The Key to Abundance and Success: Lisa Nichols and Lewis Howes

1. 0:00 – 0:04

   Intro

   1. LHLewis Howes0:00

      [upbeat music]

2. 0:04 – 3:15

   Track Days and Grandmother Bernice's Lessons

   1. LHLewis Howes0:04

      Welcome, everyone, to the School of Greatness Podcast. Very excited about our guest today, Lisa Nichols. Thanks so much for being here.

   2. LNLisa Nichols0:09

      Thank you for having me.

   3. LHLewis Howes0:10

      Appreciate it.

   4. LNLisa Nichols0:10

      Yeah.

   5. LHLewis Howes0:11

      Yes.

   6. LNLisa Nichols0:11

      I'm excited.

   7. LHLewis Howes0:12

      You got a new book out. I'm just gonna show it to the camera really quick. Make sure you guys check this book out. We'll have it linked up. It's called Abundance Now: Amplify Your Life and Achieve Prosperity Today, and I'm very excited about this. I was just going through it, and I love your message.

   8. LNLisa Nichols0:25

      Thank you.

   9. LHLewis Howes0:25

      I love your insights. I love your wisdom, and I also love your story, and I want to dive into it before-

   10. LNLisa Nichols0:31

       Yeah

   11. LHLewis Howes0:31

       ... we begin the process of how to be abundant, because you didn't start out abundant, right?

   12. LNLisa Nichols0:35

       [laughs] No, not at all. [laughs] No.

   13. LHLewis Howes0:37

       So what were... And you're also a track star from what our agent tells me.

   14. LNLisa Nichols0:40

       I know.

   15. LHLewis Howes0:41

       Yes.

   16. LNLisa Nichols0:41

       How'd you know that?

   17. LHLewis Howes0:42

       [laughs]

   18. LNLisa Nichols0:42

       That's, like, back in the cut.

   19. LHLewis Howes0:43

       She said-

   20. LNLisa Nichols0:43

       That's not in the book

   21. LHLewis Howes0:44

       ... she's like, "You gotta do the talk about your track days," 'cause I was-

   22. LNLisa Nichols0:46

       Absolutely

   23. LHLewis Howes0:46

       ... I was a decathlete and All-American.

   24. LNLisa Nichols0:48

       Yeah. Come on.

   25. LHLewis Howes0:48

       And, uh, yeah, so.

   26. LNLisa Nichols0:49

       I'm a state champion.

   27. LHLewis Howes0:50

       There you go.

   28. LNLisa Nichols0:51

       [laughs]

   29. LHLewis Howes0:51

       All right. What events?

   30. LNLisa Nichols0:52

       I, I ran the 110 and the 330 low hurdles.
3. 3:15 – 6:24

   Broke and Broken: Rock Bottom at $11.42

   1. LNLisa Nichols3:15

      don't count the number of times you've been knocked down. Get attached to the number of times you get up.

   2. LHLewis Howes3:20

      Mm. All right.

   3. LNLisa Nichols3:21

      [laughs] Like-

   4. LHLewis Howes3:21

      I, I'm gonna get these truth bombs all day, I get it. [laughs]

   5. LNLisa Nichols3:23

      Right, right. Boom, boom, boom, boom. [laughs]

   6. LHLewis Howes3:26

      I love it. Um, I'm curious now, 'cause you didn't start off, you know, with a lot of money and with a lot of abundance mindset, did you?

   7. LNLisa Nichols3:32

      Right. Um, it wasn't just not a lot of money, you know. It's one thing to be fiscally broke. It's another thing to be emotionally broken.

   8. LHLewis Howes3:40

      Mm.

   9. LNLisa Nichols3:40

      Two very different things.

   10. LHLewis Howes3:41

       Right.

   11. LNLisa Nichols3:42

       And I was broke and broken. And, um, in 1994, I had to go get on government's assistance just to feed my, my newborn baby. Um, I had to get on WIC, Women, Infant, and Children. Uh, and I still say it, and, you know, I say it often. I'm interviewed, I was interviewed 155 times in five months for my previous book, No Matter What, and it still hits me in the same place. I, I was, um, ashamed to stand in line with all the other mothers, some fathers, to get free butter, free cheese, free milk-

   12. LHLewis Howes4:20

       Mm

   13. LNLisa Nichols4:20

       ... free pasta. But at the same time, I was grateful that there was such a service to help people like me, that-

   14. LHLewis Howes4:28

       Mm

   15. LNLisa Nichols4:28

       ... I knew this wasn't where I was going to stay.

   16. LHLewis Howes4:31

       Right.

   17. LNLisa Nichols4:32

       But it was where I was in that moment. I wasn't committed to take up real estate there, but it was my current address in broke and broken. It kind of hit the... I, I, I felt like I hit the bottom. You know, sometimes you feel your back on the bottom, like, "I think that's the bottom."

   18. LHLewis Howes4:48

       [laughs]

   19. LNLisa Nichols4:48

       Right? Um, my s-

   20. LHLewis Howes4:49

       And then there's always a deeper bottom.

   21. LNLisa Nichols4:50

       Yeah, right, right, right, right. [laughs] So when I was getting, uh, uh, when I was getting, uh, food stamps, I thought I was at the bottom.

   22. LHLewis Howes4:57

       Mm-hmm.

   23. LNLisa Nichols4:58

       And then-

   24. LHLewis Howes4:59

       You went deeper. [laughs]

   25. LNLisa Nichols4:59

       Boom, boom, boom. Right. Uh, I went to the ATM. I ran out of Pampers-

   26. LHLewis Howes5:03

       Mm

   27. LNLisa Nichols5:03

       ... for my son Jelani, and I went to the ATM to get money to go buy Pampers.

   28. LHLewis Howes5:08

       Mm-hmm.

   29. LNLisa Nichols5:08

       And it said insufficient funds, and I had $11.42 in the bank.

   30. LHLewis Howes5:15

       What's the minimum? You can take out 20 bucks from an ATM is what you meant?
4. 6:24 – 12:20

   Inherited Scarcity: Culture, Gender, and Faith

   1. LNLisa Nichols6:24

      Scarcity, lack. I was born and raised in South Central LA. I grew up between the Harlem Crip 30s and the Rollin' 60s. I had three fights a week to get home from school. My highest grade in school was a C+. In 12 years of school, my highest grade was a C+.

   2. LHLewis Howes6:37

      Mm.

   3. LNLisa Nichols6:38

      And so if you ever tell this story to anybody, don't forget my plus.

   4. LHLewis Howes6:40

      [laughs] Exactly.

   5. LNLisa Nichols6:41

      Don't for- y'all don't forget my plus.

   6. LHLewis Howes6:43

      [laughs]

   7. LNLisa Nichols6:43

      It's very important to, uh, to a C stud- to a A student-

   8. LHLewis Howes6:45

      Of course. I was a, I was a C or D student-

   9. LNLisa Nichols6:47

      Right, right, right, right

   10. LHLewis Howes6:47

       ... at best, so I get it. [laughs]

   11. LNLisa Nichols6:48

       So to a A student, it doesn't matter. Like plus, plus, whatever.

   12. LHLewis Howes6:50

       I get it.

   13. LNLisa Nichols6:51

       But to a C student, the plus matters, man.

   14. LHLewis Howes6:54

       I get it.

   15. LNLisa Nichols6:54

       So, um, so I struggled. Everything in my life was about a hustle.

   16. LHLewis Howes6:58

       Mm-hmm.

   17. LNLisa Nichols6:59

       Everything. Nothing was easy except the love for my family. That was easy and effortless-

   18. LHLewis Howes7:04

       Mm

   19. LNLisa Nichols7:04

       ... and graceful and bountiful and... But everything else outside of that, it was a hustle. Get or get got. It was the environment I grew up in.

   20. LHLewis Howes7:12

       Mm-hmm.

   21. LNLisa Nichols7:12

       And I'm not saying that you have to grow up in that rough environment to have an amazing future. People always say, "Well, Lisa, I didn't have it rough. Could I have a..." Listen, I would've traded my background in for anybody.

   22. LHLewis Howes7:20

       [laughs] Right.

   23. LNLisa Nichols7:21

       Like don't think I chose that so I can have this. And so I didn't know abundance. I didn't know abundance existed. I didn't know abundance could happen to people who look like me.

   24. LHLewis Howes7:30

       Mm.

   25. LNLisa Nichols7:30

       A woman geographically from my neighborhood, I didn't know abundance can be that. I didn't see it around me. I didn't know abundance could be for someone that w- that was in my culture.

   26. LHLewis Howes7:38

       Mm-hmm.

   27. LNLisa Nichols7:39

       Everything was about survival and hustle. So it was so many things. And spiritually, I didn't know that someone who loved God, who had a spiritual foundation can also have prosperity without being perceived as greedy.

   28. LHLewis Howes7:50

       Mm-hmm.

   29. LNLisa Nichols7:50

       I mean, everything in my environment said, "Not me." Everything said, "Not me," if I listened to the sound effects.

   30. LHLewis Howes7:57

       Right.
5. 12:20 – 15:57

   The Turning Point and Defining Abundance

   1. LHLewis Howes12:20

      What was the moment you experienced-

   2. LNLisa Nichols12:22

      [laughs]

   3. LHLewis Howes12:22

      ... the, the thought, the idea-

   4. LNLisa Nichols12:23

      Right

   5. LHLewis Howes12:23

      ... the catalyst that broke that?

   6. LNLisa Nichols12:25

      I like how you say a moment. Like I got a aha. [laughs] The ceiling opened up and the lights came in and the angels ca- no. No. Maybe it was overtime. Right. It was, there was a moment when, there was a moment when suffering became too painful. There you go. So mine didn't necessarily come at a glory moment. It came- Mm-hmm ... with $11.42 and watching my baby wrapped in a towel. Yep. A towel. I, I felt like I was being unfair to him. Mm-hmm. See, because 30 days before the towel, I'm really telling my stuff, 4, 30 days before the towel, his father called me, and when I answered the phone, never forget, I said, "Hello?" He said, "Lisa, I'm in LA County Jail." Well, I don't do jail. Mm-hmm. And I don't do people in jail. [laughs] Right. And I don't do people who have a possibility of going. So, how did you get there? 'Cause I met you in corporate America, and you were a professional. How he got there is his business. I don't know. But now I'm a single mom of a son whose father- Mm ... is now in prison. Ba-bum-bum, rock bottom. [laughs] Rock bottom again. So, 30 days later, when I had my son wrapped in a towel, I was done. Yeah. I was just done. You were sick and tired of being sick and tired. I was done. Mm-hmm. So you know, the concept of bankrupt is there's nothing left. Yeah. That's the concept of bankrupt. So I like to explain it, I was bankrupt in my mess. Uh-huh. I was bankrupt in my chaos, and I was bankrupt in every sexy... 'Cause my excuses are sexy, by the way. [laughs] I've been a linguistic specialist- [laughs] ... for years. I could talk my teachers- Oh, good ... into doing things right. [laughs] I mean, that's just been my gift. My father used to say, "Lisa, please promise me you will use your powers for good." [laughs] And so I was bankrupt- Right ... in all of my excuses. So if you ask when, it was probably about three hours after I told my son, "We'll never be here again," on day two of being wrapped in a towel in 1994. Mm-hmm. And then I said, "How?" The next question was how. If I'm done with this, I'm not even sure what that looks like. Mm. I just know over there are a bunch of abundant thinkers living an abundant life, having abundant memories, with a surplus of everything they need. 'Cause abundance is to be an overflow of the things that you have. Abundance is just about overflow. It's about overflow. That means that if there were a saucer under this cup, abundance would be everything, um, this tea flows over into the saucer, and I can feed you from my saucer- Mm ... 'cause I have filled my, filled my cup up enough. I use my cup for me, and I feed you from my saucer. Mm. And abundance is saying, I have a saucer in my relationships filled with great experiences. There's a saucer in my health and wellness. I have so much bountiful health and vitality that I can show up for you. There's a saucer with my spirituality that I can pray for you. I can forgive the perceivably unforgivable and love the perceivably unlovable. And then there's a saucer for my finances. Mm-hmm. And that in every area, because abundance is a 360 experience. See, wealth is singularly focused. Wealth is about your money and your possessions. That's wealth. Okay? But abundance is 360. I have a lot of very, very wealthy friends- Who are miserable, unhappy- Who are, who are not abundant ... bad relationships. Yeah, yeah. Who are not abundant. They're wealthy. Living in scarcity. Yeah. They're wealthy. They're not abundant. Mm-hmm. And they now understand that, and they come to me and go, "Lisa, help me with my relationships with my family," or whatever. Right. And so, um, I, I, I had to learn something different. I, I, Lewis, I didn't know what I didn't know. Mm-hmm. And so I, I,

6. 15:57 – 21:26

   Unlearning Beliefs and Hunting for New Knowledge

   1. LNLisa Nichols15:57

      that, that became the moment when I said, "What do I need to know to have something different? What do they know that I don't know, and how can I get it?" And I became a hunter. So, what was the first discovery? Um, that there's a mindset- Mm ... that comes with abundance, that they think differently. They don't just do something different. There's not a hookup. First of all, what camera do I look into? Is it that one? Any one. Any one. There is no such thing as a hookup. I am still waiting on mine. And if you know where it is, my phone number is. [laughs] So there's no hookup. Yeah. There's no hookup. Like, it's not true. Like, you got a 297 million chance in one to win the lotto. Mm. And within five years, the people who win the lotto are in more debt than they were before they won the lotto. Amazing. So that ain't even a hookup, right? Yeah. And so, um, I realized that I needed to change my mindset. I needed to learn something different. And, and I needed to know it at a cellular level. All that stuff I just told you about, my color, my gender, my- Mm-hmm ... I had to unlearn. People are, we're, we're information junkies, 'cause we got all kind of access to information online. Yeah. And we're learning all this stuff, but we're not implementing anything. Right. I'm sorry, I might step on a few toes. That's what I do. [laughs] And so I realized that I had to, at a cellular level, first, before I went to get any more information, I had to be willing to divorce and evict some belief systems that I already had, that they had taken me as far as they can take me, and now they're holding me back. Mm-hmm. It's almost like you wear a size 11, you have 11 foot, and you try to fit it back in a size seven shoe. [laughs] You, you passed that a long time ago. [laughs] And, and that's gonna be a very uncomfortable day. I was in discomfort. Right. I was very uncomfortable with my thinking. And so I, I started diving into books. The first book I di- I dove into was Stephen Covey's Seven Habits- Mm ... of Highly Effective People, and it disrupted me. It disrupted everything. I didn't know. It was like, it was like a double door opened up, and then a wall opened up. And I'm like, "What do they... They know that?" Like, "Why nobody told me that?" Like, I felt like I was out, out of a club. Mm. And really, you are. I'm just gonna tell you. Abundant thinkers think a certain way. Mm-hmm. And they don't go around trying to, trying to sh- convert you. Like, people like you and I go, "Let's open it up to everyone." Yeah. But here's what I, I know about the human spirit, is that the human spirit has the power of choice, and most people don't wanna choose this kind of thinking 'cause it costs you something. Mm-hmm. It costs you. And what's the cost? The cost is you gotta get up earlier. You get up earlier than the average guy. Your day, what you do in a day is what some people do in a week. Mm-hmm. What you do in the mornings is what some people do in a 12-hour day. You gotta be willing. Right. What you're willing to do on your book tour to get on the New York Times- Mm ... some people say, "I gotta do all that?" I don't wanna do all that

   2. LHLewis Howes18:34

      It's a lot of work.

   3. LNLisa Nichols18:34

      Okay, great.

   4. LHLewis Howes18:35

      Yeah.

   5. LNLisa Nichols18:35

      Then have your life. Like, you have to s- you sign up for your life experience.

   6. LHLewis Howes18:39

      Mm-hmm.

   7. LNLisa Nichols18:39

      There's no way. Like, you are a-- When I realized that I was a culmination of all my decisions, that's like straight with no chaser.

   8. LHLewis Howes18:47

      [laughs]

   9. LNLisa Nichols18:48

      That's like getting it with no cookies and milk.

   10. LHLewis Howes18:50

       Mm.

   11. LNLisa Nichols18:51

       I was a culminate- You're a culmination of all your decisions. And then when you up-level your decisions, and that- that's even hard at times when you go, "God, why am I always single?" You're a culmination of your decisions. You're a culmination of your actions. Why can't I keep any money? You're a culmination-

   12. LHLewis Howes19:04

       Mm

   13. LNLisa Nichols19:04

       ... of your decisions, your life. So I wanted to make better decisions, 'cause my son being wrapped in a towel, me having $11.42, me being overweight, me, my, my son's father being in prison, I, I couldn't shake it. I was a culmination. My life experience was a culmination of all my decisions.

   14. LHLewis Howes19:22

       Mm-hmm.

   15. LNLisa Nichols19:22

       And it was undoubtedly a hot mess.

   16. LHLewis Howes19:25

       Mm.

   17. LNLisa Nichols19:26

       And so I went, "Well, let me go learn from somebody whose life don't seem like it's a hot mess, and then let me adopt some of their behaviors." When I began to hunt-

   18. LHLewis Howes19:33

       Mm

   19. LNLisa Nichols19:33

       ... I went to conferences. I, and, and I-- scared the bejeebies out of me, these conferences. I'd never been to conferences before. I went to entrepreneurial conferences. I was the on- I was one of four women at a, an a 800-person conference.

   20. LHLewis Howes19:45

       Wow.

   21. LNLisa Nichols19:45

       And I was the only woman of color. So it was all older white men and me, and I was like, "Okay, well, they, they're not afraid of money seems like. They're talking money and business and corporations and ROIs and, and PPMs and term agreements and no habla Español.

   22. LHLewis Howes19:59

       [laughs]

   23. LNLisa Nichols19:59

       I don't know what that mean, but I am not leaving-

   24. LHLewis Howes20:01

       Mm

   25. LNLisa Nichols20:01

       ... until I figure this out."

   26. LHLewis Howes20:02

       Right.

   27. LNLisa Nichols20:03

       And I went to the same conference. When I say do what other people won't do, so, and you'll have what other people don't have, I went to the same conference those 42 times.

   28. LHLewis Howes20:12

       Mm.

   29. LNLisa Nichols20:12

       I told you I was a C student, so [laughs] it took me, took me a minute to get it.

   30. LHLewis Howes20:15

       That's a lot of work. Conferences all year.
7. 21:26 – 24:28

   Visualization and Cognitive Dissonance

   1. LHLewis Howes21:26

      How important-- You know, I'm a big believer in visualization.

   2. LNLisa Nichols21:28

      Oh.

   3. LHLewis Howes21:29

      And, uh, obviously in The Secret that's something that was talked about. I haven't watched Secret in 10 years-

   4. LNLisa Nichols21:32

      Right

   5. LHLewis Howes21:32

      ... when it came out, but I mean, this is something I practice as an athlete, to visualize my results-

   6. LNLisa Nichols21:37

      Yes

   7. LHLewis Howes21:37

      ... before the game would happen-

   8. LNLisa Nichols21:38

      Yes

   9. LHLewis Howes21:38

      ... to see myself scoring the touchdown-

   10. LNLisa Nichols21:40

       Yes

   11. LHLewis Howes21:40

       ... in, in the track meet, and I'm sure-

   12. LNLisa Nichols21:41

       Yes, yes

   13. LHLewis Howes21:41

       ... you did a lot of similar things. How important is visualization in abundance, um, but then also how important is taking action?

   14. LNLisa Nichols21:49

       Right. So I have five visualization exercises in that book-

   15. LHLewis Howes21:53

       Mm-hmm

   16. LNLisa Nichols21:53

       ... just because it's so important. Visualization is a gift to your heart and your soul. It's a gift. Because if the, the idea is the seed, visualization is the, is the, um, is the fertilizer.

   17. LHLewis Howes22:09

       Mm-hmm.

   18. LNLisa Nichols22:09

       It's the fertilizer. Because when your thoughts are connected with an emotion, see, you would visualize yourself winning, and you would feel all the emotion that came with that.

   19. LHLewis Howes22:19

       Mm.

   20. LNLisa Nichols22:19

       And all you're doing now is you're not chasing a foreign emotion. You know the feeling.

   21. LHLewis Howes22:24

       Mm-hmm.

   22. LNLisa Nichols22:24

       And now you're just doing what's necessary to get back to that feeling in real time.

   23. LHLewis Howes22:28

       Exactly.

   24. LNLisa Nichols22:28

       And so what, what a good friend of mine, Vishen-

   25. LHLewis Howes22:31

       Mm-hmm

   26. LNLisa Nichols22:31

       ... um, who, uh, the CEO of Mindvalley, who you know-

   27. LHLewis Howes22:34

       Right

   28. LNLisa Nichols22:34

       ... um, I would-- I did a visualization with him. We were in Bali. And, um, he said to me afterwards, "I never get emotional."

   29. LHLewis Howes22:41

       [laughs]

   30. LNLisa Nichols22:42

       "I cried."
8. 24:28 – 28:55

   Finding Your Calling and Serving Over Earning

   1. LHLewis Howes24:28

      How does someone discover their unique calling? 'Cause you talk about that in the book, discovering your unique calling. What if people are like, "I don't even know what I want. I know I wanna be, uh, out of the place I'm in. I wanna be-

   2. LNLisa Nichols24:37

      Right

   3. LHLewis Howes24:37

      ... abundant, wealthy, healthy-

   4. LNLisa Nichols24:39

      Right, right

   5. LHLewis Howes24:39

      ... great relationships."

   6. LNLisa Nichols24:40

      Right.

   7. LHLewis Howes24:40

      "But I don't know what my purpose or calling is right now."

   8. LNLisa Nichols24:43

      I think that people put, uh, too big of a, a notion on purpose in that they think that it has to look like a Nelson Mandela or a Mother Teresa or Oprah or a you or a I.

   9. LHLewis Howes24:56

      Mm-hmm.

   10. LNLisa Nichols24:56

       And, and a lot of times what you're really good at is right in front of you.

   11. LHLewis Howes25:00

       Mm.

   12. LNLisa Nichols25:00

       What you're really great at is right in front of you, and to recognize that your calling and your purpose can change.

   13. LHLewis Howes25:05

       Right.

   14. LNLisa Nichols25:05

       That it can change. You have a long lifetime. It's not gonna be the same calling the whole time. And so allow yourself to evolve. Allow your purpose to evolve. What's that thing you do effortlessly that you give no credit to? 'Cause you're, you're, you're just looking past, "Oh, it can't be that 'cause it's not hard." Well, how about-

   15. LHLewis Howes25:22

       [laughs]

   16. LNLisa Nichols25:22

       ... it doesn't have to be difficult?

   17. LHLewis Howes25:23

       Exactly.

   18. LNLisa Nichols25:23

       How about the fact that you're a great listener? How can you take that and, and use that and expand that? And, and don't compare yourself to someone else. Comparison, I think Benjamin Franklin said, "Comparison is the thief of all joy." It's all-

   19. LHLewis Howes25:35

       Mm-hmm

   20. LNLisa Nichols25:35

       ... when you look left or right, you know, people are always comparing me to Oprah Winfrey or Iyanla Vanzant or, or Les Brown or Tony Robbins. I said, "Listen, I will-- if you want me to give you Oprah or Iyanla or Tony or Les, I'm always going to 1000% fail you."

   21. LHLewis Howes25:51

       Mm-hmm.

   22. LNLisa Nichols25:52

       "But if you're ever interested, I do a damn good Lisa Nichols."

   23. LHLewis Howes25:55

       [laughs]

   24. LNLisa Nichols25:56

       I do. I, I do a good Lisa Nichols.

   25. LHLewis Howes25:58

       Yeah.

   26. LNLisa Nichols25:58

       And so when you look at what are my gifts, what are my unique gifts, I knew very early on I was a gifted speaker. I wasn't certified as a gifted speaker. I haven't passed any courses as a speaker. Matter of fact, the last time I took a speech class, I got a D minus.

   27. LHLewis Howes26:12

       Mm.

   28. LNLisa Nichols26:13

       And my speech teacher told me, "Miss Nichols, I recommend you never speak in public-

   29. LHLewis Howes26:18

       Wow

   30. LNLisa Nichols26:18

       ... that you get a desk job." That was in my freshman year of college, the last speech class I took. So a lot of times your gift and your purpose, you've discounted it either because someone else discounted it, or what's more common is you don't know how to monetize it.
9. 28:55 – 36:44

   The Four E's: Enrichment and the I See You Exercise

   1. LHLewis Howes28:55

      Let's talk about the four E's.

   2. LNLisa Nichols28:56

      Mm.

   3. LHLewis Howes28:56

      What is this principle of the four E's which, that you talk about in your book?

   4. LNLisa Nichols28:59

      Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, um, so the-- I, I, I like to break up my life in quadrants, and I-

   5. LHLewis Howes29:05

      Mm-hmm

   6. LNLisa Nichols29:05

      ... help my students. I do a lot of coaching. I do personal development and professional development coaching, and no matter where you c- where you come to me, whether you come to me for personal development or whether you are, uh, wanna turn your passion into profit and this professional development and business development for entrepreneurs, we go over the four E's.

   7. LHLewis Howes29:21

      Mm-hmm.

   8. LNLisa Nichols29:21

      Because abundance is holistic.

   9. LHLewis Howes29:23

      Yeah.

   10. LNLisa Nichols29:23

       It's a holistic experience. So the first is enrichment of self, that you are only gonna go as far as you think you're worthy.

   11. LHLewis Howes29:30

       Mm.

   12. LNLisa Nichols29:30

       I, I can push, you can push. You can, you can have the greatest product, but if you don't feel worthy, you will work hard to sabotage that relationship.

   13. LHLewis Howes29:37

       Mm-hmm. Okay.

   14. LNLisa Nichols29:37

       You w- you don't know you're doing it.

   15. LHLewis Howes29:39

       Every day you will. [laughs]

   16. LNLisa Nichols29:39

       You-- right. You don't know you're doing it. You think, "These are the things I need," and you're driving that guy away.

   17. LHLewis Howes29:44

       Mm.

   18. LNLisa Nichols29:44

       You're driving that woman away because y- your self-worth says they weren't gonna stay forever anyway. Or, um, uh, self-worth around money. You have a cap that you feel like you're worthy of a million dollars. You will always get to 999,000 [laughs] and you will stop-

   19. LHLewis Howes29:58

       Right

   20. LNLisa Nichols29:58

       ... because your self-worth says it. So enrichment is number one.

   21. LHLewis Howes30:02

       What's a good exercise or process that we can follow on a daily basis, maybe something simple, to enhance our enrichment-

   22. LNLisa Nichols30:09

       Absolutely

   23. LHLewis Howes30:09

       ... and worthiness?

   24. LNLisa Nichols30:10

       Absolutely. I did this for six months every single day right after I brush my teeth, and, uh, it's the I See You exercise. And you get in the mirror. Now, it is not necessarily simple 'cause-

   25. LHLewis Howes30:22

       [laughs]

   26. LNLisa Nichols30:23

       ... uh, 'cause you're dealing with yourself.

   27. LHLewis Howes30:24

       Of course.

   28. LNLisa Nichols30:25

       And as complicated as you are [laughs] will, will be the degree of this-

   29. LHLewis Howes30:27

       Well, the mechanics of it are simple.

   30. LNLisa Nichols30:28

       Right. The mechanics are very simple.
10. 36:44 – 41:11

    Enchantment, Engagement, and Endowment

    1. LNLisa Nichols36:44

       Relationships are going to define the quality of your life.

    2. LHLewis Howes36:47

       Mm-hmm.

    3. LNLisa Nichols36:47

       When you're on your bed on your last days, you're gonna wanna know who's gonna be around you.

    4. LHLewis Howes36:51

       Mm-hmm.

    5. LNLisa Nichols36:52

       Bottom line, you're not gonna care about another podcast.

    6. LHLewis Howes36:54

       No.

    7. LNLisa Nichols36:54

       You're not gonna care about another sponsor.

    8. LHLewis Howes36:56

       The book that came out.

    9. LNLisa Nichols36:56

       I'm not gonna care about the book-

    10. LHLewis Howes36:57

        Yeah

    11. LNLisa Nichols36:57

        ... or the freaking New York Times best... It matters to us now.

    12. LHLewis Howes37:00

        Yeah.

    13. LNLisa Nichols37:00

        But the relationships in your life are going to determine the quality of your life. And so mind- Your relationships.

    14. LHLewis Howes37:06

        Mm-hmm.

    15. LNLisa Nichols37:06

        And so in the book Abundance Now, I teach you how to, how to heal broken relationships that matter to you, how to get back level set. I give you this great, um, this great tool, um, called, um, it's a, it's a, it's, um, a conversation to heal a m- a broken experience.

    16. LHLewis Howes37:24

        Mm-hmm.

    17. LNLisa Nichols37:25

        So, uh, it's called a communication charter. I use it in my company, I use it at my house.

    18. LHLewis Howes37:29

        Yeah.

    19. LNLisa Nichols37:29

        And, um, so just is about how do I keep great relationships. And then the third area is engagement, work engagement. You're gonna spend so much time at work, and we're so emotionally attached to our work, and most of the time people are attached in such a dismal way.

    20. LHLewis Howes37:43

        Mm-hmm.

    21. LNLisa Nichols37:43

        That why would you have that dismal energy around something you're gonna spend so many hours in? So I teach you how to shift your energy towards your work so that you no longer look at it as your work. Now it's no longer your J-O-B. Like, everyone in my community, all, everyone in my tribe, they no longer say they have a job.

    22. LHLewis Howes37:59

        Mm-hmm.

    23. LNLisa Nichols38:00

        They say, "I have an investor." And when you look at your job as your investor and you really rename it as your investor-

    24. LHLewis Howes38:06

        Yeah

    25. LNLisa Nichols38:06

        ... and it's investing in your breathtaking future, it has the capacity to buy anything you want for your future, if you mind your money right.

    26. LHLewis Howes38:13

        Right.

    27. LNLisa Nichols38:14

        Right? It can buy your freedom. And all of a sudden you start treating your investor better and you're more excited about going. Matter of fact, you're grateful.

    28. LHLewis Howes38:19

        Yeah. You have fun.

    29. LNLisa Nichols38:20

        You're grateful for your investor.

    30. LHLewis Howes38:21

        Doesn't feel like work.
11. 41:11 – 49:56

    Three Types of Relationships and Letting Go of Converting People

    1. LHLewis Howes41:11

       I wanna talk, talk a little bit more about relationships, because I feel like for my success, my growth has all been about, um, relationships and building quality relationships. In the process, I've lost, I would say, a lot of friends-

    2. LNLisa Nichols41:24

       Yes. Yes

    3. LHLewis Howes41:24

       ... from college to after college. You know, it's like a lot of people don't understand it. They don't get it.

    4. LNLisa Nichols41:30

       Right.

    5. LHLewis Howes41:30

       And when you try to connect with them and educate-

    6. LNLisa Nichols41:33

       Right

    7. LHLewis Howes41:33

       ... or, or just lift them up and say-

    8. LNLisa Nichols41:34

       Right

    9. LHLewis Howes41:34

       ... "Hey, this is possible for you too"-

    10. LNLisa Nichols41:35

        Rescue 911

    11. LHLewis Howes41:36

        ... it's almost, it's almost scary for them, and-

    12. LNLisa Nichols41:38

        Yes

    13. LHLewis Howes41:38

        ... a lot of judgment happens, a lot of negative talk behind your back, jealousy-

    14. LNLisa Nichols41:42

        Yes. Yes

    15. LHLewis Howes41:42

        ... things like that. Have you lost a lot of relationships over the years from family to friends? Um, and how do you handle a situation when someone that you're very close with no longer, um, wants to grow, wants to learn, wants to be in this abundance mindset?

    16. LNLisa Nichols41:58

        Mm-hmm.

    17. LHLewis Howes41:58

        What do you do in that situation? Do you just cut them out? Do you add new people to your life? How does that work?

    18. LNLisa Nichols42:04

        So there's-

    19. LHLewis Howes42:04

        'Cause I know you have great relationships and you're constantly-

    20. LNLisa Nichols42:06

        Do

    21. LHLewis Howes42:06

        ... connecting with people.

    22. LNLisa Nichols42:07

        I do, and I nurture them.

    23. LHLewis Howes42:08

        Yeah.

    24. LNLisa Nichols42:09

        And there's, there's probably just a few, few years between us.

    25. LHLewis Howes42:14

        [laughs]

    26. LNLisa Nichols42:15

        Just a few.

    27. LHLewis Howes42:16

        [laughs]

    28. LNLisa Nichols42:16

        Um, but they've taught me something.

    29. LHLewis Howes42:18

        Yeah.

    30. LNLisa Nichols42:19

        And, um, I'm happy you asked that question, 'cause I've been looking at that lately.
12. 49:56 – 56:46

    Purposeful Relationships and Her Son's Lesson in Compassion

    1. LHLewis Howes49:56

       What do you think is the most purposeful relationship you've been in?

    2. LNLisa Nichols49:59

       [laughs]

    3. LHLewis Howes50:03

       The one that's-

    4. LNLisa Nichols50:04

       Are you gonna turn around and ask me the most life-giving one, too?

    5. LHLewis Howes50:07

       [laughs]

    6. LNLisa Nichols50:07

       I gotta check, I gotta check this question out-

    7. LHLewis Howes50:09

       Sure, both of them

    8. LNLisa Nichols50:09

       ... 'cause right, right, right. Yeah.

    9. LHLewis Howes50:10

       Both of them.

    10. LNLisa Nichols50:11

        Uh, um, purposeful relationship that I've been in. Um, I'm gonna tell you three. Uh, um, so one is, uh, with a girlfriend of mine who taught me to trust other people. Her name is Denise.

    11. LHLewis Howes50:29

        Did you not trust people before?

    12. LNLisa Nichols50:31

        Um, I don't know if I distrusted. I didn't, just didn't try to trust.

    13. LHLewis Howes50:34

        Mm-hmm.

    14. LNLisa Nichols50:34

        I, I, I was, I was queen of I can do it.

    15. LHLewis Howes50:37

        Yeah.

    16. LNLisa Nichols50:37

        I can do it. Don't worry about me. I'm good. Don't worry about me. Which we don't think that's lack of trust. We just think that's I'm a superhero.

    17. LHLewis Howes50:42

        Mm-hmm.

    18. LNLisa Nichols50:43

        Do you see this S on my chest? I got this. I realized if I don't... I think it was a part of no tru- but it was unconscious. I, I would never say I don't trust people.

    19. LHLewis Howes50:50

        Right.

    20. LNLisa Nichols50:50

        I just said I got it.

    21. LHLewis Howes50:51

        Yeah, yeah.

    22. LNLisa Nichols50:51

        I got... Don't worry about me.

    23. LHLewis Howes50:52

        Yeah.

    24. LNLisa Nichols50:52

        You're good. Don't worry about me.

    25. LHLewis Howes50:53

        [laughs]

    26. LNLisa Nichols50:53

        I'm good. I'm good. I'm good.

    27. LHLewis Howes50:54

        Sure, sure.

    28. LNLisa Nichols50:55

        So she taught me how to trust. Um, and my ex-fiance, who abused me, uh, taught me how to fight for my life without fighting with words. I fought without fighting. I fought... I, I grew up like this.

    29. LHLewis Howes51:11

        Mm-hmm.

    30. LNLisa Nichols51:11

        I grew up like this, and I had to learn how to fight with, uh, uh... strategically. He made me realize how much I wanted to live and how much I had to live for-
13. 56:46 – 1:09:54

    Releasing 78 Pounds: The Emotional Jacket

    1. LHLewis Howes56:46

       Now, I'm curious-

    2. LNLisa Nichols56:46

       And I'm grateful

    3. LHLewis Howes56:46

       ... I want you to stay in this moment because, uh, you know, I'm curious how... For, it sounds like to me for a long time, I know this is our first time connecting-

    4. LNLisa Nichols56:55

       Yeah

    5. LHLewis Howes56:56

       ... but it sounds like to me for a long time-

    6. LNLisa Nichols56:57

       Not the last

    7. LHLewis Howes56:57

       ... yes, I hope not. Sounds like to me for a long time you were living in abundance in a lot of areas of your life, but-

    8. LNLisa Nichols57:03

       Yeah

    9. LHLewis Howes57:03

       ... a- a- and except the health category.

    10. LNLisa Nichols57:05

        Absolutely. Absolutely.

    11. LHLewis Howes57:06

        And-

    12. LNLisa Nichols57:07

        100%. 1,000%.

    13. LHLewis Howes57:08

        And w- how were you able to navigate that process-

    14. LNLisa Nichols57:12

        Right

    15. LHLewis Howes57:12

        ... the conversation with-

    16. LNLisa Nichols57:13

        Right, right, right

    17. LHLewis Howes57:13

        ... I don't see myself the way-

    18. LNLisa Nichols57:15

        Right

    19. LHLewis Howes57:15

        ... this man sees me-

    20. LNLisa Nichols57:15

        Right, right, right, right

    21. LHLewis Howes57:16

        ... and other people see me, and-

    22. LNLisa Nichols57:18

        Right

    23. LHLewis Howes57:18

        ... my body isn't-

    24. LNLisa Nichols57:18

        Great question

    25. LHLewis Howes57:19

        ... showing who I'm being.

    26. LNLisa Nichols57:20

        Right. It was incongruent. [clears throat] I'll say it. It's a grown folk conversation.

    27. LHLewis Howes57:25

        Yeah, it's fine.

    28. LNLisa Nichols57:25

        It was incongruent with who I knew myself to be.

    29. LHLewis Howes57:28

        Mm-hmm.

    30. LNLisa Nichols57:29

        It was what I call my kryptonite. It was-
14. 1:09:54 – 1:13:13

    From Welfare to Wall Street and Joinlisafree

    1. LNLisa Nichols1:09:54

       Yeah. So, um, I'm in a season where people ask me what, how, well, how did I go from public assistance to going public?

    2. LHLewis Howes1:10:01

       Mm.

    3. LNLisa Nichols1:10:01

       My company two years ago went public.

    4. LHLewis Howes1:10:03

       Yeah.

    5. LNLisa Nichols1:10:03

       And so the big conversation-

    6. LHLewis Howes1:10:05

       And you're the second, what is it, second African American woman to go have a public company. Is that right?

    7. LNLisa Nichols1:10:09

       Yeah, yeah.

    8. LHLewis Howes1:10:10

       Congratulations.

    9. LNLisa Nichols1:10:10

       And the only person in the self-development industry today to be the founder of a publicly held company. I'm grateful. Thank you very much.

    10. LHLewis Howes1:10:16

        Mm.

    11. LNLisa Nichols1:10:16

        And so the big question is how do you go from welfare to Wall Street?

    12. LHLewis Howes1:10:20

        Mm-hmm.

    13. LNLisa Nichols1:10:20

        How do you go from public assistance to going public, which is a big leap. And, uh, there's two big things. One, I, I changed my mindset.

    14. LHLewis Howes1:10:28

        Mm-hmm.

    15. LNLisa Nichols1:10:28

        I picked up a book, which is why I love this book, 'cause I wrote it modeling kind of like the seven habits.

    16. LHLewis Howes1:10:33

        Sure, sure.

    17. LNLisa Nichols1:10:33

        Like, how did I, what did I give up? What did I get? Okay, I'm gonna... Then the second thing was I went and I joined a tribe of people that would make me stand on my tippy-toes.

    18. LHLewis Howes1:10:40

        Mm.

    19. LNLisa Nichols1:10:40

        And so I'm, uh, I'm doing something kind of... well, not kind of crazy. My CFO says it's very crazy.

    20. LHLewis Howes1:10:46

        [laughs]

    21. LNLisa Nichols1:10:46

        I've invested over $200,000 to put on two free conferences where you just come.

    22. LHLewis Howes1:10:51

        Wow.

    23. LNLisa Nichols1:10:52

        Like, noth- there's n- your book is your ticket. Like, this is your ticket-

    24. LHLewis Howes1:10:55

        There you go

    25. LNLisa Nichols1:10:55

        ... to get in.

    26. LHLewis Howes1:10:56

        Okay.

    27. LNLisa Nichols1:10:56

        And so the way you find out about me online, I would say go to joinlisafree.com.

    28. LHLewis Howes1:11:02

        Okay.

    29. LNLisa Nichols1:11:03

        Joinlisafree.com. And there it'll give you access to my website, access to, you know, my programs, how you can be coached if you want to. But, m- I think first and foremost, it gives you access to come and be in my presence at no cost.

    30. LHLewis Howes1:11:18

        Mm.
15. 1:13:13 – 1:21:18

    Gratitude, Rituals, Three Truths, and Greatness

    1. LHLewis Howes1:13:13

       okay, final three questions. What are you most grateful for in your life recently?

    2. LNLisa Nichols1:13:18

       Oh, oh. [laughs] When you say most, you make me have to pick one.

    3. LHLewis Howes1:13:22

       Mm-hmm.

    4. LNLisa Nichols1:13:23

       Um, I am most grateful for my newfound health

    5. LHLewis Howes1:13:30

       Amen. I love it

    6. LNLisa Nichols1:13:31

       I, I'm most grateful-

    7. LHLewis Howes1:13:32

       Congratulations

    8. LNLisa Nichols1:13:33

       ... I'm most grateful that my body can now keep up with my life purpose.

    9. LHLewis Howes1:13:37

       Mm. That's great. That's beautiful.

    10. LNLisa Nichols1:13:40

        And I'm, I, I, I just have to say this. I would be remiss if I didn't. I'm grateful for my 86-year-old grandmother who was sitting in the audience last night-

    11. LHLewis Howes1:13:51

        Mm

    12. LNLisa Nichols1:13:52

        ... cheering me on, who accompanied me to Jamaica to see me speak, who's coming out tonight [laughs] to see me speak again.

    13. LHLewis Howes1:14:01

        Mm.

    14. LNLisa Nichols1:14:03

        That she's in her right body, her right mind, a, a able body, a right mind, and she's in my life and she's able to witness what she helped create.

    15. LHLewis Howes1:14:11

        Mm. I love it. Thanks. Um, I'm actually gonna add one more question. What's something you do every single morning, a ritual that you do no matter where you are, what's happening, what's something you must do, non-negotiable?

    16. LNLisa Nichols1:14:24

        Um, I find 10 things to be grateful for before my feet hit the ground.

    17. LHLewis Howes1:14:28

        Mm.

    18. LNLisa Nichols1:14:30

        10 things, and they can't cost money. They can't cost money.

    19. LHLewis Howes1:14:34

        Perfect. Do you write them down or you just think about them-

    20. LNLisa Nichols1:14:36

        I just think about them

    21. LHLewis Howes1:14:36

        ... acknowledge them? Yeah.

    22. LNLisa Nichols1:14:37

        I think about them. I say them out loud. Um, I, I speak to 'em.

    23. LHLewis Howes1:14:41

        Mm.

    24. LNLisa Nichols1:14:41

        Uh, some days I, a lot of days I do 25, but I won't let myself move until I've done 10.

    25. LHLewis Howes1:14:46

        Mm.

    26. LNLisa Nichols1:14:46

        Every day, no matter where I am. Sometimes I do it on the plane 'cause I get up really, really early, and so I, if I'm at a-

    27. LHLewis Howes1:14:52

        Mm

    28. LNLisa Nichols1:14:52

        ... crack of dawn flight, I g- I, I... and especially if I'm feeling strained and stressed, I go over my gratitude list 'cause gratitude will reduce stress all day long.

    29. LHLewis Howes1:15:01

        Of course. I believe in it. Every morning I do three things. Maybe I'm gonna have to step it up to 10, but every night I always speak it out loud and ask someone what their, the three things-

    30. LNLisa Nichols1:15:09

        Mm-hmm

Episode duration: 1:21:21