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The Mel Robbins Podcast

8 Truths About College That Nobody Tells You

These 8 pieces of advice will change your college experience. In this episode, Mel is sharing the most impactful and insightful advice for all college students.

Mel Robbinshost

Aug 29, 202444mWatch on YouTube ↗

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CHAPTERS

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Chapter summaries

Move-in day emotions & why this episode exists
Mel records right after dropping her son Oakley at college, describing the raw anxiety and nostalgia that move-in day can trigger. She sets up the episode as the advice she wishes she’d gotten—and what she and her adult daughters just told Oakley.
- •Post-drop-off emotions: pride, grief, anxiety, reflection
- •College transition as a pivotal life moment
- •Advice compiled from Mel plus her 24- and 25-year-old daughters
- •Promise: practical truths for students (and helpful for parents too)
“Don’t let studying get in the way of your education” (the real purpose of college)
Mel recounts her father’s move-in day line and explains what it actually means: college is a crash course in life skills, not just academics. She frames the episode’s “eight truths” as lessons you only really learn by living through change.
- •College teaches life navigation: change, independence, self-advocacy
- •Education is broader than grades and textbooks
- •Skills learned through discomfort and real experiences
- •You can’t fully ‘think’ your way into these lessons—you live them
Truth #1: Boredom is normal—use it as a cue to explore
Mel normalizes the strange boredom and unstructured free time that often hits early in college. Her prescription is simple: when you’re bored, leave the dorm and explore campus resources, events, and hidden opportunities.
- •Boredom is a sign you’re adjusting, not failing
- •Unstructured time can trap you in your dorm/phone
- •Use boredom to explore dining halls, buildings, posters, clubs, facilities
- •Story: discovering student workshops (jewelry studio) by wandering
Truth #2: The first month feels weird because your body is in sensory overload
Mel explains that the transition isn’t just mental—it’s physiological and neurological. New smells, sleep, food, bathrooms, and surroundings can make you misread discomfort as “I’m at the wrong school,” when it’s often just acclimation.
- •Sensory shock: new environment, routines, sleep, and social context
- •Everyone is affected, even if they pretend they’re fine
- •Discomfort can masquerade as doubt (“I don’t belong here”)
- •Time and structure (classes, clubs, jobs) help regulation
Hack: Build a morning routine—move your body before your phone hijacks the day
Mel offers a concrete tool to speed adjustment: create consistency at the start of the day. She warns that defaulting to scrolling in bed entrenches low mood and indecision, while movement and getting outside aligns your nervous system faster.
- •A morning routine creates stability amid massive change
- •Avoid waking up and immediately scrolling/rotting in bed
- •Do one thing: get out the door and move your body
- •Movement/outdoors accelerates acclimation and improves mood
Truth #3: Change comes fast—so go slow with drinking and hookups
Mel warns that many students try to numb the overwhelm by partying hard immediately, leading to danger and regret. She gives direct guidance: slow down alcohol use and be cautious about early hookups, especially with upperclassmen pressure.
- •Overdrinking early is common and can lead to medical emergencies
- •You have four years—no need to sprint in the first weeks
- •Hookup “feeding frenzy” is driven by hormones + freedom + alcohol
- •Going fast can create lasting awkwardness, drama, and reputation fallout
Truth #4: Friendship forms slowly—stay flexible and don’t cling
Mel tackles the fear that everyone else already has a group. She explains quick ‘orientation cliques’ often form from anxiety and proximity, then shift over time; the healthiest approach is flexibility, inclusion, and letting friendships evolve.
- •It’s normal to feel like an outsider while others ‘click up’
- •Early cliques are often coping mechanisms, not permanent bonds
- •Friend groups commonly change year to year
- •Inclusion beats exclusion; gripping friendships creates toxicity
Truth #5: Your best college life is at your college—get off social media
Mel calls out the mental-health spiral of watching other schools’ highlight reels while judging your own experience. She urges students to stop clinging to high school relationships online and invest that energy locally to create real memories.
- •Social comparison makes you think your school ‘sucks’
- •Clinging to high school friends/partners blocks new connections
- •Highlight reels distort reality and steal time from real fun
- •Replace scrolling with showing up to campus life in person
Truth #6: Do things alone to beat loneliness and build confidence
Mel reframes solo action as a core life skill college is meant to teach. She encourages students to eat alone, join clubs alone, and introduce themselves without using roommates/friends as a security blanket.
- •You don’t need a buddy to participate—go anyway
- •Solo experiences build confidence and independence fast
- •Loneliness shouldn’t be the gatekeeper of your choices
- •Learning to show up alone pays off beyond college (career, money, life)
Truth #7: You’re not stuck—advocate and ask for help instead of quitting
Mel emphasizes personal responsibility: nobody will craft your college experience for you. Rather than transferring impulsively, she urges students to use campus systems—RA, advisor, dean, professors—to change what isn’t working.
- •College requires self-advocacy; parents aren’t there to manage things
- •You can change roommates, classes, majors—use the system
- •Don’t confuse discomfort with ‘I must transfer’
- •Stop complaining privately; ask the right people for help
Truth #8: Every year resets—expect change and repeat the adjustment cycle
Mel explains that each year brings new environments, people, routines, and stressors, so the ‘weird’ feeling can return even after freshman year. The deeper lesson is learning to ride life’s constant transitions without panicking.
- •Sophomore/junior/senior years can feel unfamiliar in new ways
- •Friends come and go; routines shift with housing, internships, study abroad
- •Recurring overwhelm is normal—adaptation is the skill
- •Your job: keep exploring, moving, going solo, and staying flexible
Closing: The supportive text to Oakley & a push to get out the door
Mel reads the rest of her message to Oakley, reinforcing that he’s in the right place and will find his stride soon. She ends with encouragement—then insists listeners stop consuming content and go practice the advice in real life.
- •Reassurance: grace, time, and rhythm will come
- •“Home is a text away” while still building independence
- •Expect ups/downs; soon you’ll wake up and realize you can do hard things
- •Final call-to-action: get out of bed, off the phone, and engage campus life

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