Dr. Shadé Zahrai3 Tips for better first impressions, productivity & pay raises | ABC7 News Live - Shadé Zahrai
CHAPTERS
- 0:00 – 0:20
How first impressions are formed: warmth first, then competence
Shadé Zahrai explains what social cognition research says about snap judgments in first encounters. People assess warmth (likeability and trust) within seconds, followed by competence (respect).
- •First-impression judgments happen subconsciously in seconds
- •Two primary dimensions: warmth (like/trust) then competence (respect)
- •Understanding the order helps you prioritize how you show up early in an interaction
- 0:20 – 0:50
Why “polished” body language fails without authenticity
She notes that common first-impression tactics can backfire if they’re performative. Authenticity is the multiplier—people can detect inauthentic behavior, which erodes warmth and trust.
- •Typical advice: eye contact, smiling, leaning in, confident voice
- •These tactics can backfire when they feel forced or strategic
- •Authenticity is crucial because people quickly sense incongruence
- 0:50 – 1:08
A simple habit to become naturally warmer: look for genuine positives
Shadé recommends a mindset shift: consciously seek positive qualities in the person you’re meeting. That internal state makes your warmth more natural, and enables genuine praise.
- •Consciously find positive qualities in others (even small ones)
- •This creates a naturally warmer presence
- •Use authentic, specific flattery (e.g., compliment enthusiasm) to build rapport
- 1:08 – 1:28
A quick competence signal: introduce yourself with first and last name
To boost perceived respectability, she suggests sharing both your first and last name. It subtly communicates confidence and value during introductions.
- •State your first and last name in introductions
- •Frames you as “valuable enough” to be fully identified
- •A small wording change can increase perceived competence
- 1:28 – 1:38
The phone-first habit: why checking your phone right after waking is risky
The hosts shift to productivity habits, asking about checking phones first thing in the morning. Shadé explains the brain-state transition after waking and why immediate phone use can be destabilizing.
- •Many people check phones immediately upon waking
- •Waking can involve transitioning from delta to “daydreamy” theta
- •The brain is especially malleable during this period
- 1:38 – 2:08
How morning phone use can trigger stress mode and derail your day
She warns that jumping straight into email/social media can move you into alert mode too quickly. Encountering negative content early can activate stress responses that linger throughout the day.
- •Phone use can “skip” the theta window and force alert mode
- •Negative emails/social posts can trigger stress physiology
- •The first ~20 minutes can set the tone for the entire day
- 2:08 – 2:33
Better first 20 minutes: gratitude, meditation/prayer, affirmations, visualization
Instead of scrolling, she recommends intentional practices that stabilize mood and focus. These routines help you start with calm, direction, and optimism.
- •Use a morning gratitude practice
- •Meditate or pray to center attention
- •Repeat affirmations or visualize your week/day
- •Consistent morning intention-setting produces noticeable changes
- 2:33 – 2:37
When to ask for a raise: only if value and pay are misaligned (and framing matters)
The conversation turns to compensation, and Shadé encourages people to ask for a raise when they truly believe they’re underpaid relative to their contribution. She emphasizes that the request must be framed strategically to avoid losing the opportunity.
- •Ask for a raise if you genuinely believe you’re underpaid for your value
- •There’s “no harm in asking,” but delivery matters
- •Poor framing can undermine your chances
- 2:37 – 3:07
Five-step raise script (1–2): gratitude + evidence of performance
She outlines a structured approach that begins with appreciation and then moves to proof. The goal is to ground the request in outcomes and feedback rather than emotion or need.
- •Step 1: open with gratitude and positive context
- •Step 2: present evidence—specific deliverables over a time period
- •Include concrete achievements and feedback received
- 3:07 – 3:37
Five-step raise script (3–5): market comparison, clear ask, request support + document it
Shadé completes the framework with benchmarking, a direct number, and a collaborative close. She also advises following up via email to create documentation of what was discussed.
- •Step 3: cite market value using comparable roles/companies
- •Step 4: make a specific salary request (a clear number)
- •Step 5: ask for the boss’s support with the request
- •Follow up immediately with an email summary for documentation
- 3:37 – 3:54
Wrap-up: hosts react and note the Australia time difference
The hosts praise the specificity of the advice and thank Shadé for joining from Australia. Shadé shares it’s just after midnight, and the segment closes with goodbyes.
- •Hosts highlight the value and specificity of the tips
- •Shadé notes it’s just past midnight in Australia
- •Final thanks and sign-off
