Modern WisdomDoes Anyone Care About Men’s Struggles? - Richard Reeves
At a glance
WHAT IT’S REALLY ABOUT
Rethinking Men’s Struggles: Education, Work, Fatherhood, And Cultural Myths
- Richard Reeves and Chris Williamson explore how rapid social, economic, and educational change has left many boys and men structurally disadvantaged and culturally misunderstood. Reeves argues that the term “toxic masculinity” is counterproductive, pushing men out of vital conversations about mature masculinity. They examine male underachievement in education, the labor market’s shift from brawn to brain and care work, and the destabilization of fatherhood as women gain economic independence. Throughout, Reeves insists that supporting boys and men need not roll back women’s gains, but is now necessary for the flourishing of everyone.
IDEAS WORTH REMEMBERING
5 ideasThe term “toxic masculinity” is vague, overused, and alienates men.
Originally coined for a tiny subset of violent incarcerated men, it has become a catchall insult for any disliked male behavior, making ordinary men feel inherently suspect and pushing them away from constructive discussions about mature masculinity.
Boys now lag behind girls at every stage of education for structural reasons.
Girls’ earlier brain development—especially in impulse control and organization—aligns better with school systems that reward homework, planning, and compliance around age 16, while fewer male teachers and less vocational pedagogy further disadvantage boys.
The education system may need sex-sensitive structural reforms, not just tougher boys.
Reeves suggests starting boys in school a year later (“redshirting”), recruiting more male teachers (especially in early years and English), expanding vocational pathways, and using targeted programs to build boys’ non-cognitive skills like impulse control.
Economic change has eroded traditional male jobs while growth is in “feminized” sectors.
Automation and globalization hollowed out manufacturing and brawn-based work, while opportunities expanded in care, education, and services; without a cultural and policy push to normalize men in these roles, many working-class men are left economically and psychologically adrift.
Men’s absence from HEAL professions hurts both men and service users.
With only ~2% male kindergarten teachers and ~15% male care workers, boys lose male role models, male students often perform worse, and male patients or clients lack same-sex carers and therapists—even though targeted scholarships, incentives, and reframing could attract more men.
WORDS WORTH SAVING
5 quotesNobody predicted that once girls and women caught up with boys and men, that they would keep going, and that we would now have a bigger gender gap in higher education than we did 50 years ago, just the other way around.
— Richard Reeves
I think [toxic masculinity] is a toxic term… it’s not just vacuous, it’s actively harmful.
— Richard Reeves
The left essentially says, ‘You just need to be like your sister and you’ll be okay,’ and the right says, ‘You need to be like your dad and you’ll be okay.’ And meanwhile us men… are trying to figure this out, and neither of those messages are very helpful.
— Richard Reeves
We haven’t really tried yet to help men make that transition, which means that for a lot of men, especially working-class men, that’s a pretty tough transition… They’ve got the male jobs disappearing, the female jobs rising, and men stuck between the two.
— Richard Reeves
You have to decide: are you interested in inequality, or you’re interested in girls and women? Because we can’t just look through one eye.
— Richard Reeves
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