Andrew Schulz - Surviving The Cancellation Apocalypse (4K)

Andrew Schulz 0:00 You can't say, "We're the modern day philosophers, we're the ones putting the truth out there in the world. We're the ones changing the world. We're the ones holding the mirror up to the powerful people," and then on the same level go, "Why are they canceling us for what we say?" You said you're important. You said you're changing the world. Well, if I was someone in power, I'd sure as wanna silence those mother ( censored ) s that are saying the real ( censored ) . If you're that important. Say we're not important at all, and we can say whatever the ( censored ) we want. I have value saying what the ( censored ) I want. So treat me like a clown. I don't give a ( censored ) .

Chris Williamson 0:27 Andrew Schulz, welcome to the show.

Andrew Schulz 0:29 Thank you.

Chris Williamson 0:30 What's happening, man?

Andrew Schulz 0:30 Chillin', man.

Chris Williamson 0:31 Very good. I just missed you in the UK when you were over there. What'd you make of it?

Andrew Schulz 0:35 Yeah. Uh, uh, I liked it. I actually had a good... Yeah, I had a good time over there. It was cool. We got to, you know, do some cool interviews and, uh, I actually got to hang out in London. I haven't really hung out in London before. I didn't, like, do the whole pub thing.

Chris Williamson 0:46 Mm-hmm.

Andrew Schulz 0:46 I like the pub thing.

Chris Williamson 0:48 Do you not think you have an equivalent over here?

Andrew Schulz 0:50 It's different. It's different. Like, pub for pub's sake is not... We need another excuse. Uh, I think that's why we have, like, sports almost every night of the week, so it's like we can go to the bar to watch a sport-

Chris Williamson 1:03 Not just for a hang.

Andrew Schulz 1:04 Yeah. Like, just going to drink feels wrong here. You know what I mean?

Chris Williamson 1:09 (laughs) Yeah.

Narrator 1:09 Dunno, yeah.

Andrew Schulz 1:09 Like, I'm going to the bar to drink, like, just that? Yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:13 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 1:13 To meet anybody? Maybe.

Chris Williamson 1:15 England.

Andrew Schulz 1:16 But mostly drink.

Chris Williamson 1:17 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 1:18 Doesn't that feel...

Chris Williamson 1:19 I dunno man. It's part and parcel of the, the British culture, right? This is one of the problems they have with shutting down of pubs, that they're saying it's disconnecting people from each other.

Andrew Schulz 1:26 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:26 And people are becoming more isolated.

Andrew Schulz 1:28 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:28 So, you spent a good bit of time

Chris Williamson 1:30 with True Geordie, Brian, while you were over there.

Andrew Schulz 1:31 Love Brian. Free Brian.

Chris Williamson 1:33 Well, dude, I want to talk about that-

Andrew Schulz 1:35 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:35 ... because I think-

Andrew Schulz 1:35 He's converted to Islam, did you know that?

Chris Williamson 1:37 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 1:38 Did you guys... This is breaking news. Brian is actually converting to Islam.

Chris Williamson 1:41 Pete Davidson is now Jewish.

Andrew Schulz 1:43 Yep.

Chris Williamson 1:43 And Brian, True Geordie, has converted to Islam.

Andrew Schulz 1:45 Brian is converting to Islam, yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:47 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 1:47 He had to give up the foreskin. Did you know that?

Chris Williamson 1:50 No.

Andrew Schulz 1:51 He's getting circumcised-

Chris Williamson 1:51 That's a heavy price to pay. I imagine he's got a massive foreskin.

Andrew Schulz 1:53 I don't know how heavy, but you know what I mean? Like-

Chris Williamson 1:56 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 1:56 Brian, do you think Brian's got a big, big unit?

Chris Williamson 1:57 Big foreskin. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's no-

Andrew Schulz 1:59 It's all foreskin. (laughs)

Chris Williamson 1:59 Yeah, it's just 90% foreskin. It's like a sock. It's like a sock with a tennis ball in it.

Andrew Schulz 2:05 (laughs) Shout out to Brian, man.

Chris Williamson 2:06 Yeah, so I, I thought it was very interesting, 'cause you guys do these sort of intros to the beginning of your pods where it's like a, a, a ran... like a bit-

Andrew Schulz 2:14 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 2:14 ... for maybe a minute or two minutes. And you guys have said some ( censored ) during those that I, I can't believe gets put on the internet. What was interesting about watching Brian is, he said something that could have been a bit taken straight out of one of your intros.

Andrew Schulz 2:27 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 2:27 Right? And he got smashed for it. Gymshark dropped him, Pokestars dropped him-

Andrew Schulz 2:32 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 2:32 ... got banned for a while on Twitch.

Andrew Schulz 2:33 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 2:35 Is there, like, a special button that people need to be able to press that lights up and says, "I'm doing a comedy bit." Because he's not a comedian-

Andrew Schulz 2:43 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 2:43 ... but he dips in and out of comedy.

Andrew Schulz 2:45 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 2:45 And because of that, it's like he gets judged by the same criteria that a normal creator does-

Andrew Schulz 2:51 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 2:51 ... but tries to do the stuff that comedians do.

Andrew Schulz 2:54 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 2:54 Do you know what I mean? It's like people that cross both thresholds, they're kind of... they're in a bit of a, a tough bind because they're gonna be looked at and it's like, "Well that wasn't a joke. That was actually his true fucking whatever coming out."

Andrew Schulz 3:04 Yeah. It almost benefits every podcaster to do standup once so that you can say you're a comedian.

Chris Williamson 3:11 (laughs) So you've got the comedian card?

Andrew Schulz 3:13 You know what I mean? Like, yeah just do it one time and then say you're a comedian, and then just say more or less whatever you want. Because, like, comics, we're like, eh, how do I say it? It's not like... It's like if you see somebody dressed in, like, a provocative manner, right? And they're your school teacher, you're like, "What the fuck?" But if you saw, like, a stripper dressed in that way, you'd be like, "Oh, she's really conservative when she's not stripping," right? So I think that's what it's like being a comedian, where it's like you expect me to say even crazier shit, so if I made the joke that he made, nobody would give a fuck.

Chris Williamson 3:46 Mm.

Andrew Schulz 3:46 But I think with a lot... with Brian, I think you expect him to be very serious. Like, he's serious about a lot of shit, even though he's fucking hilarious. Like, he was hilarious on our pod. I don't know if you saw our episode-

Chris Williamson 3:55 Yeah, I did. Great.

Andrew Schulz 3:55 ... but that motherfucker is funny. So yeah, it's a shame, man. It's a shame. Uh, yeah, I'm wondering how do you create that kind of protection? I always, you know... I... My thing is I'm gonna ride for the jokes. My loyalty is to the jokes. I know he was making a joke, there was clear misdirect. He was playing off of stereotypes that we all know exist. And, um, yeah, I thought it was funny. I don't know if he has, like, a hatred in his heart for, for Muslims. I think he has a hatred in his heart for Andrew Tate. Do you know what I'm saying? But (laughs) , like, if Andrew Tate converted to Judaism, then he would have a joke-

Chris Williamson 4:26 Then Kanye.

Andrew Schulz 4:27 ... that was about Jews, right?

Chris Williamson 4:28 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 4:28 Yeah, exactly. Like he'd s-... he'd open it with, like, My Dark Twisted Fantasy or whatever. Like (laughs) , he would have something busting balls. So it's not about the religion, it's just about punishing this guy that he doesn't like.

Chris Williamson 4:39 Mm.

Andrew Schulz 4:40 Yeah. Yeah, that's what I would say. So yeah, I'd defend him. But I also understand these brands, they're looking out for themselves, right? They don't really care about him, they care about his audience. And then once he becomes too radioactive for them to make money, why are they gonna keep giving him money? Now, he's got to remember that next time he does business with a brand, 'cause if they come back later and he continues to have the biggest show and blows the fuck up, and let's say he becomes, you know, the, the Rogan. I guess maybe he's already the Rogan of the UK, but let's say he has the biggest fucking platform, then Gymshark could come back and be like, "Hey, we'd really like sponsorship." And he'd go, "Fuck yourself. You left me when I was in a dark time, so now I'm not gonna continue to promote your brand." So that's what I would do with him. I would just keep on getting bigger and then remind every one of those companies they ain't shit.

Chris Williamson 5:21 Well, that was the interesting insight I learned from you, that a lot of people believe there is this grand conspiracy, everybody is unified together in this way to try and take people down. What you said, it's, it's individuals, it's individual actions. This guy's got a new house that he basically-

Andrew Schulz 5:37 Yes.

Chris Williamson 5:37 ... can't afford the mortgage on, and a kid that's going to a new private school-

Andrew Schulz 5:39 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 5:39 ... and blah, blah, blah, and the wife expects a new car every so often.

Andrew Schulz 5:42 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 5:43 And he goes, "I'm gonna lose my fucking job."

Andrew Schulz 5:45 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 5:45 The incentives are aligned for individuals to act in a way which makes it look like a coordinated conspiracy from the outside.

Andrew Schulz 5:52 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 5:52 But that's not to say that there aren't fucking, like, overlords out there that are trying to coordinate certain things.

Andrew Schulz 5:56 Tons.

Chris Williamson 5:56 I'm sure there are.

Andrew Schulz 5:57 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 5:58 But I do think that the simplest solution is individual people terrified about losing their job-

Andrew Schulz 6:03 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 6:04 ... looking out for themselves.

Andrew Schulz 6:04 100%. Even...... even those situations where we think they're overlords, a lot of times it's the people under them doing what they think the overlords would like. Like, I remember I used to go ... There was, like, a few, like, Fox News shows that were, like, funny. Like, they were actually funny shows, right? And, um, they would have comedians on. You can kind of say whatever. And I remember going there, and I remember, like, times, like, like, my material would, like, skew a little bit more conservative. And I remember reflecting on it and going like, "Wait a minute, am I just trying to say the thing that would win in this environment?"

Chris Williamson 6:39 Mm.

Andrew Schulz 6:39 And I had to check myself. And in that moment, I was like, "Oh, wow, if I was an employee of this company, of course I'm gonna do the things that I think my boss likes. I'm gonna behave in a way that, you know-"

Chris Williamson 6:50 Your big influence just skewed a tiny little bit.

Andrew Schulz 6:52 We're humans, we like to be rewarded, bro.

Chris Williamson 6:54 Is there such a thing as a joke that goes too far?

Andrew Schulz 6:57 Yeah, to everybody. Everybody's got a limit.

Chris Williamson 6:59 But is there such a thing, like, objectively, as a joke that's too much? Could you write a joke that would be so much that it shouldn't be allowed on the internet, or it shouldn't be allowed to be published?

Andrew Schulz 7:09 Is it funny?

Chris Williamson 7:11 Yes.

Andrew Schulz 7:11 No. Then there's not. If it's funny, if everybody's laughing, then, then no. Like, you're laughing. Like, (laughs) I mean, that's the thing I learned in my career is basically, like, in order for me to get away with the most fucked up jokes that I wanna make, I gotta do it right to the people I'm talking about. So if I'm doing a joke ... I don't wanna do any Black jokes with no Black people in the room. I want there to be Black people in the room and I wanna be doing the joke to them, 'cause if they're laughing, you can't be offended on their behalf. And it's usually white people offended on behalf of non-white people.

Chris Williamson 7:41 Mm-hmm.

Andrew Schulz 7:41 Right? But if you see the Black people laughing, now you gotta shut up with your offense. Right? So w- I kind of realized that, and I'm very fortunate I got this, you know, very diverse audience so I can talk about all these different things to those people, and it's not just a bunch of white people in a room making fun of minorities. Which feels weird, even if the jokes are funny.

Chris Williamson 7:59 Yes.

Andrew Schulz 7:59 Like, there could be a hilarious joke about Asians, but if there's no Asians there, it's like, "All right. What's going on, bro?"

Chris Williamson 8:05 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 8:05 Like (laughs) , doesn't it feel weird?

Chris Williamson 8:07 Talking about your friend behind his back while he's not there.

Andrew Schulz 8:09 I don't even like talking about Black shit on the podcast without Alex. So Alex, one of my co-hosts on Flagrant, like, when he's there, it's way more comfortable talking about Black shit. Right? Because there's a Black dude that can talk about it.

Chris Williamson 8:19 He's the window into the Black world. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Andrew Schulz 8:22 Yeah. He could be like, "Oh, okay, this is ... Now I can see why people are upset." Or if he's laughing, you know, that it's silly, it's still kind of fun.

Chris Williamson 8:28 Yup.

Andrew Schulz 8:28 It just makes it better.

Chris Williamson 8:29 Yeah, I know what you mean.

Andrew Schulz 8:30 You know what I mean?

Chris Williamson 8:30 And then-

Andrew Schulz 8:30 Or even gay stuff. Like, without Mark, I don't wanna talk about gay shit.

Chris Williamson 8:34 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 8:34 Do you know what I mean? Like, he doesn't know he's gay, but he is. You know? (laughs) So that's why Mark is there, so we have some gay representation. You know what I mean?

Chris Williamson 8:44 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 8:44 Just sitting in the middle are two guys, the way he likes it.

Chris Williamson 8:47 Is it the g- (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 8:48 You know what I mean? Listen, you don't get monkeypox one at a time, guys.

Chris Williamson 8:53 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 8:53 You know? (laughs) That's a group activity. Shout out to the gays.

Chris Williamson 8:57 Right. With ... Was th-

Andrew Schulz 8:59 Was that a thing in England, monkeypox?

Chris Williamson 9:02 Um, did it come over here? No, no, it probably didn't, no.

Andrew Schulz 9:06 No England?

Chris Williamson 9:07 No. They're just way too-

Andrew Schulz 9:08 Yo, yo, you gays in England are soft. Step it up.

Chris Williamson 9:12 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 9:13 Step it up. New York gays are the hardest gays on the planet, you know? (laughs) Like, we have ... New York gays, they're gay.

Chris Williamson 9:21 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 9:21 They're gay. They're gay the way I would be gay.

Chris Williamson 9:24 How?

Andrew Schulz 9:25 Dick all the time, bro.

Chris Williamson 9:27 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 9:27 Like, you know what I'm saying? (laughs) Like, like, like, like everybody was shocked that, that this monkeypox thing was, like, a problem. I don't know if you heard about it.

Chris Williamson 9:34 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Andrew Schulz 9:35 Okay, okay, 'cause the ... What's the guy's name? Fauci? Fauci basically came up b- and he was like, you know, the way it's getting transferred or whatever. What did he say exactly? It's like ...

Chris Williamson 9:45 Fuck, I don't know how he said it was getting trans- It was getting transferred through butt sex.

Andrew Schulz 9:48 Yeah, but a specific type. It was gay orgies.

Chris Williamson 9:52 Ah, yeah, okay.

Andrew Schulz 9:53 Exactly.

Chris Williamson 9:54 Okay.

Andrew Schulz 9:55 Yeah. So, you know?

Chris Williamson 9:56 Stop your orgies. Or do more-

Andrew Schulz 9:59 I mean, I-

Chris Williamson 9:59 ... and then get immunity. Natural immunity.

Andrew Schulz 10:00 Do whatever the fuck you want. I don't care. What I'm trying to say is, like, the places in the world that have gay populations that weren't getting monkey sex, I don't think that you're taking advantage of being gay.

Chris Williamson 10:10 (laughs) That's the litmus test. The-

Andrew Schulz 10:11 You're just having one-on-one sex? Be straight.

Chris Williamson 10:13 ... the canary in your coal mine is have you got monkeypox or not.

Andrew Schulz 10:16 Canary in a coal mine sounds like some gay shit, bro. I don't know.

Chris Williamson 10:18 That's what I just said.

Andrew Schulz 10:18 Okay, good.

Chris Williamson 10:18 That's what I mean.

Andrew Schulz 10:19 That was a good pun. (laughs)

Chris Williamson 10:20 When it comes to, when it comes to the brine thing, to just, like-

Andrew Schulz 10:24 (laughs) Yeah, yeah.

Chris Williamson 10:24 ... think about that.

Andrew Schulz 10:25 Yeah, yeah.

Chris Williamson 10:26 Do you have stricter rules as your platform grows? Or is it just the fact that you're under more scrutiny?

Andrew Schulz 10:33 I think you just gotta be funnier. The, the, the rule would be be funnier, and when you're taking those shots, make sure that they, they hit.

Chris Williamson 10:41 But what about outside of that? What about if it's just someone generally, not necessarily a comedian, not trying to make a funny joke online?

Andrew Schulz 10:47 Mm-hmm.

Chris Williamson 10:48 As your platform grows and as more people watch your stuff-

Andrew Schulz 10:50 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 10:51 ... do you need to be more careful about the things that you're saying-

Andrew Schulz 10:53 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 10:53 ... in a way?

Andrew Schulz 10:53 Especially d- depending on which ... Like, for example, I don't tweet anymore. Like, I get all these ... Like, my drafts are crazy.

Andrew Schulz 10:59 Like, one day I'm gonna release the t-

Chris Williamson 11:00 The tweet and delete?

Andrew Schulz 11:01 Oh, man. One day ... I don't even delete it. I don't even let it out there. I just type it in so I know the thought is there, and then that shit goes right to the drafts. If somebody hacks my Twitter, it's over for your boy.

Chris Williamson 11:09 One, one day someone at Twitter's gonna press the wrong button-

Andrew Schulz 11:11 Ooh.

Chris Williamson 11:11 ... and un- unleash all of your drafts.

Andrew Schulz 11:13 I gotta be on, on Elon's good side. I gotta stop talking shit about Elon, bro, 'cause, 'cause he could release all my drafts.

Chris Williamson 11:19 What do you think, Elon, hero or villain? The internet's pretty split halfway at the moment.

Andrew Schulz 11:22 Just the idea that, like, he could figure out spaceships and not Twitter. Like, Twitter isn't, like, a hard thing. Like, have you ever met someone in tech? Like, they're not the best, like, socializing human beings. Do you know what I mean? Like, i- i- the fact that they could figure out socializing. Like, have you seen them talk to each other? Like, Zuckerberg has to, like, be reminded to blink, right?

Chris Williamson 11:42 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 11:42 Like, his eyes dry out. He's, "Oh, I like MMA, I like surfing." Blink. Okay, there you go. Right? It's like, so E- (laughs) So it's like there's, there's ... These aren't the people that are good at socializing, and they figured out apps around socializing. Elon can figure out how to just write something and post it. It's not that difficult. So if ... I have no question he's gonna figure it out. It's gonna be better. They'll have a billion users. They'll find out a way to monetize it. It'll be easy.

Chris Williamson 12:07 But is he doing it for the right reasons, in your opinion?

Andrew Schulz 12:11 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 12:12 'Cause that's the question, right? I-

Andrew Schulz 12:13 I don't know, but in my opinion, yeah. I-

Chris Williamson 12:15 I think ... I, I, I would agree. Like it seems-

Andrew Schulz 12:17 Well, what's the right reasons? I have, I might have a different right reason than you.

Chris Williamson 12:20 For me it would be to open up-

Andrew Schulz 12:21 'Cause he cares about free speech?

Chris Williamson 12:22 It would be to open up communication online, yes. That's my opinion.

Andrew Schulz 12:27 I think that's part of it. But I think that there's other parts.

Chris Williamson 12:31 What other parts?

Andrew Schulz 12:32 I think if you're a billionaire you need an, some sort of, like, news apparatus to protect yourself. Like, there's a reason why Microsoft, Bill Gates got MSNBC. The MS is Microsoft NBC, right? Amazon got The Washington Post. It's like, once you get enough money where people should kill you because you have that much money, you need a newspaper or something to be like, "Yo, don't kill that guy."

Chris Williamson 12:52 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 12:52 You know what I'm saying? Like, that's what all the articles are. It's like, you know, "Amazon gives $100 million to this." And it's just like, "Yo, don't kill me."

Chris Williamson 12:58 Is there not a difference between something that's editorial and something that's just a platform, though? Like, Bezos can influence what goes out on The Washington Post a lot more easily than Elon can tell people what to tweet.

Andrew Schulz 13:08 Yeah, but Elon can also tweet whatever the fuck he wants. And he can also-

Chris Williamson 13:11 Never get removed.

Andrew Schulz 13:13 Not, not only can it never get removed, but he can also remove shit that's said about him that's fake. Right? He could be like, "That's fake news."

Chris Williamson 13:20 Mm.

Andrew Schulz 13:20 He can't do that from The Washington Post. But there's a lot-

Chris Williamson 13:23 But they did that-

Andrew Schulz 13:24 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 13:24 They did that fact check thing, didn't they, about, uh, pension-

Andrew Schulz 13:28 I'm not saying he would do this, but he can. There's power.

Chris Williamson 13:30 Yes.

Andrew Schulz 13:31 You know, you ... And all news is on Twitter right now. That's what Twitter is, it's really a news feed, right? So The Washington Post, nobody goes to The Washington Post to read an article. They see the article pop up on Twitter and then they go to it. So if they're posting fake news about Elon, he could be like, "Oh, that's fake news. Adios. See you later."

Chris Williamson 13:45 They did that thing about, was it pensioners', uh, benefit checks, and it got fact checked by saying that the reason that pensioners in the US are now getting so much more money is because of inflation, and everything is adjusted for inflation. So the increase was massive, but the increase was based on the fact that inflation is massive.

Andrew Schulz 14:03 Hilarious.

Chris Williamson 14:04 And it was a, whatever it's called, a little window below saying-

Andrew Schulz 14:06 So they fact checked it?

Chris Williamson 14:07 Yeah, and it put it on the tweet. And it was like, "Uh, this is why this ..." And it was within, like, two days of Elon buying Twitter. It was fucking hilarious.

Andrew Schulz 14:13 I love that.

Chris Williamson 14:14 Did you see the new shit that just came out today that the FBI, the ex-counsel to the FBI who was working for Twitter got hold of the Twitter files before they went to Matt Taibbi and, uh, the other lady that, that was part of the Twitter release. And he, it seems, allegedly, has scrubbed the links between the FBI and the Hunter Biden laptop thing, and he's now been fired by Elon.

Andrew Schulz 14:39 You never stop working for the FBI.

Chris Williamson 14:41 You think? Once you're in, you're in?

Andrew Schulz 14:44 Yeah. (laughs) I mean, you're more effective being a retired FBI guy. I don't trust retired CIA, I don't trust retired FBI. You think they're gonna let you retire with all that information? You know what I mean? It's like ... No, that's use- ... That's a lifetime job, man. If they give you information that could shut the whole thing down, you're in for life, and you better know you're in for life. It's not like you do your 20 years and you write your tell-all book. We don't got that many tell-all books, right? We got the Confessions of an Economic Hit Man.

Chris Williamson 15:12 Mm.

Andrew Schulz 15:12 He just said the shit that we all know. He didn't really say anything. And also, he's a scumbag for that. Don't, like, do it, profit off of doing it, and then write a book about how bad it is and then profit off of that.

Chris Williamson 15:23 That's the Levi King arc. That's what's coming next-

Andrew Schulz 15:25 Okay.

Chris Williamson 15:25 ... is the Levi King arc.

Andrew Schulz 15:26 Which is what?

Chris Williamson 15:27 That you go through the villain and then, "I am now the hero that is coming clean for what it is-"

Andrew Schulz 15:34 About being honest-

Chris Williamson 15:34 Yes.

Andrew Schulz 15:35 ... about who I am.

Chris Williamson 15:35 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 15:35 Et cetera.

Chris Williamson 15:35 Yeah. And then, one of my friends is adamant that his end goal is to become a WWE star. Like, that's, that's this-

Andrew Schulz 15:41 I think Alex asked him and he was like ... We were like, "Do you do wrestling?" He's like, "Oh, I'm 45." And then he goes, "No, no, like WWE." So he actually thought-

Chris Williamson 15:47 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 15:48 ... that he might, like, like, be a wrestler-

Chris Williamson 15:50 Yes.

Andrew Schulz 15:50 ... like, like do some MMA shit.

Chris Williamson 15:51 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 15:52 He was like, "No, but, uh, I don't know if he's gonna do the WWE." Maybe. But yeah, go do it. And if that was the whole goal, then that would be very deceptive.

Chris Williamson 15:59 Yes.

Andrew Schulz 16:00 I don't think that is. I think that, I think that he, he genuinely ... Yeah, I think he genuinely found something that was very helpful to, like, him and his family-

Chris Williamson 16:08 Mm.

Andrew Schulz 16:08 ... and he shared it and monetized it. And any time you monetize anything, I'm gonna be skeptical. Like, any time there's money associated ... I told him, I was like, "Bro, if you were an accountant and you did this shit, nobody would question it. No one would care, 'cause you're not making any money off it." The second you make money off something, there's always a little bit of a, "Mm."

Chris Williamson 16:24 The incentives aren't gonna be quite as pure.

Andrew Schulz 16:26 Right?

Chris Williamson 16:26 Yeah. Yeah, man. I mean, this is why Huberman is such a fucking interesting example. He's like, "What do you suggest that I take for my Fadogia agrestis," or whatever fucking supplement it is. And he just goes, "Well, I'm not involved with any of these companies-

Andrew Schulz 16:39 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 16:39 "... but this is what I think." And it gives you so much faith that what he's saying-

Andrew Schulz 16:42 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 16:42 ... is genuinely what he believes.

Andrew Schulz 16:43 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 16:44 Because he has no incentive to say otherwise.

Andrew Schulz 16:46 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 16:46 Like, all that that guy sells, I think, is maybe, like, ad-free access and T-shirts.

Andrew Schulz 16:52 I think he's gonna do some supplements, or he already has-

Chris Williamson 16:53 Eventually.

Andrew Schulz 16:54 ... some supplements.

Chris Williamson 16:54 Eventually, he should do.

Andrew Schulz 16:55 We should look that up. He might even have some now.

Chris Williamson 16:58 Well-

Andrew Schulz 16:58 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 16:58 Uh-

Andrew Schulz 16:59 But he should because we trust him, right?

Chris Williamson 17:01 Correct. Yeah. But that's what latent leverage is, right? That's what-

Andrew Schulz 17:04 What is that?

Chris Williamson 17:04 So, um, imagine that you continue to give and give and give and give to-

Andrew Schulz 17:09 Oh, then it's time to ...

Chris Williamson 17:10 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 17:10 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 17:10 To your audience. And then when they do, they don't feel aggrieved about buying shit from you.

Andrew Schulz 17:14 100%.

Chris Williamson 17:15 You know?

Andrew Schulz 17:15 I think that probably worked for me with the special. Like, I had given away-

Chris Williamson 17:17 100%.

Andrew Schulz 17:17 ... so many fucking hours of standup comedy that when I was finally like, "Yo, I really believe in this thing. This thing cost me a lot of money. Can you guys support me?" I think there was a lot of people just DM me. They were like, "Yo, we'd be more than happy to. Thank you." Like ...

Chris Williamson 17:30 Mm-hmm.

Andrew Schulz 17:30 And that was really cool. Because when you start giving away shit for free so much you expect it to free- be free in your head, even though it's not free for you to work out. You know, like, I put 15 years into this. You know? So I was like ... But yeah, that was a cool response. Latent leverage.

Chris Williamson 17:44 Latent leverage.

Andrew Schulz 17:45 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 17:45 Yeah, you just accumulate ... Well, I mean, it's Gary Vee's, like, jab, jab, jab, right hook-

Andrew Schulz 17:49 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 17:49 ... philosophy, if you were thinking-

Andrew Schulz 17:50 That's also, like, dating. It's like dinner, dinner, dinner ...

Chris Williamson 17:53 There it is.

Andrew Schulz 17:53 Dick s-

Chris Williamson 17:54 Speaking of dating-

Andrew Schulz 17:55 Monkeypox. (laughs)

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Chris Williamson 18:56 The manosphere, give me your thoughts on the manosphere.

Andrew Schulz 18:58 Yeah, what about the ma- manosphere's always existed, it just got less funny. That's my issue with it. Like, be funny. Be funny about whatever it is. Like, like my, my favorite comedian, the greatest comedian of all time, uh, hands down is Patrice O'Neal. Like Patrice O'Neal is early manosphere. Like I don't know if you watch any of his stuff. Like I'm early manosphere. Like my stuff, I've got jokes that are like perfectly aligned with manosphere shit, but they're jokes, it's funny. What was so great about Tate was he was funny. Like Mark was telling us this one thing, I didn't even see this one, he's like, "I'll never let a girl drive my car." He goes, uh, they're like, "Why?" He goes, "Have you ever, uh, thrown something at your girl and she caught it?" (laughs)

Chris Williamson 19:37 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 19:37 Like, like (laughs) like that's just a hilarious ... That joke could go on stage. Like you could take ... He's got lines you could g- take and go on stage and that's why it was so effective. It's like it, it, it tapped into almost like Borscht Belt comedy. Remember? Have you heard of like the Borscht Belt?

Chris Williamson 19:51 No, what's that?

Andrew Schulz 19:52 Like old back in the day comed- like the, "Take my wife please," these one-liners, right?

Chris Williamson 19:56 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Andrew Schulz 19:56 These one-liners were all incredibly offensive, but they tap into feelings that we have. And our feelings are not the things we execute. You get cut off, you wanna be like, "I wanna fucking kill that person," but you don't really kill them. It's a momentary feeling. So you have frustration with your wife, the, "Take my wife please," everybody in the audience, every husband who's dealt with their wife bitching about something, you know, in, they're the, "Oh, I, I relate to that moment. I relate to that feeling." 'Cause comedy's about feeling, it's not about truth. It's not about what should be true, it's about a feeling that is real that you've had. So I think what happens with these jokes is they tap into moments of what it is like to be a guy in this day and age, and then not funny people got into it and ruined it, like everything, and then started taking every single line seriously. And then when you start take every single line seriously, you just seem like you're ... hate women, you're angry at women, you're bitter, and that's not ... I don't think anybody really at the end of the day wants to resonate with that.

Chris Williamson 20:50 The fundamental way that it's positioned is that men and women are enemies or adversaries at the very least.

Andrew Schulz 20:54 Yeah, like they're trying to extract something from you.

Chris Williamson 20:56 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 20:56 It's kinda dangerous to think about like that.

Chris Williamson 20:59 I don't know. It, it doesn't seem like a particularly healthy way to create a foundation to build stuff up from that. And the problem is that I also understand, right? Like I was a guy in my 20s who didn't understand the world and himself and fucking everything.

Andrew Schulz 21:14 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 21:15 So you go to the internet. It was just fortunate for me that I landed on like Jordan Peterson and Sam Harris and whatever-

Andrew Schulz 21:21 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 21:21 ... as opposed to some other channel.

Andrew Schulz 21:22 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 21:22 Because you're looking for answers and this person comes across. Here's another dynamic that I always notice. Certainty with the way that people speak.

Andrew Schulz 21:29 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 21:30 Maybe this is just like in-built fucking unconfidence in knowing things.

Andrew Schulz 21:34 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 21:34 But for me, I've always got like caveats and a little bit of just, "I'm not so sure, but I feel like this is the right way."

Andrew Schulz 21:41 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 21:42 When people come out of somewhere and say, "This is the way that things are, here's a meme or a cool word or like a, a, a brand that makes it seem like a fucking legitimate academic topic."

Andrew Schulz 21:50 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Chris Williamson 21:50 "This is a thing and this is the way that it is."

Andrew Schulz 21:52 Yeah. Yeah.

Chris Williamson 21:53 It seduces people. It's one of the reasons that so many political commentators online, like Ben Shapiro is a perfect example of this.

Andrew Schulz 21:59 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 21:59 You know, whether you agree with the guy or not, he's fucking certain about all of it.

Andrew Schulz 22:02 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 22:03 And you go, "Well, wow, like that sounds compelling." And if-

Andrew Schulz 22:05 He gives you the weapons for your feelings. That's what I look at Ben as, right? It's like you're conservative, you don't know why, and then he's gonna give you the best arguments as to why.

Chris Williamson 22:13 Mm-hmm.

Andrew Schulz 22:13 Right?

Chris Williamson 22:13 Mm-hmm.

Andrew Schulz 22:13 You think abortion should be banned. Ben's gonna tell you why it should be banned and he will do it amazingly, succinct, perfect data. He just gives you the weapons for when you get into an argument at a bar.

Chris Williamson 22:24 That's very interesting.

Andrew Schulz 22:25 And I think there's a lot of people who tend to do that. But for me, they're not the most interesting. The funny people are interesting to me regardless of what they feel, and I separate that. Like my loyalty is to funny. So like a guy like Dr. Umar Johnson, which might have like many beliefs that I disagree with, is also the funniest communicator on the internet. So no matter what he says, I'm watching it, it is gonna be hilarious. (laughs) I'm just thinking of things I can't even say out loud because they're so crazy.

Chris Williamson 22:51 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 22:51 But when he does them, (laughs) they're fucking hilarious. So that's the power of comedy. It's like you really wanna communicate some shit, whether you believe it or not, comedy is the vessel. And when these people don't have any comedy and they're being like really serious and trying to execute these points and, "We gotta fucking save the world." It's like, "Shut the fuck up," right?

Chris Williamson 23:10 So I'm not sure that you always need comedy. For instance, Huberman is a good example.

Andrew Schulz 23:13 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 23:14 Doesn't use comedy an awful lot, communicates points.

Andrew Schulz 23:16 Yeah. That's true.

Chris Williamson 23:16 They make a great, they make a great impact. But I do think that you need to have a level of humility, um, like collaboration as well as opposed to this very adversarial sort of zero sum type scenario. Another one of the in- influences here as well. I went to Miami for the first time ever, um, two and a half, three weeks ago.

Andrew Schulz 23:35 Yep.

Chris Williamson 23:36 And, um, a lot of what I was seeing online in men's advice made a lot more sense after I'd been to Miami.

Andrew Schulz 23:43 Mm-hmm.

Chris Williamson 23:43 Miami unlocked the back of my brain-

Andrew Schulz 23:46 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 23:46 ... in terms of going, "Oh." This-

Andrew Schulz 23:49 Like what? What were you seeing?

Chris Williamson 23:50 So for instance, uh, your wealth is your primary, uh, source of value to the world.

Andrew Schulz 23:56 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 23:56 Who you are, the person that you're with, the table that you're on, the size of the bottle, the girls that are on your arm.

Andrew Schulz 24:00 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 24:01 What it is that the girls, how they were dressed. Like girls out in party dresses, maxi party dresses at 12 midday going for coffee in heels.

Andrew Schulz 24:08 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 24:08 Like, "Where the fuck are you going?"

Andrew Schulz 24:10 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 24:10 "What is this?" And that to me made a lot of sense because it seems like a good chunk of Miami culture, very transactional, very transient-

Andrew Schulz 24:19 Mm-hmm.

Chris Williamson 24:20 ... very resource based, has informed a lot of men's advice on the internet. And because of that, they're reverse engineering, "Miami is how all women are."

Andrew Schulz 24:29 Right. Right.

Chris Williamson 24:30 No, it's fucking not. I've met half a million women in my life stood in the front door of nightclubs.

Andrew Schulz 24:34 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 24:35 No, it's fucking not.

Andrew Schulz 24:36 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Chris Williamson 24:36 Most women on average are-... caring and kind and want a fucking guy that they can get into a relationship with that cares about them.

Andrew Schulz 24:44 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 24:44 Some of them fuck up and some of them are outright mean and nasty-

Andrew Schulz 24:47 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 24:47 ... and all the rest of it, but so are guys.

Andrew Schulz 24:49 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 24:49 Like I just ... My personal experience, which is fucking vast, does not suggest that girls are like the ruthless gold diggers that everybody says. However-

Andrew Schulz 24:57 I agree.

Chris Williamson 24:58 ... think about you're a guy on the internet.

Andrew Schulz 24:59 Same.

Chris Williamson 25:00 You're a guy in the internet-

Andrew Schulz 25:01 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 25:01 ... who doesn't have much experience with women. So what you do is you start consuming content from people who seem like they do. Or maybe they actually do.

Andrew Schulz 25:07 And also consuming content that feeds your fears.

Chris Williamson 25:09 Precisely. But what are the sort of stories that are sufficiently newsworthy to break through onto the internet? They're the most egregious transgressions of this particular-

Andrew Schulz 25:17 (laughs)

Chris Williamson 25:17 It's the girl that got into a relationship with some Canadian guy and took all of his money and now he lives on the street, and-

Andrew Schulz 25:23 Yeah. Yeah.

Chris Williamson 25:23 ... he can't ever see his kids and his dog hates him and whatever.

Andrew Schulz 25:26 While he was sleeping, went out, fucked a guy in a gas station, came back.

Chris Williamson 25:28 Yeah. Came back. Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 25:29 Like that's a real story-

Chris Williamson 25:30 Made him lick it.

Andrew Schulz 25:30 ... that a girl told. Yeah.

Chris Williamson 25:31 Like yeah, all of that.

Andrew Schulz 25:32 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 25:33 Those are the stories that break through. So if you don't have real world experience that can disprove that-

Andrew Schulz 25:37 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 25:38 ... quite rightly, you're vehemently going to think these bitches are out here trying to-

Andrew Schulz 25:42 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 25:42 ... fucking get us. I need to be-

Andrew Schulz 25:44 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 25:44 ... horribly uncertain whenever I'm around a woman.

Andrew Schulz 25:47 Yeah. Yeah.

Chris Williamson 25:47 Like ...

Andrew Schulz 25:48 I don't blame the guys for thinking it, to be honest with you. I think that like there's a lot of frustration when you're not in control of your sexual destiny. And there's two ways to handle that frustration. There's, there's ... One is go inward, the other is go outward, right? "I'm frustrated." It's like, "Well, what can I do to alleviate that frustration?" Can I like get better at chat? Can I learn what these girls are interested in and like how to make them feel comfortable, right? Or do I justify that frustration by going outward, which is, "All women are gold diggers. They don't like me because I'm fucking short or they don't like me because I'm skinny or they don't like me because I'm poor," or yada yada yada. So yeah, I think a lot of times my issue with the manosphere is that it's presented as if the frustration is, is, is, is handled inward but, "Make yourself a high value man," whatever, like that, which you do not need to be to get laid. I think the, the guys that got laid the most when I was younger were not high value. They're just good at chat.

Chris Williamson 26:38 Is that not value?

Andrew Schulz 26:40 It is value, but not in the gold digging sense. Like if we're, if we're looking at all women as gold diggers and there are these guys that are broke but they can talk them up, now they must not be gold diggers, right? Now these girls on some level just want to be made to feel comfortable, want to be listened to, want to be entertained, want to laugh, right? But it's much easier, I think, to go, "All they care about is money," when you're not that good at talking. When you're not that charming. When you're not that interesting and when you're not that interested. Like I think the best advice I ever got about women was just, uh, just get them to the point where you can listen.

Chris Williamson 27:20 What's that mean?

Andrew Schulz 27:21 Once someone feels comfortable talking to you, especially a woman, like that's a level of comfort and confidence that is gonna separate you from every other person in that bar. Like once they're sharing their feelings or talking about their opinions, et cetera, it's like that's ... You're, you're in. That's it. It's yours to lose at that point. So it's like I think a lot of times guys go in, it's like, "I have to demonstrate value. I have to show you how cool I am. Oh, look at my car. Oh, I'm gonna drop my keys on the table. There's a fucking Lamborghini thing, I hope she sees that." No. Simple as that. "Oh, work sucked, man." "Yeah. What do you do?" "Oh, yeah, you do ... Okay, yeah. Is that difficult?" "Oh, it is kind of difficult." Yeah, yeah, yeah. "Oh, yeah, it does kind of seem kind of annoying to deal with all those." "Yeah, it is kind of annoying. It is kind of ..." Just talking.

Chris Williamson 28:04 Away to the races.

Chris Williamson 28:05 Well, you're a guy who's completed that now, you know, as a rehabilitated ex-party boy who's now-

Andrew Schulz 28:09 Bro, being married is the best.

Chris Williamson 28:11 Why?

Andrew Schulz 28:13 No, it's horrible. I'm gonna be honest with you. No, I'm just kidding. (laughs)

Chris Williamson 28:16 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 28:17 No. No. No, no, it's great. It is the best. But the thing is that we don't share it's the best because that's not fun. I was talking about this with the guys on Flagrant but it's like you don't share good parts of your fucking relationships with your boys. There's nothing fun about that. You don't cli- call my boys up today and be like, "Oh man, I had a, I had a, a great chat at brunch with my wife and we really understood each other and felt safe and loved and vulnerable." Like my friends don't want to hear that fucking shit, right? They want to hear the annoying thing that my wife did to me that made me look like a fucking idiot, then we all laugh at me. Or we laugh at my wife, whatever it is. That's just way more entertaining, so there's things we share. But just to not be involved, I think, in the rat race is great. At my age, I'm 39, that's another thing. I had a great time partying, I'm glad I got it all out of my system, I don't have the FOMO that a lot of guys do. A lot of guys get hitched young and then they have to deal with their whole life, what would it be like to-

Chris Williamson 29:04 Correct.

Andrew Schulz 29:05 ... have a threesome or something like that? What would it be like to go to Miami and see if you could get laid?

Chris Williamson 29:08 Got to take them boxers off, man.

Andrew Schulz 29:09 Exactly. And I'm glad I did that. There's, at this point, there's nothing that I'm like, "I wish that I did that before I got married." So I just get to focus on developing this relationship.

Chris Williamson 29:21 One of my boys was big into pick up art history about 10 years ago.

Andrew Schulz 29:24 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 29:24 And I remember him speaking to me and he was saying, was like, "Dude, you're really fucking, like, committed to this pick up shit. Like you really, really are." Like where's it coming from?

Andrew Schulz 29:30 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 29:31 He says, "Yeah, my future wife better be thankful for this." I'm like, "You're gonna have to explain why your future wife should be thankful that you're running-

Andrew Schulz 29:39 Yeah. Yeah.

Chris Williamson 29:39 ... through half of this city-

Andrew Schulz 29:40 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Chris Williamson 29:40 ... at the age of 23."

Andrew Schulz 29:41 Got it out of the system.

Chris Williamson 29:42 And he said, "I don't want to walk down the street with my wife and my two kids and my dog and look at a Brazilian chick and think, 'I wonder what it's like to fuck a Brazilian chick.'"

Andrew Schulz 29:49 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 29:50 "I want to have closed every different loop, every different desire-"

Andrew Schulz 29:53 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 29:53 "... all the different quirks, even the monkeypox. I want to have got it all."

Andrew Schulz 29:56 (laughs) Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Chris Williamson 29:57 And that was what he wanted. And I do think that there's an element-

Andrew Schulz 30:01 Did he do it? Did he live up to it?

Chris Williamson 30:02 I have no idea. Maybe monkeypoxed-

Andrew Schulz 30:04 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 30:04 ... or, or not. Jordan, if you're listening, tell me if you're monkeypoxed.

Andrew Schulz 30:06 (laughs) Yeah.

Chris Williamson 30:06 But fucking if ... He, he definitely put the time in, man.

Andrew Schulz 30:10 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 30:10 I'm not sure how his future wife will feel about it, but-

Andrew Schulz 30:12 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 30:13 There is a part of that. Got to-

Andrew Schulz 30:14 Close the loops.

Chris Williamson 30:14 ... close off all the loops.

Andrew Schulz 30:15 100%.

Chris Williamson 30:16 Yes. Yes.

Andrew Schulz 30:16 Yeah, I think that that's, I think that's healthy as long as you're not justifying it to yourself like that. You know, I think my one issue with the pick up artist stuff, because my dad literally sent me that book. I remember being in college-

Chris Williamson 30:26 The Game?

Andrew Schulz 30:26 ... when it came out.

Chris Williamson 30:27 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 30:27 The Game. And he sent me the book, he goes, "Hey, there was ... This was written in the New York Times." And I don't know what that says about like how my dad thought I was with women, but he was like, "You should read this." Uh, (laughs) you might need-

Chris Williamson 30:37 Fucking hopeless.

Andrew Schulz 30:38 (laughs) You might need to put-

Chris Williamson 30:40 It's the only way I'm gonna get some grandchildren is if you read this fucking book, you useless sod.

Andrew Schulz 30:43 Yeah. (laughs) Here I am 17 years later. No. Uh, but, but yeah, he said, man ... And, and I thought it was fascinating, I thought it was like really cool that guys even tried to like scientifically break down what it was that created that kind of chemistry. My one issue with it always was like-... using the same lines I thought was corny and-

Chris Williamson 31:02 The fight outside between two midgets.

Andrew Schulz 31:04 Ex- exactly, yeah. Like, or whatever the, the fucking ... There was a bunch of them and I was just like, "Ugh." Like how embarrassing would that be if you used a line that somebody else at the bar also used on the girl? You're like, "Ugh." Just, just awful, right? The ... And then the other thing I didn't like, I didn't like dropping a girl's confidence so that she would like me, 'cause it assumes-

Chris Williamson 31:21 The negging, yeah.

Andrew Schulz 31:22 Yeah. No, I like teasing. I think teasing is good. I don't think it's good to do so you can drop their confidence so that you'll, you will be above them. Like, my feeling is like if you hang out with me long enough, I think I'm the shit. So if you hang out with me long enough, doesn't matter where you think I am initially, I'm coming up. So I don't have to hurt your feelings in order to get there.

Chris Williamson 31:45 My confidence doesn't need to stand on the shoulders of yours, yeah.

Andrew Schulz 31:47 Exactly. I want you at your most confident.

Chris Williamson 31:49 Yup.

Andrew Schulz 31:50 I want you at your m- 'Cause if you're not, eventually you're gonna be confident. E- two things. Either I have to keep you with a lack of confidence in order for you to like me, or that confidence is gonna go back to where it normally should. It's gonna reach homeostasis for you, and then you're gonna be like, "Oh, I don't like this motherfucker."

Chris Williamson 32:07 What the fuck am I with this guy for?

Andrew Schulz 32:09 Exactly.

Chris Williamson 32:09 Well, that's fundamentally one of the problems with people who get into relationships where their mate value isn't matched. So I've spent all this year learning about this evolutionary psychology stuff, right?

Andrew Schulz 32:16 Mm-hmm.

Chris Williamson 32:16 So there's terms for what you're talking about.

Andrew Schulz 32:17 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 32:18 So benefit affording-

Andrew Schulz 32:19 That's what I studied in, in Santa Barbara.

Chris Williamson 32:20 (laughs) Benefit affording, you both help and you grow.

Andrew Schulz 32:23 Mm-hmm.

Chris Williamson 32:24 Cost inflicting, you bring the other person down. So one of the ways that you can ensure that your mate won't leave you is to make them feel worse about themselves.

Andrew Schulz 32:32 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 32:33 If you've got a disparity in the mate value, one person seems to be pulling away than the other, maybe they're getting more confident or better looking, or they've got more attention or social status or whatever it is, one starts to pull away, you can either raise yourself up to match-

Andrew Schulz 32:44 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 32:44 ... to that, benefit affording.

Andrew Schulz 32:45 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 32:45 Or you can drag them back down-

Andrew Schulz 32:47 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 32:47 ... so that they're closer to you. And a lot of the pickup artist stuff was like that. And another thing, another problem was that people, or the girls that you were using this on weren't falling for you.

Andrew Schulz 32:56 Yeah. It's-

Chris Williamson 32:56 They were falling for the persona.

Andrew Schulz 32:58 Yeah. Yeah.

Chris Williamson 32:59 And I think a lot of guys that did pick up, look at them now, Neil Strauss, Tucker Max, both good examples. Both of them are like these fucking, like, awakened-

Andrew Schulz 33:08 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 33:08 ... like psychedelic warriors tweeting about like enacting your fucking truest self forward and shit.

Andrew Schulz 33:12 Yeah. Yeah. Neil pulled a Confessions of a Hitman. I think he put out a book about the importance of relationships.

Chris Williamson 33:17 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 33:18 Didn- (laughs)

Chris Williamson 33:19 I think so.

Andrew Schulz 33:19 You know what I mean? (laughs)

Chris Williamson 33:20 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 33:20 Like that's kind of crazy. (laughs)

Chris Williamson 33:21 But it's because I think that you realize after a while of the sort of super transactional stuff-

Andrew Schulz 33:26 Yeah, it's empty.

Chris Williamson 33:26 Yeah. You come back on the other side and now Tucker's got this ranch in Austin and like-

Andrew Schulz 33:30 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 33:30 ... four kids and 30 sheep and all this other shit.

Andrew Schulz 33:33 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 33:34 Like, that's his thing.

Andrew Schulz 33:35 Yeah. And maybe it took them, that to get there. Like sometimes you need to, to go through that part of your life to realize you don't need it.

Chris Williamson 33:41 It's vapid and empty.

Andrew Schulz 33:42 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 33:42 Yeah. You gotta close those loops.

Andrew Schulz 33:43 And it's fun.

Chris Williamson 33:44 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 33:45 It is fun. Dating is fun. Meeting a new person-

Chris Williamson 33:46 Well, the heartbreak's not fun.

Andrew Schulz 33:48 ... is fun. The heartbreak isn't fun, of course. But like meeting a new person, like going through those butterflies, like is it gonna go down? Is it not? Like these things are exciting for sure. Um, but I don't think they're close, e- not even close to as fruitful as like developing an actual relationship with somebody. And that is ... When I'm, when I say that like, I mean like a real relationship, like you are building something together.

Chris Williamson 34:13 Not just someone to watch Netflix with.

Andrew Schulz 34:15 Exact- Like, like if you have a prenup, you're, you don't have a relationship.

Chris Williamson 34:20 You have a prenup?

Andrew Schulz 34:20 No. You have a girlfriend. I'm being de-

Chris Williamson 34:24 If you have a, if you have a prenup-

Andrew Schulz 34:25 You have a girlf- ... You're not building something. You have an escape hatch.

Chris Williamson 34:30 Mm.

Andrew Schulz 34:31 You know what I'm saying? You have a girlfriend that you created a loop that you could get out of to call her your wife for her, but it's your girlfriend because you could break up whenever you want and everything's okay. A real relationship, the way that like marriage was designed is we are in this shit and we gotta fight through this and we gotta work on this and develop this fucking love. And I think you do that without the, uh, what is it called? The parachute. Now, I've been married a year. I could come back in five years like, "I was a fucking idiot, Chris. What the hell was I talking about?" You know? (laughs) Why would I do that? You know what I mean? I'm broke. Who knows? But for me, I like that more. I think it's cooler. Yeah, I think that that's more exciting.

Chris Williamson 35:11 Talking about heartbreak, not often that Andrew Tate and Jordan Peterson agree.

Andrew Schulz 35:14 Hmm.

Chris Williamson 35:15 But both of them I've seen have got the same take where they think that heartbreak is worse for guys than it is for girls. And Tate had this really fucking interesting video-

Andrew Schulz 35:23 Mm-hmm.

Chris Williamson 35:23 ... where he explained that because of the in-built possessiveness that men have, the thought of s- their ex-partner now being with a new partner is so painful-

Andrew Schulz 35:33 Mm-hmm.

Chris Williamson 35:34 ... that to them it's going to be more painful than it would be for a woman who might be emotionally, uh, distressed by it. And the other part of it was that women, uh, a heartbroken woman is someone that deserves sympathy and respect. A heartbroken guy is like, "Fucking come on man, man up." Now, I'm not sure how much I agree with both of those, but it's a fucking interesting take.

Andrew Schulz 35:56 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 35:56 It's a very interesting take to think about the possessiveness that guys have over even their exes, even exes that they don't want anymore.

Andrew Schulz 36:04 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 36:04 And I don't know whether you've ever had this where you've had an ex-girlfriend that you've let go by the bye and then there's still something about them. Like you see they've moved on and you, you've moved on. You already moved on, and yet there's still a little like twinge. You're like, "Fuck."

Andrew Schulz 36:17 I had an ex that I broke up with, I broke up with, and then we were still like friends and then she had told me she slept with someone else and I was like disgusted. I was like, "What?" And I knew I was wrong to be disgusted. I was like, "Why the fuck?" Like shouldn't there be more time, all these kind of things, 100%, but for me heartbreak was never about them being with someone else. Yeah. I, the, the, the heartbreak was always just like the sadness of not having that person that you are loving and is loving you. I, I never would jump to, "Ugh, she's gonna be with someone else now." So that's, to me, that's new information.

Chris Williamson 36:49 Mm.

Andrew Schulz 36:49 I'm not even thinking about the next person 'cause I'm thinking about this moment right now where ... Yeah. I, I don't know. I think that that's weird. That's like, that means the only reason you loved your wife is 'cause she's not fucking other guys.... that's a weird reason to love that person.

Chris Williamson 37:02 I'm not sure that would be the reason that you love them, but it might be the reason why heartbreak hurts so much on the other side of it. I don't think it's a reason t- that you stay together. But-

Andrew Schulz 37:11 I mean, it would hurt if she's sleeping with someone else, 100%. But I wouldn't go there until they did, and I wouldn't be heartbroken off of the hypothetical.

Chris Williamson 37:19 Mm.

Andrew Schulz 37:19 I would be sad because now this person I really love is no longer in my life. That's me personally. I don't know, how do you think about it? Have you been heartbroken before?

Chris Williamson 37:27 Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 37:28 And, and what was it a- ... Was it ... Was the heartbreak about that person being with other guys?

Chris Williamson 37:32 No.

Andrew Schulz 37:32 No, right?

Chris Williamson 37:33 No, it wasn't. But there was, there was some juvenile possessiveness that came through, um, like after the fact. Like ex-girlfriends, and even girls that I was just seeing for a while-

Andrew Schulz 37:43 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 37:43 And you're like, "Why the fuck is this sort of, this f- fear, and resentment, and bitterness around them moving on when I didn't want to be with them no more?"

Andrew Schulz 37:52 Yeah. But you don't want them to stop wanting you.

Chris Williamson 37:55 Yes. Yes.

Andrew Schulz 37:55 Yeah. We're insecure.

Chris Williamson 37:56 But that's super juvenile. That's very, very immature.

Andrew Schulz 37:58 I don't even know if it's ... Yeah, I think it's just insecure. I don't even know if it's juvenile. I just think it's insecurity, and that's our insecurity, is like we still want to be loved.

Chris Williamson 38:05 Mm-hmm.

Andrew Schulz 38:05 And if you fucking this other guy, what, you, you stop loving me?

Chris Williamson 38:08 You can't love me anymore. Yep, yep.

Andrew Schulz 38:09 That's crazy. Like, I still want that love so I could move on with ease. The greatest gift you can give a woman in a breakup is hating you.

Chris Williamson 38:16 Because it's easier.

Andrew Schulz 38:17 For her.

Chris Williamson 38:18 Yes.

Andrew Schulz 38:18 But we all try to do this soft landing shit where we're like, "Oh, let's be friends," whatever, 'cause we're selfish. Right? It's like, I don't want to be the one inducing this pain in you, so we'll do this very easy calm break that's way more painful for them because they're not really broken up.

Chris Williamson 38:34 They haven't got a reason to hate you.

Andrew Schulz 38:35 And we're still getting all the love that we want, 'cause we don't want that love to stop immediately.

Chris Williamson 38:39 Mm-hmm.

Andrew Schulz 38:39 So yeah, but the greatest gift you can give, hatred.

Chris Williamson 38:43 I heard that, um, people who are scared of breaking up with a partner because they're worried about how it's going to make them feel, mostly guys to girls, uh, that that's not a sign of empathy, it's a sign of narcissism.

Andrew Schulz 38:54 100%.

Chris Williamson 38:55 You think that you are so important-

Andrew Schulz 38:59 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 38:59 ... that this girl, who had lived her entire life up until the moment that she met you-

Andrew Schulz 39:02 Yeah, she won't be able to get over it.

Chris Williamson 39:03 ... can no longer exist-

Andrew Schulz 39:04 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 39:04 ... after you decide to drop the bomb.

Andrew Schulz 39:06 I thought when X was gonna kill herself. How arrogant is that? I'm like, "How could she live without me?" (laughs) You know what I mean? Like, I called her mom. I was like, "You better check on her." Like, I'm not in her life, you know what I'm saying? (laughs) That's ludicrous. Isn't that?

Chris Williamson 39:19 Meanwhile, she's fine.

Andrew Schulz 39:19 Exactly. But, yeah.

Chris Williamson 39:21 Sad but

Chris Williamson 39:22 fine.

Andrew Schulz 39:22 Yeah. Yeah.

Chris Williamson 39:23 Speaking of Tate.

Andrew Schulz 39:24 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 39:25 Tate versus Jake Paul.

Andrew Schulz 39:26 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 39:26 What do you think happens?

Andrew Schulz 39:28 I don't know, are they actually gonna fight?

Chris Williamson 39:29 They had a face off. I think if they don't, it is ... Even for somebody that has as many resources as both of those guys do, they're dropping the bag big time if they don't do it, surely. I mean, there's gotta be ... Name me a bigger fight that could happen that would draw more normal public attention than Jake Paul fighting Andrew Tate.

Andrew Schulz 39:49 Bigger fight. Uh, Jake Paul versus Canelo Alvarez.

Chris Williamson 39:52 Mm-hmm.

Andrew Schulz 39:52 That would be bigger.

Chris Williamson 39:53 Mm-hmm.

Andrew Schulz 39:54 I think in order for the fight to be big, Jake needs to be the heel.

Chris Williamson 39:57 That's the fucking interesting question.

Andrew Schulz 39:58 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 39:59 That's the interesting question.

Andrew Schulz 40:00 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 40:01 What sort of fucking world have we got ourselves into-

Andrew Schulz 40:03 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 40:03 ... where Jake Paul's the hero-

Andrew Schulz 40:04 He's the face.

Chris Williamson 40:05 ... in a fucking facedown? (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 40:06 Yeah. Yeah.

Chris Williamson 40:06 Like, only, only if you find, like, a guy from the, the depths of, like, the fucking ninth circle-

Andrew Schulz 40:12 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 40:12 ... and drag him out, and here's Andrew Tate-

Andrew Schulz 40:14 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 40:14 ... as the fucking bad guy.

Andrew Schulz 40:15 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 40:16 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 40:17 It's crazy.

Chris Williamson 40:17 You're like, "Are we supporting fucking Jake Paul now?"

Andrew Schulz 40:19 And I don't know if he will. I mean, I'm just, I just know for me, like, I think actually this could be an absolutely amazing fight. And Jake might've gotten too good for this to be as successful, but Jake Paul versus Nate Diaz, to me, was always the ultimate one. And I think Jake has actually gotten too much respect for that to be as interesting. Like, I think most people go into that fight going, "Oh, I think Jake will beat up Nate Diaz."

Chris Williamson 40:41 Really?

Andrew Schulz 40:42 Before, there was like, "There's no chance."

Chris Williamson 40:43 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 40:43 But we also said that about Anderson Silva, we said that about Tyron Woodley, we said it about all these people. We're gonna have to accept that Jake is a really fucking good boxer. So, but I think the best fight is Jake against a qualified MMA guy that people love, and Jake is the heel, and he's doing what he does best, which is troll, antagonize. I mean, he is masterful.

Chris Williamson 41:02 Well, did we not, did we not see McGregor versus, uh, Mayweather as an absolute super fight? That's two heels.

Andrew Schulz 41:10 Yeah, and, and it was really interesting that, like, Mayweather almost became a face, and he didn't know what to do.

Chris Williamson 41:14 Hmm.

Andrew Schulz 41:15 Yeah. McGregor sold that fight.

Chris Williamson 41:16 But would you not love, would you not love to see what happens when, like, an immovable object meets a- an unstoppable force-

Andrew Schulz 41:22 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 41:22 ... at the press conference?

Andrew Schulz 41:23 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 41:23 I'm very pro-Tate P- Tate Paul.

Andrew Schulz 41:26 Oh, I ... Listen-

Chris Williamson 41:26 Like massively fucking-

Andrew Schulz 41:27 ... if they can make money off of it, I want them to make money. I just don't know why Tate would do it. But again, I don't have an idea of his finances. Like, I- if, if you told me Jake- if you told me Tate is worth $200 million, I would say, "No, there's no reason to do this at all." Like, to risk permanent damage. He's, he's already said he has, like, some cornea issues-

Chris Williamson 41:43 Hmm.

Andrew Schulz 41:43 ... or eye issues. Like, this isn't gonna be fucking good for you.

Chris Williamson 41:46 I think he's maybe 34, 35, something like that.

Andrew Schulz 41:49 Yeah, it's, it's not ... If you have 100 million, you couldn't get me to do shit with 100 million. 100 million, bro?

Chris Williamson 41:55 Just in bed.

Andrew Schulz 41:57 I'm not fighting. For 100 million, nah. Like, I don't know why you would do that. Because now what are you doing it for? You're doing it to prove something to the public? I guess you, you know, went back and forth with him. But Jake is a legit fucking boxer, man. Like, this guy's dedicated his life to it. And he was young, younger when he got into it. He's not one of these, like, 40-year-old guys that does the celebrity boxing. The kid was in his early 20s and then dedicated every fucking second every day to it.

Chris Williamson 42:21 Mm-hmm.

Andrew Schulz 42:22 You know? So, yeah, I don't know if I'm Tate if I would do that. I wouldn't do that if I'm Tate.

Chris Williamson 42:27 Because you got the money, why risk it? And then, I suppose one of the risks for this is every single time that Jake Paul steps into the ring with somebody, he can only win. If he gets beaten, he goes, "Look, it was fucking Anderson Silva, Tyron Woodley, it was whoever. They are this illustrious." It's Canelo Alvarez, it's J- it's fucking Andrew Tate, right? You know, four-time kickboxing world champion. Every single person that steps in must have, like, ass-splitting nerves about, "If this guy fucking knocks me out ..."

Andrew Schulz 42:53 I'm an embarrassment.

Chris Williamson 42:54 Correct.

Andrew Schulz 42:55 How can you be the top G? It's not very top G to lose to Jake Paul.

Chris Williamson 42:59 Maybe it doesn't happen. You've made me think that it doesn't happen anymore.

Andrew Schulz 43:01 I would never do it if I'm Andrew Tate. Because the reality is-Jake Paul's probably gonna beat you. And that's not saying that you're not an incredible fighter. Clearly he's a fucking kickboxing world champion, like one of the best kickboxers of his time. There's no doubt, right? We know that for a fact. You probably haven't kickboxed in years. If you've done any training at all, you know that the instincts, not just the muscles atrophy, the instincts do, the timing does. Like you take a year off, the timing's not there. This guy Jake has been in the fucking ring. Now granted, he's big. I mean, how, how tall is Andrew?

Chris Williamson 43:38 Six-two probably. Six-three.

Andrew Schulz 43:39 Oh, I thought he was taller. Okay. So they're- they're about the same-

Chris Williamson 43:41 Six-two, six-three probably, yeah.

Andrew Schulz 43:41 ... they're about the same height. Uh, yeah, I wouldn't do it if I'm Andrew, especially if you've got 100 mil in the bank. That's ... there's no way.

Chris Williamson 43:46 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 43:46 There's no way. What?

Chris Williamson 43:48 Yeah. Yeah. Legacy counts for a lot, man. But then-

Andrew Schulz 43:49 To impress some 14-year-olds on the internet?

Chris Williamson 43:51 (sighs) Yeah. I w- I, I was adamant it was gonna h- All right, so who does Jake fight next, do you think?

Andrew Schulz 43:56 Nate Diaz.

Chris Williamson 43:57 Nate Diaz? That's the one that you would make if you were the fucking king maker?

Andrew Schulz 44:01 Nate Diaz. 'Cause you wanna rile up the MMA crowd. You want everybody in MMA ... MMA is bigger than boxing, right? Now, so it's like you want everybody in MMA to be rooting for the MMA guy, 'cause you have to tap into like a stream that's bigger than you.

Chris Williamson 44:13 Mm-hmm.

Andrew Schulz 44:13 If you really wanna make things big, it can't be just you're following, my following. We have to discuss an issue that all these other people also feel and ideally they don't even know who the fuck we are, but they tap into our conversation.

Chris Williamson 44:25 So you want tribalism? You want in-group, out-group. You want them and us.

Andrew Schulz 44:29 Bare minimum, tribal curiosity.

Chris Williamson 44:32 Yep.

Andrew Schulz 44:32 So like when we put out ... I imagine you're gonna put out clips from this podcast. Every one of those clips is gonna tap into an issue. Not you, not me. Maybe there are a couple of clips about Schultz about this, but it will be about a topic that's bigger than the both of us and ideally people who don't even know who the fuck we are find us, they find you, they go, "I like the way this guy talks in interviews. Maybe I'll listen to his other stuff."

Chris Williamson 44:51 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 44:51 But we're tapping into something bigger, right? Like so what's the umbrella? That's what I'm looking at when I look at a fight with them. I'm like okay, what's the umbrella? The MMA crowd is desperately trying to prove that they're as qualified strikers as boxers. The boxers are desperately trying to prove that boxing is a much better martial art, is a much better form of defense, and you have those two groups using Jake and whoever he's fighting as proxies.

Chris Williamson 45:17 Yes.

Andrew Schulz 45:17 Do you know what I mean? It's like the war in Ukraine, right? It's like Afghanistan. You don't really want the fight ... The fight ain't about the Taliban versus whatever. It's about United States versus Russia. That's what I want the boxing match to be. So that, and I want, you know, the, whoever's boxing to make the most fucking money possible. It's a horrible way to make a living, so I hope Jake makes fucking tens of millions of dollars and then retires. Soon.

Chris Williamson 45:39 So w- he was talking about he's already getting some, was it speech slurring or maybe something was up with his thoughts?

Andrew Schulz 45:44 That's what he was saying, that it's affecting his speech, man.

Chris Williamson 45:45 Bro, can you imagine? What time? How old is he now, like 26, 27?

Andrew Schulz 45:49 Maybe not even, dude.

Chris Williamson 45:50 Right, okay.

Andrew Schulz 45:50 Maybe not even.

Chris Williamson 45:50 So let's say, let's say that Jake Paul's 26, 25, 26, and he's been doing this full-time five years-

Andrew Schulz 45:56 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 45:56 ... four years? Something like that?

Andrew Schulz 45:57 That's quick.

Chris Williamson 45:58 And in the space of that long, is seeing neurodegeneration, his speech is changing, something up with his eye, da da da da da da da da. Fucking wild, man.

Andrew Schulz 46:10 Yep. Yep. And that's what I'm saying, the kid is committed.

Chris Williamson 46:12 (laughs) Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 46:12 He's committed.

Chris Williamson 46:12 Because you're putting not only your health, but literally your lifespan on the line as well. Like Jake has 100% lost maybe months, maybe years from the amount of time he's going to be alive because he wants to pursue this purpose, sport at the moment.

Andrew Schulz 46:28 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 46:28 Fucking insane.

Andrew Schulz 46:29 That's who you're dealing with.

Chris Williamson 46:30 Yes.

Andrew Schulz 46:30 So think about that.

Chris Williamson 46:31 Someone that's prepared to kill themselves sooner. Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 46:34 You're dealing with that level of commit- ... Are you that committed? You got 100 million in the bank, you got private jets, you're the top G, you got all these girls, you got Bugattis, you got everything. You're dealing with the kid who's willing to give it all away. You have it all. He's trying to get to top G, if he has it all. I don't know how much money he has. I'm assuming he has that much money. I'm never taking that. You gotta be crazy. I mean, I give him a lot of respect for doing it because if he honors martial arts that much or something, whatever fucking bullshit, but no fucking way. Uh-uh. No.

Chris Williamson 47:04 Fat point?

Andrew Schulz 47:05 That kid's hungry.

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Chris Williamson 47:59 Do you know why people don't fuck their sisters?

Andrew Schulz 48:03 (sighs) Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Chris Williamson 48:11 Why?

Andrew Schulz 48:14 Um, (sighs) it's just too much fun.

Chris Williamson 48:20 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 48:20 Just ... (laughs) You know? It's like it fits.

Chris Williamson 48:24 Ugly, ugly sisters?

Andrew Schulz 48:25 It fits perfect, you know. It's like it's Lego, you know what I mean?

Chris Williamson 48:29 So I learned about this. I gotta fucking-

Andrew Schulz 48:31 (laughs)

Chris Williamson 48:31 I gotta tell you, I gotta fucking-

Andrew Schulz 48:33 No, I don't know. I don't know.

Chris Williamson 48:34 I gotta tell you about this shit. So I learned this shit, I gotta tell you about it, right?

Andrew Schulz 48:36 Yeah, yeah.

Chris Williamson 48:37 So there's something called the Westermarck effect, right?

Andrew Schulz 48:39 Okay.

Chris Williamson 48:39 (clicks tongue) What it seems like happens, um, let's say that me and you are brother and sister.

Andrew Schulz 48:43 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 48:44 I can't tell that you're my genetic relative, right? There's no, um, like fucking little code on your face.

Andrew Schulz 48:50 No smell or anything?

Chris Williamson 48:51 There's ... Uh, you would be able to notice, uh, an affinity, but you wouldn't necessarily ... You're not disgusted, sexually disgusted because of that. The reason is because of this thing called the Westermarck effect.

Andrew Schulz 48:59 Okay.

Chris Williamson 48:59 So what happens is infants that are raised together for a good amount of time throughout their infancy, usually between the age of like one to two until, uh, like puberty age-

Andrew Schulz 49:10 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 49:11 What they do is they look at their parents and the family around them and they see who is mom giving attention to? Who am I being raised with? Who's she breastfeeding? If you're the older sibling, you look at, um, w-... did that baby, like, come out of mum and around the time of labor, was she holding this baby that then became my brother or sister. And that's called the Westmark window, right?

Andrew Schulz 49:30 Mm-hmm.

Chris Williamson 49:30 So you have this period of time, and what you get is this sexual disgust imprinting. So that's why you don't have sex. Not because of some inbuilt fucking innate, "I know that you're my brother or sister." It's because of this window.

Andrew Schulz 49:41 Mm-hmm.

Chris Williamson 49:41 Now the interesting thing happens when brother and sister are split apart at birth.

Andrew Schulz 49:45 They'll fuck?

Chris Williamson 49:47 Not necessarily. But, well, I mean, in the same, like, amount of hit rate that two random people on the street would do. But they don't have sexual disgust because they haven't lived together for that time.

Andrew Schulz 49:58 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 49:58 Same thing goes for the father that leaves the daughter's life and then comes back in later in life, and you think maybe already daddy issues. But also there's something about this person. It seems like humans have a predisposition, they have a, an affinity toward people that resemble them a little bit.

Andrew Schulz 50:13 Mm-hmm.

Chris Williamson 50:13 You actually see, you'll see them, if you look at couples walking down the street, and you go, like, "You kind of look alike a little bit."

Andrew Schulz 50:19 Mm-hmm.

Chris Williamson 50:19 And there is an affinity for that. So what you end up with is this very dangerous situation where two, a brother and sister, they've been taken apart, can then come back together and they don't have that sexual disgust. In Indonesia, there was a period where families would adopt the daughter of another family when she was a newborn and betroth her to their son, raise them together.

Andrew Schulz 50:41 (laughs)

Chris Williamson 50:41 But what they didn't realize was that they were putting them through this Westmark window.

Andrew Schulz 50:45 Oh, yee.

Chris Williamson 50:45 And it meant that even though they weren't genetically related, they had sexual disgust.

Andrew Schulz 50:48 They were disgusted.

Chris Williamson 50:49 Yeah. How interesting is that?

Andrew Schulz 50:51 Fuck. So what would happen? Would they have sex with one another?

Chris Williamson 50:55 With difficulty. I mean, like, brother and s-... brothers and sisters have done it before, but it's fucking hard. Like, it's very, very ingrained-

Andrew Schulz 51:01 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 51:01 ... to do that.

Andrew Schulz 51:02 We should give them some credit, like...

Chris Williamson 51:04 For getting past it?

Andrew Schulz 51:05 Yeah, like, we...

Chris Williamson 51:05 A lot of Viagra and a fucking good porno or whatever?

Andrew Schulz 51:07 No, but we tease all these, like, Southerners that are like, "Oh, it's all incest," blah, blah, blah, these, like, brother fuckers, whatever like that. But, like, I guess what you're trying to say is, like, we should honor them for, for their ability to break through the Westmark barrier, right?

Chris Williamson 51:19 (laughs) No.

Andrew Schulz 51:19 Is that what your point is?

Chris Williamson 51:20 That's not my point.

Andrew Schulz 51:21 Did you bring this up to, to, to-

Chris Williamson 51:22 Justify incest. I want-

Andrew Schulz 51:24 Not justify it, like-

Chris Williamson 51:24 ... more incest.

Andrew Schulz 51:25 Give them a medal.

Chris Williamson 51:27 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 51:27 Be like, like, "You couldn't fuck your sister, you pussy." You know what I mean?

Chris Williamson 51:31 Let me fuck you.

Andrew Schulz 51:31 But that guy did.

Chris Williamson 51:32 Well, I know that you don't have a sister.

Andrew Schulz 51:34 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 51:35 And I'm an only child. So they didn't-

Andrew Schulz 51:37 That you know of. You could've smashed out your sister in Leeds or something like that.

Chris Williamson 51:41 You think?

Andrew Schulz 51:41 You could've been up in Leeds.

Chris Williamson 51:42 Oh, fuck-

Andrew Schulz 51:43 You know?

Chris Williamson 51:43 ... separated at birth.

Andrew Schulz 51:44 (laughs)

Chris Williamson 51:44 She had curly hair and a big jawline and a fucking stupid accent.

Andrew Schulz 51:48 Dude, imagine. Adopted people, gotta worry about all the time.

Chris Williamson 51:51 Do you not remember, um, that sperm donor guy? There was that documentary on Netflix, that dude that it turned out he was the fertility doctor and he was using his own sperm.

Andrew Schulz 51:59 This was in Brazil or something like that?

Chris Williamson 52:00 No, it was in the US.

Andrew Schulz 52:01 Oh, really?

Chris Williamson 52:02 It's, it's on Netflix now. It's fucking brilliant.

Andrew Schulz 52:04 Oh, that's wild.

Chris Williamson 52:04 In the US. Yeah, oh.

Andrew Schulz 52:05 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Chris Williamson 52:05 And, um, this guy-

Andrew Schulz 52:06 Oh, yeah. He, like... Oh, that's right, the whole town was his.

Chris Williamson 52:08 Like, 40... Yeah, like, fucking everybody. And they were all thinking-

Andrew Schulz 52:11 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 52:11 ... a- apparently one of the women said exactly that.

Andrew Schulz 52:13 Which was?

Chris Williamson 52:13 She was like waiting for the list of names to come through and praying that it wasn't an ex-boyfriend.

Andrew Schulz 52:17 Oh, yee.

Chris Williamson 52:20 But remember about that, like, she-

Andrew Schulz 52:21 But can we also point this out? Like, a lot of them wouldn't have gotten, like, doctor genetics. Now I'm not saying they should be grateful, right?

Chris Williamson 52:30 Mm-hmm.

Andrew Schulz 52:30 But (laughs) but you know? But, like, they're probably objectively smarter because of this evil scientist.

Chris Williamson 52:37 No, fertility, fertility doctor.

Andrew Schulz 52:38 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 52:39 Like, I mean, is that-

Andrew Schulz 52:40 Is that not MD?

Chris Williamson 52:40 I don't know. I don't know. Maybe, but they got psychopath genetics.

Andrew Schulz 52:44 Listen, it's bad. It's bad what he did.

Chris Williamson 52:45 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 52:45 But all those kids are smarter.

Chris Williamson 52:46 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 52:46 Imagine their dumb dads, do you know what I mean, fixing plumbing all day and shit like that, coming home to this smart-ass fucking kid, right? (laughs) Don't... Hey, Gymshark, don't cancel me.

Chris Williamson 52:56 Yeah. (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 52:58 But, but, like, think about it, like, they're smarter because of it. They were able to figure it out because of that fucking doctor gene. One of those kids got to the bottom of it-

Chris Williamson 53:06 Because of the...

Andrew Schulz 53:06 ... and that's the father's fault.

Chris Williamson 53:07 Be- because of the gift that the father gave them. Yeah, coming back.

Andrew Schulz 53:10 D- done. Done.

Chris Williamson 53:10 So they did, they did a study where they got guys to imagine tongue-kissing their sister, right?

Andrew Schulz 53:15 Ugh.

Chris Williamson 53:16 You pulled the face. So what they were doing was they were videoing the facial expressions-

Andrew Schulz 53:20 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 53:20 ... of these guys. And-

Andrew Schulz 53:21 I was doing this because sh- my sister would also have a big nose, so I was, like, just getting out of the way of it. Yeah. Ugh, ugh.

Chris Williamson 53:25 Uh, i- it hits the mic sometimes, I've noticed. Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 53:27 Ugh.

Chris Williamson 53:27 Um, and, uh, they had... They were tracking their facial expressions and they can, um, categorize them.

Andrew Schulz 53:32 Yeah, yeah.

Chris Williamson 53:32 They could say, "This is disgust. This is happiness. This is blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah."

Andrew Schulz 53:35 Yeah, yeah.

Chris Williamson 53:35 And they found that right on cue, some of the guys were like, "Ugh." And some of the dudes were so far back that the camera went out of focus. However, the guys that didn't have sisters showed a, like, a disproportionate amount of, like, smiles curling at the edge of the mouth (laughs) . Because it's like, there's no sexual... There's no, uh, like, incest aversion. There's no sexual disgust for that.

Andrew Schulz 53:57 Yeah. Why do you think we're so into, like, the stepsisters and that kind of shit?

Chris Williamson 54:00 Fucking fascinating question. I don't know why. Like, incest porn and stepmom porn.

Andrew Schulz 54:04 That's popping right now, isn't it?

Chris Williamson 54:06 The incest porn shit?

Andrew Schulz 54:06 Yeah, and the stepmom porn.

Chris Williamson 54:08 Well, I think this, the MILF thing-

Andrew Schulz 54:09 Do you think that's pandemic-related? Like, we're all in the house together and it's like the only person you're seeing is your stepmom?

Chris Williamson 54:14 Maybe. There's definitely something to do with the MILF thing, which is, like, an older, more powerful woman that can say what she wants. I think that's one-

Andrew Schulz 54:22 That's attractive?

Chris Williamson 54:23 I think that's one of the reasons that guys go toward the MILF thing. I mean, why do you th-... Why, why are people fucking-

Andrew Schulz 54:28 But that's what g- guys are turned on by that?

Chris Williamson 54:30 Some guys are. Some guys are turned on by, like, fucking cuck porn and all sorts of stuff.

Andrew Schulz 54:35 Yeah, what do you think about that? That cuck thing is so odd.

Chris Williamson 54:38 I really can't come up with-

Andrew Schulz 54:39 Oh, yeah. We were talking about that the other day.

Chris Williamson 54:40 ... an answer. I-

Andrew Schulz 54:40 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Chris Williamson 54:40 ... I really can't come up with a good example or a good s-... a good explanation for it. I've got a guy coming on next year who's one of the premier researchers into cuckin'. Um, so I'm gonna ask him and I'll find out, like, what it is that...

Andrew Schulz 54:50 He's the premier (laughs) ?

Chris Williamson 54:51 One of them. There's not many.

Andrew Schulz 54:53 Imagine, imagine being, like, the worst.

Chris Williamson 54:55 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 54:55 Like, yeah, I'm one of the worst researchers in cuck porn. Like, I... Listen, I watch my wife get fucked a lot. Like, I've been in the room.

Chris Williamson 55:01 No idea why it's happening.

Andrew Schulz 55:02 Yeah. I just can't figure out-

Chris Williamson 55:04 Just-

Andrew Schulz 55:04 ... why I love it so much. Like... (laughs)

Chris Williamson 55:07 Fuck. That's-

Andrew Schulz 55:08 The premier researcher? Has he tried it? Is it-

Chris Williamson 55:11 I-

Andrew Schulz 55:11 ... like some Keynesian shit where, like, he's doing all the experiments?

Chris Williamson 55:13 Oh, he's doing it for himself. I have no idea. I don't know, man. But-

Andrew Schulz 55:16 I mean, what we're saying out there is that, that you're trying to control an uncontrollable situation, right?

Chris Williamson 55:20 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 55:20 Like...... you're getting cheated on a lot, so you're like, "Okay, I'm just gonna allow this," as if you're in charge. But-

Chris Williamson 55:26 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 55:26 ... being in the room and watching it as a way to, like, almost desensitize yourself? Yeah, I don't know.

Chris Williamson 55:31 Dude, I have a friend who, uh, was trying non-monogamy for the first time and his wife was upstairs banging her boyfriend while he was downstairs dry retching on all fours on the bathroom, like, b- bathroom counter. And his-

Andrew Schulz 55:44 Dry retching? What is that? Oh, throwing up?

Chris Williamson 55:46 Blegh. Blegh.

Andrew Schulz 55:46 Oh, wow. Right.

Chris Williamson 55:47 Like, had nothing to bring up, but just-

Andrew Schulz 55:49 Yeah, yeah.

Chris Williamson 55:49 ... felt like-

Andrew Schulz 55:49 But she was also up there like, "Ugh."

Chris Williamson 55:52 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 55:53 Like, isn't that interesting that, like, she was on all fours also dry retching, you know?

Chris Williamson 55:56 Fucking in, in unison together. It's like, "We're still together."

Andrew Schulz 56:00 (laughs)

Chris Williamson 56:00 Um, and he said, he justified it-

Andrew Schulz 56:03 "This is fun, mate."

Chris Williamson 56:07 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 56:07 (laughs)

Chris Williamson 56:07 Pip, pip. And, uh, yeah, he was like, oh, it was ... At the time, he's now, uh, realized different. At the time he was like, "Dude, I think I was just working through my trauma, you know? Like, I was just letting go of the ego."

Andrew Schulz 56:18 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 56:18 "I was allowing it to evaporate."

Andrew Schulz 56:19 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 56:19 I'm like, "Maybe, maybe that's just something that you shouldn't be doing." Maybe you just-

Andrew Schulz 56:25 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 56:26 Maybe-

Andrew Schulz 56:26 That's such an excuse for everything that we do that's fucked up, is, "I was working through my trauma." You know? Like, no, no, no. You just ... Something's off right there, my dude. Also, we have too many names for things. We gotta stop naming weird shit, 'cause it normalizes it.

Chris Williamson 56:38 What, like, like cooking?

Andrew Schulz 56:39 Non-monogamy. It's like-

Chris Williamson 56:41 Mm-hmm.

Andrew Schulz 56:41 No, no. Cuck- it, it just ... Describe it and then you're gonna feel embarrassed and then you won't do it. Don't-

Chris Williamson 56:46 Un-

Andrew Schulz 56:46 ... th- write a name.

Chris Williamson 56:47 Uncircumcised.

Andrew Schulz 56:48 Oh, yeah. Yeah, I've told you about that one. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You saw that on PBD.

Chris Williamson 56:52 Damn fucking right, I did.

Andrew Schulz 56:53 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Chris Williamson 56:53 What the fuck is going on?

Andrew Schulz 56:55 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Chris Williamson 56:55 It blew my, blew my mind.

Andrew Schulz 56:56 Yeah, yeah.

Chris Williamson 56:56 Explain uncircumcised.

Andrew Schulz 56:58 Uh, yeah, it's just a stupid word. There's just no point for the word. Yeah. There's just, it's circumcise and dick, that's what I was saying. Yeah, we don't, we don't call things un-gay. You know what I mean? (laughs) But this is (laughs) , the joke that I was trying to make, it was, it was obviously with all the Kanye stuff and the, you know, Jews being in control of the media. So in my mind I'm like, all right, what's the funniest way where I can make the argument that Jews do control the media?

Chris Williamson 57:19 Mm-hmm.

Andrew Schulz 57:19 And then I thought about, uh, the, the dicks. And I was like, yeah, I'm circumcised. Well, I have a Jewish dick. I'm not Jewish, but I have, my dick is Jewish. And, uh, that seems pretty good control.

Chris Williamson 57:29 I was in the car with a friend-

Andrew Schulz 57:30 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 57:30 ... a couple of weeks ago and his girlfriend was sat next to me. We were talking about-

Andrew Schulz 57:33 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 57:33 ... this exact thing.

Andrew Schulz 57:34 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 57:34 And she went, "Uh, honey." Uh, close your ears for a second.

Andrew Schulz 57:37 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 57:37 "I have seen a lot of dick in my life."

Andrew Schulz 57:40 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 57:41 "I have never seen one that's got a foreskin." And I was like, "Wow."

Andrew Schulz 57:44 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 57:44 If you're in the UK, you would've struggled to see one that-

Andrew Schulz 57:46 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 57:46 ... didn't have a foreskin.

Andrew Schulz 57:47 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 57:48 In fact, if you're Brian, you have too much.

Andrew Schulz 57:49 Yeah. (laughs)

Chris Williamson 57:50 Like, you've got way more than you need.

Andrew Schulz 57:52 (laughs)

Chris Williamson 57:52 Fucking 90% foreskin.

Andrew Schulz 57:54 Yeah. Yeah. (laughs) He could use it as a burka. Like-

Chris Williamson 57:56 (laughs) Pull the back up and over the head.

Andrew Schulz 57:58 But he's gonna do, he's gonna do, he's gonna, when he becomes Muslim, he's gonna get circumcised, and then-

Chris Williamson 58:01 Step into it like a sleeping bag?

Andrew Schulz 58:02 That's what ... (laughs) That's for his new bride, bro.

Chris Williamson 58:05 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 58:05 That's for his new bride. Oh, Brian. But, yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's a, it's, no, it's a fascinating term that just, yeah, getting ... Yeah, it's such a weird thing.

Chris Williamson 58:15 Why is it that so many Americans-

Andrew Schulz 58:17 Are circumcised?

Chris Williamson 58:17 ... that aren't Jewish are circumcised?

Andrew Schulz 58:19 Um, why, what is Kanye's answer? No.

Chris Williamson 58:23 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 58:23 Uh, no. I think it, I think it became, like, a health thing at one point, like people thought it was healthier. I've looked it up a little bit, but it is like a, it is an odd tradition, right?

Chris Williamson 58:31 Mm-hmm.

Andrew Schulz 58:32 And what's so interesting about it is the way that women perceive it. Like, women in America are, I don't wanna say repulsed, but they're not into the, the whole thing.

Chris Williamson 58:42 Intact. Yeah, yeah.

Andrew Schulz 58:43 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 58:44 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 58:44 And, um, it is ca- it is just f- it is a fascinating thing that, like, you could create perception and create a, a version to something that is natural.

Chris Williamson 58:58 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 58:58 Like the way it's supposed to look. You know? Even now.

Chris Williamson 59:01 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 59:01 Like, I'm like, "Mine looks better."

Chris Williamson 59:03 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 59:03 You know?

Chris Williamson 59:04 Well, that was Bill Maher's take. Bill Maher had-

Andrew Schulz 59:06 Which was, what did he say?

Chris Williamson 59:06 He, he just said that it's, it's so ugly. And I'm like, well-

Andrew Schulz 59:09 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 59:09 ... that, that's kind of the same as saying, like, someone that hasn't chopped an arm off-

Andrew Schulz 59:13 Yeah, yeah.

Chris Williamson 59:13 ... is, is more-

Andrew Schulz 59:14 Yeah, yeah.

Chris Williamson 59:14 ... more ugly.

Andrew Schulz 59:15 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 59:15 But it, it's so fucking ... You're so right about it being like a, a cultural conditioning thing.

Andrew Schulz 59:19 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 59:20 This is what you're used to or what-

Andrew Schulz 59:23 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 59:23 ... you think, and there's some sort of, like, predisposition around it-

Andrew Schulz 59:26 But augmenting things does make them better.

Chris Williamson 59:28 You're taking away ... So here's the, here's the-

Andrew Schulz 59:30 But we do that all the time, right? We take away fat, you look better. You know, we, we add-

Chris Williamson 59:34 Sure.

Andrew Schulz 59:34 ... jawline, we do these other things.

Chris Williamson 59:36 I'll get into the fucking meat and potatoes of it. Uh, you have a gossamer thin amount of fucking tissue-

Andrew Schulz 59:42 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 59:42 ... on, on the fucking corona of the penis.

Andrew Schulz 59:44 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 59:44 Right?

Andrew Schulz 59:44 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 59:45 That's protected by the foreskin, or the bell end as we call it-

Andrew Schulz 59:48 The bell end, yeah.

Chris Williamson 59:49 ... in the UK. Yeah, like bell end, fucking brilliant insult. Calling someone a bell end-

Andrew Schulz 59:51 Bell end.

Chris Williamson 59:51 ... is so satisfying.

Andrew Schulz 59:53 Yeah, I dig it.

Chris Williamson 59:53 Um, you get, like, keratinized bell ends over time, like the head of the penis becomes like fucking ... So you've got, I can only imagine that Jewish women have got to, like, fucking ... (slaps thighs)

Andrew Schulz 1:00:04 Oh.

Chris Williamson 1:00:05 In order to-

Andrew Schulz 1:00:05 You're saying it loses sensitivity?

Chris Williamson 1:00:06 Abso- 100% loses sensitivity. There is a huge movement online that says male circumcision is genital mutilation for boys-

Andrew Schulz 1:00:14 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:00:14 ... because it downregulates-

Andrew Schulz 1:00:15 It is.

Chris Williamson 1:00:15 ... the amount of pleasure that they can get. And-

Andrew Schulz 1:00:17 But isn't that good? Because maybe our women cum more because of it.

Chris Williamson 1:00:21 Because you can last longer?

Andrew Schulz 1:00:22 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:00:22 Interesting. I'd love to see someone do a study on this, please.

Andrew Schulz 1:00:25 We gotta do a study. That's actually really good.

Chris Williamson 1:00:28 On how many pumps? How many pumps can the fucking-

Andrew Schulz 1:00:29 How many pumps? Because you guys are so sensitive, you're busting all early.

Chris Williamson 1:00:32 Uh-huh.

Andrew Schulz 1:00:32 And we're out here just, you know-

Chris Williamson 1:00:34 Smashing hips.

Andrew Schulz 1:00:35 Just smashing hips, dude.

Chris Williamson 1:00:37 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 1:00:37 We really might be. That's a great fucking point. Shout out the Jews. The Jews knew that w- it's the most feminist thing that they've done.

Chris Williamson 1:00:44 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 1:00:44 The Jews knew, the Jews knew that women need to orgasm, we need to desensitize these dicks. They just had them out there in the desert just dragging along the fucking sand and shit.

Chris Williamson 1:00:53 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 1:00:53 And eventually it got to the point where they're just making their women cum non-fucking-stop (claps hands) . This is brilliant. This is true.

Chris Williamson 1:01:00 It's like someone's chopped the end off a baseball bat and it's fucking just dangling down there.

Andrew Schulz 1:01:03 That's it.

Chris Williamson 1:01:04 This rock hard piece of ... Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 1:01:05 But think about it. If it's helping the women out, and help ... What is the most embarrassing thing as a guy? It's coming too quick.

Chris Williamson 1:01:10 Nutting too soon.

Andrew Schulz 1:01:11 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:01:11 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Andrew Schulz 1:01:12 I think they should've chopped more of mine off, 'cause-

Chris Williamson 1:01:14 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 1:01:14 ... I stay cumming really strong. I think I only got like a half circ.

Chris Williamson 1:01:17 Can I take a bit more off the top, please?

Andrew Schulz 1:01:19 Yeah, take it off, my boy. That is so true.

Chris Williamson 1:01:22 Short back and sides, please.

Andrew Schulz 1:01:23 Yeah. So is it super sensitive for you?

Chris Williamson 1:01:26 Well, I don't know. I haven't got nothing to compare it to.

Andrew Schulz 1:01:28 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:01:28 It's like, fuck, it's a dick.

Andrew Schulz 1:01:29 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:01:29 So I think like, yeah, like-

Andrew Schulz 1:01:30 But like when it comes out, is it like cold? Like ...

Chris Williamson 1:01:32 Uh, not usually temperature checked. I'll, I'll check next time.

Andrew Schulz 1:01:37 But like when you cock it back-

Chris Williamson 1:01:38 I'll do it in the fridge.

Andrew Schulz 1:01:38 ... is, does, do you feel wind?

Chris Williamson 1:01:39 Oh, yeah. If it was breezy, absolutely.

Andrew Schulz 1:01:41 Oh, really?

Chris Williamson 1:01:42 Yeah.

Andrew Schulz 1:01:42 Oh, I don't feel that.

Chris Williamson 1:01:43 What's yours, like the fucking bottom of your foot?

Andrew Schulz 1:01:44 Exactly. Yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:01:45 Like the, the, the-

Andrew Schulz 1:01:45 It's an elbow. Elbow.

Chris Williamson 1:01:46 That cracked like fucking-

Andrew Schulz 1:01:47 Yeah. 100%.

Chris Williamson 1:01:47 ... skin on the back of your heel?

Andrew Schulz 1:01:49 Yes.

Chris Williamson 1:01:49 Right.

Andrew Schulz 1:01:50 Yeah. It's Bert Kreischer's heel.

Chris Williamson 1:01:51 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 1:01:52 (laughs) That's what my-

Chris Williamson 1:01:53 Do you ever have to put one of those Compeed things on that girls that wear heels too much and get like fucking blisters?

Andrew Schulz 1:01:58 No. (laughs)

Chris Williamson 1:01:58 Like if it ever gets like-

Andrew Schulz 1:01:59 Like a Band-Aid?

Chris Williamson 1:01:59 ... fucking rubbing on the zip?

Andrew Schulz 1:02:00 No, no.

Chris Williamson 1:02:00 But you can't go, "Oh, actually you-"

Andrew Schulz 1:02:01 We have underwear in America. Yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:02:03 Yeah. But I was gonna say-

Andrew Schulz 1:02:03 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:02:03 ... if you go without the underwear and you catch it on the back of a fucking zipper or something-

Andrew Schulz 1:02:06 Oh, the zipper?

Chris Williamson 1:02:06 ... you probably wouldn't even notice. You wouldn't even notice.

Andrew Schulz 1:02:08 No. No. No. It's still kind of sensitive, but it's not as sensitive as, as you guys, for sure.

Chris Williamson 1:02:15 Cool.

Andrew Schulz 1:02:15 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:02:15 Let's go back and we can compete later on.

Andrew Schulz 1:02:17 Yeah. Yeah. We'll see which is more... Yeah. We'll just flick it.

Chris Williamson 1:02:19 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 1:02:19 That'd be good. Just see who reacts more.

Chris Williamson 1:02:22 Ugh.

Andrew Schulz 1:02:22 I'm wondering, is mine even that sensitive? That's an interesting one. Ac- that's also another thing, like if you don't get hard, don't feel bad about it. Blame the Jews.

Chris Williamson 1:02:33 Oh, because you desensitized me.

Andrew Schulz 1:02:35 You know what I mean? (laughs) Yeah, exactly. Like, like-

Chris Williamson 1:02:36 It's part of a Jewish conspiracy to give me erectile dysfunction.

Andrew Schulz 1:02:39 Yeah. (laughs)

Chris Williamson 1:02:40 Kanye!

Andrew Schulz 1:02:40 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:02:40 Kanye, talk to us. You've missed one.

Andrew Schulz 1:02:42 Yeah. We call it whiskey dick. It's not whiskey dick. It's yarmulke dick.

Chris Williamson 1:02:45 Jew dick.

Andrew Schulz 1:02:46 Yeah. (laughs)

Chris Williamson 1:02:49 (laughs)

Andrew Schulz 1:02:49 That is good. That is good. See how comedy works, guys? This is fun. (laughs) Now, if I wasn't a comedian, this is just two guys committing a hate crime on a podcast. So thank God. (laughs)

Chris Williamson 1:03:01 (laughs) I've got the light. I've got the light above us.

Andrew Schulz 1:03:03 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:03:03 Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you. Um, fucking

Chris Williamson 1:03:07 here's another one.

Andrew Schulz 1:03:07 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:03:07 So one of my friends, his wife's sister is six foot two without heels, very tall.

Andrew Schulz 1:03:13 Wife's sister-

Chris Williamson 1:03:14 Wife's sister is very, very-

Andrew Schulz 1:03:14 Okay. So True Geordie's sister is six two without heels.

Chris Williamson 1:03:17 (laughs) No, no.

Andrew Schulz 1:03:17 Okay, go on. Go on.

Chris Williamson 1:03:19 Uh, she was walking through a supermarket and she was, uh, lamenting the fact that she can't find a partner that is taller than her. Like women on average want to date someone at least that's not shorter.

Andrew Schulz 1:03:27 Yeah.

Chris Williamson 1:03:27 Right? And, uh, she's struggling and they're walking around the supermarket and they see this guy who's like six foot seven of the far side, apparently really good-looking dude. And, uh, she sees him on the edge of the aisle and she's like, "Oh, wow." Sort of nudges the sister and