Modern WisdomHow to Become the Best at What You Do - World’s #1 Restaurant Owner
CHAPTERS
- 0:00 – 5:43
Measuring success by your 14-year-old self (and staying childlike)
Chris and Will riff on the idea that a powerful metric of success is whether your younger self would be proud of who you became. Will argues you don’t need to “grow up,” just learn to act like an adult when the situation demands it, while keeping a sense of wonder.
- •14-year-old you as an unusually honest success barometer
- •Two failure modes: not caring what others think vs caring too much
- •Success can trigger fear of not continuing to “earn it” (impostor pressure)
- •“Don’t ever grow up—just act like an adult when you need to”
- •Wonder, levity, and not taking yourself too seriously
- 5:43 – 8:24
How Will’s father (and family hardship) shaped his career and hospitality instincts
Will explains how his father’s example—working long restaurant hours while caring for Will’s mother after a brain cancer diagnosis—became his template for service and love. Those experiences taught him that giving care can be energizing and deeply meaningful.
- •Mother’s illness and father’s selfless caregiving as formative model
- •Letting a mentor guide your career incrementally and patiently
- •Starting at the bottom (busboy, dishwasher) and learning every step
- •Hospitality as a broader craft than restaurants; restaurants as the vehicle
- •Joy from giving: the energy of seeing someone receive a gift
- 8:24 – 10:54
Danny Meyer’s influence: enlightened hospitality and the power of language
Will credits Danny Meyer for providing a scalable cultural framework and for teaching the importance of language in shaping standards. He describes how succinct “isms” become operating principles that teams can repeat and live by.
- •Having a ‘goalpost’ figure who makes your craft aspirational
- •Enlightened hospitality: prioritize employees so they can serve customers well
- •Culture is scalable when you invest in the team first
- •Language creates shorthand that makes values actionable
- •Examples: ‘swan’ composure; ‘constant gentle pressure’ leadership
- 10:54 – 11:24
From fine-dining skepticism to building Eleven Madison Park’s edge
Will recounts joining Eleven Madison Park with the intention to leave quickly, only to discover they could reinvent fine dining with a modern, enjoyable approach. Early accolades arrived, but placing #50 on the World’s 50 Best list sparked a more ambitious plan.
- •Initially didn’t like fine dining; friction between dining room and kitchen priorities
- •Reimagining fine dining with a casual, modern sensibility
- •Relentless excellence while keeping the experience enjoyable
- •Major milestones: NYT four stars, Michelin three stars, World’s 50 Best entry
- •Seeing #50 as ‘last’ became fuel for a new strategy
- 11:24 – 14:31
The napkin moment: choosing ‘unreasonable hospitality’ as the path to #1
After the sting of placing last on the list, Will sets the goal to become #1—but pairs it with a strategy. Since chefs dominated the category through innovation in food, EMP would be ‘unreasonable’ in pursuit of people and human connection.
- •Dad’s maxim: ‘Adversity is a terrible thing to waste’
- •Goal-setting: ‘We will be number one’ isn’t enough without a strategy
- •Differentiation: be relentless about what never changes—human needs
- •Core human desires: feeling seen, cared for, and belonging
- •Naming the strategy: writing ‘unreasonable hospitality’ under the goal
- 14:31 – 17:55
Service vs hospitality: technical perfection vs emotional connection
Will distinguishes service (task execution) from hospitality (how someone feels). He anchors the concept in the Maya Angelou quote and argues that the experiences people remember are those that create genuine human connection.
- •Service is ‘black and white’; hospitality is ‘color’
- •Service: correct execution (right plate, right time)
- •Hospitality: connection, warmth, belonging, being seen
- •Maya Angelou: people remember how you made them feel
- •Unreasonable hospitality = relentless creativity in pursuit of feeling
- 17:55 – 21:11
Mastering touch points: designing the entire guest journey to ‘earn informality’
Will explains how EMP treated the experience like a chef treats a plate—obsessing over every interaction. The team engineered small moments (like greetings) to quickly lower guests’ guard and invite genuine relationship.
- •Hospitality isn’t just ‘hire nice people’; it can be systemized
- •Map every touch point across the customer journey
- •Elevate overlooked moments for outsized impact
- •Remove barriers to warmth (e.g., podium/iPad vibe at host stand)
- •‘Earn informality’: get guests to relax so connection can happen
- 21:11 – 24:15
The hot dog breakthrough: presence, ‘one size fits one,’ and going off-brand on purpose
A table mentions regret about not having a NYC hot dog; Will runs out to buy one and convinces the kitchen to serve it in a fine-dining style. The reaction teaches him what drives unforgettable experiences—and how to turn intuition into intention by studying ‘the tapes.’
- •Listening in real time for what matters to the guest
- •Hot dog story: small, personal gesture beats expensive ingredients
- •Principles: be present; care more than your to-do list; don’t be too self-serious
- •‘One size fits one’: personalization over standardized wow
- •Operationalizing magic: add a ‘Dreamweaver’ role to enable moments
- 24:15 – 29:01
Unreasonable case studies: sleds for kids, ‘space’ for Fallon, and a surprise wedding reception
Will shares standout examples that created lifelong memories: a snow-sled sendoff for kids seeing snow впервые, a space-themed elevator experience inspired by Jimmy Fallon, and a staff-built wedding reception with a first dance for a couple who canceled their big ceremony. He notes these acts transformed not just guests’ emotions but staff morale and engagement.
- •Sleds + hot chocolate + SUV for kids’ first snow experience
- •Re-theming an elevator into a space shuttle after Fallon’s note
- •Creating a wedding reception and first dance (‘Lovely Day’) for newlyweds
- •These moments elevate team morale and meaning at work
- •Hospitality as culture engine: engagement rises when people can give
- 29:01 – 33:01
Why companies lose the human touch—and the 95/5 rule to fund generosity
Will argues businesses over-index on what’s easy to measure, ignoring relationship-building that compounds over time. He outlines his ‘95/5’ financial discipline: manage costs ruthlessly to earn the right to reinvest a portion into memorable, loyalty-building gestures.
- •‘What gets measured gets managed’ biases firms against hospitality
- •Long-term competitive advantage = relationships, not product/brand alone
- •Businesses chase ‘today dollars’ at the expense of ‘tomorrow dollars’
- •Proposal: a P&L line item for reinvesting in the community served
- •Rule of 95/5: obsessive cost control to enable strategic generosity
- 33:01 – 41:51
Scaling graciousness: recurring moments, engagement kits, and the cockpit-delay playbook
Since bespoke magic can’t happen for everyone, Will describes ‘pattern recognition’—identifying frequent situations and designing a best-in-class response. Examples include engagement gifts (Tiffany boxes with flutes) and a pilot who turns tarmac delays into cockpit tours to lift morale.
- •Unscalable ‘magic’ is powerful, but needs a scalable foundation
- •Identify recurring moments (good and bad) and pre-design responses
- •EMP engagements: Tiffany boxes + gifted champagne flutes
- •Aviation example: pilot turns delays into cockpit tours to improve mood
- •Systemization makes great responses easy to deploy consistently
- 41:51 – 48:11
Hospitality as marketing: story-driven growth (UPS comp rule & investor gift cards)
Will reframes generosity as the smartest marketing spend because it creates stories people retell. He shares a UPS Store owner’s rule to comp one order per day (boosting culture and service) and reacts to Chris’s investor NFC card that lets investors gift free product instantly.
- •Reallocating spend: experiences can outperform traditional marketing
- •UPS Store tactic: one comped order/day up to $30
- •Win-win-win: customer delight, staff meaning, better service for everyone
- •Chris’s NFC investor cards: make it easy to gift product in the moment
- •Giving people tools to give creates distributed word-of-mouth
- 48:11 – 52:33
Serious about the craft, light about the self: levity, culture, and connection
They explore how taking yourself too seriously blocks connection and keeps everyone’s guard up. Will argues joy and humor break barriers, improve staff vibe, and ultimately improve performance and customer experience.
- •Take the work seriously; don’t let ego-polishing limit generosity
- •Levity lowers defenses and accelerates real connection
- •Over-seriousness often comes from insecurity and guardedness
- •Staff vibe is a key (unmeasured) driver of customer experience
- •Fun cultures tend to coincide with better execution
- 52:33 – 1:03:25
Think big, be patient—and the real cost of becoming #1 (finite vs infinite games)
Will shares his dad’s principle: be audacious in vision but patient in pursuit, because greatness takes time and seasons. He reflects on the tension between excellence (control/accountability) and hospitality (empowerment), the emptiness after winning, and the need to play both finite and infinite games to stay fulfilled.
- •‘Ambitious in vision, patient in pursuit’: audacity + time horizon
- •Excellence vs hospitality: control/accountability vs empowerment/initiative
- •The pursuit includes pain, exhaustion, and tension—not just fun
- •After the win: elation followed by emptiness if the goal was only finite
- •Finite wins matter for motivation; infinite mission sustains meaning
- 1:03:25 – 1:04:37
Closing: where to follow Will and what’s next
Will shares where to find his work and outlines his newsletter practice and upcoming book. Chris wraps with appreciation and the episode ends.
- •Unreasonablehospitality.com newsletter (biweekly writing practice)
- •New book: ‘Unreasonable Hospitality: The Field Guide’ (the ‘how’)
- •Encouragement to buy where you buy books
- •Chris credits Rory Sutherland for the recommendation
- •Final thanks and sign-off
