you know? All you need is a chin-up bar and some kettle bells at home and, and you could just get something done.

Brendan Schaub 21:19 Yep, that's what I need.

Joe Rogan 21:20 'Cause sometimes, you know that thing where you have, really you have an hour before you have to leave, like, "I might be able to get to the gym and squeeze 30 minutes in."

Brendan Schaub 21:26 That's, see, that's what I've been doing.

Joe Rogan 21:27 Yeah. It's not-

Brendan Schaub 21:28 'Cause I have to wake up with my son and then I'm, like, done with him.

Joe Rogan 21:31 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 21:31 And then him, within the hour, then I can be at the studio. Here, I'm going to New York and doing this. I just wanted to do something at home.

Joe Rogan 21:36 Dude, I've become addicted to the fasted cardio.

Brendan Schaub 21:39 I used to do that before ... Remember when I started throwing up?

Joe Rogan 21:41 Yeah, but I think that's your coffee intake.

Brendan Schaub 21:43 Yeah, you're probably right. Yeah, you're right.

Joe Rogan 21:44 You talk, your coffee intake's up. What, are you to like 20 cups a day or something?

Brendan Schaub 21:47 I was at 12 to 16 cups a day.

Joe Rogan 21:49 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 21:49 And then fasting till 2:00. The doctor's like, "Let's not do that, you moron."

Joe Rogan 21:54 That's so crazy. (laughs) That's so much whatever and so much caffeine.

Brendan Schaub 21:57 It's just too much of any- Yeah.

Joe Rogan 21:58 It's too much of everything.

Brendan Schaub 21:59 Yeah, I know.

Joe Rogan 21:59 And if you're not having any food-

Brendan Schaub 22:01 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 22:01 ... then it's just getting straight in there. It's all getting absorbed.

Brendan Schaub 22:03 I'm on all these medications now. I had to get off keto.

Joe Rogan 22:07 For real?

Brendan Schaub 22:07 I'm dying, Joe. I have stage one diabetes.

Joe Rogan 22:09 What is the medications they're putting you on?

Brendan Schaub 22:11 I don't, it's some anti-acid, like super strong stuff so I can still drink my coffee.

Joe Rogan 22:15 Wow.

Brendan Schaub 22:15 It's just not a possibility.

Joe Rogan 22:16 That's so crazy. You just have to keep coffee-

Brendan Schaub 22:18 I have to. Yes, I have to.

Joe Rogan 22:19 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 22:19 I was like, "You will, you will fuck up my entire workflow if I can't drink coffee."

Joe Rogan 22:23 That's so crazy.

Brendan Schaub 22:24 Yeah. But fasting cardio is the way to go.

Joe Rogan 22:27 Yeah. I love it, man. I get addicted to it. You know what I get addicted to? I get addicted to the feeling of having done it when I didn't want to do it. That's when I realized this running thing is for me. It's this, this little game I'm playing with my brain where I know I'm gonna do it, but I wake up, I'm like, "Ugh." And then Marshall's barking, "Brrr! Brr!" Mar- Mar- I put him in the backyard and he's like, "Come on, bitch!"

Brendan Schaub 22:46 Yeah, he wants to go.

Joe Rogan 22:47 Dude, he's so crazy now.

Brendan Schaub 22:49 I love it.

Joe Rogan 22:49 Because we've been doing it so much so he's in really good shape. That fucking dog's in shape.

Brendan Schaub 22:54 Getting jacked.

Joe Rogan 22:54 That dog's getting in shape like that.

Brendan Schaub 22:56 Yes.

Joe Rogan 22:56 He was getting a little, little chubby. You know, but he was only like, he still had baby fat on him. He's only 14 months old. So when I took him, he was like nine or 10 months old when I first started taking him. I just wasn't sure if he was gonna listen or I was worried, like, what if we ran into a rattlesnake or something like that?

Brendan Schaub 23:12 That would suck.

Joe Rogan 23:14 It sucks.

Brendan Schaub 23:14 He got used to the routine.

Joe Rogan 23:15 You could get them to the hospital though. They survived. They're a lot tougher than us.

Brendan Schaub 23:18 You gotta suck it out, especially if they hit them on the nose. You gotta suck it out.

Joe Rogan 23:21 It's not real.

Brendan Schaub 23:22 That's not real. That's what I've heard, bro.

Joe Rogan 23:23 I've heard it too. It's not real.

Brendan Schaub 23:24 It's so fake, right?

Joe Rogan 23:25 I just, yeah, I just read about it.

Brendan Schaub 23:25 It's bro science.

Joe Rogan 23:26 It doesn't work. You can't really suck it out.

Brendan Schaub 23:27 But if you ... Dogs die 'cause it hits them on the nose and so, you know, it gets spread. That's what I've heard.

Joe Rogan 23:32 No, my dog's been on the nose.

Brendan Schaub 23:33 If dogs get bit on the nose, your, your dog has?

Joe Rogan 23:34 Yeah. My pit bull.

Brendan Schaub 23:35 By rattlesnake?

Joe Rogan 23:36 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 23:36 Did he die?

Joe Rogan 23:37 No, he's fine.

Brendan Schaub 23:37 He still alive?

Joe Rogan 23:38 No, he's dead now. It was a long time ago. (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 23:40 What are we doing?

Joe Rogan 23:41 It was a long time ago. I, all my dogs got bit by rattlesnakes.

Brendan Schaub 23:45 Well ...

Joe Rogan 23:45 Except the killer.

Brendan Schaub 23:46 That's what the internet says.

Joe Rogan 23:46 Except Squeaky From. She was, uh, she didn't give a fuck about snakes. She would just fuck up other dogs.

Brendan Schaub 23:52 Did her thing.

Joe Rogan 23:52 That was my prison dog. That was the dog that I got from the pound that was in the pound that was from Callen, on Callen's suggestion.

Brendan Schaub 23:58 (laughs) Yeah, putting in the county books.

Joe Rogan 23:59 He lived in the L.A. Animal Shelter for like five or six months. He was a sweet, sweet dog though. Loved people.

Brendan Schaub 24:05 Just had issues though.

Joe Rogan 24:06 Did not want any dogs ruining her newfound party.

Brendan Schaub 24:10 Dog aggression.

Joe Rogan 24:11 Well, she, she lived for the formative months of her childhood before I got her, she lived in this cage.... and I think that that fucks with a dog's head. Nobody adopted her for, like, I think it was at least five or six months.

Brendan Schaub 24:25 Poor bunny.

Joe Rogan 24:26 And then once you finally do get adopted and you get all this love from these people, you get to sleep in bed with them and shit, and they take you home, and... I mean, that dog was... She slept right by my bed. Sometimes they would hop in the bed, but I have to kick them off because they fart and shit, and it's-

Brendan Schaub 24:38 Yeah, see, I like them in the bed.

Joe Rogan 24:39 ... just rough.

Brendan Schaub 24:40 I like the dogs in the bed. Keep it warm.

Joe Rogan 24:41 Yeah. It does keep it warm, but sometimes they fart and it's brutal. You're like, "Oh, Jesus."

Brendan Schaub 24:46 Or if it's a hot summer night-

Joe Rogan 24:47 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 24:47 ... it's like, "Get out of here, man."

Joe Rogan 24:48 I know, they're itchy and shit. But, um, she... So, like, any dog that she thought might steal that from her, like any dog that came anywhere near-

Brendan Schaub 24:56 Game on.

Joe Rogan 24:57 ... she would just, she would growl at dogs if you pet them. She just was not into it. So-

Brendan Schaub 25:02 (clears throat) Insecurity issues.

Joe Rogan 25:03 Yeah. There's good and bad, though.

Brendan Schaub 25:05 But you guys are running all the time together. I've never... I've, I've struggled with that a little bit lately where I'll be tired and I'm like, "Come on, you gotta work out." I've never had to work out and then afterwards went, "Man, I wish I didn't do that." (laughs)

Joe Rogan 25:14 Yeah, well-

Brendan Schaub 25:15 Never, not once.

Joe Rogan 25:16 I mean, people are saying this to... People need to understand. Like, I saw a couple comments of people saying, "This is terrible advice and you should listen to your body when your body's tired." That's not-

Brendan Schaub 25:24 Oh, shut up.

Joe Rogan 25:24 ... that's not right.

Brendan Schaub 25:25 No.

Joe Rogan 25:25 You're not... No, I know when I'm tired.

Brendan Schaub 25:26 If you're sick, it's worth it.

Joe Rogan 25:28 Yeah, I know when I need to rest. And I also can... I know, like, how, when I've done too much stuff. Like, I've done, like, two works out, two workouts a days, three days in a row before, and then you get to that fourth day and you're like, "Whoa. All right, I probably should do nothing today." (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 25:42 Which is... That's ev- that's almost tougher to do than working out. For me to take a day off is almost tougher.

Joe Rogan 25:47 Psychologically.

Brendan Schaub 25:47 Yes.

Joe Rogan 25:48 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 25:48 'Cause I'm like, "Oh, that's not good, man."

Joe Rogan 25:49 Don't be a pussy. You don't, you got momentum.

Brendan Schaub 25:51 You're getting, you're getting lazy.

Joe Rogan 25:51 Right now, it's going good, right? Your body starts thinking it's gonna go... But there's a moment where you realize that you're probably... I should really monitor my h- resting heart rate in the morning. That's another thing Steve Maxwell taught me. He said that, that's one of the best ways to figure out if you're overtrained.

Brendan Schaub 26:05 Overtrained. We used to do that in camps, yeah.

Joe Rogan 26:06 When you wake up in the morning, m- m- if your heart rate is five to 10 beats over what it normally is, don't do shit.

Brendan Schaub 26:13 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 26:13 Because you're fighting something off. Either you're fighting something off or you need to recover. You could do, like, light skill work.

Brendan Schaub 26:18 They say if you're sick, working out makes it worse.

Joe Rogan 26:20 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 26:20 'Cause it messes up your immune system.

Joe Rogan 26:21 Yeah, it messed up your immune system.

Brendan Schaub 26:22 But it's... Yeah, usually I know if I'm being lazy, I'm like, "God-

Joe Rogan 26:24 Right.

Brendan Schaub 26:24 ... I just wanna rest in bed, man. Oh, I just wanna do this. I'd rather do this."

Joe Rogan 26:27 But you know what? If you're not too sick, if you're not too debilitated-

Brendan Schaub 26:31 Get to work.

Joe Rogan 26:31 ... it's not, it's not a bad thing to just do light-

Brendan Schaub 26:33 No, the sweat.

Joe Rogan 26:34 ... just light focus work. Just move. Like, try to figure out some technique where you're not doing anything hard.

Brendan Schaub 26:38 Or even a steam room or sauna, you know that, yeah.

Joe Rogan 26:40 Sauna, yeah. And, and someone who asked me about the steam room versus sauna, I asked Rhonda Patrick, and, uh, there's, there hasn't really been studies done on the sauna, or the steam room rather, that show the benefits of the sauna. They're both hot as shit.

Brendan Schaub 26:52 They're both hot as shit.

Joe Rogan 26:53 They're both hot as shit, probably has some benefit. The only difference is that the sauna can get way hotter 'cause it's a dry heat. So the sauna can get... You know, my sauna, I've had it up to more than 190.

Brendan Schaub 27:03 We sat-

Joe Rogan 27:03 I fucked up and had it at 200.

Brendan Schaub 27:04 We sat in that sauna in Boston, you're a serial killer in there. 10 more minutes, Joe Rogan was dying.

Joe Rogan 27:09 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 27:09 I was like, "Uh, I think I'm set, man. I think I'm kinda set. I'm all red like a lobster."

Joe Rogan 27:14 You just gotta go... You just gotta just go empty in there.

Brendan Schaub 27:17 I know. I hear ya, but I was good, man.

Joe Rogan 27:20 I know.

Brendan Schaub 27:20 Like, we were in there for, uh, a minute. Jamie dipped out super early.

Joe Rogan 27:25 Oh, I was out 10 minutes before you guys. (laughs) He was there before everybody. (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 27:27 Oh, were you?

Joe Rogan 27:27 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 27:27 I didn't know that.

Joe Rogan 27:29 He was there before me. Yeah. 'Cause mostly when you left, it went...

Brendan Schaub 27:30 Before me.

Joe Rogan 27:30 Pussy. Oh, no, I'm just kidding.

Brendan Schaub 27:32 No, no, no, Jamie got there first.

Joe Rogan 27:33 Little beast. Shout out to Equinox in Boston, great fucking gym.

Brendan Schaub 27:37 That was a good night, man.

Joe Rogan 27:38 Yeah, they keep it at 170. That's what most people think it should be, 170. But if you was 170 with steam, man, you're getting cooked in there.

Brendan Schaub 27:44 (sighs) .

Joe Rogan 27:45 That's not good. I don't think you can take that heat. So, the idea is that the sauna, because it's a dry heat for the most part... I know sometimes people throw some water on the rocks-

Brendan Schaub 27:53 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 27:53 ... but it's a dry heat for the most part, and that, that is what you want because that's what your body responds to the... Just the actual temperature and produces those heat shock proteins.

Brendan Schaub 28:02 It makes sense.

Joe Rogan 28:03 Totally makes sense.

Brendan Schaub 28:04 You know what's weird is sometimes in the UFC, and you can feel this too, if it's at a hockey arena, like T-Mobile or the... Sometimes the, when you get into the locker room and get in that crowd, it's freezing.

Joe Rogan 28:15 Right, the ice underneath the feet.

Brendan Schaub 28:15 Because there's ice underneath, it's freezing.

Joe Rogan 28:17 Yeah. That's real.

Brendan Schaub 28:18 It sucks for the fighter.

Joe Rogan 28:19 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 28:19 It takes a while to get going. You, you'll see guys for the first round and be like, "God, he looks a little stiff," or what- what's going on here? It's, it's freezing out there, man. You're just in shorts.

Joe Rogan 28:27 Right.

Brendan Schaub 28:27 You're sweating in the back.

Joe Rogan 28:28 Right.

Brendan Schaub 28:29 And it's warm in that locker room. Then when you come out, it's this, you're like, "Goddamn."

Joe Rogan 28:33 So you feel a total difference when you get in there.

Brendan Schaub 28:35 Oh, right away I'd be like, "Goddamn it."

Joe Rogan 28:36 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 28:37 I, I'd always think about it, is the hockey team there? Oh, there's ice. So I had to calculate that.

Joe Rogan 28:41 Oh.

Brendan Schaub 28:41 I'm sure folks had something else, but... (laughs)

Joe Rogan 28:42 (laughs) I, I didn't realize it until one day I saw, like, a crack in between the boards, the floorboards. And I looked down, I went, "That's fucking ice."

Brendan Schaub 28:50 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 28:50 "There's ice there right now?"

Brendan Schaub 28:51 It's scary.

Joe Rogan 28:51 And they're like, "Yeah, they keep it... They keep the ice there." They keep ice. They keep ice.

Brendan Schaub 28:55 I was gonna... Where... You're just... All these thousands of people chill on top of ice.

Joe Rogan 29:00 Well, it can't break.

Brendan Schaub 29:01 I know, I'm just saying-

Joe Rogan 29:02 And if it does...

Brendan Schaub 29:02 ... it's kinda weird.

Joe Rogan 29:03 Oh, it's definitely weird. But to me-

Brendan Schaub 29:05 But it's cold.

Joe Rogan 29:05 ... is it better... Well, not for the fighters, for sure, but is it better for the audi- 'cause it... Sometimes it gets fucking hot in those places. If you have a... just a big ass chunk of ice in the middle of everybody, that keeps you-

Brendan Schaub 29:15 It's kinda smart.

Joe Rogan 29:16 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 29:16 The on- the only time it's been super cookie is in, in Brazil.

Joe Rogan 29:19 Oh, yeah.

Brendan Schaub 29:19 They just didn't use any AC or anything.

Joe Rogan 29:21 Dude, I was in, uh, one of them in, uh, it was an open-air place in Brazil. So we were indoors, but at the top, the top areas, it's, like, these big old open doors that face the outside. There was bugs flying around and shit. (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 29:36 (laughs) That's some Brazilian shit, man.

Joe Rogan 29:38 It was warm, man. It was moist and warm.

Brendan Schaub 29:40 Where was the... It was w- uh, there's one with Anik and someone, and they're literally just sweating, the pit stains-

Joe Rogan 29:45 Oh, yeah.

Brendan Schaub 29:45 ... they're, they're sweating it out.

Joe Rogan 29:46 That happened in Abu Dhabi too. We were in Abu Dhabi, I was drenched. That was outdoors. That was an outdoor fight.

Brendan Schaub 29:52 That's right.

Joe Rogan 29:53 Yeah. Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 29:54 Who fought... Was that Munoz?

Joe Rogan 29:54 Anderson.

Brendan Schaub 29:55 Weidman?

Joe Rogan 29:56 Anderson, uh-

Brendan Schaub 29:56 No.

Joe Rogan 29:56 ... Demian Maia.

Brendan Schaub 29:57 That's right.

Joe Rogan 29:58 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 29:59 Weidman fought out there too. I forget... I think he fought...

Joe Rogan 30:01 BJ Penn fought, uh, Frankie Edgar. That's where, uh, Frankie Edgar won the title.

Brendan Schaub 30:06 ... and they, they've had Roy, Nog, or yeah, Nog out there.

Joe Rogan 30:09 Yep.

Brendan Schaub 30:10 They haven't been back there in a while.

Joe Rogan 30:11 It's been a while.

Brendan Schaub 30:12 It's been a minute, hot minute.

Joe Rogan 30:14 Yeah. That one was crazy 'cause you, you saw bugs flying around that you never knew were real.

Brendan Schaub 30:18 Oh, it's some-

Joe Rogan 30:19 Like, what-

Brendan Schaub 30:19 ... Jumanji shit out there.

Joe Rogan 30:20 What is that? (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 30:20 I went on a hike, I was like, "Oh, I'm in Jumanji. This is cool."

Joe Rogan 30:23 Like, what in the fuck is this?

Brendan Schaub 30:24 Shit you've never seen before.

Joe Rogan 30:26 Yeah. It's crazy if you go to other countries, man. They, they're whole... They have completely different ecosystems. To the point where you look at things and you go, "What in the fuck is that? What is that?"

Brendan Schaub 30:35 But where it's dangerous, too. I remember when I was in Brazil, we were climbing this thing and they go, "Now listen, fellas. You gotta make sure..." And we're with the locals, like, "You have to come down before nightfall, otherwise they're not gonna find you." What kind of shit is this? So we just dipped out, getting up there, and my man (laughs) ...

Joe Rogan 30:51 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 30:51 My manager, Lex McMahon, got lost. He, we didn't see him for the rest of the night.

Joe Rogan 30:54 Oh, no!

Brendan Schaub 30:55 And literally the local was like, "He's one with the, he's (laughs) ... He's one with the f- jungle now." I'm like, "Ho- what the fuck does that mean?"

Joe Rogan 31:02 So how did you lose him, man? Is there-

Brendan Schaub 31:02 Is this a bad Rocky movie? Is this The Rundown or some shit?

Joe Rogan 31:05 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 31:05 What do you mean he's one with the jungle?

Joe Rogan 31:08 (laughs) .

Brendan Schaub 31:08 (laughs) He just... He sh- he showed up a day later, just exhausted, didn't get an ounce of sleep, and someone in one of these huts took him under their wing and saved him.

Joe Rogan 31:18 Oh, my god.

Brendan Schaub 31:19 Yeah, and Bebop did get helicoptered out of there for if they get trapped at the top. I was like, "Dude, I feel-"

Joe Rogan 31:23 Oh, my god.

Brendan Schaub 31:23 "... like I should be doing this before a fight." I feel like this is a bad idea.

Joe Rogan 31:26 How many days before a fight was this?

Brendan Schaub 31:27 This was like a week before.

Joe Rogan 31:28 Jesus Christ! (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 31:29 The, the guy in front of us had a sun gun, basically a Speedo just asshole out-

Joe Rogan 31:33 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 31:33 ... in front of us, just fucking going. I'm like... And-

Joe Rogan 31:35 (laughs) Through the jungle with a Speedo on?

Brendan Schaub 31:37 Bare- barefoot.

Joe Rogan 31:37 Barefoot.

Brendan Schaub 31:37 And just doing work, smoking us. Shredded, tan, fucking all acai'd up.

Joe Rogan 31:43 You ever see what their feet look like?

Brendan Schaub 31:45 Like hobbit's feet, like fucking-

Joe Rogan 31:46 They have the craziest feet ever. These people that live in the forest? They splay out like a hand. And they, they have super thick toes and shit. Like, it doesn't look anything like, uh-

Brendan Schaub 31:56 No, we have bitch feet.

Joe Rogan 31:57 Yeah. Oh, dude.

Brendan Schaub 31:58 We have bitch feet.

Joe Rogan 31:58 Believe me, man. My-

Brendan Schaub 31:59 It feels good.

Joe Rogan 31:59 ... feet were sore today. I had to run in regular running shoes 'cause my feet are sore.

Brendan Schaub 32:04 From the Vibrams?

Joe Rogan 32:04 From, yeah. From the, just the pounding.

Brendan Schaub 32:06 The pounding.

Joe Rogan 32:07 And I don't... I'm scared of that plantar fasciitis. Have you ever had it?

Brendan Schaub 32:10 I don't know if you've got it.

Joe Rogan 32:10 No.

Brendan Schaub 32:11 Get your mind right. Let's go and get on the... There's a reason there's technology, son. Let's quit running barefoot these days.

Joe Rogan 32:16 No, no, no, no. I think it just... The barefoot thing strengthens your feet up.

Brendan Schaub 32:19 (sighs)

Joe Rogan 32:19 I think it just takes time. I'm just being real careful.

Brendan Schaub 32:22 Be super careful.

Joe Rogan 32:23 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 32:23 It's a nightmare.

Joe Rogan 32:24 I'm sure.

Brendan Schaub 32:25 Tom Cruise had to deal with it.

Joe Rogan 32:26 I know.

Brendan Schaub 32:26 I've dealt with it at night where I had to get shots, injections in my foot. Horrible.

Joe Rogan 32:29 And with Tom Cruise's it was the same thing. It was coming back too quickly. Like, he, he had a knee injury, right? So after his knee injury-

Brendan Schaub 32:37 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 32:37 ... then he just tried to get way back into shape way quick and fucked his feet up.

Brendan Schaub 32:40 Mine was just b-

Joe Rogan 32:41 (clears throat)

Brendan Schaub 32:41 I think from being so big and just running. I was doing, you know-

Joe Rogan 32:44 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 32:44 ... miles, and miles, and miles, and miles. 'Cause I love running. I l- It's literally my favorite thing to do.

Joe Rogan 32:48 Neil Brennan did it on a... He got plantar from a treadmill from wearing those, uh, Vibrams.

Brendan Schaub 32:53 If, if you're... They say you gotta work into 'em.

Joe Rogan 32:56 Gotta work into 'em.

Brendan Schaub 32:56 You just don't just wanna go straight barefoot and just start doing work.

Joe Rogan 32:58 Yeah. No, you definitely do. But when you do do it-

Brendan Schaub 33:00 To me, it feel, it feels good to be barefoot.

Joe Rogan 33:01 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 33:01 Like, I like walking in the street. I feel like I'm doing something dangerous. Like, on the sidewalk-

Joe Rogan 33:05 It's crazy.

Brendan Schaub 33:05 ... barefoot. Yeah, like, "Ooh, I'm wild."

Joe Rogan 33:07 Like, "Wow, man."

Brendan Schaub 33:07 Yeah, I feel nice about it.

Joe Rogan 33:09 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 33:09 I don't know what it is, man. It makes you feel free.

Joe Rogan 33:12 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 33:12 I know it's dirty and dangerous, but I don't care.

Joe Rogan 33:14 It's supposed to be dirty and dangerous. That's what life is supposed to be. You're supposed at be. You're supposed to be interacting, interacting with other life.

Brendan Schaub 33:19 With your feet.

Joe Rogan 33:19 It's also these barriers.

Brendan Schaub 33:20 At your feet.

Joe Rogan 33:21 Yeah. With the-

Brendan Schaub 33:22 Feels nice.

Joe Rogan 33:22 ... rubber barrier between you and the world. That shit ain't right.

Brendan Schaub 33:25 You're always confined. I like to let 'em breathe a little bit, man.

Joe Rogan 33:28 What if the Indians had it right with moccasins? Just like a-

Brendan Schaub 33:31 Nah, they... Nah, I think there's no airflow with those goddamn moccasins.

Joe Rogan 33:33 They didn't give a fuck what things smelled like back then, bro.

Brendan Schaub 33:35 Oh, they smelled like bullshit.

Joe Rogan 33:36 Like, they gave up on that fight. (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 33:37 (laughs) Yeah, they just didn't give a fuck. They felt like straight bullshit.

Joe Rogan 33:39 They gave up on that fight. If they could find a creek, a temporary fo- foot, put some of that fire out real quick...

Brendan Schaub 33:45 Nah, I'm not about that life.

Joe Rogan 33:46 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 33:46 I'm not, I'm not like that, man.

Joe Rogan 33:48 But they would just run around with moccasins. They basically just had like a layer of leather between their foot and the ground.

Brendan Schaub 33:54 It's all they could do.

Joe Rogan 33:55 Climb mountains with that. Hey, hey, hey! What is this, Jamie?

Brendan Schaub 33:58 (laughs) How dare you, Jamie.

Joe Rogan 33:59 This guy is slicing chunks off of the bottom of his foot. I mean, this is-

Brendan Schaub 34:03 Those are callouses?

Joe Rogan 34:03 ... crazy.

Brendan Schaub 34:04 That makes me feel sick, bro.

Joe Rogan 34:06 Man cuts callouses off his foot with a knife and dog eats it. This is the name of this video. How the fuck did you find out? Look at these callouses, dude! This is insane!

Brendan Schaub 34:14 Bro.

Joe Rogan 34:15 This guy is just slicing through these callouses like it's a coconut.

Brendan Schaub 34:19 Like it's coconut meat.

Joe Rogan 34:20 It looks like a pineapple.

Brendan Schaub 34:21 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 34:21 This is insane!

Brendan Schaub 34:22 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 34:22 Have you ever seen anybody have callouses like this before though?

Brendan Schaub 34:25 I think this guy has a problem.

Joe Rogan 34:27 Now why-

Brendan Schaub 34:27 That, that ain't normal.

Joe Rogan 34:27 What kind of a man can just cut at his foot like that?

Brendan Schaub 34:31 How do you know how, how deep to cut where you don't cut your goddamn heel off?

Joe Rogan 34:33 Yeah, I mean, he don't... You know this dude is not sharpening that knife. That's not a sharp knife.

Brendan Schaub 34:36 That's not...

Joe Rogan 34:37 Geez, this is crazy, man.

Brendan Schaub 34:39 Ugh. That guy has the worst looking feet ever. Oh!

Joe Rogan 34:40 And the dog is eating it!

Brendan Schaub 34:43 Oh!

Joe Rogan 34:43 The dog is taking the pieces of meat and eating it. That dog's a man-eater.

Brendan Schaub 34:47 Ugh.

Joe Rogan 34:47 So what in the fuck-

Brendan Schaub 34:48 Makes me feel sick.

Joe Rogan 34:48 ... is wrong with that dog?

Brendan Schaub 34:49 And how in the world-

Joe Rogan 34:50 That's 100, that's 100% dog meat.

Brendan Schaub 34:50 ... did you find that, Jamie? (laughs) What the fuck?

Joe Rogan 34:52 Yeah, he's scared of it the other day.

Brendan Schaub 34:53 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 34:53 Jamie's got that bookmarked.

Brendan Schaub 34:55 (laughs) Couldn't wait to bring... "Did you say feet?" (laughs) . Just couldn't wait to drag that shit up.

Joe Rogan 34:59 I mean, who the fuck cuts off the bottom of their feet with a knife like that?

Brendan Schaub 35:04 And what's he doing to get his feet like that?

Joe Rogan 35:06 And why is he yelling at that dog while that dog's eating his feet?

Brendan Schaub 35:09 Oh, ugh, that makes me this close to throwing up.

Joe Rogan 35:11 Wouldn't you like s- think that the dog would get used to that smell? Like, "That's what I like to eat now."

Brendan Schaub 35:14 Ugh.

Joe Rogan 35:14 And then, like, you'll be sleeping. The dog's hungry, he's like, "Fuck it, I'm just gonna snack out on this dude's feet."

Brendan Schaub 35:19 It's a zombie dog.

Joe Rogan 35:20 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 35:20 You got a zombie dog on your hands now.

Joe Rogan 35:22 Dog-

Brendan Schaub 35:22 Looks like a bloodhound too.

Joe Rogan 35:23 Dog's a goddamn horrible monster.

Brendan Schaub 35:25 Ugh, makes me feel sick.

Joe Rogan 35:27 Meat eater, human eater. Wow. Anyway.

Brendan Schaub 35:29 That makes me feel super sick, man.

Joe Rogan 35:31 On another note.

Brendan Schaub 35:33 (coughs) .

Joe Rogan 35:33 How about that Brian Ortega? (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 35:35 (laughs) . On another note, how about Brian Ortega, man? I don't... On my show yesterday night, it was awkward 'cause me and Brian are super close. And I don't know what it is because same thing with Stipe. Whenever I know these guys, it's like I know 'em from when, when I trained with 'em and I've seen 'em in that light. Like, with Brian Ortega, I'd corner him before his, uh, one of his fights before he got to the UFC, and I knew him as that Brian Ortega where all jujitsu, you know, cardio for days, but terrified to fight. Like, I know him as, as that Brian, and now he's evolved into the number one featherweight in the world. So when I, when he got the Frankie Edgar fight, I was like, "God, that's..." I just feel like it's a terrible matchup, man. I'm telling Heno, I'm like, "What, what's he gonna do?" And Heno's like, "Don't worry, man. Don't worry." And so, on my show, which Brian and Heno listen to, they're like, "Dude..." They come in, they're like, "How are you gonna pick against me?" I'm like, "No, no. I said, my brain-"... went with Frankie just because it's Frankie Edgar, he's a legend. My heart wanted you, Brian. He's like, "Dude, it hurt my feelings." I'm like, "I don't, I don't... I'm sorry, man." Like I... And I don't know what it is. It was Stipe too.

Joe Rogan 36:32 Hmm.

Brendan Schaub 36:33 Whenever I see him, I, I know him as that version of them. It's a problem that I have. I like this gap. I don't know what's going on.

Joe Rogan 36:38 Uh, people always do that. They do that. They remember someone by what they were when they were at their worst.

Brendan Schaub 36:43 It's not even their worst, but it's in their infancy-

Joe Rogan 36:45 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 36:46 ... of their, of their-

Joe Rogan 36:46 Well-

Brendan Schaub 36:46 ... of their careers.

Joe Rogan 36:47 Well, let's not even say their worst, just say a lesser version of who they are now.

Brendan Schaub 36:50 Correct.

Joe Rogan 36:51 Right? It's like, do you ever get that feeling when you go back to high school? Like, I... If I'm around someone from high school, I feel like a loser. (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 36:58 I-

Joe Rogan 36:58 You know? This is a weird feeling.

Brendan Schaub 36:59 No, 100%. When I go back-

Joe Rogan 37:00 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 37:01 ... to Denver, I'm, I'm almost not myself because I feel like this almost, yeah, almost like this-

Joe Rogan 37:05 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 37:05 ... loser.

Joe Rogan 37:06 A loser.

Brendan Schaub 37:07 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 37:07 Because, yeah. Because, you remember back who you were when you were insecure and starting out-

Brendan Schaub 37:12 Correct.

Joe Rogan 37:13 ... in life, and just... That's a normal thing, you know. They always say that about comedy clubs. Like, if you start out at a club, that club will never respect you. They respect you when you leave and, you know, maybe you get a TV show or something like that, and then come back, and they're like, "Okay, yeah, I remember when you sucked though."

Brendan Schaub 37:28 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 37:28 Like, they remember when you sucked.

Brendan Schaub 37:29 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 37:30 I always had a... I had a problem with that in Boston at first.

Brendan Schaub 37:32 Really?

Joe Rogan 37:32 Yeah, because they remembered me as this guy who was an opener. And then, you know, "How am I a headliner?"

Brendan Schaub 37:37 They treated you like that, yeah.

Joe Rogan 37:38 "Hey, you're not a headliner."

Brendan Schaub 37:38 Like, "You-"

Joe Rogan 37:38 "I remember when you were opening. You did 20 minutes."

Brendan Schaub 37:40 I know.

Joe Rogan 37:40 "You, you opened, that's what you do."

Brendan Schaub 37:42 I know.

Joe Rogan 37:42 Like, "You're not a headliner."

Brendan Schaub 37:43 I, I, I had one night in... I... This is not in my nature at all and I'm gonna go back, I've just been busy. But I had one night at The Laugh Factory where I just, I bombed, man. Bomb, bomb. Like, after, like, "I should probably not do this anymore." Just... One guy in the back just goes, "Boo!" I'm like, "No doubt, no doubt, man."

Joe Rogan 38:03 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 38:03 I get in the car and I'm just driving down Sunset and I'm like, "What the fuck am I doing, man? It's so embarrassing." I haven't been back since. But not because, because I'm like, "Oh, I'm scared of The Laugh Factory." It's just that I, I've been at the store and, and just been on the grind. But I, I-

Joe Rogan 38:17 But you do have it in your head, like, "You gotta get back up there and clean that up."

Brendan Schaub 38:19 Th- th- there's, there's a f-

Joe Rogan 38:20 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 38:20 And, and literally, it's... I think about it every day. It's something back here.

Joe Rogan 38:23 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 38:23 It's like, "Get your ass up there, man."

Joe Rogan 38:25 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 38:25 I'm like, "Oh, but I, I'll go to The Comedy Store." "Nope, get your ass up there."

Joe Rogan 38:29 See, that's an athlete's perspective. That's the difference... It's one of the things that I've been saying to people about you. The difference between the way you've been approaching comedy and another person would do it is you're doing it from an athlete's perspective. Like, you work hard as shit.

Brendan Schaub 38:40 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 38:40 And you know where your weaknesses are and you gotta... You fix those. Well, other people, like, ignore them. That's a real problem. You know, like, like someone will have a joke and the joke doesn't do well, like several nights in a row, but they keep doing it the same way. Like, why are you doing it the same way? You need to cut some of that out, you need to tweak this, you need to turn that around, you need to add something. Maybe you're not explaining it enough. But, if it's not doing well and you keep doing it the same exact way-

Brendan Schaub 39:03 Yeah, it's not the crowds, homie.

Joe Rogan 39:04 Yeah, you gotta figure out there's-

Brendan Schaub 39:06 They're there to laugh.

Joe Rogan 39:07 People get stuck in a weird pattern though, of wanting to do things the exact same way over and over again.

Brendan Schaub 39:12 Oh, dude, nothing's better to me when... It's such an honor too, if I'm at The Comedy Store or if I was at The Comedy Store in La Jolla and a comic would go, "Hey, you should try this."

Joe Rogan 39:21 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 39:21 "I listened to your joke, you should button with this." Or, "Try this." I'm like, "Dude, that's brilliant, man."

Joe Rogan 39:24 Yeah, every now and then someone will just nail it for you. They just find, they see something that maybe you didn't see and you're like, "Oh."

Brendan Schaub 39:31 Like, "You ever thought about going this direction?" I'm like, "Dude." And it's not like they're writing your jokes, like, "Hey, what if you went this direction with them?" Like that, "Dude, that's brilliant, man."

Joe Rogan 39:38 That happens in martial arts too, right? Like, hasn't someone like, pointed something out to you and you're like, "Oh, shit."

Brendan Schaub 39:43 Oh, 100% with a choker.

Joe Rogan 39:45 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, oh, yeah.

Brendan Schaub 39:45 "Your hands are like this, dude."

Joe Rogan 39:46 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 39:46 "You ever tried it like this?"

Joe Rogan 39:47 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 39:48 And you're like, "Dude, that, yeah, that makes sense." It's so much easier.

Joe Rogan 39:50 Yeah. Sometimes things don't seem they, like they would be easier, and they are, like this, that pretzel grip, this f-

Brendan Schaub 39:55 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 39:56 ... this weird grip. You're like, "Why would I grab somebody like that?" And then you do it and you're like, "Oh."

Brendan Schaub 39:59 If someone shows you. But I f- I feel like-

Joe Rogan 40:03 Whoa.

Brendan Schaub 40:03 ... in, in... Not in my... N- yeah, it feels nice.

Joe Rogan 40:05 You start feeling oh.

Brendan Schaub 40:06 Feels nice.

Joe Rogan 40:07 Oh, you ain't getting none of that, no you?

Brendan Schaub 40:09 Some Brian Ortega shit.

Joe Rogan 40:10 Man, dude, his guillotine is ridiculous. How's he grip it?

Brendan Schaub 40:13 And he's getting the... He, he's, he's... It's just a... He has all sorts of variations. Motherfucker's nice with it. He's here, you know, it's right... You know, he's here a lot of times.

Joe Rogan 40:21 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 40:21 He goes flat. He, he's so good at it. But he-

Joe Rogan 40:23 So is he like Marcelo? Like how Marcelo slides it-

Brendan Schaub 40:26 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 40:26 ... under like a blade-

Brendan Schaub 40:27 Yep.

Joe Rogan 40:27 ... and then catches it?

Brendan Schaub 40:28 A blade, yeah.

Joe Rogan 40:28 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 40:29 And he's, he's the best at the world in it.

Joe Rogan 40:30 (clears throat)

Brendan Schaub 40:30 But he also, he's getting the respect now from the crowd, because if you remember when Frankie kind of faked that shot and he got ahold of his neck, then crap-

Joe Rogan 40:38 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 40:38 ... the entire crowd goes (gasps)

Joe Rogan 40:39 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 40:40 Because now it's like, "Oh, shit."

Joe Rogan 40:41 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 40:41 They realize what he's capable of, which-

Joe Rogan 40:43 When that dude gets ahold of your neck, it's a totally different proposition. When he... What he did to Cub Swanson at the end of the first round-

Brendan Schaub 40:50 Basically he did it twice.

Joe Rogan 40:50 ... he had Cub basically out.

Brendan Schaub 40:52 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 40:52 Cub was fucked and it was just a matter of the... Time ran out, but that shit was fully locked in and Cub wasn't going anywhere.

Brendan Schaub 40:58 Dude, I got emotional yesterday when he came in the room because I haven't seen him since and I went... Right when... Not even on air, I went, "Hold on, stop there." I went, "Bro, hear me real quick, before anyone tells you this. I know you didn't title shot all that." I went, "You're the number one featherweight in the world. Remember when I cornered you for that rough and nasty fight in f- whatever, Glendale, where the fuck it was? Remember that? No, you're the number one guy in the world, Brian. Let that soak in."

Joe Rogan 41:20 Well, he's the number one contender. Max Holloway is the number one in the world.

Brendan Schaub 41:23 He's ranked number one in the world.

Joe Rogan 41:25 Right, but number one contender.

Brendan Schaub 41:26 Con- true.

Joe Rogan 41:27 Right.

Brendan Schaub 41:27 He's number one, alls I'm saying.

Joe Rogan 41:28 Right. No, he's the great-

Brendan Schaub 41:28 Max Holloway is the champ.

Joe Rogan 41:30 Yeah, but that's the number one-

Brendan Schaub 41:31 Correct.

Joe Rogan 41:31 ... until they fight.

Brendan Schaub 41:32 He's the champ.

Joe Rogan 41:32 Right.

Brendan Schaub 41:32 But he's ranked number one in the world.

Joe Rogan 41:34 I know, I, I, I-

Brendan Schaub 41:34 That, that was the message.

Joe Rogan 41:35 ... know. I no- I understand that.

Brendan Schaub 41:36 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 41:36 But that... If I was Max Holloway, I'd be going like, "Motherfucker." (slams table)

Brendan Schaub 41:40 For another good fight.

Joe Rogan 41:41 "I'm the number one-" (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 41:41 For sure. No, Max Holloway is the greatest featherweight in the world right now, but-

Joe Rogan 41:44 Yeah, they have to fight.

Brendan Schaub 41:44 ... for Max... For, for Brian Ortega to go from... It's crazy to see, man. It's nuts.

Joe Rogan 41:48 It's a very interesting fight.

Brendan Schaub 41:49 It's nuts.

Joe Rogan 41:50 Because Ortega is super dangerous standing, and on the ground he's on a totally different level than anybody else.

Brendan Schaub 41:56 They're also the same size.

Joe Rogan 41:57 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 41:57 Like, uh-

Joe Rogan 41:57 A little long and tall.

Brendan Schaub 41:58 Max Holloway usually has a big advantage with reach and size-

Joe Rogan 42:01 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 42:01 ... but now they're kind of equal.

Joe Rogan 42:02 Dude, Holloway is something special though, man. He's something special.

Brendan Schaub 42:05 Super special. That-

Joe Rogan 42:06 What he did to Aldo, what he did to Aldo was crazy.

Brendan Schaub 42:09 Twice.

Joe Rogan 42:09 Twice.

Brendan Schaub 42:10 Twice.

Joe Rogan 42:10 And the second time more emphatic. Like, like he knew what he was getting into.

Brendan Schaub 42:14 No, Max Holloway is something special, special.

Joe Rogan 42:15 Special. And it's almost like when you watch what he does, you can't appreciate it until you see it a bunch of times.... because, like, w- what he's doing is not knocking someone out with one head kick. He's not, like, catching someone with some s- unbelievable, spectacular submission. No, what he's doing is just fucking you up.

Brendan Schaub 42:34 He's out-classing everybody.

Joe Rogan 42:34 Regularly. Yeah. Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 42:35 But with technique, and he's ferocious, and then-

Joe Rogan 42:38 Technique and pace, yup.

Brendan Schaub 42:38 ... "What do you wanna do? You wanna do tech- technique? You wanna do pace? Cool."

Joe Rogan 42:41 You wanna brawl?

Brendan Schaub 42:41 "You wanna brawl? I'm gonna draw the line right here. Come brawl, see how that goes for you."

Joe Rogan 42:43 Yeah, yeah.

Brendan Schaub 42:44 And tha- that's what Brian can't fall into. And, uh, Brian will be, I'm sure, in Vegas' eyes, the underdog, which rightfully so. It's Max Holloway, the greatest featherweight in the world right now. So with Brian, he just has to be careful. Max will lure you into that brawl, and he's not gonna lose those brawls.

Joe Rogan 42:57 Mm-hmm. Yeah, he's very good at brawling, that's for damn sure, and he d- the crazy thing was the, the Lamas fight.

Brendan Schaub 43:02 Oh my God.

Joe Rogan 43:03 F- Ricardo Lamas, he was beating his ass, and then, th- he just points to the center of the schedule, he says, "Come on, man. Let's fucking throw down."

Brendan Schaub 43:08 No, he's one of my favorite fighters, man.

Joe Rogan 43:09 He just bites his mouthpiece down and is just windmilling on him.

Brendan Schaub 43:12 He can do that-

Joe Rogan 43:13 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 43:13 ... he can do technique, he can do do jujitsu-

Joe Rogan 43:15 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 43:15 ... whatever you wanna do.

Joe Rogan 43:15 Yup, whatever you wanna do.

Brendan Schaub 43:16 I... It sounds like, from what Brian told me is, they're, they're shi- aiming for that international fight week. So you have DC, Stipe-

Joe Rogan 43:23 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 43:23 ... maybe Cyborg, Amanda Nunes, and you got Brian Ortega, Max Holloway.

Joe Rogan 43:26 Well, Max just broke his foot, so what are we at right now? How many w- weeks is he out? Is he even out of his cast yet?

Brendan Schaub 43:33 Hmm.

Joe Rogan 43:33 I don't think he's out of his cast. I think he... Uh, I saw a photo of him on Instagram, it was about two weeks ago he had a cast on.

Brendan Schaub 43:38 He's on tough helping DC, right though? He- he- he's on the tough cast.

Joe Rogan 43:41 He's probably doing it on crutches or doing it, you know, standing on his cast. But, um-

Brendan Schaub 43:45 So we're in March, April-

Joe Rogan 43:46 So-

Brendan Schaub 43:46 ... May, June, eesh.

Joe Rogan 43:47 April, May, June, July. Four months. Um, a foot... A f- bone in a foot is not... It's not an easy one, 'cause you're always standing on it.

Brendan Schaub 43:56 No, and then when you get back, it's gonna take time.

Joe Rogan 43:58 Yeah, and then you're gonna be real hesitant to kick things.

Brendan Schaub 44:01 Well hey, I- I'm not the one starting the rumor of international fight week. That's what-

Joe Rogan 44:05 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 44:05 That's what, that's what Ortega's hearing. 'Cause he... They wanna do it in Hawaii.

Joe Rogan 44:08 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 44:08 Obviously, Rener and Brian wanted... They were like, "We'd love to go to Hawaii," go to his hometown and do it.

Joe Rogan 44:12 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 44:13 But, you know, there's a lot of moving pieces for UFC to get to Hawaii. They'd sell that bitch out.

Joe Rogan 44:16 Well the other thing is inside and outside, like how b- how big n- of an arena do they have that's inside?

Brendan Schaub 44:22 They have a s- well, outside they have the stadium, right? They could do the giant stadium, which would sell out.

Joe Rogan 44:26 It would sell out, but what if it rained, which it does in Hawaii all the time?

Brendan Schaub 44:30 It'll be fighting in the rain.

Joe Rogan 44:32 Wet and wild. Remember that one?

Brendan Schaub 44:33 You wouldn't watch that?

Joe Rogan 44:34 King of the Cage?

Brendan Schaub 44:34 Yeah, you wouldn't watch that rainy-

Joe Rogan 44:36 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 44:36 That rainy... I mean, it'd be a s- so weird, but-

Joe Rogan 44:39 Nah, you can't have that.

Brendan Schaub 44:39 ... it's a good wrist to have.

Joe Rogan 44:41 Yeah, it's a good wrist to have.

Brendan Schaub 44:42 Look-

Joe Rogan 44:42 Can't have it, though. You're right.

Brendan Schaub 44:43 That'll be phenomenal for Brian if they could just slip to the ground real quick. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 44:48 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 44:48 Amazing for Brian.

Joe Rogan 44:48 You know? I mean, he, uh... He has-

Brendan Schaub 44:50 Lubed up?

Joe Rogan 44:50 He has a good advantage over almost everybody at 145 when it comes to jujitsu. Like, who doesn't he have an advantage of when it comes to jujitsu at 145?

Brendan Schaub 44:59 There's no one. No one more dangerous than T-City, as far as on the ground-

Joe Rogan 45:02 Right.

Brendan Schaub 45:02 ... and, you know he-

Joe Rogan 45:03 The way he locks onto things, there's a finality to it that's-

Brendan Schaub 45:06 His strength and his-

Joe Rogan 45:07 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 45:07 ... now his belief in himself-

Joe Rogan 45:09 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 45:09 ... with it, he knows how dangerous he is. There's a... And he... It... And really, it's... He's almost, you know, i- People haven't seen what that kid's capable of either. Like we, we've seen some cool stuff, but some of his flying triangles, his flying arm bars, and his, h- his, his grips and stuff, and his guillotines, and he has a lot of cool setups that we haven't even touched on, so.

Joe Rogan 45:27 Yeah, he's, uh, e- one of the most impressive guys I've ever seen, in terms of like, when he starts locking something up, you know it's over.

Brendan Schaub 45:34 Game over.

Joe Rogan 45:34 Like, "Whoa."

Brendan Schaub 45:35 Game over.

Joe Rogan 45:36 Just super high level. Very interesting-

Brendan Schaub 45:38 But that's-

Joe Rogan 45:39 ... because he doesn't have like world championship, uh, w- you know, victories in his past, right?

Brendan Schaub 45:43 But n- no, he didn't come up through like the IBJFF whatever the hell it is-

Joe Rogan 45:47 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 45:47 ... or he didn't go to Metamorphose or anything like that. He's just this kid that grew up on the Gracie mats-

Joe Rogan 45:52 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 45:52 ... and over time was that kid who was just like, "Goddamn, he's good," and just kept with it-

Joe Rogan 45:55 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 45:55 ... kept with it, kept with it.

Joe Rogan 45:57 Yeah. Now the crazy thing is his striking's become just as deadly.

Brendan Schaub 46:01 Fluid, loose.

Joe Rogan 46:02 When you... You crack Frankie Edgar with an elbow like that and then starch him with that uppercut, that's like... He can do that to you standing now. When you're-

Brendan Schaub 46:09 Lift him off his feet.

Joe Rogan 46:10 Yeah, yeah. It was incredible.

Brendan Schaub 46:13 It was nasty.

Joe Rogan 46:13 So where's the, where's the picnic? Picnic's not standing.

Brendan Schaub 46:16 Not right now.

Joe Rogan 46:16 That's how picnicking.

Brendan Schaub 46:16 Well, f- for- for Max Holloway, he's probably looking at it going, "The picnic for me is standing 'cause he's so goddamn, you know, good at it." But y- y- you can't just say that's a huge advantage anymore after you see Ortega- 'Cause remember, he's knocked out Clay Guida with knees.

Joe Rogan 46:30 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 46:30 You know, now, after you knock out Frankie Edgar like that, you at least have to acknowledge the kid can do some stand-up damage.

Joe Rogan 46:36 I think yes, but I think there's a real concern with... If they're gonna try to fight in July, with C- Holloway not having enough time to recover... I hope I'm wrong, but when I'm looking at that, when you just said that it's March, and I was like, "Yeah, it is March, isn't it?"

Brendan Schaub 46:48 Beginning of March.

Joe Rogan 46:48 April, May, June, July. That's four months. How do they have... How, how h- healed up are you after four months? Are you ready to throw kicks and get your foot checked?

Brendan Schaub 46:58 Well who knows? May- maybe they also told... Maybe Dana told O- O- Brian, like, "Hey, we're shooting for Ma- or, we're shooting for July, summer, something like that," but they don't realize where Max Holloway... You know how this goes.

Joe Rogan 47:08 Yeah, yeah.

Brendan Schaub 47:08 Maybe it's on another card or-

Joe Rogan 47:09 Maybe... Maybe I'm wrong though. Maybe... I mean, six weeks is what it takes for a bone to heal, right?

Brendan Schaub 47:12 I'm sure Max will tweet us or something and be like, "Hey, I'm good right now, bitch."

Joe Rogan 47:15 Like, Google what it takes for a healthy... What is Max, like 28?

Brendan Schaub 47:19 No, 27.

Joe Rogan 47:20 20 sec- something.

Brendan Schaub 47:21 A- aren't he, I mean, aren't him and Brian Ortega the same age? 20... A couple young bucks.

Joe Rogan 47:24 Some... Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 47:24 And this won't be the last time you see a Brian Ortega and Max Holloway fight.

Joe Rogan 47:28 What's that?

Brendan Schaub 47:29 He's 26.

Joe Rogan 47:30 26, sorry. Nice.

Brendan Schaub 47:31 Ortega's 27.

Joe Rogan 47:32 Um, go to, uh, how long does it take... Just Google, how long does it take for a bone on a 26-year-old man to heal?

Brendan Schaub 47:42 And then cut it in half 'cause Max Holloway.

Joe Rogan 47:44 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 47:45 That's... You, you know how the doctors... "You're gonna be out about six months."

Joe Rogan 47:47 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 47:48 "I'm like, "Yes, if I'm a soccer mom, six months. For me, it's gonna be about three. Thank you sir."

Joe Rogan 47:52 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 47:52 "I'ma push it at three, you giant pussy."

Joe Rogan 47:54 (laughs) That's also a way to blow out those ACL reconstructions.

Brendan Schaub 47:58 That's how doctors are. They used to-

Joe Rogan 47:59 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 47:59 ... all these old people, like, "You're out for about a year."

Joe Rogan 48:02 That's true.

Brendan Schaub 48:02 "Give me three months, Doc. Kick rocks."

Joe Rogan 48:04 You know what, man? This uh, tendon engine- injury that I got, I got golfer's elbow, that really made me, um, aware there's a difference between injuring a muscle and injuring a tendon.

Brendan Schaub 48:14 100%.

Joe Rogan 48:15 They don't have much blood supply, man. It's a fucking-

Brendan Schaub 48:17 Take forever.

Joe Rogan 48:18 ... pain in the dick to get that to heal.

Brendan Schaub 48:20 Yup.

Joe Rogan 48:20 I'm stunned at how long it takes. At how many different things I've done, PRP and all kinds of shit.

Brendan Schaub 48:24 When... Since you told me that, I was, I was doing pull-ups and it started hurting here. I've stopped doing 'em for a little bit 'cause I don't wanna-

Joe Rogan 48:29 Well for me, it's just here. It's just this elbow.

Brendan Schaub 48:30 Mine started hurting in there, and the- it's went to here now. I'm like, "You know, I'm gonna chill out on that stuff."

Joe Rogan 48:34 I got a chunk of something floating around in there too.

Brendan Schaub 48:37 Yeah like, uh, the-

Joe Rogan 48:38 Piece of hard something or another.

Brendan Schaub 48:39 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 48:40 I fell once in Alaska. Calen and I were on this, uh, deer hunting trip and I slipped off the side of a cliff (laughs) and cracked my elbow on this rock and it was hurting for months afterwards. Like, every time I would do a chin-up, it would hurt, and I just sucked it up. And I think I might've chipped a piece of bone off in there.

Brendan Schaub 48:58 The, the-

Joe Rogan 48:58 I think there's something floating or it's a piece of calcium that's built up because of, uh, irritation that can happen too.

Brendan Schaub 49:04 Just let it ride, bro.

Joe Rogan 49:05 Yeah, let it ride, bro.

Brendan Schaub 49:06 You got this, man. Bro science.

Joe Rogan 49:08 Got this, bro.

Brendan Schaub 49:08 Dude, speaking of people getting fucked up, how about that girl Cyborg fight?

Joe Rogan 49:13 (inhales deeply)

Brendan Schaub 49:13 She looked scared. When she got hit with the first one-

Joe Rogan 49:15 Oh, yeah.

Brendan Schaub 49:15 ... her eyes were like, "Oh my God." And God bless her, man, because your first fight in UFC, here you go. This, this is what you always wanted. Here's Cyborg main event, short notice. Enjoy that.

Joe Rogan 49:25 Yeah, that's kind of a crazy thing to do, right?

Brendan Schaub 49:28 Title shot, your first fight ever in the UFC.

Joe Rogan 49:30 Title shot and first fight ever. Nobody knows... Literally nobody in the UFC knows who you are.

Brendan Schaub 49:34 UFC didn't even have a picture up of her till the-

Joe Rogan 49:36 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 49:36 ... week of the fight.

Joe Rogan 49:38 You've never... Uh, I mean, she got submitted by Tonya Evinger.

Brendan Schaub 49:42 (smacks lips) That's tough.

Joe Rogan 49:42 She submitted Tonya and then Tonya submitted her. And we know that she's a 135-er. Yeah, that's her, like, wincing in pain as Cyborg lowers the boom arm.

Brendan Schaub 49:51 She took Cyborg down though.

Joe Rogan 49:52 She did.

Brendan Schaub 49:52 That weird...

Joe Rogan 49:53 Yeah, well the... That was obviously-

Brendan Schaub 49:55 Ankle pick.

Joe Rogan 49:56 ... a strategy. The strategy was to close the distance, get that clinch, drag Cyborg to the ground. She's a 135-er man. She really is not big enough.

Brendan Schaub 50:04 But for Cyborg, it's like, "What do you want me to do, man?" Like, there's no one in the division.

Joe Rogan 50:08 What is, uh, stopping that Megan Anderson chick from coming over?

Brendan Schaub 50:11 Her work visa.

Joe Rogan 50:12 What, she doesn't have it?

Brendan Schaub 50:14 She, she, she was here i- she was here illegally or something like that. I know that was the holdup there.

Joe Rogan 50:17 Oh.

Brendan Schaub 50:17 Some bullshit.

Joe Rogan 50:18 Lawyers get on that.

Brendan Schaub 50:19 'Cause I know, man. Let's go.

Joe Rogan 50:21 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 50:21 'Cause she, she's a legit, you know-

Joe Rogan 50:23 Competitor.

Brendan Schaub 50:24 ... competitor. Big girl, pretty-

Joe Rogan 50:25 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 50:25 ... Australian.

Joe Rogan 50:26 Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 50:26 Can fight her ass off.

Joe Rogan 50:27 Tattooed up.

Brendan Schaub 50:28 She's actually a one... You know, she's in the same weight class. She's not getting called up-

Joe Rogan 50:30 She's a legit 145-er.

Brendan Schaub 50:31 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 50:32 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 50:33 And she wants-

Joe Rogan 50:34 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 50:34 ... to fight. You know for C- Cat Zingano wanted to fight too. She's talking all that shit for-

Joe Rogan 50:36 Can't someone call Trump and get it done?

Brendan Schaub 50:39 Cat Zingano wants to fight?

Joe Rogan 50:40 Well, well, Cat Zingano did want the Cyborg fight but since she lost that last one to-

Brendan Schaub 50:44 Right.

Joe Rogan 50:44 ... to Vieira. To Catlin Vieira?

Brendan Schaub 50:45 Yeah. Split decision. You ain't getting... Cyborg's not sniffing that.

Joe Rogan 50:48 No, no, no, no, no, no. There's no way. She's gonna have to get a couple of it 'cause she lost her last one too.

Brendan Schaub 50:54 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 50:54 Who she lose to?

Brendan Schaub 50:54 She took-

Joe Rogan 50:55 Julianna Pena?

Brendan Schaub 50:56 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 50:56 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 50:56 And she, she took... She's taking too much. You could see the ring rust was there and the nerves were there. She just-

Joe Rogan 51:00 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 51:00 ... she, she needs time. She needs time-

Joe Rogan 51:02 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 51:02 ... so she can compete there. With Cyborg, I, I, and I'm not even trying to be funny here. She's not gonna lose to a single woman. You need to... She needs to fight two women or there needs to be a dude in there. But one girl's-

Joe Rogan 51:12 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 51:12 ... not gonna beat her. I hate to tell you guys. Like, it's just not... I, I don't know how you're gonna market that. You're telling me you wouldn't watch her over CM Punk?

Joe Rogan 51:19 Well, I think you put her as co-main event a lot on some cards that have a lot of great fights. I just think that the problem is-

Brendan Schaub 51:27 Oh, I'll watch her.

Joe Rogan 51:27 You... People are-

Brendan Schaub 51:27 I'll always watch her fight.

Joe Rogan 51:28 ... always gonna be willing to watch whoever steps in and fights her. But to have her be the center of a giant event, I think it's gonna take a real challenger and that's-

Brendan Schaub 51:35 Like Holly.

Joe Rogan 51:36 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 51:36 Those ratings were good.

Joe Rogan 51:37 Like, yeah, that was a good fight 'cause that was a fight where people were like, "Hmm, Holly, you know, is legit. Like, real skillful boxer."

Brendan Schaub 51:43 It shows you how good Holly is too-

Joe Rogan 51:44 Real skillful boxer.

Brendan Schaub 51:44 ... 'cause it went to decision.

Joe Rogan 51:45 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 51:45 Although she... You know, Holly was never really winning that fight. She probably maybe won-

Joe Rogan 51:49 She, she took some hard shots, but-

Brendan Schaub 51:50 ... one round. Yeah, she got lit up.

Joe Rogan 51:51 You realize when you're in there fighting Cyborg, it's a totally different proposition.

Brendan Schaub 51:54 When you... When you see-

Joe Rogan 51:55 Different kind of human.

Brendan Schaub 51:55 ... Cyborg, you're just like, "Oh man, she's never gonna lose until Father Time, I guess, touches her on the shoulder." But right now-

Joe Rogan 52:01 She's, she's only 32.

Brendan Schaub 52:03 That ain't nothing, gentlemen.

Joe Rogan 52:03 Isn't that crazy? It's not young but it's not old either.

Brendan Schaub 52:06 No, she's not old.

Joe Rogan 52:07 D- that's prime.

Brendan Schaub 52:08 She could... She could do this for another five years.

Joe Rogan 52:09 Easy. When, you know, you think about how long she's been around, like way back to the Gino Carano fight, how old was she then?

Brendan Schaub 52:16 Jesus, man. Super young.

Joe Rogan 52:18 Super young.

Brendan Schaub 52:19 She's been doing it for a minute.

Joe Rogan 52:20 Dude, you ever watch that fight again?

Brendan Schaub 52:22 It's not a bad fight.

Joe Rogan 52:23 It's not a bad fight.

Brendan Schaub 52:23 People don't give Gina enough credit.

Joe Rogan 52:24 No. Gina mounted her at one point in time.

Brendan Schaub 52:26 Gina, first team, all diet beast, captain of the team.

Joe Rogan 52:28 Yeah, she's pretty hot. But out of respect to Kevin Ross, this will be the end of this conversation when it comes to how hot Gina Carano is.

Brendan Schaub 52:34 Oh, is that her? Is that, is that her, man?

Joe Rogan 52:36 Yeah. Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 52:36 What's he do?

Joe Rogan 52:37 Kevin Ross did a Muay Thai fighter.

Brendan Schaub 52:39 Oh, yeah. With all... He's all tatted up.

Joe Rogan 52:40 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 52:40 They're still together?

Joe Rogan 52:41 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 52:41 Good for them, man.

Joe Rogan 52:42 Good for them.

Brendan Schaub 52:43 Good for them. Hopefully she's getting pulls too.

Joe Rogan 52:45 Oh, here, here's the fight. Yeah, she's, she's got to be very cool 'cause he's very cool. Damn.

Brendan Schaub 52:49 They're... Yeah, they're both great.

Joe Rogan 52:49 Look at this, the beginning of fight. She's just teeing off on Gina.

Brendan Schaub 52:51 Good. Oh, terrible takedown.

Joe Rogan 52:52 She takes her down and fucks up and Gina winds up on top of her.

Brendan Schaub 52:55 Look at Gina doing work. People forget how good that girl was, man.

Joe Rogan 52:59 Oh, she's very good. Look at the... Cyborg going for the heel hook.

Brendan Schaub 53:01 Every girl should give her royalties for starting women's MMA, let's be real.

Joe Rogan 53:04 She actually had a half-assed heel hook here, or a half-decent heel hook here.

Brendan Schaub 53:08 Gina turning, getting out of it.

Joe Rogan 53:10 Yeah, she popped out.

Brendan Schaub 53:11 Yeah, Gina Carano got... I mean, she just... Think how big Gina Carano would be if she was in the sport right now.

Joe Rogan 53:16 Oh, Jesus. Cyborg's hitting her with some hammers. This was, uh... Yeah, she would be gigantic.

Brendan Schaub 53:22 She'd be so big.

Joe Rogan 53:23 'Cause she was-

Brendan Schaub 53:23 Stand-up artist.

Joe Rogan 53:24 ... big when the UFC was really in its infancy. I wonder-

Brendan Schaub 53:28 She's big on Showtime.

Joe Rogan 53:29 What year do you think this fight was if you had to guess?

Brendan Schaub 53:32 2004? 6.

Joe Rogan 53:35 9.

Brendan Schaub 53:35 2009.

Joe Rogan 53:36 9? Yeah. Really? Yeah. 9. Wow. Cyborg, vicious kick to the body. So Cyborg was only like, what, 22-ish?

Brendan Schaub 53:44 Her takedowns are so bad there.

Joe Rogan 53:44 She fell down again and this time, Gina mounts her. Look at that. Like, people forget.

Brendan Schaub 53:48 Gina's getting the mount because of Cyborg's mistakes in these takedowns.

Joe Rogan 53:51 Yeah, it's great but she's still mounting her.

Brendan Schaub 53:52 But, hell yeah.

Joe Rogan 53:53 She's got to be crazy.

Brendan Schaub 53:53 This is the most trouble we've ever seen Cyborg in besides that Muay Thai fight.

Joe Rogan 53:56 And Gina's gonna let her up.

Brendan Schaub 53:59 No, Gina was an absolute monster. People forget, man. But with Cyborg, I, I, I'm dead serious. I'm not even trying to be funny.

Joe Rogan 54:05 She's nailing her head back too.

Brendan Schaub 54:05 Unless two women enter that octagon against her, she's not gonna lose.

Joe Rogan 54:08 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 54:08 Or you need to get Khabib up in that bitch.

Joe Rogan 54:11 Well, she obviously has some physical attributes. Now, when you think about the rest of the women at 145, no one stands out. What they're gonna do as Amanda Nunes.

Brendan Schaub 54:21 That's the fight.

Joe Rogan 54:22 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 54:23 Amanda Nunes wants it, Cyborg wants it. The, the... I like the fight and I think technically Amanda Nunes is better as far as a technician as Cyborg. However, for, let's say that's five rounds, even three rounds. Over those three rounds, she's n- she... I don't think she possesses the same power as Cyborg. You know what I'm saying?

Joe Rogan 54:42 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 54:43 That when Cyborg hits a girl-

Joe Rogan 54:44 Dude.

Brendan Schaub 54:44 ... you, you see it on their face.

Joe Rogan 54:46 The stoppage of Gina Carano we're watching on the big screen, it's horrific.

Brendan Schaub 54:49 Yeah, it's a tough one.

Joe Rogan 54:50 It's horrific. When she gets her down, like the hammers that she drops on her.

Brendan Schaub 54:54 I was more of a Cyborg fan. I'm more of a Cyborg fan now. Back then I was first team all Gina.No one wanted that.

Joe Rogan 55:02 No one wanted that. Did she test positive for this fight?

Brendan Schaub 55:06 Uh, no, I thought it was after this.

Joe Rogan 55:08 It was another fight, right?

Brendan Schaub 55:09 Yeah, it wasn't this fight. That'd be way bigger news. But, um, Cyborg Amanda is a good fight.

Joe Rogan 55:14 That's a really good fight.

Brendan Schaub 55:15 I- I just ... And I'm a huge Amanda Nunes fan. I just think over that time, she's gonna land some shots on Cyborg. Cyborg get hit, but when Cyborg hits you, it's just ... You can't play that game with her. There's, there's no female in the world who can play that game with her. "You give me one, I'll take one. You, here. You, here." It just doesn't work.

Joe Rogan 55:32 Yeah. Who knows, man? That's interesting.

Brendan Schaub 55:35 It's a great fight, though.

Joe Rogan 55:36 I like that fight.

Brendan Schaub 55:36 I love that fight.

Joe Rogan 55:36 Amanda's got legit one-punch power. Legit smack-'em-up power. Real black belt in jujitsu. Very good at fighting, knows how to fight. Like-

Brendan Schaub 55:45 Phenomenal fighter.

Joe Rogan 55:46 Yeah, she knows how to fight. Forget about all the things that she can do, she puts it together well.

Brendan Schaub 55:50 You know who can fight?

Joe Rogan 55:51 Cyborg.

Brendan Schaub 55:51 Cyborg.

Joe Rogan 55:52 Yep.

Brendan Schaub 55:53 She's the greatest female fighter of all time.

Joe Rogan 55:55 It's hard to argue.

Brendan Schaub 55:56 It's hard to argue, right?

Joe Rogan 55:57 Yeah, it's hard to argue. There's some caveats in there, obviously. But it's hard to argue.

Brendan Schaub 56:02 I mean, like, yeah. Yeah, there's some caveats, I guess, if you wanna go down that road. But still, in the UFC with the USADA testing, she's still the best.

Joe Rogan 56:09 (laughs) Uh, yeah.

Brendan Schaub 56:09 So that kind of takes it out of the window. We go, "Well, she was the best back then when she tested hot." Cool, now she's in the stricting- the most strict testing pool of all time, she's still dominating. So where's your argument there now?

Joe Rogan 56:19 Well, you know the argument.

Brendan Schaub 56:21 That she retained all the shit from when she was taking it back in the day?

Joe Rogan 56:24 You definitely retain something.

Brendan Schaub 56:26 Um, not everything, though. Ask Hector Lombard.

Joe Rogan 56:28 It's a question.

Brendan Schaub 56:29 Ask Vitor Belfort.

Joe Rogan 56:30 Right, that's true, but tha- those are men. It's different. The idea of, you know, a guy taking shit or a girl taking it, don't you think they're different?

Brendan Schaub 56:39 It's- it's different, but it's also ... It's different and there's argument there, but it's not different to the point where after t- Was that 2009 you said? So it's a- so after nine years, she's still retaining this muscle mass. And she was born a bigger female.

Joe Rogan 56:52 That's true, too. That's true, too. Like, no matter what Gabi Garcia did, she's still 6'4".

Brendan Schaub 56:57 Correct, she's still a giant.

Joe Rogan 56:58 Dude, she was at the UFC and I was like, "Holy shit."

Brendan Schaub 57:01 You're scared.

Joe Rogan 57:02 Terrifying. She's way too big.

Brendan Schaub 57:03 For- I'm terrified of all of them.

Joe Rogan 57:05 She's giant. She's so big.

Brendan Schaub 57:06 Dude, she- she wa- she wasn't s- sitting like a lady, so it's- security had to come behind you in DC and stand in front of her.

Joe Rogan 57:12 Yeah. She can't sit like a lady.

Brendan Schaub 57:14 Could.

Joe Rogan 57:14 She's got hulk legs.

Brendan Schaub 57:15 She might. Maybe not wear a dress, though.

Joe Rogan 57:16 How the f- how the fuck is she s- crossing those legs, bro?

Brendan Schaub 57:19 I ... It's too much stuff.

Joe Rogan 57:21 They're s- they're so big.

Brendan Schaub 57:23 Yeah, some thickies.

Joe Rogan 57:23 She's like ... If you have, like, one of them super tank CrossFit squat girls, those giant legs-

Brendan Schaub 57:29 With the broad ass and the quads in the front.

Joe Rogan 57:31 Yeah, can- can they even cross their legs?

Brendan Schaub 57:33 I'm sure.

Joe Rogan 57:33 How could they cross their legs?

Brendan Schaub 57:34 You can cross your legs. You have some thick-ass legs.

Joe Rogan 57:36 Barely.

Brendan Schaub 57:36 I cross my legs and it's comfortable.

Joe Rogan 57:38 Yeah, if they were long, right?

Brendan Schaub 57:38 And I got a, I got a pterodactyl dick in between.

Joe Rogan 57:40 I got a tween. (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 57:43 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 57:43 Dude, I don't think pterodactyls have big dicks. You might wanna change that one up. It's a bird.

Brendan Schaub 57:46 Well, they have tails.

Joe Rogan 57:47 (laughs) Yeah. It's- it's-

Brendan Schaub 57:48 Do they? (laughs)

Joe Rogan 57:49 I don't know.

Brendan Schaub 57:49 They're a bird. They are a bird. They're not a dinosaur.

Joe Rogan 57:52 Well, they're not a dinosaur, yeah. Did you know that? They're in a class of themselves.

Brendan Schaub 57:55 Yeah, someone ti- was telling me that.

Joe Rogan 57:57 My kid told me that.

Brendan Schaub 57:58 Oh, that's right. That's why-

Joe Rogan 57:59 My fucking seven-year-old. See this- this where right here, this is uncomfortable as fuck.

Brendan Schaub 58:02 Oh, I'm so comfy.

Joe Rogan 58:04 This is a nut cruncher for me.

Brendan Schaub 58:05 That's, "I'm so comfortable."

Joe Rogan 58:06 Yeah, but you got an extra foot of leg. (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 58:08 Yeah, there's a lot of room here.

Joe Rogan 58:10 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 58:10 But with g- with Gabi Garcia, remember when she was like, like big bloated girl and she got shred city?

Joe Rogan 58:16 Yeah, shred city for a while.

Brendan Schaub 58:17 All natural?

Joe Rogan 58:17 Oh, totally natural.

Brendan Schaub 58:18 Shred city.

Joe Rogan 58:19 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 58:19 And then she backed to in between.

Joe Rogan 58:20 She's back to giant again. I think Japan-

Brendan Schaub 58:22 Why not try and cut to 45?

Joe Rogan 58:24 W- what are you talking about? 45?

Brendan Schaub 58:26 Shred-

Joe Rogan 58:26 Dude, she's 6'4".

Brendan Schaub 58:27 ... City.

Joe Rogan 58:28 Do you know she's 6'4"?

Brendan Schaub 58:30 Wanna be in the UFC or not?

Joe Rogan 58:31 (laughs) She can't make 45.

Brendan Schaub 58:32 What are you gonna do?

Joe Rogan 58:33 And she's good friends.

Brendan Schaub 58:34 Cyborg cut from 70 to make it.

Joe Rogan 58:35 She's good friends with Cyborg, too. Look how big. Look at she- what she was-

Brendan Schaub 58:39 Holy sh-

Joe Rogan 58:39 ... when she got small and how big she is now.

Brendan Schaub 58:42 ... shit. Dude, she was hot when she was small.

Joe Rogan 58:44 She wasn't bad.

Brendan Schaub 58:44 Kallen Bola.

Joe Rogan 58:45 That's what I saw, that's what I saw in the air. Like, look at that.

Brendan Schaub 58:49 Oh.

Joe Rogan 58:49 That's when she was on The ul- Ultimate Fighter with Wanderlei.

Brendan Schaub 58:51 I wonder where she's at mentally when she sees herself. Like, does she dig that? Like, that's her thing?

Joe Rogan 58:55 She's just-

Brendan Schaub 58:55 'Cause a lot of dudes are into that.

Joe Rogan 58:56 She can't go online. Look at those thighs of her.

Brendan Schaub 59:00 Like, I- I don't ... She can't go online. Like, I had a- I had a friend who was a female bodybuilder. Thick, thicker than a Snickers. Definitely Deca, Gold's Gym just in her ass.

Joe Rogan 59:06 Just bang.

Brendan Schaub 59:07 Yeah, just protein powder-

Joe Rogan 59:08 (makes creaking sound)

Brendan Schaub 59:09 ... seeping out of her goddamn eyes.

Joe Rogan 59:10 Get that pink one above it to the right. Above, above and to the right. Okay.

Brendan Schaub 59:15 He's not mad