Key Wealth Secrets to Unlock Your Mind & Attract Money (Anyone Can Do This!)

Lewis Howes 0:00 If you are looking to make more money and to really figure out how to attract more into your life, this episode is for you. It's all about the psychology behind manifesting money and attracting more abundance in your life. And we have four powerful money experts to deliver some secrets that are gonna blow you away. So get ready, like this video, leave a comment below on your most valuable insight that you're taking away, take your notes, and also make sure to share this with one friend that you think would help them in their money journey as well. In this first expert and moment is a School of Greatness favorite. His name is Dr. Joe Dispenza, and I love how Dr. Joe can take these complex concepts and break them down for everyone to understand. This moment from a past episode that we did was one of the most re-watched moments of all time, and you thought it was extremely powerful. And maybe you missed this, so I wanna make sure you really listen to this, you dive in, and you pay attention. And as you listen, ask yourself this: How can you change your language around money to become more positive? What is your, your thoughts around the identity of money and the psychology of how we-

Dr. Joe Dispenza 1:15 Yeah

Lewis Howes 1:15 ... how it plays into our lives? 'Cause a lot of people wanna make more, they wanna attract more, but they're just struggling with just the concept of it.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 1:22 Mm-hmm. Yeah. Well, I think we've been programmed quite a bit, uh, in, with our relationship with money. I mean, y- we have a relationship with everything known in our environment. You have a relationship, a neurological network in your brain to, for your parents, for your cellphone, for your computer, where you live, where you've lived in the past, what you're gonna do tomorrow. The, for the most part, the brain is a reflection of everything that we know, right? So along with that is our relationship with money.

Lewis Howes 1:51 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 1:51 And I, I feel like I have a really good relationship with money, 'cause I work on having a really good relationship with everything in my life, right?

Lewis Howes 1:57 Did you always have a good relationship with money?

Dr. Joe Dispenza 1:59 I think so. I think so.

Lewis Howes 2:00 Yeah.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 2:00 I've never really lived in lack. That just wasn't part of it. Even when I went to college and I had to take out student loans and stuff, I always figured out a way to always be a little bit ahead of the curve. And so, so let's back up and just look at how people, uh, form beliefs. 'Cause-

Lewis Howes 2:18 Yes

Dr. Joe Dispenza 2:18 ... most beliefs, um, are created from past experiences, right? So, uh, children, uh, when they're, uh, in their early ages, their brainwaves are very slow. Like, their brainwaves are in alpha, uh, when they're, like, seven to 12. They're in theta when they're, like, uh, two to six years old and, and they're in delta, like, when they're, when they're, you know, newborn to two years old. And so these brainwave states, uh, are states that we're really suggestible to information.

Lewis Howes 2:49 So when we hear information, we believe it.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 2:51 And we accept it, we believe it, we surrender to it as if it's the truth without analyzing it, because there's no analytical facilities yet.

Lewis Howes 2:59 Right.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 2:59 The ana- the analytical mind starts around 12 or so, seven to 12, and that analytical mind is actually what's creates a barrier between the conscious mind and the subconscious mind. So-

Lewis Howes 3:09 So before 12, roughly, what we see, how we model our parents' behavior-

Dr. Joe Dispenza 3:14 It's all programmed-

Lewis Howes 3:15 ... what they say to us-

Dr. Joe Dispenza 3:15 ... it's all being programmed subconsciously, right?

Lewis Howes 3:18 Wow.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 3:18 And, and so, so that's really, really important, because if you heard, "Money is the root of all evil. Uh, money is bad. Uh, only certain people are allowed to make money. You have to work hard to make money."

Lewis Howes 3:33 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 3:33 "This is how you gotta do it," and that becomes the foundation subconsciously. Like, that's like write r- recording an audio file. You just keep recording that audio file, it becomes a subconscious program, right?

Lewis Howes 3:48 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 3:49 So a lot of people have a relationship

Dr. Joe Dispenza 3:51 with money based on either what they've been told or what they've experienced in their outer environment, right? So, so then we gain information from our environment, and the stronger the emotion we feel from experiences in our lives, the more altered we feel inside of us, the more the brain freezes a frame and takes a picture, and that snapshot is called the memory. So-

Lewis Howes 4:15 Based on an emotion.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 4:16 Based on an emotion. The emotion alters our internal state. So you're going along as Lewis, feeling really good.

Lewis Howes 4:21 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 4:21 Then all of a sudden you have this trauma, you have this crisis, you have this shock, and all of a sudden you have this dramatic change in your internal state and your senses get heightened, and then you freeze the frame and you associate this internal state with whatever it is that's causing it, right? And that's how we create long-term memories, right? So-

Lewis Howes 4:37 Are, are painful memories more, uh, powerful or beautiful memories more powerful?

Dr. Joe Dispenza 4:43 Uh, they're both equal.

Lewis Howes 4:44 Okay.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 4:44 They're both equal, but, but the problem is, I think most people experience fro- more the negative emotions.

Lewis Howes 4:50 Yes.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 4:50 Right? And those negative emotions really are derived from the hormones of stress, right? So the alarm system, the emergency system, creates an arousal, uh, inwardly, and that arousal's saying there's something dangerous in your outer environment, right? And it could be a person, a circumstance-

Lewis Howes 5:05 Mm-hmm

Dr. Joe Dispenza 5:06 ... an accident or whatever. And that, that change in emotional state causes you to remember the event. You gotta pay attention, right? You gotta stay really... And now you're focused on the cause. So, so think about people who have relationships with money, right, from the past. All beliefs are based on past experiences. So you have an experience where you lose money. You have an experience where, uh, money's taken away from you. You have an experience where you don't have enough. You're living in a place where there's not enough money or a family that's not enough money. Then the emotion that most people are living by on a moment-to-moment basis is lack. Like, I'm in lack of having something that I want, okay?

Lewis Howes 5:46 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 5:47 Now, there's nothing wrong with that, because the experience changes your emotional state. You freeze the frame. You take a picture. The problem is that's hardware. So we think neurologically within the circuits ... of that past experience-

Lewis Howes 6:01 Yes

Dr. Joe Dispenza 6:01 ... and we feel chemically within the boundaries of that emotion, which would, say, for example, be lack, right? So now, the person says-

Lewis Howes 6:08 What, what ha- before you go onto the next thing, what happens to the body and the mind when it is in an environment of lack? Mentally or physically, I'm in lack.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 6:16 Yeah.

Lewis Howes 6:16 What is, what is the body and the mind saying?

Dr. Joe Dispenza 6:18 Yeah, so the body is saying, "I'm waiting for some external event to occur. I win the lottery."

Lewis Howes 6:27 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 6:28 "I marry the right guy." Whatever it is-

Lewis Howes 6:31 Right, right, right

Dr. Joe Dispenza 6:31 ... that, you're waiting for that event to occur. That experience produces an emotion. So the emotion then takes away the lack. And so when we play the game in three-dimensional reality, the creation game in three-dimensional reality-

Lewis Howes 6:47 [laughs]

Dr. Joe Dispenza 6:48 ... um, we experience separation from everyone or everything because our, our senses fool us into the illusion, the hallucination of separation. I'm here, and you're there.

Lewis Howes 6:56 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 6:57 I'm here, and the door is over there. So I'm aware that I'm here at one point of consciousness, and the door is over there, another point of consciousness. Okay, so in order for me to get from here to the door, I gotta move my body and do something through space. I gotta do something, and everything in this three-dimensional reality is gonna take time and energy.

Lewis Howes 7:15 Yes, yes.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 7:15 All right? So, okay, so then here's, here's Lewis right here.

Lewis Howes 7:18 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 7:19 And then he says, "Okay, I want this experience in my future." And your brain automatically predicts and projects how far in the future you think it's gonna take.

Lewis Howes 7:30 Maybe it's a year, five years, 10 years.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 7:32 30 years.

Lewis Howes 7:33 Oh my gosh.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 7:33 Right? Because that's

Dr. Joe Dispenza 7:35 what it's gonna take to pay off that house, right? So now, one point of consciousness, I'm here. The other point of consciousness is where I'm placing my dream. So I'm separate-

Lewis Howes 7:44 Mm

Dr. Joe Dispenza 7:44 ... from that experience. So then how do I get to that experience? In three-dimensional reality, you gotta get up, and you gotta do something.

Lewis Howes 7:51 Every day, yeah.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 7:51 You gotta go to work. You gotta drive to work. It takes energy. You gotta fill your car with gas. You gotta eat food. You gotta work. You know, all this stuff. You gotta sleep. You gotta recover if there's stress. And now people are, in a sense, waiting for the experience that's 10 years down the road or 30 years down the road to happen, to take away the lack of them not having it. And unfortunately, many times when the experience finally occurs, they can't enjoy it-

Lewis Howes 8:16 Mm

Dr. Joe Dispenza 8:16 ... 'cause they're too exhausted, right?

Lewis Howes 8:17 [laughs] Right.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 8:18 So then, so you play the game. You, you, you go to school. You study really hard, or you study on your own. You develop some skills. You make the right choices. You start m- saving money. You start learning from your mistakes. And then the game is, how many things can you accumulate? And that accumulation then you associate with being wealthy or being abundant or being successful, right? And some people get really good at it, right?

Lewis Howes 8:46 Uh-huh.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 8:46 You can get really good at that. But for the most part, though, when we create from three-dimensional reality, we're creating from lack and separation. In other words, you're driving down the road and you see someone driving a car that all of a sudden you realize that you don't have. The moment you become aware that that person has that car and you don't have it, you're in lack of having it, right?

Lewis Howes 9:06 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 9:07 So what the brain naturally does is it naturally creates you driving that car. And you have an image of yourself driving that car, and you start identifying, "Wow, that would be a greater experience for me to have." The problem is the distance between the thought of what you want and the experience of actually happening it, happening for most people, is the concept called time.

Lewis Howes 9:29 Yeah.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 9:29 Right? Between cause and effect, right?

Lewis Howes 9:31 Uh-huh.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 9:32 So some people develop the ability to manage themselves and manage their life. They develop certain skills, and they can pay for it, and they can get it very quickly. The problem is, when the novelty of that experience wears off, you know, the car-

Lewis Howes 9:44 Mm-hmm

Dr. Joe Dispenza 9:44 ... and they're no longer identifying with that, then the, then the feeling of emptiness and lack comes back.

Lewis Howes 9:49 They need to find something else-

Dr. Joe Dispenza 9:50 They gotta go out-

Lewis Howes 9:51 ... to attach a feeling

Dr. Joe Dispenza 9:51 ... and find something else. And so there's this game that goes on where you never have enough, right? And that's the lack game, right? So then if you think about people, uh, having the things they want in their life, when they create from lack and separation, it's the experience in three-dimensional reality that produces the emotion. And the emotion is saying, "Let's feel that experience, this thing that you've been in lack and separation from." And that emotion then takes away the lack or separation. But you've worked really hard to get it, okay? Nothing wrong with that. Is there another way to do it?

Lewis Howes 10:24 Yes.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 10:24 Okay. So the person who's living in lack is waiting for their wealth to feel abundant. They're waiting for their success to feel empowered.

Lewis Howes 10:35 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 10:36 They're waiting for their healing to feel gratitude. They're waiting for their new relationship to feel love. They're waiting for the mystical experience to feel awe. That's the Newtonian model of reality, of cause and effect, you know, waiting for that event to happen to take away this separation or lack. Nothing wrong with it. It's the w- way most people create. But what we've discovered is actually something else. The moment you feel gratitude, your healing begins.

Lewis Howes 11:03 Mm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 11:03 The moment you feel worthy and abundant, you're generating wealth. The moment

Dr. Joe Dispenza 11:09 you're empowered, you are moving towards your success. The moment you're in love with yourself and you're in love with life, you'll create an equal. The moment you are in awe of life, you're going to have a mystical experience. And so that's causing an effect, right? So then if you can teach people then how to create instead of from lack or separation, but create from wholeness, and create from what we call the quantum field instead of three-dimensional reality.

Lewis Howes 11:42 What's the difference?

Dr. Joe Dispenza 11:42 Okay. So the way you... First of all, it takes knowledge, okay? The quantum field is an invisible field of energy that exists beyond our senses. You can't see it. You can't smell it. You can't taste it. You can't hear it. You can't feel it. It exists beyond our experience of three-dimensional reality.

Lewis Howes 12:00 Would this be in the, our mind's consciousness, or would this be in a different space?

Dr. Joe Dispenza 12:05 Okay. Let's, let's, let's look at that. So- The answer to the question is, how much of your waking day do you put your attention on matter-

Lewis Howes 12:14 Mm-hmm

Dr. Joe Dispenza 12:14 ... on the material world, and how much of your waking day are you aware of energy and frequency? For most people, they're unaware of the quantum field, and if you're unaware of it, it doesn't exist for you.

Lewis Howes 12:27 Right.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 12:27 Just like you have a nose, but if you're unaware of it, it doesn't exist for you.

Lewis Howes 12:31 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 12:31 The moment you become aware of it, it exists. Well, the quantum field, you can ask, you could study all kinds of science, and they'll tell you there is this invisible field of frequency and energy that exists beyond the senses that tend to connect everything physical and material. In fact, everything physical and material is connected to this field, okay? So how do you get there, right? How do you get there?

Lewis Howes 12:53 How do you get there? [laughs]

Dr. Joe Dispenza 12:53 How do you get there? So we discovered that when you take all of your attention off your body, and you are not paying attention to your emotions, your drives, your habits. If you take all of your attention off of every element in your environment, your cellphone, your tablet, your computer, uh, your, your car, your... Whatever it is, your bed. Take away, take your attention away from everything, every place that you live, where you sleep, where you work, and you're not thinking about time. You're not thinking about your schedule, where you need to be, or what happened yesterday. You can relax into the present moment. There, there tends to be a dramatic change in the way the brain functions when people do this properly. We call it getting beyond yourself, but in a sense, you're dissociating from your three-dimensional reality.

Lewis Howes 13:44 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 13:44 Why? Because if you're thinking about anything in your three-dimensional reality, that's where your attention is, and that's where your energy is, okay? So we kind of figured out this formula. When people really become nobody, no one, no thing, nowhere, and no time, we are pretty much all of a sudden outside the constraints of the Newtonian world of gotta do something to get an outcome. And if you can teach people how to linger there without a name, without a face, without a profession, without a family, without a culture, without a past, without a disease, you teach them how to be in this place we call the unknown, right? And you teach them that from that place, that invisible field, is where everything material comes from. And if they could create coherence in their brain, you need a strong signal in the brain. The more coherent the brain, the more stronger the signal.

Lewis Howes 14:36 What do you mean a strong signal?

Dr. Joe Dispenza 14:38 Okay, let's see how I could say this.

Lewis Howes 14:40 [laughs]

Dr. Joe Dispenza 14:41 When most people, we look at... When we look at brains in real time, and we're looking at people's, how their, how their mind is working. When you're under stress, okay? Stress is created by not

Dr. Joe Dispenza 14:54 being able to predict something that's gonna-

Lewis Howes 14:55 Mm-hmm

Dr. Joe Dispenza 14:55 ... happen in your life. Uh, the perception that something's gonna get worse, or you can't control something, right? So when that occurs, we switch on that primitive nervous system called the fight or flight nervous system, and the brain goes into this very alarmed state called high beta. That means pay attention to the outer world. There's danger out there. So it's... But if it's not a predator, and it's traffic or your coworker or your ex-

Lewis Howes 15:19 Right

Dr. Joe Dispenza 15:19 ... this is where it gets to be a problem-

Lewis Howes 15:21 [laughs]

Dr. Joe Dispenza 15:21 ... 'cause it becomes very maladaptive, right?

Lewis Howes 15:23 Uh-huh.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 15:24 So when we're in that state, and the brain is that, in that aroused state, we try to control and predict everything. So every person, every object, everything, every place, uh, every, even your body, has a neurological network in your brain, right? So as the arousal happens, we start shifting our attention to all these elements. And like a lightning storm, in the clouds, the brain starts firing very, very incoherently. And when the brain's incoherent, we're incoherent.

Lewis Howes 15:50 So that's not a strong signal.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 15:51 That's not, there's n- it's a static on the wire. That's disconnection.

Lewis Howes 15:54 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 15:54 There is no signal.

Lewis Howes 15:55 Right.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 15:56 So when we're in that state, we're always really looking for the worst case scenario of what's gonna happen.

Lewis Howes 16:02 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 16:02 'Cause if you prepare for the worst, anything less happens, a better chance of survival, right? So, so in this kind of aroused state, as we shift our attention to each one of these elements that are known in our environment, the brain starts compartmentalizing and firing out of order. And, and, and that is what creates what's called autonomic dysregulation. That's causes the brain and body to get really out of balance, right? So in that state, we're n- we're over-focused. You know, when you're stressed, you're over-focused on something. You can't stop thinking about it. Our research shows that when you do that, you actually make your brain worse.

Lewis Howes 16:39 Mm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 16:39 Because you're analyzing your problems within some disturbing emotion, and that emotion is driving you further out of balance. You're actually knocking your brain and body out of balance by thought alone, and you're driving it into these more aroused states, right?

Lewis Howes 16:53 For someone that's been living like that for decades, that's their base state.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 16:58 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Lewis Howes 16:58 How do they even realize how to get out of that?

Dr. Joe Dispenza 17:01 They don't. Usually, it takes crisis, right?

Lewis Howes 17:03 Right.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 17:03 It takes trauma.

Lewis Howes 17:03 Extreme breakdown.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 17:04 Yeah, a breakdown. That's-

Lewis Howes 17:05 A loss, a death, a-

Dr. Joe Dispenza 17:06 Yeah, all of that

Lewis Howes 17:07 ... a breakup, a divorce, a near, you know, whatever.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 17:09 Bankruptcy.

Lewis Howes 17:09 Yeah.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 17:09 Whatever it is. A disease, a diagnosis, whatever. Something where you just can't go on business as usual. Now it's time to really start looking, right?

Lewis Howes 17:16 They, they have to wake up then.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 17:17 Yeah.

Lewis Howes 17:17 Yeah.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 17:18 So, so let's get back to the concept of-

Lewis Howes 17:21 Yes

Dr. Joe Dispenza 17:21 ... abundance here because-

Lewis Howes 17:23 You need a strong signal in this field.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 17:25 Right. So then if you can teach people to do the exact opposite, go from putting all of their attention on everything physical and material in the world of separation, and instead of narrowing their focus on something material, ask them to broaden their focus and put it on nothing. Now, I know that sounds kinda crazy, but when you put your attention on space and you divert your attention, the act of sensing without thinking actually starts to slow the brainwaves down.

Lewis Howes 17:57 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 17:57 Not only slow it down- But all of a sudden cause the brain to start re- reintegrating, starts to synchronize, right? And so you see different compartments of the brain that were firing out of order start to-

Lewis Howes 18:09 Mm-hmm

Dr. Joe Dispenza 18:09 ... resonate. They start to communicate. They're, they're, they're, they're all of a sudden synchronizing, and what syncs in the brain kinda links in the brain.

Lewis Howes 18:16 Mm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 18:17 So when a person has their whole entire brain firing in rhythm, that's a very strong signal that you can send out into the field. If you-

Lewis Howes 18:25 So when that signal is strong in that position, what

Lewis Howes 18:28 can you create from that space?

Dr. Joe Dispenza 18:29 Okay, so but that's only one element.

Lewis Howes 18:31 Okay.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 18:31 [lips smack] So then the clear intention tends to be a very important element that we have to have to get down. And the more coherent the brain, the more clear the signal for that intention. So y- with intention and attention, we could actually make thought more real than anything else. Now, what is that?

Lewis Howes 18:49 Mm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 18:50 You're saying, what would it be like to be wealthy? What would it be like to be abundant? What would it be like to have all my needs met? What would it be like to have more than I need?

Lewis Howes 18:58 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 18:58 What would I do if I had everything I ever wanted? The answer always is the same. You start giving stuff away.

Lewis Howes 19:05 Okay.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 19:05 Because if an abundant person is truly abundant-

Lewis Howes 19:07 Right

Dr. Joe Dispenza 19:07 ... why would they hold on? They would say, "There's... I'm not in lack. There's more for everybody." Okay? Turns out, though, that the signal sent out isn't enough. You're gonna have to draw the experience back to you. And so then-

Lewis Howes 19:20 So sending the signal out to, you know-

Dr. Joe Dispenza 19:22 It's coherent brain

Lewis Howes 19:22 ... financial freedom-

Dr. Joe Dispenza 19:24 Or whatever that is

Lewis Howes 19:24 ... abundance, all these different things.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 19:26 Right, right, right, right. Whatever that is for you. Whatever that is for you.

Lewis Howes 19:28 So you're putting that out there-

Dr. Joe Dispenza 19:29 Right

Lewis Howes 19:29 ... with the signal, the, with the intention and the attention.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 19:32 Right.

Lewis Howes 19:32 And then how do you draw it to you?

Dr. Joe Dispenza 19:33 Okay, so, so now, so-

Lewis Howes 19:34 So in the physical world-

Dr. Joe Dispenza 19:35 Right

Lewis Howes 19:35 ... the 3D world-

Dr. Joe Dispenza 19:35 In the physical world, you gotta go get it.

Lewis Howes 19:37 [laughs]

Dr. Joe Dispenza 19:37 You gotta do something. This is the plane of demonstration. You gotta go get it, and when you... You're in lack until it occurs, right?

Lewis Howes 19:43 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 19:44 So-

Lewis Howes 19:44 But what I'm hearing you say, there's a way to not chase, but attract.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 19:47 All right, so if you're creating from the field instead of from matter, right, there's a very strong possibility that you'll shorten the distance between the thought of what you want and the experience of having it. And when there's a vibrational match between your energy and that future that you want to experience, now if you're creating from the field, you actually don't go anywhere to get it.

Lewis Howes 20:08 Mm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 20:09 You actually draw it to you.

Lewis Howes 20:10 Mm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 20:11 So here comes the synchronicities-

Lewis Howes 20:13 [laughs]

Dr. Joe Dispenza 20:13 ... the serendipities, the coincidences-

Lewis Howes 20:15 Yes

Dr. Joe Dispenza 20:15 ... the opportunities, and they come out of nowhere. And you, you say, "I don't understand. I, I, I didn't do anything." Well, you changed your energy. And, and so then the, the other element is a coherent heart, right?

Lewis Howes 20:32 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 20:32 And the heart has a magnetic signature, and the magnetic signature is what draws reality to us, right? So you combine that clear intention with a coherent brain. Now, here's the key. This takes practice.

Lewis Howes 20:47 Yes.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 20:47 Because the person who's living in lack is usually unworthy, is usually insecure, is usually in their past. They're usually frustrated. They're usually impatient. They're usually resentful because nothing's changing out there, because it's taking too long.

Lewis Howes 21:03 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 21:03 Well, that's... Everything takes a lot of time when you do matter to matter, right? So then if you teach them, okay, we know all about that. We know the story behind that.

Lewis Howes 21:13 Yeah, all the things of your past and yeah.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 21:13 We know what your parents told you about money, b- all that other. Don't worry about it. Don't worry about it. But now let's do something that would be really cool. Let's, let's write down the feelings of how you would feel if that future happened, and you're going to have to feel that feeling before it occurs. So now, okay, what does a, an abundant person feel? P- pretty much free.

Lewis Howes 21:41 Free.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 21:41 A lot of freedom.

Lewis Howes 21:41 Peace.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 21:42 Peace.

Lewis Howes 21:42 Excited, joyful.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 21:43 Uh, uh, um, in love with life.

Lewis Howes 21:45 Mm-hmm.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 21:46 Grateful to be alive, abundant. Okay, now let's practice-

Lewis Howes 21:51 Mm-hmm

Dr. Joe Dispenza 21:51 ... feeling those. Turns out, when you're feeling those other emotions like resentment and impatience and frustration, you're stepping on the gas pedal.

Lewis Howes 21:59 [laughs]

Dr. Joe Dispenza 22:00 You're s- turning on the sympathetic nervous system, and you're stepping on the brake.

Lewis Howes 22:03 At the same time.

Dr. Joe Dispenza 22:04 Which is, at the same time, which is-

Lewis Howes 22:05 Oh

Dr. Joe Dispenza 22:05 ... you're angry, you're frustrated, but the fight or flight nervous system says run, fight, or hide, and you're sitting in a Zoom meeting, and your neck is pulsating. It's because the heart is beating against the closed system, right?

Dr. Joe Dispenza 22:17 You're not, you're not using it in an adaptive way. So-

Lewis Howes 22:20 Mm

Dr. Joe Dispenza 22:20 ... the heart starts firing out of order and starts firing incoherently, and incoherent waves cancel each other out. It's called destructive interference, and then we stop trusting our future. Energy leaves the heart. Energy leaves the brain. Energy leaves the heart. And you can't get in touch with the feeling of your future because in survival, which those are hormones of stress, all those emotions, in survival it's not a time to create, right? It's time to run, fight, and hide. Okay, so we gotta lay down the very thing we used our whole life to get what we want, the habit of doing it that way for something greater to occur.

Lewis Howes 22:54 One of the things I love about Dr. Joe is how he gets us to constantly rethink and unlearn behaviors or patterns that hold us back. And so many people say to themselves, "Once I have more money, once I have the car, once I have the relationship, once I have the home, once I have the whatever, the increase at the job, then I will feel more abundant. I will feel better. I'll feel happier. I'll feel freer." Whatever it might be. "I'll feel enough." But the thing is, that I love that Dr. Joe talks about, is we need to change the internal emotion of gratitude, the e- the environment of emotion, of positivity, of love, of joy, and of abundance within ourselves. When you can shift, instead of saying, "Well, when I have this thing, then I'll feel more free. I'll feel more abundant. I'll feel more loving and deserving," and you say, "Now I'm gonna go into the internal first. I'm going to be harmony. I'm gonna be peace. I'm gonna be joy. I'm gonna express these emotions externally as well." When you first be the emotion and then you express that in your environment to people around you, then those things that you want come to you even more. They come in abundance. And it may not happen all at once, but the more you do it and you act as if, you don't also need all those extra things 'cause you have the emotions and the feelings that you want right now. So for me, I love that insight from Dr. Joe. Leave a comment below on what your big takeaway was from that as well. And building on these transformative ideas from Dr. Joe, I wanna turn our attention to the late, great Bob Proctor, who was a friend of mine, who was a guest on the show, that I had a building relationship with. I looked at him as a mentor of mine. I didn't get to know him for more than a few years, but we had an interesting relationship, and he was just a favorite person that I loved having on the show. And we were supposed to have him back on again, but unfortunately he passed. But he just had such a sharp mind and a giving heart all the way to the end of his life. Such an abundant dreamer, such a person and a man of high values, morals, and character that wanted to serve And he had big dreams all the way to his last days. And we're always told that if we work hard, then we will become successful. But Bob shed light on the fact that even hard work won't make me or us a success. There is more to it than just hard work, and in this moment, in this segment you're about to watch and listen, Bob shares three key habits for continual growth. And as you listen or watch, I want you to take notes on these three keys and ask yourself how can you implement them in your life today. Let's take a look. You were making $4,000 something-

Bob Proctor 25:35 Yeah

Lewis Howes 25:37 ... a year. Your expenses were $6,000, I think.

Bob Proctor 25:38 Yeah

Lewis Howes 25:38 Something like that. And then you started making $14-

Bob Proctor 25:41 No, my expenses run $6,000. I owed $6,000.

Lewis Howes 25:43 You owed $6,000.

Bob Proctor 25:44 I owed everybody that I, [laughs] that I knew.

Lewis Howes 25:46 And you were making around $14,000 a year after that, shortly after that.

Bob Proctor 25:51 No, I went from earning-

Lewis Howes 25:52 A, a month

Bob Proctor 25:52 ... $4,000 a year to $14,500-

Lewis Howes 25:55 A month

Bob Proctor 25:56 ... a month.

Lewis Howes 25:56 Exactly.

Bob Proctor 25:57 Now, if you annualize that, that was $175,000 a year. So I went from earning $4,000 a year to $175,000.

Lewis Howes 26:03 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 26:03 I hadn't earned $175,000 that year.

Lewis Howes 26:05 Right.

Bob Proctor 26:06 I got it up to $14,500 a month, so if you-

Lewis Howes 26:08 Got it. Got it. Got it

Bob Proctor 26:08 ... annualize it, that's, that's a change. Phenomenal change.

Lewis Howes 26:11 Is it possible for anyone to go from poverty level to extremely-

Bob Proctor 26:19 Absolutely

Lewis Howes 26:19 ... financially successful?

Bob Proctor 26:20 Absolutely. I think earning money is one of the simplest things ever learned, and it's one of the most misunderstood things. Wealthy people historically have always had multiple sources of income. They don't have one. They have many.

Lewis Howes 26:33 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 26:34 I was cleaning floors. I thought the answer was work harder-

Lewis Howes 26:37 Mm-hmm

Bob Proctor 26:38 ... 'cause I wanted to, I really wanted to earn some money.

Lewis Howes 26:40 Yeah, of course.

Bob Proctor 26:41 And I thought it was all-important. Today, my attitude towards money has changed dramatically. But I thought the answer was get another office to clean. Well, I was working so hard, I passed out on the street. I would've been maybe 27, 28. I literally passed out on the street, I was working so hard. I came to, and there's a great big cop looking at me. I was laying there. It was scary. There was a group of people around me. I saw lights flashing. Then I saw a guy, a couple of guys in uniform with a stretcher, and it was scary. I had passed out. I guess they thought I had dropped dead. I had a heck of a time getting away from them, but I did get away. They didn't take me to the hospital. I talked them out of it.

Lewis Howes 27:31 Wow.

Bob Proctor 27:31 I got away, and I got thinking, "I'm not doing this right."

Lewis Howes 27:35 Mm-hmm. Working harder, working more hours is not the way.

Bob Proctor 27:38 No.

Lewis Howes 27:39 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 27:41 In fact, Napoleon Hill wrote that in Think and Grow Rich. He said, "If you are one of those people who believe that hard work and honesty alone will bring riches, perish the thought. It is not true. Riches, when they come in huge quantities, never come as a result of hard work. They come, if they come at all, in response to definite demands based upon the application of definite principles and not by chance or luck." So you gotta find a demand and fill it, but you gotta follow princ- definite principles to do it.

Lewis Howes 28:11 Wow.

Bob Proctor 28:12 In other words, you gotta be in harmony with the law. You gotta give more than you get.

Lewis Howes 28:16 Mm-hmm.

Bob Proctor 28:16 If you're trying to get, forget it.

Lewis Howes 28:18 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 28:19 Well, I got by myself, and I thought, "I'm doing something wrong." I was earning more money, but here I'm passing out. Said, "It's not, this is not normal." And it's like a little voice in my head said, "If you can't clean all of them, don't clean any of them." So I got all dressed up. People now accuse me of sleeping in my suit. I got... I wouldn't take a suit off. I, didn't matter where I was.

Lewis Howes 28:46 [laughs]

Bob Proctor 28:47 'Cause I knew the cleaners were tired, and I would go around. I got other people cleaning offices.

Lewis Howes 28:52 Mm-hmm.

Bob Proctor 28:53 And I knew pretty well where they'd be, so I'd drop around, I'd bring coffee and donuts, and I would drop in and I would talk to them about goals, and then I'd go to the next person. But I always was dressed up, because I knew how tired you get, and if I was in working clothes, they'd expect me to help them so they could finish and go home.

Lewis Howes 29:10 Interesting.

Bob Proctor 29:11 But when I had shiny shoes and a suit and shirt and tie, they didn't expect me to help them clean. So I'd go on to the next place, and then the next place. And that's when I started to open offices.

Lewis Howes 29:20 Mm.

Bob Proctor 29:21 I went from Toronto to Montreal to Boston to Cleveland to Atlanta to London, England.

Lewis Howes 29:26 And you hired cleaners.

Bob Proctor 29:27 Uh-huh. Everywhere I went.

Lewis Howes 29:28 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 29:29 Yeah. I had people cleaning.

Lewis Howes 29:31 What should someone think about if they're struggling financially right now, or they feel like they're, they've been struggling for many years, and it feels like they're just surviving week after week, month after month. They're not sure how to get to that kind of sense of freedom for at least a six-month runway or beyond. What should they start thinking about?

Bob Proctor 29:48 Do you know, what you've just described, I believe the majority of people are living that way.

Lewis Howes 29:53 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 29:54 The majority. Now, that's rather sad,

Bob Proctor 29:56 but I think-

Lewis Howes 29:56 Yeah

Bob Proctor 29:56 ... it's true.

Lewis Howes 29:57 [clears throat]

Bob Proctor 29:57 And it's because we only have one problem in the whole world, and that's ignorance. They're living in ignorance. They don't know that what they're doing is gonna keep them where they are, and they keep doing it 'cause they don't know how to change. They're overwhelmed with the debt. People are saying, "I need the money," and they haven't got it. They want to take their family on a vacation. They don't have the money to go. So they may borrow it and go anyway.

Lewis Howes 30:24 Mm.

Bob Proctor 30:24 Now they got more debt. They have to understand that they don't have to live that way.

Lewis Howes 30:32 Mm.

Bob Proctor 30:33 I wrote a book called You're Born Rich. The truth is you are. Most people are just a little short of money.

Lewis Howes 30:39 Mm.

Bob Proctor 30:39 But you are born rich, rich in potential.

Lewis Howes 30:41 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 30:41 Anybody can go to our site. Go to bobproctor.com. You can download the book You Were Born Rich free.

Lewis Howes 30:47 Mm.

Bob Proctor 30:47 It won't cost you a cent.

Lewis Howes 30:48 Mm-hmm.

Bob Proctor 30:48 And chapter two is how much is enough. There's a, it's, it described very well how to get out of debt. You gotta create a debt repayment program where it's all done automatically.

Lewis Howes 30:59 Mm-hmm.

Bob Proctor 30:59 And then you focus on prosperity. You've gotta have a financial goal. You've gotta work toward it, and you've gotta understand that you can earn more than you're earning And wealthy people don't have one source of income. They have more than one. I was earning money all last night while I was sleeping.

Lewis Howes 31:18 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 31:19 You can actually earn more money when you're sleeping than you can spend when you're awake.

Lewis Howes 31:22 Yeah. [laughs]

Bob Proctor 31:22 You know, it, it sounds like a cute line, but it's true. There's no end to what we can earn. If you are not getting information from someone who is already wealthy, then you're probably getting information from the wrong people. Most people ask their brother-in-law, the guy next door, the w- girl they know, "How do I earn more?" Hell, if they knew, they'd be earning it. They don't know.

Lewis Howes 31:45 Mm-hmm.

Bob Proctor 31:45 And most people talk to people that don't know. Carlisle put it very well. He said he did not believe in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance.

Lewis Howes 31:52 Mm.

Bob Proctor 31:53 And that's where most people are getting it from, people that don't know any more than themselves. I think you have to go... That's why these seminars are so important today.

Lewis Howes 32:00 Yeah, yeah.

Bob Proctor 32:00 People have the opportunity to go and learn. Most people won't pay to go. I tell people, "Listen, you invest in this, it'll probably be the... And borrow the money to do it. It's probably the last time you'll ever have to borrow money."

Lewis Howes 32:12 Yeah. It's true.

Bob Proctor 32:13 We... I'm not... Our seminars are not rah-rah. It's not nothing. Our seminars teach people about themself.

Lewis Howes 32:19 Mm-hmm.

Bob Proctor 32:20 It's like when Bill Gove said, "If I want to be free, I got to be me." I'm thinking, "I better know who me is."

Lewis Howes 32:26 Mm.

Bob Proctor 32:26 I didn't know who me was. I was doing a lot of things. I was doing them right, and I was earning money, but I didn't know who I was. I start, started to study me.

Lewis Howes 32:35 Mm.

Bob Proctor 32:35 And the more I know me, the better I know you.

Lewis Howes 32:37 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 32:37 You only have to study yourself. You'll know what everybody, 'cause we're all the same.

Lewis Howes 32:40 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 32:41 It's our behavior that's different, our results that are different.

Lewis Howes 32:44 I heard a friend of mine, Dean Graziosi, I don't know if he coined this or someone else said it, and he s- said it for someone else, but he said, "Those that pay, pay attention." And when you invest in yourself, you're paying attention to what you're doing.

Bob Proctor 32:57 You know, I never heard that before, but that is the truth.

Lewis Howes 32:59 Those that pay, pay attention. If you don't pay for it, you're not gonna pay as much attention. If you pay more, you'll pay more attention to learning this.

Bob Proctor 33:05 I had an aunt and uncle who were as poor as church mice. I mean, they just didn't have anything.

Lewis Howes 33:12 [laughs]

Bob Proctor 33:12 And they had a whole house full of kids, and I used to drop by their house periodically. I was doing very well, and I was teaching seminar. And

Bob Proctor 33:22 I remember it was around Christmas time, and he was rushing around trying to get credit cards from some big store so they could buy presents for the kids.

Lewis Howes 33:31 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 33:31 And I said, "You know something?" He said, "Never mind. Next year it'll be different." I said, "You know something? Next year's gonna be exactly the same as it is this year, 'cause you never change you."

Lewis Howes 33:42 Wow.

Bob Proctor 33:42 I said, "You should get into the seminars and learn something. I know something you don't know." Well, they came to the seminar. He got paid every two weeks, so that meant three times a year, I think, he'd get paid three time, maybe four times a year, he'd get paid three times in a month. That one pay was extra, 'cause they were budgeted for two pays. I made them pay to come to it.

Lewis Howes 34:06 Wow.

Bob Proctor 34:06 Something said I made them pay, and I think they thought I should've comped them into it. But you know, Mark thanked me, my aunt, I don't know how many times that I charged them. She said, "We wouldn't have kept coming. I didn't even know what you were talking about." I was running seminars, it was seven evenings from 7:00 to 10:00. It would run over a series of nights years ago. And she said, "I wouldn't have kept coming," but she said, "Because we paid, I came."

Lewis Howes 34:32 Of course.

Bob Proctor 34:33 He's right. If they pay, they pay attention.

Lewis Howes 34:35 Exactly.

Bob Proctor 34:35 That is so true.

Lewis Howes 34:36 That's it.

Bob Proctor 34:36 And if they don't, they don't care.

Lewis Howes 34:37 It's not gonna be a... You're not gonna care. When you hear something you don't like, "Ah, this is not for me."

Bob Proctor 34:42 That's right.

Lewis Howes 34:42 "I'm gonna get out of here. Ah, I got something better to do."

Bob Proctor 34:44 Yeah.

Lewis Howes 34:44 Especially in LA, "Ah, I want to go to the beach."

Bob Proctor 34:46 Mm-hmm.

Lewis Howes 34:47 "This is too hard work."

Bob Proctor 34:48 Yeah.

Lewis Howes 34:49 "It's confronting my ego. Ah, I don't need this."

Bob Proctor 34:53 I'm firmly convinced if a person doesn't understand a paradigm, a paradigm isn't, is nothing but a multitude of habits.

Lewis Howes 35:00 Uh-huh.

Bob Proctor 35:01 They're programmed into your subconscious mind to control your behavior. It's got nothing to do with how smart you are. It's got nothing to do with what your formal education is. It's got nothing to do from which side of the tracks you come from.

Lewis Howes 35:13 Mm-hmm.

Bob Proctor 35:14 It has to do with your paradigm. The paradigm is a program in your subconscious mind, it's both genetic and environmental, that's controlling your behavior. Everyone that can hear my voice knows how to do better than they're doing, and they may wonder, why don't I do it? It's because you're programmed to do what you're doing.

Lewis Howes 35:32 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 35:32 And until you change the program, nothing's gonna change.

Lewis Howes 35:35 Mm-hmm.

Bob Proctor 35:35 Paradigm has to be changed.

Lewis Howes 35:38 I love that. What would you say are the... If you could share three key habits for people that if they want to continue to grow every day, be more prosperous, be more abundant, happier, joyful, healthier in their life, what are three key things, habits every day? Not talking about morning routine, but just overall habits every single day. What should people be focusing on consistently?

Bob Proctor 36:01 They should study every day.

Lewis Howes 36:03 Study.

Bob Proctor 36:06 They should have a mentor, someone that has already accomplished what they dream about. They might not even know the person. They could get introduced to them and ask them, "What are half a dozen things I should do every day?"

Lewis Howes 36:24 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 36:24 Ask them. They know.

Lewis Howes 36:25 Mm-hmm.

Bob Proctor 36:26 Most people are getting information from people that don't know any more than themself.

Lewis Howes 36:29 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 36:31 And the third one, you've definitely got to have a goal, and when you write it, you've already got it intellectually. So you operate intellectually, emotionally, and physically. Well, your intellectual mind, the second you say, second you decide on it, you've got it. It tells you in the Bible, "Before you speak, I'll hear you." [laughs]

Lewis Howes 36:52 Mm-hmm. Mm.

Bob Proctor 36:52 It's 'cause the thought always precedes the word.

Lewis Howes 36:54 Mm-hmm.

Bob Proctor 36:56 The second you get emotionally involved, you've got it emotionally.

Lewis Howes 36:58 Yep.

Bob Proctor 36:59 So you've got it intellectually, you've got it emotionally, it's only a period of time till you've got it physically.

Lewis Howes 37:03 Mm. Be, do,

Lewis Howes 37:05 have, yeah.

Bob Proctor 37:06 That's right. But the have comes in a period of time. Okay?

Lewis Howes 37:09 So it's not, it's not overnight? [laughs]

Bob Proctor 37:12 Every seed has a gestation or an incubation period. When a woman gets pregnant with a child, it takes 280 days.

Lewis Howes 37:21 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 37:22 The husband doesn't come home a month later and say, "Come on, where is it?"

Lewis Howes 37:25 Right.

Bob Proctor 37:26 He waits, as-

Lewis Howes 37:27 Right

Bob Proctor 37:27 ... James Allen said, as one who understands.

Lewis Howes 37:29 Mm.

Bob Proctor 37:30 He understands there's a gestation period. Where I come from, if you plant a seed for a carrot, it takes approximately 70 days for it to manifest.

Lewis Howes 37:37 Mm.

Bob Proctor 37:39 All physical seeds have a gestation or an incubation period. We know that now, but we didn't always know that. We weren't always aware. No one knows what the gestation period is for a spiritual seed, and an idea is a spiritual seed.

Lewis Howes 37:54 Mm-hmm.

Bob Proctor 37:55 But we do know that it operates by the same laws, and the laws of the universe are precise. They can be studied.

Lewis Howes 38:04 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 38:04 They can be understood. We operate by law. Our life is governed by laws. Like, we know it's gonna get dark tonight. We don't wonder if it is.

Lewis Howes 38:12 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 38:13 You know when the tide goes out, it's coming back. Winter never follows winter. We know these things. That's all expression of law.

Lewis Howes 38:21 Mm-hmm.

Bob Proctor 38:22 Well, when we bring our life into harmony with the laws, we're gonna enjoy more of life.

Lewis Howes 38:27 Yeah.

Bob Proctor 38:28 If we fight it, we're gonna lose.

Lewis Howes 38:31 Study, study, study, have great mentors who have already created what you want, and get clear goals, and look at those goals over and over again, and work every day towards those goals. I loved those takeaways from Bob. And I would always ask Bob when I would talk to him, "Hey, what, what are you reading lately? What's the books you're reading?" And he would tell me, like, the books he's reading in his 80s, and he was a constant learner. And I think one of the cool things also is that he would read the same book over and over again. He didn't just read it once and then go to the next thing, although he would read lots of books, but he had his key books that he was like, "Every time I read it, I remind myself that I need to keep showing up in a certain way, and I learn something new when I read the same book." You know, a lot of people ask me, like, "Lewis, why do you continue to do this show after 11-plus years and keep interviewing these people? Don't you hear kind of the same stuff over and over again, just from different messengers?" And sure, I do hear a lot of the same things over and over again, but I need these reminders in my life just as much as everyone else does. And so I'm constantly learning, and I never wanna stop being a learner. So again, big shout-out to Bob Proctor and his wisdom. I'm so grateful for his mentorship in that he gave us so much great content to continue to learn from him for many years to come. Big thanks to Bob Proctor, and if you wanna make sure to check out the other interviews we had with him, we'll have that linked below with all of our experts from these clips here today. Next up, we have the one and only George Kamel that... I think this interview did over a million views pretty quickly, because the things that George was talking about, who's also a Ramsey personality, he talked about the key habits of millionaires that lead to financial success. And I love how George breaks these habits down, making them accessible and actionable for everyone. You know, I bring on a lot of billionaires, and mega-millionaires, and people that have had these big exits in their companies to talk about money, but it's also important to have someone like George, who's worked in a career for over a decade and found a way to build wealth for himself doing it in a different approach, but also finding

Lewis Howes 40:40 a way to create freedom as well by being debt-free. And so before we dive into this next segment, ask yourself this: How can you cultivate commitment and joy in the small things in your life as you're looking to build wealth as well? You went from a negative net worth to millionaire status in under a decade, and I'm curious, to start this off, what would be the top five habits of millionaires that you've studied and also you've applied in order to get that status?

George Kamel 41:10 Ooh, that's a great question. So we did the largest study of millionaires ever done in North America, and I think there's a lot of overlap in the habits that we talk about with the Ramsey Baby Steps and what we found with millionaires. So it was encouraging, uh, because it just gave us some great confidence in the Ramsey plan to go like, "This works. Every time you work it, it works, whether you make $40,000 or $400,000." And so one of those habits is living on less than you make.

Lewis Howes 41:35 Mm.

George Kamel 41:36 If you can't do that, this, this is not for you.

Lewis Howes 41:38 Right.

George Kamel 41:38 Like, if, if you make $40,000 and you spend $60,000 a year, that's a problem. The other one we found-

Lewis Howes 41:45 Wait, why, why-

George Kamel 41:45 ... is delayed gratification

Lewis Howes 41:46 ... for that first one, why do you think people feel the need to spend more than they actually make?

George Kamel 41:52 I think at the root of it, it's discontentment.

Lewis Howes 41:53 Mm.

George Kamel 41:54 We're not content with what we have. It's never enough, and thanks to debt, you're able to do that. Like, before debt existed, you couldn't spend more than you made. It was physically impossible.

Lewis Howes 42:05 Right.

George Kamel 42:06 And, and all of a sudden, with the advent of debt, and I talk about the history of each piece of the puzzle here, like, "Where did credit cards come from? Where did auto loans originate? What about student loans? How did this all happen?" And most of it was good intentions that turned into huge profits for companies and corporations going like, "We can screw a lot of people over and make a lot of money from interest if we convince them they need that newer car."

Lewis Howes 42:29 Mm.

George Kamel 42:29 And look at colleges. What do they do? They raise prices, because you can get as much student loans as you want. Sallie Mae's happy to give you the monopoly money, so colleges go, "Let's double the price. People will pay for it."

Lewis Howes 42:39 Yeah.

George Kamel 42:39 And so because of that, people just have been spending more than they made for a long time now and putting it on the tab and going, "I'll worry about that later."

Lewis Howes 42:46 Okay. What's the second habit?

George Kamel 42:48 The second habit is practicing delayed gratification.

Lewis Howes 42:51 Mm-hmm.

George Kamel 42:51 That- that's a discipline that we have lost in an instant gratification culture.

Lewis Howes 42:55 Right.

George Kamel 42:55 We have instant access 24/7, all the time, in the palm of our hand, two-hour shipping, and that has caused, uh, our brains to just get fried, where we're like, "I can't wait a week. I can't wait 10 years to build wealth."

Lewis Howes 43:09 I need this now.

George Kamel 43:10 I need it now. And we found millionaires are okay with the long term. They're playing the long game, and it's a, that's a very different mentality to have.

Lewis Howes 43:17 They don't need it right now. They can say, "I'm gonna put 10%, or 5%, or a certain amount of dollar amount every month away automatically- ... that I don't need to buy something with this. It's gonna go to my future self.

George Kamel 43:28 Yeah. Or I'm gonna pay cash for that car. That means putting 1,000 bucks away for 24 months-

Lewis Howes 43:34 Wow

George Kamel 43:34 ... to save up for a $24,000 car.

Lewis Howes 43:36 You know, what's interesting, when I moved to... My dad always had used cars until he started to make some real money, then he, then he bought a new car, right? But it wasn't for many, many years. He, like, had that car until he rode it to the, to the last, I guess, mile. And when I moved to LA, I had a million dollars in my account already by the time I moved to LA, I don't know, 12 years ago. I'd built this marketing company up before the podcast. I wasn't, like, mega-millionaire, but I had a million dollars in the account of net worth, right? And I came here, and everyone had these flashy cars, and I was like, "I, I just don't feel the need to try

Lewis Howes 44:14 to live up to some standard in Los Angeles." And I got this car for $4,000 that I drove-

George Kamel 44:21 Wow

Lewis Howes 44:21 ... for the first five years that I lived here. It... And the only reason I got a new car was really for, like, a tax break and to, like, you know, write off on taxes, but this was a 1997, uh, year car.

George Kamel 44:35 Wow.

Lewis Howes 44:35 And I drove it around for five years happy. It didn't have Bluetooth. It didn't have, like... It had a CD player. And I'm like, "Li-

George Kamel 44:42 That's all you need.

Lewis Howes 44:43 That's all I needed. And the radio didn't work. But it was like I don't need some fancy car to feel like-

George Kamel 44:49 Well, you weren't trying to flex.

Lewis Howes 44:50 I wasn't trying to.

George Kamel 44:50 You were focused on what was ahead of you-

Lewis Howes 44:52 Yeah

George Kamel 44:52 ... instead of what was, who the people around you.

Lewis Howes 44:54 Exactly. And it was, it was good enough. It got me around. You know, eventually I was like, "Okay, it's time to, like, upgrade," but not 'cause I felt like I needed to to impress-

George Kamel 45:03 Yeah

Lewis Howes 45:03 ... but because I wanted it, and I felt like-

George Kamel 45:04 It wasn't a flex.

Lewis Howes 45:04 Yeah, exactly. But I think a l-

George Kamel 45:06 That's, that's the third habit.

Lewis Howes 45:07 Really?

George Kamel 45:07 It right there is we found millionaires, they drive four-year-old cars on average, and they're all used.

Lewis Howes 45:12 Really?

George Kamel 45:13 You would think, like, millionaires, well, they can afford the new car, like they can do it, but they don't because they understand that cars are a depreciating asset. Every time you get in that car, it's just going down in value.

Lewis Howes 45:22 Yeah.

George Kamel 45:23 And when you compound that with a car payment, you're paying interest on something going down in value. It's about the dumbest thing you can do, and I, I think it's one of the biggest wealth killers today.

Lewis Howes 45:31 Okay.

George Kamel 45:31 So that's definitely the third habit.

Lewis Howes 45:33 Okay. What's, what's... Uh, getting a used car or what would be...? Okay.

George Kamel 45:37 Yeah. They dri- driving used cars just-

Lewis Howes 45:38 Okay

George Kamel 45:38 ... and that's part of delayed gratification.

Lewis Howes 45:40 Yes.

George Kamel 45:40 It all stems from living on less than you make and delayed gratification.

Lewis Howes 45:43 Okay. And what's the fourth one?

George Kamel 45:45 The most interesting one to me was that 97% of millionaires in the study believe they control their financial destiny. That was a, like... I was shocked they even put that question in the study, but it was such an empowering one because it, it's less about money and it's more about belief.

Lewis Howes 45:59 Mm.

George Kamel 46:00 Like, what the limiting beliefs we have about, like, "Well, I didn't grow up with money. Well, my parents made a money mistake. No, you don't understand. I got baggage, man. I ma- I'm... I made too many mistakes with zeros on the end." And too many people live their life with that Eeyore mentality. But 97% said, "I believe I have a sense of control and autonomy and agency over what happens with my money."

Lewis Howes 46:20 This was, uh, a question from our, our YouTube community. We did a poll, and this was the number one thing they wanted me to ask you. What's the one piece of advice you would give someone feeling completely overwhelmed by their financial situation and seeking a way out of that?

George Kamel 46:37 I'm gonna go with, uh, in the conclusion of my book, I end with a very non-financial answer, and I think it's the right answer for someone like this. And it's the... There's this gap between cynicism and hope.

Lewis Howes 46:51 Mm.

George Kamel 46:51 And I think people have lost hope in America today when it comes to finances. They've resigned themselves to whether I got myself in this mess, or it's someone else's fault, or whatever's happening to me, or the inflation, I believe both are a choice. Like, hope is a choice, and for me, it was the hardest choice.

Lewis Howes 47:08 Yeah.

George Kamel 47:08 'Cause I was cy- I was the guy who was cynical. When I graduated college, I was 23, 40 grand in consumer debt, and I was angry at the world.

Lewis Howes 47:15 Really?

George Kamel 47:15 I was like... I felt lied to 'cause I was like, "I followed this path. I got good grades. I got the degree. Where's my wonderful life? Instead, I'm out here trying to get cashback and get enough Sky Miles to go home for Christmas-

Lewis Howes 47:27 Wow

George Kamel 47:28 ... wondering how I'm gonna achieve my financial goals." And so that to me, I think that's the feeling a lot of people have is this pit of the stomach, lump in the throat hopelessness, and cynicism becomes the easier choice. It's easier to complain and just go like, "Someone's gotta fix my life."

Lewis Howes 47:44 And blame

Lewis Howes 47:45 people-

George Kamel 47:45 Yeah

Lewis Howes 47:45 ... or systems or whatever, yeah.

George Kamel 47:47 So I think it starts with, you know, while, yes, we gotta do, we gotta get on a budget, we gotta make sacrifices, um, we gotta get rid of this debt using the debt snowball, get the emergency fund. Those are the real tactical steps.

Lewis Howes 47:58 Mm.

George Kamel 47:59 But I think it starts with an emotional place where we go, "All right. We cried it out, and then we wake up and we're like, 'We gotta go to work.'" And so the question is the gap between financial stress and financial peace is littered with traps-

Lewis Howes 48:15 Mm

George Kamel 48:15 ... and myths and distractions and noise, and whole life insurance bros trying to sell you on some tax-free wealth strategy. And so what you have to do if that's you is go like, "I'm cutting out all the noise and inputs. I'm gonna follow a proven plan, do one thing at a time with focus intensity, and go all in." And if, listen, if you get out of debt and follow the Ramsey plan and you hate it, you can always go back into debt. The companies will always be ready to hand you more Monopoly money to play with. But I've rarely seen that happen. When people get out of debt, the sacrifice they make to get out, in 18 to 24 months, that's the average it takes to get out, they never go back. They go, "I touched the hot stove. Done with that life. I got goals. I'm not trying to pay lenders for the rest of my life. I'm trying to leave a legacy. I wanna have generational impact." And so that, those are the people that inspire me, are the ones that they start there, but it doesn't end there. And unfortunately, too many of us are willing to live in mediocrity-

Lewis Howes 49:11 Mm

George Kamel 49:11 ... for 30 years instead of sacrificing for three-

Lewis Howes 49:14 Wow

George Kamel 49:14 ... to have freedom for the next 27.

Lewis Howes 49:16 Yeah.

George Kamel 49:16 But it's a, it's a very different lifestyle.

Lewis Howes 49:19 Man.

George Kamel 49:20 So that it takes transformation, and you know how difficult that is. You talk about that a lot on this show.

Lewis Howes 49:24 Yeah. Delayed gratification is one of those key things. A lot of people are willing to sacrifice three years of Delayed gratification and not having all the extra things that their friends are doing, and not going out every weekend, or not going on that trip that they wanted to go on for three years

George Kamel 49:40 You're not getting that house, you're not driving that car

Lewis Howes 49:42 Yeah, man. But

George Kamel 49:43 That's hard

Lewis Howes 49:43 ... if you can, if you can stay committed for a few years of sacrifice and find joy in the small and then big wins, and find joy in doing things for free, or just playing board games-

George Kamel 49:55 Mm

Lewis Howes 49:55 ... with friends, or h- being creative with your time, as opposed to feeling like you always need to spend to enjoy your time, I think you'll, you'll live a much better life.

George Kamel 50:04 That's the heart of all this. It's, it's discontentment and FOMO, right?

Lewis Howes 50:07 Yeah.

George Kamel 50:07 It's fear of missing out. And what I talk about in the book is JOMO. It's the joy of missing out.

Lewis Howes 50:11 Yeah.

George Kamel 50:11 It's the joy of going like, "Dude, I don't care about all that. I'm running my own race." And the problem with running other people's race is that there is no finish line. Like, when you're trying to keep up with someone else, well, they have a whole different life.

Lewis Howes 50:23 Mm.

George Kamel 50:24 And they have different goals, and so why are you trying to keep up with these people that you don't really care about all that much?

Lewis Howes 50:29 Right.

George Kamel 50:29 And so if you really have strong friends in your, in your corner, they're gonna be cheering you on and going like, "Dude, I totally get it. I'll come over tonight. I'll bring a pizza. We'll hang."

Lewis Howes 50:38 Mm.

George Kamel 50:38 We don't have to go out to the bar.

Lewis Howes 50:40 Right, right.

George Kamel 50:40 You know what I mean? And so that takes a level of sacrifice, especially when you're young. 'Cause when you're young, it's all about, like, "These are the best years of my life. I can't skip that vacation." But man, just two years out of the next 40, if you can sacrifice, it changes everything.

Lewis Howes 50:54 Yes.

George Kamel 50:55 It changes the trajectory of your life.

Lewis Howes 50:56 Mm.

George Kamel 50:57 And so that's what I, I hope people are willing to do at the end of this.

Lewis Howes 51:00 How does, how does someone create that belief that they can have control over their money?

George Kamel 51:04 I think it starts with dealing with the, their

George Kamel 51:07 past. I mean, our friend Dr. John Delony has a book called Own Your Past, Change Your Future. And you have to own the shame, and the guilt, and the baggage, and the mistakes, and the hurt, and the financial trauma, and your parents divorced, and it was money stress, and money fights, and you took on all this debt, and so who are you to ever build wealth and become debt-free? You have to grapple with that and go like, "That's not who I am. Those are things that happened. And yes, they may have happened to me, but that's not gonna control my destiny." And so that, it starts with that, realizing that, "This is my past. That's fine. That's not where I'm headed." And so we always say the windshield is bigger than the rear view mirror for a reason.

Lewis Howes 51:43 Mm.

George Kamel 51:43 So if you can start looking ahead going, "Regardless and in spite of all of that, I am going to change my family tree," that's what we call it, build generational wealth, break the cycles and chains that have come before me. Those people are the ones that inspire me every day when they call the show, and they didn't come from money, they didn't come from trust funds. They came from broken homes and little incomes, and they overcame.

Lewis Howes 52:05 Yeah.

George Kamel 52:05 Those are the heroes.

Lewis Howes 52:06 Yeah, I think I saw someone at, th- earlier this week, a woman come on the show say she got out, like, 300,000 in debt in, like, 18 months or something-

George Kamel 52:14 Whoa

Lewis Howes 52:15 ... on your show.

George Kamel 52:16 Yeah.

Lewis Howes 52:16 And I, uh, and I c- maybe it was 300, maybe it was 170, 170,000 I think it was, that she got out of debt in 18 months. And the amount of peace that she had in her facial expression and her body language around being debt-free from these, I guess, bad debts, uh, really looked empowering on what she was capable of doing now without that debt weighing her down. A- and I'm curious, before we get into the next, uh, the fifth habit, how does someone develop that, that belief that c- they can pay down their debts if it seems so daunting and so overwhelming?

George Kamel 52:56 Realizing that you're not alone I think is a really important step. Too many people feel like, "Well, my situation's different, and I'm unique, and I'm special, and they don't get it." But then I meet people every day, and I get in a Financial Peace University class, and there's all these other people who made money mistakes. And I go, "Oh, I'm not alone. I'm not a, I'm not the only idiot out there."

Lewis Howes 53:14 Yeah.

George Kamel 53:14 "I'm not the only average George out there." That to me is encouraging because it tells me that this path is something that other people have done before me, that will come after me-

Lewis Howes 53:24 Mm

George Kamel 53:24 ... and that I can do this, too. And so I think it's important to get other people around you, and that might mean cutting out some toxic friends-

Lewis Howes 53:30 Right, right

George Kamel 53:30 ... who are not trying to be on that journey.

Lewis Howes 53:32 Sure.

George Kamel 53:32 Finding people who aren't trying to live on less than they make, that's an important piece. And the other piece is feeling progress, and that's why I think those baby steps are so important. When you start with just, hey, 1,000 bucks, can you get 1,000 bucks? Most of us would say, "Yeah, I can sell some stuff. I can get this second job. I can, you know, not eat out this month." Now it's like, all right, let's attack that consumer debt, debt snowball, smallest to largest. Let's just attack the small debt. Can we just do that? One thing at a time. We're not saving. We're not investing. We're just gonna do one thing at a time.

Lewis Howes 54:01 Right.

George Kamel 54:01 And that to me is what builds that hope, and builds that progress and momentum, and keeps you motivated on the journey. You have to have a little win early on, or else you give up.

Lewis Howes 54:10 Yeah, that's good. And what about the fifth habit?

George Kamel 54:13 Ooh, the fifth habit is so boring that, and unsexy-

Lewis Howes 54:18 [laughs]

George Kamel 54:19 ... that it will upset you. But it is getting on the budget. It's making a plan. And what I found was that budgets are not for broke people. Budgets are not for wealthy people. Budgets are for intentional people. That was

George Kamel 54:32 a game changer for me 'cause I always thought, like, we have to be a super nerd and love Excel, or you have to be, like, really broke 'cause you think budget, you think this person's real frugal, and stingy, and cheap, and they can't spend anything. You say, "I'm on a budget," that means I can't go out with your fr- with the friends.

Lewis Howes 54:44 Right.

George Kamel 54:44 But to me, it's just putting a plan on paper and looking at reality, going, "My income is 5,000. I need to spend... I'm gonna make a plan for every single dollar," 'cause otherwise, what happens? Dollars float away. You go, "Where do, where ha- oh my gosh, we spent 600 bucks eating out this month DoorDashing a burrito." You know? All of that unintentional spending and impulse leads to you not hitting financial goals.

Lewis Howes 55:06 Yeah. So it's not... It, it's conscious spending habits. It's being aware of w- where you're spending your money. Um, there was a quote in here. Let me see this quote real quick 'cause I saw this based on budgeting. Um-

George Kamel 55:20 Yeah, I had a whole chapter on b- on, uh, called Budgeting is Freedom.

Lewis Howes 55:23 Yeah.

George Kamel 55:23 That's the first one in the Breaking Free section to help people.

Lewis Howes 55:26 Yeah, and the quote on that is from John Maxwell, said, "A budget is telling your money where to go instead of wondering where it went." And I think a lot of people aren't conscious- ... about their spending habits, and they're not intentional about where they want their money to go. They buy things based on impulse and based on pleasure and based on desire, and then they realize, like, "Oh, I don't have as much money as I thought I had," 'cause they're not intentional about it. How often should we be looking at all of our accounts? Should this be a daily thing? Should it be monthly? Is it too, is it, you know, is it too much to look at it, where it's an obsession and you're over-obsessing, versus, like, a natural flow? What do you think?

George Kamel 56:05 Yeah, that's a great question. Well, we tell people to make a budget every month, and so actually creating the budget on paper before the next month begins is key. So that'll happen one time. And if you've got a spouse, you need to do that together with a l- a quick budget meeting. This is not a four-hour, you know, Lord of the Rings saga here. This is going, "Hey, what's going on this month? Hey, we got that birthday party. We gotta get that gift for this thing. Remember, we have that vacation coming up. Let's start saving." And so that's all it is. But as far as tracking your transactions, 'cause that's a really important part of the budget people forget to do. Looks great on paper, and then we just spend the rest of the month and hope. Fingers crossed we have money in the account at the end of the month and don't overdraft. That's most people. But tracking your transactions is a key, and you wanna do that, uh, once every day or other day. And again, if you do it once or every other day, it's like cleaning your room.

Lewis Howes 56:51 Mm.

George Kamel 56:51 You don't ever have to clean your room if you just-

Lewis Howes 56:52 I-

George Kamel 56:53 ... tidy up real quick

Lewis Howes 56:53 ... sure.

George Kamel 56:54 And so with EveryDollar, our budgeting app, this is as easy as just dragging the transaction. Like Ama- Amazon, drag it up to shopping. We're done. And so when you do that, you can actually see, do we have any money left for X, Y, Z?

Lewis Howes 57:08 Mm.

George Kamel 57:08 Or, hey, we're over budget, we gotta figure something out. We gotta sacrifice, we gotta cut this category here. What most people do is just overspend in four different categories, and they go, "We're 1,000 bucks over, and we put it on the credit card."

Lewis Howes 57:20 Mm.

George Kamel 57:20 "We'll figure it out next month." And that's why it's important to not only do a budget, but to use your own money. And I only have a, I have a, one debit card, and I use cash occasionally. That's it.

Lewis Howes 57:29 Wow.

George Kamel 57:29 My life is very simple in that way. And I have my business, my Ramsey business debit card as well.

Lewis Howes 57:35 What do you say to people that s- that say, you know, [clears throat] "Well, I love having a credit card because it allows me to get points for flights," or, you know, whatever it might be, uh, for other perks, "and if I'm tracking

Lewis Howes 57:47 it just like I would a debit card, then I'm missing out on all these other perks"?

George Kamel 57:50 Mm. Well, I found the people who actually could stand to benefit and actually have any meaningful rewards make enough money and spend enough that they don't need the rewards. So it's kind of hilarious at that point to be like, if you make $150,000, the $1,000 in rewards is not changing your life whatsoever.

Lewis Howes 58:08 Right, no.

George Kamel 58:08 And the mental calories you're spending to play the game and maximize is not worth your time. And so I break down, there's, in, in chapter three on credit cards, I break down eight different character archetypes that I found with credit cards.

Lewis Howes 58:19 Wow.

George Kamel 58:19 And so there was the rewards redeemer.

Lewis Howes 58:21 Mm-hmm.

George Kamel 58:21 There's the world traveler, the person that's like, "I gotta have my airline miles."

Lewis Howes 58:24 Right.

George Kamel 58:24 And I break down, you gotta spend $50,000 in order, in order to get your $250 flight, but you don't even know that, 'cause what do they give you? Points and miles. What is 100,000 miles? We don't know anymore. The credit card companies wanna confuse us. And I found this out from an ex-Capital One employee. She told me verbatim that these credit card companies run 10,000 experiments a year on consumers and A/B test them to go, "Oh, if we switch it from cash back to points, it triggers something different in their brain. It's like Chuck E. Cheese."

Lewis Howes 58:56 Wow.

George Kamel 58:56 You're like, "I don't know what 100,000 points is, but it feels like a lot."

Lewis Howes 58:59 Right.

George Kamel 58:59 "Let's sign up for the bonus."

Lewis Howes 58:59 That's like two candy bars. Yeah. [laughs]

George Kamel 59:01 Exactly. So most people, they're stepping over a dollar to hopefully pick up a quarter.

Lewis Howes 59:05 Wow.

George Kamel 59:06 And the average credit card interest rate now is 22% APR.

Lewis Howes 59:09 Wow.

George Kamel 59:09 But we're doing all this in hopes of getting 2% cash back. You're like, is it worth spending 100 bucks to get two bucks?

Lewis Howes 59:15 Mm.

George Kamel 59:16 What they tell me is, "Well, I'm not spending any differently than if it was my own money." I'm like, "You wanna bet? Here's $1,000 cash of your own money. Go hand over $1,000 and see the emotional pain it causes."

Lewis Howes 59:27 Right.

George Kamel 59:27 And so adding friction back into our life will actually help us spend less, and that's what happens when you use cash especially. But even a debit card, your brain knows-

Lewis Howes 59:35 This is coming right out of my account

George Kamel 59:36 ... that's Lewis's money-

Lewis Howes 59:37 Yeah, yeah

George Kamel 59:37 ... right now. And so in the book, the thesis of that chapter is when it hurts, when it hurts less, it costs more.

Lewis Howes 59:42 Mm.

George Kamel 59:43 When we remove the friction, you're going to spend more. And I, I quote MIT studies using fMRI technology on the brain, and they're seeing when people swipe that credit card, it releases the brakes on spending and hits the accelerator.

Lewis Howes 59:55 Really?

George Kamel 59:56 And so it's like both and. And every study shows you spend more when you swipe that card. And so I try to hit every single objection here, 'cause we've heard-

Lewis Howes 1:00:04 Yeah

George Kamel 1:00:04 ... so much on the Ramsey Show. What if I paid... The, the perfect spender's the first one in there. "I never pay a dime in interest. What's wrong with using my credit card?" You know, all of those excuses.

Lewis Howes 1:00:13 Pay it off every month, all the different things. Yeah.

George Kamel 1:00:15 Yeah. But even then, think about it. You could have zero bucks in the bank at the end of that month. You're not building wealth just because-

Lewis Howes 1:00:20 Mm

George Kamel 1:00:21 ... you have a zero credit card balance. I want people to build wealth-

Lewis Howes 1:00:25 Sure

George Kamel 1:00:25 ... not just play the game perfectly of Capital One.

Lewis Howes 1:00:28 In these key habits that George talked about, I'd love for you to share your biggest takeaway from the habit that resonated with you the most, or one that you tried that's worked for you. Share that below in the comments. But for me, I really like the idea of delayed gratification. We live in a instant gratification world where it just seems like everyone wants to live up to the richest person on Instagram and look like they live that lifestyle, or they feel like they're not enough if they don't have that. But I really love the idea of feeling and being more with less. Literally, this morning

Lewis Howes 1:00:59 I just got rid of, like, half my wardrobe in my closet. It's not about having more, it's about having the things that make you feel free, that make you feel light, that make you feel full, and not just constantly filling with more things just to have more things. I'm a big fan of being financially free and creating freedom within yourself first before you have money. You hear from so many different experts that I've had on on this show that money won't make you happy by itself. You have to do the work within you and follow the different habits to also make you happy as well. So yes, it will help solve money problems, but it doesn't mean it's gonna solve emotional problems that you have with yourself or people in your life. So I love this idea of kind of delayed gratification and just focusing on the journey, focusing on the process, and celebrating those moments as they come, small or big, as you build your wealth and create more money. So very excited about that. Again, leave your big takeaway below on this one. Now, moving into this final clip, this was one of the most p- Popular YouTube videos of the year. It's full of insights and emotion from a very popular person online and in the business world named Patrick Bet-David, and he is a force in the business world creating incredible content. You probably follow him or watch him, or you've seen his clips online. And in this interview, he gets emotional. I don't think he's ever gotten emotional in another video, in another clip, in another interview, and he talks about how he's done thousands of these interviews, and he never gets emotional. But he explains what our thoughts about money should be framed as it's so valuable. He talks about how this should be framed and why that's so valuable. And there's a moment that resonated with me from this interview where Patrick mentions that money wants to be respected, not loved. And when you think about that, ask yourself, "Am I respecting money or am I loving money?" And this is such a powerful mindset to have. And when you think of money, do you fear it or are you obsessed with it? Being able to respect money is the key to attracting more abundance, but most of us love it or desire it, or we fear it and we're afraid of it. So I'm excited to hear your thoughts on it after this, so let's dive in. What if you had that fire again five, 10 years away where it was... You felt like you were supposed to be doing something else, but you thought, "Oh, this is gonna ruin everything. My... Like, literally my business will end, right? Everything that I've built will be over if I choose to do what I feel God is telling me to do." After years of resisting and pushing in and deleting and cutting the next thing, whatever that is, how would you feel if you lost it all but you had the favor of one?

Patrick Bet-David 1:03:42 I don't care. I'm good. I, I don't care. I don't care. Oh, man, what a question you're asking me. [crying] If... Yeah. [sighs] Yeah.

Lewis Howes 1:04:15 All the money, all the business, all the-

Patrick Bet-David 1:04:16 Oh, wait, let me tell you, man

Lewis Howes 1:04:17 ... the Yankees, the everything you've dreamed.

Patrick Bet-David 1:04:19 Dude, you know, um, when my wife and I... What the hell is this all about? Fricking A. I do a million interviews, and this never happens. Um, no, it's changed my life. Uh, [sighs] ah.

Lewis Howes 1:04:38 You guys grab a tissue if you've got a tissue box out there.

Patrick Bet-David 1:04:48 No, man. Ah. This is so annoying. But you know what?

Lewis Howes 1:04:55 Real, man. I mean, it's not annoying. It's, it's, it's how you feel.

Patrick Bet-David 1:04:58 I'm, I'm-

Lewis Howes 1:04:58 And I think it's a beautiful thing to, for people to know that y- what you care about so deeply. Yes, you are a killer in business, and yes, you are a media... You know, you're building a media empire, and yes, you're talented, but it... for people to know how much you care about God and your relationship to God and how much you love.

Patrick Bet-David 1:05:20 You know the gifts He's given me, my wife and I, we have three kids

Patrick Bet-David 1:05:24 at the time, and she comes home, and she says she wants a fourth. I said, "Really?" "Yeah." "Okay. You want a fourth? I thought you said you're done." When she was pregnant with Senna, we're having dinner at Fleming's in Preston Hollow, Highland Park, and we're out on her birthday, February 14th, Valentine's Day, and she says, "Babe, I want one gift from you." I said, "What's that?" "I don't want you to pressure me to have any more kids." I said, "Babe, I don't wanna talk about it right now." She says, "No, we gotta talk about it." Says, "I just want that gift from you. I don't want any more. This is too much for me."

Lewis Howes 1:05:57 You said this.

Patrick Bet-David 1:05:58 She's saying it to me.

Lewis Howes 1:05:59 Yeah.

Patrick Bet-David 1:06:00 And I said-

Lewis Howes 1:06:02 Huh

Patrick Bet-David 1:06:02 ... "Interesting. So I have a hard time receiving that because we talked about five kids before we got married. Hundred and one questions to ask before we get engaged."

Lewis Howes 1:06:14 So she had already made an agreement, commitment, and now-

Patrick Bet-David 1:06:15 Y'all already made the agreement, so this is a problem. So watch what happens because you're not in charge. God is in charge. So then we have Senna, first daughter, first kid I ever cried. My two boys were born. I was very happy. But Senna, I cried.

Lewis Howes 1:06:31 Wow.

Patrick Bet-David 1:06:31 First time Senna. I held Senna was freaking life-changing. It was different. So then she tells me this in, in the house in Plano, she says, "I want a fourth." "So you want a fourth baby?" "I do." "You want a fourth baby?" "I do." "Huh. You sure?" "Yeah." "Positive?" "Yeah." And she's crying. I mean, dude, I don't... I'm... You wanna go right now? Like, what do you wanna do? I'm... I want a fourth.

Lewis Howes 1:06:57 [laughs]

Patrick Bet-David 1:06:57 I want a fifth. So then she's pregnant. She says, "Babe, I'm pregnant." "No way." "Yes." We go to the doctor. Pregnant, yeah. Awesome. Then we go to kinda see where it's like week eight or nine, whatever. "So I got news for you." "What?" "You're having twins." "No." "Yeah." I'm laughing so hard. She's crying because we said five, and we're gonna have five. So ecstatic. We come back, testing every week, all this stuff, and at week 10, um, we go, and the doctor says we have a problem. One of the kids is, uh, uh, is, uh, what do you call it? Not, um... Could potentially be, um, not fully developed.

Lewis Howes 1:07:47 Yes.

Patrick Bet-David 1:07:47 What's the word for it where, uh-

Lewis Howes 1:07:50 De- deformation or-

Patrick Bet-David 1:07:51 Yeah. There... It's, it's not gonna be... It's gonna, it's gonna be a kid you're gonna be having problems with for the rest of your life.

Lewis Howes 1:07:56 Hmm.

Patrick Bet-David 1:07:57 And we're like, "Oh my God, what do you want us to do?" And so they come in, and they're having a meeting, and they're telling you all this stuff. You know, it could be this, it could be that, it could be this. Like, okay, interesting Then we go home, and it still hasn't hit us whether this is gonna happen or not. And then we sit down and we start watching videos, raising a ch- a child that is, you know-

Lewis Howes 1:08:23 Uh, disabilities of some type, yeah

Patrick Bet-David 1:08:25 ... disabilities and all this stuff, and how it affects kids. And every night for four weeks, we're dealing with this. What do we do? What do we not do? Do we go through this? Do we go through that?

Lewis Howes 1:08:34 And she's, like, what? Two, three months pregnant at this time, or...?

Patrick Bet-David 1:08:36 Yeah, she's two, three months pregnant at... Pregnant... 11, 12 weeks pregnant at this time. And, uh, they said, "You know, you could have a problem with this, and you have to accept, do you wanna do this?" And doctor's recommending, "Hey, my recommendation is, you know, if you guys don't risk it, you know, y- the average person would abort because it's gonna affect your family. This is gonna affect this. It's gonna affect... You're 42 years old. You're no longer 35 years old or 32 years old." So then we go in and we finally accept the fact that, you know, it's God's doing, we're good. Let's roll. We go in. Two weeks later, one of them doesn't make it.

Lewis Howes 1:09:11 Mm.

Patrick Bet-David 1:09:12 Now, we don't know which one didn't make it. So they're saying there's most likely the one that didn't make it isn't the healthy one, but you don't know till the baby's born.

Lewis Howes 1:09:21 Really?

Patrick Bet-David 1:09:22 Yeah. So we're like, "Well, you know..." They're giving these percentages and all this stuff. "Uh, we suggest you do this, and we're

Patrick Bet-David 1:09:28 researching. No, you shouldn't do that because it can hurt the kid that's left, and that kid can get hurt if you go and try to do this procedure with the needle that..." All this stuff they got. I'm like, "Dude, just..." So anyways, eventually we're just praying, and Brooklyn is born. Brooklyn Ivy Bet-David. Brooklyn is the most animated kid we have in our family, and, uh, her twin, the brother, didn't make it. But Brooklyn is the most animated kid in the family, and she changed everything. I can't imagine, Lewis, living life never meeting Brooklyn.

Lewis Howes 1:09:58 Wow.

Patrick Bet-David 1:09:59 I can't imagine that. Like, you know, to me, when people say, "Well, we just wanna have one," I said, "Dude, you don't even know. You got two more. You can't wait to meet. Life's gonna change you. Go for the three and four. If you're able to do it, if your doctor says you're healthy, go for it." Why am I giving you that story? Because, you know, when we moved to Boca, Florida, the first month I was going through a lot. We're moving people. I'm by myself. Did I make the right decision? Should I have stayed? You're leaving a company you haven't even sold yet, and all you're doing it for is because of this. Did you make the right move? Your wife and kid, they're living in here in this house. You're renting, and your 100 employees at PHP are in Addison, Texas. You're in Bo- So every night at 11:00, Mario and I would walk. He can tell you stories himself and give you a complete different perspective, and I would listen to Amazing Grace by this lady that sings it, and the... It's a picture, the thumbnail of the video, and I would listen to Amazing Grace. It's got, like, 70 million views.

Lewis Howes 1:10:53 Wow.

Patrick Bet-David 1:10:53 And I would just listen to it on repeat. Um, and-

Lewis Howes 1:10:55 It's a photo on YouTube

Patrick Bet-David 1:10:56 ... it's, it's, it's a photo, but it's a song.

Lewis Howes 1:10:58 It's a song, but it's with a photo, yes

Patrick Bet-David 1:10:58 ... but the thumbnail is just a photo, right? And it starts with the sound of rain, and then she sings. It's the best voice for Amazing Grace for me. There's a lot of great ones. Nothing comes close to this lady here. I'll give you her name afterwards.

Lewis Howes 1:11:09 Yeah.

Patrick Bet-David 1:11:09 Matter of fact, I wanna give it because if the audience wants to listen to it, I don't want them-

Lewis Howes 1:11:11 Yeah

Patrick Bet-David 1:11:11 ... to miss out on this great opportunity. So I listen to this thing every day for one hour while walking, and Lewis, I'm in tears. Amazing Grace, it's called Best Version by Far: The Hour I First Believed is what it says on the cover. It's five minutes and 14 seconds. It takes about 45 seconds till she starts singing and the rain sound comes, but worth listening to it. So I'm crying, and I'm... I probably talked to God the most during that month, and I said, "God, I think I made the right decision, but, uh, you know, I need your help right now. I need you to be here with me." The amount of times this man's done what he's done for me, I owe my entire life to him.

Lewis Howes 1:11:53 Wow.

Patrick Bet-David 1:11:53 Are you kidding me? Like, you... He can take me today. That's my weak spot. He, he's, uh, he's done a lot for me.

Lewis Howes 1:12:01 Wow.

Patrick Bet-David 1:12:01 My life's been a great life. Iran was tough, you know, all these other things was different, but, um, life's been a great life.

Lewis Howes 1:12:08 Wow.

Patrick Bet-David 1:12:09 Yeah.

Lewis Howes 1:12:09 I wanted to ask you kind of... I'm loving this part of the conversation, by the way, but I, I feel like people are gonna wanna learn about money and the mindset of money in a big way because I feel like you've been pretty fearless in how you've approached money, and I've heard your story, you know, many different times about, you know, the bodybuilding days, being broke, and getting on a sales job, and all these different things. But what is it you think that blocks people from making money the most? Is it mental? Is it an emotional thing that blocks them? What holds people back from earning more or making more?

Patrick Bet-David 1:12:45 Well, I mean, i- one of them is, uh, whatever you hate, uh, or you don't respect, you're not gonna get. So if you don't respect rich people, you're not gonna be rich. If you don't respect people who make a lot of money and you always talk trash about

Patrick Bet-David 1:13:00 them behind their backs, you're, you're not gonna be that person. You're just not. If you admire somebody that's a great executive and an earner and recreating themselves, then guess what? You'll eventually make that money. So, you know, uh, m- money and success is not attracted to people that talk down to them, just like anyb- anything else. They're not attracted to you. They, they want to be, uh, respected. Money wants to be respected. Uh, not loved, but money wants to be respected. It wants you to say, "You know what? I respect what we can do with money and how much power you can bring to my family. I respect it. What do I need to do to get more of it?" Well, guess what? Right now, your market value is $68,000 per year. You wanna improve it? I do. Here's what you gotta do. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Okay, great, and, and the way of making money, for the longest time, you know, everybody wants to say entrepreneurship, entrepreneur- entrepreneurship, entrepreneurship. There's many other ways of making it. You can... That's one way to go. You can be a creator. You know, MrBeast has proven the fact that you can be a billionaire by being a YouTuber. The guy's got 300, 400 million subscribers. Probably by the time this video comes out, he's at 500 million subscribers-

Lewis Howes 1:14:05 Right

Patrick Bet-David 1:14:05 ... the way he's growing. You can make a lot of money being a YouTuber, talent, creator, behind the scenes, you know, growing a company to the next level, sales, you know, communication, executive, leadership. But no matter what you do, I don't care what you do- Whatever business you're in, I'm interested in learning skill sets that are evergreen to 100% of industries.

Lewis Howes 1:14:27 Mm. What are those skill sets?

Patrick Bet-David 1:14:28 What is that? Let's talk about that. So one is leadership, okay? In every environment... Like, we had a, a, a, we have a team of 30 people in our production team at the office, right? And there was a lot of chaos two weeks ago, three weeks ago, and I held a meeting. In a meeting I held, I'm watching to see who's showing signs of leadership on what's gonna happen. This is an opportunity for them to show who's the leader. And then the person you weren't expecting stood up-

Lewis Howes 1:14:56 Mm

Patrick Bet-David 1:14:56 ... and the person you were expecting to lead is kinda like quiet and not saying anything. Well, maybe this guy's not a leader. He's a technical expert, but he's not a leader. This person is not technically as an ex- as much of an expert as this person, but this guy knows how to bring everybody together and get, you know, all the productions to be done on time, delivered high quality thumbnails, everything. That guy's a better leader, even though technically he's not as good as this. The market pays for great leaders. So whether I'm a assistant, whether I'm an executive assistant, whether I'm a, a salesperson, whether I'm a coder and editor, whether I'm a, you know, in the military, whether I'm a cop, firefighter, politician, a, an athlete, it does not matter. Steve Kerr wasn't technically the best player, but he's one of the best coaches in the league today, right? So why is he where he's at? Because of leadership, right? So leadership is what? Getting people to do things they wouldn't do on their own and setting a great example. Great. So that means you have to be able to do what? You have to learn how to build relationships with people to win 'em over. You have to be able to give tough news, bad news, direct news in a gentle way where it's received. You have to be able to bring people together. You have to be able to challenge people, poke 'em, you know, challenge 'em, have the tough conversations with them, manage expectations with them, challenge 'em to recreate themselves when they hit a plateau. We had a talent dinner this week, two nights ago, at the house. I brought everybody over and I brought my chiropractor over. Everybody got adjustments at the end till God knows what time.

Lewis Howes 1:16:34 [laughs]

Patrick Bet-David 1:16:35 But we're sitting there with the talent dinner and I said, "Guys, there's one word I want you to be thinking about going into 2024. I want everybody here to keep this one word as their MO, is to recreate yourself going into 2024." And I gave them goals, what I want Valuetainment to happen, what I want Valuetainment Comedy to do, what I want this to do and that to do and this to do, and all this other stuff that we got. But what's the most annoying thing about recreating yourself? The most annoying thing about recreating yourself is you have to accept the fact that the current you is not good enough for the next level.

Lewis Howes 1:17:06 Mm.

Patrick Bet-David 1:17:07 Nobody likes that because whenever you get good at the level you're at, you kind of have this warm, fuzzy feeling. You're getting the accolades.

Lewis Howes 1:17:13 Yes.

Patrick Bet-David 1:17:13 You're getting the respect. You're getting the fame. You're like, "Look at me. I'm so special." But to go to the next level, it's like, "Oh my God, nobody here cares about my success. I am so small here." But that's what... You're not good enough for the next level.

Lewis Howes 1:17:23 Right.

Patrick Bet-David 1:17:23 So what do I need to do to recreate myself to get to that next level? Do I need to read more? Do I need to study more? Do I need to watch myself more? Do I need to sit down with other people that know me well and ask them to give me, you know, very sincere direction?

Lewis Howes 1:17:38 Yeah.

Patrick Bet-David 1:17:38 Do I need to hire somebody to, you know, uh, give me feedback? What do I need to be doing? Do I need to-

Lewis Howes 1:17:43 What, what is that for you? What do you need to reinvent next year for yourself?

Patrick Bet-David 1:17:46 For me?

Lewis Howes 1:17:47 Yeah.

Patrick Bet-David 1:17:47 Oh, it's, it's just hiring tens. What do I need to do to hire tens? I, I read, uh, this book by Stephen Schwarzman. Uh, I think it's called Whatever It Takes, or it's a Blue Book. Blue, uh, uh, Blue Book billionaire, 20, $30 billion guy. This is the Blackstone guy. Phenomenal. Phenomenal. They used to be partners with Larry Fink, and they had a falling out, and that's how BlackRock and Blackstone got started. One of them wanted to give equity to all their employees. The other one kinda didn't wanna do it. They wanted different structures. Both of them are very successful. But Schwarzman talks about what happened to their company when they started hiring tens.

Lewis Howes 1:18:21 Mm.

Patrick Bet-David 1:18:22 And there's a difference between you think a person is a 10, and then a person is a 10. That person could be an eight and a half, but in your world, you've never hired an eight and a half.

Lewis Howes 1:18:30 They feel like a 10 for you, yeah.

Patrick Bet-David 1:18:31 So to you, that's a 10. But that's an eight and a half in a Blackstone.

Lewis Howes 1:18:34 Yeah. [laughs]

Patrick Bet-David 1:18:35 That's an eight and a half in maybe, you know, uh, in Apple or something like that. But in your company, they're, they're a 10 today. So I, I know the power of getting people that are smarter and sharper to bring 'em in here. So right now we're hiring a lot of people. That means we have to pay bigger salaries. That means we have to be creative on our comp. That means we have to have a better offering. We have to bring better brains. And right now, I, I, I just see a big opportunity with Bet- David Consulting. We have the first three phases are squared away. The last two phases are gonna come here the next 24 to 36 months. Very excited about that. And, uh, so, so to me is we're getting the most random people right now applying at Valuetainment, people that are super qualified from executives at Disney that are... I won't give the position 'cause then you'll Google who it is, and it's that person. You know, executives at Apple who are very happy with what happened, but they wanna be part of a company that's gonna go from zero to, you know, the next level, and they wanna bring that value to it, and they see it, and they kinda like some of the philosophies that we stand for. But now it's about, do we wanna spend the money to get these guys?

Lewis Howes 1:19:44 Mm.

Patrick Bet-David 1:19:45 How do we got to create... Uh, how do we need to create the environment to have the upside for them to come here? Do we have the climate? Our benefits plan right now is solid. Very good benefits

Patrick Bet-David 1:19:53 package that we're offering, 401 [k] , health insurance. But everything's about creating the right climate to attract and retain them with us long-term to take the companies to the next level.

Lewis Howes 1:20:05 Mm-hmm.

Patrick Bet-David 1:20:05 So that's probably my biggest obsession.

Lewis Howes 1:20:07 Right climate, meaning the right climate and culture, kind of that type of environment?

Patrick Bet-David 1:20:11 Cli- climate like-

Lewis Howes 1:20:11 The whole environment?

Patrick Bet-David 1:20:11 Yes. Culture, benefits package. One of the reasons why I moved away from Dallas and I went to Fort Lauderdale instead of even going to Tampa, 'cause at first I was looking at Tampa, then I was gonna go to M- uh- Uh, um, Manalapan and Palm Beach, and I was gonna go to Miami. And then I said, "We're gonna make Fort Lauderdale the Burbank of East Coast is what we're gonna do."

Lewis Howes 1:20:30 Wow.

Patrick Bet-David 1:20:31 We're gonna make Fort Lauderdale the Burbank of East Coast. So-

Lewis Howes 1:20:34 That's cool

Patrick Bet-David 1:20:34 ... I chose that because it's easy to recruit people to Florida. It's not that easy to recruit creatives to Dallas, but you can recruit creatives to LA. Why are people still in LA?

Lewis Howes 1:20:45 Mm-hmm.

Patrick Bet-David 1:20:46 Give me a better weather than a place like this and a climate and wader- water, all this stuff. But Florida, if Texas and California had a baby, it's Florida. Florida gives you the best of both worlds, so that part was intentional to be able to recruit talent to move there.

Lewis Howes 1:21:02 Okay. Again, I'm a big fan of Patrick Bet-David. Let me know your biggest takeaway below in the comments around money, what he talked about. For me, the concept of being a leader in your life and leading your vision. Money wants to be respected, right? And when you are clear on your vision in your life, it doesn't mean you have to have some massive big goals, and you have to, like, conquer the world. But if you're just clear, then you are respecting yourself, and you're taking the actions towards that vision. When you're unclear and you're a wanderer, money doesn't wanna come to a wanderer. It comes and goes pretty quickly. But when you're clear and you have a direction and you're moving towards that direction, you make better decisions with your money, and therefore, you usually are able to attract and create more of it because people can see you as a clear leader in your life. Doesn't mean you have to be a leader of some big company, but a person who leads themselves clearly is a respected individual if they continue to live in accordance to that vision and live up to it. Again, I'd love to hear your biggest takeaway from these different four experts on money, on attracting abundance, on the psychology of money, how to make money, and we have all the links to the full episodes below in the description as well. But leave a comment on your biggest takeaway. What spoke to you? What resonated with you the most about money? And what's your biggest challenge with money right now? I'd love to hear your challenges as well. Let me know, again, if there's one person in your life you can think of, a friend, a family member, someone that you're close to who's struggling with money, send them this link to this video or episode and ask them to give you feedback on their biggest takeaway as well. Have a conversation with someone so you can build your money conversations together and start creating and attracting more together. I hope you enjoyed this episode, this format about the psychology of making and manifesting more money and creating abundance in your life. Make sure to subscribe. Again, share it with a friend, and I'll see you soon.

Patrick Bet-David 1:23:00 In my opinion, there's three main skills in business in general. You gotta learn how to sell, you gotta learn how to build, and you gotta learn, learn how to lead. So you gotta learn how to get people to give you money for stuff, gotta have the stuff to sell them, and then you gotta have people that work on your side to help deliver on those other two. If you can do those three

Patrick Bet-David 1:23:16 things, you're unstoppable, and if you do one of those three things