Jon Bon Jovi REVEALS His Only REGRET And Life Lessons As A FAMOUS 24-Year-Old!

Jon Bon Jovi 0:00 The industry said, "You're out of your mind. You're a dead man walking. You're the biggest band in the world right now. You can't fire your big-shot manager." Give me a good reason why. The word on the street was this is career suicide, but the band trusted me and we did it. I did it.

Lewis Howes 0:15 One of the most famous names in rock and roll. Has sold over 130 million albums. Please welcome Jon Bon Jovi.

Jon Bon Jovi 0:21 It's Bon Jovi. [cheering]

Lewis Howes 0:24 Welcome, Bon Jovi. [cheering] You brought in-

Jon Bon Jovi 0:29 Yeah

Lewis Howes 0:29 ... just a mediator, a therapist, a coach-

Jon Bon Jovi 0:31 Yeah

Lewis Howes 0:31 ... someone to-

Jon Bon Jovi 0:32 Yeah

Lewis Howes 0:32 ... kind of like say, "Hey, tell everyone how you feel."

Jon Bon Jovi 0:34 Oh, it wasn't easy and nobody was receptive to it. I was receptive to it. The guys fought it, and then after a couple of sessions of it, we committed to it.

Lewis Howes 0:42 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 0:43 I can absolutely, positively guarantee you, you will never see me giving 50%. That's out of the question. Don't think for a moment that Richie and David and Tico didn't give everything they had. They gave everything they had, too. Everyone's always looking over their shoulder and they've got that who's the bigger guy in the room. I gave that [beep] up so long ago. I could give a [beep] about it. [laughs] And I have very few regrets in my career. One of my few regrets...

Lewis Howes 1:12 Welcome back, everyone, to The School of Greatness. Very excited about our guest. We have the legendary Jon Bon Jovi in the house. Good to see you, sir.

Jon Bon Jovi 1:19 Thank you, brother.

Lewis Howes 1:19 Thank you so much for being here.

Jon Bon Jovi 1:20 Happy to be here.

Lewis Howes 1:21 My fellow Pisces.

Jon Bon Jovi 1:22 Yeah.

Lewis Howes 1:23 Uh, arena football lover, and so many other things. Uh, you have this incredible docuseries that's out right now as, as people are watching this, and there's so much about it that I didn't realize about you as a human being and your heart and your vision. I think everyone sees the accolades, the success, the platinum, uh, you know, records that you've sold, and the f- the four-decade career of hit after hit. Um, but what they really get to watch when they watch this series is your incredible vision for making all this happen and manifesting this into your life and building and creating it for decade after decade, and your beautiful heart. So I wanna acknowledge you for your heart because I feel like that love and that passion is what allowed this to come to fruition, this life you've created, and the impact that you've had

Lewis Howes 2:19 with your music around the world. My fiance, she's, she's Mexican, and sh- I told her I was having you on today and she was almost in tears because she said when she was a teenager she bought a CD of yours, and it was one of the, the first music that she heard where she started to learn English.

Jon Bon Jovi 2:36 Oh.

Lewis Howes 2:37 Was because of your music.

Jon Bon Jovi 2:38 Right.

Lewis Howes 2:39 So you've made, you make impact on so many people's lives in so many different ways that you're not even aware of.

Jon Bon Jovi 2:43 Correct.

Lewis Howes 2:43 So I wanna acknowledge you for that, uh, Jon. And there was a moment in, I can't remember if it was episode one or two, 'cause I got to watch the, the whole thing, where you talk about success and greatness. I don't know if you remember this, but you, you mention about success and you mention greatness in almost the same sentence, and you give a, a, a definition kind of of what they both are for you. Since this is The School of Greatness, I would love for you to talk about what the difference is between success and greatness for you.

Jon Bon Jovi 3:13 Well, I honestly can't remember the instance in the film, especially because it's been filmed over the last couple of years, but I guess my reaction to it would be this: anyone can have success. You could write a jingle that becomes a hit song.

Lewis Howes 3:37 Mm-hmm.

Jon Bon Jovi 3:38 And for five minutes that's called success and it's fleeting. Or you could strive for greatness, which means you gotta do it again and again and again and again and again and again. And, and you have to work hard, um, because it just doesn't happen. You know? It, um... Greatness is something to strive for.

Lewis Howes 4:02 Mm.

Jon Bon Jovi 4:03 And it is, it is given to nobody. Um, even the most gifted of musician or athlete or business leader, um, has to work at it in order to, you know, strive to achieve greatness. That's my opinion.

Lewis Howes 4:20 Yeah. Do you feel like... When did you feel like you were able to reach greatness in your musical career?

Jon Bon Jovi 4:27 I don't know that I ever felt that way.

Lewis Howes 4:29 Really?

Jon Bon Jovi 4:30 I think that that's sort of that chip on your shoulder that keeps you going. I do think that I've gotten quite good at it.

Lewis Howes 4:36 Mm.

Jon Bon Jovi 4:37 I think that given the opportunity physically, um, I can do it with the best of them at this point, but, um, I think it, with every song, with every song, let alone w- every album, it's can I do it again? Can I do it again? Can I do it again? How can I do it better? Um, I don't think you ever think you've achieved greatness. It's just striving for it.

Lewis Howes 5:04 Did you ever feel like when, I think it was the third album you guys had that went like, I don't know, 14 times platinum or whatever it did. It was like all over the world and you were-

Jon Bon Jovi 5:11 It's one of the biggest selling records ever, yeah. Slippery When Wet. Yeah.

Lewis Howes 5:14 Was that the biggest ev- ever of all time, or-

Jon Bon Jovi 5:17 No, no, no. I mean, for us it was huge.

Lewis Howes 5:18 For you guys.

Jon Bon Jovi 5:18 But it was, it was Thriller. It was Like a Virgin. It was Born in the USA. It was, it was one of those. It was huge.

Lewis Howes 5:25 Yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 5:25 It was massive, and it was everywhere.

Lewis Howes 5:28 When you have that big of a hit at that young of an age, I think you were like 24 or 25 or somewhere around there.

Jon Bon Jovi 5:34 Somewhere around.

Lewis Howes 5:34 How do you... And it surpasses so many other records or accomplishments of almost every other artist. How do you come with the mind of, "This isn't my best work and I can keep, you know, reaching this type of success"? Or do you think, "Maybe my best work is behind me"-

Jon Bon Jovi 5:50 No

Lewis Howes 5:51 ... at 25?

Jon Bon Jovi 5:52 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Absolutely not. Um, if anything, I didn't... My only regret, and I have very few regrets in my career, one of my few regrets is that I didn't take a little more time just to enjoy it. Because you coulda, shoulda taken the time to really enjoy it. I think that part of the journey of life is that in your 20s when you've got, A, that chip on your shoulder, and there's, there's all kinds of new surprises around every bend, um, you, you don't... really sure how to navigate this journey. You look to mentors and, you know, in some form or another to, to sort of guide you, and they do the best they can, but it doesn't mean that they had the answers either. Anyhow, you're on this journey, um, and all we could think of, at least all I could think of, was, "I gotta do this again. I gotta make sure that nobody thinks that was a fluke. That we can, we can do this again. We can do it again after that." So it was nose to the grind. And a year after

Jon Bon Jovi 7:06 the Slippery tour concluded, um, and it was 240 shows and massive success for the band, we were back on the road with the album New Jersey, which had five more top 10 singles and another 240, 250 shows one year later. Just back-to-back. Just went right back in the ring.

Lewis Howes 7:28 You know, there's one part in the docuseries where the ba- I think you guys are together for, I don't know, five years in a row it seems like, with very little time off, and there's this beautiful journey that you guys created this incredible family and these incredible relationships and brotherhood and team mentality. But then too much of a good thing can turn into a bad thing is kind of what you guys talk about in this series. Um, how did you not allow too much tension to actually break this band apart after so many years of success when there was just more frustration and resentment and egos? How did you keep it together emotionally, mentally, spiritually, physically, when everyone's got more money than they can think of now, when everyone's got more fame and success and their egos are at an all-time high? How did you keep it together?

Jon Bon Jovi 8:16 Well, everyone has their own unique perspective, and everyone's the hero of their own show, right? So I'm sure anyone in the band or the organization will have told you their point of view, and it may differ from mine. But having been the leader, namesake, whatever you wanna call me, um, I'd always had a certain vision and asked others to follow. Their opinions and their input was very welcomed, but obviously somebody had to be the quarterback, and so I, I treated this like a team. And I was the quarterback, but I knew I couldn't play without a receiver and a line, okay? So I wasn't, um, ego-driven, but I had to have a plan, stick to the plan, and sink or swim, make the decision. So when I did see that the burnout was happening after those two back-to-back records, um, and this was our first foray into that kind of territory.

Lewis Howes 9:26 Mm.

Jon Bon Jovi 9:27 'Cause it has happened to me other times in my career. Um, in this instance, there was a moment

Jon Bon Jovi 9:34 in time where I would, in retrospect, blame agents, managers, lawyers, because they were supposed to be the mentors that said, "We believe in you. Take your time, get it right." And they allowed us to keep going to the point of burnout. What I wouldn't allow was it to fall apart because I knew better than to think, "Wait a minute. Nobody physically harmed each other. Nobody stole money. Nobody stole a girlfriend. Nobody-

Lewis Howes 10:00 Mm

Jon Bon Jovi 10:00 ... was dead. Nobody was, you know, car crashed." Like, this was burnout. So you go back to team. You go back to, you know, what is it that got us here collectively, let everybody go out and, and gather their thoughts, get new information, bring it back to the fold, which in turn could make us stronger.

Lewis Howes 10:21 Mm-hmm.

Jon Bon Jovi 10:22 And, and I really by that point went out on a limb because at that point I'd fired the managers, agents, and lawyers and said to the guys, "I've got this vision. I believe it still works. And not only do I need you guys to come along, but I'm doing it without the rest of the apparatus now."

Lewis Howes 10:43 Mm.

Jon Bon Jovi 10:44 And they put their faith in that.

Lewis Howes 10:46 I mean, there's three things that I've gotten to learn about you through this series that's really inspired me, that I feel like you innovated and you led the way with in terms of anyone that I'm aware of in the, kinda the music industry at this high of a level, and I'm gonna share these three things. One is during that time where I guess the, the band was kind of in a lot of friction, at least from the story of the documentary, you brought in-

Jon Bon Jovi 11:11 Yeah

Lewis Howes 11:11 ... I guess a mediator, a therapist-

Jon Bon Jovi 11:13 Yeah

Lewis Howes 11:13 ... a coach, someone-

Jon Bon Jovi 11:14 Yeah

Lewis Howes 11:14 ... to kind of, like, say, "Hey, tell us, tell everyone how you feel."

Jon Bon Jovi 11:17 Yeah.

Lewis Howes 11:17 Like, let's, let's open up all of the emotions, the frustrations, the pains, the joys, and share it all. A- and this was what? 30, 20, 30 years ago or something like-

Jon Bon Jovi 11:27 30 years ago.

Lewis Howes 11:27 30 years ago, when this wasn't a popular thing to do.

Jon Bon Jovi 11:30 35 years ago.

Lewis Howes 11:31 That was, like, looked down upon 30 years ago. But you said, "I'm gonna have the courage to say, 'We need to bring a coach, an expert, a mediator, a therapist to come in and let everyone express themselves.'" Would you say that really helped-

Jon Bon Jovi 11:43 Oh, yeah

Lewis Howes 11:43 ... bringing people back together?

Jon Bon Jovi 11:45 Oh, yeah. And boy, was it met wi- resistance.

Lewis Howes 11:48 Really?

Jon Bon Jovi 11:48 Oh, yeah. You know, I'd heard about these therapies, especially in alcoholism

Jon Bon Jovi 11:53 and, and mental illness at, you know, and where you go to a rehab-

Lewis Howes 11:56 Rehab. Yeah, sure

Jon Bon Jovi 11:57 ... or, you know, and you're, you're, you're dealing with issues. Um, but like I'd said, we didn't have those issues. We had naivete and youth and-

Lewis Howes 12:08 Ego

Jon Bon Jovi 12:08 ... this rocket ship to success that was confusing because we went being, from being the children of our- ... parents to the parents of our parents.

Lewis Howes 12:18 Yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 12:19 And the parents of, we were now these CEOs, you know? We were now these decision-makers. We were now these money-makers. We were, we were, we were the gravy train, you know? It, life changed for everybody in the organization.

Lewis Howes 12:32 In your 20s.

Jon Bon Jovi 12:33 In my 20s. And that's, that's me being a, I don't know, a d- ch- I don't wanna say a visionary, but a different thinker. I, I thought differently. I just always thought differently. The way I got a record deal, nobody gets a record deal the way I got a record deal.

Lewis Howes 12:51 Mm-hmm.

Jon Bon Jovi 12:52 I went and knocked on a DJ's booth who, right now we think that there's millions of people are gonna watch this interview, which is nothing but ego, but in truth, it just could be you and I [laughs] Lewis.

Lewis Howes 13:04 [laughs]

Jon Bon Jovi 13:05 And nobody might ever, may ever see this or hear this, right? And we don't know. The loneliest man in the music business was a DJ talking to no one, preaching the gospel of music, and I said, "That man loves music more than anyone I know. I'm gonna go knock on his window and play him a song." It was the same kind of visions I've had throughout the process here where I said self-management. The industry said, "You're out of your mind. You're a dead man walking. You're the biggest band in the world right now. You can't fire your big-shot manager." I said, "Why?" I, and I wasn't being egomaniacal. I said, "Why? Tell, give me a good reason why." There wasn't a good reason why. And from 1991 to 2016, that's a lot of commission checks I didn't pay anybody.

Lewis Howes 13:51 Mm-hmm.

Jon Bon Jovi 13:52 You know? Um, but the band trusted me, and we did it. I did it. W- I built Bon Jovi Management.

Lewis Howes 13:58 That's the second thing that I was gonna talk about.

Jon Bon Jovi 14:00 But the therapist, Lewi- Lou Cox, he come in, and he had nothing to win or lose.

Lewis Howes 14:08 Mm.

Jon Bon Jovi 14:08 He wasn't on anyone's salaries. He wasn't on, on, on the pay roll. He wasn't even in the music business.

Lewis Howes 14:17 Wow.

Lewis Howes 14:19 What was the one thing that, that he taught you through that experience about mediation, therapy, communication?

Jon Bon Jovi 14:28 That every, well, little, silly, you know, elevator, uh, bumper stickers, like, you know, everyone's the star of their own show. It's five different opinions in this story. It's, it's five different points of view, but it was about listening in order to learn. It was about-

Lewis Howes 14:42 Mm

Jon Bon Jovi 14:42 ... you know, giving the floor to others when necessary. It was about being, um, a, a shoulder to lean on when somebody, you know, needed that shoulder to lean on. There was a lot of that that, um, there was no... The, it was just, it was all based in truths, you know, was looking into someone's eye and saying, "I love you," and meaning it.

Lewis Howes 15:08 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 15:08 You know, understanding what the words meant, not just, "Oh, we're performing on the stage together. Hey, you, dude..." W- I was never a dude. [laughs] We weren't dude. I wasn't interested in that. I was interested in cutting to a deeper place, you know? Our music got lumped into a, a genre of music because of we, of when we came up and the kind of stuff, you know, that I was 21 and 25. I, I looked like every kid in the mall. That's the way the kids looked in the mall.

Lewis Howes 15:39 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 15:40 So we were thrust into that, but that's not who I was. It was just we were put into that.

Lewis Howes 15:47 But you were... I mean, again, this is the thing that surprises me. You're in, this is what? The late '80s, early '90s, right?

Jon Bon Jovi 15:53 Mid '80s.

Lewis Howes 15:53 Mid '80s.

Jon Bon Jovi 15:55 '86, '87, '88, '89.

Lewis Howes 15:55 But when the therapy session-

Jon Bon Jovi 15:57 Oh, that's '90

Lewis Howes 15:57 ... that's, that's-

Jon Bon Jovi 15:57 Yeah, '90, '91, yeah.

Lewis Howes 15:59 '90, '91.

Jon Bon Jovi 15:59 Yeah.

Lewis Howes 16:00 That's what? Five to seven of you guys in a room together.

Jon Bon Jovi 16:04 Yeah.

Lewis Howes 16:05 And you're talking about love, and you're talking about your emotions, and you're talking I love you, and you're looking in each other's eyes, and you're being vulnerable. It, when I grew up in the '80s and '90s, you weren't allowed to do that stuff.

Jon Bon Jovi 16:16 Yeah.

Lewis Howes 16:16 So I'm saying you innovated this ability to, like, how, how are all of you able to be so receptive to connect openly, lovingly, vulnerably?

Jon Bon Jovi 16:25 Oh, it wasn't easy. Nobody was receptive-

Lewis Howes 16:27 In your-

Jon Bon Jovi 16:27 ... to it. I was receptive to it. The guys fought it. And then after a couple of sessions of it, they, uh, you know, had their, uh, private time with Lou, and then

Jon Bon Jovi 16:38 they would come back into group. And then, you know, and, and, and we committed to it.

Lewis Howes 16:43 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 16:44 We committed to it. Yeah.

Lewis Howes 16:45 How many sessions did you guys all do together?

Jon Bon Jovi 16:46 Oh, I don't know. It's like, in, it, let's just put it this way. Over the course of time that started in '90, and I was talking to Lou, you know, a year ago. [laughs]

Lewis Howes 16:59 That's amazing.

Jon Bon Jovi 17:01 So we still, you know, I, I would still touch base with him over-

Lewis Howes 17:04 That's incredible

Jon Bon Jovi 17:04 ... over time. Yeah. We needed him anytime.

Lewis Howes 17:07 How important was it for you to tap into your relationship skills and your emotional skills, you know, over your singing and songwriting skills in order to be successful as a group and as a band?

Jon Bon Jovi 17:23 I just looked at it like a f- a, a, a family is always gonna have its issues.

Lewis Howes 17:29 Uh-huh.

Jon Bon Jovi 17:30 A team is always gonna have their issues. Um, but having been a sports fan, I could see the inner workings of a team and think, I could see that the ego is, is, is prohibiting them from winning championships.

Lewis Howes 17:45 Oh, yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 17:46 And that a family can't get away from each other, you know, because of blood, but they could for, they could have nothing more than a, a common last name. So there had to be a way to take the strength of a name and the strength of a team and take the best of those things and, and maximize them. So, you know, if it's based in truth, you can get over ego.

Lewis Howes 18:09 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 18:11 It worked for me.

Lewis Howes 18:12 That's incredible. And it sounds like if you didn't allow, if everyone didn't join in that process, you guys wouldn't be where you are.

Jon Bon Jovi 18:21 Well, somebody could've quit easily. Yeah, it sure would've been an easier way for somebody to have quit

Lewis Howes 18:25 Wow

Jon Bon Jovi 18:26 Um, but nobody ever quit the band until Richie, you know, in 2013.

Lewis Howes 18:33 Right

Jon Bon Jovi 18:34 But that's much later.

Lewis Howes 18:35 Right

Jon Bon Jovi 18:36 Um, but no, no, everybody was committed to-

Lewis Howes 18:40 That's incredible, man. That's, so that's cool. So I, I loved, you know, one of three things-

Jon Bon Jovi 18:44 Yeah, that was, yeah

Lewis Howes 18:44 ... that I think you innovated. The second thing, you mentioned it. 1990, you're 29, you're 30 years old, and you say, "Okay, everyone in the music industry has a manager or has agents and all these different things. I'm gonna do it differently."

Jon Bon Jovi 18:56 Yeah.

Lewis Howes 18:57 You hear about that now of, like, independent artists and starting their own thing and launching their music through the internet, but in 1990,

Lewis Howes 19:05 like, that, that never happened. So you really innovated and led this way for artists 30 years before they started doing it. What was the biggest challenge you had to overcome in starting your own management company, navigating the landscape of ticketing and venues and commissions?

Jon Bon Jovi 19:23 No, what, what happened was is we, we let go of the old agent and got a, a new one, okay? So it wasn't that I didn't have one, we got a different one.

Lewis Howes 19:30 Right.

Jon Bon Jovi 19:31 Um, the manager, um, God bless him, you know, we're still friendly, um, but he said it, it was about him. And we went, "N- no, [laughs] it's definitely not about you." And then you have to think, like, what does he bring that is so unique?

Lewis Howes 19:48 Uh-huh.

Jon Bon Jovi 19:49 And granted, in that first chapter of my career, I learned a lot, and it was great, but when it was time to move on, I was glad that it was time to move on.

Lewis Howes 20:02 I never see-

Jon Bon Jovi 20:02 And then the, the, the, um, the word on the street was this is career suicide. But I had an incredible representative, and I, and I use that word endearingly. It was way more than a lawyer. He was the godfather to my daughter.

Lewis Howes 20:21 Mm.

Jon Bon Jovi 20:21 He was-

Lewis Howes 20:22 Yeah

Jon Bon Jovi 20:22 ... my father and my best friend and my brother all rolled into one. He never, ever, you know, took advantage of me. He represented... He t- he taught me everything I know about business.

Lewis Howes 20:33 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 20:34 And he's passed. He had frontal lobe dementia, and he's passed about seven, eight, nine years ago now. Um, there's a huge black hole in my life because he's not in it any longer.

Lewis Howes 20:46 Mm-hmm.

Jon Bon Jovi 20:47 Um, but he's what made me learn everything that I know now, and in turn, also re- made me realize we didn't need all that glitz and glamour. You know, we had an amazing right hand in a guy named Paul Korzilius, who was doing the day-to-day in the office. Jerry, uh, was doing all the paperwork, and I was making all the decisions.

Lewis Howes 21:12 Mm-hmm.

Jon Bon Jovi 21:13 We could do this.

Lewis Howes 21:14 Right.

Jon Bon Jovi 21:14 And we did it in a big way.

Lewis Howes 21:16 [laughs]

Jon Bon Jovi 21:17 We had the biggest tour in the world three times in, in that period. I had s- six number one albums. I had, you know, six number one singles.

Lewis Howes 21:24 [laughs]

Jon Bon Jovi 21:24 Like, it's like, [laughs] fuck yeah.

Lewis Howes 21:27 Crushing it. Yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 21:28 We did.

Lewis Howes 21:28 It's incredible. But how did you have the courage to do that when no one else had done it?

Jon Bon Jovi 21:32 I'd, I, I'd met with a half a dozen managers, I remember,

Jon Bon Jovi 21:35 at the time, or did, you know, like, meeting with managers again and going through that process and, and just not clicking with any of them.

Lewis Howes 21:42 Mm.

Jon Bon Jovi 21:43 There was none of them that moved me. And I, I needed somebody that was gonna dedicate their life to this the way that we dedicated our lives to it, and I wasn't getting that.

Lewis Howes 21:53 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 21:54 So I just w- why t- why?

Lewis Howes 21:57 Right.

Jon Bon Jovi 21:57 Do it ourselves.

Lewis Howes 21:58 Wow. It's beautiful. Uh, the third thing that I feel like you've really innovated in this industry of, you know, music and rockstar and, and fame, and all these different things, is you got married, you know, at the, the peak. I think you were in your late 20s, right? 28, 29, when you got married to a high school sweetheart.

Jon Bon Jovi 22:18 Yeah.

Lewis Howes 22:19 And for me, I don't know how you're on the road constantly with that much fame, that much success, that much money, and that much options, let's say, and you're able to enter a marriage and have a, what looks like on the outside, a healthy relationship for decades.

Jon Bon Jovi 22:35 35 years.

Lewis Howes 22:36 That's incredible.

Jon Bon Jovi 22:37 And nine months and-

Lewis Howes 22:38 So, so I feel like you've innovated this in a-

Jon Bon Jovi 22:40 Uh, uh, no

Lewis Howes 22:40 ... in a, in a space where-

Jon Bon Jovi 22:41 No, I can't take that credit.

Lewis Howes 22:42 Well, I feel like, you know, not many people-

Jon Bon Jovi 22:44 We're, it's fewer and far between.

Lewis Howes 22:45 That's what's-

Jon Bon Jovi 22:45 Bon Jovi's married as long. Bruce is married almost as long.

Lewis Howes 22:47 But very f- very few.

Jon Bon Jovi 22:48 You know.

Lewis Howes 22:49 Um, how were you able to have a healthy, s- successful, thriving marriage and relationship while all the other, you know, ego stuff and fame and just travel and success-

Jon Bon Jovi 23:00 That one was easy. That didn't-

Lewis Howes 23:01 Really?

Jon Bon Jovi 23:01 ... take a genius. Um, we grew together.

Lewis Howes 23:04 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 23:04 We went to high school together.

Lewis Howes 23:05 Yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 23:05 So we came through this whole rollercoaster ride together. So no matter my highs or my lows, she's seen them.

Lewis Howes 23:14 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 23:15 And that, that was intrical. She didn't meet me at the pinnacle of my successes or the, you know, the low points in my career and pick me up out of a gutter somewhere. So we, we grew up in the same hometown with the same kind of values, same kind of family background, middle class upbringing. Um-

Lewis Howes 23:31 She saw you doing cover band stuff back then.

Jon Bon Jovi 23:33 Sure.

Lewis Howes 23:33 Yeah, yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 23:33 In high school, you know what I mean? So that one, I just was, thank God, fortunate enough to get right the first time. And, and, and, and we held on, you know? It's, it wasn't... We never really had any kind of difficulties.

Lewis Howes 23:46 Really?

Jon Bon Jovi 23:47 Knock wood.

Lewis Howes 23:47 That's incredible.

Jon Bon Jovi 23:48 It's been 35 years.

Lewis Howes 23:49 What do you think is the key, and I don't, I'm not sure if anyone asks you about

Lewis Howes 23:52 relationship or marriage, uh, you know, advice ever, but what would you say are the three keys to having a long-term successful relationship while thriving at the top of your career as well?

Jon Bon Jovi 24:05 I don't know. I mean, the relationship thing, like I said, is mutual respect.

Lewis Howes 24:08 Okay.

Jon Bon Jovi 24:09 Admiration and mutual respect is at the, is at the top of this for me. To be a good listener and know it's not all about me, it's about we. You know? It's, it's about both of us. It's about all of us. It's about the, the, the family dynamic. So of course I'm always gonna be the You know, the narcissist [laughs] lead singer in the house. But there, there's no platinum records hanging in my house, you know what I mean? Like, we left that a long, long, long time ago in our, in our-

Lewis Howes 24:39 Wow

Jon Bon Jovi 24:39 ... in our home. Um, so admiration, mutual admiration society, being a good listener, growing together. Um, you know, just finding her in a way that, like, I get excited in the morning when I see her every single day.

Lewis Howes 24:58 35 years later.

Jon Bon Jovi 24:59 I get excited every single day.

Lewis Howes 25:01 What's the thing you love about her, her the most?

Jon Bon Jovi 25:05 That she absolutely knows that she loves me, like, with all of her heart.

Lewis Howes 25:11 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 25:11 You know? I mean, there's just, there's no question, there's no doubt, there's not even a glimmer of doubt, there's not even a hint of a glimmer of doubt that this is it. There is no... That's it.

Lewis Howes 25:23 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 25:24 Yeah, I, I got this one right.

Lewis Howes 25:26 When you're coming off stage in front of 80,000 people, and you're the man, and you're selling out the biggest tour in history back to back, and people are screaming every word and s- chanting your name, and then you go home and someone's upset at you or they want you to listen to them, how do you get over your ego of being Jon Bon Jovi and saying, "I'm gonna be a great partner in this moment."

Jon Bon Jovi 25:46 It might take a minute to walk it off, you know, uh, when you're on the, on the road for a long time. Especially in those younger years when we would, uh, be on the road f- so long that you, you could carry the lifestyle home.

Lewis Howes 25:59 Hmm.

Jon Bon Jovi 26:00 Um, but I haven't even seen that guy in a long time.

Lewis Howes 26:04 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 26:05 So it's, it's of, it's of no interest to me, um, to even see that guy. It, it, it really isn't.

Lewis Howes 26:14 Uh-huh.

Jon Bon Jovi 26:14 Um, boy, I'm, I'm s- I'm really trying to be honest with you, because even if it was 10 or 15

Jon Bon Jovi 26:21 years ago when we were just still, you know, a, a little more wild and, i- and, and I don't mean this in a, like we're subdued now, but it just, in a, in a little more, um, e- e- ego driven way.

Lewis Howes 26:35 Yes.

Jon Bon Jovi 26:35 You know? Um, even that wasn't a big deal.

Lewis Howes 26:39 Really?

Jon Bon Jovi 26:39 Yeah. I just-

Lewis Howes 26:40 Where did you learn that, though? Did you, did your parents teach you this or did your-

Jon Bon Jovi 26:42 I think it's our upbringing. It's who we are, where we come from, what we did. Um-

Lewis Howes 26:46 Wow

Jon Bon Jovi 26:46 ... I, I, I was never a big drug guy. I was never the big drinking guy. I was never the big... You know, one thing we learned on this journey, we're doing this interview right now in, in Los Angeles, California. I had a house out here for years on the beach in Malibu with all the beautiful people, and the first thing after owning that house for four or five years was, "We gotta sell this house."

Lewis Howes 27:12 Why?

Jon Bon Jovi 27:12 "We gotta get the hell out of here. This, this is not conducive to a great relationship and a great life and a great career, and a great grounded who we are, what we are, where we come from."

Lewis Howes 27:28 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 27:29 And I, it was the same thing when we went home and, roads slippery when wet. It was like we are being lumped in with these kind of bands that it's not our thing, and I was just like, "I, I don't wanna be a part of this scene. This is not who we are. It's not who I am. I don't give a [censored] ."

Lewis Howes 27:46 Right.

Jon Bon Jovi 27:47 Go back home. Take that picture in the inner sleeve in our driveway. You know, in our cars. [laughs] You know, with the blue jeans and T-shirts on. And sell that Malibu house. And you come out here and everyone's always looking over their shoulder, and they've got that who's the bigger guy in the room? Who can I go and work? Who can I get something from? I gave that [censored] up so long ago. I could give a [censored] about it. [laughs] Like, I'm not impressed. You know? I don't give a [censored] .

Lewis Howes 28:18 [laughs]

Jon Bon Jovi 28:18 It's just, that, that, that shallow [censored] will ruin you. And I know grown men who still are playing that game.

Lewis Howes 28:27 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 28:27 You know? And it's just sad.

Lewis Howes 28:29 Yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 28:30 And shallow.

Lewis Howes 28:32 What do you wish everyone knew about money, fame, and success?

Jon Bon Jovi 28:35 Money doesn't make you smart, it just makes you rich.

Lewis Howes 28:39 Does it make you happy?

Jon Bon Jovi 28:40 Does not make you happy. Now, can it pay for the bills so you can get, you know, the doctor and the insurance and the, those things? It can, it, it, it, it solves some problems, but absolutely does not make

Jon Bon Jovi 28:53 you happy and it doesn't make you smart. It just makes you wealthy.

Lewis Howes 28:58 What do you wish people knew about fame and accomplishments?

Jon Bon Jovi 29:02 Accomplishments are all fabulous, especially if you worked hard for them, and, you know, you have a, a, you deserve the opportunity to, to accept the accolade in and of the moment, and enjoy it. And then, you know, then you, you move on from it and don't measure who and what you are based on-

Lewis Howes 29:25 Right

Jon Bon Jovi 29:25 ... any kind of championship ring.

Lewis Howes 29:28 Right.

Jon Bon Jovi 29:28 You know?

Lewis Howes 29:29 That's not your identity. I mean-

Jon Bon Jovi 29:30 It is not who you are, it's just what you do.

Lewis Howes 29:32 Mm.

Jon Bon Jovi 29:33 Um, and I, and I, I, I too, I live by that credo. It's not who I am, it's just what I do. Um, but I've met many a billionaire who they're not smart, because, you know, they're just, they're missing out on the, on the good things in life, you know?

Lewis Howes 29:51 Mm-hmm.

Jon Bon Jovi 29:52 On, on, on, on being a part of their community, on, on touching the lives of their, their wives and their children, on, on, on sleeping on their pillow at night and knowing that they did something good instead of for a buck.

Lewis Howes 30:07 Yeah. And what do you wish people knew about fame?

Jon Bon Jovi 30:12 It's really an interesting question to ask at this juncture, right? It's 2024, and I remember having a conversation with my kids maybe 10, 12, 15 years ago, and them telling me about, that the internet and ways to make money. And I would say, "But you gotta write a song." To make money. You, you have to learn how to act if you, you know, we're talking about-

Lewis Howes 30:34 Like a skillset

Jon Bon Jovi 30:35 ... by the arts.

Lewis Howes 30:35 A skill, yeah, yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 30:35 So I'm saying, you know, uh, re- referencing the art, or you have to be an athlete and put in the 10,000 hours.

Lewis Howes 30:40 Uh-huh.

Jon Bon Jovi 30:41 Um, I've been proven wrong obviously now, right? There's, there's all, there's a whole world of people making a buck, and that is very confusing for me and my generation. It's very confusing for me and my generation. We, we were told that we could go to the moon, 'cause President Kennedy told us we could. But we had to go to school to learn how to do the science to get to the moon, [laughs] you know? He, we didn't just, you know, snap our fingers and get lucky on the internet one day. So it's a very confusing time. Um, but I don't, I don't think anything is a substitute for hard work and dedication and commitment. And,

Jon Bon Jovi 31:27 you know, not every day you're gonna win, but every day is an opportunity to, to participate in the process and measure your progress.

Lewis Howes 31:35 Absolutely. Well, you won a lot, though, consistently, which was pretty impressive.

Jon Bon Jovi 31:38 Yeah, it's all good.

Lewis Howes 31:39 [laughs] You wo- you won, you've been winning for-

Jon Bon Jovi 31:42 More than I've lost

Lewis Howes 31:42 ... you've been winning, yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 31:43 More than I've lost.

Lewis Howes 31:44 Championship after championship. And, uh, again, we're talking about Thank You, Goodnight: The, The Bon Jovi Story, which is on Hulu, uh, at the time of watching this. And, um, uh, I'm curious about, you know, you put in a lot of reps, speaking of 10,000 hours. When you were a kid you were doing cover band stuff in Jersey, and there's an amazing scene of, like, Bruce Springsteen coming up on stage while you were singing his song, and him singing it with you. And I can only imagine the, like, electricity and the excitement in your body as a 16, 17-year-old seeing someone who is, you know, bigger than you on, on stage who is singing with you. And, um, and you talk about, like, you could almost touch it. You're explaining, like, how you could almost reach out and touch this opportunity, and you just wanted to get closer and closer to that by being in the production studios and being on stages and being around these great artists and talent. I'm curious, where did your creativity come from? How did you... And when you ever felt, like, blocked creatively or burnt out, how did you get into a creative state?

Jon Bon Jovi 32:50 I was never the great singer, the great guitar player, the great poet. I was the hardest working singer, guitar player, and poet.

Lewis Howes 33:00 Yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 33:01 And so that was a big part of, uh, how I became me. If I was gonna drown, it was gonna be of my own doing, right? So that was, that was integral to the story. Also, what was integral to my personal story was that the drinking age was 18. And it sounds comedic, but it's true. Because at 16 you could slip into a bar.

Lewis Howes 33:26 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 33:26 Every 16-year-old thinks he's gonna be a pro athlete, a rock and roll star, an astronaut, you know? So you could go in there and say, "I'm gonna do this, golly gee," you know? And any little spark was enough to think that you could go to the

Jon Bon Jovi 33:43 next level, and the next level, and the next level. I was then fortunate enough that by 20, 21, I did write the song and knock on the DJ's booth. And the creative guy in me said how to get a record deal, how to then hire a band. Um, that was unique to, to the guy that was the harder worker.

Lewis Howes 34:04 Right.

Jon Bon Jovi 34:04 You know? 'Cause you could go down in the Jersey Shore when cover bands were making $3,000 a night in 1979, '80, '81.

Lewis Howes 34:14 That's real money.

Jon Bon Jovi 34:15 We were making $100 in an original band to split between everybody if you were lucky.

Lewis Howes 34:19 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 34:20 If you were lucky. If you were lucky, because oftentimes you'd play for free because it was original music. Um, so I never made any money, but I didn't need it 'cause I was 16, 17, 18. I was able to live at home.

Lewis Howes 34:31 Yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 34:32 And for me, that, that, that is a big part of the success was right time, right place, born at a certain time. You know, it, it, not privileged, but food on the table, shoes on my feet, and two parents, and they were supportive. All good things.

Lewis Howes 34:57 Yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 34:58 So all of those things helped.

Lewis Howes 35:00 Yeah, of course. You sound, the way you're explaining yourself, you know, not the best at all these different things, but the hardest worker, you kinda sound like the Tom Brady of rock and roll. You know? It's like-

Jon Bon Jovi 35:10 [laughs]

Lewis Howes 35:11 You're like the Tom Brady of ro- you're, like, not the best at all these things, but you, you willed yourself to become the best, and championship after championship after championship. I don't know if that resonates with you at all, but-

Jon Bon Jovi 35:21 It, it does resonate with me, because Tom, Kobe, um, LeBron, uh, you know, guys of, of this era, that, that's kinda the work ethic that I-

Lewis Howes 35:34 Yeah

Jon Bon Jovi 35:34 ... think that I have or always had.

Lewis Howes 35:37 Mm-hmm.

Jon Bon Jovi 35:38 Um, you know, it, yeah. Yeah.

Lewis Howes 35:43 You're, I mean, we had Kobe, uh, I got to interview Kobe on the show, um, before he passed, and just learned so much from him in that short interview. Um, you know, I, I know you have a relationship with a lot of the great athletes. You owned a sports team at one point, uh, the Arena Football team. But I think you said you have a relationship with Tom as well, or you've-

Jon Bon Jovi 36:00 Sure

Lewis Howes 36:00 ... interacted with him over the years.

Jon Bon Jovi 36:01 No, no, sure.

Lewis Howes 36:02 What would you say is the greatest, uh, you know, thing you learned from

Lewis Howes 36:06 Tom Brady about how he pursued his craft and how it applied to your craft?

Jon Bon Jovi 36:11 Oh, I, I, I've observed Tom closely, and I would like to think that I could call him my friend. I mean, he's been to, you know, my house m- many times and, you know, I go to practices and we talk on the phone and stuff. So, um, here's a guy that's, you know, much younger than me that I'm learning from.

Lewis Howes 36:30 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 36:30 Which I really appreciate, too. Because, you know, 199 in the sixth round and all that kind of stuff, and the audacity to tell Mr. Crafty, "I'm the best thing you've ever done." And, and to, to have a coach like Belichick, um, you know, on him and, and never giving him, um, all the accolades he could have easily, you know, let go to his own head, um, kept him working. But I think that we carried that, being from New Jersey, as a band for the longest time. It was like even with the accolades, we'll show you.

Lewis Howes 37:06 Yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 37:06 And like Dorothy would say, that I would just will things.

Lewis Howes 37:12 Ugh.

Jon Bon Jovi 37:12 And, and by sheer will, people would follow you if you led by example. And I didn't ask, you know, that, that this had to be this way or, you know, my way or the highway, but nobody ever said, "I'm out of here," because of hard work.

Lewis Howes 37:30 Mm-hmm.

Jon Bon Jovi 37:31 You know? They, they just did everything, too, and gave everything they had, too. Don't think for a moment that Richie, and David, and Tico un- didn't give everything they had, 'cause they did.

Lewis Howes 37:42 Yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 37:44 Yeah, they did.

Lewis Howes 37:46 You have this amazing quote in the docuseries that I wanna just read back to you that you said, [clears throat] "At 25, all I was thinking about was fun and success."

Jon Bon Jovi 37:55 Yeah.

Lewis Howes 37:56 "At 30, I got married and looked at success differently. By 40, start to measure if you accomplished what you set out to. By 50, you start to think about a legacy. By 60, as the Chinese proverb says, 'You are the man you're meant to be.' So at 60, when I look back, did I become the man I wanted to be?" I'm curious, do you feel like you've become that?

Jon Bon Jovi 38:19 I think it's a work in progress. Um, but I, I'm not disappointed by anything that I've done, and I've had very few regrets, which I'm really proud to be able to say.

Lewis Howes 38:32 Yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 38:32 You know,

Jon Bon Jovi 38:33 I've had loss. I've had physical ailments. Um, I've had victories and, and I've, and I've had defeats. But I'm very proud of the legacy thus far.

Lewis Howes 38:44 Yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 38:45 I haven't done anything to [censored] it up, you know? [laughs]

Lewis Howes 38:47 [laughs]

Jon Bon Jovi 38:47 As I've said, I'm only here to, to tell the truth.

Lewis Howes 38:50 Yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 38:51 And it's blemished, but it's, it's, it's real.

Lewis Howes 38:58 If you could go back, you know, to your, your younger self in your 20s or early 30s, uh, and you could only give yourself three piece of advice, and you know everything that you know now. You're, you're, you're just going back in time and you're speaking to your younger self, late 20s, early 30s. With everything that you've experienced, what three things would you say to that younger Jon?

Jon Bon Jovi 39:22 I think there's... I don't even know that there's three. I would say take time to enjoy it more. Don't lose faith in yourself even when you feel like you're maybe down for the last time, you know? And, and the, the eight count is going to nine. [laughs] And to believe in the power of we.

Lewis Howes 39:47 Uh.

Jon Bon Jovi 39:49 I think that those three things is probably what I would say.

Lewis Howes 39:53 If you could jump in time 30 years from now-

Jon Bon Jovi 39:56 Mm

Lewis Howes 39:56 ... and imagine you would get to accomplish everything and live the life that you wanna live for the next 30 years, and just imagine you're in that state of wisdom, what three pieces of advice would you give your younger self as you are today from that future self? If that makes sense.

Jon Bon Jovi 40:17 Well, 90 looking back on 60, um, you know, I guess I, I would probably say did you live up to the, uh, the code that you set, you know, for yourself and for others and now for the next generation? So with my kids-

Lewis Howes 40:34 Mm

Jon Bon Jovi 40:34 ... um, you know, that if, if I could see them becoming, um, members of society that, that were contributing something positively, then that will have been a victory.

Lewis Howes 40:51 Mm.

Jon Bon Jovi 40:52 Um, 'cause it's not about fame or fortune or anything else that goes with it. I think it, it, it goes back to did you leave something behind worthy of having been here?

Lewis Howes 41:03 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 41:03 So that to me right now as I sit here and I

Jon Bon Jovi 41:07 think about where my kids are, because they're all grown, I'm not thinking about me anymore. I sort of feel like I've, I've, I've achieved the highest highs. What I hope with this record and this film is that it's gonna say, "Hey, good mile marker, the 40th. And by the way, this new album's pretty darn good." But, uh, it's not gonna be Slippery When Wet again. You know, I'm 62 years old. It's time for the next generation to have their Slippery When Wet. But I would like to think that my next Slippery When Wet could be, you know, did my kids, um, make any kind of contributions to, to the world?

Lewis Howes 41:47 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 41:47 That would be neat.

Lewis Howes 41:48 That's beautiful. What is, uh, being a father taught you about life?

Jon Bon Jovi 41:54 You don't know [censored] . [laughs]

Lewis Howes 41:56 [laughs]

Jon Bon Jovi 41:57 Man, from the minute that we wa- I remember-

Lewis Howes 42:01 [laughs]

Jon Bon Jovi 42:02 ... you know, our first child was our daughter, and I didn't have sisters, let alone a baby. Uh, th- when the door closed on that first night, we were like, "There's no owner's manual that comes with this shit."

Lewis Howes 42:15 [laughs]

Jon Bon Jovi 42:16 Wow. So you figure it all out. Okay, step at a time, and, and you get it, and you work hard at it. And with every child and then with every chapter of every child, the playbook changed.

Lewis Howes 42:28 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 42:29 And with their girls to boys, and then toddlers to teens, and then teens to adults, and adults getting married- Nobody told me about [laughs] these chapters in the book. And I'm like, you would, I t- you would think that by now somebody would've warned me about-

Lewis Howes 42:49 Wow

Jon Bon Jovi 42:49 ... these chapters. Um, but no one had told me about these chapters, and they're, they're all different. So, you know, we're just trying to navigate it. And, and now all of my friends that are my age go, "Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Didn't we tell you?" I'm like, " [censored] you, man."

Lewis Howes 43:07 [laughs]

Jon Bon Jovi 43:08 [laughs] No, you didn't tell me.

Lewis Howes 43:09 [laughs] What is a, um, a lyric from one of your songs that you've written that really speaks to you of your season of life right now?

Jon Bon Jovi 43:20 Oh, my God. You're catching me off guard. I'm not usually good at this, but-

Lewis Howes 43:26 No worries

Jon Bon Jovi 43:26 ... there's a song on the new album, it's called Hollow Man, and it says, "What do you sing when the song's been sung?"

Lewis Howes 43:36 Mm.

Jon Bon Jovi 43:40 Um, "Who do you fight when the war is won?"

Lewis Howes 43:42 Ugh.

Jon Bon Jovi 43:42 "What do you write when your book is done?"

Lewis Howes 43:46 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 43:46 "What do you sing when the song's been sung? Here I am, the hollow man, telling stories about the promise of a promised land. I feel like a cheap bouquet of flowers in a one-night stand. Um, with my heart in my hand, I am the hollow man." And it just-

Lewis Howes 44:02 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 44:03 It's saying I'm, I'm a empty vessel. I'm, I'm here looking up at the sky and saying, "Okay, Lord, what's next?"

Lewis Howes 44:11 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 44:12 You know? And so that's just a, a song on the new album.

Lewis Howes 44:14 That's on the new al- That's, uh, that comes out...

Jon Bon Jovi 44:17 June 7th.

Lewis Howes 44:18 June 7th. Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 44:20 Yeah. Hollow Man's a, a story of me today.

Lewis Howes 44:24 Did you find an answer for that?

Jon Bon Jovi 44:26 No. I'm living it. Um, every day is an opportunity to write a song, but I don't often, you know, take every day as an, a, and, and turn it on.

Lewis Howes 44:39 Mm-hmm.

Jon Bon Jovi 44:39 And as a matter of fact, I, I at times have to turn it off, and just acknowledge that it'll be there next time I wanna turn the faucet on. But because it becomes so overwhelming, if you run the course of a cycle, like with the joy that I've found with this record, um, it was time to say, "Okay, it's being repetitive, it's time to shut off the faucet. Okay-"

Lewis Howes 45:04 Yes

Jon Bon Jovi 45:04 ... "now here's a new album. It's called Forever." These lessons won't be manifest... They're manifested, but they won't be fully learned for the next two years.

Lewis Howes 45:15 Wow.

Jon Bon Jovi 45:15 And then I'll look back on them, and then I'll know where I was.

Lewis Howes 45:19 That's some art for you. You know, 40, four decades plus of doing music, you've had to kind of, like, reinvent your identity almost every decade or every couple of albums or every few years, um, while keeping, you know, your roots, but innovating, you know, music and things like that. But recently you went through surgery on your vocal cords, and it's throughout the documentary series when people can watch it. And, you know, I c- I can relate to this in my own way of being an athlete and-

Jon Bon Jovi 45:55 Right, you can

Lewis Howes 45:55 ... and, and getting injured.

Jon Bon Jovi 45:57 Right.

Lewis Howes 45:57 And, and my-

Jon Bon Jovi 45:58 Right

Lewis Howes 45:59 ... whole identity be- my entire life being-

Jon Bon Jovi 46:00 Right

Lewis Howes 46:01 ... tied into-

Jon Bon Jovi 46:02 Good. Let's talk about this

Lewis Howes 46:03 ... being talented and being valuable and being able to use my skill sets to go make something happen of my, my dreams and my vision, right?

Jon Bon Jovi 46:11 Right.

Lewis Howes 46:12 But then when I got injured-

Jon Bon Jovi 46:13 Right

Lewis Howes 46:13 ... playing in a sport that you are an owner of, of another team, playing arena football,

Lewis Howes 46:19 that vision of my identity and my future became shattered literally-

Jon Bon Jovi 46:24 Right

Lewis Howes 46:24 ... and emotionally and spiritually. And it was a year and a half of recovery and trying to figure out, "Okay, what do I do next? Who am I on this next season of life? What is my next chapter? What is my next song? What is my next play if I'm not able to play that game anymore?"

Jon Bon Jovi 46:39 Mm-hmm.

Lewis Howes 46:41 In your journey of, you know, your vocal cords not being the exact same in your 20s, at 60, how have you mentally and emotionally dealt with the identity shifts and changes as an artist and as a man?

Jon Bon Jovi 46:58 You and I were talking off-camera about that period between when you stopped playing the game that you loved and determining that you were gonna be here, which probably was not in the cards-

Lewis Howes 47:09 Was not

Jon Bon Jovi 47:10 ... in 2008.

Lewis Howes 47:11 Was not.

Jon Bon Jovi 47:12 You never dreamt of this. But I'm gonna guesstimate that you're pretty satisfied with where you are right now.

Lewis Howes 47:17 Very satisfied.

Jon Bon Jovi 47:18 So look at that.

Lewis Howes 47:19 And it needed to happen in order for me to get on this trajectory.

Jon Bon Jovi 47:22 The obstacle is the way, right? [laughs]

Lewis Howes 47:24 Exactly.

Jon Bon Jovi 47:24 [laughs] And, um, and I get that. I trust there was a period of mourning for you.

Lewis Howes 47:33 Big time.

Jon Bon Jovi 47:34 Right?

Lewis Howes 47:34 Big time.

Jon Bon Jovi 47:35 Because from the time you were 8 until you were 20-

Lewis Howes 47:37 Yeah. 23, 24. Yeah

Jon Bon Jovi 47:39 ... 3, and 4, you were identified by the game.

Lewis Howes 47:42 Yes.

Jon Bon Jovi 47:43 Um, and then there comes that mourning and confusion. I haven't had to quit doing what I'm doing, nor would I ever have to stop writing a song or making a record, but if I chose not to go out and tour again because I couldn't be at that level I w- am accustomed to performing at, I do wonder how I'll behave.

Lewis Howes 48:08 Interesting.

Jon Bon Jovi 48:09 But I haven't come to that crossroad.

Lewis Howes 48:11 I hope you don't have to.

Jon Bon Jovi 48:12 I hope I don't have to either. If, God forbid, that is my future, the one thing I will know is I've exhausted every possible way-

Lewis Howes 48:24 Right

Jon Bon Jovi 48:24 ... back onto the playing field at the level, uh, that I'm accustomed to playing at. So when Kobe had the injury, when Tommy had the injury, when Michael Strahan ripped his pec off of his chest, you know, when every athlete goes through this, the question is, "Okay, I can get back on the playing field. Can I play in the Super Bowl?" You know, can I win again?

Lewis Howes 48:42 At the level of what I'm capable of, yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 48:45 And I don't know the answer. So I'm a work in progress.

Lewis Howes 48:48 How is that uncertainty? How are you dealing with that right now?

Jon Bon Jovi 48:53 It's better than it was, because I'm, I'm a really analytical guy when it comes down to it, and I look at pictures of the chords and the progress, and I, I'm optimistic about it.

Lewis Howes 49:04 Of your actual vocal chords?

Jon Bon Jovi 49:05 Yeah, I see them all the time.

Lewis Howes 49:06 Wow. So you see there's improvement.

Jon Bon Jovi 49:08 Yeah. But if, if it's not up to speed... Let's say this, you know, and I hate to even put it out in the world-

Lewis Howes 49:19 Yeah, yeah

Jon Bon Jovi 49:20 ... that I don't tour. I could promise you, Lewis, that I c- I will be able to say, "I did do it at the highest level-

Lewis Howes 49:29 Wow

Jon Bon Jovi 49:30 ... for the longest time." And I'm good with that. 'Cause one thing that I know that I've told myself that I, since I was 25, was I will never be on the Where Are They Now tour, you know, playing in the train station at the, you know, diner and the buffet y- on Friday evening. It's just not gonna happen. So I, I will be more than okay with that aspect of it.

Lewis Howes 49:55 You'd be at peace if you don't get to tour again.

Jon Bon Jovi 49:57 If I don't ha- I- if I don't have the opportunity, which I really would enjoy the, the opportunity, I'll live with it.

Lewis Howes 50:06 Mm-hmm.

Jon Bon Jovi 50:07 Because I'm still capable of writing a record. I'm still capable of recording a record.

Lewis Howes 50:11 That's cool.

Jon Bon Jovi 50:12 I just need to be able to do two and a half hours a night, four nights a week.

Lewis Howes 50:15 [laughs]

Jon Bon Jovi 50:16 And if, God forbid, that doesn't happen, I can, I can absolutely pos- positively guarantee you, you will never see me giving 50%.

Lewis Howes 50:26 Mm.

Jon Bon Jovi 50:26 That's, that's out of the question.

Lewis Howes 50:28 Wow. Well, I hope the world gets to see you perform on stage again. And, and if you're coming to LA, I gotta go, so I'm gonna find a way to get there for sure-

Jon Bon Jovi 50:36 Thanks. That'd be easy

Lewis Howes 50:36 ... and, uh, and check it out. I've only got about five more minutes with you, uh, to be respectful of your time. Um, and I want people to watch this docuseries. It's called Thank You, Goodnight: The Bon Jovi Story. It's on Hulu. Uh, so make sure you guys go watch this. It's fascinating. If you love art, if you love music, if you love Jon, if you love, um, just creativity, you know, ups and downs of success stories, you're gonna love this series. So make

Lewis Howes 51:07 sure you, you watch this. And if you really wanna study your mind and the vision that you had and the drive that you had to will your vision into existence, it is a beautiful story. Um, so make sure you watch this. Even if you don't like music, you'll be inspired by this story and your vision of bringing your heart and putting it on for the world to see. So I really am inspired by that. You got the new album as well, June 7th, that people can get. Uh, what's the best place for them to get that?

Jon Bon Jovi 51:39 It's streamed everywhere these days. Press a button.

Lewis Howes 51:42 Okay.

Jon Bon Jovi 51:42 You know? So any, Spotify-

Lewis Howes 51:43 They'll listen anywhere

Jon Bon Jovi 51:44 ... and Amazon-

Lewis Howes 51:44 Spotify, everywhere

Jon Bon Jovi 51:45 ... and everybody's gonna have it.

Lewis Howes 51:46 Okay, perfect. Awesome. Before I ask the final couple questions, what else can we do to be of service to you today?

Jon Bon Jovi 51:53 I don't know, unless you have a magical mystery cure [laughs]

Lewis Howes 51:56 [laughs]

Jon Bon Jovi 51:57 For the high C's in the vocal cords.

Lewis Howes 52:00 Um, one of the things that you do, uh, which I think is really cool as well, is you're, you're all about service. You've got a charitable foundation as well.

Jon Bon Jovi 52:07 Yeah.

Lewis Howes 52:08 You wanna give back. You, so many things you'll see in the docuseries about you-

Jon Bon Jovi 52:11 Yeah

Lewis Howes 52:11 ... wanting to be of service with your music, with your platform, with your fame, and, and I think that's really cool, so people can learn more about that as well. Um, this, this question, uh, final two questions, um, this one is called the three truths. So I've already asked you a couple hypothetical questions, but this is another one for you. Um, imagine you do get to live as long as you wanna live. You get to keep performing as long as you wanna perform. You get to do it all. You see your kids grow up even more. All the different things that happen in life. Um, but for whatever reason, it's your last day on Earth, many years away. Live as long as you want. And in this hypothetical scenario, you have to take all of your music with you, you have to take all of your writing with you. This conversation is no longer here. Any piece of content you've put out into this world, it goes with you. It's a hypothetical scenario.

Jon Bon Jovi 53:00 It goes with you.

Lewis Howes 53:01 It goes with you, or it's just not-

Jon Bon Jovi 53:02 You take it with you.

Lewis Howes 53:03 You take it with you, or it's not in this world.

Jon Bon Jovi 53:05 Okay.

Lewis Howes 53:05 It goes somewhere else.

Jon Bon Jovi 53:06 Okay.

Lewis Howes 53:06 We don't have access to it.

Jon Bon Jovi 53:07 Okay.

Lewis Howes 53:07 Hypothetical.

Jon Bon Jovi 53:08 Okay.

Lewis Howes 53:09 Um, so we don't get to hear your music anymore.

Jon Bon Jovi 53:11 Okay.

Lewis Howes 53:13 But

Lewis Howes 53:14 on this last day, you get to leave behind three truths, and that's what we do get to keep from you, are these three lessons. Um, they could be lyrics from a song. It could be something on your heart right now. It could be something simple, something, whatever it might be, but if it's the last day and you only get to share three lessons with the world, three truths, what would those three truths be for you?

Jon Bon Jovi 53:38 Wow. Live your truths-

Lewis Howes 53:46 Mm

Jon Bon Jovi 53:48 ... without compromise. Be of service. And take the time to see the world around you, to, to, to be one with the world around you. You know, see the clouds in the sky. See that the sun is shining. See that the waves are crashing. See that the traffic is rolling by. You know, just take the time to smell the roses.

Lewis Howes 54:34 Mm.

Jon Bon Jovi 54:37 Yeah, that's really important. Too many of us run through life missing every sign of what was there for your pleasure. And so many of us were all self-absorbed and consumed and didn't serve anything other than self.

Lewis Howes 54:58 Hmm.

Jon Bon Jovi 54:58 And so many of us lived a false life of what others wanted us to do and be, and I think that all of those things are just a waste of this moment in time that we were all given here.

Lewis Howes 55:13 Hmm. Well, before I ask the final question, Jon, I would acknowledge you again for being of service to humanity through your talent, your art, and your heart. And, um, you know, I love what you just said about not making it all about self, but also making it about service, and I think that's a beautiful life, so I wanna acknowledge you for speaking that and sharing that with people because I think a lot of people today just want to be successful and be famous and make it about them. Uh, so I think that's really cool that you're making it about service, and that's one of your truths. Um, my final question for you, Jon. You, you answered this a little bit earlier, but I'd love to hear if it's evolved. Uh, what is your definition of greatness?

Jon Bon Jovi 56:00 Boy, with my brain

Jon Bon Jovi 56:02 spinning in my head.

Lewis Howes 56:03 [laughs]

Jon Bon Jovi 56:04 Um, what is my definition of greatness? Greatness is being comfortable in your own skin.

Lewis Howes 56:15 Hmm.

Jon Bon Jovi 56:16 Um, greatness is, is leaving something that is worthy behind.

Lewis Howes 56:31 Yeah.

Jon Bon Jovi 56:32 Uh, I, I think I'll just leave it there.

Lewis Howes 56:35 Jon, thanks so much for being here.

Jon Bon Jovi 56:35 Thanks, Lewis.

Lewis Howes 56:36 Appreciate it, man.

Jon Bon Jovi 56:37 This was a joy.

56:37 I think it's being concerned what other people think and, uh, a feeling of that the people who make great things are somehow special and that they're not special, and that's just not true. That we're all... Everyone has the capability to make great things.