JRE MMA Show #46 with Ari Shaffir

1. 0:00 – 1:25

   Knives, camping trips, and Bobby Kelly’s outdoor ambitions

   1. JRJoe Rogan0:00

      ... and then there's fire.

   2. ASAri Shaffir0:00

      Bobby Kelly got us-

   3. JRJoe Rogan0:01

      Four, three, two, one. Can you talk about that on there or no?

   4. ASAri Shaffir0:06

      Yeah.

   5. JRJoe Rogan0:06

      (laughs) Yeah?

   6. ASAri Shaffir0:06

      Yeah.

   7. JRJoe Rogan0:06

      What were you gonna say?

   8. ASAri Shaffir0:07

      He got us these knives made. We went bushwhacking.

   9. JRJoe Rogan0:09

      Oh.

   10. ASAri Shaffir0:10

       Uh, and he got... This one guy was like, "I wanna make you guys knives." So he made Joe List and Robert Kelly, like, custom knives.

   11. JRJoe Rogan0:16

       Bushwhacking knives, huh?

   12. ASAri Shaffir0:17

       Yeah. (laughs)

   13. JRJoe Rogan0:17

       (laughs) Like machete-type knives?

   14. ASAri Shaffir0:18

       Yeah, to chop up some wood.

   15. JRJoe Rogan0:20

       Oh.

   16. ASAri Shaffir0:20

       Fucking do some shit.

   17. JRJoe Rogan0:21

       What were you guys doing?

   18. ASAri Shaffir0:22

       Camping, hiking, and then hiking, like, four hours to a campsite, then camping.

   19. JRJoe Rogan0:25

       Bobby Kelly loves fly-fishing, right? Isn't he a big fly fisher?

   20. ASAri Shaffir0:28

       (sighs) Yeah. Yeah. He, uh... Maybe. He likes doing shit that he, his body shouldn't allow him to do.

   21. JRJoe Rogan0:33

       Hmm.

   22. ASAri Shaffir0:34

       Um, (laughs) yeah, it's crazy.

   23. JRJoe Rogan0:36

       You know, I knew him when he was skinny.

   24. ASAri Shaffir0:38

       That's nuts. I see that video... That picture of him, that headshot at the Comedy Cellar. I'm like, "That's that guy?"

   25. JRJoe Rogan0:42

       Dude, he was, like, my size. He was, like, a normal-sized person.

   26. ASAri Shaffir0:45

       I... It's nuts to me.

   27. JRJoe Rogan0:46

       It is nuts, yeah. When I met him, we were working together.

   28. ASAri Shaffir0:50

       Yeah.

   29. JRJoe Rogan0:51

       And he, um, lived in, um, a home with, uh, special needs kids.

   30. ASAri Shaffir0:57

       (laughs)
2. 1:25 – 2:54

   Addiction replacement, weight gain, and the buffet trap

   1. JRJoe Rogan1:25

      (sighs) He has a kid too, right?

   2. ASAri Shaffir1:27

      Yeah, he has a kid. Great kid.

   3. JRJoe Rogan1:28

      Yeah. Well, why is he, um, allowing himself to eat himself to death?

   4. ASAri Shaffir1:32

      Okay, well, I think a little bit... In the addict's mind, you don't really have it. You're not-

   5. JRJoe Rogan1:35

      Right.

   6. ASAri Shaffir1:35

      ... really an addict. You got... It's like the replacement thing is real.

   7. JRJoe Rogan1:39

      Yeah.

   8. ASAri Shaffir1:39

      You gotta replace one with the other.

   9. JRJoe Rogan1:40

      What was his addict before?

   10. ASAri Shaffir1:42

       I think coke and, and, um, and booze.

   11. JRJoe Rogan1:45

       (sighs) Yeah, that's a thing, man. That's a-

   12. ASAri Shaffir1:47

       Yeah.

   13. JRJoe Rogan1:47

       ... real thing.

   14. ASAri Shaffir1:48

       And so now it's food... Every time he tries to get in shape, he does a month and then, like, it just f-... It falls off a day and then con-... Just keeps falling off.

   15. JRJoe Rogan1:54

       Mm-hmm.

   16. ASAri Shaffir1:55

       He's fatter than ever now.

   17. JRJoe Rogan1:56

       Yeah, I saw a photo from that cruise that Bert went on with him, and I was like, "Oh, God."

   18. ASAri Shaffir2:01

       Yeah, they couldn't let him go anywhere but the middle of the boat, otherwise it would, like, tip, they said.

   19. JRJoe Rogan2:05

       That's crazy. Sharks and shit were circling?

   20. ASAri Shaffir2:07

       Yeah. (laughs)

   21. JRJoe Rogan2:07

       (laughs)

   22. ASAri Shaffir2:07

       Yeah. (laughs) They're like, "Come to this side."

   23. JRJoe Rogan2:08

       (laughs)

   24. ASAri Shaffir2:08

       "Come to this side, Bobby."

   25. JRJoe Rogan2:09

       (laughs)

   26. ASAri Shaffir2:10

       "We have a chance to eat all those-" (laughs)

   27. JRJoe Rogan2:12

       (laughs) Well, you can't be on boat with those fucking buffets too, man. Those buffets are brutal.

   28. ASAri Shaffir2:16

       I gained 12 pounds on a week on the Joker's Cruise last year.

   29. JRJoe Rogan2:19

       I believe it.

   30. ASAri Shaffir2:19

       Oh.
3. 2:54 – 4:52

   Travel perspective: wages abroad, farming realities, and rice production

   1. ASAri Shaffir2:54

      Dude, the best is these fucking Filipino and, like, these immigrant-type, like, employees that are like cla-... "Are you guys done with this?" And they're like, "Oh, yeah, I'm done." They're like, "Are you kidding me? This could feed my whole village what you're throwing away."

   2. JRJoe Rogan3:06

      I know, right?

   3. ASAri Shaffir3:07

      Yeah. (laughs) And it's like, they have-

   4. JRJoe Rogan3:08

      It's so gross in America.

   5. ASAri Shaffir3:08

      ... to, like, keep their smile on their face.

   6. JRJoe Rogan3:10

      When you find out the real statistics of, like, how much people make in certain countries... You know, like, I was reading something about how much people... Like, uh, the average salary of a person who lives in Thailand.

   7. ASAri Shaffir3:20

      Yeah.

   8. JRJoe Rogan3:20

      It's, like, $1,000 a month.

   9. ASAri Shaffir3:22

      Dude, I was on a bus-

   10. JRJoe Rogan3:23

       It's amazing.

   11. ASAri Shaffir3:23

       I was on a bus from I- in Indonesia to East Timor. It was crossing a land border and some guy was talking about how much people make, and I told him. He's like, "Wait, what?" I'm like, "Yeah, but cost of living is way higher." And he's like, "That's great." I showed him a $50 bill. He was, like... Lost his mind.

   12. JRJoe Rogan3:37

       Wow. "How many, how many..." Jat, Cha... I forget how mu-... What their currency is. "How many is this worth?" And I told him. He's like, "What?"

   13. ASAri Shaffir3:44

       (laughs)

   14. JRJoe Rogan3:44

       (laughs) Yeah. I think I'm wrong too, about $1,000 a month. I think they make less-

   15. ASAri Shaffir3:48

       That's high.

   16. JRJoe Rogan3:48

       ... than $1,000 a month.

   17. ASAri Shaffir3:49

       Yeah, that's possible.

   18. JRJoe Rogan3:49

       I mean, it might be, like, one quarter of that.

   19. ASAri Shaffir3:52

       A lot of them also don't use currency that much. They're like-

   20. JRJoe Rogan3:55

       Oh, yeah?

   21. ASAri Shaffir3:55

       ... "We farm, we trade with our neighbor-"

   22. JRJoe Rogan3:58

       Mm-hmm.

   23. ASAri Shaffir3:58

       "... for milk."

   24. JRJoe Rogan4:00

       Oh.

   25. ASAri Shaffir4:00

       You know what I mean? Like, "We don't need currency."

   26. JRJoe Rogan4:02

       Dude, we took these lessons on how to, how to grow... How to, like, uh, take rice, plant it, and, like, they, they take you through the whole steps in Thailand. They, they give you the outfits and everything-

   27. ASAri Shaffir4:14

       Oh, yeah.

   28. JRJoe Rogan4:15

       ... that all the, the people that farm rice wear. But you realize, like, before industrialized agriculture, what a process it was to actually get rice. Like, fuck that. It is a giant process.

   29. ASAri Shaffir4:26

       Yeah.

   30. JRJoe Rogan4:27

       It's crazy how much work is involved.
4. 4:52 – 8:10

   Weed horticulture and the hidden “internet” of fungi and plants

   1. JRJoe Rogan4:52

      Well, the thing about the rice is, like, I thought that at least when you get the rice, you just get the rice off the plant and then you can boil it and eat it. No.

   2. ASAri Shaffir4:59

      No?

   3. JRJoe Rogan4:59

      It's like a husk and you gotta beat it down and break it open, and then the actual rice is underneath it.

   4. ASAri Shaffir5:06

      Oh, I'm just finding this out about weed. I thought you just pick-

   5. JRJoe Rogan5:08

      (laughs)

   6. ASAri Shaffir5:09

      ... weed off a plant and smoke it. And they're like, "No, you gotta cure it and dry it." I'm like, "Cure it? What?"

   7. JRJoe Rogan5:13

      What? You know what's the worst? Female weed is what you want, right?

   8. ASAri Shaffir5:17

      Oh, right.

   9. JRJoe Rogan5:18

      But male and female weed get together and they... If the male weed and the female weed get together, it ruins the weed.

   10. ASAri Shaffir5:26

       Yeah.

   11. JRJoe Rogan5:26

       Like, I didn't know that-

   12. ASAri Shaffir5:26

       Kinda like, kinda like real life. (laughs)

   13. JRJoe Rogan5:28

       Kinda like real life.

   14. ASAri Shaffir5:29

       (laughs)

   15. JRJoe Rogan5:29

       Yeah, men ruin everything. (laughs)

   16. ASAri Shaffir5:31

       Yeah. (laughs)

   17. JRJoe Rogan5:31

       I didn't know that, uh, that w- that plants, like... I don't know jack shit about horticulture or agriculture, but they, they breed.

   18. ASAri Shaffir5:41

       Yeah.

   19. JRJoe Rogan5:41

       Like, there's a male and a female version of these plants. I was like, "What?" Like, some guy who was a grower was trying to explain it to me, like, how they isolate the female plants. I go, "Wait a minute. What? Female?"

   20. ASAri Shaffir5:50

       Pete knows a lot about it.

   21. JRJoe Rogan5:51

       Of course he does.

   22. ASAri Shaffir5:52

       But, like-

   23. JRJoe Rogan5:53

       Yeah.

   24. ASAri Shaffir5:53

       ... yeah, it's like, "Wha- none of this makes sense."

   25. JRJoe Rogan5:55

       Female plants.

   26. ASAri Shaffir5:55

       "Female... What are you talking about?"

   27. JRJoe Rogan5:56

       Yeah.

   28. ASAri Shaffir5:56

       "Bro, plant, dude."

   29. JRJoe Rogan5:56

       "Is it girl?"

   30. ASAri Shaffir5:57

       "I'm talking about plants. You're wrong."
5. 8:10 – 17:19

   Stage fright, social anxiety, and how martial arts builds confidence

   1. JRJoe Rogan8:10

      Have you seen people eat their boogers? And you're like, "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

   2. ASAri Shaffir8:13

      Yeah.

   3. JRJoe Rogan8:15

      You eat your boogers?

   4. ASAri Shaffir8:15

      F- all the time, bro.

   5. JRJoe Rogan8:16

      Still?

   6. ASAri Shaffir8:17

      What are you gonna do with them? What are you gonna do with them?

   7. JRJoe Rogan8:18

      No, you fucking throw them away.

   8. ASAri Shaffir8:20

      Throw them away into the trash receptacle for boogers.

   9. JRJoe Rogan8:22

      Oh, God. You put them in a tissue, and you be gone with them. You don't eat your boogers, you savage.

   10. ASAri Shaffir8:26

       And then we run out of boogers.

   11. JRJoe Rogan8:28

       Well, okay, you do what you gotta do.

   12. ASAri Shaffir8:30

       I have one of these JRE shirts. The ... Oh, I have this one actually at my house.

   13. JRJoe Rogan8:32

       Oh, nice. I got one of your, uh, crazy mushroom shirts. Which tour was that from?

   14. ASAri Shaffir8:37

       Do Mushrooms Tour? Uh, I think it was two Specials ago, not the last one.

   15. JRJoe Rogan8:40

       There was that one, and then there was the other one with you with your tongue open with a n- with a, a, a- acid tab.

   16. ASAri Shaffir8:45

       Oh, that's the, that's the 2012.

   17. JRJoe Rogan8:46

       Oh.

   18. ASAri Shaffir8:46

       That's the 2012 shirt.

   19. JRJoe Rogan8:47

       2012 shirt.

   20. ASAri Shaffir8:47

       Yeah, that's the coolest shirt. I might not bring-

   21. JRJoe Rogan8:49

       Like the t-

   22. ASAri Shaffir8:49

       ... those back since I fucked up and didn't do a shirt this year.

   23. JRJoe Rogan8:52

       You should bring that back-

   24. ASAri Shaffir8:52

       Yeah.

   25. JRJoe Rogan8:52

       ... just to sell it. You should just sell it period.

   26. ASAri Shaffir8:55

       It's a cool one.

   27. JRJoe Rogan8:55

       Yeah.

   28. ASAri Shaffir8:56

       I like the idea of going, like ... 'Cause, 'cause, um, Iron Maiden had that with, like, a shirt per year.

   29. JRJoe Rogan9:01

       Yeah.

   30. ASAri Shaffir9:01

       You, you can show it off at the next Iron Maiden concert.
6. 17:19 – 22:08

   Hidden injuries in combat sports and Tony Ferguson’s brutal comeback

   1. JRJoe Rogan17:19

      I was talking to, uh, a friend of mine, who, uh... I don't wanna name his name, 'cause he got a pretty significant injury. And, uh, we were talking about, uh, his injury.

   2. ASAri Shaffir17:28

      Yeah.

   3. JRJoe Rogan17:28

      And it's fucking bad, man. You know, he needs surgery, and he s- uh, his bone is changing shape because of arthritis that's building up in his joint. And I'm like, "Oh, fuck." And he's a young guy. And it just makes you realize, like, the fucking punishment these guys are putting on their body, and it, it's, like, totally below the surface. Like, th- that people don't know, it's behind the curtain.

   4. ASAri Shaffir17:51

      Yeah.

   5. JRJoe Rogan17:51

      No one knows about it. And they've got, like, these devastating injuries that they're fighting off and then competing against world-class fighters-

   6. ASAri Shaffir17:59

      With injuries.

   7. JRJoe Rogan17:59

      ... with these torn ligaments and fucked up joints.

   8. ASAri Shaffir18:01

      Well, it's like what you were talking about with, uh, Tony Ferguson. You're like, "He didn't look comfortable on that leg."

   9. JRJoe Rogan18:05

      No.

   10. ASAri Shaffir18:06

       And he's like, "Yeah, he wasn't."

   11. JRJoe Rogan18:07

       You know what? He went six months from catastrophic knee injury, where the bone literally separated from the ligament. The ligament tore off the bone.

   12. ASAri Shaffir18:16

       Oh.

   13. JRJoe Rogan18:16

       ... did you ever see the- the- the picture of his-

   14. ASAri Shaffir18:18

       No.

   15. JRJoe Rogan18:18

       ... surgery? Oh, Jamie, pull that shit up.

   16. ASAri Shaffir18:20

       Jamie, pull that up.

   17. JRJoe Rogan18:20

       Pull that shit up, Jamie. It's a crazy surgery because it's ... I'm not exaggerating. He might be a 12-inch scar. It's enormous.

   18. ASAri Shaffir18:27

       Wow.

   19. JRJoe Rogan18:27

       It's like that big and it's all jagged and shit. And it's just ... He ripped it apart. They had to open him up like a trap.

   20. ASAri Shaffir18:33

       How did he fight again at 12 months?

   21. JRJoe Rogan18:34

       Not even. Six months.

   22. ASAri Shaffir18:35

       Six months, I mean, yeah.

   23. JRJoe Rogan18:36

       Insane.

   24. ASAri Shaffir18:37

       I don't understand how tha- that guy doesn't clearly get the title shot.

   25. JRJoe Rogan18:40

       He does.

   26. ASAri Shaffir18:41

       He does.

   27. JRJoe Rogan18:41

       We should talk about that. Look at that.

   28. ASAri Shaffir18:43

       Wow.

   29. JRJoe Rogan18:44

       That's crazy. And the thing is, that was just from a trip. He just tripped.

   30. ASAri Shaffir18:49

       Wow.
7. 22:08 – 23:54

   Success, attractiveness, and fame’s weird halo effect

   1. ASAri Shaffir22:08

      Yeah, when they talk about, like, how hot, like, celebrities are and, like, you wouldn't say that if he wasn't in nine movies.

   2. JRJoe Rogan22:12

      Mm, like who?

   3. ASAri Shaffir22:13

      I don't know.

   4. JRJoe Rogan22:13

      Like Ryan Reynolds? He's pretty hot.

   5. ASAri Shaffir22:15

      Yeah, things like that.

   6. JRJoe Rogan22:16

      Really?

   7. ASAri Shaffir22:16

      Yeah.

   8. JRJoe Rogan22:16

      The moon guy who's in the Moon movie? Right? That's ...

   9. ASAri Shaffir22:18

      Or maybe, like, Dane. Even, like, Dane, people are like, "He's good looking." Like, 'cause like-

   10. JRJoe Rogan22:21

       Dane Cook?

   11. ASAri Shaffir22:21

       Yeah, but, like, even back then, it was like ... But it's like now, he's fine.

   12. JRJoe Rogan22:24

       He is kind of cute for a comedian.

   13. ASAri Shaffir22:25

       He's fine, but for a comedian.

   14. JRJoe Rogan22:26

       Yeah.

   15. ASAri Shaffir22:26

       But for a super successful, so you're like, "Oh, this guy's hot." It's like, not really.

   16. JRJoe Rogan22:30

       Not, like, uh-

   17. ASAri Shaffir22:31

       Uh, uh, uh, um, um, Jeremy Renner. I remember him on commercial days-

   18. JRJoe Rogan22:35

       Oh. He's not that hot.

   19. ASAri Shaffir22:36

       ... and it was like, good looking guy, but now people are like, "He's so gorgeous." And it's like-

   20. JRJoe Rogan22:39

       Well ...

   21. ASAri Shaffir22:39

       ... that success is on that.

   22. JRJoe Rogan22:40

       That's true, yeah. For gals.

   23. ASAri Shaffir22:41

       Yeah.

   24. JRJoe Rogan22:41

       Isn't that funny that it doesn't work like that with girls at all?

   25. ASAri Shaffir22:44

       Uh-uh.

   26. JRJoe Rogan22:44

       At all. As a matter of fact, it makes them look a little gross.

   27. ASAri Shaffir22:47

       What, if they're- if they're hot- if they're more successful?

   28. JRJoe Rogan22:49

       Yeah.

   29. ASAri Shaffir22:50

       Like, meh.

   30. JRJoe Rogan22:50

       Super successful and not that good-looking, like, ew.
8. 23:54 – 32:10

   How Rogan’s UFC travel perk turned into comedy+fight weekends (and that infamous kiss)

   1. ASAri Shaffir23:54

      Anyway, the reason I wanted to come on here-

   2. JRJoe Rogan23:56

      Talk MMA.

   3. ASAri Shaffir23:57

      Yeah, it's because I had this unique experience that a lot of people ... Like, I mention it sometimes and they're like, "Oh, you've been to a UFC?" I'm like, "Dude, I've been to, like, 50 of them." And they're like, "How?" And it was just this cool thing where, I guess, in your contract early on, you got this deal. You get a free f- companion flight and a free companion hotel. And then you started inviting us and then we started doing comedy shows on Friday night after the weigh-ins.... and then it became like a thing.

   4. JRJoe Rogan24:23

      Yeah.

   5. ASAri Shaffir24:24

      And so, we ... These weekends we'd do one big show, and then go to the weigh-ins and have, and have, uh, the actual UFC the next day. It was just this fun weekend full of, like, doing something, standup, and also having fun.

   6. JRJoe Rogan24:36

      Well, how about the classic example of you and Duncan kissing- Mm-hmm.

   7. ASAri Shaffir24:39

      ... when CB Dollaway was fighting-

   8. JRJoe Rogan24:40

      (laughs) Sure, that's-

   9. ASAri Shaffir24:40

      That's a good way to start. Why not?

   10. JRJoe Rogan24:41

       It was Stevie, CB Dollaway, right? It was in-

   11. ASAri Shaffir24:43

       It was boring. It was a fucking wrestling fight.

   12. JRJoe Rogan24:46

       (laughs)

   13. ASAri Shaffir24:46

       It was boring. (laughs) And so-

   14. JRJoe Rogan24:48

       And you guys waited 'til the camera came, well here it is.

   15. ASAri Shaffir24:51

       (laughs)

   16. JRJoe Rogan24:53

       (laughs)

   17. ASAri Shaffir24:54

       Yeah, I was on the ground.

   18. JRJoe Rogan24:56

       And then, he turned. (laughs)

   19. ASAri Shaffir24:58

       (laughs) I couldn't stop laughing. Look at Frosty. Look at Frosty.

   20. JRJoe Rogan25:00

       Ugh. Ugh.

   21. ASAri Shaffir25:00

       I wish I had held it longer.

   22. JRJoe Rogan25:02

       Oh, it's Nate Marquardt. That's who it is.

   23. ASAri Shaffir25:03

       Nate, yeah.

   24. JRJoe Rogan25:04

       Nate Marquardt was fighting somebody.

   25. ASAri Shaffir25:05

       Um, uh, yeah. We were given Illuminati signs.

   26. JRJoe Rogan25:07

       (laughs)

   27. ASAri Shaffir25:07

       Duncan doesn't sit up there normally.

   28. JRJoe Rogan25:09

       (laughs)

   29. ASAri Shaffir25:09

       Frosty was always really cool-

   30. JRJoe Rogan25:10

       (laughs)
9. 32:10 – 35:55

   From “salad days” to smartphone chaos: UFC popularity, hotels, and sponsorship money

   1. ASAri Shaffir32:10

      (laughs) Uh, and then they're like, "Hey guys, you can't do that anymore. It's gross." I think that came out at the time, by the way. I remember one of the earlier ones in Sacramento. I, see, I got to see, luckily, not from when you were in the UFC, but from this middle range to where it is now, of like, all the fighters would stay at the same hotel.

   2. JRJoe Rogan32:27

      Mm-hmm.

   3. ASAri Shaffir32:28

      And like, we'd have the after-party there.

   4. JRJoe Rogan32:30

      Yeah.

   5. ASAri Shaffir32:30

      We'd all hang out.

   6. JRJoe Rogan32:31

      Yeah.

   7. ASAri Shaffir32:32

      Four or five fans would show up who knew about it, but generally it was just a way you can drink with Keith Jardine and all these guys.

   8. JRJoe Rogan32:38

      Those were great times.

   9. ASAri Shaffir32:38

      And like... Great times!

   10. JRJoe Rogan32:40

       Yeah.

   11. ASAri Shaffir32:40

       I remember you eventually had to make a decision, like, "I can't be here anymore. It's gonna be overrun with fans." But for a while, it was awesome.

   12. JRJoe Rogan32:46

       Yeah, you know, two things cha-

   13. ASAri Shaffir32:47

       The ring card girls would hang.

   14. JRJoe Rogan32:48

       Two things changed. One, cellphones with cameras.

   15. ASAri Shaffir32:51

       Pictures all the time. Yeah.

   16. JRJoe Rogan32:52

       That changed, because it used to be people just wanted to say hi. Then it was everyone had a phone out, and they all wanted to take a photo, and they would wait for you in the elevator bank. So you would get out the elevator-

   17. ASAri Shaffir33:02

       Come out.

   18. JRJoe Rogan33:02

       ... and there would be 50 people there, and you couldn't go anywhere.

   19. ASAri Shaffir33:05

       And you were always so late to the event. You're like, "I can't... I have to go. I should've left-"

   20. JRJoe Rogan33:08

       Yeah, you'd get mad.

   21. ASAri Shaffir33:08

       "... 20 minutes ago."

   22. JRJoe Rogan33:09

       And you're, "Wait, what about the fans?" I'm like, "I'm doing my job. I have to go do my job."

   23. ASAri Shaffir33:11

       Yeah, well, I'm gonna go do it for a million fans-

   24. JRJoe Rogan33:13

       Yeah.

   25. ASAri Shaffir33:13

       ... so you four don't really matter as much.

   26. JRJoe Rogan33:15

       I'm running to the fucking weigh-ins. These guys are starving to death right now, and I gotta get there. I can't be late for the weigh-ins. It's televised.

   27. ASAri Shaffir33:21

       No.

   28. JRJoe Rogan33:22

       People would get so angry if you didn't take their photo.

   29. ASAri Shaffir33:24

       But it was such good times. I remember in Sacramento, there was a hotel bar-

   30. JRJoe Rogan33:28

       Yeah.
10. 35:55 – 41:36

    Road stories, jiu-jitsu wear-and-tear, and Joe’s training philosophy

    1. ASAri Shaffir35:55

       And I was just getting in... I just started training with Eddie who started paying for that. And so I'd see the billboard at the Hyatt, now the Andaz, looking over The Comedy Store. I remember seeing Liddell could tour too, I think.

    2. JRJoe Rogan36:05

       Yeah.

    3. ASAri Shaffir36:05

       Um, and people were like, "Oh, it's a fight." I'm like, "Oh, what does that mean? Who are those guys?" And having Tate and you go like, "Yeah, they actually fought an epic fight or two." It might've been three, I'm not sure, um, "And now they're gonna have a rematch." I'm like, "Oh, cool." I didn't really know anything about it. I remember just rolling at the old Bomb Squad-

    4. JRJoe Rogan36:20

       Yeah.

    5. ASAri Shaffir36:20

       ... and having people talk about it. I'm like, "What is this thing that you guys are talking about?" I remember Royce Gracie, but I don't know who any of these people are. I don't know what the terms you're using, getting them on the ground, and like, uh, it's all, it's all a question of match-ups. Mattress makes five... I'm like, "I dunno." I'm just, like, trying to get a half guard in-

    6. JRJoe Rogan36:37

       (laughs)

    7. ASAri Shaffir36:38

       ... trying to figure out how to do that. My rear naked choke defense got good fast.

    8. JRJoe Rogan36:42

       Dude, you got pretty good.... you got pretty good. I remember you tapping people. I remember looking over and watching you tap some guys, going, "Damn."

    9. ASAri Shaffir36:49

       It was fun.

    10. JRJoe Rogan36:50

        Fucking jujitsu. If you brought... If bodies didn't break-

    11. ASAri Shaffir36:53

        Yeah.

    12. JRJoe Rogan36:53

        ... from doing jujitsu, it'd be the most fun thing to do. If, if bodies were way more durable, like, necks didn't give out, and-

    13. ASAri Shaffir37:00

        Mm-hmm.

    14. JRJoe Rogan37:00

        Like, Eddie's had three surgeries-

    15. ASAri Shaffir37:03

        Damn.

    16. JRJoe Rogan37:03

        ... inside of the last year. He had knee surgery, he had his back, disc replaced in his back, and then he just had shoulder surgery. It's like your body just gets blown apart.

    17. ASAri Shaffir37:13

        When I tore my meniscus-

    18. JRJoe Rogan37:15

        Hmm.

    19. ASAri Shaffir37:15

        ... um, I had a surgery. They didn't know what it was for the longest time, and your buddy, Dr. Steve...

    20. JRJoe Rogan37:19

        Steve Graham?

    21. ASAri Shaffir37:20

        Yeah, he was like, "Oh, uh, MRIs give false negatives 20% of the time. Um, just tell him to scope it." 'Cause I was like, "It's showing nothing." He goes, "It's probably, it's probably that. Just tell him to scope it." They went in there and found it, and did it right then.

    22. JRJoe Rogan37:31

        Hmm.

    23. ASAri Shaffir37:31

        But, um, when they did it, I was like, they were like, um, uh, "What do you do? What might hurt it?" And I was showing him jujitsu, high guard, just, like, on the table myself.

    24. JRJoe Rogan37:40

        Mm-hmm.

    25. ASAri Shaffir37:41

        And, and he was like... And so I'm pulling my leg back like that, you know? And he's like, "What? Why? Don't do that." And I was like, "Oh, that's... I have to do... (laughs) That's part of it." Like... He goes, "Why would you bend your leg like that?" (laughs)

    26. JRJoe Rogan37:51

        Ah.

    27. ASAri Shaffir37:51

        I'm like, "That's every day, man."

    28. JRJoe Rogan37:52

        That's silly.

    29. ASAri Shaffir37:53

        Or twice a week.

    30. JRJoe Rogan37:54

        They don't know what the fuck they're talking about. That's just a flexibility issue.
11. 41:36 – 1:02:46

    Running mechanics, minimalist shoes, and the pain of downhill movement

    1. JRJoe Rogan41:36

       It should probably say died. See how that guy's running? Look up. (coughs) See wh- where the, the guy's striking with his heel?

    2. ASAri Shaffir41:42

       It's wrong?

    3. JRJoe Rogan41:43

       Totally wrong. Not only is it wrong, human beings never ran like that before they invented those stupid fucking shoes. Those-

    4. ASAri Shaffir41:49

       I try to... I heard you say that before when you were talking about the goat shoes.

    5. JRJoe Rogan41:51

       Mm-hmm.

    6. ASAri Shaffir41:52

       So I try to, like, lead with my, with my-

    7. JRJoe Rogan41:55

       Yeah. Yeah.

    8. ASAri Shaffir41:55

       ... uh, not sole. What is it?

    9. JRJoe Rogan41:56

       Your, your ball of your foot.

    10. ASAri Shaffir41:57

        Ball of my foot, yeah.

    11. JRJoe Rogan41:58

        Yeah. That's how... You're supposed to lean forward more.

    12. ASAri Shaffir42:00

        Yeah.

    13. JRJoe Rogan42:00

        And when you lean forward more, you strike down, and you almost hit with your foot flat. But what you never wanna do is run like that asshole, heel down. That's how people destroy their knees running. And that was all created by Nike. Nike created that stupid-

    14. ASAri Shaffir42:14

        Really? The bubble.

    15. JRJoe Rogan42:14

        ... fat heel shoe, because, you know, to give you more cushioning. But it's just, the mechanics of it are totally wrong. If you ever watch little kids run, they run ball of the foot first.

    16. ASAri Shaffir42:23

        That's natural.

    17. JRJoe Rogan42:24

        That's, that's how you're supposed to naturally run. It's... Your foot is literally designed as a shock absorber. I run with those minimalist shoes. My shoes have zero f- cushioning, zero.

    18. ASAri Shaffir42:34

        Fucking Christians.

    19. JRJoe Rogan42:34

        So I'm running mountains and hills and shit like that. Even, um, when I hunted elk last week... See these guys?

    20. ASAri Shaffir42:39

        Oh, yeah. Right on the ball.

    21. JRJoe Rogan42:40

        They do both.

    22. ASAri Shaffir42:42

        But yeah, but the black ones, the real dark black ones who are good.

    23. JRJoe Rogan42:45

        (coughs) They run barefoot, those fucking guys. But these guys are, they're landing flat.

    24. ASAri Shaffir42:49

        Straight down.

    25. JRJoe Rogan42:49

        But they, they have a lot of cushioning on these shoes. You have to realize. Like, a- and some of these guys are landing heel. That guy in the back-

    26. ASAri Shaffir42:54

        Yeah, uh-huh.

    27. JRJoe Rogan42:55

        ... is landing heel first.... and that's because of those goddamn shoes. If you didn't have shoes like that, there's no fucking way. That guy's w- all heel. See that last guy? That guy's all heel.

    28. ASAri Shaffir43:05

        Yeah.

    29. JRJoe Rogan43:05

        You would never run like that. It's against the mechanics of the human knee. Hold it, go back to that. What is that video that just come up?

    30. ASAri Shaffir43:11

        Uh, it's, uh, it's the elite, uh-

Episode duration: 3:23:18