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Chelsea Handler: I Don’t Hate Joe Rogan — But He Needs to Do Better | Pivot

Subscribe to Pivot! https://www.youtube.com/@pivot?sub_confirmation=1 Scott-Free August continues, and Kara is joined by comedian Chelsea Handler. Chelsea clarifies her recent comments on Joe Rogan's income, and the two dig into Trump's bizarre catering truck ride in Turkey. They also discuss RFK Jr's new cooking show, and the widening cracks in the MAGA media ecosystem. Plus: the mystery of Mitch McConnell's absence, Melania Trump's next docuseries, and Chelsea's new side career as a matchmaker. 00:00 Intro 4:43 Chelsea’s Vacation Rules 9:33 Chelsea on Tour 13:34 Chelsea’s New Podcast Network 14:08 Joe Rogan Needs to Do Better 23:32 Trump’s Decoy Plot 30:26 RFK Jr. Cooking Show 34:42 MAGA Media Struggles 39:12 Where is Mitch McConnell? 40:20 Melania Docuseries 46:35 AOC Freezing Eggs 50:53 Chelsea Handler: Matchmaker 01:01:51 Predictions #PivotPodcast #KaraSwisher #ChelseaHandler #JoeRogan #DonaldTrump #RFKJr #MelaniaTrump #RightWingMedia #CateringTruck #AOC #Matchmaking Producers: Lara Naaman Zoë Marcus Taylor Griffin Todd Wiseman Video Editor: Rich Shibley Vox Media's Executive Producer of Podcasts: Nishat Kurwa Subscribe to Pivot on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/pivot/id1073226719 Subscribe to Pivot on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4MU3RFGELZxPT9XHVwTNPR Follow us on Instagram and Threads at: https://www.instagram.com/pivotpodcastofficial/ Follow us on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@PIVOTPODCAST Send us your questions by calling us at 855-51-PIVOT, or email pivot@voxmedia.com

Kara Swisherhost
Aug 14, 20261h 12mWatch on YouTube ↗

EVERY SPOKEN WORD

  1. 0:004:43

    Intro

    1. SP

      I don't think Joe Rogan's some evil guy.

    2. KS

      If you're getting 82 million, you have to do a lot better. [upbeat music] Hi, everyone, this is Pivot from New York Magazine and the Vox Media podcast network. I'm Kara Swisher, and once again, it's time for...

    3. SP

      Scott-Free August. [air horn]

    4. KS

      [laughs] That's right, Scott-Free August is well underway, and for my guest co-host today, I brought in another one of Scott Galloway's heroes, comedian, television host, seven-time New York Times bestselling author Chelsea Handler.

    5. SP

      Oh, Kara, it's so nice to be with you. I'm so happy-

    6. KS

      I know

    7. SP

      ... I'm so happy to be with you. I have to tell you, um, how much comfort you guys have provided me in-

    8. KS

      Really?

    9. SP

      ... in this, during this administration. And yeah, I just love tuning in. I love how reasonable you are. I love how you are able to insult people but remain on good terms with them. [laughs]

    10. KS

      Some of them. Some of them. Not all. [laughs]

    11. SP

      I love, I love your pragmatism.

    12. KS

      Mm-hmm.

    13. SP

      And, uh, I just, I just really appreciate-

    14. KS

      Thank you

    15. SP

      ... having something, a safe space to tune into when I really feel, uh, distressed. Uh, because you always seem to feel, uh, like there's a sense of optimism.

    16. KS

      Yes.

    17. SP

      And I think that's because you have young children-

    18. KS

      Yes

    19. SP

      ... so you have to be optimistic.

    20. KS

      I have to be.

    21. SP

      Yeah.

    22. KS

      I absolutely have to be.

    23. SP

      Right.

    24. KS

      I actually am. I actually am. I am a his- I'm a student of history, so I know that all things, all things come to an end.

    25. SP

      Yes.

    26. KS

      I'm a student of death. [laughs]

    27. SP

      I cannot wait for this all to come to an end.

    28. KS

      Yes.

    29. SP

      Let's, let's make it happen.

    30. KS

      Let's make it happen.

  2. 4:439:33

    Chelsea’s Vacation Rules

    1. KS

      I have to talk to you about your summer vacation, 'cause you put up a nine-slide Instagram carousel, which I loved, late last month about rules for family vacation season. Let me read an excerpt. "Our family is dysfunctional, and that is, uh, and that is what families are. What we need to work on, however, is manners. There is a definite shortfall of manners on this trip, and I left this trip feeling embarrassed and taken advantage of." What happened? I love this. I love your entire memo.

    2. SP

      Well, thank you. Um-

    3. KS

      Yeah

    4. SP

      ... I wanna first say that I wrote this, uh, in my last book, which came out a couple of years ago. So this is an older letter. It's not a newer letter. But what happened when I did write this letter in real time, 'cause a lot of people were like, "Why would you share something like this publicly?" And, and you know, my answer to, to that is always, "Why wouldn't I?" [laughs] Uh, but, um-

    5. KS

      Beautifully written.

    6. SP

      Thank you. Thank you. It was post-therapy, so I definitely had some skills that I hadn't had before when writing that letter. But also, um, I had sent that letter to two women who were mothers to get their feedback, uh, at the time that I wrote it to see if it was toned correctly, you know, and, you know, everything, and, uh, or the tenor was, was appropriate. And, uh, and they were both Asked if they could take the letter and send it to some of their friends, and they would take my name off of the letter. And I was like, "Okay." And they're like, "This is an amazing letter. You, you should definitely send this to your family." So I gave them permission to share that letter, and about nine months later, I got the letter sent to me from a friend who didn't know that I had written it.

    7. KS

      Oh, wow.

    8. SP

      And she said, "I just read this thing. It's so perfect. You have to send this to your family." [laughs]

    9. KS

      Oh. [laughs]

    10. SP

      I was like, "Oh my God. It's been around the world in 30 days." I go, "I, I wrote this letter." A- and she's like, "No, you didn't." I go, "Yes, I wrote this letter. It's in... It's coming out in my book." So-

    11. KS

      And it's about my family, right?

    12. SP

      And it's about my family. And because of that response, and because of the re- the realization that the impact that it had on so many people who felt similarly, I, I just thought, "Oh, this will help more people than it will hurt." My family had already read the letter, so they... And it's old news, so we're not still upset about it.

    13. KS

      What caused you to write it in the first place? I mean, I, I, I... What I thought when I heard it, I was like, "Ingrates." You know, when you, when you're throwing a... When I, I often pay for vacations too with the family, and I'm always like, "Why am I cleaning up?" Or, "Why am I... Why aren't you making your bed?" Or, "Why..." You know, that kind of stuff. And I use the term ingrates. Everyone thinks it's funny when I say it, but I'm like, "Ingrates, all of you." Um, and it's kind of had that tone w- in a good way. What, what w- what caused you to write it? Because my big thing is when my kids are not, and they are very polite to people who work for us or we hire cleaning people, or that, if that ever happens, I lose my mind. It doesn't. My s- my oldest son is extraordinarily polite to people who work for us, uh, and we hire.

    14. SP

      That's nice.

    15. KS

      Um, but it's a really big deal for me. That really, when I read that part, I was like, "Oh, I don't like that at all."

    16. SP

      Well, that is it. That's what it comes down to. It's like, hey, how are you parented? Who told you that, you know, that you didn't have to say hello and thank you and please and all of the things? So it was just kind of like I got excited. I l- went a little too hard too fast with my family. You know, I wanted to share my, everything I have with my family, with all my nieces and nephews and my brothers and sisters and their spouses. I was just always, I'm a generous person. I always wanna share and invite them and take them on these great adventures, and I just overdid it clearly, and the, they, they became accustomed-

    17. KS

      Accustomed

    18. SP

      ... um, to it. Acostumbrarse in español.

    19. KS

      [laughs]

    20. SP

      Acostumbrarse. I had to learn that word. They just became used to it without the-

    21. KS

      Yeah

    22. SP

      ... understanding of what it costs, what it takes.

    23. KS

      Costs you.

    24. SP

      It's a choice I make.

    25. KS

      Yeah.

    26. SP

      It's, I work really hard to pay for these things.

    27. KS

      Mm-hmm. Yeah.

    28. SP

      And your, your, um, your acclimation to it is a little bit too cozy.

    29. KS

      The acclimation is fast, isn't it? I said-

    30. SP

      Yeah

  3. 9:3313:34

    Chelsea on Tour

    1. KS

      on called The High and Mighty Tour. Explain your tour. It's like you added like a million and 100 cities. It's not much-

    2. SP

      Well, we just, we do it, we do it in s- phases, so you're always adding a second leg to your tour. You know, when you're a comedian, you do leg one, leg two. So The High and Mighty Tour is a feel-good, happy vibe tour to make sure everybody knows that there all, are, there are alternatives to dealing with the reality we're living in, and the biggest one being LSD and microdosing.

    3. KS

      [laughs]

    4. SP

      Um, there are a lot of, as you covered a lot in your CNN series-

    5. KS

      Yeah

    6. SP

      ... um, uh, you know, there are a lot of alternatives to dealing with this 24 hour a day news cycle, and I have had to become healthy in my thought process and in the way I go about dealing with this administration the second time around. The first time they stole my joy, and they stole my life, and I, you know, I let it go, and I was like, "They're not doing that again." And even though-

    7. KS

      Right, and they're 10 times worse, actually.

    8. SP

      10 times worse.

    9. KS

      Right.

    10. SP

      But my joy, like my joy is not for sale, and it's not, it's not up for grabs. And also, it's a responsibility as a comedian, and I say this very seriously, to provide a really good fucking time for other people-

    11. KS

      Right

    12. SP

      ... while we're all dealing with this.

    13. KS

      Right. Right. Yeah.

    14. SP

      And so I take that as a professional responsibility. One of my many professional responsibilities is to make sure people are having a good time, to remind people about humanity. When you're sitting in an audience, sitting next to a stranger that you've never met, and you're laughing so hard that your shoulders are rubbing, that's a great reminder of the fact that we're all in this together.

    15. KS

      But you don't ignore it either. You don't, you're, you're not one, like, first, you're not a bummer, and second of all, you don't, you are ki- you are a real news junkie in a lot of ways. Like, you do pay attention to everything pretty much.

    16. SP

      Yes. I do.

    17. KS

      Yeah. Yeah.

    18. SP

      But I don't let it drive me-

    19. KS

      Right

    20. SP

      ... in the way that I let it drive me into a hole the first administration.

    21. KS

      Mm-hmm. Right.

    22. SP

      You know?

    23. KS

      So LSD is the answer to this or what?

    24. SP

      Well, that is one answer, to be honest, Kara. Microdosing LSD. You know, I moved into my house in Whistler. I bought this little ski chalet in Whistler when COVID happened, and I had to escape my family. And I bought this little chalet on FaceTime 'cause I wanted to learn how to ski. I'm like, "If the borders are gonna shut down, I'm gonna go skiing and make a g- something good-

    25. KS

      [laughs]

    26. SP

      ... out of this horror show."

    27. KS

      You're gonna Maria von Trapp this thing going into it.

    28. SP

      Yes.

    29. KS

      You're-

    30. SP

      So I get into this house that I rented in Whistler, and I mean, sorry, that I bought, right? I get in and there's a manila envelope waiting for me, and on the manila envelope, it's from the previous owners. And they were like, "We were so excited when we found out that you were buying our house that we wanted to give you this gift. We make this." And I opened it, and it was 300 microdoses of LSD.

  4. 13:3414:08

    Chelsea’s New Podcast Network

    1. KS

      Let's talk a little about your podcast, 'cause hear you on a podcast, Dear Chelsea, which you started a few years ago and now streams on Netflix. And I, by the way, I-

    2. SP

      Which Scott, which Scott predicted-

    3. KS

      Yeah

    4. SP

      ... about a month before-

    5. KS

      Mm-hmm

    6. SP

      ... that happened. He predicted that iHeart podcasts were, or-

    7. KS

      Mm-hmm

    8. SP

      ... you know, a bunch of podcasts were gonna go-

    9. KS

      Yes

    10. SP

      ... and be on Netflix.

    11. KS

      Right. You've, this is the full podcast network with iHeart that you're, y- you have a-

    12. SP

      Yeah

    13. KS

      ... you have a, you have a full network bunch.

    14. SP

      We have a Netflix bought a bunch.

    15. KS

      Yeah, bought a bunch. Talk a little bit about that. What, the business strategy behind that and, and it, is it because you saw how much money Joe Rogan was making and figure you could

  5. 14:0823:32

    Joe Rogan Needs to Do Better

    1. KS

      do better than $82 million?

    2. SP

      [laughs] No.

    3. KS

      Boy, I didn't make it.

    4. SP

      No, I don't make, I don't make, I don't make $82 million a year. I don't think I've ever made $82 million a year-

    5. KS

      Yeah. Yeah

    6. SP

      ... if that's the right figure-

    7. KS

      Yeah

    8. SP

      ... for Joe Rogan.

    9. KS

      Yeah.

    10. SP

      And my, first of all, I wanna thank you for bringing up Joe Rogan because I wanna clarify that or actually expound on that. Um, Joe, like I don't think Joe Rogan's some evil guy, you know what I mean?

    11. KS

      Right.

    12. SP

      I don't think that. I've known Joe Rogan-

    13. KS

      Explain what happened. Explain what happened so people know. He, there was a-

    14. SP

      They were releasing how much money podcasters were making, and it said Joe Rogan made $82 million. Um, and I commented something about, "That's a lot of money for something to do with mis- the misinformation that, uh, that, or being misinformed." And, um, and I don't think Joe Rogan is like enemy number one. I, you know, like I just feel like, I don't feel, I know, because I've looked into this and, y- you know, there's so much research about it, that this whole manosphere and this whole, uh, this whole environment that is built on social media. It's like you go in through one portal and you, these young boys are being fed over and over and over again this information. So you go into Joe Rogan, who's got the biggest platform in podcasting and has, you know, is pretty responsible, has one, one of the biggest factors in getting Donald Trump elected, has this platform and it would really behoove us for him to use that for good in this moment when there are so many people who are, you know, former Trump supporters who are ready to admit how horribly wrong this has been going and how horrible this administration has been on multiple, you know, in multiple ways. You know, there's Dave Smith, there's Sean Strickland, those guys who are former Trump, uh, uh, supporters. But there's also really great guys that are standing up for the rights of women-

    15. KS

      Yep

    16. SP

      ... that are standing up for the rights of the LGBTQ community, that are standing up for people of color, that you wouldn't, that would seemingly be Trump supporters. There's people like Trae Crowder, um, John Russell on Instagram, Brian Andrews, and I wanna shout these guys out because they are sending such positive messaging and they are talking about this. You know, we're gonna get Todd Blanche. He, he's gonna be confirmed, and what's, he's gonna overturn Roe v. Wade. We're, we're all sitting around, all these men who have these powerful platforms are sitting around wa- watching this happen to women, to communities that you could instead be supporting. You don't have to like turn over a whole new leaf. It's just about being a decent human being.

    17. KS

      Right.

    18. SP

      You know, if I make a com-

    19. KS

      Right

    20. SP

      ... a comment about Joe or, and one of those guy... You know, Joe Rogan can lead, he's not the worst version of anything. He's just trying to be, I think he's genuinely trying to find out information. But when you do mess up, like come on, you know? That leads to guys going to the Fresh and Fit podcast. That leads to guys going to Andrew Tate, which is the worst, you know, version of that. But, and, and not comparing him to Joe. It's not the same thing.

    21. KS

      Yeah, no.

    22. SP

      But you get in this algorithm, and there have been so many studies that show that these boys-

    23. KS

      Yes

    24. SP

      ... you know-

    25. KS

      It goes from one thing to the next

    26. SP

      ... you, they did this study where they gave boys, they, they had blank phones, and they assigned them, you know, made them seem like they were teenage boys' phones, and within 23 minutes they're fed women-hating content.

    27. KS

      Yes, they are.

    28. SP

      How terrible women are. Women are ruining your lives.

    29. KS

      Mm-hmm.

    30. SP

      These people are taking your jobs. This is... And it's just hate, hate, hate, vitriol, vitriol, vitriol. And so I would just love for these guys to come full circle and be like, "Hey, actually we don't hate women. We, we, we don't want women's rights to be taken away." Like, wh- that's not, that shouldn't be controversial, you know? Like, we're obviously, the tenor of things has gotten so-

  6. 23:3230:26

    Trump’s Decoy Plot

    1. KS

      out of a movie or a Taylor Swift concert, a reported Iranian assassination threat against Donald Trump prompted an elaborate decoy operation during his trip to Turkey last month. Trump boarded the old Air Force One in front of cameras. He ditched his new Qatari gifted jet to ride on the legacy plane for old time's sake, as he put it, which was untrue. But, uh, shortly after boarding, he left one plane for another plane. He was secretly smuggled off the second plane in a catering trunk, uh, truck, and taken to a smaller military plane where he, which he flew home. Meanwhile, reporters and even some White House staff took off on Air Force One believing Trump was on board and were basically sitting ducks without being told of the assassination plot, so it was a decoy. That's what they called it. Um, what do you, what did you think about him getting smuggled out in a catering truck?

    2. SP

      Well, first of all, I love the idea of him being in a catering cart. I mean, this is a great way for him to bring back Trump Shuttle, his failed, bankrupt airline-

    3. KS

      Oh, yeah

    4. SP

      ... and make it a catering cart with wings.

    5. KS

      Yeah.

    6. SP

      That should be his next. Um, but A, I love, I love it. [laughs] I love it because, first of all, he's survived two assassination attempts, so why not just play Russian roulette? I mean, you're-

    7. KS

      Right, right

    8. SP

      ... bulletproof, right? Let's go for it-

    9. KS

      Right, yeah

    10. SP

      ... and see what happens.

    11. KS

      Let's... Right, exactly.

    12. SP

      But the idea that he... I saw what, his clip of what he said to the reporters-

    13. KS

      Mm-hmm

    14. SP

      ... after, like, "You're on a da- this is a very dangerous job. Maybe you'll..." While he bailed on them and was like, "You guys-"

    15. KS

      He bailed.

    16. SP

      Which of course, of course he would do at, at any time.

    17. KS

      Yeah, yeah.

    18. SP

      Um, but, um, that's good.

    19. KS

      So fake bravery, and then he jumps into the, into the-

    20. SP

      Yeah

    21. KS

      ... plane.

    22. SP

      I mean, no, I don't think anyone believes Donald Trump is brave at this point, you know. I mean, that's all gone out the window. Maybe some people still believe it, but, but yes, I love the idea of him riding around in a catering cart, hopefully on his knees for, to duck for cover, you know. Um, it's just such a circus-

    23. KS

      Yeah

    24. SP

      ... that it, it wouldn't, it... I was trying to think this morning before we started, like, what would be more ridiculous than what we're watching? And it, I was like, would Snooki, you know, from Jersey Shore be? Would one of the housewives, the Real Housewives-

    25. KS

      Yeah, yeah

    26. SP

      ... be more ridiculous? So it's like-

    27. KS

      But-

    28. SP

      ... no, actually, they would be more sensible Yeah, they would. They would. I, I, the fact that he, like, cut and run on people and then didn't tell them that they were a sitting duck, to me is, like, that's a-

    29. KS

      Oh.

    30. SP

      Yeah

  7. 30:2634:42

    RFK Jr. Cooking Show

    1. KS

      play something for you. It comes with a trigger warning.

    2. SP

      [upbeat music] Hi, I'm Robert F. Kennedy Jr., your HHS secretary. Welcome to The Real Food Show. Thanks to President Trump, we flipped the food pyramid and put real food back where it belongs, at the center of the American plate. I'm traveling across America, connecting with renowned chefs to show families how to cook delicious, nutritious meals with real ingredients, all at affordable prices. America, it's time to eat real food.

    3. KS

      Uh, there you have the dulcet tones of RFK Jr.'s new cooking show. Uh, do you think it's gonna be a hit? You, you've had some... You had a real estate beef with him, too, but, a- and then this week, of course, the vaccines, the childhood vaccination schedule, which most parents will be ignoring, at least in certain states.

    4. SP

      I hope so. I hope so.

    5. KS

      Yeah. Yeah. Most people just ignore it completely.

    6. SP

      Uh, I mean, the only positive thing about this is that maybe with so much food in his mouth, we won't be able to hear him talk. Um, I mean, uh, he is... Who asked for this, first of all? Who wants to watch sauteed roadkill? My experience with Robert F... Like, if it, if this is anything like my experience buying my house from him and Cheryl Hines, which I didn't know I was doing, 'cause it was a blind trust and I was buying in a blind trust, blah, blah, blah, uh- If it was anything like that experience, this show will cost $5 million [laughs] to subscribe to and $20 million to get the video to play.

    7. KS

      Right.

    8. SP

      So-

    9. KS

      And the taxpayer will pay for it.

    10. SP

      Yes, of course. Of course. And we don't need our heads of departments or j- uh, heads of Health and Human Services on TV shows. Why- That's also not ne- Nobody's asking for that. Nobody's asking to hear him talk more.

    11. KS

      Mm-hmm. He likes to talk. He's running for president, you know?

    12. SP

      Well, good luck with that.

    13. KS

      Well, then you'll be living in the ex-president-- You don't live there, right? In Manhattan.

    14. SP

      He's not gonna win. Nobody will listen to that voice. Nobody's down for that. Except for Sheryl Hines, I guess.

    15. KS

      [laughs] I guess. She seems to like it.

    16. SP

      Another, the most unqualified person for the job. Another person that shouldn't be doing this job, not only doesn't have, but shouldn't be anywhere near Health and Human Services, is running the department. And now some people who are uneducated about vaccines are gonna listen to that.

    17. KS

      Right.

    18. SP

      There will be people that will listen to it, of course.

    19. KS

      A hun- There's a lot now, and they f- Well, he's trying to deliver on his promises to wreck everything.

    20. SP

      But also-- Y- yeah, and that's another point, you know, th- that Trump is gonna tear everything apart on his way out.

    21. KS

      Yes.

    22. SP

      And spare no one. It's not just gonna be the Republican Party. It's gonna be America. So it's like that's even more why we need these guys like Joe Rogan to start gett- getting everybody mobilized because w- this is really dangerous.

    23. KS

      Do you ever think there's a bottom to things like this? 'Cause they seem to never reach the bottom.

    24. SP

      No, there is no bottom now.

    25. KS

      Like Bill Cassidy going, "I can't believe he did this vaccine thing." I'm like, are you not paying att- you know, after having just voted for Todd Blanche, you know?

    26. SP

      Right.

    27. KS

      After, after being tough and then not tough.

    28. SP

      I guess, I mean, I don't really understand the inner workings of how any of these political, like, these senators and, and congressmen can just think that... Like, there's-- They're gonna have to separate from him at some point. Like, it's not working. You know, his policies are not popular. People don't love him. They have to steal the next election if they're gonna win. People are hurting, you know? 70% of people in ICE detention centers have no criminal history. 70%. Like, that's what we're doing in our country. This is America. Like, at a certain point, we all have to stand up and say that enough is enough.

    29. KS

      Well, I'm not sure they do have to stand up, Chelsea.

    30. SP

      Maybe it's not these elected people. Maybe it's the other people that do have these huge spheres of influence. Um, but you know, I-

  8. 34:4239:12

    MAGA Media Struggles

    1. KS

      is to talk about the state of right-wing media. New York Times analysis of a dozen right-wing influencers found views falling for a lot of Trump's biggest allies, some hitting new lows. For example, Ben Shapiro's YouTube numbers are down from twenty-seven million weekly views in twenty twenty-four to about four million now. That's a real decline. Charlie Kirk's assassination caused some big divisions. Candace Owens went full conspiracy theory, and her audience spiked while others who just mourned him lost some ground. The pro and anti-Trump split has widened further since the Iran war began, with critics like, uh, Nick, Nick Fuentes gaining ground while loyalists are losing s- steam. Uh, the right-wing, you know, media system i- is really splintering in a really weird way. And speaking of right-wing media, Melania Trump's first documentary bombed, and she's gonna get in front of the camera anyway. She'll make a new multi-episode series coming to Prime Video this f- next fall, uh, this time going behind the scenes of the administration's early days. Her first film reportedly grossed under seventy million dollars against a seventy-five million budget. You'd love to get that deal, I'm sure. It seems like this is part of a forty million deal she made with Amazon in the first documentary. Doesn't appear she'll be paid more for this. I mean, talk a little bit about this right-wing ecosystem. They love to talk about you, the AOC. There's are certain characters they love to go after.

    2. SP

      Oh, yeah, AOC. They're upset she's freezing her eggs now?

    3. KS

      Yeah. Mm-hmm.

    4. SP

      Is that the, their latest thing?

    5. KS

      Yeah. Yeah.

    6. SP

      Yeah, because they prefer w- [laughs] they prefer women to get pregnant the old-fashioned way, non-consensually.

    7. KS

      Yeah. [laughs]

    8. SP

      Um, she-- I'm glad she's-- I love AOC. I love AOC. I think the right-wing fracturing is also emblematic of, you know, what's happening in the Democratic Party. We have our own fracturing that we have to deal with. And I think, you know, uh, this old institutional, like, kind of bias towards these traditional candidates is not what's happening right now. It's not the temperature. You know, we're seeing what's happening in Michigan with Mondaire. These candidates are L- AOC. They are popular. Uh, they're, they're bringing the vibes, and there's-- heading the country in a different direction. And it's like, you better get on the bus because the bus is leaving the station.

    9. KS

      Right.

    10. SP

      So we have to be careful about not fracturing our own party and in, and i- and in some d- in ways, figuring out how to appeal to these people that are fracturing from, from the Republican Party and bring them over and form a bigger coalition than the one we have, because anything's better than this. You know what I mean? I'm willing to compromise on issues. Uh, uh, you know, I'm, I know I'm not in a position of power, so please, like, whatever headline this turns into, I j- I j- it's like let's all get-- Let, let's get on board with what's, like, basic decency and humanity. Like, we can't be in the streets-- Like, it feels like we're about to have a civil war, and there's one person in charge of that tenor in this country, and it's our president, you know? And everything that is sprinkling down from it-- And I'm stating the obvious. I know I'm platitudinizing right now.

    11. KS

      No, no, not at all. But I mean, I'm not sure there's anything wrong with ... dissent within the Democratic Party at least. We, uh, Republicans look like they're just get on board or else kinda thing. They look like hostages in a lot of ways, or else regretful, right? Reg- oh, I'm regretting my vote. Um, I, I think one of the things that's really interesting, I was just thinking about last night, is there's such an attack against the DSA candidates or, or, or progressive cand- let's do more broadly, not everybody's in DSA, they're more progressive. Um, and to me I'm like, look, these guys are out organizing on the street, like organizing, they're doing the real work of organizing, which I think is how you win elections, and the old guard hasn't organized in a long time. They did before, and then they're sort of from the cheap seats insulting them. Like, "If we don't, if we're not cautious we're not gonna get these other people back." And I don't, I'm not so sure caution is a good idea anymore.

    12. SP

      Well, what do you think?

    13. KS

      You know, I-

    14. SP

      What do you-

    15. KS

      I, I think, you know, I just, I f- I kept thinking when they kept attacking people for voting, young, they yell, as I've said this before, they yell at young people for not voting, and then when they vote and get involved they say, "That's a stupid thing." And I'm like, you know what? It's, first of all, you're gonna die first, so stop. Like some of you, especially you over there, you're gonna die. Not you, but you know what I mean, like some of them are quite old. I'm like, this isn't about your future in any way. It's about their future, so let them make their mistakes. Maybe they're making a mistake, maybe they're not, but it seems like we can't tell them to be involved, and when they get involved tell them they're stupid. I just don't see how that makes any sense-

    16. SP

      I agree with you

    17. KS

      ... whatsoever.

    18. SP

      But, and if we're talking about age and futures-

  9. 39:1240:20

    Where is Mitch McConnell?

    1. KS

      Mm-hmm

    2. SP

      ... I'd like to talk about Mitch McConnell's future.

    3. KS

      Yes. Yes, okay, please.

    4. SP

      I, I would like-

    5. KS

      Please go there

    6. SP

      ... to make a predict- another prediction- [laughs]

    7. KS

      Okay, all right

    8. SP

      ... for the prediction part.

    9. KS

      Okay, please.

    10. SP

      I predict that Mitch McConnell is dead.

    11. KS

      Yeah.

    12. SP

      He is no longer with us, and-

    13. KS

      Okay

    14. SP

      ... that we will find this out-

    15. KS

      Really dead. Dead dead, like we're gonna find his dead-

    16. SP

      I believe that he is... Yes, I do.

    17. KS

      Okay.

    18. SP

      I believe he's dead.

    19. KS

      Not just out of it. Not just-

    20. SP

      Brain dead?

    21. KS

      Yeah.

    22. SP

      Oh, no. I believe-

    23. KS

      No. Yeah

    24. SP

      ... yeah, he's a goner.

    25. KS

      Okay. All right.

    26. SP

      Or he's getting a BBL, and he'll be back and up and running in no time.

    27. KS

      Wait, what's a BBL?

    28. SP

      I think it's a Brazilian butt lift.

    29. KS

      Okay. [laughs] All right, okay. Right, okay. [laughs] All right, so he took a seven-week, uh, leave, absence from the Senate, standard medical leave.

    30. SP

      Paid leave. Paid leave-

  10. 40:2046:35

    Melania Docuseries

    1. SP

      the Melania documentary-

    2. KS

      Okay, tell-

    3. SP

      ... and I wanna know if you watched the first one.

    4. KS

      I did not. I couldn't do it. I didn't-

    5. SP

      I did

    6. KS

      ... I couldn't do it. You did? Okay.

    7. SP

      Yeah.

    8. KS

      Tell me.

    9. SP

      Well, you don't take drugs.

    10. KS

      All right.

    11. SP

      I took an edible, and I had-

    12. KS

      Okay

    13. SP

      ... some friends over-

    14. KS

      Which one?

    15. SP

      ... and we started, uh, just a-

    16. KS

      Just a-

    17. SP

      ... edible, a gummy. Like a-

    18. KS

      Gummy

    19. SP

      ... cannabis edible.

    20. KS

      A lot?

    21. SP

      And we went... No. No, no, no. I just took 10 milligrams.

    22. KS

      Okay, all right.

    23. SP

      A lot for some people, but not for me. I'm kind of like a tank. Um-

    24. KS

      Yeah, I know.

    25. SP

      And I, it was pretty amazing.

    26. KS

      Okay.

    27. SP

      It was just her walking around. There's a lot of voiceover because her talking directly to the camera I think is problematic. Um, and there's, she changes outfits in a dining room about seven to eight times within the first 20 minutes, and it's really about her planning the White House inaugural ball, which d- you, your takeaway from that is that she had absolutely nothing [laughs] to do with it after she's demonstrated how much she had to do with it.

    28. KS

      Yeah, yeah.

    29. SP

      Um, and so it was pretty ridiculous, right? It's absolutely ridiculous. But the idea that she's getting another opportunity to do something, it's like I've never seen someone who doesn't speak up for anything or stand for anything keep getting a platform to say absolutely nothing.

    30. KS

      Yeah.

  11. 46:3550:53

    AOC Freezing Eggs

    1. KS

      at her age, she's younger than that, a- a- and telling her how to have a baby, I got furious. I don't know why. It just really... 'Cause I think it's because when I got pregnant, uh, someone, when I was trying to get pregnant the first time, I got pregnant right away. Uh, a doctor said, "Oh, you're having a geriatric pregnancy" 'cause I'd chosen to work 'cause I h- had to before that 'cause that's how you have to build a career, and I was so angry at the time that someone, you know, essentially a senior pregnancy is like you took too much time. The implication was that, and so I think that probably set me off from long ago, but it sort of infuriated. That does get me angry, that kind of stuff, people in other people's-

    2. SP

      Oh, really? Men deciding what women are gonna do-

    3. KS

      Yeah

    4. SP

      ... with their bodies and weighing in-

    5. KS

      Yeah

    6. SP

      ... gets you angry? I can't imagine-

    7. KS

      Yeah. [laughs]

    8. SP

      ... why.

    9. KS

      I do get... I, I start to curse. I shouldn't do it. I felt bad-

    10. SP

      But, uh, you know what's so funny? You know, I get so much crap from, like, guys like that who are like, "She's, she's so sad and lonely" and-

    11. KS

      That... Yeah. [laughs]

    12. SP

      ... like, what? Okay. Okay. But anyway, even if I were, okay fine, but why do you want me to ha- you want me to have another me? You want another-

    13. KS

      Yeah

    14. SP

      ... Chelsea running around who's gonna be even more outspoken than me? Like, you should be grateful I'm not procreating 'cause I'm not bringing anything that you're gonna want your way.

    15. KS

      I think you'd be an excellent parent. I have to tell you, I think you'd be-

    16. SP

      Well, thank you

    17. KS

      ... a very good parent.

    18. SP

      I, I doubt that, but I appreciate-

    19. KS

      I think you would be

    20. SP

      ... your support.

    21. KS

      I think you, you would be.

    22. SP

      Appreciate your f- I appreciate your virtue signaling to me. [laughs]

    23. KS

      I'm not virtuous. I think you would be. I think you'd be a very funny parent.

    24. SP

      I have, um, a nice-- I feel very happy or, uh, not happy, I just feel very, like, I have a great perspective because of my singledom, because of my-- because I'm not blinded by my own set of, my own set of children. Do you know what I mean? Like I s- I see all of it. I have friends. I have family. I watch it all, so I feel like I have a pretty healthy, um, A, respect for parents, um, and everyone who shows up as a parent, but also, you know, bad parenting is pretty obvious.

    25. KS

      It is. That's the reason... Well, Elon Musk, nice to meet you. A lot-- It's not an explan- It's, uh, not an excuse, it's an explanation for many of these people.

    26. SP

      Mm-hmm. Right.

    27. KS

      Speaking of that, let's go on a quick break. When we come back, we'll talk about Chelsea's Instagram dating service. The support for the show comes from Bilt. Congratulations, you made your monthly housing payment. Would you like a cookie? How about some travel points or a virtual personal assistant? Well, with Bilt, you can actually have all that and more. Bilt has expanded from their original Renter Rewards program, and they have a lot more going on for members now. Members can earn points on mortgage payments too. Each housing payment you make earns you points, and you can put them towards flights with top travel partners like United and Hyatt, Lyft rides, amazon.com purchases, and much, much more. And about that virtual personal assistant thing, Bilt also gives members access to what they call a neighborhood concierge. It can make restaurant reservations, book fitness classes, and find new local spots, all while rewarding you at more than 45,000 merchant partners. They say it's basically like having a personal assistant baked into where you live. It's simple. Being a renter and now owning a home can feel a lot better with Bilt. Download the Bilt app and join the membership for where you live at joinbilt.com/pivot. That's J-O-I-N-B-I-L-T.com/pivot. Use our link so they know we sent you. Support for the show comes from Quince. Hate to break it to you, but now it's August and it means summer is almost over. Maybe that's a relief. Autumn means cooler weather, which also means it might be time to find some cozy cold weather staples. Enter Quince. Quince specializes in effortless high-quality essentials like ultra-soft organic cotton and premium Mongolian cashmere sweaters. They're beautifully tailored, built to last, and transition seamlessly from morning meetings to dinner. Quince also has premium stretch denim starting at just $50 with the kind of perfect fit, structure, and weight you'd expect from a luxury designer brand. I really have liked all my Quince stuff, and actually I'm gonna buy some more stuff for the fall. I love their sweaters. I like all their sweaters. I wear one of their cardigans all the time, and I like all their pieces. They're very comfortable. Upgrade your every day. Download the Quince app for app exclusive offers or go to quince.com/pivot to get free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada and in the UK too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E.com/pivot. Chelsea, we're back. You've become quite a matchmaker lately. I love

  12. 50:531:01:51

    Chelsea Handler: Matchmaker

    1. KS

      mat- ... You know I'm a matchmaker, too, but only quietly. After starting your own dating service on Instagram, as I understand it, your motivation was your frustration with dating apps. You've said, uh, you've said endless options have created a generation that's unwilling to commit, but your matchmaking is yielding results, so clearly you're doing something right. Explain how it works. And, and in Scott Galloway's absence, I'd like you to deliver a message to the young men out there. What are they getting wrong about dating and relationships?

    2. SP

      Um, I just-

    3. KS

      So talk about this

    4. SP

      ... there's a lot. Listen, my, my platform is, uh, mostly women and gay men, so I have access to tons of women. And I h- I can't tell you, the conversations among women these days, whether they're 20 years old or 45 years old, are all the same, which is it's impossible to meet someone. Men are so, I guess have grown so accustomed to these dating apps and swiping that there's such an abundance that there's no real need, right, for connection. It's like, "Well, there's gonna be another 10 girls tomorrow," or whatever that does to your brain. Um, so I wa- I just, I was at this dinner one night with all these successful women, and they were all telling me the same thing, and I just was like, "This isn't..." And the da- dating app is not for me, to be clear. This is for people on my site who wanna... I've matched a lot of couples. A lot of people meet at my shows. Since I'm on tour, they'll meet online, and then they'll meet at my show. Like, in Philly, I have these two couples that I'm gonna do something special with. But w- like, th- you basically send DMs to me and tell me if you're serious about finding a relationship, about yourself, and you have to have an open account. And then we're just, we're not d- I have a social media, um, company-

    5. KS

      Mm-hmm

    6. SP

      ... that does a lot of my, does all my social work for me, basically. And we're just trying to put people out there. Like, men who are serious about finding relationships and looking for love, we're giving them a platform on my page to say, "Hey, here. Here you go, ladies. Go hit them up." And for lesbians, for gay guys, we do it for all different, you know, pairings. And it's been, we've yielded success. I have a couple couples that have been together now for, like, three or four months.

    7. KS

      Wow.

    8. SP

      I just showcased a lesbian couple a couple weeks ago. They're in love.

    9. KS

      Oh.

    10. SP

      They've been together for, like, four months. And, um, this other straight couple has been dating for two months, and they're coming to see, they're, they're coming to one... Like, it's really sweet.

    11. KS

      So you're creating a community is what you're doing. You're using community-

    12. SP

      I mean, I hope so

    13. KS

      ... Yeah.

    14. SP

      It's just something that I wanted to do to spread joy and love, and, like, I hope that people find each other. But again, listen, I don't, I have to, you know, like, I, I... We're not doing, we're not going down the rabbit hole researching these guys inside and out.

    15. KS

      Mm-hmm. Yeah.

    16. SP

      You have-- We're just kind of saying, "Hey, here are some guys who are looking for relationships. Maybe you guys can connect." I mean-

    17. KS

      Mm-hmm

    18. SP

      ... so I probably will have to stop it for legal reasons [laughs] at some point.

    19. KS

      Yes. [laughs] The first-

    20. SP

      It's like-

    21. KS

      The first, uh, problem. Criminal behavior.

    22. SP

      [laughs]

    23. KS

      Um, no, I like it. I, I, I did a lot of Yentl, doing the Yentl thing for a while, but I did it in a different way. I was very surreptitious and sneaky. I would meet these two friends of mine I thought should be together, and they didn't really like each other in college. And, uh, I, I kept making dinner plans with each of them separately, and then at the same place, and then I would not show up. I'd be like, "I'm at work at the Washington Post. I can't arrive." And so they would be forced into dinner together. Like, oh-

    24. SP

      Ooh

    25. KS

      ... this person's meeting-

    26. SP

      That is, I like that.

    27. KS

      I know. Isn't it good? And they ended up getting married. They have children, and they've been married forever. Like, I just felt like they belonged together. I just decided. It was, I felt like-

    28. SP

      That's really, I love that story.

    29. KS

      I know. I, I believe in-

    30. SP

      I love it

  13. 1:01:511:12:28

    Predictions

    1. KS

      I'm gonna predict that, um, um,

    2. SP

      Abdul El-Sayed wins Michigan

    3. KS

      Oh, good one. Why is that? Tell me why. Besides being-

    4. SP

      I just-

    5. KS

      ... a handsome devil

    6. SP

      ... I just think that this, this midterm is gonna be a big referendum on Donald Trump, and it... You, you wanna see a pendulum swing, it's gonna swing, so all those Trump voters are gonna get this in return. Um, that's what I think. Karmically-

    7. KS

      What do you make of the attempts to make all this sort of anti-Islamic stuff, Nancy Mace being at the forefront of that. But everybody, they're trying to take the, trying to make him a terrorist, they're using-- They're, they're sort of jihadist everything. They're communist everything. They're throwing at this-

    8. SP

      Yeah

    9. KS

      ... this one guy

    10. SP

      I mean, the word communist is so silly to be using in any framework that we're talking about with these people, that that goes in one ear and out the other. It's really race, race, like it's all racial, obviously. Um, I think, you know, the more people that are not white that are in office is a good thing, not a bad thing. It's more reflective of actually what this country is and what we show during the World Cup, which was a welcoming of all of these people in these small towns and, and, or in bigger cities. But these, you know, people coming from different countries and different cultures and, and people preparing different dishes and Somalian food and this food and, and like real... That was America. That is who we are, and that was so nice for the world to see just in time so that they know that not everybody-

    11. KS

      We can do it

    12. SP

      ... is-

    13. KS

      Yeah

    14. SP

      ... yeah. Um, you know, the welcoming of that, uh, uh, of difference. And so I just, you know, I-- The more women we can get elected, the better. The more Brown people we can get elected, the better. Uh, we need an age limit on our politics and on our, our official, you know, our offices and political appointments. Everyone needs to get the fuck out of politics at a certain age. I'm not sure what that age is, but somewhere in your 70s, early 70s. Um, and then go swim in a lake. You know? Like, and I don't know how much, like, money all these people need, but it is-- it feels like the death cough of white male patriarchy when you see people like Mitch McConnell, who probably has a, a, a, an ID tag on one of his toes right now-

    15. KS

      [laughs]

    16. SP

      ... and is also serving. You know, like-

    17. KS

      Yeah

    18. SP

      ... it's a wrap on that. And so-

    19. KS

      Yeah

    20. SP

      ... hopefully this whole new wave of people-

    21. KS

      Mm-hmm

    22. SP

      ... is gonna set a different standard for what-

    23. KS

      Yeah

    24. SP

      ... we're gonna accept in American politics

    25. KS

      All right, El-Sayed. Yeah.

    26. SP

      I like it

    27. KS

      So I'm gonna-

    28. SP

      I like that prediction. I have a feeling too. I do. I-- It's interesting 'cause there's definitely a clap back, right? To him. He, he seems to-- To me, the attacks mean they're scared of him. I think they're worried that he is very appealing. I thought for El-Sayed, there was a commercial that his grandparents made, um, uh, that... I don't know if you see it, but it's fantastic. It's this- I didn't see it

    29. KS

      He has two-- these grandparents and, and couldn't be whiter people. Like it's really kind of-- I think they did this on purpose. I, I have to say, it's a fantastic, fantastic... They look like, uh, Michiganders, like, as w- as the way the, the, the, the, the racist parts are trying to pretend, but they didn't-- they did it in such a beautiful way, a loving way, that it was really well done. Um, this guy is like-- has got it all from high school on. He seems to have, like, done everything right, the right way. Um, so-

    30. SP

      Yeah, he's pretty-- Yeah, he's pretty, uh, magnetic, and you wanna watch him, and yeah. And I also-- Yeah, the anti-Muslim thing is also wrapped in, you know, anyone who speaks out against Israel is, is anti- an anti-Semite. I'm not on board with that either. I do not believe that everybody who speaks out against Israel is anti-Semitic. I don't think that's true. I understand there's a lot of anti-Semitism. I'm not gonna dispute that. That's out there. I'm a Jewish person. I get it. But, you know, uh, so, like, I, I don't like that argument for all of these candidates too. Mamdani's doing wonderful things for New York City. He's doing a lot of wonderful things for New York City, and so you can't ignore that. And, you know-

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