JRE MMA Show #43 with Brendan Schaub

Brendan Schaub 0:00 Still no main event for Madison Square Garden.

Joe Rogan 0:01 I know. Four, three, two, one.

Brendan Schaub 0:07 (sighs) (hands clap)

Joe Rogan 0:07 Booyah. Yeah, no main event for Madison Square Garden so far. The rumors were Jon Jones and Gustafsson, but I don't know.

Brendan Schaub 0:15 I don't know.

Joe Rogan 0:16 I don't know why that hasn't materialized.

Brendan Schaub 0:18 Are they just waiting to announce it till after the whole Conor-Khabib thing?

Joe Rogan 0:22 Why would they do that? I think if they announce something, it's gotta be this weekend. I mean, we're ... What is it, November 3rd or something?

Brendan Schaub 0:28 It's soon.

Joe Rogan 0:29 So it's a month.

Brendan Schaub 0:30 It's super soon. Month.

Joe Rogan 0:30 Literally a month. Today's the 3rd, right? 2nd? Today's the 2nd.

Brendan Schaub 0:35 Today's the 2nd.

Joe Rogan 0:36 Yeah. Fuck, man. That ain't good.

Brendan Schaub 0:39 I th- ... Yeah. Maybe they just don't wanna steal any shine from the Conor-Khabib fight.

Joe Rogan 0:44 (sighs) I don't think so.

Brendan Schaub 0:45 I don't know, man.

Joe Rogan 0:45 I think they just don't have a card yet.

Brendan Schaub 0:47 I think they, they were banking on Jones to-

Joe Rogan 0:50 Right.

Brendan Schaub 0:50 ... fill that main event, but it, it's been tricky to fill that slot. But also, why not have ... If, if, if you're gonna do this, why not announce Nate Diaz, Dustin Poirier as your main event? That's a great main event. I can ride with that.

Joe Rogan 1:03 But why the main event though?

Brendan Schaub 1:03 Why not do that and then advent- ... then announce Jon Jones and Gustafsson or Jon Jones and Cain if you want to?

Joe Rogan 1:09 But the main event is to be announced versus to be determined.

Brendan Schaub 1:12 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 1:12 (laughs) That's the weirdest main event I've ever seen.

Brendan Schaub 1:15 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 1:15 I've never seen a fucking pay-per-view, um, a month out that says, "To be announced," versus, "To be determined," in the main event.

Jamie Vernon 1:22 Does that mean they have somebody booked and then they're not an opponent for them and they're not even announcing it?

Brendan Schaub 1:27 Ooh.

Jamie Vernon 1:27 Or they're just, like, decided to just be funny and write both verses?

Joe Rogan 1:30 That's a very good point, Jamie.

Brendan Schaub 1:30 That's a good point, Jamie.

Jamie Vernon 1:31 That's a very good point.

Brendan Schaub 1:32 I would say they have no idea.

Joe Rogan 1:33 I think you just nailed it.

Jamie Vernon 1:34 Maybe.

Joe Rogan 1:34 I think they have a guy that they want to fight another guy. I'd heard, uh ... Actually, I heard from you. (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 1:42 (laughs) Damn, bro. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 1:44 That they were trying to do Jon Jones versus Cain.

Brendan Schaub 1:47 That was the rumor mill that I got-

Joe Rogan 1:49 Oh.

Brendan Schaub 1:49 A little birdie told me.

Joe Rogan 1:50 Yeah, that would be ... I, I'm all over that.

Brendan Schaub 1:52 I would be all over that.

Joe Rogan 1:54 I'd be all over that.

Brendan Schaub 1:54 This card's actually better than this weekend's card.

Joe Rogan 1:57 Stylebender's fighting Derek Brunson. That's the sleeper.

Brendan Schaub 2:00 That's a great fight.

Joe Rogan 2:00 That's the sleeper on that card right there.

Brendan Schaub 2:02 We got Luke Rockhold/Chris Weidman too.

Joe Rogan 2:04 Ooh, that's a good fight too.

Brendan Schaub 2:07 Jaquaré David Branch ain't f-

Joe Rogan 2:08 I forgot about that.

Brendan Schaub 2:08 ... ain't t- ... Where is Rockhold/Weidman on there?

Joe Rogan 2:11 ... terrible either.

Brendan Schaub 2:11 They're at the bottom middle.

Joe Rogan 2:12 What?

Jamie Vernon 2:13 They're not, they're not in order yet.

Joe Rogan 2:15 Oh.

Brendan Schaub 2:15 No.

Joe Rogan 2:15 What? What are they doing?

Brendan Schaub 2:16 This thing's all over the place.

Joe Rogan 2:17 Is it a puzzle? (laughs)

Jamie Vernon 2:19 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 2:19 The guy who runs the UFC website took the month off.

Joe Rogan 2:22 Rockhold versus Weidman, very interesting. That ... Listen, Gegard Mousasi was the ... That guy is the fucking sleeper of the 185-pound division. The fact that he went over to Bellator, very fucking fascinating to me. He just wrecked Rory MacDonald.

Brendan Schaub 2:38 Completely wrecked him.

Joe Rogan 2:39 Rory-

Brendan Schaub 2:39 It was tough to watch.

Joe Rogan 2:40 Rory should not be fighting at 185 pounds.

Brendan Schaub 2:42 No.

Joe Rogan 2:43 Especially against a guy who's fought at 205. He's held titles at 205.

Brendan Schaub 2:46 Agree, and especially a guy in Gegard Mousasi who's just as talented, just as skilled. So when, when you go s-

Joe Rogan 2:52 Might be better.

Brendan Schaub 2:53 Might be better in some other aspects.

Joe Rogan 2:54 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 2:54 Then when you go skill for skill, then size comes into play. And you saw how that pans out. It was-

Joe Rogan 2:59 Bert Kreischer says Mousasi has a giant dick.

Brendan Schaub 3:02 How would he know?

Joe Rogan 3:02 He was in the sauna next to him.

Brendan Schaub 3:04 Oh, that makes sense though. You know what?

Joe Rogan 3:06 He's a giant hog.

Brendan Schaub 3:06 Mousasi has that big dick energy.

Joe Rogan 3:08 (laughs)

Jamie Vernon 3:08 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 3:09 He ... Like, he, he just carries himself like a straight badass, doesn't he?

Joe Rogan 3:13 He does.

Brendan Schaub 3:14 Like, he ... Nothing really gets him going. Y- you know why? Because he has a giant dick.

Joe Rogan 3:17 Giant dick.

Brendan Schaub 3:18 You know what? Bert's, Bert's probably right on this.

Joe Rogan 3:20 Makes sense.

Brendan Schaub 3:21 God, this makes sense.

Joe Rogan 3:23 (laughs)

Jamie Vernon 3:23 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 3:23 You're brilliant, Bert Kreischer.

Joe Rogan 3:25 Well, he saw it. I mean, it's not, not even like you figured it out. I mean, he, he's got, like, eyewitness.

Brendan Schaub 3:30 (laughs) He's seen that thing.

Joe Rogan 3:32 He was there. He was in the room.

Brendan Schaub 3:33 That ... Uh, nothing's ever made more sense than that.

Joe Rogan 3:35 He's a hot seat or box with a big old sweaty dick.

Brendan Schaub 3:38 Dude, that Gegard Amsterdam dick.

Joe Rogan 3:42 (laughs)

Jamie Vernon 3:42 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 3:42 Everyone's like, "How come he doesn't get more emotional?"

Joe Rogan 3:44 I know.

Brendan Schaub 3:44 Because he has the fattest dick in the world.

Joe Rogan 3:46 D- d- ... He swore it was bigger than his fucking water bottle.

Brendan Schaub 3:48 Oh, I believe that.

Joe Rogan 3:49 I go, "Fatter? Fatter than your water bottle?"

Jamie Vernon 3:51 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 3:51 He goes, "Dude, I'm telling you. It was giant." I'm like, "Wow. All right."

Brendan Schaub 3:56 That makes sense, man.

Joe Rogan 3:57 It does make a lot of sense.

Brendan Schaub 3:58 Yeah, but Gegard Mousasi ... Now, now Bellator has an interesting kind of predicament because they have that welterweight tournament going on.

Joe Rogan 4:04 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 4:04 Now you have your champ who's gonna enter the tournament as the title holder. In the first round, he's supposed to fight Jon Fitch, who isn't an easy fight, but he's just coming off a loss and got destroyed. And also, it looks like he had some nose damage-

Joe Rogan 4:16 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 4:16 ... which was his issue before.

Joe Rogan 4:18 Yeah, his nose had been fucked up for a long time. And i- i- ... You know, he decided to take a whole year off just to try to fix his nose, just to try to let it heal.

Brendan Schaub 4:27 That's serious.

Joe Rogan 4:28 Yeah. A whole year off. I mean, think about it, that was, like, part of the delay in his initial fight in Bellator.

Brendan Schaub 4:35 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 4:35 Was that he left the UFC, you know, his, his nose got smashed in the Robbie Lawler fight. I mean, that was hard to watch. Remember when he was in agony on the ground because his nose was just shattered?

Brendan Schaub 4:44 Yeah, he said every time he'd get hit, it'd just go white like sparks. He couldn't see anything.

Joe Rogan 4:47 Oof, it was a bad injury, man.

Brendan Schaub 4:49 And they said, they, he said-

Joe Rogan 4:50 So, hey, there it is.

Brendan Schaub 4:51 There it is. One of the best fights of all time, by the way.

Joe Rogan 4:53 One of the great fights.

Brendan Schaub 4:54 One of the greatest fights.

Joe Rogan 4:54 For sure.

Brendan Schaub 4:55 He earned that shit.

Joe Rogan 4:55 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 4:56 But now, uh, with Rory, you know, what, what's sad too, and I ... It's happened to me, it's happened to some other fighters, I'm sure. But Rory goes, "I just didn't get a ... I just didn't feel like fighting. I did- ... I wasn't in, wa- wasn't in the zone. Just didn't feel like fighting Gegard Mousasi that night."

Joe Rogan 5:11 (sighs)

Brendan Schaub 5:12 That's a ... And knowing Gegard, you know, Mousasi.

Joe Rogan 5:15 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 5:15 Who, who ... He, he, he doesn't get enough recognition, how good that he, he is.

Joe Rogan 5:19 No, he's phenomenal.

Brendan Schaub 5:19 He's a absolute monster.

Joe Rogan 5:20 You gotta think about all the guys that he's beaten. Oh, he's on, like, a six or seven fight win streak, which includes Chris Weidman, Vitor Belfort, Talis Latif. Um, uh, who, who's the guy in, uh, Bellator? The former champion? Shlemenko?

Brendan Schaub 5:38 Uh, Sh- ... Yeah, I always ge- ... I always call him ...

Joe Rogan 5:40 So-

Brendan Schaub 5:40 I won't call him Shevchenko. That's fucked up. That's the girl.

Joe Rogan 5:43 Right. Shvaltino.

Brendan Schaub 5:43 But Shlemenko, something like that.

Joe Rogan 5:44 Shlemenko.

Brendan Schaub 5:44 Yeah. No, he's an absolute nightmare, man.

Joe Rogan 5:46 He's a monster.

Brendan Schaub 5:47 He's a monster. I'm surprised the UFC let him go. Now, when I say let him go, it just didn't matches his contract, you know, because Bellator probably offered more and they're like, "Oh, we're good."

Joe Rogan 5:55 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 5:56 They ... The UFC could use him right now at 185.

Joe Rogan 5:57 They certainly could. Yeah. Well, I mean, it's like they had Yoel Romero, they've got Robert Whittaker who's the champ. They've got so much going on at 185, but Gegard might be the best-... I mean, he's certainly in the running. If you looked at it objectively, it's entirely possible, if he's not number one, he's, he's number two.

Brendan Schaub 6:17 Top three, easily.

Joe Rogan 6:18 Number three, yeah. I mean-

Brendan Schaub 6:19 But also, you look at his fight with ... If, if him and Robert Whitaker were to fight, that's not a easy pick 'em fight.

Joe Rogan 6:25 No.

Brendan Schaub 6:26 Like, you would have ... You'd be like, "Damn, that's a fucking fight."

Joe Rogan 6:28 You might favor Kard. You don't know.

Brendan Schaub 6:30 Browbeat and long seasons and scrapple.

Joe Rogan 6:31 Listen, I per- ... Listen, Robert Whitaker is a monster. He's phenomenal.

Brendan Schaub 6:35 My favorite 85-er.

Joe Rogan 6:35 I mean, he's phenomenal, but so is Mousasi. So is Mousasi. And Mousasi has a full game, man. His ground game is phenomenal.

Brendan Schaub 6:43 And the biggest dick in the division.

Joe Rogan 6:44 Giant dick.

Brendan Schaub 6:45 There's so-

Joe Rogan 6:46 It's why you're here.

Brendan Schaub 6:46 That has to be taken into consideration for all this.

Joe Rogan 6:48 Yeah. Might be ... No, Yoel's, I bet it's bigger.

Brendan Schaub 6:50 No way.

Joe Rogan 6:51 I bet it's bigger.

Brendan Schaub 6:52 No, bro. He doesn't carry that energy.

Joe Rogan 6:53 I bet it's bigger.

Brendan Schaub 6:53 He's too aggressive.

Joe Rogan 6:54 What?

Brendan Schaub 6:55 Yeah, when you're that aggressive, you don't have that fat of a dick.

Joe Rogan 6:57 There's no way he looks like that and doesn't have a big dick.

Brendan Schaub 7:00 I don't know, dude. See, Batman-

Joe Rogan 7:01 That kind of build?

Brendan Schaub 7:01 Batman the comic drew a dick, and he's ... That's Batman. You know what I'm saying?

Joe Rogan 7:06 Batman?

Brendan Schaub 7:06 Yeah, Batman has a dick now.

Joe Rogan 7:08 What?

Brendan Schaub 7:08 The new, the new comic, they ... There's this new, like, kind of X-rated Batman they're coming out with, and they show Batman's dick.

Joe Rogan 7:14 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 7:14 That's how I picture-

Joe Rogan 7:16 This isn't even Batman.

Brendan Schaub 7:16 ... Yoel Romero.

Joe Rogan 7:17 This is nonsense.

Brendan Schaub 7:18 (laughs) This isn't even Batman.

Joe Rogan 7:19 These are millennials.

Brendan Schaub 7:19 This is nonsense. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 7:20 These are just fucking millennials that think they're gonna rewrite history. They're making Iron Man a woman. They're crazy.

Brendan Schaub 7:25 Yeah, that's true. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 7:26 These people are out of their fucking mind. Captain America's now a woman. Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 7:30 (sighs) Well, I'm just saying, man.

Joe Rogan 7:31 Iron Man's probably gay. Everyone's loo- ... It's this ... There's a weird revolution right now in comics because, uh, they're trying to, uh, sort of social justice warrior up all the com- comedy.

Brendan Schaub 7:43 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 7:43 All the comic books.

Brendan Schaub 7:44 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 7:44 What's going on? What are you laughing at?

Jamie Vernon 7:46 It's true, man.

Joe Rogan 7:47 It is true.

Brendan Schaub 7:47 It is true.

Jamie Vernon 7:47 It is true.

Brendan Schaub 7:48 Hulk Hogan's, uh-

Joe Rogan 7:49 Look at this. "DC Comics sorry for showing everyone Batman's penis."

Jamie Vernon 7:53 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 7:53 That's Yoel Romero, bro.

Joe Rogan 7:55 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 7:55 Now, it's good size.

Joe Rogan 7:56 But that's not, that's not real. That's not real. See, that's a comic book, and it's a comic book that's ... By the way, it was created in, like, what was ... Let's just take a guess when Batman was created. I'm gonna guess, like, 1940. What do you think is true?

Brendan Schaub 8:08 Super old school, 1940-

Joe Rogan 8:09 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 8:09 ... 1950s, probably '50s.

Joe Rogan 8:11 You can't rewrite Batman's dick in 2018.

Brendan Schaub 8:13 Also, think about the guy drawing it.

Joe Rogan 8:15 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 8:15 He probably didn't have the biggest dick.

Joe Rogan 8:16 Probably just a tiny, little dick.

Brendan Schaub 8:17 And just mad.

Joe Rogan 8:18 Yeah, mad.

Brendan Schaub 8:19 But maybe he thought that was massive.

Joe Rogan 8:20 Probably thought it was the biggest dick he's ever seen.

Brendan Schaub 8:22 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 8:22 Probably scared to watch porn.

Brendan Schaub 8:23 And then, and then got backlash, and he's like-

Joe Rogan 8:25 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 8:25 ... "What the fuck? I thought this was a big cock," and was like, "No, dude."

Joe Rogan 8:28 Not for Batman.

Brendan Schaub 8:29 It's Batman, you prick.

Joe Rogan 8:30 Yeah. Batman's the weirdest superhero ever, because he's basically just a rich guy.

Brendan Schaub 8:34 No, he's Elon Musk with ... on steroids.

Joe Rogan 8:37 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 8:37 And can fight. He's Elon Musk.

Joe Rogan 8:39 But with a ... Yeah. Yeah, basically.

Brendan Schaub 8:40 That's what he is.

Joe Rogan 8:40 With a bunch of stuff.

Brendan Schaub 8:41 Yeah, no special skills.

Joe Rogan 8:43 Yeah. Well, he knows how to fight.

Brendan Schaub 8:44 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 8:45 But h- he doesn't have any superpower.

Brendan Schaub 8:47 There's nothing. He's just a rich dude.

Joe Rogan 8:49 That's why I got angry at that Batman versus Superman movie.

Brendan Schaub 8:51 Oh, dude.

Joe Rogan 8:52 I'm like, "Bitch, Superman would ... First of all, he moves so fast, he could make the Earth spin backwards in reversed time."

Brendan Schaub 8:58 Dude, he has lasers in his eyes for God ... There's no fight.

Joe Rogan 9:02 And they, but they're like, "But, but, but, but, but Batman made a suit outta kryptonite. Muh, muh, muh, muh, muh, muh, muh, muh."

Brendan Schaub 9:08 David.

Joe Rogan 9:09 Superman would be fucking him up-

Brendan Schaub 9:10 I don't know how he got it. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 9:10 ... before he even got the suit on.

Brendan Schaub 9:11 Yeah, it's not even a fight.

Jamie Vernon 9:12 How is Lex Luthor a, a valiant, like, adversary for him, then?

Joe Rogan 9:16 He's not.

Jamie Vernon 9:17 Okay, well. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 9:17 He just is bored.

Brendan Schaub 9:18 (laughs) He's bored.

Joe Rogan 9:20 Keeps that dude around like a sidepiece. (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 9:25 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 9:25 (laughs) He just wants to have some fun.

Brendan Schaub 9:26 Dude-

Joe Rogan 9:26 He's like, "Let this guy pretend he's kicking my ass."

Brendan Schaub 9:29 Venom drops this weekend.

Joe Rogan 9:30 Yeah, Tom Hardy?

Brendan Schaub 9:31 I ... M- you know what? Maybe I'm just a Debbie Downer, but I don't-

Joe Rogan 9:35 Hm?

Brendan Schaub 9:35 ... I don't know. It looks all right to me.

Jamie Vernon 9:37 Oh? Oh?

Brendan Schaub 9:37 And I love ... I know, I love, uh, Tom Hardy too.

Joe Rogan 9:40 What? Venom is like an evil Spider-Man? Like, what is that?

Brendan Schaub 9:43 He's like Spider-Man's alien.

Joe Rogan 9:46 It's an alien?

Brendan Schaub 9:47 Yeah, he's ... It's an alien element that grabs someone's body.

Jamie Vernon 9:50 It's a alien that merges with his body.

Brendan Schaub 9:52 Yeah, and he's evil.

Joe Rogan 9:53 (sighs)

Brendan Schaub 9:54 I don't know, dude.

Joe Rogan 9:55 Fucking kids today.

Jamie Vernon 9:56 (sniffs)

Brendan Schaub 9:56 I know. I know, man. I know.

Joe Rogan 9:59 I mean, I guess it's better than remaking The Hulk for the 98th time.

Brendan Schaub 10:04 I'll take it.

Joe Rogan 10:05 I mean, how many Spider-Mans are there now? There's like 80 Spider-Mans? Whenever Spider-Man starts making some money, they go like, "Nah, player."

Brendan Schaub 10:11 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 10:11 "We got a new one."

Brendan Schaub 10:11 "We got a new one, bro. We got a new one."

Joe Rogan 10:13 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 10:13 Tobey Maguire's my Spider-Man.

Joe Rogan 10:15 Yeah, that's-

Brendan Schaub 10:15 If your Spider-Man's anyone else, fuck you.

Joe Rogan 10:17 Yeah, fuck you.

Brendan Schaub 10:18 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 10:18 That's the real Spider-Man.

Brendan Schaub 10:19 Hell yeah.

Joe Rogan 10:20 It's like ... (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 10:21 Fuck yeah.

Joe Rogan 10:21 They keep ... They had two new ones since him, right? Well, isn't it-

Jamie Vernon 10:25 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 10:25 ... been two ... One guy that never even got any traction.

Brendan Schaub 10:27 Tom, Tom-

Jamie Vernon 10:27 Tom Holland.

Joe Rogan 10:28 Who the fuck's Tom Holland? Sorry, Tom.

Brendan Schaub 10:30 They wanted to make-

Joe Rogan 10:30 I'm sure you're wonderful.

Brendan Schaub 10:31 They wanted to make Donald Glover Spider-Man.

Jamie Vernon 10:33 Yeah, they just ... Well, I think he's the voice in this cartoon they just announced today. This comes out this, uh-

Joe Rogan 10:37 Into the Spider-Verse gets stunning new trailer ahead of New York Comic Con. Mm.

Jamie Vernon 10:42 This comes out-

Joe Rogan 10:43 I was talking to Chris Pratt about Comic Con. (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 10:45 What'd he say?

Joe Rogan 10:46 You know, 'cause he's gotta go there for, uh, Guardians of the Galaxy.

Brendan Schaub 10:48 Oh, dude. He's probably like, "What the fuck?"

Joe Rogan 10:49 He's like, he goes, "I'm, I'm, I'm in the middle of this place, and I just said to myself, 'I don't belong here.'"

Brendan Schaub 10:54 Yeah. (laughs) Yeah.

Joe Rogan 10:55 "I don't belong here."

Brendan Schaub 10:56 It's a different vibe.

Joe Rogan 10:57 He is the nicest guy.

Brendan Schaub 10:59 He goes to a bunch of UFC events, yeah?

Joe Rogan 11:01 Uh, he's been to one. It was only one.

Brendan Schaub 11:03 Is that where you talked to him at?

Joe Rogan 11:03 Yeah. The fucking ... He came hunting with us in Utah.

Brendan Schaub 11:06 Oh, nice.

Joe Rogan 11:07 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 11:07 That's cool.

Joe Rogan 11:07 He's the fucking nicest guy, like so normal.

Brendan Schaub 11:10 Good-

Joe Rogan 11:10 Around everybody.

Brendan Schaub 11:11 Good hunter?

Joe Rogan 11:12 Yeah, real good. Good archer.

Brendan Schaub 11:14 People forget, he started off as a, uh, comedian/actor.

Joe Rogan 11:18 Yes.

Brendan Schaub 11:18 Like, he was ... Yeah, he was like a, the, the funny guy.

Joe Rogan 11:20 What was that show he was on? The Office?

Jamie Vernon 11:22 Parks and Rec.

Joe Rogan 11:22 Parks and Rec, right.

Brendan Schaub 11:23 Parks and Rec, yeah.

Joe Rogan 11:23 He was the funny guy.

Brendan Schaub 11:24 He was pu- pudgy.

Joe Rogan 11:25 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 11:25 Back then.

Jamie Vernon 11:26 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 11:26 Now he's all jacked.

Brendan Schaub 11:27 Isn't that weird? Someone was like, "Dude, you're gonna be the next action hero." He's like, "What?" "Here's a boatload of steroids. Do that."

Joe Rogan 11:33 I don't even think it was that. I think he just lost the weight, and everybody went, "Oh." You know, he was a wrestler in high school and college.

Brendan Schaub 11:38 Was he really?

Joe Rogan 11:38 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 11:38 In college?

Joe Rogan 11:39 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 11:39 Damn.

Joe Rogan 11:40 Yeah, good wrestler.

Brendan Schaub 11:42 He to- (laughs)

Joe Rogan 11:42 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 11:43 I can't tell this story.

Joe Rogan 11:43 You know, I saw w- I saw him wrestling with Nogueira.

Brendan Schaub 11:45 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 11:45 He actually looked pretty good.

Brendan Schaub 11:47 He was wrestling with Nogueira?

Joe Rogan 11:48 Yeah, there's video of him wrestling the Nogueira brothers.

Brendan Schaub 11:51 Just playing around?

Joe Rogan 11:51 Yeah, and I was like, "Damn, that dude knows what he's doing."

Brendan Schaub 11:52 I know he's a wrestler.

Joe Rogan 11:53 I had no idea he was a, you know, wrestling high school- He bought a, a farm in, uh, like outside of Seattle, and raises animals and a- a- actually has like a farm.

Brendan Schaub 12:05 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 12:05 Like a real, um ... I think the way they ca- ... Just like very humane, ethical treatment of the animals. Like the animals are all like super adjusted to human beings, and then when they whack 'em, they just take 'em into a room and put one in their brain.

Brendan Schaub 12:20 ... and he does it or this is just his career?

Joe Rogan 12:22 Yeah, it's him and Nogueira.

Brendan Schaub 12:24 Yeah, look at this. But for, you know, I had no idea, I just thought he was a normal actor.

Joe Rogan 12:28 No, man.

Brendan Schaub 12:28 Like most, most time when you watch actors, you're like, "Look at this bullshit."

Joe Rogan 12:30 Yeah, no, he knows how to wrestle.

Brendan Schaub 12:30 I mean, you look at his setup, everything, yeah.

Joe Rogan 12:32 Yeah, no, he knows how to wrestle. He wrestled in college and in high school.

Brendan Schaub 12:36 Well, you know, if, if he's feeling frisky, the UFC is looking for fighters these days. I don't know what he's looking to do.

Joe Rogan 12:41 Good luck paying that guy. That guy is making $20 million a movie. How the fuck are you gonna pay him for that?

Brendan Schaub 12:46 We'll figure it out.

Joe Rogan 12:47 He's-

Brendan Schaub 12:47 That's Star-Lord, bro. You know, come up with your own whiskey, bro.

Joe Rogan 12:50 He's someone else besides Star-Lord too. What else, what other movies does he do?

Brendan Schaub 12:54 Guardians of the Galaxy.

Guest 12:56 Uh, Jurassic Park.

Brendan Schaub 12:56 Oh.

Joe Rogan 12:56 That's right.

Brendan Schaub 12:57 Dude.

Guest 12:57 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 12:57 Jurassic Park too.

Brendan Schaub 12:58 He's the dinosaur wrangler, bro.

Joe Rogan 13:00 Come on, man. He's a dinosaur wrangler at Jurassic Park.

Brendan Schaub 13:02 And he-

Joe Rogan 13:02 He speaks to the raptors.

Brendan Schaub 13:04 And he's Star-Lord.

Guest 13:04 And he hunts raptors.

Joe Rogan 13:04 Yeah. And here, here's the thing, he came in like, you know, there was already Jurassic Park before and he came in with a new Jurassic Park.

Brendan Schaub 13:12 With the hotness.

Joe Rogan 13:14 With no hiccups.

Brendan Schaub 13:15 Zero.

Joe Rogan 13:15 No one was like, "Bullshit with this new Jurassic Park." There was none of that.

Brendan Schaub 13:19 It got better.

Joe Rogan 13:20 Yeah, it got better.

Brendan Schaub 13:21 Well, the animation got better too.

Joe Rogan 13:22 The animation is way better.

Brendan Schaub 13:22 The dinosaurs got super legit.

Joe Rogan 13:24 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 13:24 I haven't seen the newest one though.

Joe Rogan 13:25 It's fucking badass.

Brendan Schaub 13:26 Is it good?

Joe Rogan 13:26 Yeah, loved it. Loved it. Freaked my kid out though.

Brendan Schaub 13:30 I'd like to see it.

Joe Rogan 13:30 Little one had to bury her head in my armpit during some of the scenes.

Brendan Schaub 13:33 Really?

Joe Rogan 13:33 Yeah, those fucking things are scary as shit.

Brendan Schaub 13:34 Those things look legit.

Joe Rogan 13:35 They look real.

Brendan Schaub 13:36 They're re- You, you know they're redoing the Jurassic Park ride at Universal?

Joe Rogan 13:40 They're redoing it?

Brendan Schaub 13:40 They're do-

Joe Rogan 13:40 Yeah, they should it's whack as fuck.

Guest 13:42 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 13:42 Yeah, now it's just that T-Rex like (imitates T-Rex)

Joe Rogan 13:43 It's terrible.

Guest 13:44 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 13:44 No, the guy was talk- I heard an interview, the guy's like, "No, we're redoing it with all the new dinosaurs, everything."

Joe Rogan 13:49 Yeah, there's some good shit at Universal and then there's some stuff that you're like, "What?"

Brendan Schaub 13:54 Old school.

Joe Rogan 13:55 Well, you know what's badass? The Harry Potter ride. Have you taken little man to the Harry Potter ride?

Brendan Schaub 13:59 No, he's not big enough still.

Joe Rogan 14:00 Oh.

Brendan Schaub 14:00 He's only two and a half.

Joe Rogan 14:01 That's right. I think you have to be like 40 inches or some shit. But the Jurassic, their Jurassic Park ride is whack. You know what's great? The Simpsons.

Brendan Schaub 14:09 Simpsons is dope. I've done Simpsons.

Joe Rogan 14:10 It's hilarious.

Brendan Schaub 14:11 Simpsons is great.

Joe Rogan 14:12 That's a great ride.

Brendan Schaub 14:13 Dude, I, as a grown ass man, just I, got a babysitter for my kid and me and my girl went to Six Flags.

Joe Rogan 14:18 Oh, dude, Six Flags is badass.

Brendan Schaub 14:20 So much fun.

Joe Rogan 14:21 You know what's surprisingly good? Knott's Berry Farms.

Guest 14:24 Mm.

Brendan Schaub 14:25 It, uh, it's very old school, a little vintage.

Joe Rogan 14:27 Some of the fucking rides are amazing.

Brendan Schaub 14:30 Th- to me they're a little-

Joe Rogan 14:31 What'd you go?

Brendan Schaub 14:31 ... they're a little suspect. Like a year ago, like the, the, uh-

Joe Rogan 14:33 Suspect like they might break?

Brendan Schaub 14:34 Yeah. Like, like-

Guest 14:36 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 14:36 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 14:36 Like the wood rollercoaster, I'm like, "Really?"

Joe Rogan 14:39 Or that one.

Brendan Schaub 14:40 It's all ... And it's like rattling, like, "When's the last time someone checked this goddamn thing?"

Joe Rogan 14:44 I didn't go on that one, but I went on one where you sit in your seat like this, right? And then you go like this, clink, (imitates ride) it goes straight up.

Brendan Schaub 14:51 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 14:52 So your back, like if you fell, you would fall right on your back.

Guest 14:55 Right, oh, it's over.

Joe Rogan 14:56 And then you get to the top and you pause and then they turn you like this and then this, "Yeah."

Brendan Schaub 15:02 That's pretty fun. That's pretty fun.

Guest 15:04 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 15:05 It was the best rollercoasters I've ever been on.

Brendan Schaub 15:08 Knott's is, uh, skeptical hippo eyes, 'cause when you get there, their whole theme is Charlie Brown. It's like who the fuck's watching Charlie Brown these days?

Joe Rogan 15:16 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 15:16 Everyone asks that, "Is Spider-Man, Marvel."

Joe Rogan 15:18 Right.

Brendan Schaub 15:18 You got Disney with Mickey, they got Charlie Brown.

Joe Rogan 15:21 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 15:21 My kid's like, "Who the fuck is Charlie Brown?"

Joe Rogan 15:22 I didn't even notice Charlie Brown. It was all like th- there's a Wild West theme area.

Brendan Schaub 15:26 Oh, it's random as shit at Knott's Berry.

Joe Rogan 15:27 There's a bunch of random, weird things. (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 15:29 But their, their main slogan is Charlie Brown.

Joe Rogan 15:32 Well, we, we had a good time, me and the family had a good time.

Brendan Schaub 15:34 We had a good time, man.

Joe Rogan 15:35 You know what, uh, I'll tell you what though, all, overall best ride I've ever been on 100% is Disney World. The Jurassic, not the Jurassic Park, the Avatar ride.

Brendan Schaub 15:47 Oh, wow.

Joe Rogan 15:47 The Avatar ride in Orlando.

Brendan Schaub 15:49 All right.

Joe Rogan 15:50 It's called Flights of Passage, I think it is. Dude, bo- beyond the greatest ride ever. It's all virtual reality. You climb into like a chair, like you're on a motorcycle, that pushes against your back and you, you settle into this thing and then you put these goggles on, like this headset thing on and you're in full virtual reality. And this is it. And you, this is the-

Brendan Schaub 16:12 God damn.

Joe Rogan 16:12 This is the one where you're on the boat. There's two actual Avatar rides. This one's pretty dope too.

Guest 16:18 That's awesome.

Brendan Schaub 16:18 That looks legit. That looks like Avatar World.

Joe Rogan 16:21 Yeah, this one, that's pretty dope too. That one you're on a boat like Pirates of the Caribbean. Yeah, this is it. So-

Brendan Schaub 16:26 I like the boat.

Joe Rogan 16:27 The boat's pretty badass. But this one you're flying in full virtual reality while you're riding on the back of one of those dragon things.

Brendan Schaub 16:34 I mean, I've seen better graphics on it, but-

Joe Rogan 16:36 No, no, no, what, that's, you're just not getting-

Brendan Schaub 16:38 This isn't doing it, okay.

Guest 16:39 They must film their screen and just put it on YouTube.

Joe Rogan 16:42 No, when you're there... Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 16:42 It sounds nice though.

Joe Rogan 16:42 And if they filmed their screen, they're not even filming their screen in 3D, right?

Brendan Schaub 16:46 No, not at all.

Joe Rogan 16:46 So he's just using his cellphone, that's why it looks all blurry.

Brendan Schaub 16:48 Is the, is the line, line long as shit?

Joe Rogan 16:51 Long as shit.

Brendan Schaub 16:52 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 16:53 And then while you're doing it, like you get breezes in your face and you smell things.

Brendan Schaub 16:58 It sounds nice.

Joe Rogan 16:58 It's fucking incredible, man. It feels real. It's the best ride I've ever been on, by far. Like, I gotta... I've been on some dope rides, that's numero uno with a bullet.

Brendan Schaub 17:06 By far.

Joe Rogan 17:07 By far.

Brendan Schaub 17:08 Oh, wow.

Joe Rogan 17:08 Yeah, I did it two times in a row.

Brendan Schaub 17:10 How- dude, I'm a sucker for the... I'm old school, I like the Haunted Mansion.

Joe Rogan 17:13 Haunted Mansion's badass.

Brendan Schaub 17:13 It's one of the old school ones, man. And then they put in, uh, um, what is it, uh, Nightmare Before Christmas?

Joe Rogan 17:20 Yes.

Brendan Schaub 17:20 Big Jack?

Joe Rogan 17:20 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 17:20 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 17:21 Right around, around Halloween time.

Brendan Schaub 17:23 I love it, man.

Joe Rogan 17:23 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 17:23 I love Halloween.

Joe Rogan 17:24 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 17:24 Love it.

Joe Rogan 17:26 Yeah, have you taken him to Disneyland yet?

Brendan Schaub 17:28 Oh, yeah.

Joe Rogan 17:29 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 17:29 Season pass.

Joe Rogan 17:30 Oh, it's the shit, right?

Brendan Schaub 17:30 Sometimes I feel like he's getting spoiled because, you know, when I'm working, my girl will take him and her friends and they go. He's going when he's not in school, he's in school now, but two times a week, you know what I'm saying?

Joe Rogan 17:40 To Disneyland?

Brendan Schaub 17:41 Oh, yeah.

Joe Rogan 17:41 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 17:41 They go just to chill. That little dude's-

Joe Rogan 17:44 That's pretty crazy.

Brendan Schaub 17:45 ... screwed when he gets older.

Joe Rogan 17:46 I know, that is crazy.

Brendan Schaub 17:47 So spoiled. It was such a big deal when I was a kid. It was such a big deal.

Joe Rogan 17:51 Didn't you go with Joey Diaz and Joey's family? Did you go with Joey and Joey's family?

Brendan Schaub 17:55 No, that was Eddie.

Joe Rogan 17:56 Oh, that's right, Eddie went with him. Yeah, that's gotta be a trip. Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 18:00 Good fun.

Joe Rogan 18:01 It's, uh, Disneyland when you have kids becomes a totally different thing.

Brendan Schaub 18:04 It's a special place.

Joe Rogan 18:06 Yeah, I was like, before I had kids I was like, "I'm not going to fucking Disneyland."

Brendan Schaub 18:10 I know.

Joe Rogan 18:10 You know, like if I was 20 and someone said, "Hey, man, you wanna go to Disneyland?" I'd be like, "Why? What are we gonna do? We're gonna ride a rollercoaster and wait for an hour and a half?"

Brendan Schaub 18:18 Split a funnel cake and suck each other off? What's wrong with you, man? Yo.

Guest 18:21 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 18:21 And those, um, what are those fucking, those-

Brendan Schaub 18:25 ... the ones, the brown sugar churros. Sure. Oh, do I love a nice churro. Oh, those. Goddamn, those are hard to pass up. God, the smell. The smell. Dude- When you walk by, I'm like, "Ah." ... you can't be on a diet and go to Disneyland.

Joe Rogan 18:34 It's hard, the almonds they have, the cinnamon almonds.

Brendan Schaub 18:37 They get you, bro.

Joe Rogan 18:37 They have almonds. Oh, yeah, roasted almonds.

Brendan Schaub 18:39 The churros do?

Joe Rogan 18:40 No, not in the churro-

Brendan Schaub 18:41 Oh, they do.

Joe Rogan 18:41 ... but, like, the, yeah, the stands all over the place.

Brendan Schaub 18:42 The machines, yeah, they have, like, the candied, uh, almonds.

Joe Rogan 18:46 You know what they have one thing that's guilt-free though, that big old turkey leg, that smoked turkey leg.

Brendan Schaub 18:51 That thing makes me feel sick-

Joe Rogan 18:52 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 18:52 ... when I see just these enormous people just chowing down and then the p- the meat's all pink in the middle-

Joe Rogan 18:58 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 18:58 ... for whatever reason. Well, it's smoked. Is everyone out of shape at Disneyland? It's a weird vibe.

Joe Rogan 19:03 They're just not out of shape, they're ambulatory.

Brendan Schaub 19:04 Oh, dude.

Joe Rogan 19:05 Yeah. There's more people that can't walk, they're just on scooters because they got so big their body just stopped moving.

Brendan Schaub 19:12 God.

Joe Rogan 19:13 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 19:13 It's a strange vibe there. You can't be on a diet and go to am- amusement park.

Joe Rogan 19:17 You gotta accept that you're gonna fuck off that day.

Brendan Schaub 19:19 For sure.

Joe Rogan 19:20 That's a fuck off day. That's like, "We're gonna get some ice cream, I'm gonna drink a regular soda." Ugh.

Brendan Schaub 19:25 Oh.

Joe Rogan 19:25 Whoa.

Brendan Schaub 19:26 Dude, I'll tell you where else you can't be on a diet, Chicago. I was there a few weeks ago-

Joe Rogan 19:29 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 19:29 ... I went, "Fuck it."

Joe Rogan 19:30 Did you go to Lou Malnati's?

Brendan Schaub 19:31 I went, I went, ate every pizza.

Joe Rogan 19:33 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 19:33 And I apologized to every crowd beforehand.

Joe Rogan 19:35 That is not a pizza, that is a goddamn casserole.

Brendan Schaub 19:38 It is a straight, it's, it's a casserole, it's a lasagna.

Joe Rogan 19:40 It's way too-

Brendan Schaub 19:40 It's a pie.

Joe Rogan 19:41 It's a pie.

Brendan Schaub 19:41 It's a pie.

Joe Rogan 19:42 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 19:42 Dude, I felt so sick after them.

Joe Rogan 19:44 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 19:44 But it was so nice going down. I felt so sick.

Joe Rogan 19:47 That's a weird sacrifice, right? You decide, "I'm gonna be sick for a few hours for just a few seconds of mouth pleasure."

Brendan Schaub 19:55 Yeah. And like, a- again, I apologize to the crowds. I'm like, "You shouldn't be doing this, man."

Joe Rogan 19:58 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 19:58 This is a, it's like a fight or missing weight. Like, it's such an asshole move.

Joe Rogan 20:03 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 20:03 My face is all swollen from the sodium, ugh.

Joe Rogan 20:06 Look at that. Oh, look at that. Which one was that?

Brendan Schaub 20:12 (sighs) That was at the place where, uh, it's the famous place, um, a, the Grinder, something Grinder, where it comes in a bowl and it's where, uh, Grinder-

Joe Rogan 20:20 Grinder is a, that is a gay, um, dating app.

Brendan Schaub 20:22 It's a gay site, yeah, but it's also a delicious pizza. Chicago Pizza-

Joe Rogan 20:25 Chicago Pizza Grinder? Oh.

Brendan Schaub 20:26 Oven and Grind, Oven Grinder.

Joe Rogan 20:28 I wonder if they're bummed out that Grinder is all-

Brendan Schaub 20:30 Oh, motherfucker.

Joe Rogan 20:31 ... sucking dicks and butt fucking.

Brendan Schaub 20:32 And then he thought you're gonna get a deep dish and a blow job or some shit.

Joe Rogan 20:35 Here's your deep dish, bitch. (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 20:38 (laughs) But, uh, it's that same place where Al Capone and his men, uh, uh, staked out before they did the St. Valentine's Day Massacre.

Joe Rogan 20:46 Really?

Brendan Schaub 20:46 So it's, like, a historic place, yeah.

Joe Rogan 20:48 Oh, so it's old as fuck.

Brendan Schaub 20:49 Two-hour wait.

Joe Rogan 20:50 Whoa.

Brendan Schaub 20:51 Two-hour wait.

Joe Rogan 20:52 You waited two hours for food?

Brendan Schaub 20:54 Two-hour wait.

Joe Rogan 20:54 It's a two-hour wait.

Brendan Schaub 20:55 It's a two-hour wait.

Joe Rogan 20:56 Wow.

Brendan Schaub 20:57 I put my name in Strolled Around.

Joe Rogan 20:59 Oh, good move.

Brendan Schaub 21:00 I know.

Joe Rogan 21:00 You gotta do what you gotta do.

Brendan Schaub 21:01 Yeah, that, no, there's no freebies there, they don't give a fuck so-

Joe Rogan 21:04 Ooh, that's a lot of food, man. They don't fuck around. People get cold, that's the thing. If you live in a place where people get cold, like Boston or Chicago, people get thick.

Brendan Schaub 21:14 They thick, yes, yeah.

Joe Rogan 21:15 They get thick.

Brendan Schaub 21:16 It's tough, it's tough to work out in the cold, man.

Joe Rogan 21:17 No, not just that, it, like, it insulates you.

Brendan Schaub 21:20 Oh, that makes sense.

Joe Rogan 21:21 If you wanna live in a place that-

Brendan Schaub 21:21 You don't wanna be shredded.

Joe Rogan 21:23 Pfft.

Brendan Schaub 21:23 You don't want to be shredded near that water.

Joe Rogan 21:25 I know.

Brendan Schaub 21:25 The wind comes off that lake.

Joe Rogan 21:28 Makes sense.

Brendan Schaub 21:29 You ever been to Chicago in January?

Joe Rogan 21:30 Yes.

Brendan Schaub 21:31 Woo. Miserable.

Joe Rogan 21:32 Cold as fuck.

Brendan Schaub 21:33 Not my cup of tea.

Joe Rogan 21:34 It's a great place to perform though.

Brendan Schaub 21:36 Yeah, love Chicago.

Joe Rogan 21:36 The audiences are amazing.

Brendan Schaub 21:37 Amazing.

Joe Rogan 21:38 They're f- they're just fun. They're fun people. You know what they are? They're a unique combination of, like, the Midwest and a giant city.

Brendan Schaub 21:45 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 21:46 Same as Toronto. Toronto is like that too.

Brendan Schaub 21:48 Love Toronto.

Joe Rogan 21:48 But it's the same kind of vibe. It's a weird combination of, like, really nice sm- almost small town people that live in a giant urban city.

Brendan Schaub 21:58 And Toronto is a melting pot.

Joe Rogan 21:59 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 21:59 It is just like... To me, Toronto reminds me of New York, not with the hustle and cleaner.

Joe Rogan 22:05 Yeah, way cleaner.

Brendan Schaub 22:05 I love Toronto.

Joe Rogan 22:06 More polite people too.

Brendan Schaub 22:07 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 22:07 And it's-

Brendan Schaub 22:08 Way, way nicer.

Joe Rogan 22:08 You know, you get Indian people, Pakistani, Black, Asian, white, European, I mean, you get everybody in Toronto.

Brendan Schaub 22:17 Now, on the other end of that, I was just in, uh, Seattle, Washington, and the crowd was all white.

Joe Rogan 22:23 White.

Brendan Schaub 22:23 All white.

Joe Rogan 22:24 That is, that is the white capital.

Brendan Schaub 22:24 I was the darkest dude in the, in the building.

Joe Rogan 22:26 Yeah, them and Portland, they're white as fuck. Even if you're Black, after a few generations, you just turn white.

Brendan Schaub 22:32 And you start talking white.

Joe Rogan 22:33 If your, if you bring your family up there and you, you plan on k- you know, staking out a Black existence-

Brendan Schaub 22:39 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 22:39 ... in Portland-

Brendan Schaub 22:39 Good luck.

Joe Rogan 22:40 ... good luck. If, even if you, your, your kids only date other Black kids-

Brendan Schaub 22:44 (laughs) That's-

Joe Rogan 22:44 ... after, like, 100 years, everyone's gonna be white.

Brendan Schaub 22:47 Everyone. (coughs)

Joe Rogan 22:48 There's no sun.

Brendan Schaub 22:48 Everybody. Yeah.

Joe Rogan 22:48 There's no sun. That sun for three months a year... Look, there's a reason why people became white. I mean, everyone really comes from Africa.

Brendan Schaub 22:55 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 22:56 It's one of the real reasons why racism is so stupid. Every single fucking human being came from Africa, just like every single fucking dog came from a wolf. Every person started out as an African, it's just as we moved to shittier and shittier places with less and less sun, your body adapted. And y- basically, white skin is like a, a big old solar panel for vitamin B, or vitamin D rather.

Brendan Schaub 23:20 Do you, I don't... And obviously we don't, I don't know anyone who is racist these days though.

Joe Rogan 23:25 There's a few.

Brendan Schaub 23:25 They're, they're out there, for sure.

Joe Rogan 23:26 You can find them.

Brendan Schaub 23:26 But I don't, I don't, I don't have anyone that I even, you know-

Joe Rogan 23:31 Associate with.

Brendan Schaub 23:32 Not even.

Joe Rogan 23:32 No.

Brendan Schaub 23:32 But even, like, jokingly or like, "I don't like Asians." Or, "I don't like Black people." I, I don't-

Joe Rogan 23:37 That is exhausting.

Brendan Schaub 23:37 I don't know any.

Joe Rogan 23:38 No. No, not in our circle.

Brendan Schaub 23:39 Or any that are doing well.

Joe Rogan 23:41 No. It's a stupid mindset. It's a stupid mindset. It just really is. It's dumb just as... I mean-

Brendan Schaub 23:49 It's very old school.

Joe Rogan 23:50 Well, it's just, it's, it doesn't benefit you in any way. It's super detrimental (clears throat) for your view of the world, the way you interact with people, just it's dumb. I mean, I know so many cool people of every single race. Like what, you know? I mean, why would you-

Brendan Schaub 24:06 That's so stupid. It's like judging white people off a, a few small portion sample size of, like, mass shooters.

Joe Rogan 24:13 Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 24:13 Like the dumbasses shoot up the high schools.

Joe Rogan 24:16 Well, there's, you know, there's, like, blowback the other way, right? Like, there's a lot of people who think it's okay to be racist against white people because so many white people have been racist in the past, but that's just as foolish and just as shortsighted. It's just-

Brendan Schaub 24:28 And everyone's different. Yeah, it's all stupid.

Joe Rogan 24:30 It's like today, e-... with all this Me Too stuff, um, it seems like it's okay to be sexist against men-

Brendan Schaub 24:37 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 24:37 ... um, because there are awful men out there. But, there's also men that are nice and they're gonna be nice to you.

Brendan Schaub 24:44 There's also some awful women out there who-

Joe Rogan 24:46 100%.

Brendan Schaub 24:46 ... do have other agendas when they come out with these Me Too claims.

Joe Rogan 24:49 Go ahead. That's-

Brendan Schaub 24:50 There's a lot of that.

Joe Rogan 24:50 ... what you're seeing. I mean, we're, we're seeing these cases now, you know? And we're seeing these cases get exposed for what they are, you know? And it, it's, it, it... The problem is that it casts doubt on legitimate cases. What is going on with my throat? (clears throat) Something about these goddamn caveman coffees.

Brendan Schaub 25:07 Really?

Joe Rogan 25:08 (coughs) Early in the morning.

Brendan Schaub 25:10 That makes me think.

Joe Rogan 25:11 (clears throat)

Brendan Schaub 25:11 I'm good though.

Joe Rogan 25:12 Mm.

Brendan Schaub 25:12 Sometimes it's dairy.

Joe Rogan 25:13 I know, you think, you think you have to-

Brendan Schaub 25:13 Well, I'm like, "Damn, something's not right."

Joe Rogan 25:15 (clears throat) "I'm good." Yeah, I-

Brendan Schaub 25:15 Um, did you think, uh, if you were in Louis C.K.'s shoes, do you think he came back too soon?

Joe Rogan 25:20 I don't think it's that he came back too soon. What I honestly think is he should say something more than what he already said. (clears throat)

Brendan Schaub 25:30 Not just show up like it's all good and like-

Joe Rogan 25:31 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 25:31 ... "All right."

Joe Rogan 25:31 There's not just... I mean, we're seeing these cases now, you know? We're seeing these cases get exposed for what they are, you know? And it's, it, it... The problem is that it casts doubt on legitimate cases. What is going on with my throat? (clears throat) Something about these goddamn caveman coffees.

Brendan Schaub 25:31 Really?

Joe Rogan 25:31 (clears throat) Early in the morning.

Brendan Schaub 25:31 That makes me think.

Joe Rogan 25:31 (clears throat)

Brendan Schaub 25:31 I'm good though.

Joe Rogan 25:31 Mm.

Brendan Schaub 25:31 Sometimes it's dairy.

Joe Rogan 25:31 I know, you think-

Brendan Schaub 25:31 Where I'm like, "Damn, something's not right."

Joe Rogan 25:31 You think you have to... (clears throat)

Brendan Schaub 25:31 Did you think, uh, if you were in Louis C.K.'s shoes, do you think he came back too soon?

Joe Rogan 25:31 I don't think it's that he came back too soon. What I honestly think is he should say something more than what he already said. (clears throat)

Brendan Schaub 25:31 Not just show up like it's all good and like, "All right."

Joe Rogan 25:32 Yeah. There's not just... I mean, he said, he put out, released a statement, these stories are true. They happened a long time ago, right? They happened, like, more than a decade ago. I think he should... And I think it might be even better to release a video rather than, um, than a written statement. Because a written statement, the problem is, like, it's impersonal. It's personal-

Brendan Schaub 25:55 Seems fake.

Joe Rogan 25:55 Yeah. Well, it's not even... Not only that it's, it's, it's not as impactful. I want to s... But what is he gonna say? It's like, I can't fix it.

Brendan Schaub 26:03 (clears throat)

Joe Rogan 26:03 Maybe if he donated a certain amount of money to certain causes or, you know-

Brendan Schaub 26:09 (clears throat)

Joe Rogan 26:09 ... spent, you know, time in therapy or talked about it and ex- and maybe expressed himself and said that what was, you know, what was going on through, through, through, in his mind during that time when he did the thing and why it was wrong-

Brendan Schaub 26:28 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 26:28 ... and how he's changed his, his way and how bad he feels about it, how he's apologized to these people-

Brendan Schaub 26:33 And he has daughters.

Joe Rogan 26:34 Right.

Brendan Schaub 26:34 I think he, I think you get all that done by just doing a video with his... I think it would go so much further for him if he didn't have a big production, nothing.

Joe Rogan 26:41 Right.

Brendan Schaub 26:41 And he's a creative dude, obviously-

Joe Rogan 26:43 (clears throat)

Brendan Schaub 26:43 ... a great comedian. If he just went off the top of his head straight into the camera and posted it on Instagram. Was like, "Hey man, I've, I've paid a price." You know?

Joe Rogan 26:50 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 26:50 "I've paid... I've learned, I have daughters. It was a horrible thing that I did."

Joe Rogan 26:53 I mean, even stay away from, "I've paid a price," 'cause people don't really wanna hear that shit. Like, what is the price? Like what-

Brendan Schaub 26:58 But they don't think he has.

Joe Rogan 26:59 Well, they (blows raspberries) , they're crazy.

Brendan Schaub 27:01 Well, a lot of people go-

Joe Rogan 27:01 He's lost millions of dollars.

Brendan Schaub 27:02 They don't realize that. They think, "Oh, he's fine and he should get back on the road and touring's gonna be a millionaire."

Joe Rogan 27:07 Well, he could.

Brendan Schaub 27:07 Well, he's lost a ton of sh- ton of money off his shows, FX deal, development deal.

Joe Rogan 27:11 And more importantly, his daughters have this image of him being this guy who jerks off in front of women.

Brendan Schaub 27:17 That's never gonna go away either.

Joe Rogan 27:18 No.

Brendan Schaub 27:18 So that's, that's a pretty heavy stamp.

Joe Rogan 27:21 I mean-

Brendan Schaub 27:21 Which, which is deserved.

Joe Rogan 27:23 (clears throat) It is.

Brendan Schaub 27:24 Maybe not, maybe not forever, but-

Joe Rogan 27:25 But it's, it's a complicated issue. You know, it's complicated, like, what was his psychology? What was going on in his mind that, that allowed him to do that? Apparently, he just started going up again. He just went up again Sunday night.

Brendan Schaub 27:36 He did. Uh, yeah, he just went, he went up and I guess the, the owner of the club was like, "Dude, I, I didn't know, I was asleep. He went up." You know, it's the crowd's discretion if they wanna stay or leave, but-

Joe Rogan 27:46 Well, the first time the, the owner was u- upset and the second time they said something along the lines of, "If anyone has an issue with someone who stops in, AKA Louis." I mean, it's only Louis.

Brendan Schaub 27:58 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 27:58 Maybe Aziz, I guess.

Brendan Schaub 28:00 Really? Well, no. That's kinda like a-

Joe Rogan 28:01 With Aziz, the, the... Yeah, apparently some people got upset about Aziz too.

Brendan Schaub 28:03 Still?

Joe Rogan 28:04 But the Azi- Yeah, du- dude, look, people just like targets, they like targets.

Brendan Schaub 28:08 Well, they, they, they like negativity.

Joe Rogan 28:11 (clears throat) They like negativity, but they also like targets.

Brendan Schaub 28:14 (clears throat)

Joe Rogan 28:15 When they find someone who's a viable target.

Brendan Schaub 28:17 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 28:17 Someone who's done something they can criticize and they go, "You! What have you done?"

Brendan Schaub 28:22 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 28:22 "You! Oh, you're still alive."

Brendan Schaub 28:24 Yep.

Joe Rogan 28:25 You know, they, there's people that just want to decide that someone's a horrible person and it, and they don't have this really well thought out, you know, comprehensive view of the situation. They just attack. You know?

Brendan Schaub 28:39 (sighs)

Joe Rogan 28:39 There's a lot of those people out there, man. And they think that they're justified, particularly if that person's famous and they're not-

Brendan Schaub 28:45 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 28:45 ... they think it's fair game.

Brendan Schaub 28:46 Yep. Public forum.

Joe Rogan 28:48 So people were definitely upset at Aziz, but much, much more upset about Louis.

Brendan Schaub 28:52 Oh, 100%.

Joe Rogan 28:53 But when you stop and think about what Louis actually did. Creepy, yes. Asked women if he could jerk off in front of them. They said yes, he did it. If they said no, he didn't. I mean, it's, it's fucking... Look, if you're working with a guy like that and he's like, "Can I jerk off in front of you?" And you're like, "Jesus Christ." (slaps desk) Can you imagine?

Brendan Schaub 29:09 Like, what the fuck?

Joe Rogan 29:10 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 29:10 It would... Shitty work environment for sure.

Joe Rogan 29:12 Terrible.

Brendan Schaub 29:13 And he is not handsome.

Joe Rogan 29:15 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 29:15 He is bru... Uh, Louis, I love you, brutal to look at.

Joe Rogan 29:18 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 29:18 You know what I'm saying? He's harsh on the eyes.

Joe Rogan 29:20 Yeah, I mean-

Brendan Schaub 29:20 It's not like Brad Pitt's asking to jack off in front of you.

Joe Rogan 29:23 Right.

Brendan Schaub 29:23 Not that it's ever right, but it-

Joe Rogan 29:25 Right.

Brendan Schaub 29:25 ... would do less on the-

Joe Rogan 29:27 It's like-

Brendan Schaub 29:27 ... on the feelings if Brad Pitt's yanking in front of you.

Joe Rogan 29:29 I mean, (sighs) all of it, all of it's no bueno.

Brendan Schaub 29:32 It's a whole mess.

Joe Rogan 29:33 Yeah. I mean, he obviously had some sort of a weird kink, you know?

Brendan Schaub 29:37 I wonder what that is. Probably started in childhood, maybe he got caught and then got off on it and-

Joe Rogan 29:41 Right, right.

Brendan Schaub 29:42 Or he just never got chicks and now he has this power because he's such a, you know-

Joe Rogan 29:46 He didn't have the power when he started doing it, though, man. When he started doing it, he wasn't that, really famous. He was respected-

Brendan Schaub 29:52 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 29:52 But he wasn't really famous.

Brendan Schaub 29:53 But he wasn't like he is now, yeah.

Joe Rogan 29:54 No. Which is, it's, um, you know, it's, it's awful. But it's, it's just a thing that he's stuck with now. So he's gotta figure out how to ingratiate himself. He's gotta figure out, uh, how to, to reemerge. And I think-

Brendan Schaub 30:13 He can do it.

Joe Rogan 30:14 I think he can do it.

Brendan Schaub 30:15 Sure he can do it.

Joe Rogan 30:16 Look, he, he's not an awful person.

Brendan Schaub 30:18 No.

Joe Rogan 30:18 I just think he did some stupid things that are really gross and weird. But, if he just... I mean, and he, and he has owned up to it. I think he just, you know, makes some sort of a sincere apology and then does something. Like, what could you do-... to, to, I mean, what are you-

Brendan Schaub 30:34 Help female comics maybe? Do a, do a-

Joe Rogan 30:36 He's done that. He's tried to help, but a lot of people accused him of trying to help them-

Brendan Schaub 30:40 Made a mad.

Joe Rogan 30:41 ... to try to cover up his tracks.

Brendan Schaub 30:42 Well, fuck, man.

Joe Rogan 30:43 You know?

Brendan Schaub 30:43 You gotta, he has to do something. He has to go back to work.

Joe Rogan 30:48 Yeah. I mean, it's been a year now, right? It's a year next month. I think to expect him to just never work again seems ridiculous.

Brendan Schaub 30:59 It's crazy.

Joe Rogan 30:59 And to not forgive him. There has to be a path, uh, to redemption for anyone who's done anything other than actual rape or murder, right? Like, for Bill Cosby, I'm very happy he's locked up. I think what he did is awful. Can you imagine being one of those girls that turned to him as a mentor and you wake up and y- you know, you're, you've been violated while you're out cold-

Brendan Schaub 31:21 Terrible. Terrible.

Joe Rogan 31:21 ... and you're drugged and you're confused.

Brendan Schaub 31:22 Horrible.

Joe Rogan 31:23 And Bill Cosby did it to you. And who the fuck is gonna believe that? His image is... That's the thing about Louis, right? Like, Louis' image was like, he's a pervert, he's a weirdo, he's always talking about jerking off. Like, when you found out Louis C.K. asked girls if he could jerk off in front of them and then did it, it's like, not the most surprising thing.

Brendan Schaub 31:39 No.

Joe Rogan 31:39 But with Bill Cosby, it's, here's a guy who is, and I'm not comparing the, the acts at all, but I'm just saying as far as like famous people who've done something that, you know, became a scandal, with Bill, with Bill Cosby, he was this moral guy. He was this like ethics guy. And he wore sweaters and-

Brendan Schaub 32:00 America's dad.

Joe Rogan 32:01 ... he was America's dad. And to find out that that guy was drugging and raping women... He's in fucking jail right now, which is crazy, right?

Brendan Schaub 32:10 He's gonna die, I give it, what are you, over/under a week? Do you think it's-

Joe Rogan 32:14 You think so?

Brendan Schaub 32:14 ... the way it goes with those old dudes.

Joe Rogan 32:16 Really?

Brendan Schaub 32:16 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 32:16 He's 81.

Brendan Schaub 32:18 His eyes are so crazy.

Joe Rogan 32:19 He can't see.

Brendan Schaub 32:20 I think the one's good. But the left-

Joe Rogan 32:23 They are? I think-

Brendan Schaub 32:23 ... one's all over the goddamn place.

Joe Rogan 32:24 Which one is the one? I thought the right one was wider.

Brendan Schaub 32:27 Uh, it, it, I think it's this one, but it is fucking-

Joe Rogan 32:30 Yeah, it's looking the wrong way.

Brendan Schaub 32:31 ... completely essential. Yeah, it's like-

Joe Rogan 32:32 It's kinda... It's going on its own way.

Brendan Schaub 32:34 Yeah, that's what you get, man. (laughs) It's-

Joe Rogan 32:36 Yeah. I mean-

Brendan Schaub 32:36 He's gonna die any day now.

Joe Rogan 32:37 I think, um, I think a, a path to redemption or a path to retribution would be, uh, would be good, a path to forgiveness. That's, that's a thing that's important for all, all human beings who've made mistakes. We, we can't just-

Brendan Schaub 32:54 I think it's important-

Joe Rogan 32:55 ... cast people out if they've made mistakes.

Brendan Schaub 32:57 Agree. I also think it's important too with all this stuff is like Louis C.K. got lumped in with the big dogs like Bill Cosby and Harvey Weinstein, then there's Louis C.K.

Joe Rogan 33:06 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 33:06 And, man, there is definitely different levels to this.

Joe Rogan 33:10 Yes.

Brendan Schaub 33:10 These fucking crimes.

Joe Rogan 33:11 No question. No question.

Brendan Schaub 33:13 How about m-... One that flies under the radar, especially here in America, and I was just reading about it, how true it is, who knows, is w- with Ronaldo, who, you know, in soccer, ask, ask your boy, uh, Ian, Ian Edwards. I mean, there's, there's-

Joe Rogan 33:25 He's a super superstar.

Brendan Schaub 33:27 ... superstar. It would be like, uh, it'd basically be like Conor McGregor getting caught doing something for... in our world.

Joe Rogan 33:32 He's also a new one, right?

Brendan Schaub 33:32 You know, like it's a big deal.

Joe Rogan 33:34 This is-

Brendan Schaub 33:34 It's a new one, yeah. This, this girl, you know, he said, she said, uh, he kept telling him no and then he anally raped her, and then, uh, paid her, uh, $375,000 to keep quiet. Now she's coming back out.

Joe Rogan 33:48 (sighs)

Brendan Schaub 33:48 But who knows?

Joe Rogan 33:49 Human beings. We're capable of such amazing things and such fucking awful things.

Brendan Schaub 33:56 Might have to look that up, Jamie. I might have been drained.

Joe Rogan 33:58 Yeah. No, I think you're right about that. Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 34:00 My brother told me about it. He's usually on it.

Joe Rogan 34:01 That's what I just read in the New York Post. Yeah, we should probably go back to fights, right?

Brendan Schaub 34:06 Ronaldo likes that booty. Uh, yeah, we should go back to fights.

Joe Rogan 34:09 Literally.

Brendan Schaub 34:09 Sorry, I don't know how we got that... Hmm.

Joe Rogan 34:13 Um-

Brendan Schaub 34:13 Dude, how excited are you about your, your special being dropped today? Nervous at all?

Joe Rogan 34:16 I was nervous before, yeah.

Brendan Schaub 34:17 Oh, are you nervous about it?

Joe Rogan 34:18 Um, yeah, I mean I care-

Brendan Schaub 34:19 Because the body of work you've been doing forever.

Joe Rogan 34:20 ... cared about it. I worked on it for two-

Brendan Schaub 34:23 Fuck yeah.

Joe Rogan 34:23 ... fucking years, you know? But-

Brendan Schaub 34:24 And you edited it yourself.

Joe Rogan 34:26 Re- reviews are awesome. Came out great.

Brendan Schaub 34:27 I heard it's great.

Joe Rogan 34:28 I'm excited. You know, it's the best... I think the best one I've ever done. I really do. I think the last one, I think Triggered was the best one, and I think this one's better than that.

Brendan Schaub 34:36 That's how it should go, right?

Joe Rogan 34:37 Yeah, I mean, that's how it should go. Just keep working, keep, keep, uh, trying to refine it, and keep, uh, uh, you know, raise my standards. I learned some stuff. Still, out of all these years doing standup, I'm still learning. I learned some stuff in the editing process.

Brendan Schaub 34:51 Really?

Joe Rogan 34:52 Yeah. Well, I learned some stuff just watching. I think I, I re- I listen to recordings all the time, um, but I think I'm gonna step my game up now. And after talking to Bert Kreischer yesterday, Bert, uh, he records audio and he also records video, and I think I'm going to start recording video of all my shows too now.

Brendan Schaub 35:09 It's tough. Oh, well, yeah, because when you're doing these giant theaters, so there's not video. 'Cause like-

Joe Rogan 35:15 Terrible.

Brendan Schaub 35:15 ... when I was at Parlor or wherever I go, they usually have video capability, so I get all the video.

Joe Rogan 35:18 That's nice.

Brendan Schaub 35:19 Always get the video.

Joe Rogan 35:20 Well, the Icehouse can do that for me.

Brendan Schaub 35:21 That's true.

Joe Rogan 35:22 And, you know, I can, I could definitely get someone to do that for me at the store, but I just think it's critical to see the way you move as well as hear. Like you gotta analyze all that shit and try to figure out what... You gotta be natural and in the moment, but you also gotta analyze all the particulars and find out like what... Like I'll, I would watch like two or three different sets 'cause I film four shows, and I was like, "Why did I, why didn't I do that in the second show? Huh."

Brendan Schaub 35:47 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 35:47 Like, "The way I did it there, that's the way to do it."

Brendan Schaub 35:49 Yep.

Joe Rogan 35:49 "But I did it differently in this other show."

Brendan Schaub 35:52 I think the shitty part's watching yourself and listening to yourself.

Joe Rogan 35:55 Ugh.

Brendan Schaub 35:55 It takes a real type of asshole to do that.

Joe Rogan 35:58 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 35:58 Right? It's the worst.

Joe Rogan 35:59 But it takes a real type of asshole to like it.

Brendan Schaub 36:01 Oh, to then just be like, "Oh, that was good."

Joe Rogan 36:03 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 36:03 And it's you. "Well, it's pretty good."

Joe Rogan 36:05 Have you ever been over someone's house and they make you wa- they make you watch something that they did?

Brendan Schaub 36:09 Dude.

Joe Rogan 36:11 Oh.

Brendan Schaub 36:12 This, this quarterback, Vinny Testaverde, who's a, he was a first round draft pick. He played forever. We went to his house and he made me watch the recap of his last football season.

Joe Rogan 36:23 No.

Brendan Schaub 36:23 A two-hour NFL Films recap of the Baltimore Ravens, and it was a nightmare.

Joe Rogan 36:28 He made you watch a recap?

Brendan Schaub 36:29 He made all of us sit there and, dude, it was so boring.

Joe Rogan 36:32 Shut the fuck up.

Brendan Schaub 36:33 I promise, I, I wanted to put a fucking bullet through my head.

Joe Rogan 36:36 Come on.

Brendan Schaub 36:37 But out of the respect of Vinny Testaverde, and he beat my ass in basketball before that, I stayed there and watched it.

Joe Rogan 36:42 (sighs)

Brendan Schaub 36:43 Who does that though?

Joe Rogan 36:45 Mm.... I heard about a dude who, um, he had a party over at his house and then when the people were over there, he made them listen to him sing a song.

Brendan Schaub 36:54 Was it Bryan Callen?

Joe Rogan 36:55 Nope.

Guest 36:56 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 36:56 Just kidding.

Joe Rogan 36:57 Some other guy.

Brendan Schaub 36:58 No, I'm, I'm, I know who you're talking about 'cause I think I was there.

Joe Rogan 37:01 He played, he played music and sang and was serious.

Brendan Schaub 37:05 During the middle of the Super Bowl, sir. Put the Super Bowl on pause and his band struck up a fucking song.

Joe Rogan 37:12 (gasps)

Brendan Schaub 37:12 I looked around and went, "Is everyone a terrorist here?"

Joe Rogan 37:16 Oh, my God. (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 37:16 "What the fuck is happening?"

Joe Rogan 37:18 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 37:18 Why is the game paused? I'm from Denver, Colorado.

Joe Rogan 37:21 Oh, my God.

Brendan Schaub 37:22 If you don't put that goddamn drumstick down, I'm gonna frip the, flip the fuck out.

Joe Rogan 37:26 Oh.

Brendan Schaub 37:27 This, that was the most Hollywood thing I've ever seen in my life. I went, "Oh, I feel sick and I'm gonna leave now."

Joe Rogan 37:32 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 37:32 "I feel very sick." In the middle of the fucking game, man. My Broncos were playing, too. Oh, dude.

Joe Rogan 37:37 People are, people are so strange, man.

Brendan Schaub 37:40 Like, "What the fuck?" That's the most Hollywood thing I've ever seen in my life. Where I, where I felt sick.

Joe Rogan 37:47 Yeah. I've seen many of those. I was over someone's house once and this guy ran outside to his car to get a, uh-

Brendan Schaub 37:54 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 37:55 ... a video to get us to watch, a music video that he did was, which was one of the worst songs I've ever heard in my life.

Brendan Schaub 38:01 People like Gray.

Joe Rogan 38:02 And it was a music video, and it was a music video that looked like it was made for about $3.

Brendan Schaub 38:06 Oh, God.

Joe Rogan 38:07 I was just like, "What the fuck?" And he's, like, singing all sincere in this music video and we're all sitting around like we have to watch.

Brendan Schaub 38:12 Like, "What the fuck?"

Joe Rogan 38:13 It's torture, just compressing my chest in a vice. I'm like, "I can't breathe!"

Brendan Schaub 38:19 But you might've seen comics, like, play their hour special when they've had people over.

Joe Rogan 38:23 I haven't seen that yet, but I'm sure it's happened.

Brendan Schaub 38:24 That's happening right now as we speak.

Joe Rogan 38:26 Right now, there's guys-

Brendan Schaub 38:27 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 38:27 ... like, "Come on, everybody sit down, sit down. It's time for my special."

Brendan Schaub 38:29 "Come on, everyone get around."

Joe Rogan 38:30 "Yeah. All right. Yeah." At every premiere.

Brendan Schaub 38:35 All right, we should probably talk fighting though.

Joe Rogan 38:35 What is you laughing at? Bert. Bert did that?

Brendan Schaub 38:38 Bert Kreischer did that? (laughs)

Joe Rogan 38:40 No, he did that with his family, though.

Guest 38:41 Yeah, he did that with family.

Joe Rogan 38:41 They had, like, a screening. No, but they had, like, a specifically-

Guest 38:44 Nah.

Brendan Schaub 38:44 Was it friends and f- was... It's friends, too?

Joe Rogan 38:46 Yeah, but he... No, no, no. That's...

Brendan Schaub 38:48 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 38:49 I hear you, but this is a different thing. Like, he invited them to a screening of his special, where... That was the purpose. It wasn't like he threw it on in the middle of a party.

Guest 38:59 Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Joe Rogan 38:59 "Everybody sit down, sit down."

Brendan Schaub 39:00 Not like that.

Guest 39:00 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 39:00 "Time to watch my special."

Brendan Schaub 39:01 Yeah, I feel that way.

Joe Rogan 39:02 Like, you know...

Guest 39:02 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 39:02 (laughs) Yeah.

Guest 39:02 ... a little weird.

Joe Rogan 39:02 "Bert, I'm enjoying the music and I got pizza here."

Brendan Schaub 39:05 Yeah, it's a little different.

Joe Rogan 39:05 Yeah, it's different.

Guest 39:06 Yeah, I like that, yeah.

Joe Rogan 39:07 No, it was a screening and his agents were there and his managers were there and people that-

Brendan Schaub 39:11 People-

Joe Rogan 39:11 ... worked at his...

Brendan Schaub 39:12 Do you have, uh, family come to your... Shooting your specials?

Joe Rogan 39:15 No. Me neither.

Brendan Schaub 39:18 I'm like, "I don't like them at the show." Yeah.

Joe Rogan 39:18 No, no, no, no. My... You know, if someone from my family comes and watches me, I mean, they come to a show, you know?

Brendan Schaub 39:26 Yeah, but they're not coming to the shooting of your special.

Joe Rogan 39:28 And I don't ever ask them to. Like, if they want to, that's fine.

Brendan Schaub 39:31 Like, but does your wife like to go? If she's like-

Joe Rogan 39:33 Sometimes. She, I, I have her come out, like, every six months or so.

Brendan Schaub 39:37 Just to see.

Joe Rogan 39:38 Just to see. Like, "Tell me, tell me w- is anything new? Like, what, what's, what's different?"

Brendan Schaub 39:43 'Cause she's known you for-

Joe Rogan 39:44 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 39:44 ... so long, she would know.

Joe Rogan 39:46 So it's like... It's like... Yeah, if someone's... Here's the thing, if someone sees you every weekend, and I have friends that take their girlfriends on the road with them, and they get so bored with their act. (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 39:58 Oh, dude.

Joe Rogan 39:58 'Cause they're watching a guy perform every night. Two nights, uh, in a row, two shows in a night. They fucking... Your act is nonsense to them.

Brendan Schaub 40:08 Dude, I'm...

Joe Rogan 40:09 It's ...

Narrator 40:09 (babbling)

Brendan Schaub 40:10 You're one of my favorite people on planet Earth. I don't have to come store all the time. I've seen, you know, your set when you were getting ready for this a bunch of times. And when I was leaving, someone's like, "Can I watch Joe?" I'm like, "Dude, I've seen it, man." It's not disrespectful.

Joe Rogan 40:19 Yeah. He didn't want to go.

Brendan Schaub 40:19 He understands. I've fu-... I've seen it, though.

Joe Rogan 40:22 I don't even watch, like...

Brendan Schaub 40:23 Seen it 10 times.

Joe Rogan 40:24 I don't even watch my favorites. Like, even Joey, I'll sometimes leave the room if he's on stage.

Brendan Schaub 40:29 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 40:29 Yeah, you don't... You, you also don't want to get bored with someone's act. You can't watch them over and over and over and over and over again. But that's what happens with girlfriends. Girlfriends that go on the road with guys, they're watching two sets a night.

Brendan Schaub 40:41 What a terrible idea, though.

Joe Rogan 40:43 Ugh. Thursday, Friday, Saturday, blah. And then they just think you suck.

Brendan Schaub 40:49 (laughs)

Joe Rogan 40:49 'Cause you don't make them laugh anymore.

Brendan Schaub 40:51 Yeah, they're just over it. They're like-

Joe Rogan 40:52 Right.

Brendan Schaub 40:52 ... "Really? This is what you do? You tell the same story every night?"

Joe Rogan 40:55 Yeah. (laughs) You pretend you don't-

Brendan Schaub 40:56 "Shut up, bitch."

Joe Rogan 40:57 You pretend it's a new story and then, uh, if you have a new opening act, you're like-

Brendan Schaub 41:00 You, like...

Joe Rogan 41:00 ... "He's really funny." Like, "He's funny. What about me?"

Brendan Schaub 41:03 He's funny, yeah.

Joe Rogan 41:04 "Oh, I've seen you too many times." Like, "Oh, no."

Brendan Schaub 41:07 Yeah, my brother used to think I was great, but he was on the road with me every time and the other night goes-

Joe Rogan 41:11 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 41:11 ... "Here we go again." He goes, "I feel like I could do your act now."

Joe Rogan 41:13 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 41:13 I'm like, "Motherfucker."

Joe Rogan 41:15 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 41:15 He's seen it-

Joe Rogan 41:16 He probably could.

Brendan Schaub 41:16 Probably could. He sees it... He probably knows it by heart.

Joe Rogan 41:17 He probably could.

Brendan Schaub 41:18 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 41:18 We used to do that in Boston. We had a thing called Joe Biden Night at Stitches and Joe, Joe Biden, who was the former vice president-

Brendan Schaub 41:26 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 41:26 People don't remember this, but in 1988 when he was running for president, he got busted retelling some of Kennedy's old speeches.

Brendan Schaub 41:37 (laughs) Come on, man.

Joe Rogan 41:38 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 41:38 This is in '88?

Joe Rogan 41:39 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 41:39 Come on.

Joe Rogan 41:40 It was a big scandal. So we, uh... And that kinda took him out of the running for being president for a long time.

Brendan Schaub 41:46 Yeah, can't believe it.

Joe Rogan 41:46 Although, they're talking about it again for 2020. But he, um... So we would do Joe Biden Night at the Comedy Store.

Brendan Schaub 41:54 That's hilarious.

Joe Rogan 41:54 Where, like, I would do your act and, like-

Brendan Schaub 41:55 That's awesome. That's hilarious.

Joe Rogan 41:58 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 41:58 People probably loved it.

Joe Rogan 41:59 Oh, they loved it. It was, you know, like, an off night. It's, like, a Monday.

Brendan Schaub 42:02 Like you doing Joey Diaz?

Joe Rogan 42:04 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Brendan Schaub 42:04 You're fucking great.

Joe Rogan 42:05 Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Well, that would be good because I can do an impression of Joey.

Brendan Schaub 42:07 I know.

Joe Rogan 42:08 But, like, a lot of it was just people just doing the material, you know?

Brendan Schaub 42:10 Chris D'Elia does Callen?

Joe Rogan 42:11 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 42:12 He's fucking great.

Joe Rogan 42:14 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, comedy's a weird thing. You know, you, you do it too many... I mean, that's one of the things about this special. It's like, I got too close to it, you know? Like, when you're editing things and you're practicing it and you're doing it over and over again, I know it's working. I know I go to a cli-... I know it's gonna work. I'm, uh, it's polished. I've practiced it, I wrote it out, I redid it, I fucking edited it and changed it and twisted it and I know how to do it. But I also don't wanna hear it. Like, I've never-

Brendan Schaub 42:41 No.

Joe Rogan 42:41 ... I've heard it too many times, so... You get too close to it, so then when people are gonna see it for the very first time, you're like, "I don't know."

Brendan Schaub 42:48 Like, ugh, this is gonna go.

Joe Rogan 42:49 I don't know, I hope they like it. I just, I came too close to it. I, I lost it.

Brendan Schaub 42:52 But you still get nervous, even after all these years.

Joe Rogan 42:54 Yes. If you care, you get nervous.

Brendan Schaub 42:56 And it, isn't it, it's your, you're so close to this body of work. Like you said, this is your baby.

Joe Rogan 43:00 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 43:00 You know what I'm saying? If someone's like, "Dude, that sucked." You're like, "Motherfucker."

Joe Rogan 43:05 Y- y- there's definitely people that are gonna think it sucks. That's always gonna happen. But my thing is the majority of my fans who like my comedy, I want them to like it.

Brendan Schaub 43:14 Correct.

Joe Rogan 43:15 And so for me, it's like I was confident. I knew I did everything I could do. I knew, I know I'm a good comic, and I know I've done everything I could do to make this my best one. So I knew, I was confident, I knew it was a good special, and I thought it was my best special. I'm p- m- very confident that it's my best special. But it's still, (door shutting) I'm too close to it, so I don't know. It's like, anyway.

Brendan Schaub 43:38 You gotta take a couple swings.

Joe Rogan 43:39 Conor McGregor versus Khabib this weekend.

Brendan Schaub 43:39 Anyways, Conor McGregor, yeah. (laughs)

Joe Rogan 43:42 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 43:42 Well, it's a good transition. Uh, I, I'll tell you this.

Joe Rogan 43:44 This weekend, boys.

Brendan Schaub 43:45 Dude, I'll tell you this. I'm not being a hater, I'm not being, uh, some sort of Debbie Downer. I don't think it breaks two million pay-per-view buys.

Joe Rogan 43:54 You might be right.

Brendan Schaub 43:54 I'm, I'm not, I'm not seeing it, man. Like, when Conor fought Florida- Floyd or when Conor, uh, Nate Diaz 2, I couldn't go anywhere without hearing about it.

Joe Rogan 44:02 Not Starbucks, you name ... Anywhere. Shoe store, where ... Car dealer. Everyone went, "Dude, Conor-Floyd, who you got, man?" Everybody and their mom. Now, very rare. Well-

Brendan Schaub 44:13 Maybe on one of my shows someone will bring it up, but ...

Joe Rogan 44:15 There's something that Conor didn't want to do for this fight, and that's massive promotion.

Brendan Schaub 44:19 Yeah, but the ... So does that mean it's not as big? Like, who's that following? Is that Conor or the UFC? You know?

Joe Rogan 44:24 Conor.

Brendan Schaub 44:24 It's both.

Joe Rogan 44:25 He doesn't want to do it. Well, the, the UFC has a model, right? And it worked in the Jose Aldo fight. That model is you just promote the holy fuck out of a fight. You travel the world, you promote the shit out of it, you scream at each other at press conferences, you do all that stuff for months and months and months, and those things sell like crazy.

Brendan Schaub 44:43 If it's Conor McGregor.

Joe Rogan 44:44 If it's Conor McGregor.

Brendan Schaub 44:45 So, the-

Joe Rogan 44:45 But who have they ever done it with besides Conor McGregor like that?

Brendan Schaub 44:49 (sighs) No one really sells like that. They, you know, a little bit with Ronda, I guess, but she didn't have the same kind of chops as Conor. So Conor's the only one, but, you know, I, I don't know. Maybe it's 'cause he had a layoff, maybe it's after the Floyd thing. I think it does well. I don't think it breaks, uh, uh, Conor verse Nate 2.

Joe Rogan 45:06 Well-

Brendan Schaub 45:06 I don't, I don't think it breaks 1.6 million.

Joe Rogan 45:08 What I think happened was Conor made 100 fucking million dollars and he was like, "Yeah, um, I'm just gonna train."

Brendan Schaub 45:15 You know what I think? I think th- there's that and it also goes, I'm not ... That took so much energy to do all that and, and everyone knows me as that guy. I have the toughest fight of my life coming up. I'm taking every precaution necessary not to overtrain, not to use all my energy. This, I'm in the fight of my life and I'm gonna train like it, I'm shutting down everything. You can post a fucking ... Me throwing the dolly through the window 1,000 times. I'll do the press conference on Thursday. Other than that, man, I have got to get ready for the fight of my life.

Joe Rogan 45:45 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 45:45 That's the way I'm looking at it.

Joe Rogan 45:46 I think you're right, and I think this is the fight of his life. I think stylistically it's a nightmare matchup.

Brendan Schaub 45:51 I think it's a nightmare matchup for both of them.

Joe Rogan 45:53 Both of them.

Brendan Schaub 45:53 I think anyone who goes, "Oh, Conor, you know, he can't wrestle, he can't do this. He's just going to get taken down and pounded out," you're so off, it's not even funny.

Joe Rogan 46:01 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 46:01 You don't know the game, man.

Joe Rogan 46:02 He absolutely is capable of stuffing a takedown or two in the early going. That's what's up. Because in the early going, he's got that stinger of a left hand. And if he-

Brendan Schaub 46:13 His foot, his movement, his footwork.

Joe Rogan 46:14 His movement, his footwork, and Khabib is gonna know that coming in. He's gonna be a little hesi- He's not gonna walk towards him like Edson Barboza did, or he did in the Edson Barboza fight.

Brendan Schaub 46:24 He can't.

Joe Rogan 46:24 Because Barboza is mostly kicks. Barboza throws a lot of kicks.

Brendan Schaub 46:29 Thai style.

Joe Rogan 46:29 A lot of Thai style kicks. And Khabib just put a tremendous amount of pressure on him and then got ahold of him. But Conor's gonna crack him with hands, and his footwork is way better.

Brendan Schaub 46:39 Yes.

Joe Rogan 46:39 He's, he's, he's just way better at moving in and moving out.

Brendan Schaub 46:43 I, I think when people go, "Oh, it's either Conor starches him and gets the KO" or "Khabib just takes him down for five rounds and pounds him out." I think, uh, I think it's a, it's a classic fight. I think it's back and forth. I think it's a fucking dogfight.

Joe Rogan 46:55 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 46:56 I think it's a fight of our lives, man. I, I really do.

Joe Rogan 46:58 I think you're probably right. I, I-

Brendan Schaub 46:59 I think you, I think you're getting a fucking great fight from two guys where there's more on the line than just win or lose.

Joe Rogan 47:06 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 47:06 I think with Khabib and what he represents, and, uh, talking to his team, his team captain, Josh Thompson, he goes, "Khabib's gonna retire after this."

Joe Rogan 47:13 Really?

Brendan Schaub 47:14 He wants to beat Conor and retire.

Joe Rogan 47:16 Really?

Brendan Schaub 47:16 He wants to retire like the Floyd Mayweather of, of MMA. 27-0, beat the, beat the UFC's, you know, poster boy and he walks off in the sunset. Unless they get him a super fight with GSP or something, he's done.

Joe Rogan 47:28 Really? Wow, that's shocking. He's young.

Brendan Schaub 47:33 Very shocking. He's, but think how long he's been doing this.

Joe Rogan 47:35 Yeah. His whole life.

Brendan Schaub 47:35 I think since he's four he's been fucking up grizzly bears.

Joe Rogan 47:38 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 47:38 So he's like, "All right, I'm over this, man." And not to mention, he lives with his family, man. He still lives with his mom and dad, his wife, and his two kids, same house.

Joe Rogan 47:45 Wow.

Brendan Schaub 47:46 That's what kind of monster you're dealing with. And then for Conor, I think it's, it's a legacy fight where, you know, he- he's coming off the Floyd Mayweather kind of train there where, you know, it was a success either way you look at it. He made $100 million and he competed against the best of all time and lasted more rounds than anyone thought. And trained for a complete boxing match, so his striking's gonna be better going into this fight. But for him, it's not about the money. You see him ... The one interview he's done, uh, on Mac Life, the, d- you can see it. It's like, it's vintage Conor real. Oh shit, we, we got one here, man. This isn't ... You know, the Floyd Mayweather's more of a show, like, you know, we didn't think he was gonna win that.

Joe Rogan 48:22 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 48:22 This one, you look at it, oh shit, that's vintage Conor. This motherfucker's coming to fight. And he might get taken down. Yes, I guarantee you he gets taken down. But that motherfucker's gonna get back up. He's gonna get up, and he's gonna keep getting up, and Khabib's gonna keep coming. And we got a dogfight, man. I think both guys are gonna be fucked up after this fight and it's gonna be a classic.

Joe Rogan 48:38 It could be, or-

Brendan Schaub 48:39 Fast-forward, fucking j- just Khabib gets starched in seven seconds. People are just gonna be playing this on a loop.

Joe Rogan 48:46 It could be that, too. (laughs) Just playing this on a loop. (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 48:48 Look, Khabib's gotta get through the fire, you know? He's gotta get through the fire in the early going. He's gotta close that distance and he's gotta do it-

Joe Rogan 48:55 ... with precision, without letting his nerves affect him, right? I mean, he's got a- all this shit-talking Conor's done to him, you seen him rattled at the press conference.

Brendan Schaub 49:04 He's rattled. When he started talking about his dad, he's rattled.

Joe Rogan 49:06 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 49:06 And I think, um, we've, we've also never seen Khabib fight with high stakes.

Joe Rogan 49:11 Right.

Brendan Schaub 49:11 Like, when he fought Al Iaquinta, that wasn't high stakes. Al's an amazing fighter, but that's not the same as fighting Conor McGregor.

Joe Rogan 49:16 Right.

Brendan Schaub 49:16 When he's fighting, uh, Edson Barboza, that's not high stakes. When you're fighting Conor McGregor, Conor takes all the chips on that poker table, puts it all in the middle and goes, "I'm all in. You have to be all in. (claps hands) I do well under these circumstances. How do you respond?"

Joe Rogan 49:30 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 49:31 So, for, we've never seen Khabib, and everyone goes, "Oh, his cardio's great." It is great, but when the fucking, th- uh, that Irish nation is rocking that fucking arena and there's all this pressure, his heart rate's gonna go up. And he's gonna be like, "God, I fucking hate this guy." Khabib's never fought a guy who he hates. He hates Conor.

Joe Rogan 49:49 Yep.

Brendan Schaub 49:49 How, is he gonna be overzealous and open himself up?

Joe Rogan 49:52 Yep.

Brendan Schaub 49:53 There has to be something there and we-

Joe Rogan 49:54 Like Aldo.

Brendan Schaub 49:54 ... we don't know. Ex- exactly, like Aldo.

Joe Rogan 49:56 Aldo was an assassin until that fight. People forget.

Brendan Schaub 49:57 Completely. One of the best of all time.

Joe Rogan 49:59 Yeah. Still is. But that, that fight exposed how good Conor's psychological game is. Because months and months of being on tour with Conor, those press conferences, Conor stealing his belt and screaming at him and getting in his face, and then starches him with one punch.

Brendan Schaub 50:15 Oh.

Joe Rogan 50:15 Amazing.

Brendan Schaub 50:16 But the, what, the, what, what else is interesting is remember, Conor is an amazing counter-puncher. Well, to be an amazing counter-puncher, you need a guy to punch at you.

Joe Rogan 50:24 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 50:25 Khabib's not gonna punch at him.

Joe Rogan 50:26 Right.

Brendan Schaub 50:27 Unless it becomes an ego thing like he did with, uh, Al or Edson Barboza where he just walked them down, there's no respect. He might throw some punches, so it's gonna be interesting for Conor to find those angles when the guy's not playing the game.

Joe Rogan 50:38 Well, it's also Khabib has had a history of struggling to make weight. Th- he cannot struggle to make weight for this fight.

Brendan Schaub 50:44 He-

Joe Rogan 50:44 He's got to be on point.

Brendan Schaub 50:45 He came into that press conference at 174. They said this motherfucker started camp at 180 something. Like, he's, he's never been more serious for a fight.

Joe Rogan 50:54 Which for people listening, if you're saying like, "Well, but he fights at 155." He used to weigh 200.

Brendan Schaub 50:59 Two hundo, yeah.

Joe Rogan 51:00 Yeah, and then get down to 155, and it was not good. I mean, the Michael Johnson fight, he struggled. He had like some real shutdown issues. And then the Tony Ferguson fight, they pulled him out of the fight. He can't have any of that nonsense this weekend.

Brendan Schaub 51:12 Oh, no. I don't think will though.

Joe Rogan 51:14 This, this weekend's gotta be on point.

Brendan Schaub 51:14 The, the, the, the nonsense, the only thing where, like Jamie Tony's going to the fight, I would never go to this fight. I think there's-

Joe Rogan 51:20 What?

Brendan Schaub 51:20 I would not go this fight for this reason, I'm a, a complete pussy.

Joe Rogan 51:24 What?

Brendan Schaub 51:24 I think something's gonna happen in the crowd between the Russians and the Irish. I think that this-

Joe Rogan 51:27 Why do you think that?

Brendan Schaub 51:28 Just the animosity between the two, they hate each other so bad. If this fight happens for Conor, you're gonna have upset Russians. If it happens for Khabib, you're gonna have upset fucking Irish. I th- I think it, it's g- it's gotten bigger than just a UFC fight.

Joe Rogan 51:42 Really?

Brendan Schaub 51:43 I do, man.

Joe Rogan 51:43 So you don't-

Brendan Schaub 51:44 It's so hostile.

Joe Rogan 51:45 You think you wouldn't go to this fight because the potential the violence breaks out?

Brendan Schaub 51:49 Correct.

Joe Rogan 51:50 Wow.

Brendan Schaub 51:50 I also don't like going to UFC fights. I also don't like going to UFC fights, but-

Joe Rogan 51:54 Why don't you like it? Because you used to fight?

Brendan Schaub 51:55 It's just stressful for me. I just, it, yeah, just super stressful for me.

Joe Rogan 51:58 Do you feel like you're gonna fight again when you're there?

Brendan Schaub 52:00 Yeah, I get the nerves and I'm just like, "Oh, God."

Joe Rogan 52:02 Ugh.

Brendan Schaub 52:02 I, I go ch- complete opposite of that now, I try to get more relaxed when, you know, when I'm doing standups. I, I go, I-

Joe Rogan 52:07 Right.

Brendan Schaub 52:07 I don't want to be in that scared mode anymore.

Joe Rogan 52:09 Yeah, that's interesting.

Brendan Schaub 52:11 And my heart rate under sweating the whole time.

Joe Rogan 52:13 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 52:14 I'm just like around, like, sweating. I look like shit.

Joe Rogan 52:16 Ah. Pull up that card. Let me see the rest of the card.

Brendan Schaub 52:20 Dude, if you're Tony Ferguson, it's like, "Oh, yeah, and Tony's fighting."

Joe Rogan 52:24 Right.

Brendan Schaub 52:24 It's-

Joe Rogan 52:24 I know, and he's fighting Pettis.

Brendan Schaub 52:26 It's not an easy fight for a comeback fight for Tony.

Joe Rogan 52:28 No. I mean, I'm just amazed that he's able to fight again so quickly after knee surgery.

Brendan Schaub 52:33 You know what's interesting to me is I, I asked Josh Thompson, who knows Khabib and obviously you can talk to DC about it, but they, I go, "Dude, Tony's back. Like, if Khabib were to win, he would fight Tony, right?" And he goes, "No interest." Th- that fight does nothing to him mentally, he just doesn't care about it. I'm like, (sighs)

Joe Rogan 52:48 Khabib just doesn't care?

Brendan Schaub 52:49 Yeah, he's like, "Not with Tony."

Joe Rogan 52:50 So he really just wants to fight Conor and then get out.

Brendan Schaub 52:53 Get out, wants to, wants to beat-

Joe Rogan 52:54 Or fight GSP.

Brendan Schaub 52:55 F- from, from, this is from Josh Thompson's mouth, from Khabib, he wants to beat the UFC's poster boy, Dana's poster boy and walk the fuck out.

Joe Rogan 53:03 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 53:03 Unless they give him a super fight.

Joe Rogan 53:05 Who the fuck has ever been 26 and 0 as a champion?

Brendan Schaub 53:09 Now that-

Joe Rogan 53:09 I think that's the only one.

Brendan Schaub 53:11 Yeah, but 26 and 0 for sure he's fucking fighting Dagostinis.

Joe Rogan 53:13 Who else has been an undefeated champion?

Brendan Schaub 53:16 Undefeated champion?

Joe Rogan 53:17 Jon Jones.

Brendan Schaub 53:17 Well, Con- Conor was undefeated.

Joe Rogan 53:18 But Jon Jones, did he fight-

Brendan Schaub 53:19 Well, no, he didn't.

Joe Rogan 53:19 ... Matt Hamill before he won the title?

Brendan Schaub 53:22 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 53:22 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 53:22 He fought Matt Hamill in the Ultimate Fighter.

Joe Rogan 53:23 That's who-

Brendan Schaub 53:24 Roy Nelson, Brendan Schaub.

Joe Rogan 53:25 No, no, no. It wasn't The-

Brendan Schaub 53:26 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 53:26 ... Ultimate Fighter.

Brendan Schaub 53:26 Yeah, it was Ultimate Fighter Finale, 'cause I fought Roy Nelson-

Joe Rogan 53:29 Oh. Oh. Oh.

Brendan Schaub 53:29 ... and Jon Jones fought Matt Hamill.

Joe Rogan 53:30 Right, not on the, not on The Ultimate Fighter though.

Brendan Schaub 53:32 No, you know, when they do the finale.

Joe Rogan 53:34 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, um, that's a bullshit loss though.

Brendan Schaub 53:38 Oh, my God. You, you got lost from whooping a dude's ass-

Joe Rogan 53:41 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 53:41 ... so bad.

Joe Rogan 53:42 He smashed him.

Brendan Schaub 53:42 They're like, "You know what?" Um, as far as undefeated champions...

Joe Rogan 53:46 Who? I don't think I, there's one.

Brendan Schaub 53:50 Rhe- Renan Barao.

Joe Rogan 53:52 Oh, he won, but he lost his first fight.

Brendan Schaub 53:55 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 53:55 Renan Barao lost his first ever UFC fight.

Brendan Schaub 53:57 But he was undefeated. Or, no, he was like-

Joe Rogan 53:58 And he-

Brendan Schaub 53:58 ... he had like 30 wins in a row or some shit-

Joe Rogan 54:00 Right.

Brendan Schaub 54:00 ... but had a weird loss back in Brazil.

Joe Rogan 54:02 Yeah, he lost his first MMA fight rather.

Brendan Schaub 54:04 Ronda.

Joe Rogan 54:06 Yeah, Ronda.

Brendan Schaub 54:06 Ronda was undefeated.

Joe Rogan 54:07 Undefeated.

Brendan Schaub 54:08 Yep.

Joe Rogan 54:08 Yeah. Yeah, Ronda's only two losses were the, the two title fights between Holly and Amanda. Let's see, what do you got there, Jamie? What are you pulling up?

Guest 54:17 List of undefeated MMA champions.

Brendan Schaub 54:20 (sighs) Ben Askren hanging around.

Joe Rogan 54:21 Yeah. Ben Askren's-

Guest 54:23 Brian Ortega.

Joe Rogan 54:23 ... for sure one of them. Put, Ben Askren to me, and I've, I've had him on the podcast, I've said this a hundred times.

Brendan Schaub 54:27 I know, I love the guy.

Joe Rogan 54:28 He's my... Oh, Brian Ortega. But Brian Ortega isn't really a champion.

Brendan Schaub 54:31 Well, these aren't champions, are they? These just u- undefeated MMA fighters though.

Joe Rogan 54:35 Oh.

Guest 54:35 Oh, sorry, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Brendan Schaub 54:36 Yeah, yeah.

Guest 54:37 Not 100% right.

Joe Rogan 54:37 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 54:37 These aren't champions.

Guest 54:38 Uh, type it one more time.

Brendan Schaub 54:39 Uh, Ben's the one guy who I'd love to see come out of retirement f- and, and fight Khabib.

Joe Rogan 54:43 (laughs) He's the one guy that's my biggest disappointment that that guy never fought in the UFC.

Brendan Schaub 54:47 Agreed. It's a fucking shame.

Joe Rogan 54:48 And, but the thing is, like, Khabib wouldn't f- I'm like, nobody knows who he is outside of the hardcore guys like you or myself.

Brendan Schaub 54:54 No, why would you fight him?

Joe Rogan 54:54 Why would you fight-

Brendan Schaub 54:54 Why would you fight-

Joe Rogan 54:55 ... him?

Brendan Schaub 54:55 ... and maybe lose? Maybe get out-wrestled? He, he, here's the only, if, if you're gonna say something about...Khabib, he's 27-0. He really... When you look at the body of work from Conor compared to Khabib, it's not even close. The, the wins that Conor has are remarkable.

Joe Rogan 55:09 Yes.

Brendan Schaub 55:09 You look the Max Holloway, Chad Mendes, Jose Aldo, and then-

Joe Rogan 55:12 What he did to Eddie Alvarez.

Brendan Schaub 55:13 I mean, ridiculous. Ridiculous.

Joe Rogan 55:14 That was ridiculous.

Brendan Schaub 55:15 Ridiculous.

Joe Rogan 55:16 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 55:16 The N- Nate Diaz win, Nate Diaz loss, like, you just look at the, the caliber of opponents that he's faced from a very young age-

Joe Rogan 55:23 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 55:23 ... it's a nightmare. Then you look at Khabib, he's 27-0. His biggest win's probably Barboza-

Joe Rogan 55:28 Joe- Joe Sanjos.

Brendan Schaub 55:29 ... de Sande Los when, when he was a little weathered, but-

Joe Rogan 55:31 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 55:31 ... you know. But Barboza e- is a perfect stylistic m- matchup for him.

Joe Rogan 55:35 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 55:36 So-

Joe Rogan 55:36 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 55:37 ... we, we, we don't know with Khabib. We, we know he's damn good, but how good?

Joe Rogan 55:40 He's had one weird moment in his entire career. That's-

Brendan Schaub 55:44 The-

Joe Rogan 55:44 ... again, Michael Johnson, when Michael Johnson cracked him. Wobbled him for a second and then took him down and smashed him.

Brendan Schaub 55:49 The Gleason, uh-

Joe Rogan 55:51 T-Bell?

Brendan Schaub 55:51 ... T-Bell fight got a little dicey too.

Joe Rogan 55:53 Did it?

Brendan Schaub 55:54 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 55:54 Oh. Boy, I don't remember that fight at all.

Brendan Schaub 55:56 Um, but, but with, with Michael Johnson, it's funny to me 'cause Michael Johnson landed that big, uh, overhand and p- p- people go, "Oh, Khabib has a weak chin." I'm like, "Well, well he's never been dropped. He's never been-"

Joe Rogan 56:08 Yeah, I mean he got cr-

Brendan Schaub 56:09 ... "he's never been sat on his ass ever."

Joe Rogan 56:09 Michael Johnson starched Dustin Poirier with one punch. F- don't forget about that. Michael Johnson can fucking punch.

Brendan Schaub 56:16 Yeah, he's explosive as shit.

Joe Rogan 56:18 Yeah, I mean he caught Khabib and Khabib got w- rocked for a second and then weathered the storm, took him down, smashed him. It was a total dominant performance. Yeah, if you look at his performance, like you look at his, rather, his resume, Pat Healy was a g- a tough fighter.

Brendan Schaub 56:34 Tough vet.

Joe Rogan 56:34 That, that showed. Abel Trujillo, he smashed Abel Trujillo.

Brendan Schaub 56:37 Remember, Abel, he took down more times than anyone inside that octagon.

Joe Rogan 56:40 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 56:40 21 town-

Joe Rogan 56:40 Wrecked all of them.

Brendan Schaub 56:41 ... times, I think.

Joe Rogan 56:41 Wrecked all of them.

Brendan Schaub 56:41 And he was a college wrestler.

Joe Rogan 56:43 Mm-hmm. And his, and a strong guy too.

Brendan Schaub 56:45 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 56:45 Abel's strong as shit.

Brendan Schaub 56:47 And that's Gleason, uh, T-Bell. When was that? 2012? That's-

Joe Rogan 56:51 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 56:52 ... that's that juicy T-Bell.

Joe Rogan 56:53 Yeah, the real big fight was the Barboza fight and then Al Iaquinta was, I mean, at is as last minute as last minute gets, and he still went five whole rounds with-

Brendan Schaub 57:03 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 57:03 ... Iaquinta.

Brendan Schaub 57:04 Mm-hmm.

Joe Rogan 57:04 Which was interesting for a lot of people. Like I talked to Eddie Alvarez after that fight and he was like, "Very interesting."

Brendan Schaub 57:11 (laughs) I love Eddie.

Joe Rogan 57:12 "Very interesting." Yeah. I was like, "This is a lot... You saw a lot of things in that fight, huh?" And he was like, "Yeah." He's like, uh, "You know, once the, once the fight got into the later rounds and he's still standing up with guys," you're like, "Oh, all right."

Brendan Schaub 57:23 It's so interesting to me 'cause when you talk to anyone from AKA, obviously they're super pro-Khabib, but they're like, "Dude, this isn't even a fight." Like this... What are you t- this is one of Khabib's easier fights. He's definitely had way tougher match ups." I'm like, "You're crazy, man."

Joe Rogan 57:36 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 57:36 They're like, "You should see Khabib go against Ed Ruth," who was a All-American Penn State wrestler. Like, "He fucks him up. He takes him down." I'm like-

Joe Rogan 57:43 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 57:43 ... "What?" But that's, you know, that's-

Joe Rogan 57:45 But that's wrestling.

Brendan Schaub 57:45 That's that wrestling, you know, that dance-

Joe Rogan 57:48 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 57:48 ... that rhythm.

Joe Rogan 57:49 Mm-hmm.

Brendan Schaub 57:49 Conor's not on that rhythm.

Joe Rogan 57:51 No.

Brendan Schaub 57:51 You're talking about a different animal.

Joe Rogan 57:53 You're talking about a guy who is one of the best fencers in the game, meaning can, like, uh, bu- jump in with one shot and put you out. And he can do it moving back, he can do it moving forward. He can time you and he'll, he'll be very calm in there. You will get the very best Conor McGregor.

Brendan Schaub 58:11 He's also no slouch on the ground. People think he's just going to get taken down and, like, get crucifixed right away.

Joe Rogan 58:16 Right.

Brendan Schaub 58:16 You're out your goddamn mind.

Joe Rogan 58:18 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 58:18 The guy trains with Dillon Danis. He's ch-

Joe Rogan 58:19 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 58:19 ... he's brought in these, uh, Dagestani wrestlers. Like, he's training with the elite of the elite. He's, he's... You know what Khabib's gonna do.

Joe Rogan 58:27 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 58:27 It's way easier to train for Khabib than it is Conor.

Joe Rogan 58:30 The dark horse fight on the card is Derrick Lewis and Volkov.

Brendan Schaub 58:33 That's a great fight.

Joe Rogan 58:34 Alexander Volkov might be the best heavyweight on the planet.

Brendan Schaub 58:37 (sighs) What'd he win, his last s- six-fight winning streak? He's a guy who's flying under the radar.

Joe Rogan 58:42 He's giant too.

Brendan Schaub 58:43 Knocked, uh... His last fight, he knocked out Werdum. People forget.

Joe Rogan 58:45 Yeah. Isn't he like 6'8" or some shit?

Brendan Schaub 58:47 He's... 6'8", yeah. 6'8".

Joe Rogan 58:49 Giant, tall, long dude who did real well in Bellator.

Brendan Schaub 58:53 World champion at Bellator.

Joe Rogan 58:54 Yep. And he has massive experience and you see him in that fight with Werdum, he fucked Werdum up.

Brendan Schaub 59:00 I know, man.

Joe Rogan 59:01 And, you know-

Brendan Schaub 59:01 He's a problem.

Joe Rogan 59:02 ... interesting, Werdum just released a, a statement saying that USADA asked him to snitch.

Brendan Schaub 59:07 I know. What's going on with the snitching stuff?

Joe Rogan 59:09 I don't know. They offered him, uh, a lean, more lenient sentence if he was willing to snitch and he goes, "Fuck you."

Brendan Schaub 59:16 I love Werdum.

Joe Rogan 59:17 I love that too.

Brendan Schaub 59:17 And Jon, and then I guess Jon was like, "Cool." (laughs)

Joe Rogan 59:20 (laughs) I don't know if Jon-

Brendan Schaub 59:21 I don't either.

Joe Rogan 59:22 I-

Brendan Schaub 59:22 But that's what they're saying. I don't either.

Joe Rogan 59:23 I didn't hear that Jon snitched. Did you hear Jon snitch?

Brendan Schaub 59:25 That's, that's, that's what the statement says.

Joe Rogan 59:28 But Jon's manager says that he didn't st- what statement from who?

Brendan Schaub 59:31 The statement from-

Joe Rogan 59:32 Did he just give you a hippo... (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 59:32 Come on, bro.

Joe Rogan 59:33 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 59:33 His manager?

Joe Rogan 59:34 Did he just give you a skeptic hippo face?

Brendan Schaub 59:36 Dude, s- but no, I'm not saying Jon did.

Joe Rogan 59:39 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 59:39 Let's be very clear. All I'm saying is he came out with that statement and then, uh, Malkin goes, "He didn't snitch." And then, uh-

Joe Rogan 59:46 Everybody's like, "Wait, what?" (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 59:47 ... Ne- Novitsky, Novitsky was like, "No, you said you were gonna give us some info to help us out down the road with other people." So, you know, I don't...

Joe Rogan 59:55 What?

Brendan Schaub 59:56 Yeah, the... USADA had to release an official statement went, "Hold on."

Joe Rogan 59:59 Wait a minute.

Brendan Schaub 1:00:00 Because Malkin came out and was like, "No, we never agreed and said we were gonna snitch." And then USADA's like, "Well, well, no, remember? Remember the contract you signed? Here's this section of the contract."

Joe Rogan 1:00:09 He s- they said they would help them out in the future with other people.

Brendan Schaub 1:00:14 I mean, but bring it up, Jamie, before I'm just-

Joe Rogan 1:00:16 Man, Jon Jones world champion walking around wearing a wire.

Brendan Schaub 1:00:19 Hey, guys, uh-

Joe Rogan 1:00:20 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 1:00:20 ... my creatine just ain't working.

Joe Rogan 1:00:21 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 1:00:21 God, everyone else, anyone else just exhausted today?

Joe Rogan 1:00:24 You guys are just so ripped, dude.

Brendan Schaub 1:00:25 You got anything?

Joe Rogan 1:00:25 What's your secret? (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 1:00:26 (laughs) You got anything, bro?

Joe Rogan 1:00:28 (laughs)

Brendan Schaub 1:00:28 Why are you in a full hoodie and sweatsuit in the sauna?

Joe Rogan 1:00:31 Yeah, I don't... Uh, you know, I'm gonna go out on a limb here. I don't think that Jon cheated.

Brendan Schaub 1:00:37 I don't e- uh... You don't think he cheated?

Joe Rogan 1:00:39 I don't. No.

Brendan Schaub 1:00:39 I don't know.

Joe Rogan 1:00:40 I don't.

Brendan Schaub 1:00:40 I don't know. It's very murky waters.

Joe Rogan 1:00:42 I, I might be wrong. I might be wrong. I don't think he cheated. I think he took something that was tainted. I think that's why they're only giving him a year off and I think... Look, I had said it on the podcast before-

Brendan Schaub 1:00:50 You don't have any skeptical hippo eyes about-

Joe Rogan 1:00:52 No.

Brendan Schaub 1:00:52 ... how it's shortened sentence, it's ready to go right around New York?

Joe Rogan 1:00:55 No.

Brendan Schaub 1:00:55 Right around the CSBN deal?

Jamie Vernon 1:00:57 This is the explanation sort of right here.

Joe Rogan 1:00:59 Mm. Malkin says, "There was none, but I keep saying that and everybody keeps running with it. Substantial assistance doesn't necessarily mean it has to be on somebody else. It could've been on himself."What?

Brendan Schaub 1:01:10 So go up to the part that USADA said.

Joe Rogan 1:01:12 This is their clarification right here.

Brendan Schaub 1:01:13 That's what USADA released, that statement.

Joe Rogan 1:01:15 Okay. USADA said, "There are two avenues," blah, blah, blah, "the anti-doping policy allow for a reduction of sanctions. One, an individual can get a sanction reduction if he or she provides information that results in USADA or another anti-doping agency bringing forward an anti-doping policy violation against other athletes or support personnel. And/or two, a reduction can be given if the information results in a criminal or disciplinary body bringing forward a criminal offense against individuals. Importantly, if the athlete or support personnel fails to continue to cooperate and provide credible substantial assistance, USADA will reinstate the original sanction." That's snitching.

Brendan Schaub 1:01:56 Where I come from, but I don't know. Now, I don't think Jon snitched on anyone to get a shorter sentence. We'll find out if Jackson guys are popping left and right all of a sudden, but I don't think Jon did that. I think that's just in there maybe.

Joe Rogan 1:02:10 Maybe.

Brendan Schaub 1:02:10 Or, or, if... I don't know.

Joe Rogan 1:02:12 Right.

Brendan Schaub 1:02:13 We- we do not know, and I like to give Jon Jones the benefit of the doubt. And I will say this, if I'm a UFC fighter, I am hiring Malki to be my goddamn manager because what he's done with Jon, what he did with, um, frickin' all his guys, what he did with, uh, your boy Yoel Romero, he goes to bat for them. No one else is fucking with the Golden Snitch like Malki does.

Joe Rogan 1:02:32 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 1:02:32 And everyone else kind of just goes, "Ah, fuck, we, we got busted, man." Not Malki, man. That dude's going to the end of the earth to fight for your freedom.

Joe Rogan 1:02:40 Yeah. He, he, and it seems like his-

Brendan Schaub 1:02:42 I don't know him that well, I don't know him as a person, you know, managers are managers. But I'm saying, if I'm the UFC, because they can't negotiate your sponsorship, it's Reebok.

Joe Rogan 1:02:50 Right.

Brendan Schaub 1:02:50 So what can they really do? Your contract, and now you got to deal with USADA, who's a huge deal.

Joe Rogan 1:02:54 Right.

Brendan Schaub 1:02:55 Malki is this fucking dog right now that you want in your back pocket.

Joe Rogan 1:02:58 And it's interesting that USADA's just released like, they released a statement that they're changing their policy. So say if you piss hot, they don't... And what's really interesting is Sean O'Malley right afterwards said, "Yo, I pissed hot." He said they don't want to announce-

Brendan Schaub 1:03:12 Yeah.

Joe Rogan 1:03:12 ... that people pissed hot. He goes, "I pissed hot." He goes, "Let me tell you something. Um, they're going to check my supplements and, uh, we, we think we've got it nailed. We think we know what it is. But in the meantime, this is why I was removed from this fight this weekend."

Brendan Schaub 1:03:25 So they're not going to announce it, they're just going to pull you from the card.

Joe Rogan 1:03:27 They're just going to pull you from the card.

Brendan Schaub 1:03:29 That ain't right.

Joe Rogan 1:03:29 And they don't announce it.

Brendan Schaub 1:03:30 That ain't right.

Joe Rogan 1:03:31 And then they go through the entire steps, and then if you're exonerated, you were never accused in the first place.

Brendan Schaub 1:03:38 See, the problem is, is whether you're Sean O'Malley, whether, whoever you are, Travis Browne, whoever, name any fighter you want. If you've ever been, if it's even been hinted, if you've ever had an issue, um, and you get that label, nothing... Like people just go, "Oh, he's on steroids."

Joe Rogan 1:03:56 Right. For sure.

Brendan Schaub 1:03:56 They don't do a big announcement going, "Sorry, we didn't find anything. My bad."

Joe Rogan 1:04:00 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 1:04:00 "We don't... Sorry. Hey, Josh Barnett, sorry you've been out for 22 months. My bad."

Joe Rogan 1:04:04 Right.

Brendan Schaub 1:04:04 What the fuck, man?

Joe Rogan 1:04:05 Right.

Brendan Schaub 1:04:05 Give me some sort of compensation.

Joe Rogan 1:04:07 That's true. Right.

Brendan Schaub 1:04:08 Also, so it took you h- how long to figure this out? I can't work during that time period.

Joe Rogan 1:04:13 Right.

Brendan Schaub 1:04:14 And because of you, I can't work. So how are we going to...

Joe Rogan 1:04:17 And you made a mistake.

Brendan Schaub 1:04:17 And you made the mistake. How are we going to make this right? "Oh, my bad. You can go fight now."

Joe Rogan 1:04:21 Yeah.

Brendan Schaub 1:04:22 That's insane.

Joe Rogan 1:04:22 Especially for Josh. He's like 37.

Brendan Schaub 1:04:25 He's not young. Or how about for-

Joe Rogan 1:04:26 I think he's actually older than 37. Josh might be 40.

Brendan Schaub 1:04:29 Yeah, he's not, he's long in the tooth. He's been